anything goes with emma chamberlain - criticism

Episode Date: July 14, 2022

hello- today we’re talking about criticism. i think criticism is so important in all of its forms. i experience criticism a lot, and have actually learned to appreciate it. it’s possible to benefit rather than suffer from criticism. i share what i see as the distinction between helpful criticism and hurtful criticism, how i think criticism is best given, how i think criticism is best received, and more of my thoughts on the topic. how do you handle criticism? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, last night I had this ambitious goal of waking up at 5 a.m. this morning because I was like, I don't know, I'm in the mood to get up early and really seize the day. Like I'm really in the mood for that. And so I set my alarm for 5 a.m. And clearly it didn't work because I ended up waking up at 8 a.m.

I don't even know how it happened. I don't remember my alarm going off at 5 in the morning. Like I don't remember anything. All I remember is I woke up at 8am. And that's actually later than when I normally wake up. I normally wake up at 6 or 7am, but today I woke up at 8. So my morning is just not going my way,

but I'm not gonna let that stop me I'm not going to let that stop me. I am not going to let that stop me. Anywho, today we're talking about criticism, because I think that criticism is something that is so important in all of its forms, its positive and negative forms. And I just want to discuss criticism today, because I experience criticism a lot. Possibly more than most people,

because anytime you're on the internet, you experience a lot of criticism from a lot of different types of people. And I actually appreciate criticism. I've learned to appreciate it. When I was younger and I first started posting things on the internet and I started getting an influx of criticism, good and bad, I hated it. I hated it so much.

But over time, I've learned to appreciate it and find the silver lining in it. And I've also learned not to take it too personally. I've learned to benefit from criticism rather than suffer from criticism. And so I wanted to share today what I think helpful criticism is, what I think hurtful criticism is, how I think criticism is best given,

how I think criticism is best received, and probably some more stuff, who knows, who knows with me. Before we start, let's read the definition of criticism. Just in case anybody is a little bit fuzzy on what the exact definition is. Criticism is the expression of disapproval of someone or something based on perceived faults or mistakes, or the analysis and judgment of the merits and faults of a literary or artistic work.

So it's basically expressing disapproval. Although I feel like disapproval is the wrong word in a way. I mean, I know I'm reading the dictionary right now. I'm like reading the dictionary definition and I'm like, I don't really feel like that's right. But I feel like disapproval isn't the word I would personally use. I feel like I wouldval isn't the word I would personally use.

I feel like I would phrase it as criticism is suggesting that something is changed, whether it's about yourself, about something that you've worked on, something creative that you've done, the way you've decorated something, like criticism is just saying to somebody, hey, I would have done this differently. That's kind of the way I think of criticism. Anywho, now that we've gotten that out of the way, what is good criticism? I think that it's any comment that has someone's best interest in mind. When you go to somebody and you say, hey, I would have done this a little bit differently.

And you're saying it because you genuinely want them to succeed. You want them to improve. You want them to learn something. And there's no ego involved. There's no evil intent involved. Just pure helpfulness. I think good criticism is helpful. And that's kind of one of the backbones of good criticism

is that it's helpful and it's constructive in the sense that it'll help that person who's receiving the criticism learn something and overall do better. I think good criticism also is rooted in somebody's personal experience. So the person who's giving the criticism, I'm gonna say criticism so many times and we're all gonna be annoyed. We're all gonna be annoyed but I don't know. How to avoid saying it 50 times in this episode.

I'm going to really try to keep it to a minimum though, because I know I have an issue with reiterating too much anyway. It's going to be a tough one for us, you guys. It's going to be tough, but it's going to be worth it because I think it's a good conversation. Anyway, I think it can be good when it's rooted in somebody's personal experience and knowledge. So somebody is coming to somebody else and saying, based on my personal experience, this could be done a little bit differently and you could have better results. I think that if you are to be giving criticism, you should have a good amount of personal experience and knowledge on whatever you're giving criticism about,

because otherwise, you're not really in the place to be giving criticism. Do you know what I'm saying? I think when it comes to giving a disapproving opinion, whether it's positive or negative, you should be certain about what you're talking about, because it's no light matter to give someone criticism. People take that shit seriously.

