Answer Me This! - AMT387: Bear Nipples, Easy-Bake Ovens and Salmon Vending Machines

Episode Date: July 2, 2020

In AMT387 questioneers want to know how pregnancy tests work, how many nipples bears have, why there are salmon vending machines in Singapore, and how to deal with old friends who don't know you have amnesia. Find out more about this episode at . Send us questions for future episodes: email written words or voice recordings to [e-mail]. Tweet us Facebook Our new album Home Entertainment is available now for £paywhatyouwant for a limited period at , where you can also obtain our other special albums, AMT episodes 1-200, and our Best Of compilations. Hear our other work: Helen Zaltzman's podcasts The Allusionist at and Veronica Mars Investigations at ; Olly Mann's five podcasts including , The Week Unwrapped, and The Media Podcast at ; and Martin Austwick's music at and his Tom Waits podcast Song By Song at . This episode is sponsored by: The Great Courses Plus, the streaming library of courses on topics from wine to mystery fiction to yoga to formal logic to dog training. AMT listeners get a free month at . Squarespace. Want to build a website? Go to , and get a 10% discount on your first purchase of a website or domain with the code 'ANSWER'. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is the Hamilton film about Christine O'Neill? Did the dancing baby grow old with Ali McBeal? Okay, stop everything and emails come in from my mum. It begins. Dear Helen and Oliver. Very formal. Thank you for a very entertaining hour of fun and interest. Ah, has she been listening to the Home Entertainment album?

She has. As ever, you gelled swimmingly well and interjected with humour. Well done indeed. Thank you. That is sort of the principle of the piece. It's like a five-star review so far, Ollie. Only one fly in the ointment. And then she's put ellipses, but she's done that thing, you know,

where people, rather than doing three dots, put like 11. She knows how to play things for drama. She's an actor. That's right. Please, please, Helen. If the subject of me dressed in PVC holding a whip comes up, obviously it might. I need reassurance that an explanation accompanies such a statement.

Okay. You did mention having seen such a photo in the Home Entertainment album. She says, the said photo was for ugly model agency who specialise in the portrayal of unique characters. So the said image was part of a collage featuring several characters. Five exclamation marks, much obliged, three exclamation marks. Well, I'm terribly sorry. Although, gotta say, Karen, you pull off the outfit and the expression excellently. marks much obliged three exclamation marks well i'm terribly sorry although you've got to say

karen you pull off the outfit and the expression excellently you've got the range she's actually recently dug out a load of her old publicity shots which she used to take to auditions because you know pre-websites that's what you did if you were a jobbing actor yeah i'm in some of them as a part of the collage so there's like one of her doing the kind of gypsy crystal ball thing and then there's one of her doing the i'm the sultry girl next door thing and then i'm in the middle which i suppose is the kind of venn diagram between the two well i can play mums yeah exactly right exactly that i know we live in a different world now in so many ways but it lists her height and her hair and her eye colour, but also her bust size and glove size.

I mean, she did do hand modelling. Well, that makes sense because I was thinking otherwise, is it for period dramas where they need to know if they have enough gloves in the wardrobe? Yes, for hand modelling, it makes sense. But considering she used it for acting as well, I just can't imagine a casting director, you know, at the RSC being like, no, Lady Macbeth has size six gloves.

It cannot be seven. It's got to be six. I've seen very few pictures of my mother that predate my lifetime. But I did recently see a couple of my parents' wedding pictures, which I had not seen before. And she has very strong help me eyes in them. So do you think that is a cry for help? Or do you think it is just that she was a bit overwhelmed maybe by having her photo taken? I mean, you're not someone who naturally likes having your picture taken. So that's the moment being captured. She likes it even less. But I think maybe something in her saw how the next 49 and three quarters years were going to play out.

50th anniversary this year. And yesterday she said to me, don't you dare do anything to celebrate it michael who lives in singapore uh says i recently discovered that singapore has the world's first salmon vending machine it's got like 12 of the world's first salmon vending machines right he's attached a photo so we can see proof that one certainly exists yeah it's a salmon vending machine all right it is exactly if you imagine a salmon vending machine, all right. It is. If you imagine a salmon vending machine, that's what it is. You can now purchase Norwegian salmon, he says, at any time of the day or night, 24-7. Yes, I think Norwegian salmon is the name of the company.

Right. So it gives the gist that the salmon is Norwegian, but it's possible that it isn't. Fish is an odd product, he says, to sell in a vending machine for obvious hygiene and foodborne illness reasons. Well, is it more weird because a vending machine can be refrigerated and airtight? So is that more weird than an open counter in a climate that is as warm as Singapore? Yeah, fish markets. What's that about?

Actually, I think a sealed vending machine is a perfectly reasonable place to buy a piece of fish. I wish we had them here. You just stick your mouth by the exit slot and just let the salmon shoot in there. Helen asked me this. What other weird and potentially lethal food products are available in vending machines? And whilst you're at it, when did we start putting such food in these machines and why? Okay, so the salmon vending machines he's talking about, it is frozen, vacuum-packed, 200 gram pieces of salmon.

