Another Below Deck Podcast - We'll Pay You Later | RHOC S20 Premiere

Episode Date: July 12, 2026

Dylan, Pat and Ruby are back to break down feet rubbing, donkeys, kids, sandwiches, fries, love, speeding and more from Bravo's RHOC.PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/anotherpodcastnetwork  YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@badtvpod  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/badtvpodcast/?hl=en

Her new boyfriend's Michael. He's been around for four years and he fills her love tank. Now, this is a famous line for many, many, many years ago, almost OG. Because Dawn did not fill her love tank. But finally someone is doing it and not pretending to have cancer or use her money to fund a run for the governorship. Love tank sounds like a white snake song. That is gross. Hi.

Hello. And welcome to another brand smacking new episode of Bad Television. I'm Dylan, and that is Pat. Hi. Leader of the Rebellion. Ruby's here too. Hi, Ruby. Hey, Dil.

Ruby. Hi, Dil. Hi, Pat. Off to a little melancholy type of start. I can already tell. I'll tell you why. You're going to need to host these shows moving forward. I, I, like, can I, can, I, can, I don't want to start the season off on, okay.

Okay. But, oh, this group of women, we're breaking down the real housewives of Orange County, it's one of the most confounding things in reality television, why this cast has not been gutted. And, and gutted with a mercilessness that we require in reality TV producing in favor of some arbitrary, imagined fiction of nostalgia and legacy to get to 20. Go, Dylan. Go. Go. The audience wants this.

Go, go. We have Meatball Back, who I love so much, and I only want her and Travis to be happy, and I only also want her off my TV. We have Emily, who looks fantastic, and I think Pandas is scary, and it breaks my heart, but I also want that so far away. Then we have Tamara, who I hate more than a lot of politicians that I hate, and you know that I hate politicians with a fervency that is, Too intense at times.

Tamara Judge is a rat fuck monster who I don't want to watch on a weekly basis. Then we have Heather Debrough who just reminds everyone that the wealthy are psychos. And I just don't understand why we're here again. I am happy about Vicky. So I'll give it four tips. Shannon Badoor. How about, I'm saying, no, my point is I hate her.

Now she's like, like, now she's like, now she's. She's turning the, like, now she's officially old and falls down all the time. Shannon Bador, I'm just going to fall down. I'm just going to fall down. I'm old. I can't get out of the car. I don't like Shannon Bador here. I don't like her schick.

She's clearly now said, I'm just going to fall down and I'm old and I can't do anything. And I hate it. Four tits. Four tits? Okay. I agree with some of what you've said mainly about Tamara. What I would like to change of what you said is I don't like Vicky. I don't think Vicky deserves to be back here.

I thought the most disturbing thing that I had seen in 48 hours was her saying, I will pay you later to the people that massage my feet. I really, what I will say is the new girl, spice alert. That's going to be very fun to watch her navigate. One, being a real estate agent broker while Gina's trying to build this massive business. And two, she's skinny. She has big tits. And Vicki hates people that do that.

I built this thing. Yeah. Yeah. So we have that. We have Jen continuing to parent and live the way that she does. Don't know how you're there. Her son was up here yesterday late and shit on fire. Wow.

Wow. Didn't get caught, though. So taught him well. And Heather's mom. Oh, my God. We're going to talk about her. But I hope. Youth and eyes.

Let's go ahead and say it. Yeah. I mean, care. Let's go ahead and say it. She here, okay, here's, we'll, we'll talk about her. I hope we see her not as a friend of. Sprinkle her in like a, like as often as you get food poisoning. I don't want it that much. I want to, I want to walk back the euthanization comment because I don't think that. About Heather's mom. Yeah. She's going to die soon anyway. So, no, she won't. She's got at least another decade in her hands down. A hundred percent. No, I know, but that's enough. We don't need to intervene.

That juice is expensive, is what I'm saying. How many tits? 38. I mean, can you imagine being in Puerto Vallarta at whatever all-inclusive swingers compound you and your boo are at, and having the people work there rubbing your feet and then you pay them later, I can't even believe. I'm going to sound crass. She sat in that. I could never let people massage my feet.

I don't like massages. I get weird when a girl gives me a blowjob. I don't, I am uncomfortable with it. Sure. I cannot let people service me. What about when your wife does it versus the girl? I'm still.

You know what I think it's a year is love thing because I think it's a self love thing. No, I'm kidding. Go ahead. It's a self-love thing because I don't know. Well, it's definitely like a body issue thing, but it's also,

I think a self-love thing because I absolutely refuse. to have a woman or a man from a foreign land touching my feet? What kind? What am I in a palaquin? Is this Game of Thrones? I don't like it. That's just me. I know that's a little bit crazy. I've had three massages in my life. They've all been extremely corrective because there's an emergency because I can't turn my head actually and I can't drive. But nothing to enjoy anything. Four tits, 38 tits. How many tits? All right. I have an Easter egg in this episode.

I'm sorry, this is getting sexual. Yeah. When they walk into Heather DeBrow's party in the corridor before they actually go into the building, there was someone that's Patrick's familiar with from a little while ago. I had sex with a woman that is in that corridor. All the hint I'm going to give you is she's not Caucasian, but she's right there in one of the scenes. And I was like, holy shit.

Holy shit. Were you watching with your wife? No. No, we watched the screeners. Oh, that's right. Actually, I don't even know if she made the cut. But anyway, I saw her. I was like, oh, my God.

She was married at the time. I'm not proud of this, but she used to come up to Hollywood. You shouldn't be proud of that. I'm not proud of it. You shouldn't be. You know, we should say there was not enough pomp and circumstance, I don't think. Those Orange County ladies, they're all, ooh, I was going to give a hint at what she did for a living.

