Answer Me This! - AMT373: Dr Martens, the Queen's Private Cinema, and Helen's Sentient Bed

Episode Date: May 2, 2019

Things that have got the listeners perplexed this month: what do you do when you and your partner have the same name? Why doesn't the evil queen in Narnia drive a snazzier form of transport than a sled? And how does the Queen go to the cinema? Find out more about this episode at . Send us questions for future episodes: email written words or voice memos to [e-mail]. Tweet us Facebook Subscribe on Apple Podcasts Hear AMT episodes 1-200, all five of our special albums, and our Best Of compilations at . Hear Helen Zaltzman's podcast The Allusionist at , Olly Mann's The Modern Mann at , and Martin Austwick's Song By Song at . Helen and Martin are touring New Zealand and Australia for the next three months - see their gig listings at . This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Want to build a website? Go to , and get a 10% discount on your first purchase of a website or domain with the code 'answer'. Also! Get free audiobooks and half-price Audible subscriptions at - and while you're browsing around Audible, be sure to download Olly's new series . Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How many crows were counted by counting crows? A-s-a-b-e-d-e-s, a-s-a-b-e-d-e-s Is it the same boat in showboat as in anything goes? A-s-a-b-e-d-e-s, a-s-a-b-e-d-e-s Heaven and all the a-s-a-b-e-d-e-s We have a comedy of errors in this email from Sean from New York. Is it written entirely in iambic pentameter? Yes, and a lot of it is no longer acceptable with today's gender politics.

No, it's from Sean from New York. Sean, I believe, identifies as female. And she says, I have been dating a nice gentleman and it's recently become serious. Everything is lovely, but we have a tiny problem that won't be going away anytime soon you see my name is sean s-h-a-w-n and his name is s-e-a-n sean oh dear it's mostly just funny and it doesn't cause any trouble when it's just the two of us no of course because why would you well unless you're the kind of people that do refer to yourselves in the third person. In bed. Give it to me, Sean.

That would be weird. Actually, yeah, that is a bit narcissistic. Do not say that to yourself when you're masturbating. I do call my right fist, Sean. Sean says it doesn't cause any trouble when it's just the two of us, but it's confusing for our friends. I was hoping that somehow, organically, our friends would come up with charming nicknames to distinguish us,

but so far both sets of friends have come up with the same solution, which is to call the other Sean, Sean 2.0, which is just causing more confusion. We both have long, unwieldy surnames, so going by those won't work, and using my middle name makes me feel like a misbehaving child i really like having a name that's unusual for a woman to have so i don't want to be called by a feminine variant of it i've spent all my life correcting people who call me shauna it's a lovely name but it's not mine and by the same token my partner sean is not interested

in being called seen well thank you sean for just chitting on all the possible answers that I could have given. I'm not sure what's left. Really up the difficulty level. I worry if we leave it too long, people are going to default to some version of boy Sean and girl Sean. Yeah, that is a plausible answer, isn't it? But it sounds like she's ruling that one out as well helpfully yeah it's good to know what sean's parameters are so that we're not just delivering useless solutions good to know what sean doesn't want yes absolutely what does she want right

ollie answer me this what should we have our friends call us to reduce this confusion or is it still better to wait and hope nicknames develop naturally? How do they feel about Shawnee? She didn't rule it out. What about the Australian nickname trend, which is to add an O? Shawno. Shawno. I actually have a solution for this that I think could work, which is based on my experience working with Olly Peart,

who does one of my podcasts with me, The Modern Man, because when we're working together and our producer wants to refer to us, initially we decided that he'd call us Man and piet but in reality we never do that because that feels like public school so what we do is he says ollie m and ollie p and although that's semi-formal it's not as um butter clenching as full surnames and it's quick so how about you take the initial of your boyfriend's surname and he becomes Sean P, for example, and you become Sean R, or whatever your surnames start with.

What if their surnames start with the same letter somehow? Although I think Sean has been informative enough, she would have said. We recently did a podcast called Potalus, which is presented by a man called Mike Schubert. So he went to a school where there were a lot of Mikes, and he just said, you go with a nickname based on the surname.

So he's Schubes, based on his surname, and that's quicker and easier than being like Mike S. Another option, but I think it's a worse one than Sean first initial of surname, is one of you has a quirk where it's like oh, Sean is always eating a hard-boiled egg.

Sean Egg. but it just depends whether you want to commit to that or just be called Sean and Sean I mean is it that problematic really hello Helen and Ollie this is Andrew from Melbourne in his song Shotgun George Ezra tells us that time flies by in the yellow

and green stick around and you'll see what I mean I've stuck around through that song several times now and I still don't know what the fuck he means. So Helen and Ollie, answer me this. What is the yellow and green and what about it makes time fly by? Is it some kind of drug reference?

Please enlighten me. I read that he was up Montjuic in Barcelona which were the 1992 Olympic stadiums and the Miro Museum. I strongly recommend the Miro Museum if you're ever in Barcelona which were the 1992 Olympic stadiums and the Miro Museum I strongly recommend the Miro Museum if you're ever in Barcelona and there was a lot of sunshine and a lot of greenery

Oh I see, yellow, sunshine, green on a mountain, no Yeah I just assumed it was about the beach and the palm trees, it was just a kind of classic, yeah. Okay so it might have a double meaning because his whole career basically is taking a gap year and writing fucking irritating songs about it. So, of course, you could match different locations to the lyrics.