And the vending machines are minus 20 Celsius. So I think that's pretty hygienic as as salmon storage goes they've been around for a bit over a year i suppose what's odd about it is that it's a convenience isn't it a vending machine and salmon doesn't feel like a convenience product in britain it feels like a luxury but also what what situation are you in where you're on the street and you need 200 grams of frozen salmon well you might just be on your way home and think shit i don't have anything to cook for dinner yeah but michael asks about other weird products available in vending machines and it surprised me more that singapore has ready to eat chili crab in vending machines again you

wouldn't think um particularly a convenience item. Oh shit, I'm out of chilli crab. It's just not something I've ever thought. Well, it is delicious though, Oli. Maybe that was a thing in Singapore. And you can also get pizza made from scraps so you can watch the machine spreading the stuff on the dough.

That's fun. Oh, you know what was fun like that was getting my cat collar done at Pets at Home on the machine. You can see it being inscribed. Oh yes, yes, that is really fun. i didn't even mind that he lost it twice in the first month because i was just like i'm gonna go and get another one oh then in japan i remember seeing vending machines of lots of kinds including you know one of those fairground grabbers yeah

they have one of those but for desserts like cake so hold on so there's a chance that you put your money in and you don't get any cake? Yeah, well, that's the game. Well, sure, I know. But it's one thing, isn't it, to have a food reward in a game context, like when you're in a casino or a seaside attraction. But when you're in a supermarket, to put an element of risk into a food transaction feels like something I don't want to do.

Yeah, although you can probably overall get more money for some cakes out of people who want to play to get the cake than you can if they could just buy the cake without the thrill of the chase it sounds like there will be blood i grab the cake i grab it all up and then it drops because the game is rigged uh but he asks why we start putting such food in vending machines then i would argue that that would be first when there were automats, which was a style of restaurant. I think the first one was in Germany in 1895, where it was a bit like a diner. But you would put a coin in a slot next to the food that you wanted to buy. And then like a little door would open and you could take the slice of pie or whatever it was but behind these sort of machine operators was the kitchen where they

were making the pies putting them on a plate putting them behind the little doors so there's a lot of restaurants in japan these days that are basically that aren't they yeah well they were very popular like i think new york had a lot of them and then when fast food restaurants started to catch on the automats kind of died off but like it's all about the 50s they were really popular we had a similar experience in Osaka didn't we where we went to a vending machine outside a restaurant punched in what we wanted paid for it got a little ticket and just took that ticket into a small place with a cook who actually prepared it which is a bit like an automat it just avoided the embarrassment of not being able to speak any Japanese and not knowing what the hell was going

on it seemed quite efficient it's more of a surprise to me some of the non-food items such things as army supplies and gold ingots and um in the usa and airports between the 50s and the 70s apparently there were vending machines selling life insurance policies covering death in the event of a plane crash wow yes that's so it's not a hygiene problem but it seems a little bit grim you still get odd vending machines at airports though don't you you get them for like expensive headphones i've seen yes well like expensive beauty products i could understand paying a fiver for something that you couldn't like try on your hand but when it's like 30 quid benefit isn't it have a series of benefit yeah that's the one that weirds me out the most the benefit machines at the airport yeah but i see what they're doing there though because their

brand is like 1950s kitsch it's americana is what they're tapping into i think but yeah bearing in mind that every time i've tried to get a cadbury's whole nut out of a vending machine on the tube it's eaten my money i wouldn't want to put 40 quid in for some eyelashes you know there's a number you can call there and they'll send you a voucher for like £1.20 yeah it's really not worth your time but it it can happen and I know that you love to pursue a consumer complaint well nor is the chocolate worth £1.20 in the first place that's the thing you're paying a premium for the for the placement of those machines and yet every time I fall for it. Every time. Hello, this is Joe in Seattle, and Helen and Ollie answer me this. How many nipples do bears have? Because they don't have many offsprings, so maybe two or four? Something in between?

It does vary a bit bear by bear. The general answer I seem to find is four to six. But often it's like they effectively have four nipples and then two that are kind of residual nipples that either don't do anything or like they are the first nipples the bear gets. Because like bear cubs seem to be born like really, really small. Like they're not that developed after gestating. And usually like with a brown bear or black bear,

like it happens while they're hibernating in the den so tiny bear is born and then like manages to crawl to the nearest pair of nipples and like latches onto those and then basically stays nursing for about 150 days jesus until they go outside they'll start off on the bottom set of nipples and then once they're big enough they'll go up to the top four. Like an adjustable cot. Right, yeah, just levelling up. So apparently first time mother bears, I think this is black or brown bears, they tend to have one cub but then subsequent pregnancies will be two. So it makes sense to have spares.