They're all real estate agents. Yeah, she was real estate. agent. Those elephants, they're all gray. It's like, not enough pomp and circumstance to Ruby actually being in studio with us. She's flown home because we said that Lucy was sleeping by herself during the day in her crib. And Ruby said, I am, I booked a ticket 15 minutes later. Yeah, just to really quickly make that clear.

That's exactly what happened. My brother informed me that my niece was now sleeping in a new way. And I said, that's so unbelievably heartbreaking that I haven't been here to witness it. I'm booking a ticket on this FaceTime. And now I'm here. And that was four days ago. Yep. Really, really exciting to have Ruby here.

Six tits. Cool. And we'll talk about Bador. The dog people are betraying the collective bargaining agreement that we've all signed. They are a malevolent form of oblivious. And we're seeing that writ large in our society, especially in metropolitan life. They have to be stopped. I don't know.

I don't know what to do about these fucking dog people. We'll get into it when she ignores the sign that says no dogs. All right. Let's get into it. And get in the comments. Let us know what you think about a 20th time watching these ladies get together. Are you excited? Are you super excited?

Let us know. So there's a package for the nostalgia heads. Any thoughts on that? Because this is your favorite franchise of Housewives. Yeah, yeah. Well, we get that look back to 2006 where the show was selling this vision of lives behind gates with huge homes and expensive cars and these bigger lives than we were having as we were watching this show, this new. network on Bravo. 20 years later, Meatball lives

in a three-bedroom townhouse with 18 kids. The rest of the cast lives in shitty fucking track homes. The dollar was stronger in 2006. Well, fair enough. One of whom lives in her boyfriend's house, who I think she's

only living with him because it's a free house. And, you know, to be fair, the house is paid for with stolen money. She'd be starting fires with her homeless son if she didn't have Brian. Right. So it's a different show now. It's a completely different show.

So the beginning of this feels like... By the way, Shannon Bador used to have money. You know, when she was living with that asshole, they had a fucking basketball court in their house. What happened with that, Rooms? Did she not go hard enough in the divorce? Do not get divorced. Seriously. When you have to split up $15 million and things like that,

it goes really quickly. It goes really quickly. Also, this seems light to me. that rental that she has is 12 grand a month that's light yeah how do you know that it said it they said it was like 10,500 dollars all right so the beginning of this feels like a fucking gonzow episode of this show like we're in Mexico with no context whatsoever we're just in Mexico, Vicky and Shannon are falling over in the same- Let's open it up! Shannon can't walk. Vicki- She can walk. That's her thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but so she's doing, that's her thing. And also, Vic- Oh, sorry. That's Archie. He said that. It's bullshit. No, that wasn't Archie. That was actually a lot of dogs. So maybe next time- No, he's in a habit. now he's happy. Just one dog barking. No, he's in heaven now with friends. He's in heaven now with friends. Rest in peace, Archie.

And I really, we do. We mean it. We mean it. We're dog people. We just don't let our dogs jump up on the produce section, the misted produce section at grocery stores. We'll get there. Yeah.

Fucking crazy. But there's this moment where Vicky says, I'm very stressed free here. And Shannon says, no, you're not. You came in here in an anaphylactic shock because you broke a coffee mug. And I'm just going, what the fuck is going on? What are we talking about coffee mug?

We haven't seen it. Why are we in Mexico? I'm very vulnerable. But we do fill out the story. Vicky is in Puerto Vallarta a third of the year. a good amount of the year. Now, coming up, we'll have a little bit of crisis,

which is the kind of opposite of deportation. Kind of like a, no, no, no, you actually have to stay. Yeah. Which is, it's funny, given what's transpiring in our home country. Right, right. Right. So it's just a little bit different. So I love Vicky.

She wants Shannon to move down there. And Shannon asks if she can bring the dogs. She says, no, absolutely not. You don't want two dogs down here. What are you talking about? And then we get a recap of what Shannon's been up to, which is basically just cleaning up. Now our mother has gone through something like this.

Our mother and Shannon Bador have a lot in common outside. Mom handles having two dog children with a little bit more grace and a little bit more composure than Chantabador. She doesn't fall over as much, though she still falls. Right. And our youngest dog, our sweet, Annie does do what, I don't know what his fucking name is, Hank. What, the house is in tatters and ruins?

What dog was on the balcony when I went over to your house? That was Bernie. Oh, that was Bernie. He bites people. He does. Not hard? Well, depends. Not hard, but it's a shepherding thing.

And this is why I'm not a dog. I don't really own dogs because when you're leaving my house, my cat doesn't try to bite your Achilles tendon. Okay. So it's just a little bit different. I love it different. We get to them getting there. That's Archie.

He wanted to know if they found the bottles under Shannon Bador's car seat. They did, Arch. He's trying to warn people. God, what are the bottles? They're plastic pink Whitney shooters. It's lemonade. No, it's vodka. Ma'am, it's pink lemonade.

vodka. It's pink lemon. Officer, it's pink lemonade. Ma'am, it has an ABV of 40%. So. I'm Shannon Bador.

You know what I just remembered? Yes. She's not getting any child support anymore, right? Because the kids are old. So does she just get, do you get alimony or spouse will support for forever? Nope. Not forever.

Well, if they were married past 10 years, maybe, but. Holy shit. Not forever. What's she going to do if she doesn't get money from David? Well, she makes $300,000. for four months of work being on this show.

So hopefully she can parlay that into something. Maybe just invest in the SpaceX. That might be the only way, Dylan. And I'm not joking. If she's paying 10 grand a month just for the house, okay? Yeah. We know her alcohol is another 11 grand a month. Right.

You blow through whatever you have pretty quickly. That salary's gone. So we take 300 grand from Bravo, maybe 500 grand. Let's be generous. She might be a million. Okay, fine. All right. If a million, I think we're okay because then she's a 12% of her yearly income.

