Anything Better? - A Whole Back Of A Restaraunt

Episode Date: August 5, 2023

Is there Anything Better than Virzi hypothetically throwing a perfect game?  MERCH: https://silkshopstores.com/anythingbettermerch/shop/home

what's up everybody and welcome back to the anything better podcast with your host me paul bursey bill burr over there and of course our producer and Themlis out there in Beverly Hills. And you guys are listening to episode number 83. We are in the numbers that I've been waiting for for the whole damn podcast. Because these are the best numbers in football. Who do we got, Bill? 83. All right. 83.

Not as many wide receivers. Think about that. That's not like a big. There's a lot of 80s, 81 88s 86s 83 ted hendrix defensive tackle for the oakland raiders andre reed yes great andre reed for the buffalo bills len ford doug Wes Welka, Vince Pappel, Mark Clayton, Vincent Jackson, Anthony Middler, Vern Den Hurden. Oh, my God. I had that football card.

Sherman White, Willie Galtz. Your Chicago Bears, Ben Davidson. All we need is one pen, Rodney. Remember him? Like beer commercials. Pat Tilly. Louis Lips for the Steelers. Ah, one of the greatest of all time that nobody ever brings up. John Jefferson on the San Diego Chargers, who always said, if I didn't sign with the Green Bay Packers, Jerry Rice would be breaking all my records. Steve jordan not the drummer there's a lot here heath miller ricky

sanders george sours stefan page lee evans clarence williams jerome barkham jesus andrew flipper anderson flipper that was a great one that was a great name jj stokes alie crumpler dave of course i don't know who half these fucking people are. Terry Glenn. Terry Glenn. What is the significance of Terry Glenn? Terry Glenn had, I want to say that Terry Glenn and Bill Parcells had a thing, and he was with the Patriots, no? Terry Glenn was the guy that Bill Parcells did not want to draft.

Yes. Kraft overrode him, and then he's like, hey, you want me to make the dinner? You got to let me buy the groceries, which was funny because he was overweight. And then that made them go south, and everywhere he went, Bill Parcells, after that, he always signed Terry Glenn.

So I guess he kind of liked him. Rest his soul, by the way. Santana Moss. Dave Parks, Albert Cba Colin Dante Stallworth there you go oh you're gonna love 84 next week Paul oh you know I'm gonna love 84 but that's a great list that's a great list um even some of those guys that you blew over fast like Lee Evans because I know it's a huge list Lee Evans was good a lot of those guys man 83 I didn fast, like Lee Evans, because I know it's a huge list. Lee Evans was good. A lot of those guys, man. 83.

And I totally forgot Wes Welker was 83. I totally forgot that. But it's sort of a hybrid number. There was a couple of defensive players in there. Ben Wilson. Jesus Christ. That guy was like a man's man. Deepest voice ever.

I believe he was one of the – might have been an original in the AFL. Yeah, dude. My first number in like legit school organized, like not like the Pee Wee League or what they called it back then was the Midget Football League, and that's literally what it's still across the country. Hockey was that, midgets. My first number ever was 27.

My second number, I played quarterback. The only number I could get. I didn't want it, but I was number 16. And we went five and one in a six-game season. Tied for first. And then I was number 82 when I got to junior high school. I was a slot receiver. How come you didn't want 16?

I wanted 11 because my birthday was 11 11 and also phil sims so i was like i wanted that and then they were like 16 and then i was like all right joe montana he's italian it makes sense my one and only uh year of football yeah my dad saw it for what it is he's like christ you're out there knocking your brains out and he knew i was slow as shit he knew it was like this kid's not gonna get a scholarship he's just gonna get even dumber i was number 25 oh that's a good one that's a good one it's a real it was a really good number that's my daughter's number in basketball 25 um so uh how's it going, dude? How's it? How's I saw that you looked a little tan when you came on this thing.

And I was like, oh, Billy got his feet up in the sand or what? Oh, Billy's been flying high in the skies. Oh, I could tell, dude. You look good. You look like you got a tan. You got a little blood in your body. You look like a vampire. Yeah, no, I've been flying up to uh santa barbara and uh san ynez san ynez is like a little sleepy

town where they got like uh wine country it's a great place to bring your wife and stuff and then uh you know they got michael jackson'sland Ranch. Fly over that thing. A little creepy. Yeah. I'm starting with the man on the choo-choo train. Yeah, you see the kids scattered out. It sucks, dude. There's strikes going on out here.

I'm hearing stuff that maybe, it'll get resolved soon, but, uh, you know, the business is changing or whatever. So this is one of those bumps in the road, but I think everybody's going to be all right. I just hope, uh,

they do it sooner rather than later. Cause most people in this business, Paul, they're not as lucky as us to have, uh, another form of income with standup comedy that, you know, this show business thing is, is their business. So I'm really hoping it's going to turn around.