But he is actually quite explicit in this because he says, South of the equator, navigator, gotta hit the road. So we've identified that he's in the southern part of the globe. So I'm not sure Barcelona really works. Unless it's a song that refers to several different locations. Because I got the impression it was about the travelling lifestyle, about going to different places, relaxing, keeping on the move. Yeah.

But he is a fellow podcaster, so if we meet him in the clubhouse, we can ask him. I mean, he does actually in the video as well, it's filmed in like 100 different places with him in the middle of the screen. So that would help that explanation. I'm fairly indifferent to this song but the video is good yeah technically quite challenging i think we're talking about different videos there's like the one weird we watch was like there's the cameras like spinning around and he's in these weird like squares of

like idyllic locations it's really cool oh no i was watching the lyric video where he's sent a screen talking directly at you in different locations and looks a bit like a young maggie thatcher i mean i'm not going to go back to youtube to watch the second george ezra video well what's the making of video and you'll get the gist yeah i don't have any particular feelings about george ezra's music but i'm starting to find him quite endearing just based on anecdotes about his songs written about places apart from this song the only one i was aware of having heard was Budapest. He says that he's never been there, but he was in Malmo in Sweden

and the Eurovision Song Contest was being held in Malmo that night and got hammered on rum. And then the next day he was supposed to be getting the train to Budapest, but he was too hungover. So then he didn't go and he wrote this song about how he's miles from Budapest. He's got Eurovision hangover. Yeah, I suppose the clue's in the title.

Well, he is miles from Budapest at all times since he's never been there. Yeah, right. So it's very truthful. It is truthful. None of the places are unglamorous places. You know, he doesn't write songs about Salford. He writes songs about places that make you think, oh, that's exotic. He's from Hertford. Has he written any songs about Hertfordshire?

Write a song about Hertford. That would be ideal. about Hertfordshire? Write a song about Hertford. That would be ideal. Yeah, you could do a whole album about Hertfordshire. I mean, where? There's a built-in pun in that one. I could write an album just about the wave machines of Hertfordshire swimming pools based on childhood experience.

What would be track 10? Letchworth Reprise. Knick-knacks in the foyer. That's my track 10. But he could have called that song Eurovision Hangover Letchworth reprise. Knickknacks in the foyer, that's my track ten. But he could have called that song Eurovision Hangover and then wouldn't you have been all about it? Hey, hello, Nolly. It's Luke from Paris. So I've just come out of the cinema

and for some reason I started thinking about the Queen as you do so if the Queen wanted to see a film like a film in the cinemas at the moment does she get like a private screening at a Buckingham Palace or do they for like security reasons shut down an entire cinema so she can go and see it or does she just sneak in the back in disguise what do you think luke she can do whatever the fuck she wants she's the queen like any of those are possible but i mean it's more likely isn't it that she'll just say please show this film for me and they will she can cancel the government anytime technically she just chooses not to i think also how many 90 something year olds get to the cinema that often because you know so noisy my grandma

actually still goes to the cinema on a weekly basis i would say yeah but your grandma's fucking cool ollie yeah it is unusual that's true and and she only goes to the same cinema each time because she knows she can park in the disabled spot just outside the logistics are important at that age i would think it'd be more pertinent to ask can prince harry go to the cinema you know just on a normal thing not like when one of the princes goes to the baftas and everyone has to stand up and be silent and then they all sit and watch the baftas like can he just sneak in the back at the windsor multiplex if there is one you're right that that is the more person question because i suspect the answer is that the younger royals

do sneak into cinemas on occasion. And they would just go in at the back and not make a big deal out of being there so long as they've got their security detail with them. But for the Queen, she has a cinema in Buckingham Palace. There's a private cinema there, as well as a surgical theatre and a chapel and a post office and everything she needs

surgical theatre and is there like a full-time surgeon or do they just bring in one of the local surgeons when it's needed my understanding is that there's a sort of head of the queen's medical staff who's permanent who's basically like a gp plus um but then you know in addition to that there's a little repertoire of top surgeons that work across London's private hospitals who can be drafted in at any moment. Yeah, I don't think there is one sort of in the cellar with a pair of pliers waiting to open up the Royals at any moment.

And I wonder if there's one at Balmoral in Sandringham, like whether they've got little operating theatres or not. I think they've thought of everything, Helen. They've been doing this for many years. Yes, they can use Queen Victoria's operating theatre and her stockpile of early anaesthetics. But the film thing has actually a pretty lively tradition in the current royal family

because of the Royal Command performance. So that's the thing that's been going on on an annual basis, certainly since the mid part of the 20th century but the first one actually was held on the 21st of july 1896 there were early doors on that new technology they really were yeah i mean that's the equivalent of them getting right in with oculus rift you know five years ago probably did didn't they it's the only way they can experience a normal life anyway the, the first Royal Command film performance was because the Prince of Wales, who later became King Edward VII, had been filmed attending the Cardiff exhibition with his wife. And the chap

who filmed this wanted to exhibit the footage publicly, but obviously asked the permission of the royal family before doing so because people were deferential in those days and the decision was let's have a laugh with this let's not just give him permission let's have a private screening let's have a private event in which we um investigate this current trend for cinema and so um they erected a special marquee and they showed 20 other short films before they showed the boring footage of the prince of wales attending the cardiff exhibition. And that was the first Royal Command film performance. They invited all of their mates to come and watch things like Henley Regatta and the Derby Race of 1895 and a boxing kangaroo.