And do male presenting bears also have nipples as humans do or is it just females in the bear kingdom? There's surprisingly not as much information about bears nipples that I was able to access on the internet without going down the wrong paths. I read that black bears the females have six nipples but the males only have two. Right okay. Polar bears also have four nipples that work and then they may have two non-functioning nipples towards the back so like near the vagina there is there's two nipples that don't really do anything so is that just waiting to be evolutioned out then yeah i guess so because i read about um selenodons which are like little shrews rodent things oh yeah they have nipples on their arses but those are their functioning nipples wow

and i was thinking why but actually what you said about crawling to the nipple for the because you think about babies humans obviously pass the baby to the nipple often with some difficulty but nonetheless an adult's there to pick them up i hadn't really thought about in the natural world the baby's born and has to find its own nipple sometimes makes sense i guess for the proximity to be right there yeah it sort of makes sense to have some of the nipples on the arse as well because uh i mean it's a little bit easier for the front of the uh selenodon to do stuff reminds me a bit of marsupials because it's like when marsupials are born they're really really tiny aren't they yeah well i was reading about a marsupial i was reading about the opossum so after just 12 days an opossum baby will be born with

only nine percent of their brain developed wow and they're blind and they're deaf still but they do have massive claws they can climb up the mother's body into the pouch then they latch onto the teat and don't let go for two months the nipples swell inside their mouths creating an almost unbreakable lock wow and then the opossum's nipple will stretch and grow up to 35 times its original length. One day, the BBC Earth department will make a 12-part box set just about nipples. And I'm here for that.

Yeah, very interesting. Planet nipples. Do you know, I only realised the other day, I'm not embarrassed to say, I just hadn't thought about it, that mammals are only called mammals because we have mammary glands and we feed via nipples that's our thing yeah i also read that there's only like 6 000 kinds of mammals which didn't seem that much given how many arachnids

there are still 6 000 episodes of nipple earth lots to get through if you've got a question, email it in. To Martin the sound man, Holly and Helen. Answer me this podcast at googlemail.com. Answer me this podcast at googlemail.com So retrospectives, what historical events are we ticking off on this week's run of Today in History? On Monday, we bring you the real story of the mutiny on the bounty. On Tuesday, the anniversary of the day somebody invented the meatball, but who? On Wednesday, the iconic British car that ripped off an iconic American car. On Thursday, how American airlines invented air miles.

And on Friday, the UFO sighting that gripped colonial America. We discuss this and more on Today in History with The Retrospectors. Ten minutes each weekday, wherever you get your podcasts. Here's an email with an incredible first sentence from Katie from Birmingham, who says, I got amnesia when I was at university. Wowee. I was able, she says, to retain information from things that were constant during that time, such as family and close friends, but forgot most of my childhood memories and had to relearn my entire course, which was a huge bummer oh that is i mean all the emotional stuff seems like an awful lot to bear but just that practical part oh fucking hell that's unfair

yeah because like like learning to walk again if that's necessary that is important the you before the amnesia would have been able to say whether it was worth doing the lectures again but then you wouldn't remember whether it was worth doing the lectures again. I now get into odd situations, she says, where someone who knew me before the amnesia sees me in the street and then comes to talk to me. Oh, Lord. I have to politely inform them that I've had an illness which caused me to lose all memory of them.

So, sorry, I do not remember, quote, that really funny time when. Do people have seen too many light comedy films where amnesia is just sort of played as a funny joke and a bit of a romantic like memento obstacle i wouldn't say memento is a light comedy but okay what were you thinking of because i can't think of any but maybe if you reminded me ironically i would remember i suppose 50 first dates that's the sort of amnesia rom-com it's true barrymore and adam sandler whereas actually in reality that would be very difficult in a relationship it's a lot for everyone concerned to deal with i imagine be very hard as well for you know your family and friends you could well be hard for your family and friends if you're dating adam sandler period ah and yet just uh

this short email we've had from katie makes it seem like not a super rom-com kind of ailment anyway uh here's the question no matter how much I stress that I've lost all memories before the age of 20, people seem either a little hurt they didn't make the cut into things that I do remember, or are just really weirded out that they're now talking to someone who might as well be a stranger to them. So Helen answered me this. How do I go about letting people down gently? Is there something I can say to the people that I inadvertently offend? Or is there some way for me to pretend that I know these people without

getting into the details of my illness? I think firstly, I would just like to say I'm not well qualified to answer this question because I have never had amnesia, nor been a person who knows someone with amnesia. Or treated amnesia for that matter right sure bare nipples you were fine to wade in on but i'm an expert on those i will say i feel like it's unfair that the onus is on you to make them feel better yes given that this is far more of an inconvenience for you all day every day than it is for them occasionally bumping into you yeah and actually that's why it's important i think that she doesn't pretend yeah you know she says is there some way for me to pretend no because this isn't your problem you shouldn't have to pretend that should be the's why it's important, I think, that she doesn't pretend. Yeah. You know, she says, is there some way for me to pretend? No, because this isn't your problem. You shouldn't have to pretend. That should be the opening principle.