Yeah. Yeah. I think so. Eventually it's going to have to, because the longer it waits, I feel like the worse it is for, you know, listen, we can do whatever we want, right. As stand-ups we can get our own cameras we could film our own shit we can do that we're lucky it's so great that we could just go tell jokes and make money when these people are like literally marching around new york city dude i saw that protest and i'll be like look i'll be honest man i said this before dude i've never and this is nothing against protesters but i've never given a fuck enough about anything to march around in a circle and hold that shit and and walk and go like this dude i would do

two laps and be like nah dude i'll tweet about it i it's just i'm not built like that you know what i mean so when i see these guys all hot and sweaty and shit i was just like yeah man i hope Yeah, man, I hope it works out for everybody. You know, I can't do it. What the fuck was that? Paul, do you realize, Paul, do you realize how many people died so we could have a middle class in this country? So they could, like, they used to have, like, union busters, and they'd just send these guys down, the owners, and the owners owned the politicians politicians and they had the cops.

And these guys would come down with two by fours, bats, sometimes guns. And they'd kill people's dads because they had like fucking kids working in factories and shit. Like we're giving all of this away. Paul, the fact that you don't want to walk around and scuff up your Air Jordans and get sweaty because you just took a shower and put some fucking cologne on. That's got to be one of the weakest things I've ever heard.

That is not a hot take, Paul. Look, you know what? If stand-up comedians strike, if there was a strike for us, I'd be down there with everybody. Paul, you already showed your hand. I know what card you're holding. No. Dude, I'm all for the writing.

You're like, listen, if you want me to tweet about it. I've just, dude, it's 98 degrees, dude. It's 102 degrees. I mean, what am I going to do? Fuck it. You know what I mean? I'm for them. I support them.

I've just never personally went to a protest. Have you? Have you been to a protest? It sounded like you supported them. You're like, i just look out there i see him all sweaty i'm just like hey i mean good luck to you but that's not for me dude i heard that does not sound like support to me paul no you sound like you sound like the guy who doesn't want to pay him no no no no dude i'm all i tweet i want to they deserve the money that they should be getting. And I'm absolutely all for the writer's strike.

I'm just saying. You sound like Bill Clinton when he was lying right now. You're getting all firm. I believe that they deserve the money. I did not have sex. That was one of the funniest clips ever. Now to know he's just straight up lying when he has that look on his face. Well, no. It was like Rafael Palmeiro.

Rafael Palmeiro showed his hand in Congress with the steroids. He went, I did not do steroids ever. And he fucking poked his finger and everybody is like, oh, dude, he did it. He did it. Can you imagine when he went out and got like a fucking, you know,

a little fucking bacon, egg, and cheese after that? And it's just in his head like, Jesus, the fuck did I just do in there? And his wife's sitting there going like, Raphael, what the fuck? I mean, I used to fucking. Inject you. I know what part of your butt cheek you're liking it. And he's like, I don't know, man. I just got in there.

I saw the crowd I wanted to put on a show. I get excited. Do you? Have you? I actually went down, Paul. I did walk the picket line. Okay. That's what I was going to ask.

All things comedy, we're sending a food truck over there today. There you go. That's fucking class. Add it, Kyle. Add it, Kyle. I support him. Yeah's fucking class. Add it, add it, I support him. Yeah, that's fucking money.

Do you need to make, can you just let these fucking people do on efforts for family? I was in the writer's room. The first three seasons that I had my kids and I couldn't be in there every day. Dude, that is one of the hardest jobs I've ever fucking had just mentally just sitting there thing all you do is just look forward to lunch like what are we having for lunch today dude and then you work your ass off and you send the script

in and then they're like yeah nah it's not working and you gotta pull the fucking thing apart again how hard those goddamn writers work. And then like, as far as like actors, what blows my mind about acting is even if you win a fucking Oscar, within five years of that, you'd be like, Hey,

I'd like to play that role. They're like, well, I don't, I don't know. He's never played that before. She's never done it. Like they,

it's not like you and I, when we, I was just talking to somebody about this this where we go to a comedy club first time we're there and you're a cool guy and you fucking kill you don't have to prove to the comedy club owner the next year that you're funny again yeah i don't know he added six shows you only did five the last time. You know, he kind of just plays five. Can he do six? It's not like that. Yeah.

Yeah, so they have a really tough job. But any young comedians out there watching this, don't ever put your stand-up aside just for these moments. Like, I always kind of knew from my brother, who was really good at business, it was like you never put all your eggs in one basket because then they got you by the balls there, Paul. So I'm lucky enough that I can keep working during this.

But, Paul, unlike you, who looks down on these strikers. No, no. But, no, I – Paul, I go by, I feel guilty that I can go out and make some money this weekend. And they're fucking sitting there. You know, they got like kids and shit. Look at that Humminbird. You know what?