You're right. That's okay. But, yeah, we're worried. We're worried. They get their feet rubbed by these people on the beach. They'll pay them later. I think we covered the ugly American of it all there. And we can get to dyeing scarves.

When you start off a season with scarf dying, I mean, We're in trouble, right? Yeah. There's this moment where a meatball, we're very happy because we've been wanting, I think we all ship Travis and Meatball, correct? And finally, the cubic circoneum has hit the finger. But it was a template. It was a prototype to see if she liked the shape.

There's a certain amount of secrecy that you have to go about when you're proposing to somebody you can't ask them, you know, a month leading up, hey, do you like this size? You know, it's a tell. The way that Heather Debrough speaks about this, talks, approaches this subject, and really every subject in life is nauseating and grotesque. She belittles her. And only the way that Heather can do.

Yeah. I love the ring. Mm-hmm. It's so nice and plastic and fake. Ha, ha. Heather DeBro should just live at the Kentucky Derby. because her her attitude is the fancy-hatted women at the contos. She's just such a monstrous human being.

And actually, Heather, you didn't come by all that through legal means. There's no way. Vicki brings it up. Doctors don't live in $40 million. All right. I'm going to defend the Debrose here. And you know, I hate them more than anything. That asshole gets up at four in the morning to be at the office at six.

He does 14 fucking operations today, works six days a week, comes home probably at 8 o'clock at night just to do it all over again. He's a fucking workaholic. He is Frankenstein. He is Satan. He's the meanest person on the planet earth. And he earned every fucking dime he ever made. I'm not saying that he is not a multimillionaire.

And I'm not saying that somebody that works that hard at chopping people's tits up doesn't deserve a good amount of money. This is a marketplace. There's a demand. There's a supply. You know, I'm not a communist. But he is not that wealthy. The Swan wasn't on long enough to go into syndication. What are we talking about? Can you back me up here, please? He has three offices. Right. It's very weird. This is what I'll say. He is the type of person. The difference between, it's like the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire. It's like a million seconds is like an hour or something. And a billion is like a week. It's like there's like 32 years. Yeah. There's like, or it's like, it's like, it's. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's. It's It's like really, he's a little, there's a difference between being really, really, really good at your job on TV, doing 44 pairs of tits every day. So many tips. Okay, do you know. A 10.5.

Hold on. 11, 15 million dollar house in Newport Beach, which would be insane. Right. He's building and selling 55 plus million dollar homes repeatedly. Yeah. I genuinely, that's, I don't know how many works. That's Dr. Drey money. That's not Terry DeBrow money.

Do you know how much? All right. Do you know how much money this guy pulls down probably in a month just with these operations? Remember, he has doctors working under him. So he's an umbrella. Right. Okay. So he's probably making a million dollars a week. What? Let's not, let's not attempt to, you know, project with his finances. Let's just agree to disagree, but also not because you're out flanked. You're outranked by the Democratic vote. But I work in this town and I work. with these people and I just know how much fucking money plastic surgery makes. I just want to ask a question. This is there any other plastic surgeon that lives like him? Like are there other

plastic surgeons that are that are making that kind of money? Well first off I I know people that have worked well uh who's the guy that was on um who's the guy who's this coat yeah yeah they had worked together and I just know their schedules and how crazy it is and how much they can make per

operation. Let's not get bogged up to $60,000 per operation. Let's not get bogged down in this. Okay, fine. We agree to disagree. I just disagreed with Vicki. She sounds very jealous. Tamara walks in with the posture of a fucking

gallum, some kind of rock creature. She and Erling Holland have the same kind of posture. You know what I mean? Yeah. She did something to herself and her face and her body. I don't know what it was, but it looked like she had been, like her skin had been taken off of Tamara

and put on a new camera. I'm serious. It looked like it wasn't quite. It was a Westworld kind of thing. Yes. Thank you. Yeah. Do you agree?

Yeah, really, really scary. She's in a new form every season, but, but, but, but the, the corrosive center is still there and unchanged and unmoved regardless of the hour spent on the couch, which evidently is no longer transpiring because she has finally arrived at a place where she loves herself. Right. Now, Heather DeBrow brought some goodies. The goodies are a crudite from Ralph's. From Ralph's.

Isn't it funny, the wealthy, well, her can still be a little trash. I actually think they just pulled that off the production staff's catering table and threw it over there so they could have something. But, but, and I, again, this is insignificant, but I think it speaks to, why was it? Because I agree, this, this was a, a horrible first setup. So you have the package that starts the season.

Why was it Heather's, though? Why did they have to say, it was almost like they were in, because she's been a TikToker. This is TikToky. Sorry. No, no, no, no, no. I'm talking about the crude today. I'm talking about the vegetable platter.

Why was it Heather's? Why did it belong to Heather? Why did the person at the scarf dying place that was TikToky say that was Heather's? Because Heather invited them, Dylan. It was Heather's, it was Heather's scarf dying day. Okay. And I would venture to say, when everybody else goes to scarfdyingstudios.com forward slash dire scarves, they don't bring crudet tape ladders. It was just her. So Tamara is here to blow things up. She said that in a heated interview with Jeff. What's his name? Jeff Lewis. Jeff Lewis. I want to talk about Jeff. Okay. Okay. Jeff Lewis, I used to be a huge fan of flipping out.

started he some could argue there were like three shows that were the pillars of bravo the housewives franchise of course below deck came a little bit later top chef top chef top chef was pretty important to bravo in the early days i think that was a little bit later that was like a below deck introduction time i think this was flipping out was before to me okay yeah like 2009 it made you go there and watch this was when bravo would do the uh the the the the reunions it would be andy sitting with jeff lewis in a room asking him questions as the reunion. It was very odd stuff. Was Vanderpump around this time or later?

