Answer Me This! - AMT254: Space Food, Artex and Goat Lungs

Episode Date: April 25, 2013

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If the secret service is secret, how come we know about it? Answer me this, answer me this. If there was a ban on flouting, how would you flout it? Answer me this, answer me this. Helen and Ollie, answer me this. Well, we're starting with two of the things we care about most in this world, sport and Canada. Because it's a question from Joanna, who says i am a canadian and i've got a sports question is it about the poutine olympics i don't think so she says a few years ago i spent

some time on your side of the pond and first encountered a sport called netball which i'd never heard of before it seems to be some sort of mash-up between basketball and volleyball well there's no volleyball in it and it's like basketball with all the energy taken out. But she says it is obviously important enough that over there in the UK you even teach it in school gym classes. Yes, 13 years of this wretched ball sport.

But only if you're a girl. If you're a boy. You get to play real sports. You get to play real sports. Even more surprising to me, continues Joanna, than its apparent popularity over there was its complete lack of a presence over here, Canada, whatsoever. Well, you've got hockey. Helen, answer me this. How did such a goofy-sounding sport become so popular? Because it was forced on all of us at school.

And why didn't it take in my part of the world? Well, it's a curious one, Joanna, because you're very close to the United States where they invented netball to be a more ladylike and restrained version of basketball. So the reason why netball is so crap, and I'm sorry, listeners, but I don't care if you write and go, no, netball's brilliant because I hate it because I played at school. It's crap because you're only allowed to go into certain portions of the court. You can't go to the full court. You're not allowed to move with the ball. You're not allowed to dribble like you can in basketball. You're not allowed to punch each other in the face like you presumably are in volleyball you just stand there with a bib

on and it's rubbish and what was the thinking behind that being more ladylike because you can't move you can't flash your pants obviously i used to play it in floor-length crinolines in the 1890s when it was developed in this way uh by a lady called sender berenson abbott of smith college she adapted girls basketball which had already started off a bit with rules that maintained in this way by a lady called Senda Berenson Abbott of Smith College. She adapted girls' basketball, which had already started off a bit, with rules that maintained

feminine decorum and slowed down potentially strenuous play. It avoided physical contact. There was very limited opportunity for violence or brawls or injury because you're not able

to touch each other. Hello, it's Steve from Birmingham. I got married two weeks ago and as a wedding present to myself, I thought the first 60 episodes of Answer Me This and the Diamond Jubilee and the Sports Day albums

to complete my collection. Helen and Ollie, Answer Me This, how do I justify it to the wife? I suppose many people's marriages are just an endless stream of justifying the unjustifiable, aren't they? Couldn't you just tell her you spent 60 quid on porn? Well, I think in the scheme, the grand scheme of what you spend in a marriage. Yeah, and the wedding itself.

But I mean, never mind the honeymoon. If I'm going to spend £150 on sugar almonds, I can at least get all the episodes of my favourite podcast. Exactly. Money on quality entertainment such as ours is certainly worth it. She will have spent more on the wedding day getting her makeup done, which she was only going to weep off anyway during the vow, than you've spent on entertainment for a lifetime. Yes.

I must say, I fully appreciate the idea of buying yourself wedding presents. Martin and I on honeymoon got ourselves a giant toy ham. Well, the thing is, no one knows oneself better than one and it is difficult giving people digital files as a gift yes yes exactly we never actually thought about doing a wedding list option on our website oh my god that'd be amazing john lewis rake it in domain have we got enough diversity of merch to really sustain a full wedding list well you could wear one of the bibs as a veil it'd be enchanting i've got a better idea let's get ourselves ordained and then we can perform weddings.