I'm making a great point here about America. That was like a Disney movie. And as I'm talking, a little Humminbird came by the window. Yeah, that was that kid with Winnie the Pooh. Was he holding a little Astra sign in his beak? No, he was a Versi one. He had a fucking chain on just going like, yeah, I'm already fluttering really fast.

That ain't for me. That ain't for me. No, I remember one time you told me something a long time ago, long time ago. You were like, the two things, you know, I don't know if we were working together but you said the two things that they can't take from a stand-up is their is their stand-up and their podcast and those are two things that if you do and you work on and that was really really a

pointy and smart thing to say but also what i was talking about with robbie slowick who's a writer and he writes for john stewart and he was on the Verzi effect and he's part of this and this is really affecting him and his family big. And he's a great, great fucking writer. It's like when you go to all those barbecues and people like, dude, are you watching that show? Are you watching that show? It's all the writers. I remember one time I talked to Brad Garrett in Vegas for the people that don't know Brad Garrett. I mean, I'm sure you know, but if not, he played Robert Ray Ray Romano's brother, and everyone loves Raymond. I was talking to him, and I was just like, hey, you do it.

Yeah, and he goes, I said, that show was unbelievable. I said, it still holds up with all those family issues. And he just goes, Paul, it was the writers, man. It was the writers, and he was, I mean, he's being humble because he's an incredible actor, and they were able to take what was on the page and make it incredible. Brad Garrett's performance in those fucking Jimmy John commercials are better than half the fucking characters I've seen in movies. Dude, both of them.

Do you get an unbelievable actor? Because they can also take what you wrote and take it in a completely different direction. Let's not just sit here and harp on this. They're working hard. Just fucking pay them. It's in America, Paul. What are we doing? It's fucking greed. It's disgusting, greedy assholes. Pay them, give people what they deserve. So then you could get good shows again, man. I was getting excited coming home at night and throwing on a series that I fell into. Um, and, and, and now

I got to, by the way, though, speaking of series, oh, Bill, I got to be honest, and I got to make a public apology here. This is going to be a big one for the anything better crowd, and especially the crowd that follows us during our BetMGM football picks. Your boy sat up three nights in a row, and I watched the Netflix documentary executive produced by Peyton Manning called quarterback. And it was, they followed around last year. They followed around Patrick Mahomes, Kirk cousins, and Marcus Mariota, who got the new job in Atlanta after Matt Ryan.

And each episode they are like, these guys gave access, dude, these three quarterbacks, I guess, you know, Peyton Manning's got a lot of clout. He probably will, you know, they are like, these guys gave access, dude. These three quarterbacks, I guess, you know, Peyton Manning's got a lot of clout. He probably will, you know, he's like, dude, we got you. But, dude, I mean, access in Mahomes' house, Kirk Cousins' house, Mariota having a baby, and these quarterbacks were fucking awesome. But, dude, if you ever thought any mic'd up shit you saw in the NFL, this was that to the, I mean, dude, Mahomes. And I got to tell you, I'm making an apology.

I am now a fan of Patrick Mahomes and his wife who talks shit, who goes, let's fucking go, dude. It was so cool to watch. She threw him a 27-year-old birthday party. I think he was 27 or 29, one of those things. She throws him a birthday party at his house, and the cameras are there. And he just goes like this. She's like, oh, we got to take pictures.

And dude, he just turned in to a legit dude. Like it was no, he just goes, he goes, he goes over to her and this is how he goes. Listen, listen. He goes, no more pictures. I'm not doing this anymore. He goes, I'm going to do it one more time. I'm going to go with pictures. He goes, tell your friends.

He just do it, Bill. It was literally, it was literally a bill. It was literally, it was literally like us. It was literally like us with our wives. He goes, dude, I'm going to do it one more time. No more pictures. And then he goes, he goes, eventually, dude, I got to get a different haircut. He goes, I'm a father now. He goes, what am I doing, dude? I was just like, all right. All right. Patrick. Now listen, his wife is a little nuts. She slaps on the glass, but then some of the things she says about football, because she's been around it since high school, I'm like, you know what?

She's just a fucking all-in ride-or-die wife. She might be a little annoying. I'm like, I love it, dude. And then he built his dream home in Kansas City because he goes, I'm staying here, 12-year contract. This is my home. And he's building this multimillion-dollar fuck compound basketball. And he put a golf hole in his backyard and he designed the golf hole

so like in his backyard you just see this one dog leg left and you're just like oh dude i love this guy so there you go man and it took him all the way to the super bowl and the kid played hurt man he was dude when you see the people screaming with the ankle and he's just go give me it just fucking hurry up dude because like he had that mentality of like even the backup could take my job even though it's not gonna happen because he's patrick mahomes and he's one in his mind you can see he's like hurry up i gotta get back in dude i gotta get back and then he just goes fuck it he goes take it too long and he just got up and ran and andy reed goes andy reed goes they see andy reed walk up to him and he goes hey dude we're gonna take you out we're gonna take you out and send you back for extras he goes fuck no