When I receive criticism, I take it seriously, because I really want to learn from it. I want to benefit from it. I want to become better because of it. And if I'm listening to somebody who doesn't know what the fuck they're talking about, that's harmful. And so every time you feel, oh, I kind of want to give some constructive criticism on this thing that somebody else is doing. I want to give somebody else constructive criticism. Think to yourself, do I know enough about this to be even speaking on it? Because if not, then you might want to keep it to yourself.

Another trait of good criticism is well thought out. That kind of ties into what I just said, but you don't just want to be throwing around criticism. For example, let's say one of your friends painted a painting and they show it to you and they say, what do you think of this? And at first glance, you're like, that's just not good, I don't like it. And you don't like it. And you don't like it.

But you look at it for a little longer and you think, well, maybe it's just not my style. Technically, it's a well done painting, but it's just not my style. So then instead of criticizing the painting and saying what you don't like about it, just because your gut reaction, your immediate reaction, was that you don't like about it. Just because your gut reaction, your immediate reaction, was that you don't like it. Instead of expressing that, you take a second and you think a little longer. And you realize that it's just not your style, but it's actually a really well done painting. So then you're able to respond and say, I think it's really well done. Instead of saying, well, I don't really like the colors you use because all the colors

that you use were way too bright. And I tend to like more muted paintings. That's not useful criticism because that's just based on your own personal bias. Upon thinking about it longer, you realized that's not useful criticism and I'm not going to give it. Instead, I'm going to be positive because it actually is a very well done painting and a lot of other people would really love it. Do you see what I'm saying?

Criticism should be thought out before it's put out into the universe, before you say it out loud and let it be tangible, you know, because it's serious. The person who made that art piece in this theoretical situation might stop using bright colors altogether because of what you said. When in reality, what you said wasn't really useful because it's based on your own personal bias. That's not useful, right? You keeping that criticism to yourself

benefits you and the other person. Because it benefits you, because you thought about what you said before you said it. And you made sure that it was useful, criticism that could make that person better. Telling somebody, I don't really like your art. It's just, I didn't, I don't really, it's not, it's just not working for me.

That doesn't help anybody. That doesn't help the artist and that doesn't help you. You see what I'm saying? This is just an example. This could apply to so many different things, but you have to think about it before you say it. This takes us back to third grade. When your teacher would tell you,

don't say something unless it's nice, kind, and helpful. Nice and kind are the same thing. So I don't know why they would say that. But regardless, we learned at a young age that unless something is kind and helpful, we just shouldn't say it. And it sounds ridiculous, but I think that as we grow up, we start to forget these fundamental values

that we learned as children and it's ridiculous. I mean, even I have a hard time with this sometimes, not necessarily when it comes to criticism, but in other areas of my life, I find myself forgetting and then remembering fundamental values that I learned as a child. The last two qualities of good criticism are number one. The criticism being non-forceful and neutral in nature, and it being given in a forgiving tone. I think

an issue that is common with criticism is its delivery. When giving someone criticism, it must be remembered that whoever we are speaking to is another human being who has feelings, who puts love and care into what they do, who's doing their best in life, who makes mistakes, and does a shitty job sometimes just like the rest of us. So that must be remembered. You know, I don't know,

especially on the internet sometimes, I see people receiving criticism in such a harsh and mean tone. And I just don't think that that's helpful because people don't respond well to things that are forceful and things that are mean in nature. They respond to things that are forgiving and things that are neutral and things that are helpful.

For example, when I was younger and I lived with my parents, my mom would sometimes tell me to do the dishes, actually a lot of times, my mom would tell me to do the dishes all the time. And she's very particular about the way that things are done. She's very meticulous in a good way, but she's just very picky about the way that things are done because she takes pride in everything that she does, whether it's washing the dishes or being on time

to everything, you know, like appointments and stuff like that. She takes pride in all of that. And so when she would ask me to do the dishes and I wouldn't do them in the way that she wanted, for example, if she cooked with oil and I didn't use hot enough water, so there's still a little bit of oil residue left on the bowls and cups, whatever. She would let me know. You know, she'd be like, Emma, you cannot do it like that.