Sit down guests. In half an hour we'll get to the wedding but first got to do a bit of banter. But being realistic about a marriage. You know it's not just

about the honeymoon is it? There's going to be a few weeks maybe a few months maybe a few years maybe a few decades where you're that couple. You're that couple

sitting in the restaurant not saying anything to each other. At that point when your marriage has got to that stage maybe you don't hate each other maybe you're just used to each other exactly is this sentence going to end with why not buy some episodes of antony this to spice up your love life why not fill the time by wearing some earphones and listening

to us yeah now we've heard from uh joe in seattle quite recently yeah can't get a second date yeah he's been in touch with his romantic woes before oh what a loser joe but i'm guessing that his uh love life is going a little better oh good because he says ollie answer me this sharing a nice cream cone with someone you're romantically involved with is that charming or gross or both yes because it might be charming to you it might be gross to passers-by or gross to the person you're trying to share it with indeed i think also it might depend on how new your relationship is because it's the kind of thing that is gross when you've only been on like one date with someone then it's not gross it's creepy it's too much it's too much too soon then there might be that early honeymoon period like where

you're really into each other and you can't get close enough and then why would i eat without swapping fluid with eight exactly what a waste uh and then um later you realize the validity of separating your ice creams you might not even want the same flavor but you understand that that's fine in the relationship it's okay to have differences I think it's a matter of degree as well if it's like I can have a little try of your cone that's fine but if it's like trying is different if you're simultaneously tonguing the same cane that's yeah yeah that's great that's interesting as well isn't it because the very thing that makes it sort of fun and acceptable the flirtatious lick that's the thing that makes

it sort of amusing oh yeah it's also the thing that makes it disgusting if you're both like eat pasta not ice cream or soup it'd be so romantic wouldn't it or porridge i've shared a suit with someone and did they come off worse in that deal? Yeah, because I'm faster at eating Did you both put in a big straw into the soup? You wouldn't share a soup with someone Who you weren't romantically attached with But you might share an ice cream cone I think One might eat half and then the other the other half

You would be licking simultaneously But I wouldn't share a soup with Even though you could do the same thing My platonic friend could eat half of the soup And then I could eat the other half. Well, no one wants the bathwater second, do they? I'd share my soup with a... Not with Ollie, though, would you?

No, not with Ollie. I wouldn't get a look in. Ollie's an only child. He doesn't share food. Here's a question from Daniel from Crystal Palace, who says, I'm currently undergoing an orthodontic procedure. This procedure involves applying pressure to the teeth

using wire and minute elastic bands that agonisingly force the teeth into position. Drama queen match. So Ollie asked me this. What sadist thought up the idea of braces? Surely there's a less painful way

to do it. Well, presumably being anaesthetised for several years while they train your teeth back into position, but it's not practical. It'll have other side effects. Yes.

It's very hard to pinpoint a particular sadist because, of course, there are a long line of sadists or as they prefer to be called, dentists. position but it's not practical it'll have other side effects yes uh it's very hard to pinpoint a particular sadist because of course there were a long line of sadists or as they prefer to be called dentists yeah who contributed to the evolution of braces technology as we know it today they're just trying to help you daniel uh so as long ago as 1728 there was a dentist called pierre fouchard how did he get in on the braces app was it him who said if you wear this say leather strap or wooden brace in your mouth for X months, your teeth will grow incorrectly?

Was that his shtick? I think the one that you have to blame for all of the weird little funny additions is probably Calvin S. Case, who was the dentist who made them really hilarious because he was the one to add little rubber bands to braces. The colourful bits. Whenabouts was that? That was in the 20th century, I believe. But actually, archaeologists have discovered ancient bodies with bands wrapped

around their teeth really uh although that may have been apparently to stop their teeth getting separated in the afterlife of course also i thought there was quite a big trade on teeth so presumably the teeth of corpses were often nicked yeah i suppose just putting a band around them was just like a little reminder to grave robbers be like hold on you sure you want to do this oh i better not go on the grass there's a sign i'm sure that band would work but anyway daniel i think you should be grateful to the pain because the pain is nature's way of telling you that your teeth are being forced into a position that others consider superior and maybe medically superior because some people's teeth are growing in the wrong place i think also if