no no andy no fuck that no and he's just going it was awesome it was dude you got to watch it it was great i don't know if i need to do that was fucking beyond entertaining right there just you doing the recap was awesome it was it was good and then you know kirk cousins is more the family quiet you know with his wife and they are in minnesota and then marcus mariota you see him fucking lose his job during it so i guess he didn't plan that to happen during the taping but um yeah so it was pretty it was pretty cool man it was definitely dude peyton manning and now they're looking but here's here's a cool inside thing I found out they're looking for the next season and the next

three quarterbacks and some people are telling Peyton no they're like nah dude I want to concentrate on the game and shit so but they're going to come out again because you know there's going to be three quarterbacks I want to do it so well yeah I know it's also somebody like somebody they're going to ask somebody probably also trying to ask somebody on the bubble so you can get all three experiences. Yes, that's exactly right. Oh, hey, I know some I know some comedians that won't say no. OK, leave the names. I was watching the Schwarzenegger documentary.

My wife loved it. My wife watched all things. She fucking loved it. I was watching. Izenegger documentary. My wife loved it. My wife watched the whole thing. She fucking loved it. I was in an outpatient. I've been hitting the gym every day with his voice in my head. You get this picture in your mind of what you want your body to look like, and you just will it. You will it to happen.

And I'm just going like, I can't get on a fucking elliptical? It's like a halftime speech that just plays in your head dude uh yannis papas was talking about your bit after he watched that he goes dude dishonest schwarzenegger documentary he goes bill's bit is so fucking brilliantly perfect he's like dude i missed something i missed something in it what because i the the bit i had was saying like you know these people making fun of them and stuff like that it's like do you think that you could move to austria learn the language win their bodybuilding title like seven years in a row uh transition into acting become the biggest movie star of a century um then marry into their

royal family and and become governor of whatever fucking section how many lifetimes would you need just to do that and i missed something in between bodybuilding and becoming a movie star he'd made some money with pumping iron or whatever and And they were, he was like, what should I do with my money? And somebody told him to get into real estate. And he did. And they show him walking out of this apartment building. He goes, I was a millionaire before I even tried to do acting. So then I didn't have to deal with these little bullshit parts.

My agent, you want to, maybe you'll be a character actor. He goes, character actor, fucking bullshit. I want to be the star. I want want to be the lead talking like that and everyone's going like with your accent there's no way it's gonna happen he's just like fuck you bullshit and he did it dude yeah like the language barrier too the guy just spoke like that and came here and took over

it's fucking dude could you imagine if i showed up in Japan and I'm like, dude, I'm going to be the Al Pacino of Japan. I'm fucking coming, dude. Dude, I would if I showed up in Japan and I'm like, I'm going to be a fucking I'm going to be the biggest movie star in Japan. You know, hey, minus the bodybuilding.

I don't even know if I can make it in real estate over there. No, it really is. It's like, dude, and just the stuff about his childhood and his brother, the whole story with his brother is just frigging heartbreaking, man. It's really, I don't know. I get a lot out of it, and then I also look at the guy like, he should have taken a few days off.

You know what I mean? Because it is that thing of like, one of his heroes was the first guy that climbed Mount Everest. And they asked him, what was your thought when you were on top of Mount Everest? He goes, I saw another peak,

another mountain peak, and I immediately started plotting my line up that. And it's just like, I'm not doing that. That's like these fucking these celebrities who are just like every morning I get up at like two in the morning. I do 40 sets of curls before I have a bowl of cornflakes. And it's just it's like that's what you have to do to be at that level, man. You can fucking have it. You know what I do at two in the morning i sleep for another four hours fuck out of here

did i lose you i can't hear anybody oh jesus oh i can't hear you either Jesus. Paul, I can't hear you either. Paul E. How about now? Yeah, now we can hear you. I said I took an edible at 2 o'clock in the morning last night.

It would have been better. The timing would have been better if the thing didn't mute. But I did. Last night I took a little bit of – I've been having a hard time sleeping. And so I was like – Maybe if you walked a picket line with your fellow brothers in arms there paul maybe you'd be a little tired dude i couldn't ask you a question i was what pair of sneakers paul verzi is going on a 98 degree day this goes against all of your sensibilities and you go down to the picket line all right i want to know the paul verzi outfit

yeah i would do the i would wear the air max 97 whites with the fabric not all leather i got them actually those have been the summer those are the summer like beat up ones you know dude i'll go down there i love how you immediately knew you you immediately you've never walked the picket line and you immediately knew the shoe you didn't even go like oh wow let's never never walk the picket line i wear the air max 987 dude i'm not going to mention names but i will tell you i heard some shit that was just like wow at the at the stand. I guess I could say this. We could cut it out if I can't, but I'm at the, I'm at a comedy club and there were some comedians in there and I heard some comedians. I heard some people, let me just say, maybe not comedians. I heard

some people in there going, oh, I can't wait for that fucking industry to just break these writers. All those fucking writers. They don't give a fuck about us. They're the ones that want to cancel us. They're the ones talking about how fucking standups are the bottom of the barrel. They were like, fuck them. And I was just like, whoa, okay. They were like, when did writers ever say that? They all want to pair up with us and create a show. I know.