So it's basically like the first ever film festival, maybe. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I read, and I don't know if this information is up to date, that the Queen's favourite film is Yellow Submarine. Yeah, it smells of bullshit to me, that fact. I've seen it reported a few times that she likes Yellow Submarine, but it's also widely reported that she was relieved when John Lennon returned his OBE. Oh yeah, she didn't like him. Because she met him after a Royal Variety show and thought he was vulgar.

So which is it, Liz? Well, I think you can often love hate entertainment so apparently she used to watch the bill but she said i don't like the bill but i just can't help watching it i can believe that i can't believe we're talking about the bill again i think like a lot of older people in the 1990s when she turned the telly on it probably would have been stuck on channel three wouldn't it i mean she's absolutely forced to be mrs bbc when she's in public yeah must be nice when she's at home to unwind her itv flag fly she probably watches britain's got talent she used to watch jeremy kyle x factor and coronation street and all of those are itv shows i think she's more of an itv

lady apparently she sees the royal variety Show as a bit of a chore. Like, yeah, no shit. Everyone does. No one enjoys that. I found a 1996 list of facts about the Queen. It said a number of things that piqued my interest. I'll share with you, Ollie. During her 20s, the Queen revealed herself to be a surprisingly good mimic.

A talent she's kept to this day. Her favourite acts are Rolf Harris, Rene from Alo Alo, and Tony Benn. That is something I would like to see. I think everyone would. Because she gives absolutely no shits these days. If you see an interview, particularly if someone tries to brown nose her,

because they always send, particularly like Sky News or ITV or anyone who isn't the BBC, will always send their most brown nosing correspondent along to try and mimic the dignified presentational style of the BBC. And she gives very short shrift. They'll say things like, what was it like at the coronation?

I imagine that your crown was very heavy. And she'll look at them and she'll say, of course. Dipshit, have you never worn a crown? She basically eye rolls her whole way through the interviews. Whereas if she did a bit of Tony Benn, I'd fucking love that. You know what she would thrive at? James Corden's carpool karaoke.

She apparently refuses point blank to have tea bags in the house. And I like that they call a palace a house. Well, some of her properties are... Yeah, no, they are all palaces really, aren't they? Some of them are castles. Yeah, okay. Yeah, just slumming it in the castle. Apparently she refuses to wear protective headgear when riding.

What a badass. But then her hats, those big pastel hats, have probably got like iron inside, haven't they? She cuts beads and sequins off discarded clothing so they can be used again. I believe that. No, but she's also of that thrifty wartime generation, isn't she? You can't get that out of yourself, even if you are a royal. Well, despite being wartime though,

the Queen loves butter and refuses all so-called healthy alternatives. I'm liking the Queen more because of these facts. Yeah, right. But the thing is, they never refute anything the royals So I mean all of these could have just been invented by a journalist And you're just reading them out like they're fact They could just be total fake news Like Beyonce they know there's far more power in not giving

Yes that's it isn't it Just let the myth swirl up around you She's still as inaccessible as ever And yet you know someone that most British people Probably at some point in their lives will see at an event Well we recognise her because she's on the fucking money. That is the ultimate comeback, actually, to any fight, isn't it? With the Queen.

Just like, suck this up, bitch. Slaps a £50 note down in front of you. That's my face. It'd be embarrassing if she put the note down the wrong side up. And it's some dude's face. That's Isaac Newton. Similar hair. If you've got a question, email your question. some dude's face. That's Isaac Newton. Similar hair.

If you've got a question, email your question to answer me this podcast at googlemail.com answer me this podcast at googlemail.com answer me this podcast at googlemail.com answer me this podcast

at googlemail.com. Answer me this podcast at Googlemail.com. So retrospectives, what historical events are we ticking off on this week's run of Today in History? On Monday, we bring you the real story of the mutiny on the bounty. On Tuesday, the anniversary of the day somebody invented the meatball, but who? On Wednesday, the iconic British car that ripped off an iconic American car. On Thursday, how American airlines invented air miles. And on Friday, the UFO sighting that gripped colonial America. We discuss this and more on Today in History with The Retrospectors.

Ten minutes each weekday, wherever you get your podcasts. Here's a question from Ryan from Melbourne, who says, as a child, Turkish delight always seemed appealing because of how it was described in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. But when I tried it, I found it vile. Well, you probably bought the supermarket stuff. The trick with Turkish delight is get it from Turkey. Or if you can't get it from Turkey, at least a Middle Eastern duty free.

I don't know. I think I like the shit stuff a bit better. When I first had the stuff that's like really thick and rich i was like what really it does taste different though doesn't it it's like guinness in ireland like notice it's not just tourist bollocks actually does it's a different thing whether you prefer it or not oh yeah yeah the shit stuff is basically like a slightly thicker cuba jelly covered in icing sugar it's got the same relation to turkish delight as domino's pizza does to italian pizza but um you know i grew to like the real stuff but i i i recognize the initial revulsion that ryan feels fine ryan says i later discovered one of my friends liked turkish delight so naturally i asked

him if he liked it enough to betray his family and doom a fantasy kingdom and to be clear that is anania reference that is what edmund does right in the line the witch in the wardrobe my friend insisted he would not ally with the white queen so i pressed him why to my surprise his answer was she drives a sled okay oh she needs to get some sweet wheels if she's going to get ryan's friend on her team so he likes turkish delight but dislikes snow transportation. So you've got a sled that don't impress me much. Your sweets are really gummy, but you're out of touch.