Vanderpump rules came in 2013. Okay. But housewife, certainly. Yeah. But anyway, Jeff was there early on. So, but this guy who I loved was always a good businessman, super smart, but also condescending, mean, very critical, kind of a jerk. Yeah.

And it was always very, very funny for a number of years. And then you realize as the years go on that that wasn't just a small part of his character. It was 90% part of his character. And 10 years on, you realize like, oh, this guy has 30 years of relationships where 90% of the people that have interacted with him hate his fucking guts. You know, to me it was over when Zoyla was as mistreated as she was. Oh.

And that's when... Or Gage or Jenny Lewis or 40 past employees. Uh-huh. at some point you got to look at this guy and go oh he's Satan yeah and now what he does on his radio show where he did to brandy and uh whatever Julie he unearths with no shamer and he did to fucking heather I mean he's a fucking jackass yeah fuck you yeah well on that podcast you have any thoughts on that no no no no okay all good over there on the texts oh yeah Dylan was right uh top chef actually came around in 2006 and flipping out was 07.

Nice still. Which is just kind of crazy to me. Thanks. I also love the workout, which was a personal trainer show. Nobody fucking knows what that is. People did watch that back then. And then Rachel, uh, Rachel Zoe, she had Taylor on, which then had Brad on. Zohmeister, the Zohmeister.

And have you stolen her house? Yes, I have. I'm calling from inside. Uh, so Tamra. said that she was going to arrive at season 20 to tear shit up and that everyone on that cast betrayed her and she was going to make them rue the day they did that. Now when Heather and Meekball ask her about those quotes she goes, it was just a joke. There are certain lies that you can't pull off. There are certain lies that are so egregious that everyone is made uncomfortable

and we just decide to move on. Just what I think the girls are. do because she said it with such vitriol and such hatred that it couldn't possibly be a joke. By the way, when has Tamara not shown up to a season and not been... With that stated goal? That's, yeah, exactly. I thought you were going to say, by the way, when has Tamara told a joke? Yeah, that's a really good question. So I love Heather's response to Tamara saying, you guys all took a group photo without me.

It was really, really hurtful. And Heather just said, I was completely self-absorbed. I was only concerned with how I looked in the photo. Can you blame me? I mean, this is our job. And Tamara goes, you know what? I actually get that. So we make amends very quickly, and we talk about the incident at the Not So Quiet Woman.

Have you ever been there, Ruby? No, have you? We should go there. I would love to. Fine, Pat and I will go. You don't have to go. I want to drive to the city of Orange for. It's disgusting.

No, it's not. Orange County. You don't have to come, Dylan. Mm-hmm. Mr. Poopi Pence. But so we haven't seen this. This ultimate girl's trip has not come out yet, right? No, we have the screener in our thing if we want to see it.

Wow. This is the type of thing that is, I don't know how in your 50s, you do this in public multiple times where you live in a very small community and get up in the morning and show your face. I don't know. Yeah. It's like doing something in a college dorm at a small liberal arts school. But worse.

So here's the breakdown in the game film. We learned that Tamrat calls. called Shannon Biddler, a fucking drunk, said you can't get a dude. You're homeless now, you lose her. And then there was some other mean stuff, I think, you're poor or whatever. And then Heather DeRoe says, she was appalled by this behavior. Yeah, she's always appalled. Here's my question. And I, forgive me for being poopy. I think some of the audience will like it. Some people won't. I apologize. it's just the stasis that I'm in when I watch the show. But I'll not be gaslit.

Orange County is filled with strip malls, raised trucks, and tracked homes, and car dealerships. What are we talking about? My other question that is a little poopy is... Don't forget, stay. houses with neon signs. Exactly. What are we, it's like a, honestly, it's like a, it's like a less hot reto to be. Maybe it's not that bad. But, um, what are we doing picking up the cameras and filming the same women that no one wants on this show on a new show called Ultimate Girls Trip? Ultimate Girl's Trip. There's only two women from Orange County on that. Okay. It's all the franchises. Yeah. So the best part

about it is I believe like while this exchange is making place. Yeah, like, Giselle from Protone. is like, what the fuck is wrong with you guys? There are people there hopefully watching it saying, oh my God. Might as well jump. You might as well jump. A poopie do. I'll kill you. I'll kill you.

I'll fucking kill you. No, no, no. Might as well jump. You know what's funny about Luann? Yeah. Is that I don't think she understands that she's the joke. Like hundreds, possibly thousands. and people show up to hear her sing.

And it's because she's horrible. I'd sing. Right. She is not, she is not in a place to accept that she is anything other than a star. Right. So she won't.

She's like the room. Yes. Yeah. Sure. You're a shining star. Shunning bright tonight. Ha ha! Whoa.

He. Ha ha. Hey. You feeling it tonight. All right. All right. So, um, I fucked a pirate. Yeah, they do get into a fight and call each other a lonely hag and a drunk bitch.

So, um, we'll see how they get on. Should we get back to Shannon and Vickie? Let's go to Mexico. Shut up an arm. Um, we have a knee wrap situation with Vicki. She can't walk. She's hobbled. And her knee dislocates, um, which is, I thought a condition.

that only affected athletes and horse girls with roly backpacks in junior high. But evidently, and that's foolish of me because obviously they happen to the elderly as well. So her knee keeps slipping. She needs a wrap and they're headed to a margarita spot where they parade around a donkey inside and the women say that the donkey is not abused. This is such an out of sight, out of mind, ugly American thing to do, traffic, one of these places where an animal is paraded around inside. Well, lucky for everyone, it's not in America.

It's in Mexico. No, I know that, yeah, I'm saying it's, yeah. It's not a margarita place, Dylan. It's Andalas, okay? And Vicki said, I put you on the map. I would like to invest. And the owner said, we don't want you here at all. Don't come back.