they had less painful ways to do it they would use them but it's a slow process uh making teeth grow in the right way and i think the surgical options are not going to they had less painful ways to do it, they would use them. But it's a slow process, making teeth grow in the right way. And I think the surgical options are not going to be any less painful. I suppose the worst thing about braces that I've read is apparently sometimes the wire can fall out the back of them and spike through your cheek. So that's a good, good reason to not eat toffee when you've got braces. Yeah, there are lots of things that I'd imagine are quite difficult to do when you do have braces. And also, remember, my friend used to twang his elastic bands tunefully. when you've got braces. Yeah, there are lots of things that I'd imagine are quite difficult to do when you do have braces. And also, remember my friend used to twang his elastic bands tunefully. It's not a nice tune, is it,

when you're thinking about where it's coming from? Have you ever heard of a sexual fetish involving braces? I haven't looked into one because I don't find braces attractive on their own in that way and I've never had braces, so I've never been sought by somebody with that fetish. So I'm not the right person to ask. But as an instrument of both medicine and restriction and which does something to your mouth yeah you'd imagine that someone somewhere has found a sexual use for those no

could really shred your foreskin if you're not careful if you've got a question then email your question yeah to answer to AnswerMeAtThisPodcast at GoogleMail.com. AnswerMeAtThisPodcast at GoogleMail.com. AnswerMeAtThisPodcast at GoogleMail.com. AnswerMeAtThisPodcast at to Googlemail.com entered the meatball, but who? On Wednesday, the iconic British car that ripped off an iconic American car. On Thursday, how American airlines invented air miles. And on Friday, the UFO sighting that gripped

colonial America. We discuss this and more on Today in History with The Retrospectors. Ten minutes each weekday, wherever you get your podcasts. Here's a question from Liam from Pimlico, who says, tell and answer me this, why on earth do Heinz name their soups cream of? As far as I've ever known

Mushrooms, tomatoes or chickens Have never been cream-giving ingredients Yeah Well, you're not going to get any cream out of a chicken With that attitude, Liam You have to sweet-talk them first Answer me this How did it come about

That soups were named that call for cream in this way isn't it cream as in creamed corn rather than cream from a mushroom it's cream of a mushroom it's got cream in it doesn't it we all know what it means it's mashed up when you talk about creamed corn it's mashing up corn isn't it well so the cream of soups they the base either involves like a creamy puree of vegetables or cream. Yeah. I don't know why it's cream of when it's creamed or creamed with, but there it is. We've just got to all live with it.

But it's the cream of mushrooms. It's the mashed up product of mushrooms. Yeah, yeah. But you'd be disappointed, wouldn't you, if you got cream of mushroom soup and it wasn't creamy in texture. Whereas by your definition, you could just juice the mushrooms and that's cream of mushroom soup. Yeah, I guess there must be cream in mushrooms.

I think the two explanations probably combine Cream and vegetable puree I think it's both isn't it It's got cream in it but also it can mean The cream of mushroom as in the product of mushing up mushrooms Whereas cream crackers, no cream, make no mistake You could cream crackers But it'd just be a meaningless paste

Cream of cracker soup Oh that'd be dry yeah it'd be popular in the south why? do you know about crackers

meaning a southern gentleman what? no the expression crackers no I'm from the south no no not the

south of England the south of America as in South America the south of the United States of America ok see how confusing my word is

in the wrong mouth white gentlemen sometimes refer to as crackers meaning redneck or similar no I've never heard that nor have I because they used to gather in the wrong mouth. White gentlemen sometimes refer to it as crackers, meaning redneck or similar. No, I've never heard that. Nor have I.

Because they used to gather in the cracker barrel and discuss matters of the day. What is the cracker barrel? You would siphon out the crackers, like you'd put your cup under the tap and you'd get some liquid crackers.