Don't get me wrong. I like to be able to move over snow. My friend explained that with her power and in a kingdom where flying fantasy beasts are real, a sled is awfully pedestrian. I guess. Would you to santa so ollie answer me this why does the white queen drive a sled because it snows in narnia i'd imagine also being driven by a flying animal is going to be awfully choppy also it's a plot point isn't it the snow runs out at one point so the kids have to abandon the sled so that allows other things in the narrative to happen whereas if it was a horse-drawn carriage or something i guess that that device would not be accessible to cs lewis yeah well also in narnia even when the snow has thawed spoiler are there

roads because i don't know the snow plows or gritters but are there even roads under all the snow so if not sled would be the best form of travel. And granted, if you're in Melbourne, you've never really had the need to understand how snow transportation would work. Agreed. But then he does have a point. If you could have a mythical plane

that's made out of dragons or something, then would you not prefer that? Well, I think you have to put the series of novels in their context historically. And C.S. Lewis was creating a fantasy for mid-century children. And kids then liked sleds. I don't think it's necessarily more complicated than that.

I mean, especially English kids. And indeed, mid-century English children also liked Turkish delight because they couldn't really get hold of that because of what I said before about the best stuff coming from Turkey and rationing had just happened so you know I think in both cases it's like jellified rose water blobs of gummy syrup are exotic and otherworldly and being transported around on a sled like Santa as Martin says is exotic I think that's it like it's a fantasy for children don't

overanalyze it but i think also a sled is a real world form of transport just like turkish delight like does narnia relate to turkey right like wouldn't it have a different name but the thing is it makes the fantasy world seem real if you have these recognizable elements like you've already got a talking beaver haven't we all so if you were like we've got this sled but it's actually a jet propelled uh metal horse with uh four rotating heads then it takes you out the story a bit whereas like you can accept the sled you can probably accept that there's a witch on it and that there's a lion who is christ i think that's probably true and there's probably something allegorical about it as well isn't there now you mentioned the line that is Christ.

I mean, the Turkish delight is, it's an allegory for the apple in Adam and Eve, isn't it? It's an update on that. Yeah, or it could be like Persephone's pomegranate seeds. So there's probably something biblical about the sled. I don't know what, because I'm not interested, particularly in Narnia or the Bible, but I bet it's something.

Well, also in the Bible, you do not get much snow transport. That's true. Maybe don't overthink that i think it's just c.s lewis wrote a world that was snowbound and so you put snow transport on it hey helen do you remember a few years ago we answered a question on the show about the legal implications of writing a new narnia story yes although i can't remember what those implications were well we were just basically saying it would be legally complicated because of the estate of cs lewis being very protective yeah well that has actually happened now oh wow is it actually out or is it locked in a legal battle because it's mired in a legal battle that we predicted years ago right oh nice to be right

well not it's not nice for the author that we're right well it's kind of fine because he wrote it so it's francis spufford who's a well-known um sort of i think he writes historical books so he'd not written fiction before but he wrote it for i think his daughter as an entertainment oh so it's fine he got to read it to his daughter but apparently then when he passed around kind of you know a few knocked off copies to his family they really liked it and it ended up in the hands of publisher who wanted to publish it and they can't because they can't get the permission of the Lewis estate. And then some of it leaked online so you can read the first chapter. And the thinking is it is actually quite literary and a worthy successor.

It's called The Stone Table. And probably at some point, you know, maybe when the copyright is about to expire or whatever, the Lewis estate will grant it as an unofficial. I think it's a prequel, but it could be a sequel to Narnia. I wonder whether it would be easier to get that it's a prequel but it could be a sequel to narnia i wonder whether um it would be easier to get that done as a film or tv script and also how much of it has to be different like if it doesn't have aslan in it then probably fine right oh yeah but this is written

very much like in the style of cs lewis he's a professional writer he's aped his style in the way that when people write as Ian Fleming or whatever, it reads like him. So it's actually a literary thing. It's not so much about trying to create the film. It is like another book that Lewis never wrote. It'd be weird though, wouldn't it, if you were that writer, to know that in 60 years' time someone would be writing in

your style and trying to knock it off as you. I guess it's fan fiction. Well, some writers pre-empt this, like Francine Pascal that wrote the Sweet Valley books. It was a team of people hammering them out. And Sophie Hanna, she's written Agatha Christie books, but I think she's the writer chosen by the estate to be allowed to do it.

Well, this is it. So Agatha Christie is probably more out of copyright than C.S. Lewis is, given her age. So that's what I mean. I wonder if at the last minute they just, they will acquiesce. Like Elvis, you know, just as some of those Elvis songs are about to go out of copyright,

oh yeah, suddenly you can do it as a dance remix. Just milk the last bit of money out of it. You mentioning the possibility of a prequel to The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe reminded me of The Magician's Nephew. And that was the sixth of the seven Narnia books, even though it's the first chronologically in the series. Ahead of his time, wasn't he?

He wrote his own prequel, yeah. Yeah, I mean, chronologically ahead of his time in Narnia terms, and also in terms of popular culture. It was C.S. Lewis's own Better Call Saul. I was thinking more of the Star Wars movies, but fine. I like reading, but not while I'm driving. Apparently that's illegal. I want to listen to Richard Dawkins reading Darwin's Voyage of the Beagle.

Me too. Well, there we can do that. And I'll keep my license by signing up for a free audiobook. Let's go to answermethispodcast.com slash audible and have a look now.