And sometimes she would get frustrated with me in a way that a mom does. You know, sometimes moms get frustrated, whatever. And she would give me criticism about how I was doing the dishes in a way that was not very forgiving or it didn't feel that way in the moment. And so guess what I would do? I would respond terribly. And I'd be like, well, I didn't know. And I just did my best in whatever. And the next time I went and did the dishes, I didn't listen to her criticism.

I was like, fuck you. I'm going to do the dishes the way I want to do the dishes because you raised your voice at me. You were mean to me, you, whatever. I mean, I obviously was taking it too personally as a young child, but you get what I'm saying. I wouldn't respond well and I wouldn't take the criticism because I didn't like the way that she gave it to me, normal mother-daughter stuff. But I think that that's a good example of how the delivery of criticism is so important, approaching it in a way that's not forceful and it's neutral and it's forgiving, allows the other person

to feel safe, to be vulnerable, and say, you know what, you're right, I did kind of make a mistake, or I did kind of do this improperly. Or I could do this better next time. Thank you for giving me this criticism. I'm gonna take it and I'm gonna use it and I appreciate it. Because something that also needs to be remembered is receiving criticism is vulnerable. When someone comes to you and says,

you should have done this differently. That puts the person who's giving the criticism on a slight pedestal and it takes the person receiving the criticism and takes them down a peg. Do you see what I'm saying? Psychologically, that's the impact that it has. So it should be a priority to try to even out the playing field. So that everybody feels comfortable. Nobody's getting an ego boost. a priority to try to even out the playing field.

So that everybody feels comfortable. Nobody's getting an ego boost. Nobody's getting an ego death. It's just pure criticism. There's no ulterior motive. There's no aggressive tone. There's nothing like that. There's just an equal playing field. Okay, now let's discuss what bad criticism is.

I think it's bad when it's meant to hurt someone's feelings. Like, I see this on the internet all the time. People just saying shit to get under people's skin. It's not helpful. It's not rooted in knowledge or wisdom. It's not rooted in trying to help somebody be better. It's not rooted in good morality. It's rooted in anger and hatred in trying to hurt somebody else.

And that's where I think the line with criticism gets so blurry. Because somebody could give criticism with the intent of hurting somebody's feelings. But then when somebody else gets their feelings hurt, they say, well, you're just too sensitive because you can't take criticism. That's on you, babe. You're just a sensitive little idiot.

That's where the line gets blurry. And that's why I think people use criticism as a verbal weapon in a way, because the line between it being constructive and it being hurtful is so blurred at times. I think bad criticism also can be present when the giver of criticism personally gains from giving that negative criticism. For example, let's say your friend wants to throw a birthday party and they were like, okay, I'm going to have it at 9 p.m. and I'm going to invite 20 people. But in your head, you're like, well, I think 9 p.m.s too early. And I also think

that she should invite more people because I want to attend a big party because I've been really in the mood to go to a big rager recently. So then you go to your friend and in criticize her idea of her party plan. And you say, eh, I think that the party should be at 10 pm, and I think you should invite 50 people, because a party that starts at 9 pm is just bound to be lame. And a party with only 20 people is also just bound to be lame. So now, you're giving criticism on how your friend wants to throw their party,

because you want to personally gain from this party. You want to hang out with a fuck ton of people and party and go crazy and you want it to go late into the night. So you're giving criticism that has a personal agenda. That's also not good. That's not coming from pure intentions. Another example would be,

you're kind of jealous of your friend because your friend is a really talented musician. And your friend writes a song and sends it over to you and says, what do you think? And you actually think it's really good. You're like, wow, this song is really good. I really like it. But you want your friend to feel discouraged because they're a great musician and that makes you feel a little bit insecure. So you respond, eh, it's just all right. Your personal agenda is showing there, because your personal agenda is that you want your friend

to feel like shit about their music so that maybe they might even stop doing it. And then you no longer have to feel insecure about their talents. That might even be something that happens subconsciously. You might give criticism that's negative about somebody's creative endeavor that you're jealous of subconsciously, and not even realize that you're doing it, because you kind of don't want to give them that satisfaction. I've never, well, I mean, I might have done that at some point in my

life who knows when I was younger. Listen, when you're young, who knows? I was thinking about that the other day, like, young kids like in middle school and even high school, it's so crazy how much gets learned during those years because I feel like the years of middle school and high school are just the years of making constant mistakes and being corrected and receiving a lot of criticism.