If there was a way for us to make you not come here, we would do it. We just haven't figured out how because you're here all the time. And also the Mexican government will let you leave. now. So shit. We're stuck with you. Great. Right. All right. So this is Vicki's perfect spot. This is where, this is like an old person's home where they still let old people feel

cool. You know what I mean? And I'm sure the locals are happy to have her money. So they make her feel special. Yeah, it's like boom box night at a hospice ward. But she's the youngest one by like 12 years. And she loves it. She's never missed one. No. No, no, no.

Now, her new boyfriend's Michael. He's been around for four years. And he fills her love tank. Now this is a famous line for many, many, many years ago, almost OG, because Dawn did not fill her love tank. But finally someone is doing it, not pretending to have cancer or use her money to fund a run for the governorship. Love tank sounds like a white snake song. That is gross. Vicki loves white snake. Yikes. Hey, everyone. We are Bad TV and we are sponsored

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Row. com slash safety for box warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications. Losing weight is hard. Make it easier with Roe. Okay, so let's get to Jen and Emily. Pat, you want to talk about pandas? Oh, sure.

Emily is healthier now because Luke's eating French fries. and after throwing pills down his throat using lasers on him and grafting her anxiety on him for a couple years. It turns out he just didn't like the school he was attending. So he's all better now. I know. Now, I, you asked. I really do envy your blasé fair attitude with the many things that could harm or hinder your child's future because I'm racked with anxiety about it. This, I think, actually might be a bigger issue than you are letting on.

I think you're right, Dole. Yeah, I think he might have some serious problems that could trouble a parent and you being blessed with two beautiful, healthy children. While Prison Baby does punch Mommy in the face, he's not quite Luke. I think Luke's really going through it. Yeah. It probably doesn't help that Mommy's like telling people openly that Shane's not the love of her life. I wonder what's really happening when the cameras aren't there. Yeah, yeah.

Or it could possibly be. How could he be? Good cue. If I'm being honest, very, very. good cue. Yeah. Here's another thing that all cast. Hey, Kay.

Horribly as a non-parent. I don't think this is good. And I think that the more disturbing part was the scene with her daughter later. I was like, this has got to get, dare I say, maybe we go to the gym and actual therapy. Maybe. And I also am the parent. And I could be wrong. So that's what I think about her.

Hey, sweetie, you want lunch? Get the fuck out of my room. I'm so blown away with with gym parents. Like I'm not saying I go do it. Take your classes a couple times a week. Go to the gym every day for for an, I don't know how you, I guess people just prioritize it and you just do it.

If you have kids in school, I get it, but like Danny Bucco having fucking four kids under one year old and you have newborns and everyone is breastfeeding and fighting for their lives. Is his name Bucco? What is it? Bucco. I don't know.

Faco. I don't know. It's probably fuck-o. Yeah, Danny Fucko needs to put the fucking dumbbells down. But also not to talk about a woman's body because we would never do that here. She looks so good. She looks incredible. It's insane.

Okay. Pat, shut up. She looks incredible. Pat is doing the haunted mansion at Disneyland eyes. Okay. And now it's even worse. He's, uh, no, I'm not.

He wants to cry. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like Emily's body makes him want to cry, which is crazy because she looks absolutely fucking gorgeous. A quick thing from this little luncheon, Grayson got caught speeding at 105 miles an hour. Now I am a $700 ticket. And by the way, what that's going to do is insurance. And right there, that's the wonders of California for you. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mistakes are really punished. Not for like, I don't know, the people that don't nestley or anything, but for us.

Oh, I was going to say people that, um, yeah, breaking your house. Yeah. Kick down your door. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's a good, it's a good, uh, the top and bottom. Go Scott Free on a lot of stuff. That's what I'm saying. It's us, uh, you know, filthy yucky normies in the middle. We really paid the price. Right, right, right. Like, uh, hey, officer, I had someone riding my ass. I got scared. I started driving 118 miles an hour. What's a big deal? Sure. I have a fast car and I'm 17 years old. It's not a big deal. I wonder if this is, didn't she get Doss in the Mustang? I wonder if this is the little brother driving the Mustang. And when she said that it was so out of character for him to speed that it shook her to her core, I really had a how to think. And I said, wow, I don't know that you know him that well, right? Oh, definitely. A parent getting a child a really nice car for their first car is crazy. Is dumb. A parent getting a muster. for a child's first car? I don't, well, a Mustang is a nice car.

It's not an Audi, you know, A7 or whatever. But, um, my God. Just the, the decisions coming out. What did Lynn Curtin do to our kids? One of them's got like two fingers left and lives in fucking Lancaster now. Yeah, that was a pretty sad. To be fair, like when the police show up at your house and they say, where are your parents? You're, you need to get out.

You're being evicted because your dad has been lying. you're probably pretty scarred from that. I don't know who Lynn Curtin is, but we've cut back and forth from Shannon and Emily and Shannon, or Jan and Emily and Shannon and Vicki, who is impaired. Shannon says that Tamara is evidently

done with therapy and loves who she is. And Vicki says, what are you talking about? She loves sushi. Now, it's, how do we feel about that line? How do we feel about Vicki's role on the show, the zany?

I'm happy to have, Vicky back. I just, it's several of the other cast members are problematic for me. All right. Vicki always brings it. She chooses men that hate her and want to use her for her money. That's what I'm saying.

Her children are losers. Yeah. That she floats their entire lives. Right. And yet she's so proud of them. Uh-huh. And so her life is fun to watch. The others,

I know nothing about what's really taking place in, for example, Emily's life. She will throw out the panda thing. We know what's going on in Emily's life. No, we don't. Not really. She's working out. She's getting protein style. She's coming home and she's getting banged from behind with a lean cuisine on her lower back. Fair enough.