I know. I don't know what I was just like when I heard. That sounds like a couple of people that had a deal and it didn't work. Yeah, well. It's the first time you go in, I'm getting a deal. Oh didn't work. Yeah, well. The first time you go in, I'm getting a deal. Oh my God, I'm getting a show. And then it doesn't go. It's like, you know, it's your first little major heartbreak in the

business. Yeah. Or it could be somebody that had an issue with a writer and the writer was like, fuck you. And then all of a sudden they're like, I can't wait for them to get broken. It's like, man, I don't know. None of this happens without everybody. You know what that means?

That means you don't like the Godfather. You don't like all the great movies you like. You don't like they were fucking written. They weren't improvised. Speaking of the Godfather, the greatest. Can I tell you something, Paul? I fucking hate people that blame victims. I should talk with my ex, but like I fucking drives me up the fucking wall.

Yeah, I do too. Maybe these actors are making too much fucking money. You know what it is? They just, it's just that they know the names. You know, the names of the actors. You don't know the names of the guys that are running the fucking studios and all of that. Somebody tried to tell me the other day going like, you know, the guy that runs like Disney. It's like, I mean, he's basically like running a small country.

I'm like, all right, take it easy. It's like running a small country. And no point can there be a fucking military coup and somebody's going to come in there and fucking whack you and your whole family. And they find your skulls in Siberia a hundred years later? Yeah, yeah. You run in a studio. Do we put the cartoon before the fucking whatever, you know? Listen, I respect everybody's job in this business or whatever, but, like, I don't want to just keep harping on this shit,

but, like, you know, for a comedian to be shitting on writers, it's just like, dude, if you think that's not eventually going to come around to you, if you think this AI shit isn't going to come around to you if you think all of this technological shit isn't going to come around to you if you think that these guys getting taken out isn't going to fuck you over just because you know how to write shit jokes that doesn't mean you know how to write a script or a great script those are all skill sets it's you know what it is paul it's just more of the complete lack of respect specifically that writers get even on like the oscars like half the shit that they win they don't even televise them and you got all these people it's like if it wasn't for them they'd have nothing to say yeah dude i and and and i'll take it further, dude. I saw it firsthand because before the strike, I was in the middle of a project writing it and I was writing it with another comedian and I was writing it with a really professional writer who does it for a living and he did it for hit shows.

And we were like, hey, what do you think about this? They were like, hey, why don't you write this thing? Kind of like, I'm sure you wrote a lot of, I'm sure you personally wrote a lot of scenes in F is for Family, but then you take it to writers and they fucking say, how about this? Dude, I wrote this thing and we wrote it and we were like, hey, we're going to go into the gym and we're going to do this and they're going to be a mom.

And then he just goes, yeah. And then we're going to do this, this and this. But what if you did this? And I was just like wow like that just made a fucking scene versus something that is just uh okay like a standalone joke a standalone joke versus like the whole setup and then setting it up to where you could revisit it later in the episode and you're going oh dude that's like that like, that was insane. Thank you, dude. You just made a show. Like it's probably the difference of a show that gets canceled versus a show

that actually has, has legs. Like, you know, because what Larry David's saved Seinfeld, right? Seinfeld was on its way out after the first season or it was doing really bad. And then fucking David, uh, Larry David comes in and the show becomes the, the big, one of the biggest Larry David was there from the beginning. Was it? Yeah, I think it was Brandon. Brandon, what's his face?

Tartikoff or something like the guy that was running NBC. He loved the show. Yeah. So he just says, keep it going. Yeah. Yeah. He's stuck by it. They didn't have to change a formula or anything.

They just it was just to keep going, keep going. Oh, OK. So he just stuck with going, keep going. Oh, okay. So he just stuck with what he believed in. Okay. Larry David was a good writer. Yeah, I mean, Jesus Christ. Well, he got mad. You know, the story is that when NBC asked for, like,

more episodes in, like, a second season, they were, like, they were almost bummed out. They're like, ugh, I don't know if we have five, ten more episodes, 22. You know, they didn't think they had it in them. And then, obviously. Dude, but yeah, but are you sure, like, they didn't make an adjustment on the writing? Okay.