Like when I was growing up, I received criticism constantly, teachers, friends, my parents, everybody. I feel like I was constantly receiving criticism. And I'm so grateful for every little piece of criticism I received during that time because it shaped me as a person. I think that's a really great example of helpful criticism.

I received so much good criticism as a child. For example, if my parents would see me handling a situation in a way that wasn't fair or wasn't right or wasn't nice, they would tell me, or if I would say something to them that was wrong in some way, mean whatever it may be, they would tell me, I think your middle school and high school years are so valuable because you receive so much criticism and all of it shapes you into the person that you end up becoming. And I think that's a really beautiful thing. But anyway, that was super off topic.

Going back to what bad criticism is. So far, I've said it hurts someone's feelings. It's meant to hurt somebody's feelings and not be helpful. Number two, it's for the giver of the criticism's personal gain. Okay, so that's what we touched on so far. It's for the giver of the criticism's personal gain. Okay, so that's what we touched on so far. Next, it's given about something inconsequential, like someone's outfit.

It's given about something that just doesn't need to be criticized. Like, if your friend comes to you and they're wearing an outfit and you think it's really not good, unless like their nipple is hanging out and they're not aware of it, there's no reason to criticize the outfit, right?

Because if somebody feels good about their outfit, they feel confident about their outfit, they feel confident about whatever sort of creative, artistic, self expressing endeavor that they're on. Let them do it. I honestly believe that criticism is not necessary or helpful in those areas. And some of you might disagree with me and say,

well, I want somebody to tell me my outfits ugly. I want somebody to tell me that my painting sucks. I want somebody to tell me that this song that I wrote sucks. Whatever it may be, some people are like, no, I want to know. But I disagree because I think 90% of the time, it's just not helpful. And you just got to let people express themselves in the way that they want to. I think the only exception is, is when somebody is a rookie in a topic

and somebody isn't, is a pro at a topic. I'll give you an example. So I recently have been getting into watercolor painting and I love it. It's so fun. Like watercolors are so fun. And my dad is a professional artist. He's an artist.

He paints paintings for a living, right? So sometimes I'll text my dad a photo of something that I'm painting and I'm like, I feel like this looks off. Like, what about this is off? And I ask him for criticism and I say, please tell me what's off because I want to learn. So I'm asking for it, right? And then he'll say, well, it's because you didn't use enough shading on the chin of that face. Like you were painting a face and you didn't shade the chin properly. It's missing some shadows.

Then I'm like, oh, my God, I totally see that now. Thank you. So you see what I'm saying? That's different. Or if like you're just now getting into fashion and your friend is super into fashion, they are super savvy when it comes to styling outfits and stuff like that. If you go to your friend who's super into fashion and they get it and they know what's up, and you don't know anything, you're just getting into it. And you say, what am I missing?

Like this outfit feels like it's missing something. And then they're like, well, actually, I think there's too much going on. I think you should take off a few of your necklaces. You're wearing too many necklaces. And I don't think that those earrings really match. I think you should switch them out. And then also I think you should wear a different shirt because that shirt's kind of weird whatever

You're asking for criticism and then at that point Everybody wins by it being given you see them saying Next going back to tone if criticism is given in a judgemental tone, it's just not going to be received properly. I already kind of touched on that earlier, but it just won't be received properly. So what's the point of even giving it? If you're going to give criticism in a judgmental way, the person receiving it is going to be like, well, fuck you. I'm putting my walls up you, I'm putting my walls up and not letting myself receive this because I'm in protective mode. When somebody approaches you in a judgmental or aggressive tone, you close off your receivers

of information to protect yourself mentally. So that's one thing, but the other thing is, in the last thing that I think characterizes bad criticism, is the criticism boosts the ego of the giver. So the person saying, oh, I would change this or that, is getting an ego boost by kind of knocking you down a peg and telling you that what you did or what you made or how you did something wasn't right. It's not rooted in anything positive, it's rooted in boosting the ego. I think a good example of that is the music example that I gave earlier where you are jealous of your friend who makes really good music. They're just a natural added, they're so good,

and they make a new song, they send it over to you, and you're like, fuck, it's really good. And instead of just being like, I don't have any criticism, I think it's really, really amazing. You say, I don't know, it's, I can't figure it out, but there's something off about it. You say that just to boost your own ego.