We get to another bad parent in Tamara. Her darling, Sophia, or whatever that child's name is, is completing her GED in Orange County. Okay. I want to give it up to this kid. She foregoed going to the Musicians Institute. Yeah, but also, what are we doing? I don't want to sound like a coastal leader, a privileged little shit. I know there are lots of people that need to complete GEDs. High school didn't work out.

Sophia doesn't strike me as a person who would not be able to complete high school ever. I don't know why she's completing a GED. You know what I'm saying? I do. Are you aware of what I'm saying? I'm completely aware. I am not sure. I don't know if this was like a continuing education type of thing.

I'm not sure. But she feels as though she could take that test and pass it with flying colors now. Uh-huh. Not Tamara, Sophia. Darya. Yeah. Okay. Well, she didn't go.

And Emily and Jen have children who are growing up. So let's get to Bador. Really quickly. Can I? Yes. When she gets the pink paint on her sweatshirt. And again, perhaps I am too close with my mother and I don't want to have girls because I didn't do this as a child.

I wasn't like a cunt bitch to my mom. We didn't do that phase. Right. When your mom says things to you like you're a disaster because she thinks it's funny and she doesn't have the ability to regulate what comes out of her mouth and repeatedly is not paying attention to what you are wanting or doing. I don't know that it breeds the best stuff in the world. Healthy children. And just good stuff, you know, maybe it's something else. That's all. Well, I'm going to say Emily's life and her family continue to be reality TV death.

And then Jen should go to parent jail for mentioning that her and her daughter struggle to insert tampons in her. That's really inappropriate. Well, but also another reason for jail. Sorry, Dill. She says, we fought about how to put a tampon in 10 times. Yeah. There's one way and how.

I know. How can you fight about that? Because it's one way in, one way out, right? And we're obviously being hyperbolic about how many times they're. They fought about it, but how do we even get to the likely number, which is four? Right. Right. How are we fighting about it that much?

Like Ruby said one way in, one way out. All right. So we get to Bador. Okay. Can I take this one? Please. All right. So she's called Stella many times.

It's always on face it. Stella's not in town. She's in Paris wrapping up whatever, whatever education she's going to do. Her voice, I'm referring to Stella. Let's just say the apple doesn't fall far from the drunken tree. her voice always sounds like she's been smoking all night and drinking at a club till four in the morning. She's not having a lot of good times. Yeah.

The good news is she's got a degree in, what is it? Hospitality. That's right, which will qualify her to work either front desk at a fucking shitty hotel or be a fucking waitress. It's a useless degree. She could work in Three Michelin dining, but she'll, I think, quickly get disillusioned with the amount of work that goes into it and the amount of stress and level of excellence. but who knows, maybe she's going to do well. I want to zero in on her mother who, you know, I know Dead Horse, we spoke about it,

but Shannon Madure sees a display on a lawn with a sign that says no dogs. Now, this is my problem with this kind of dog person. So that sign was put there, and it means all dogs. every single dog you could imagine is not allowed on that line in front of the, on that lawn in front of that display. Now, the thing with these kinds of dog people is these kinds of dog people, they see these signs all over the world.

They see them everywhere. And these signs hit their frontal or whatever part of the brain they hit, and they get contorted to mean that sign is talking about. about every other dog, but not Archie and not hanky-poo. Troy. Troy. It makes me so unbelievably upset and you walk around. Yeah, it's disgusting.

That's Archie, by the way. You know how, this is when Shannon said that Archie hated Troy. Archie said that it was kind of true, and Archie asked Troy to kill him. Wow. Do you think that's how he passed? That's how he did. He said Troy, kill me. That's true.

Troy, he did. He killed him. Wow. That's a beautiful story of brothers. Yeah. Do you think it was like a Dostoevsky kind of killing? Or do you think he was just kind of like, Hodor? And he was like, okay.

And then just ripped his throat out. He ripped his throat out. Yeah, definitely. And Shannon came home to it. So there are these moray breaks in the world that just, it makes me want to turn into a homerabi kind of dictator and actually be omniscient in everywhere. So if I see someone, let's say, at a Starbucks in Tarzana at 8 o'clock in the morning, ordering a grasshopper

matcha milkshake when there are seven people behind them, I go, actually, no, you're dead. Right. Right? Right. Because, and then I go to Starbucks and I go, it's illegal to have this on the menu. We cannot be trusted with this. It's, it's hurting too many people. These signs don't do enough. We need to put those things that they place on the outside of embassies, those ballistic charges with all those little pebbles. We should be putting them all over the place.

So that if people have dogs, they're actually, I'm not saying the dogs get hit, just the people. Del, I've been thinking about this a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, when I'm on the freeway and I see all of us as human beings driving around, I'm like, wow, there's like seven or eight billion of us on this planet.

And for the most part, we all don't kill each other. I know. I'm like, wow, that speaks volumes for us as a species. It really, really is. And the things that hold us together are the no dog signs. The things that hold us together. The people who do this are the types of people who look at a line on the freeway when you're merging.

Everyone's in that line because you know that's the lane you have to get into. They say, but it's not for me because this lane that I'm in is the one that's going to go straight at 40 miles an hour. So I'm going to get to the front of the stopped lane, hold up everyone behind me, and then wait until they let me in because that lane is for everyone except me. And it's often, it's often this thing where it's like, oh, I, well, I didn't, I didn't say, pay attention, though. That's not an alibi. You are sentenced to the leper island. Thank you, Mr. Homorabi.

Thank you. Okay. So she walks into this goddamn fucking place, gets their dogs a puppy cone, and we move on with our lives. Back in Mexico. Vicky is going to be the opposite of deported. She is going to be on country arrest. She is to remain in Mexico. I don't know what the production was thinking when they were like, I wonder if Andy got the phone call.