Yes, this is it, your last month to get the Audible offer this year. So, yes, I know it goes too soon, doesn't it, Helen? It's my favourite bit of this podcast but this month is uh both ollie and martin's birthdays so you could uh celebrate by giving yourself a present of free audiobooks that's right and then the offer ends may the 31st sure so uh if you are

in the uk and you haven't taken up your two free audiobooks offer yet, do it before May the 31st. If you've done it before, we have an alternative offer for you as well, half-price membership for three months. But that offer, too, ends on May the 31st at answermethispodcast.com slash audible. Do you listen to audiobooks with Harvey? I used to love listening to audiobooks when I was a child. Susan Hampshire reading something or other really made a strong impression, I guess.

It was probably 35 years ago at this point. I did used to listen to what we didn't call audiobooks in the 80s, in the 80s, yes, of children's books. I haven't yet with Harvey. I think because when I'm reading a book to him, I like to do all my own voices and stuff. And so it would be weird for me to delegate that work to an actor. But I do listen to a lot

of audiobooks anyway the one that i've got lined up at the moment is uh the new one from emily mateless have you seen that written about she's she's written a book about how she prepares her interviews and stuff oh interesting especially for you i would imagine um the book is called airhead which i think is a clever name uh and it's it's sort of all the background gossip on her interviews with she's interviewed like five prime ministers and two US presidents and, you know, Silicon Valley tycoons. And there's a bit about her stalking case as well, which went on for years and was in the news.

To clarify, Emily Maitlis was being stalked. Was being stalked. She wasn't doing the stalking. Yeah. I'm also curious to know how they do the audiobook, because I've read there's a lot of interview transcripts in the book. So I want to know whether they play in the sound of the interviews or whether she does the voices because her doing the Dalai Lama would be precious

well if you want to find out whether Emily Maitlis can do the Dalai Lama's voice go to answer me this podcast.com slash audible and take out the free trial time for a question from andy who is in bangkok but formerly of boreham wood helen answer me this the inventor of dr martin's boots what did he or she get their doctorate in so was dr martin really a doctor is i suppose basically the question yes dr klaus uh Martins forgive me I don't know how to pronounce German is uh spelled m-a-e-r but the e was dropped to anglicize the name when a British company bought Dr Martins like a kind of a omelette sound he was a physician so a doctor in the GP style and interesting that he wasn't uh British I didn't realize that was the history

there because um I know from my stints on Radio Northampton that Dr Martens is still based there proudly. So I would have guessed he would be an English or she, I didn't know who the doctor was, would have been an English doctor, but it was a German company was that got bought out. Right. So what happened was in 1945, Dr Klaus Martens was 25 and he was an army doctor and he broke his foot apparently skiing and then while convalescing it was too painful to wear his standard issue

army boots with a leather sole and so in post-war Munich he went around scavenging materials like leather from abandoned cobbler shops and rubber from the airfields. And he worked out how to make a kind of cushioned sole. And that was a real innovation.

Then he teamed up with a friend, Dr. Herbert Funk, who I assume was another medical doctor. And they started selling them in 1947. 80% of sales were to women over the age of 40 because comfy shoes. Then in 1959, they were looking to sell them internationally and the Northamptonshire-based R. Griggs Group Limited Footwear bought the rights to manufacture the shoes in Britain. And, well, they did quite a lot of things to the Dr. Martens.

So they changed the name to be more anglicised. They improved the fit. They added a rounded bulbous upper and introduced the trademark yellow stitching and rebranded the sole unit as Airwear. But it's a very different product, wasn't it? By the time it became truly popular, like in the 60s and 70s, amongst punks and people on working class protests and whatever,

that's a very different market than I imagine they were going into in 1959. Yeah, well, what happened was it was a utility shoe. And then a few years later, Pete Townsend bought a pair because he was changing his style. He said, I was sick of dressing up as a Christmas tree and flowing robes that got in the way of my guitar playing. So he moved on to utility wear and bought like boiler suits.

And then he bought a pair of Doc Martens to wear with them. And then he found that because of the air cushioned soles, he could really jump around on stage. And so they then got this association with rock as well. Is that why Elton John wears the giant Doc Martens in Tommy? Yes, exactly why. The boots, they went through punk and then to the kind of nationalistic movements, but they were also the same boots that the police wore.

They've always sort of been everybody's boot, haven't they? Which is quite interesting. Like they're still seen, I think, as kind of working class boots, but they retail for 80 quid. war they've always sort of been everybody's boot haven't they which is quite interesting like they're still seen i think as kind of working class boots but they retail for 80 quid yeah they're pricing actually they're not really affordable i think they were trying to rebrand uh as a fashion boot to try and shed some of the political associations that they had um so that's why they've got like these sort of glittery ones and stuff like that so some people are a little worried

that they're not allowed to like Dr. Martens because the original Dr. Martin was in the German army during the Second World War. And from that, I found out some interesting origins of other shoes. There was a pair of brothers, the Dassler brothers, one called Adolf, but known as Adi, and the other Rudolf. They had a shoe company in Germany during the 20s and 30s, very popular shoes. But then during the Second World War, the brothers fell out. They both joined the Nazi party. One brother was very, very into the Nazi party and went off to fight. And the other one stayed behind and made shoes for the military.

After that, they split up, each founded their own shoe company. Rudolf, who'd gone off to fight, formed Puma. Huh. And Adi formed Adidas. No. Yep. Wait, so which was the more Nazi shoe? I think they're both Nazi shoes.