That's negative, okay? Moving on, now that we've established what good and bad criticism is, we can talk about how to receive it because I think that learning to receive it is an art within itself. I mean, on the internet has helped me a lot because I have been forced to read extreme amounts of criticism about myself on a constant basis because I'm just out there on the internet and anybody can comment on me,

what I'm doing, what I'm wearing, how I look, how I did something, how I didn't do something. And so I've become pretty good at it, I would say. I have some practice, right? My first tip is to not let it crush your ego. I almost think of it like this. When someone gives you criticism, before you let the criticism take over your mind like a fucking virus, you know,

because sometimes it can have that effect where it just takes over your brain and then it's all you can think about for weeks. Before you let it get to that point, think of your brain as having two sections when it comes to receiving criticism. Half of your brain in the front of your brain, think of it as a holding tank for information.

And then think of the back section of your brain as the permanent information station, okay? This is how I think of it. So when somebody gives me criticism, before I take it to heart, before I digest it completely, I let it sit in that holding tank in the front of my brain for a little bit. And I kind of chew on it. And I ask myself a few questions. Before I make it permanent, I ask myself number one, do I think that this person is giving

me this criticism to help me? Number two, do I think that this person knows what they're talking about enough to be commenting on anything that I'm doing at all? Number three, does this have malicious intent? Number four, do I think that they're right? Even if it's hard to admit, sometimes somebody will give you criticism that's hard to swallow. You're like, ah, I don't want to admit this about myself. For example, I think this is most uncomfortable when it comes to your character.

I've had people a few times in my life say to me, you know, I don't think you handled that very well. Or that wasn't really very nice the way that you did that. Like that wasn't very nice the way that you handled that situation. I've had that happen to me a handful of times in my life, not very many, but every single time that it's happened, it has really rocked my world a little bit.

Because, and it's rocked my world, because at first I was like, no, fuck you, I handled that fine, right? And then I was like, wait a minute. I let it sit in that holding room in my brain for a little longer. And I was like, no, they're right. I didn't handle that well.

And at first, you know, I'd let it crush my ego. But then with a little bit more thought and a little bit more reflection, I would come to the conclusion that they were right. And that there's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with making a mistake. And there's no reason to bring my ego into it and get angry that somebody is trying to help me. And then I would accept it as fact and as truth. And I'd store it in the back section of my brain. And use that throughout my life after that point. Before you let criticism affect you in any way, you got to let it sit in that holding tank in your brain where it's almost a little bit removed from you. You haven't fully digested it yet because you need to decide whether or not it's something

you want to keep. Do you know what I'm saying? You have to decide, is this something I want to keep? Or is this something I just want to let go? And you have to take some time to think about it before you can decide that. The hardest thing about receiving criticism is keeping your ego out of it, regardless of what kind of criticism you're receiving. But it can be an ego crusher when somebody says,

mm, not sure about how you did that, right? It can crush your ego because it puts you in a vulnerable spot when somebody corrects you in some way. But you have to look at it as, this is either somebody trying to help me be better or this is somebody's own insecurities projecting onto me. It's one of those two. And if it's somebody trying to help you, then there's no reason to have an ego about it,

because guess what? This is going to make you a better person in whatever way. This is going to make you a better person. This is going to make you a better artist. This is going to make you a more talented, hardworking blah blah. This is going to help you be better in some way. And then if it's rooted in somebody's own personal agenda or it's rooted in somebody else's ego or it's rooted in malicious intent, then you can just let it go.