No, it's just when you would go to a country store, there'd be a big barrel and it would have crackers that you could snack on and you could scoop up some of those and take them home

to your wife. Right. And that's their equivalent of the water cooler moment, is it? The cracker barrel. Yep. Chat. Yep. What an extraordinary romantic story you've just told us.

I've read about a Tanzanian soup called supu. And how does that make you feel? Well, pretty rank. Do you know what's in it? Poo? You're not far off. And a woman called Sue? Goat lungs Heart

Liver Head Cow stomach Intestines and tongue Hoof and tail I feel like such an idiot For putting my goat lungs On my cereal all this time

I should have been So much more adventurous I think that would be okay Well it's only a Tanzanian equivalent Of a Jewish chicken soup In a way isn't it Which does have giblets

And intestines and head in it Or like scotch broth It sounds like Yeah there's something Quite vivid about A Tanzanian gentleman mashing up goat lungs, though, which there just isn't in a pre-made supermarket soup powder,

and yet they're the same thing. You don't want to know what is in those powder minestrone. You don't want to know, do you? Yeah, that's the thing. So here I am feeling culturally superior because I don't eat goat lung soup, and I probably do. I wouldn't eat the tiger penis soup, though. I know that they're endangered and that's why you shouldn't, but even if they weren't, that just doesn't appeal to me.

Is it because you're afraid everyone will think you're gay? You've put too many cocks in your mouth as it is. Would you eat a tiger's tits soup? Would you eat any kind of penis? I thought you'd never ask, Martin. No, I don't think I would eat any kind of penis, no. Would you eat something that was small, like a whitebait, so you were incidentally eating the penis?

Yeah, you've eaten loads of animal penises without real oh wow you really caught me off for that that's like that is just a modern version of a primary school when they used to go did you see spastic say no last night no ah you're spastic unbelievable i don't by the way stand by the use of the word spastic and it just genuinely is what happened to me at primary school do you like fish sticks the playground joke they had at my school as well as did you know they're taking gullible out the dictionary i love that joke that's a brilliant joke it's um you ollie put put your fingers in your mouth that is yeah and then say i was born on a pirate ship oh because i got i am a lanker i am a lanker son oh that's good as well I was born on a pirate ship

Oh that actually didn't work What's supposed to sound like shit? Parle of shit I was born on a parle of shit I was born on a pirate ship It's not good It doesn't work Wanker son's better

because it sounds like wanker Simple Well we've all learnt something today I'm not the pheasant Plucker I'm a pheasant plucker Yeah I can't do that With my fingers in my mouth If you've been affected

by any of the issues in today's programme, you can call 0208 123 5877. Or you can nut up or shut up. Are you a man or a minx? Mrs M, Mrs I, Mrs SSI, Mrs P, Mrs Y, Mrs I can't remember the rhyme. This is a question from Kristen from Mississippi, who says, Helen, answer me this. How do things... Do I spell Mississippi?

How do things that glow in the dark work? Phosphorescence. Oh, no, that rubbish Jesus band. Oh. Boom. Is that evanescence? It's an evanescence joke. That's what it was.

Okay. Fluorescence is a phenomenon is when you put light into something and it emits light at a lower wavelength. So there's UV things that light up. You shine UV light and you get lower wavelength. Keep it light. Keep it fun, Martin. Sorry, I thought you wanted a technical expression.

Anyway, phosphorescence is the same, but it's a very, very slow process of re-emitting the light that you put into it. It's like a light storage process. Yeah, but a very, very slow process. But sometimes, like on watches, the fluorescent paint on the hands might have a little bit of radioactive material.

Really? Yes. That is interesting. When I was about 10, I went to NASA in Florida. When I was about 32, I went to NASA in Florida. I went and...

Well, I went more recently. There were more rockets there. I went there when I Florida. I went and... Well, I went more recently. There were more rockets there. I went there when I was 34. Anyway, if I'd have gone, actually, when I was 32, I could have got a T-shirt with NASA written on it.