It's also so uncommon that, A, the person would be really surprised, and B, probably spending the first minute or so working out, like, is this person being serious or is this, like, a prank they're playing on me? Because it just seems like a joke. Obviously, it's not a joke. It's a serious thing. But if I walked up to someone on the street that i know and went oh hi and they went i've got amnesia i don't remember you i just i'd find it very very strange so there's maybe

something where you can store for time and give them an adjustment period it'd be quite useful yeah that's probably quite wise to consider how they're feeling too yeah but i'd imagine like if they're people that are more than passing acquaintances then they will have had time to absorb this information yeah but you wouldn't know would're people that are more than passing acquaintances, then they would have had time to absorb this information. Yeah, but you wouldn't know, would you, whether they are more than passing acquaintances? That's the issue. Yeah, well, I wonder whether if they become a part of Katie's present life,

whether she is able to remember them or how it works. I mean, we don't have the detail on how the condition is playing out now. If you do have friends in your life still from school you know the close friends that you said you retained i wonder whether you could kind of get them on your side where they kind of pass this information on to the wider circle of school acquaintances you know they could do it in a gossipy way but with intent that people know and so when they meet you they are prepared and they're like oh hi katie uh we went to school together and my name is blah blah blah

yeah part of it i think is there's them knowing what they're navigating and not making more work for you but i wonder also whether if there's anything that you have learned since about what happened at school that you could then just deploy in a kind of moving things on quickly and distracting them situation where you could be like I got amnesia so I'm really trying to fill in the gaps I heard that this and this happened can you confirm that just get them onto like reminiscing about a thing like something they could tell you that's clever yeah but also then they feel helpful I guess that the issue is it's open to abuse isn't it for that person if they weren't if they were the school bully.

They've got an option to say, oh, yeah, we were great friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we used to hang out together and school was great, bye. Well, what if Katie was the school bully, though? And they were like, I always feared you. Then you made my life hell. Oh, then you'd be basically Jason Bourne, wouldn't you?

Like, you know, whole skills that you've forgotten about that you're now able to recall on and you don't know why yeah why have i got four passports and the ability to kill someone with just ordinary household items that's again the thing though like the way that amnesia is uh kind of played for shock and laughs in media i think is probably not helping katie with just the mundanity of day-to-day life if harold bishop hadn't fallen off a cliff and been washed into the sea, I wouldn't know what amnesia was or I wouldn't have learnt what amnesia was until I was about 18.

Whereas I did learn it when I was 10 because of Madge's plight, yeah. So actually, I think it's not a subject that drama should avoid completely because it does educate people. Yeah, I just think there are certain ways in which it has educated people incorrectly. Yeah, well, yeah. Harold remembered everything after a year

and joined the Salvation Army. That was fine. I suppose the other option is just to don a disguise whenever you're out and about. Well, just deflect. I mean, actually, you know, that's what I do when I don't recognise someone who comes up to me is I deflect with generic questions.

How are you? Are you working today? Oh, it's been a while since we last saw each other hoping that in their answers I will then suddenly remember who they are yeah I mean Katie you know that you're not going to suddenly remember but actually the technique could remain the same couldn't they may reveal themselves without you having to say anything you might be able to piece together enough for you to be able to have a basic how are you conversation i suppose katie if you are really uh not too bothered about this person you just really need this to be a small talk exchange and nothing more just ask them where they're going or where they've come from and then you don't even have to say oh how the kids oh you don't have any oh i couldn't remember this

happened to me in the past where a stranger has come up to me and obviously mistaken me and because i was too polite to be like i I don't know who you are. It's probably a 60-second conversation along the lines of like, oh, hi, how's it going? How are things? Are you still in the same job? Who broke it off? He saw me a long way away on Hungerford Bridge

and shouted someone's name. And I had my headphones in so I didn't hear what name he shouted. So then I went over and went, oh, hi, how's it going? And he kind of looked like a dude that I might have met at a party five years ago but this is a fun beginning

for a romcom Helen how many social networks are you on Vibo, Friendster, Parkview, Porn Myspace, Ping and Google Buzz if you want to be

our pal, go to this URL facebook.com slash answer me this or twitter.com slash Helen and Dolly. But please don't follow us in real life.

Thank you to our sponsors, The Great Courses Plus, who bring world-class professors into your home without you having to kidnap anyone. Or without you even having to get dressed in academically suitable clothes. Or at all, watch it in bed. Yeah, I guess so. I was watching it in my pyj on the sofa uh just this morning i was watching food a cultural culinary history and what did you learn well it's super interesting i i was

watching the episode food imperialism around the world because i'd been spending quite a lot of time recently wondering about colonialization cultural appreciation cultural appropriation where ingredients originated versus where they are associated with and there's a lot to get into and covers a lot of ground this series it basically covers a lot of human history via food from the stone age to the present i've also actually been watching a culinary uh lecture series i've been um enjoying the everyday guide to wine oh yeah there's a winemaster she has some really useful mnemonics actually so that you can appear to know what you're doing oh yeah give us a mnemonic.