We have a question now from Veronica, a Peace Corps volunteer in Vanuatu. Of course. It's between Australia and Fiji, if you're trying to imagine it. She says, I'm currently a Peace Corps volunteer in a very volcanic country. That's another fact about Vanuatu that we now know. George Ezra has probably written a song about it. I've been to Vanuatu, I recommend it to you. Vanuatu. There have been, she says, two major full island evacuations in less than a year due to one volcano. Yeah, suddenly not such an appealing destination for George Ezra or anybody. And there are ongoing island evacuations on another island at the moment due to another volcano.

I'm often told by villagers that volcano A's activity went down because volcano B's increased. And that if volcano B's activity decreases, then volcano A will increase in activity again. Ah, so it's like the couple who live in the weather house. It's only one who's outside of the weather house at any time. Right. I've also been told when more than one increases in activity at a time it's because of whichever one increased first don't understand well she basically just wants to know are the two volcanoes linked in terms of their activity uh she says helen answer me this are volcanoes in the ring of fire influenced by each other or are scientists even in agreement about whether or not they are as As Martin is the only scientist of the three of us,

Martin, are you in agreement? Well, essentially there's three scenarios. They could be linked in the sense that if one goes up, the activity of the other goes up. They could be anti-correlated, so when one goes up, the activity of the other goes down, which is what she's talking about. That's what she's suggesting, yeah.

Or they could be completely uncorrelated. And all of those situations happen in volcanoes. So in Hawaii, it's probably some of the most famous volcanoes, Kilauea and Mauna Loa. They're 30 kilometres apart, but their activity is not related. Wow.

Whereas there's examples of positive correlation in Taupo area of New Zealand, not far from where we are now. There's a couple of volcanoes in Russia, which is weirdly part of the Ring of Fire. The Klaivcheskaya and Bezimiani volcanoes in 2012, the eruption of one triggered the eruption of the other, the Bezimiani. And as Bezimiani started to erupt, the other volcanoes kind of stopped erupting effectively so there was a kind of draining of magma away as as one of the volcanoes depleted the resource of magma when she asks are volcanoes in the ring of fire influenced

by each other you're saying yes they are you found examples of them being so and examples when they're not i'm saying sometimes there are sometimes there aren't now i don't know specifically uh where she is because I couldn't find any research papers on those volcanoes talking about whether they were correlated or uncorrelated. But within the Ring of Fire, there are examples of them being correlated, them being anti-correlated, them being completely uncorrelated. It really depends on the specific geology, I guess.

Well, I hope that helps, Veronica. Keep up the good work. Yeah, to be honest, I would have thought that you being on Vanuatu would have more of an idea about this than we would. Although we are in New Zealand, which is also part of the Ring of Fire. She's been discussing it with the villagers. Their opinion is that one went down because the other increased. It's certainly possible. It's difficult, isn't it?

Because on the one hand, you think, well, they've got that local knowledge Helen is alluding to. On the other hand, you think, yeah, but that's how lies spread isn't it people have folk memory about things uh maybe you'd be a bit more cautious if you live in that area so maybe you wouldn't make up something that says oh we're probably safe when you're not so maybe that is quite legitimate uh knowledge i don't know maybe you would do the opposite thing where you don't want to be worried all the time you're like oh the other one's going off yeah probably fine that sounds more likely to me because it because it's both you can't be wrong then, can you? You probably will be fine if the other one's going off,

but then also it comes with a built-in dread that you're next, which you will be. But I also wonder whether the volcanoes that are correlated are always correlated, and same with the volcanoes that are anti-correlated. Does that ever change, or is that just like, no, that's the system? See, if George Ezra sung about that kind of thing, I'd be into it if george ezra did more geology songs yeah and

volcanology why are all yaz fan sites just about one thing the only way is up is not the only song she sings what about abandon me one woman, all good thing going. Her single from 96. You should make your own Yaz site to fill in the gaps. Since you seem to think all the current Yaz sites are crap. Go to squarespace.com, build your Yaz site and put Yaz back on the map. The only way is up. Thanks very much to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode of Answer Me This.

And helping you make beautiful websites all over the world that are accessible all over the world because that's how the internet works. Apart from China. Yeah, you don't have to go all over the world to make one. You can just sit on your ass at home on your own building the website. But then if you need assistance, you can contact Squarespace's online support team 24-7. So geography is not a factor there. So try out Squarespace, go to squarespace.com slash answer. You can use it for two weeks for free, just fiddling around with it and building stuff and

seeing how it works. And then if you sign up, remember to get a 10% discount off your first purchase of a website or domain using our code ANSWER. Here's a question from Sam in Cambridge who says, I've just seen an advert on Facebook for slender tone pads. I'm a bit confused though. I thought these things died out or were outlawed in the 1970s because they didn't really work. Ollie, answer me this. Do they work?