No, no, no. I mean, we might have got a little bit retooled or anything. But that's a big difference than, like, Larry coming in. Like, he was there from the beginning. But what was funny was, you know, it was either larry david or gary shanley rest his soul that was talking about or maybe steve martin one of them was talking about how you work on something and you're trying to sell it you're trying to sell it and then you sell it and then there's the euphoria of selling it and then you're like oh fuck now we have to go do this

yeah because it's like it's so much goddamn work speaking of work paul because we're supposed to talk about sports here last i checked the red sox were a game up on the yankees the yankees are in the cellar paul like four games above 500 that's how strong the al east is and as much as the red sox are in second cellar ball, like four games above 500. That's how strong the AL East is. And as much as the Red Sox are in second to last place, we might be tied with you guys. We're both still in the hunt for the wild card in last place. Yeah, because the division is just, it's so,

everything is within four games. And look, I'm not trying to. We're like eight games out. We're like eight games out. Like, well, Tampa Bay's kind of taking a nosedive. Oh, no, I'm talking about the wild card. The wild card is only like within a few games. The wild card is only within a few games.

Now, I'm not trying to make excuses because the Yankees pitching has not been what the Yankees pitching should do at all. But I'm happy that Aaron Judge is finally coming back after missing like 40-something games tonight. He's coming back in Baltimore. And, dude, you see why he was MVP last year because without him, I don't know, we probably don't make the playoffs without him. We don't make the wild card.

Here's the thing, Paul. This is my theory on him, why he gets injured a lot, is there's never been a guy his size that I can ever remember playing baseball. And I just don't think that they have the right cleats or something for him, footwear, because these guys in the NBA are all, for the most part, his height and taller. And they're running up and down playing full-court basketball. They're not dropping like flies. And I just don't think with his size and all of that muscle, I just don't think the equipment is up. And I'm basing that off of Grand Hill when Grand Hill wore feelers

and they made the shoes wrong and it fucked his feet up, like the wrong shoes and stuff like that. Like I just figured that they, they, they just were like, all right, well this is the cleat we make for a guy five, 10, just make it bigger for a guy,

six foot 10 or whatever the fuck he is. Six, seven, six, eight. Um, so what was he doing? Dude,

Grant Hill fucking incredibly gifted black athlete, went to an Italian company for sneakers. What are you? You go to Nike. You go to like Fila was and they didn't make them the shape of that Fila sneaker. It almost even though it was even though it was a lot of people like them. They were fine. Nobody knew.

Nobody had a designer look to them because italians can't hold back on that dude look at his sneaker it almost had you could go out with them look it had like a sleek it didn't have a fucking sneaker look uh can we andrew can you pull that up the fila grand hill the Fila Grand Hill, it looks so different than any. I know he had a couple of different variations of it, but I think the original was just like, oh, Grant, what are you doing? He had one of the most amazing careers of anybody I've ever seen because after those injuries, he totally had to change the way he played,

and he did, and he still played at a high level where before he messed up his feet with those fucking sneakers, his game was above the rim. When he was at Duke and everything, he used to dunk and all of that stuff, and he completely changed his game and was still just as effective. It's like when Pedro lost some of the velocity and he added pitches, like great ones like that it was an amazing uh it is it it is actually that's a great point grand hill's career with all of the injuries

and all the teams he went to he got like effective and more minutes as he got older after injuries too that guy was a monster man he was a monster and he won a national championship with Bobby Hurley, right? Yes. He played with Leitner too. Yeah. He's the guy going like this, you know, and the thing fucking does that turnaround jumper. Dude, that Wildcats game.

I'm excited, though, for baseball now, Bill, because NFL, we still have like two months. We still have some time, whatever. But now with the Yankees and Red Sox having to scratch and claw even to stay relevant makes August fun because usually you're like, ah, you know, we're, you know, the Yankees. You guys are always – we're always at the top. We've been at the top.

Both teams have been one or two. We haven't. We haven't since 2018 when we won it all. It's just been Chris Sale. We got him and he's just been hurt the whole time. Yeah. The story of me watching the Red Sox the last four years, I feel like every time we score eight runs, they score nine. when we get some pitching we score like two runs so um dude nick

dipalo nick dipalo said something years ago at the stand he goes dude i love baseball and i love how long it is and i love sitting up every night watching it and in my mind i'm like yeah no i don't know man it could be but dude i gotta tell you now that i you know my life slowed down a little bit with my as far as like you know everything within my life when i'm home i'm with my kids i want to be with my kids my kids go to bed oh bill i get in the new chair i get in the new chair we bought for downstairs i grab myself a nice tea because you know i love a nice tea and i just and i just watched the yanks dude and i'm like this is fucking great man i love it i watched the red socks versus the braves we won eight to

one we hit into i told you about this we hit into a triple play on a blue pop fly to center field oh you told me about that that's unbelievable unbelievable. The guy on first, whoever the fuck it was, went 80 to 85% of the way to second base. And it's funny, the last like 15%, he's like, it's going to drop, right? It's going to drop. And he just kept going. The guy catches it. The ball gets to first base so goddamn quick.