Vicky can't film. She's fucking, she's sequestered in Mexico. She can't film. was what, I want to know what production call was made. That was like, all right, the answer to this is to send bumbling badoor down to film with her. Right. And Billy. What?

Also, Billy. We didn't really talk about Billy, did we? Well, we are now. He definitely is getting hand jobs. He was at that massage parlor. Yeah. Oh. There's no doubt in my mind that he was at that massage parlor.

And he goes frequently, three times a week, probably four. Oh, yeah. hand drops. He's, I think he's getting his legs peeled back. I don't think he can. I think so. I don't think he can physically, yeah.

They have straps. Maybe. Maybe. I think there's a whole package there though that he likes to. Anyways, I didn't need to do that. Let's get to, meatballs place. Yes.

Which I don't want to go there. Again, we, we, I think I speak for all of us when we, When we hear about the success of the gated group and we see this family eating Jimmy Johns, we're nothing but ecstatic for me, Paul. She's a sweet bird who's been through so much. Her husband almost killed her and broke into her house one night. She's dealing with this crazy ex.

She's really been through the ringer. But there are lots of sweet people that I don't want to see on my TV. They're boring. They're filthy yucky, yucky normies. They add nothing. There's, quite honestly, they detract from the show. When they come on, I'm like, oh my God. There's like chapters and books when you get to, books that are written like character-wise.

And you get, and you're like, oh, fuck this fucking couple again. Like, I don't even want to read the chapter. Whatever happens here, I will put together later in context clues. I'm skipping the whole thing, but you can. You can't do that here because it's not a book. Are you talking about like a fourth wing kind of thing? Yeah. Yeah.

Like when it's just chapters are broken down by characters and you don't like the characters, it gets very hard to be like, I know where we're going. I've never read Fourth Wing. I hear it's great, though. By the way, and just, but I'm sure it's way more interesting than discussing whether or not Meatball will take his last name. Dragons are always more interesting than really anything that could happen in Orange County. But is Gene going to take Travis's last name?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think that she's not? No. They're still discussing it. But I'm sure we'll have more conversations. Yeah, we'll figure it out. let's get to Heather and her bitch mother. Oh.

Heather tells her mother that she loves her, but that she is a little bummed out that she didn't make more of an effort to spend time with their family. Now, I had said this, uh, hinted at this in a previous podcast. This is more and more of this,

which is people are getting older and they're now hashing out their childhoods or whatever with their elderly parents. I do not think this is a good thing. Mom, you're 85. You'll be dead soon. But let me tell you why I have issues with you. I don't know the point of it. It's an endeavor that I think if you want to attempt to come to some kind of reconciliation, go for it if it's bad enough.

But, you know, for Ruby and My's generation and yours, talking to boomers about mistakes they made in the past is I don't really think it's going to. to ever go over that well? No, it'll be a waste of both people's time, but mostly yours, because they checked out immediately, right? Like, you were having a conversation with the wall. They were thinking about, like, they had plans to run through. So they actually were very productive during that hour. You wasted it.

And this is the wall that Heather is running into, that is her mother. I will say it was kind of, it was like she was playing squash. It was just coming right back. She said, you feel guilty. And her mom said, I certainly will not. Right, right. And Heather was like, I, I've, I've endured a lot of pain because of what you have, have done in the past. And she thought, I'm running low on dates. I forgot that I need to add dates to the grocery list. Yep. That's the type of relationship that this. And again, also,

can I say something? I don't think Heather does feel that way. I think Heather was perfectly happy to move 3,000 miles away from her very waspy parents to a very rich person's, he was already a plastic surgeon. Yeah. I think she was good, not going to the Hamptons with that and saying. The dad moved to Europe. Right.

They moved to the fucking Netherlands. That's some money right there. When she said, he retired the year that the twins were born. Her mom was like, no, he didn't. She was like, yes, he did. She was like, well, Heather,

you had your own. So they were actually never working one time. When she had all four kids, it's crazy. I love that. There was a little joke about ashes. You know, when you get put in and earn. Personal story.

My mom's brother, Barry, I actually liked Barry. He's a nice guy. We lost his ashes. We don't know where my uncle's ashes are either. That kind of thing can happen. Barry will show up on an episode of American Pickers one day. Don't know where they are. We think they got thrown in the trash.

It's a they. I didn't expect that. He's a they. He's a they. Well, I mean, they're ashes. Okay. let's get to another one of Heather's parties. Oh, so tacky.

These things are so tacky. The only thing tackier than the party is her going. The party's great. The only negative drawback is the, uh, the price. That's the only thing tackier. What is? What did you think about her wheeling out, her fucking son?

Oh. As though he was, he was a magic trick to, perform. I felt this was like watching an uncanny valley something to me. I was very, this was weird. He referred to himself as Heather's incredibly good looking son. I think she told him to say that. I'm not kidding. I think she told him to Dylan. Okay. He's a good looking kid. I said it. Not good looking enough to say that out loud. My wife was, uh, I know I would go, oh, look at this good looking kid. She was like, eh. She was annoyed too. Yeah. She did not like it. But don't you think

that that's something that has. Heather would be like, you know, you should sign, I think that he, and he was like, wow, you're right, I should. These are the types of things that earlier in the episode when Emily was like, you know, actually, who I go to for herringing advice, it's Heather. She gives flawless advice. Yeah. Sure.

Good. Yeah, you keep going there. Let's talk about the girl from Cleveland, Carmella. Mm-hmm. She lived at the Playboy Mansion's guest house. She did not have sex with you, Hefner, which is. a blessing and a curse because had she... She could write books about it.