Chest, chin, nose. Basically, when you're doing that thing where you sniff the wine, instead of sticking your nose right in it, what the connoisseur does is chest, chin, nose, so that you properly get the bouquet. So you put the glass first on your chest, sort of under your breastbone, then on your chin chin and then you sniff again and then in your nose so you can smell the difference of the various different approaches of

the wine as it comes towards your face rather than just sticking your head right in it anyway you can discover uh whatever you like about food imperialism or wine or a bunch of i mean like loads of other courses everything absolutely everything you can imagine business history travel and we can offer you an entire month of unlimited access to the great courses plus for free just for being a listener to answer me this ah well done you sign up today at our special url to get started that is the great courses plus dot com slash answer that is the great coursesoursesplus.com slash answer. Here's a question from Beth from Sheffield who says,

I have been spending a lot of time browsing YouTube lately. And the other day I came across a video of the drag queen Trixie Mattel making tiny little pretzels in an Easy Bake oven. You and half a million others. Beth says, I've spent the past 28 years regularly consuming American media. So I was vaguely aware of Easy Bake ovenvens, but had no idea how awesome they were. When I was a kid, I went through a phase of constantly badgering my busy mum and dad to help me make biscuits and cupcakes in the actual oven, so a toy that lets kids make real edible treats with minimal supervision and less chance of burning the house down would have been perfect for me. If I had ever seen an advert for an Easy Bake Oven,

I'm sure the eight-year-old me would have sold her little soul for it, or just begged my parents for it for my birthday. But after a bit of Googling, I can't find any reference to Easy Bake Ovens ever being available in the UK. The only way to get one, it seems, is to order one on Amazon from an American seller for several hundred pounds. Well, I have found one for £83, but that is discounted from £138, and that's still three times the price of the US RRP of $40, and presumably would incur extra costs in swapping

the voltage around. Olly, answer me this. Why is this? Is there something in the oven that is considered dangerous by British standards? Why mustish children be denied tiny pretzels well uh to quote yourself back at you beth there is less chance of burning the house down using an easy bake oven than an actual oven but there is still a very real chance so i suspect ultimately for the past say two or three decades uh heightened culture of health and safety actually that's really been the reason is that it is a bit of a fire risk this toy right i can't find the smoking gun uh or the smoking molten plastic toy but i presume there is an eu regulation somewhere that would prohibit the sale of an easy bake oven because not only can you not buy it anywhere in europe there's also not an equivalent product that's made. Oh, do you think after Brexit, then Britain will set fire to itself with toy ovens?

Quite possibly. But I think the reason as to why there wasn't a British version of this hugely popular American toy, I mean, it sold half a million units in its first year in the USA, is actually a cultural one. The toy was released in 1963. And I think it's easy to forget these days in a world of Great British Bake Off and everyone fetishizing Greg's Sausage Rolls and all the rest of it. I think in 1963, baked goods just weren't as big a deal for children here in the UK as they were in the USA. I mean, they have a sweeter tooth in North America, which is still the case. I mean, you go there and you're always overwhelmed

by the amount of options and that there are restaurants like Dairy Queen that just do ice cream and all the rest of it. But I mean, then especially, and the whole kind of home-baked apple pie thing, it's more of an American cultural thing. I disagree. I think Britain has like a very strong cake culture

that goes back a very long way. But I think in 1963, people weren't necessarily buying such extravagant toys for their children. I think there was probably still less disposable income. More of a post-war approach. Yeah, exactly. Even though rationing had been lifted and all of that. So it's either like you're old enough to use a proper oven or you can fucking play with fake food. That's all. There's no in between. How hot does an easy bake oven go

i thought it was just a light bulb that gently warmed things that were already edible but no historically it was two 100 watt bulbs uh you can't even buy those bulbs anymore and it would go as hot as 350 degrees fahrenheit celsius fahrenheit yeah enough to dry out a cookie but now they use a heating element so it's not actually light bulb powered anymore i mean however many safety checks they put on at the end of the day it's got a heating element in it why are you letting your children play with that unsupervised they're still age eight and up i was using the real oven by the time i was eight and there's nothing wrong with that like actually that's a responsible thing to do isn't it teach your kids

how to uh effectively and safely use a kitchen yeah but i think the easy bake doesn't help with that like i understand the theory that it might because it gives them a sense of you have to put the cold food in and it comes out hot but it because they try and seal off some of the dangers like the door on the front doesn't open for example what you slide stuff in the side um it probably gives you a false expectation of how safe an oven really is although like because you're sliding food in sideways because they've sealed the door it probably gives you a false expectation of how safe an oven really is. Although, because you're sliding food in sideways, because they've sealed the door, you can't clean it.