Whereas at the time, what I thought I wanted was that space food that they eat in space. I got some for my niece, but she is seven, so I thought it was appropriate. I mean, imagine

what dehydrated ice cream tastes like. Not a very nice idea, is it? Why would you want to buy that as a souvenir a bit like polystyrene but pink yeah exactly like that tastes a bit like you're eating a bar of soap at lush anyway alongside my space food the thing that i brought back from nasa were i guess they were packaged as like space letters but actually they were just cut out little letters that you could stick on the ceiling and they'd give a glow in the dark phrase but i didn't know what to write oh no um so i wrote this is humiliating but i think it's revealing something in my character yeah i wrote

there's only one ollie man there's another ollie man on twitter isn't there which is why you're the ollie man no there's some twat got at ollie man and then didn't use it ever and all the only correspondence he's had as far as i know is people trying to get me and including me saying hey can I get this off you. In a way a publicity shy Ollie man is like your portrait in the attic. Yeah but anyway I just I just find it embarrassing to look back on all the creative things I could have written I love mummy and I wrote there's only one Ollie man. I think it just shows a ridiculous sort of sense of self-belief, which I wasn't entitled to have, really. Anyway, Martin, who does not have a ridiculous sense of self-belief,

bought a large melamine plate with the moon on it. That's cool. I got a charm bracelet, which has got rockets and astronauts and a landing pod on it. That's cool as well. It just goes to show that when you're 32 slash 34, you appreciate tourist gift shops more.

You get the good shit. Here's a question from Carl, who says, Helen, answer me this. Why do we have we have artex ceilings because the person who owned your house before and then died uh put it there and is from a different era to you yeah it's the sort of thing they did then isn't it borders that's another thing people used to do oh those ones that sort of waist height yeah and then your wallpaper is different underneath yes but the border perhaps matches the uh the curtain fabric yeah you know but the border perhaps matches the curtain fabric. You know, just the thing that holds the curtains to the wall.

Pelmet. The pelmet, yes, indeed. He continues, who created this particular design? Well, you have to check and see if there's a signature at the bottom. There are a lot of different patterns, aren't there? Because there's a sort of stipply effect. There are various different waves. Some people even go for fancy leafy designs.

They are awful, aren't they? It's like gravel houses. That's the other one. Pebble dash. Well, it's a similar awful aren't they it's like gravel houses that's the other one pebble dash well it's similar i know it's a cheap material but just paint it for god's sake we've covered pebble dash before it's because uh in places like stoke-on-trent which have got a lot of mine shafts underneath so the houses are subject to subsidence it covers up the fact your walls are cracked artex similar it's very tough it doesn't crack like plaster and that's why people put it up and also i think it became very popular during the kind of craze for diy and home improvements which sort of hit britain

around i think the 70s and it was relatively easy you didn't have to get it all perfect like plaster so people just daubed it on it's got asbestos in it which means you can't really take it off again but they say just don't even try getting it off just cover it up with plaster which you can then smooth over so that's why people liked it to cover up the fact that the walls were uneven like my mom used to be really into textured wallpaper so well people will be able to see that the plaster is not even but then all you could see is unevenness in the bloody textured wallpaper instead what i don't understand is uh not so much why artex exists from retro times because the company started in the 30s is why it still exists now who is still rtxing their houses because let's say the last great rtx

craze was 20 years ago yeah the company should have gone bust by now right yeah but i guess things come around don't they like cassettes won't die people still want to listen to cassettes they're virtually dead that's just retro maniac but it is lunatics right other hipsters are texting their houses right now. Another morning opens with a bloom of questions burgeoning anew. But questions seem to always strike at awkward times like when I'm on the loo. They answer me, there's paperbacks The perfect size to take into the drum It's at your local Waterstones or online Amazon For your convenience Here's a question from Rachel in Phnom Penh

who says, Helen, answer me this. Why is there a Sussex, an Essex and a Wessex but no Nossix in Englandland no sex this seems like an odd omission yeah it's because surely that's the reason isn't it because it sounds a bit like no sex oh it's a much older reason than that go on then because otherwise why would you put sex in the county names which we've discussed before on this podcast middle sex so the conquerors of uh this nation uh were the saxons and the Angles. And they separated into lots of different kingdoms. So South Sax was Sussex.