Is wearing one of these things going to dissolve my fat arse or belly? Well, clearly not by itself, no. I don't think anyone has, you know, used just Slender Tone to lose weight. And that is the get-out clause for all weight loss and toning products, isn't it? Oh, yes, like, must be used in conjunction with a healthy diet and exercise plan. Exactly, because there's usually enough science out there to say that as part of a balanced diet and exercise plan, it will help you. Because guess what? If you're fat and you're doing no exercise at all and you don't have a balanced diet, then if you switch to those things,

then inevitably you're going to see results and you can't really disprove that it was the weight loss or the toning product or the diet milkshake or the running shoe that helped you along the way so the outlawing of the product that he refers to in the 1970s was when the fda the american food and drug administration did ban a rival product to slender tone called the relaxer sizer was that the one that um used to give people orgasms or was that one just in fiction you're thinking of elizabeth marcy madman aren't you yeah i am but that was giant rubber exercise pant things uh i don't know but it was one of the so all of these things um the product category is ems electrical muscle stimulation machines they give sharp sharp electric shocks to your stomach, and the theory is that they tone your muscles. And basically what's happened is it's now become okay to say that it tones your muscles because that is provable. It isn't okay to say that it

can help you with weight loss because it can, as part of a balanced diet, yada, yada, yada. It can't by itself. And so the relaxer sizer was banned because potentially it was unhealthy and dangerous to users, but primarily because it was being marketed for weight loss so slender tone are really careful now that they don't market for weight loss they market for muscle toning and the thing is there are some recent studies that show that toning up your muscles using a slender tone does result in weight loss but it's a bit like what i was saying before it could be that if your muscles are in better shape you're more likely to do some exercise, which would then contribute to weight loss.

It's not directly the slender tone doing it, but you are more toned as a result. The unsettling thing is that it's clearly marketed, these products are clearly marketed at people who think that if you just put this $100 product onto your stomach and then sit on the sofa and eat chocolate, you'll lose weight. And whether it's done through insinuation or whether it's explicit that is what they're selling and that is bollocks i can imagine ways in which slendertone would have genuine medical use as well like if you needed something to to stimulate your muscles or circulation yeah because at the time you were unable to

you know move well stuff like that. Have you ever passed an electrical current through yourself? Well, when our washing machine broke and flooded through to the floor below and I hit a light switch with my hand rather than thinking, oh, I should use my hairbrush handle or something, then yes. But, I mean, it didn't throw me across the room or anything. I did a piss once on an electric fence. Oh! Did it sting you?

Isn't that kind of what kills him in the ice storm? Actually, no, I'm misremembering, in fact. My friend did a piss on the electric fence, and it was very funny watching him get stung. Actually, all that happened is that I lent on it. So I felt it, like, in my back. Actually, as you asked me the question, I was like, no, I haven't been electrocuted

to the cock before, so no, that didn't happen. I think it was at a low voltage. It was for cattle. Did the electricity go up your friend's stream of pierced right into his urethra and he was flung backwards? No. But there was an amusing tingle that was not pleasant. Which is actually how I would describe the feeling

of leaning on it as well. Like at first it feels like someone just stung you or something. So you don't move. You just think, oh, what's that? But you don't think I need to get off this thing because you think it's happened. And then it happens again. And you're like, oh, okay, I'm leaning on an electric fence. I'm a dickhead.

None of us are saying that having an electric shock is comfortable. Sure. I'd sort of forgotten about Slender Tone, but I think in the 80s and early to mid 90s, I saw ads for it in like colour supplements all the time. But a lot of the people who then tried them out were like, it really, really hurts. And now it just seems like as long as you use it responsibly, it's not that painful. The thing about sort of dubious exercise products is they're worse on the market than Slendertone.

I mean, I've actually played my part in promoting one, which I feel a little bit guilty about. So I write a technology column for Reader's Digest, which is fine. It's usually just a sort of list of, you know, new products that are out and my opinion on them, and that's fine. But once a year, I report on the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. And there was one year in particular, where everybody, it wasn't just me, everyone who was sent out to ces that year wrote about the happy fork do you remember that is that something that you eat with or does it like go into your flesh it's a smart fork so the idea it was 99 and it was shit but everyone wrote

about it because it was a novelty because it was interesting and you've always got that tension when you're reporting on technology between the things that are genuinely innovative, like a phone battery that lasts a little bit longer but is boring, and the things that are really interesting but obviously bollocks, like a new machine that folds your shirts or whatever. And, you know, you want your coverage to have a bit of everything in it. And everybody wrote about this fucking fork. And, you know, it gave it Google rankings.

It meant that people took this wacky gadget seriously. in it and everybody wrote about this fucking fork and it you know it gave it google rankings it meant that people took this wacky gadget seriously and all it was was a fork that could sync with your smartphone so that then if it sensed that you were eating like chewing too quickly it would vibrate and tell you to slow down wow yeah having a vibrating object next to your teeth seems potentially risky yeah i think the vibration was at the very end of the handle and obviously it's the metal bit that's in your mouth that does make more sense but even so charging a fork i mean just that no one does that you're not going to hand wash it and then dock it are you after dinner i mean it's just completely absurd but like i say

i sort of i i don't feel that guilty because i wrote about it as if to say this is a slightly absurd thing but hey look at this but the problem is if everyone shines a light on something that stupid that in itself gives it a kind of credibility and that's the problem isn't it with the diet and weight loss industries there's so much stuff like that that is trying i suppose to underpin a noble suggestion you know eat slower because that's better for you but then manifests itself in a completely ridiculous way which seems to undermine the science i mean i feel like this stuff's relatively benign like it's kind of a bit silly but there's plenty of stuff in the wellness industry which is actively harmful or like you know body pressure stick or whatever so i don't know like if you want to buy a vibrating fork knock yourself out not with the vibrating fork if you can have it. When I was in intensive care and kind of in the drug sleep,