You don't even need to bring your ego into it at all because you can look at it and say, hmm, something, something here is fishy. So I'm just going to let it go. I'm not even going to listen to this shit. I'm just going to let it go. I think to sum up, the best way to receive criticism is number one, you have to take it with a grain of salt in the beginning. You can't take it as fact in the beginning. You have to analyze it first before you let it in and you let it affect you emotionally. You need to give yourself some distance on it mentally before you pull it in close. Does that make sense? It's very metaphorical, but it makes sense in my head and it's the way I look at it.

When I first receive it, I try to receive it with some distance. I try not to absorb it immediately. It's almost like another way to word this is, when you first receive criticism, think of it as being outside of your body, outside of your mind, outside of your body. Think of it as almost an object that is disconnected from you. It is not connected to you.

And while it's outside of your body, you can analyze it. You can look at it and say, okay, actually this is useful or this actually isn't useful. And then you can either decide to swallow it and bring it inside of you and absorb it. Or you can say, I'm just gonna leave this one out and I'm not gonna bring this one in. That's the way I look at it, okay. Now let's discuss how to give criticism. Step one, fully think about it before you give it.

I've already explained why enough. So I'm not even gonna go into it. Number two, ask yourself, why are you giving this criticism? Is it because you have wisdom on the topic? And you wanna help somebody be better? Is it because you kinda wanna jab somebody a little bit emotionally? Ask yourself those questions.

Number three, weigh the pros and cons of speaking your mind. Even if what you're saying is rooted in trying to be helpful and trying to make somebody better. Ask yourself, is it going to upset them so much to a point where it's not even going to be helpful anymore? For example, somebody shows you an outfit and they're like, I love this outfit. And in your head, you're like, I hate that outfit. And you're like, hmm, should I give criticism about this?

Because they're going to go out tonight and they're going to look kind of funky a little. You know, I don't know if people are going to judge them for their outfit or whatever. Should I like protect them and tell them that, oh, this outfit's not so good. Or should I just let them wear it? Because they feel confident.

Way the pros and cons. In this specific example, the pros are that you might protect them from being judged in public. But the cons are that you're going to make your friend feel really bad about an outfit that they actually kind of like. Got away the pros and cons. Also ask yourself, do I know this person well enough to be giving them criticism? You know, is it appropriate? And last but not least, before you give someone criticism, put yourself in their shoes. If you were them, would you rather remain aloof about this certain topic and just learn for yourself?

Or would you rather receive criticism? For example, let's say your friend just started dating a guy and you're like, eww. This guy is bad news. He just doesn't, he feels like bad news to me. So you want to go to your friend and criticize her decision to start dating this guy. Put yourself in her shoes. If you're in her shoes and you just fell in love, would you rather just go through the experience on your own and make mistakes on your own and find his true colors on your own or would you rather have somebody come to you and say, eh, I don't know if he's the right guy and kind of make that decision for you

and point out the red flags for you. Ask yourself that. For me personally, I prefer to just fuck up and learn for myself in most scenarios. I'd rather just have to learn for myself when it comes to things like that, that you won't know for sure until you experience it. Yeah, put yourself in their shoes.

I think when it comes to what is appropriate to express disapproval of, I think stuff that's neutral is better off just left alone and uncriticized. Like somebody's aesthetic choices, like there are choices in art, music, makeup, clothing, somebody's personal beliefs, you know, that don't impact anybody but themselves, just their own personal moral compass. I think unless you are very, very close to them and they have something fundamentally wrong

with their beliefs, you probably should just leave it alone. Like if somebody believes in God and you don't, it's kind of none of your business to go and like say, and criticize that belief because it is none of your business. And it doesn't impact you if somebody believes in God and you don't. All of that stuff is neutral because it doesn't impact you, right? Like their behavior or choice or whatever it may be doesn't impact you. It's neutral. That I feel like does not need criticism. Although some people disagree and they're like, no, I can criticize whatever I want. But I tend to avoid criticizing those specific topics.