East Sax was Essex. Middle Sax in the middle. Wessex, that was West Saxon lands. But they did not have a North Sax because the Angles had that area. So they just never got to the North one. Oh, so North Sax was just the Angles territory? Yeah.

Okay. So instead of choosing a Sax at all yeah the sax should have chosen something else to have the north of and they could have had it couldn't they yeah well they could have just scraped a bit off the top of middle sex and said that's the north yeah but they didn't think they didn't think about their legacy they probably thought we'll probably conquer that angle land later didn't hi guys it's mike from belfast uh i have a bit of a problem. Years ago, I started writing a little heartfelt verses, poems, messages in birthday cards, you know, Mother's Day cards, things like that, because it made me look really deep and sensitive and also meant that I didn't have to buy as expensive a present because, you know, it was the thought that counted.

It was easy for a while, but now years later, every time I have to sit down and write on a card, I'm racking my brains for some new way to express the same old things. I hate repeating myself. So, Helen and Ollie, answer me this. Have you ever set yourself any dangerous or, in retrospect, unfortunate precedents? And how did you get out of them? Wally started a podcast and they thought, gosh, we probably won't be doing this in a few months. We'll have run out of things to say, but lo did they continue. And they realised having used up all their most obvious thoughts, they had to just delve deeper and deeper to get their next most obvious

thoughts. And then the next most obvious thoughts, and then some thoughts you truly wouldn't expect to have about subjects such as pizza or pop music or whatever. My friends, Ben and Nikki started a cycle of buying each other birthday presents that were a bit too nice for each other's birthdays and one of them now has to break it because they can't afford to keep doing it what happened is she took him to new york for his 30th oh and so he got her an ipad for christmas where'd

you go after the ipad exactly a boat it's just ridiculous isn't it? But I don't know what lesson Mike is supposed to infer from that unless he goes back in time and just tries less hard at the beginning so that he's got more room to manoeuvre. I suppose just go to places you didn't know you had in you Mike and maybe don't go for the obvious themes of Mother's Day-isms.

Rather than trying to come up with poetry each time, could you just do a little drawing that's sort of like a jokey thing Based around your relationship with the person that you're sending it to Yeah but the point is he's now set the precedent That he does poetry So there's one year where the drawing's got to be as good as the poem Well it doesn't though because a new medium to express himself

Then I don't think he does have to meet the standards of the poem Maybe you could do a puzzle Like do a word search Mike Because then you don't even have to put the words into a good order Here's a question from David from Malden who says, Ollie, answer me this. Why are car tyres black? Wouldn't it be much more fun if you could get them to match the colour of your car?

I have a red car and I want red tyres. Well, David, how about orangey brown tyres? That'd be pretty cool because that's the colour that tyres used to be. The colour of latex. And the problem was theyx. Really? Yeah. And the problem was they weren't really durable enough, so then they put carbon in them to give them more traction, and then the natural colour they actually went was black from the carbon. Just get yourself some red rims then instead, David. Well, you can get red ones, but the friction isn't as good.