as we've talked about in previous episodes. Yeah, all your anecdotes now. Oh, when I was in hospital, when I was in a coma. We can all go into a medically induced coma if we want to, Helen. Don't though. I was on this bed that it was almost like a living object because it was like gently sighing around my body to keep my circulation going. And I was like gently sighing around my body to keep like

my circulation going and i had these like gators around my calves they look like j-cloths but they were also kind of massaging my calves right it was very relaxing was that about trying to keep your blood flowing then yeah and stop dvt yeah stopping blood clots and things like that but it's also just quite nice it's like oh i'm not alone i've got a sentient bed i was there i came to see you all the time you just were hanging out with your sentient bed you didn't want to talk to me that's the kind of product that you could imagine going mainstream though couldn't you because there is a benefit to having your blood being pumped around your body i know that's what your heart is doing yep it seems essential really yeah but it can't hurt to have a bed helping you

do that as well i imagine and actually that if's relaxing, there's maybe a gap in the market for that. A lot of people... Look at all the mattress companies online, Helen. A lot of people willing to spend money on their beds. It probably could hurt if your sentient bed took a dislike to you. Sure. I mean, I'm not suggesting that they use as their slogan, it can't hurt. It probably hurts less than whatever's landed you in the sentient bed.

This lands us at the end of another episode of Answer Me This. Thump. Ow. But we need your questions for a future episode of Answer Me This. Otherwise, there cannot be one. Yeah. So if you have a question, all our contact details are upon our website. AnswerMeThisPodcast.com

And I will just reiterate that the easiest way to ask us a question using your own voice is to record yourselves on your phone's voice memo yeah and email it to us via the email address so let's do the bit where we do some self-promotion uh helen you have a podcast called the illusionist it's really good and people should listen to it oh yeah it's fucking great the most recent episode it's it's got roller derby talking about the roller derby names great use of the phrase roller derby it doesn't come up that often in my life so i'm embracing it while i have the opportunity do it while you can like roller derby itself uh also 1930s and 40s crime novelists also end in is and their pseudonyms

they had because it was so shameful um and a poet laureate was a popular crime novelist and couldn't do it under his own name and also uh i found out why corpses in american uh dramas are called john doe if they don't know the real name and it was like an absolute fucking load of mayhem oh good because i think we may have once been asked that question on answer me this or discussed it badly so i'm glad you've done something more authoritative it's it's really difficult but also the illusionist is on tour of australia and new zealand so go to the illusionist.org slash events and come along to see me and martin brett from flight of the concords was at one of our new zealand gigs and he said it was good i mean he's he's the best kiwi celebrity though isn't he so if he's already been well i suppose you could get jermaine i'd say he and

jermaine are their best equals i'm just saying if you go to another one of your new zealand gigs you're not going to see someone from flight of the Conchords, probably. Someone who was at the gig in Auckland was David Bowie's China Girl. Oh, yes. Yep, not as good as Brett from Flight of the Conchords, sorry. She also liked the gig. So New Zealand's finest say the gig is good. So come and see the show. Theillusionist.org slash event is new stuff.

It's not been on the podcast. Oliver Mann, what's going on with you and your myriad projects? The Modern Man is back as of now. Yay! It is a monthly magazine show. It is not just for men. It's just a pun on my name. Modernmanwith2ends.co.uk.

That's where you can find it. Every episode has stuff about trends and sex and music. But more importantly, there is a long-form interview in the middle between me and someone with an incredible story. And wow. there is a long-form interview in the middle between me and someone with an incredible story and wow this this episode we've just put out is an absolute stonker it's about a teacher but i actually can't really tell you anything else that happens in it which is a problem when you're marketing something but you know it's one of those stories that you just don't want to spoil you want to listen to the story and hear every twist and turn but it is a story you've never heard anywhere else and yeah check it out don't don't even look at the show notes don't look at the blog just open up the modern man with two n's on your podcast app now

the episode is called pupil a and it is fascinating also modern man is up for a british podcast award this month oh well i couldn't possibly i couldn't possibly dwell on that yes i heard on the uh on the news wires jo. Yes, thank you. I heard on the news wires. Jolly well done. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. And a previous British Podcast Award winner, of course,

is Martin with his podcast Song by Song. Song by Song, which we talk about every Tom White song in chronological order. You can find that at songbysongpodcast.com. I'm also releasing a song a week as part of Year of the Bird, songs I wrote on the road travelling around the world in 2018 Did you make it to Budapest or were you too hammered? The current song is called The Empire Strikes Back

and it's about being in Kyoto in Japan and finding a bus sign in an antique shop which has a load of Midlands places that I grew up around and it was recorded on a train so you can go to palebirdmusic.com and listen to those tracks and pre-order the album What, you recorded a song on a train. So you can go to palebirdmusic.com and listen to those tracks and pre-order the album. What, you recorded a song on a train? Yeah, well, not in the music.

I recorded the sort of, it's like a spoken word thing. So yeah, we were stuck in the station at Toyama. Billy Bragg did a whole concept album on a train. Did he? Yeah, it's quite good actually. And yet when people get on the train and they're busking, everyone's like, if it's Billy Bra bragg doing it fine uh remember as well our first 200 episodes are available to buy at answer me this store.com where you can also find our

albums of exclusive content and you can donate to the show which helps us make the show and you can also buy our exclusive albums the newest royal Baby is due out any day now, so why not listen to the Answer Me This Jubilee, which has a lot of interesting facts about the monarchy. Sure. And we'll be back halfway through the month with a retro Answer Me This, and back on the first Thursday of June with a fresh new Answer Me This.

Bye!