The guy, do you have to tag on that or do you can just step on the base? If it's in the infield? No, it was in the outfield. Oh, then you have to tag. Yeah. So he had to wait for that guy to come back. So the guy on second thinks he can make it to third. The guy ran back to first, at least could have slowed down a little bit.

He was still running, hauling ass back to first. The guy on second took off. Tags the guy ran back to first at least could have slowed down a little bit he was still run hauling ass back to first the guy in second took off tags the guy at first for two over to third for for three a triple play your classic paul eight three five if you're scoring at home three five triple play somebody i said i've never seen that before and some twins fans sent me this great one but it was all the way out to the warning track and they might have took off and it got held up or something and this guy ended up catching it and it was one of those deals he just threw it to the infield and the infielder made like outs two and three you know uh how about this how about the yankees pitcher domingo herman pitches a perfect game three weeks ago i was in houston i got off stage i watched it now they might take him out of the rotation

he's fucking pitching batting practice right now the guy had one of the most guy in the yankees threw a perfect game yeah three weeks ago domingo herman it was nuts i get off stage i'm smoking a cigar in houston and all of a sudden across across the board, across the ticker, it just goes, Domingo Herman for the Yankees is perfect through seven. So I'm like, oh, that's cool. And I'm smoking a cigar and talking to the guys that I worked with. Domingo Herman, perfect through eight. And then every TV got it live.

They put it live in the ninth inning. And I'm in Houston after having a great time on stage smoking. Oh, dude, it was incredible. He gets the fucking perfect game. I'm going like this. I got red wine in my hand. I got a fucking cigar on stage smoking. Oh, dude, it was incredible. He gets the fucking perfect game. I'm going like this. I got red wine in my hand. I got a fucking cigar on the other. It was unbelievable.

And now they may take him out of the rotation. Dude, they're talking about taking him out of the rotation. Is that the last one since David Wells? Oh, yeah, it was the 24th one ever. And the whatever, whatever, eighth one. The last Yankee to do it was David Wells. David Cohn did it. david cone did it then david wells did it like the same fucking year 98 right david cone uh you know back-to-back years

i believe not the same year cone and wells wells was the last one this is the fourth yankee to do it it's don larson it's don larson who did it in the world series dude in a Yogi. Then it was David Cohn, I believe, in like 97. 98. 98. 98. And then it was 99. And then what is it, 2000 for Cohn? Oh, Wells?

Wells was 98. Cohn was 99. Oh, okay. Oh, Wells was first. All right, I got one for you. David Wells, I've told this, I think, before. David Wells threw that perfect game. It was an afternoon game.

Remember when he was slamming the glove down, looking like that, like it was going to happen, and then he got the last out? That night, I was living on the Upper East Side. I walked down to the comic strip to do a spot, and when I walked by, I looked in this bar, and I could just feel this energy, and David Wells was standing in the middle of all these

people drinking beers with a big smile on his face. That's awesome. Yeah, and it was like, dude, and it was like, maybe 15% of the fucking people had cell phones back then. Like, I think that was right when I got a cell phone.

Everybody just had like a flip phone. I didn't think there was a camera. So they were just all talking to him. And he was standing in the middle, like, you know, like he worked for the fucking city. It was really cool. That's amazing. I got, we'll end the podcast on this,

because I know we're out of time. But how about this? I got a buddy, one of, we'll end the podcast on this. Cause I know we're out of time, but how about this? I got a buddy, one of my closest friends in high school, shout out to Kevin Martin. He takes a date to the game. He takes a fucking date to the David Wells. Perfect game. He's like, Hey, you want to go to a baseball game?

Everything's good. And the whole time she's going, what does nothing's happening? Why are people cheering? This is nothing. And he's just going, whole time she's going what does nothing's happening why are people cheering this is nothing and he's just going paul he's going dude what all i wanted all i wanted was to have a friend next to me for this moment and this chick is going i don't get it like there's no hits oh dude he was devastating smoking hot yeah i mean dude you know regular chick would have known enough just to fucking be active oh yeah this i mean dude he you know regular chick would have known enough just to fucking be acting oh yeah this i'm happy for you dude the the mental hand job he was going

to get in the car on the way home is the only thing that kept him going through that fucking thing oh i mean that's that's uh i'm trying to think if i've ever been to something like that the only time i saw ever been to something like that. The only time I saw a crowd collectively act like that, when I went to that Expos game and that guy stole home plate, and I'm fucking standing up, oh, my God, he stole home plate, and nobody else cheered. There was barely anybody in there, and I was way out in left field.

They, like, mind-fucked me. I'm like, did I just fucking, you know? And then later on that night, I'm in Montreal watching TSN, the ESPN. Like, here's let me out. See you all the time. So I don't play. I was like, I fucking knew it. Dude, they were just out there.

They were hammered in the outfield. Just singing. Oh, like they were in a soccer game. Dude. How about the games I've been doing with you? You're the only person out of every, out a soccer game. Dude, how about the games I've been to with you? You're the only person out of every game, other than when I went to game one of the World Series in 2000 with my brother Christian, we saw an unbelievable extra innings game.