Not properly. You can just stick a spray in there, but you can't get in and work around all the crap in there, and then you eat what comes out from inside. Or do you? Or are you just like, that's lovely, dear? Well, that's the other thing, isn't it? You're giving your children a gift that is then repeated on you every time they cook something.

You've got to taste this shit. I've never been super keen to eat something that a child has made me. Here's another question of Cakes from Vincent who says, answer me this, what is the etymology of the word flapjack? Ah. Why and when did its use in the UK and North America diverge and do other countries use the word? It is also a wrestling move.

Is that when you've rolled oats in your opponent's face? It's more distraction tactic than something that's going to make them down for the count, isn't it? I wasn't aware there was a distinction between the American approach to flapjacks and the British. Can you delineate that first? Yeah, so in Britain, we know the flapjack as a dense, sweetened oat bar, like a tray bake, often with raisins or chocolate chips in or bits of nut. Whereas in the USA, flapjack just means a pancake. They have so many terms that just mean pancake, I guess because language is regional, but pancakes are quite a widespread food stuff the american style pancake i'm thinking

the buttermilk pancake here is typically thicker yeah fluffy yeah yeah it's that kind so i'm just wondering whether flapjack in any way suggests a more european style of pancake or not really actually and this is going to upset some people that kind of flapjack is much earlier than the oat flapjack. Wow. Yep. It's in the Shakespeare play Pericles. Someone's like, let's go off and eat flapjacks. Is that really what they said?

Well, I'm paraphrasing because I don't speak Shakespearean. But then if Shakespeare was writing it in Britain, how could he possibly be referring to the pancake flapjack from North America? No, the point is not that the flapjack itself is American. It's that the term means what it means in America before it means the British way. People always assume that if it's an Americanism, it's newfangled. But that is often not the case. There's a great book, The Prodigal Tongue by Lynn Murphy, if you want to get more into US and British English differences, and might stop you getting so arrogant about which the right one is so the word is at least 400 ish years old it meant kind of a variety of things so it could have meant a flat tart or a turnover

or a pancake or just like a dessert cooked in a flat pan and flipped so the flap was just you flip it and the jack apparently was either just like a generic term for an object so it just meant flipped thing, or more specifically, a smallish thing. So a flipped smallish thing. But the oat bar meaning is only about 100 years old. Right. I think where that originates from is essentially like people using up cold porridge. So they'd make a big vat of porridge, have it hot in the morning, then leave it to solidify and cut it into cubes and fry that

up and use that as a savory or a sweet carb yes and also there's this myth that i that is very widespread but without a lot of proof to it that in scotland they would cook up the porridge in the morning eat it and then pour it into a drawer and have a porridge drawer where they would cut the uh the slices of it out of. Maybe that's what was in Alan Partridge's hotel room drawer. In the 90s I hired a 12-person web team to build and run my websites and realise my tech dream. Then the dot-com bubble burst and I had to drown them in a stream.

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usually when a woman does an at-home pregnancy test, it'll show up one for pregnant and two for not, or vice versa. But Helen asked me this. What would happen if I, a man, tried it? Well, it might still come up with a positive result, because it's looking for a hormone, a human chorionic gonadotropin, or HCG, and that's not exclusive to pregnant people. It does start to be produced about six days after fertilization, but that is not the only thing that can make it detectable. It can happen

as a result of certain medications, such as steroids, or some people take it to stimulate testosterone, or if you are undergoing fertility treatment, it might be present in your piss. But it is also an indication of cancer. Now, just if you decide to take a pregnancy test, and it comes out positive, it doesn't necessarily mean that you, Ryan, have cancer. But I also wouldn't recommend taking a pregnancy test just to reassure yourself that you don't okay um but um it is a hormone that is released by several kinds of cancerous tumors right but that must apply for people with wombs as well right yeah but i suppose that the point is that the presence of it in someone with a womb who's thinking they might be pregnant is much more likely to indicate pregnancy than not yes i would say whether you have a womb or you don't, and you get a positive result on

the pregnancy test, it is worth seeking a medical opinion. But I wouldn't use one of these ones that Ryan's explaining here, actually, with one for pregnant, two for not, or vice versa, because that kind of 80s filing system of indicative results was spurned by us. We went for the Idiot's Guide pregnancy kit, which just says pregnant if you're pregnant. It's worth it. It's worth the extra two quid because they're really expensive anyway. It was like a choice of do you spend £14 or £18? Spend the £18. Let's get the digital read that says very clearly pregnant so that we know. Here's a question from Donna from Cornwall who says,