Things that I think are appropriate to receive a little bit of criticism would be things in a work or school environment because the whole point of being in those environments is to do the best work that you possibly can and also learn as much as you can. It's not personal because usually the things that you create in work or school are not personally tied to you as a person. It's based on strictly your quality of work. I think when somebody is asking you for criticism, it's appropriate to give criticism,

because they're asking you for it. Obviously, if somebody's asking you for it, that doesn't mean it's an excuse to give it in a mean way, but I think in that case, it's appropriate. I also think it's appropriate about an objective piece of work. For example, you and your friend go see a movie or you and your friend go to an art museum and look at art or you and your friend, whatever, okay?

And you go and you look at something else that neither of you guys have created. Art, movie, food, at a restaurant, whatever it may be. I think that's a okay area to give criticism because neither you or your friend created that thing. Even if one of you guys like it and one of you guys don't, I think that that's still a safe space to be giving criticism

because neither of you guys created it, neither of you guys have it, neither of you guys have a personal tie to it. And last but not least, I think when a situation is timely, like for example, somebody's choosing between two jobs or they need to respond to a text really quickly or they need to handle an argument and they need advice fast. I think that in moments like that, sometimes it can be helpful to chime in and say, you know, I wouldn't do it like this.

I would do it like this because when things are timely, I think desperate times call for desperate measures. And sometimes somebody needs a second opinion and they need it fast. And so I think there can be situations where it's appropriate to give it then. But anyway, that is my approach to criticism in my life. And I feel like when it's approached in this way, it can be so helpful and it can be so important, no matter what form that it comes in.

It can teach you about the people around you in your life. It can teach you about yourself. It's a you about yourself. It's a really powerful thing. And I've really learned to appreciate it. And it's not easy to learn how to give it properly and to receive it properly. And it's difficult. It's a process.

Learning how to make it a positive thing all around, you know, it's not easy. And it takes practice and it takes a sense of mindfulness as well. But getting to that point is so, it's so awesome because I've learned so much from criticism that's been even uncomfortable at times. But I've learned so much and become so much of a better person from being able to receive it properly. I don't think I'd be half of the person that I am today if I hadn't learned how to receive criticism.

Since I've learned how I've become such a better person, and I think that also comes with age because when you're younger, you are still learning about yourself, what your moral compass is, who you are, what's nice and what's not, who you are creatively. There's so much you're learning, right? But since I've learned how to handle all this shit, I've just become a better person from it. So anyway, that's all I have for today. Thank you guys for listening and hanging out.

It's always such a pleasure. I have to pee so bad because I've been drinking my coffee throughout this episode and it's just like, I'm gonna piss myself. I've been holding my pee for like a half hour. And let me just make it worse by drinking more coffee. But anyway, speaking of coffee, check out my coffee company, Chamberlaincoffee.com. And if you want to pick some up, I have a little coupon code, AG15, for a little discount if you want to pick up coffee.

But anyway, thank you guys for listening and hanging out. We do it every week. We'll do it again next week. We've been doing it for a lot of weeks. So you can listen to past weeks if you want. Follow anything goes on Twitter at AG podcast or on Instagram at anything goes. Rate anything goes on any of the streaming platforms

that you stream podcasts. DM me, tell me your thoughts, comment on my on Instagram. I don't know. Do whatever. Do whatever you want, okay? Let me know what you think of this topic. I always love having my episodes be an open conversation where I can share what I've been thinking recently.

And then you guys can come and you guys can share what you've been thinking recently. And even if you want, you can criticize what I said. I get criticism on stuff that I talk about all the time. And I appreciate it, as long as the criticism is constructive, obviously. I receive constructive criticism on things that I say on this podcast.

And I'm open to that because that's the whole point. What I love about this podcast is that I come on here and I just talk about what I've been thinking and what I've been learning as a young person. And I share it with you guys and you guys can say, eh, I don't really fuck with that. Like, I don't agree with that. Or you can say, I love that, I agree with that.

That is what makes this so fun and magical, is that it's an open conversation where we're all just trying to learn and become the best people we can together. And it's a beautiful thing. And so I appreciate your positive and constructive criticism that you give about this podcast. And I appreciate you guys for listening and I'll talk to you next week.

And until then, just keep being you, babe. Love ya. you