Dude, we went to, think about what me and you, dude, we saw that one Alabama win at the end, which fucking was wild. We saw a Kentucky. Against Johnny Football. We saw Kentucky. No, no. We saw. I'm talking LSU.

Remember, dude? Oh, fuck that Alabama. That was brutal. Yeah. Fucking alligator around it. How about this? We were at the Kentucky Derby and we saw not only did we see American Pharaoh win the Kentucky Derby,

that horse wins the triple crown for the first time since 1973. We were at that. 77 or 78 was the last triple crown winner. I remember I had the Sports Illustrated. I'm old. Go ahead. No, 73, I think. No, that was Secretariat. Oh, 78. 78 it was. It was my birthday. Yeah.

Birthyear. And then I think we went to the Masters where Tiger happened to come back after all that shit. We got to see him. He didn't win, but we saw Phil Mickelson winning on a Sunday, which was nuts. Dude, we've seen some really cool shit. I'm trying to think.

I remember one other one I go do. We saw Jason Tatum at Duke Carolina. We saw Duke come back and win that game, which was nuts. And we saw the Japanese dragon. What was her name? Dude, the red Panda or whatever, dude.

Oh yeah. I mean, I never seen, uh, she threw up 20 plates on her toe. To end this podcast, you're, you're pitching for the Yankees.

Yeah. You throw a perfect game. Yep. Where are you going? and what sneaker are you wearing that night? This is exactly what I'm doing. I'm being dead serious. This is exactly what I'm doing. I'm being dead serious. You got me excited with the question. Okay. Whoever my assistant is, when I get off, I go like this. Tell Stacey, this is exactly what i would do tell stacy uh get a place in manhattan top-notch vip all of my friends we're having for 100 people tonight tonight not not

tomorrow i'm tell her i'm showering tell her i'm showering and i need a whole back of a fucking restaurant in manhattan open i need cuban cigars okay i want jordan threes with stones with washed jeans that washed light light jeans and a white t-shirt a white bright white thing and and there's got to be uh bottles of champagne and strawberries and there's got to be there's got to be bottles of champagne and strawberries and probably sushi i want sushi catered by what's the, what's the one that we went to on my birthday? The sushi joint. No, no,

no, no. And we go and we just shut it down. You want the other rest, the restaurant that you rent out. You want them to bring no boo into that restaurant. Oh dude. If I pitch a perfect game, it would go on for it would be it would be nuts how quickly you answered that you would think that you actually pitched for the yankees and have come close a couple of times uh you know what's funny i pictured

myself you know what i would go i would go down to the tip of manhattan where the staten island ferry is and i would sit on a park bench by myself smoking a cigar yeah i would do that for two seconds and then i would just fucking i would be i would just leave my phone there going and i just sit there laughing going what the fuck how did that just happen yeah that's amazing that's that's i would be sad that i like yours better yours is way more cinematic dude if i'm the 20 oh dude if i was a 25th person to ever throw a perfect game in majors dude oh my god dude uh that would be amazing dude Dude, after my Netflix special, I told Stacy, I said two bottles of... He's really the

26th. I mean, that one kid got fucked out of the perfect game. Got him out by fucking three feet. Was it a perfect game or a no-hitter, though? Perfect game. I thought it was a perfect game. Oh, okay. That's brutal. It's brutal. At the very least, it was a no-hitter. He had a no-hitter going, and I kicked the shit

out of that call. I kicked the shit out of that call. I kicked the shit out of it. All right. To really end the podcast, what do you do if you're pitching in the World Series Game 7 at home and you give up a home run to lose it? Where are you going? That's when I'd go on the park bench. And I lose it.

Dude, that happens. I sit in the locker room in my uniform until everybody leaves. What did Mitch Williams do when he threw it to Joe Carter? Touch them all, Joe. You'll never hit him. But what did Mitch Williams do that night?

It'd be a great question to ask him. I just picture him. He went to, like, Saddle Ranch and rolled the mechanical bull. All right. It'd be funny if you still went out and celebrated. What the fuck are you so happy for, Mitch? Come on, man. I mean, someone's going to win.

Someone's going to lose. I played in the World Series. Isn't that just a positive? Come on. Don't ruin this night. Don't ruin this night. All right? How many World Series have you pitched in?

All right, guys. Well, that is the show. Anything better? Please keep rate reviewing. We'll come out with a clip. And please spread the word. We love doing the show. And the BetMGM is coming, guys. We'll come out with a clip. And please spread the word. We love doing the show. And the BetMGM is coming, guys.

NFL week one. Our picks are coming. Bill and I will be picking four games a week. So get ready for that. And, yeah, for all of our dates, check out our websites. Right? Anything else, Andrew? Anything else I got to?

All good. All good. That's it. We'll see you guys next week Thank you.