So the tyres will wear down quicker, and it'll cost you more. And it'll cost you more anyway because uh if every tire stockist had to stock you know five colors of tires in various different makes instead of just one yeah they'd need more shelf space they'd need to order different amounts it would end up costing you more even more because tires are a lot tires are a lot i spent 420 pounds getting two tires recently yep outrageous yeah but then it stops me from dying on the road so yeah and some of this hampton court was henry the eighth's home the o2 arena was the millennium dome

wasn't it i went to see you in your room But it had been turned into a weather spoon So I ordered a two-for-one curry and a macaroon But they don't sell macaroons Do they? I just ate both curries And now I regret that A question of hygiene now from Simon, who says, Due to me being horrendously bad with my funds,

I've moved back in with my parents on the proviso that my girlfriend, Moo, can stay over every night. Wow, I would not have liked to have been in that negotiation. No, what exactly are you offering them? Yeah Well parents I've come to take up that room That you're finding so desolate And in return you can think about the fact

That I'm having sex in your house With someone called a noise And by the way I have no money So we'll just be eating your food as well But I think at the moment Because of recession and everything A lot of parents have to accept the fact that their adult children are going to return to the nest

that they had just converted into a gym in a nest. Simon continues, Moo comes from a much more well-to-do middle-class background, as opposed to my working-class Yorkshire background and is very particular about the way things are done, including hygiene

and cleanliness. Are the working-class unhygienic and uncleanly? If Simon hadn't written to us saying that, if Simon had said, well, I'm middle class and my girlfriend's working class, so obviously she's filthy, that's an outrageous thing to say, isn't it? In fact, you get a lot of aristocrats that are kind of crazy dirty and hoarders.

And a lot of very house-proud council flat tenants and stuff like that. Yes. Let's not make this a class thing. No, let's not, Simon. This transcends class. Let's come together after Thatcher. Simon continues.

My parents, however, are not obsessed by hygiene and cleanliness. Good, they've probably got more interesting things to think about. Like, why is your girlfriend called a son? Back when we were living in my flat, continues Simon, with her help and of my own volition we kept it spotlessly clean since my change of address though i've been the one person in a household of five people who does all the cleaning from scrubbing the toilet to vacuuming and mopping the floors wow such a cinderella aren't you actually actually i mean that is a handy thing

for the parents to have around isn't it a surf maybe that's why your parents are being a bit messy exactly they know that you're there to scoop it up yeah uh i myself says simon was never a clean freak until i got my own place so i can see how this seems very odd to my parents so helen asked me this how can i recruit my parents into at least helping me keep the house looking spic and span without them thinking it's all the doing of my very lovely and very particular girlfriend i'm aware too that them letting her stay over every night is very generous indeed so i don't want to tread on their toes too much i just think a slight change of lifestyle would benefit not just me but also them sure but you are under their roof and therefore you kind of have to put up with their lifestyle don't you but i think

if they if they're accepting your cleaning and they're not going stop it yeah they know perfectly well but it's better they've got a good deal yeah why on earth would they help you and if you're living rent-free i don't think this is that unreasonable the problem is the two people in the house that aren't you or your parents maybe they're the ones that you need to address if they're also living there rent-free to recruit into a kind of rota system the best you can do is ask them to financially support the buying of the cleaning products that you are demanding need to be there. I don't think you can expect them

to start copying your cleaning regime when you've come to live in their house. No one likes a passive-aggressive, annoying, neat freak housemate. Well, listeners, that's the end of this episode. But please do send us your questions that there may be another episode next week oh please helen ollie let there be another episode do oh why are you emotionally blackmailing me helen and ollie because we need your questions

questionnaires otherwise we won't do it because we have nothing to say that's why yeah yeah god you've laid it out so boredly where's the romance gone anyway but do get in touch by all of the means which are available on our website answermethispodcast.com where you can also find links to our first 120 episodes at the incredibly generous sum of only 79 pence each what else are you going to buy

with that 79 pence nothing of import you can buy you can buy one of my songs from my album you can get those for free as well on your podcast

you've just undercut your own market you can buy like a packet and a half of Rolos or something. You can follow me on Instagram if you want to. I do some good photos.

It's incredible the good things we tempt the listeners at this point in the show. The sky, buildings, people. Neither of us follow Martin on Instagram, do we? I don't use Instagram. No, exactly.

Neither do I. That's because I'm the best at Instagram and there's no point. I would join Instagram just to block Martin. We'll see you next week. Bye!