She could write books about it. She probably would have gotten further ahead in her career. But when you have sex with you, Hefner, you run the risk of a goldfish being introduced, a German shepherd. Unholy things can happen. So I think it's probably best that Carmela didn't. But she does seem like a real firecracker.

She's going to start some shit. And we need one of these. Katie was an epic failure, compulsive liar. and not good at it. Hopefully Carmella will bring it. And I hope she takes Heather to bro down or gives her some shit this season.

I hate her on her goddamn high horse. Tamara arrives and the fact that they can just get together and be, this is where Orange County kind of falls apart. It's so clear that these women haven't seen each other in the majority of a year. They, the better part of a year,

they get together. And they're going to pretend that they're friends. They're going to pretend like they're friends, even though they hate each other. It's just like, pick a lane. Let's either go bad girls club or let's get some people who are actually friends. It's also hard to come off the heels of Rhode Island when everyone is so integrated into each other's lives. And then these people are, aside from screaming at each other at the quiet woman and calling

everyone fat and drunk and poor, you guys haven't liaised in any way, shape, or form in nine months. Right. Yeah. There's something interesting going on with Vicky, though, because Vickie, though, because Vicky does see herself as the creator of the Bravo network. And she says it multiple times. And I did appreciate that.

And by the way, Emily and Meatball are sick of fans of Vicky. And Carmela, like, whether or not she watches the show or not, is like, I'm not kneeling to her, her queen. Like, I don't give a fuck. So that's going to make for some good TV. Yeah, I love that. And also the fact that she's like, she's a hot, she's a haughty. Vicky's, you know, Vicky doesn't like people that are younger and more attractive. No, it bothers her.

Now, let's talk about Vicki's accusation that Heather inherited money. I feel like we covered this. I would just have one question. If a parent dies and the mother is still alive, that doesn't mean that they can't inherit money, correct? No, but why would the mother give any of that money away? No, you'd keep it because you could live a very long life. No, the money would never go to the younger people yet. I don't think that's true.

I think a lot of people might be like, listen, I have 100. 20 for you, 20 for you, when I kick it, good. Mom, spend yours how you want. Kids spend yours how you want. Yeah. What I would say is I think it's absolute and complete and utter bullshit that they have not had assistance from at least Heather's parents. I do not know Terry's parental background at all.

It's insane to me thinking, and even if they didn't give you money for this life that you have led. They were able to put you into the most expensive schools or whatever. So shut up, Heather. Okay. So I talked to Mark Garagos, famous attorney. He represents all the most reprehensible human beings on planet Earth. Sure.

His dad was a lawyer. Of course, he bank rolls his law school, starts him off with a firm. Of course, gives him a leg up on everything. I could see, fine, if you want to say that, but to say like that he gave him 10 million bucks or something like that, I don't think that happened. I agree with you there. but I think people, that actually is a perfect way to put it. People who do exactly that and then act like they are self-made,

make me fucking, I hate you. You are not, you are not anything that wasn't handed to you. I, not to be rude. Terry is obviously very good at his job. Cheers. Heather. What do you do? Where have you, 1994?

Like, I will talk about your IMD. I don't really need to because you have more. She did a three-episode arc on Malibu Country in 2018. You're right. What was she doing in 1994? She had a show in 2000. I forget what the show was called, though. It lasted one season.

Days of our lives. Okay. And I think she did get money from her dad. Okay, so Heather grabs the mic, introduces, welcomes everybody to this circus act, and jello shots lead to the, Woohoo! I have two things to say.

Yeah. when we these moments i appreciated and i didn't appreciate a lot about this watching vicky have to have her boyfriend's daughter put a sanitary napkin on her exploded cysts that was just like that to me is karma in ways that we like pat was saying the other day like bad people will get theirs okay yeah shannon having to shimmy into her dress on camera it like these are moments where I forget that the last 31 minutes were frustrating, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because, but, yeah, okay, it's a 54 minute episode.

I guess we can keep the cyst thing. We can also not keep it. You're right. Right. So we wrap things up with Tamara starting in with her shit. episode one and she's already beginning with the littlest finger shit it's not even good it works here she goes up to vicky and she tells her that Heather was giving Tamara shit for being friends with Vicky. And I'll defend Heather Debrough here. She didn't give her shit. She was just kind of

confused about the particularly toxic nature of their friendship. She wasn't saying how dare you be friends with her. She was just going, you guys blow up with each other a lot. I don't know how you guys are friends. And Tamara turned that for motivations unknown into just a complete lie meant to attempt to submerge Heather Debrough in Vicki's eyes. She's an agent of chaos. Yes. And also the idea that Jen had told Tamara that Heather Debrough actually talks a lot of shit about you too. Don't forget that.

Jen, you're too sweet, too nice. I know. Don't you dare. Don't come for her. I'm scared of what she could do to you. Seriously. Just keep your paws off. I put, I didn't say that.

I said that I put Tamara in a box. What does that even mean? This is the issue. We're going to find our. ourselves at multiple points throughout this season, having spent three to four episodes on an argument that no one knows what it's about and no one knows how it started. As I made a point with our guest, Lori, Alterman yesterday. The wonderful thing about Rhode Island was there was a through line of a marriage that was horrible and cheating. Yes. Through 10 episodes. And then every single

episode had a new argument or beef or gripe and it just kept a moving. We will spend the in the box storyline we'll we'll we'll push that through three episodes on this any good season of television you can see it in the writer's room there's an a storyline there's a b storyline a c storyline and a d this is just has rockets flying all over the place so we'll see what happens uh let us stick with us if you're excited about this season of real housewives of orange county really really let your freak flag fly in the comments what are you thinking about these women what are you thinking about season 20. We love you very much.

I'm Dylan saying goodbye, Pat, say goodbye. Bye, guys. And Ruby. Bye, bye.