I have seen a number of police cars and other emergency services in different countries. They all have blue flashing lights. Ollie, answer me this. Why are the lights blue? Who decided on this and why? I'm now thinking of the title sequence from Police Squad. Most older police cars actually used to have a single red light to indicate stop particularly in the usa um that was the predominant thing red light stop when you see us and in fact the original rotating gumball light was red uh that was called

the beacon ray and introduced in 1948 but you are right donna that blue has since become pretty much the universal color it wasn't anyone's one decision it was just because it stands out better like internationally most cars have red as their brake light and so blue sticks out more it does make you think what's that and also i'd imagine underneath the orange glow of sodium lamps blue also is more visible yeah except at airports that's the only place police at the airport on the airside always use amber so that they're more visible to pilots and they're not confused with landing lights on the runway if they were blue whoa that would be bad and also since 9-11 you do see green emergency lights as well i mean i say you see i've never

seen it but apparently that's used for counter-terrorism homeland security agencies and government private security agencies if they're protecting high-risk infrastructure like i don't know nuclear power station or something or a gas pipeline you might see green spinning lights which would make me think of like the mask or the green goblin or something i wonder why they get a special color that seems to me maybe a own, but obviously they've thought about it more than I have. I suspect, I would fucking hope so. I really hope so. If not, we're in deep shit.

I suppose it might be because it's not for the benefit of the public, actually. It's for the benefit of other emergency service workers. So if you imagine a terrorist event happening, then actually you're going to have lots of blue lights there, aren't you? With, you know, ambulances, police, fire engines, search and rescue, human organs, bomb disposal, blood service, you know, all of that's blue lights. So I guess if you see the green one, then and you're one of the emergency personnel, you move aside for the green people,

because they're coming to try and catch the terrorists. So I suppose that's the point. But yeah, it's a nuanced point that i did not know so thank you for teaching it to me donna by virtue of sending us this question you know sometimes you see a car and it just looks like a normal civilian car and then suddenly it's got blue flashes in the back you know oh that was a plainclothes police car yes but is there any law against putting flashing blue lights in or on your own civilian car? Shit, yes. In the UK, you can only fit an emergency vehicle with not only blue flashing lights, but anything that looks like a blue flashing light.

You can't have a dummy turned off blue light on your car unless you are an emergency vehicle. Even to the extent where some vehicles that would be allowed to use blue flashing lights on private land for example an animal ambulance at a racetrack can't then have that same not turned on blue light fitted to their vehicle when they are on the m25 on the way home so they have to take take it off their roof and shove it in the back you have to take it off the roof yeah because it because it's just, it's against the rules. Except in the case where, for some reason, the police are involved in escorting the injured horse, in which case you would be allowed your blue flashing light on because you're part of the procession of cars

that are under the instruction of the police. Are you allowed to put blue flashing lights on a bike or a horse or other form of transport that's not a car? No, I don't believe so. Nothing, just nothing? No, I think, I mean, I think there's probably discretion there, isn't there? Can you put one on your head and run around going, of transport that's not a car no i don't believe nothing just nothing no i i think i mean i think there's probably discretion there isn't there can you put one on your head and run around going exactly i think generally speaking if a five-year-old does that with disco lights

they'll probably get away with it but uh technically no answer me this you said i could return this pair of tights within 28 days Without affecting my statutory rights Didn't you? Now I'm staying up all night and I'm shaking and shivering with fright Cause you made me replace my living room lights Claiming eco bulbs will be just as bright Didn't you? And I only got this limited sight

And now it's getting too dark to write So I, it's, I don't know Something about Vietnam And Abraham And Steve Krem Here's a question from Daniel Who says my wife and I are in the process Of viewing new places to rent

In one of the properties In the corner of the basement There is a closet with a small lock Installed by the property manager Which, we were told Uh-huh. Uh-huh. I mean, that's just a fact, isn't it? I mean, the owner does have that right. It's a question of how you feel about it. But my wife is worried about the contents and our proximity simply because it's an unknown. Ollie, answer me this. How concerned should I be? And would this alone be a deal breaker on an otherwise fine pick for housing?

Oh, it definitely shouldn't be a deal breaker because it's in the basement. I think if it was in the bedroom, I would understand your wife's concerns much more readily. But I think basement and attic, they're essentially kind of bonus spaces really, aren't they? And I think it's reasonable to sequester some of. And the truth is what's kept in there, I understand the sort of nagging uncertainty. You know, it's this classic kind of where's Craven stuff? What's in the closet. Probably something really boring is the answer. Probably something only relevant to the occasional maintenance of the property. Exactly. It's probably a lawnmower or yeah, some shears. It's probably just something really dull.

Me and my mum actually lease out part of my dad's old business premises. And I've kept a shed on that property. And the only reason is because it's got an old welding machine in it, which is fixed to the floor. It's really heavy. Oh, wow wow and the cost of getting rid of it would be really prohibitive so i've excluded it from the tenant's lease but i do wonder if they think what's he got in there what is he keeping is that where he buries the bodies the truth is so dull like it's an it's an outmoded welding machine and about 20 pritt sticks can you just tell them what is in there and then they wouldn't be curious or even tell them what is in there and then they wouldn't be curious or even show them no because they've never asked they've never asked so like

i'm just i'm imagining they internalize these feelings have you ever been tempted to make it look a bit pranky with like some rubber body parts peeking from under the door some flashing lights in there some tape screams no but i do occasionally go there to retrieve the pritt sticks for example um or other bits of like paper and stationery that i've kept in there and i tend to go at night and i do that because i'm working during the day but again i wonder whether if they see me on their security camera they'll be like why does he only come here at night i don't know where daniel is but in britain at least the landlord is required to give 24 hours written notice of intent to come to the property yes so you have that in your favor you know they're not going to just be barging in all hours because it's illegal you guys are not property owners

how do you feel about it i mean if you were renting somewhere and and you had this provision would it bother you not really especially not in a basement if that was not you know a major part of the housing if they were like well you can't use half the kitchen cabinets because of me then that would be a bit different for me it'd be more about the intrusion than the than the space but like basement isn't that intrusive but it's just like when you're a tenant you want to feel like it's your home even though yeah kind basement isn't that intrusive. But it's just like when you're a tenant, you want to feel like it's your home, even though it kind of isn't. You just don't want the landlord tipping up and being like, hi, just come to get my bike.

Yeah, if it's stuff they're having to use every day, I think that is unacceptable. But if it's like the property's Christmas lights and they'll come in once a year to get them and once a year to put them away, then fine. I think there are many ways in which as a renter, you feel very insecure and

very powerless and maybe it is uh just amplifying those feelings it's like the physical manifestation of those feelings where the space isn't truly yours and your privacy could be violated at any time so i think just make sure you have a clear agreement with them about how often they plan to access it. That brings us to the end of this episode of Answer Me This, but please supply questions for the next episode of Answer Me This. You can write us an email or you can record your voice as a voice memo and then email that to us. All our contact details are on our website, answermethispodcast.com. And you can follow the links there as well to find us on twitter and facebook and if you head on over to answer me this store.com now you can buy our first 200 episodes for just 79 pence each or even more bargainously our brand new one hour album home

entertainment for pay what you like and if what you like is nothing it's available for nothing if what you like is 100 pounds thank you you for nothing. If what you like is £100, thank you. You can pay that as well. Whatever you think it is worth. A lot of you being so generous and it's extremely touching because you don't have to. You chose to. Indeed.

We really appreciate it. That's very kind. But also we're very happy for you to have it for free. We are. It is pay what you like. And therein within that album, you can find out how much Justin Timberlake got paid for singing, I'm loving it. Certainly wasn't pay what you want from mcdonald's was it and you can find

out what a wonderwall is i was about to say definitively but we've had people get in touch with feedback questioning our answer but i think it's thorough enough i really did a lot of research into the wonderwall thing yeah that i don't think there are many questions in my mind to be honest exactly and also you can check out our other work ollie what have you got in the pipeline in the month of july 2020 yes i do five podcasts you can discover them all at ollie man.com uh one of them is the modern man m-a-double-n which is my magazine show about trends and sex and amazing true stories this month i interview the inventor of friends reunited her name is julie pankhurst she lives

around the corner from me and when i realized that i spent three years stalking her until i got to agree to an interview not at all weird very very reluctant to do it that's so interesting sites that were big and now not it's like the fall of the roman empire or something it's absolutely the story of social networking basically like they Like, they invented Friends Reunited, her and her husband, 20 years ago. That's three years before MySpace and four years before Facebook. Yeah, it's really fascinating. I'm so pleased that I did actually manage to get to speak to her. And now she's like, stay away from my property. I've given you what you want. Leave me alone. Yeah. And you can hear that at modernmanwith2ends.co.uk. Helen? Yes, I have two podcasts,

The Illusionist and Veronica Mars Investigations. We're halfway through season two of Veronica Mars. It is a bumpy ride. I'm very exhausted by the amount of plot. And in The Illusionist for Pride Month, I have done a couple of episodes about queer vocabulary in oppressed languages. Okay, I will check that out because I've previously enjoyed your episodes about Polari, example yeah and you did one about pride and the meaning

of the word pride i think yeah that was back in the first year yeah i did why they chose pride for the first pride as opposed to other words yeah it was really interesting and there's one about the word queer itself and about the history of the word bisexual which has had a very tricky lifetime that's all at theillusionist.org. And Martin, you are no stranger to talking on microphone yourself. Yeah, I have a podcast called Song by Song, which is about the music of Tom Waits.

And we've got some lovely guests coming up. Charlie Harding from the podcast Switched on Pop. Ah, it's one of your faves, isn't it, Ollie? Switched on Pop. The podcast, yeah, love it. Love a bit of like really quite serious analysis of Ed Sheeran lyrics. You can find that at

songbosongpodcast.com And then we will be back with a retro episode halfway through the month and with a fresh new episode of Answer Me This on the first Thursday of August. So join us for that. Bye!