Are You A Charlotte? - Is Mr. Big an F Boy?

Episode Date: February 17, 2025

Was Skipper actually an early version of Steve?Timothy Olyphant is a hot hot hot twenty something  in this episode but is Carrie “justified” to be over it after seeing that apartment?And, are roommates a dealbreaker?Find out why Charlotte is so ahead of her time.Plus, inside secrets on Sex and the City show locations and walking 48 blocks in Manolos.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Yo, what up? It's your girl Jess Hilarious, and I think it's time to acknowledge that I'm not just a comedian. It's time to add uncertified therapists to my credentials because each and every Wednesday I'm fixing your mess on Carefully Reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network. Got problems in your relationship? Come to me. Your best friend acting shady? Come to me. Thought you was the father, but you not? Come to me. I can't promise I won't judge you, but I can guarantee that I will help you. Listen to Carefully Reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more

actors, musicians, policymakers, and so many other fascinating people, like writer and actor Dan Aykroyd. I love writing more than anything. You're left alone. You know, you do three hours in the morning, you write three hours in the afternoon, go pick up a kid from school and write at night. And after nine hours, you come out with seven pages and then you're moving on. Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

We all have a moment that splits us wide open. On my new podcast, Wide Open with Ashlyn Harris, I'll sit down with trailblazers from sports, music, fashion, entertainment, and politics to explore their toughest moments and the incredible comebacks that followed. Listen to Wide Open with Ashlyn Harris, an iHeart Women's Sports production on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports.

Calling all Yellowstone fans. Let's go to work. Join Bobby Bones on the official Yellowstone fans. Let's go to work. Let's go. Join Bobby Bones on the official Yellowstone podcast for exclusive cast interviews, behind-the-scenes insights, and a deep dive into the themes that have made Yellowstone a cultural phenomenon. Our family legacy is this ranch.

And I protect it with my life. Listen to the official Yellowstone podcast now on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Kristin Davis and I want to know, are you a Charlotte? Hi, hi everybody. Welcome back to Are You a Charlotte? Today we are going to talk about episode 104.

It's in season one, and it's called Valley of the 20-something Guys. And I love this episode so much, and I have a fantastic guest with me today. His name is Blakely Thornton. He's a super fan, and I love to follow him on Instagram. He's very funny and TikTok, and he is, how he's known is your internet's mean best friend, which I find

hysterical because I don't really perceive you as mean. I don't either. Like honestly, that was that was a headline that Hunger magazine gave me when I was like, oh, this is my first inference of like, speaking as yourself. Like, oh, that's what that's what you got from that. That's super interesting. Okay, because I personally would not describe you as that way, though what I do love so much about you, many things, first of all, super smart,

extremely insightful, very funny, but also you just say it like how you see it. And there's not a lot of kind of layers or nonsense, you're not trying to please anybody, and that's very refreshing and wonderful. So thank you. I think my brand is, I call it see something, say something.

I'm like, what, oh, all right. I love it, I love it. That's what we need at this time, I think, in internet land, because to me, you're not mean, you're just honest. Yeah, I'm like, I think there's no, I always say there's no value

in not calling the thing the thing, because I'm like, what are we getting out of it? That's how we got here. We were all like, oh, it's okay. Let's use euphemisms. Like, well, now. Right, right, right. But also, I feel like that created this land where people could be mean.

And because they were saying things kind of like honestly, people were like, amazing. When in fact, no, not really. They're really mean. But also, I think just the joy of people speaking freely People respond to that mm-hmm. You know Like I try to like infuse some joy into it like a laugh you do and crying like yes You do you do my 13 year old loves you. Oh, thank you. I know she doesn't have Instagram So I have to show her.

So I pick and choose based on the subject matter, you know? And she was like, out of everyone I've had, she was like, ah! It was so cute. It was so, so cute. So anyway, she wishes she was here. She wanted to skip school. But when I told her you're on Zoom, she was like, oh, OK.

But she will be listening. Yeah, so hi Gemma. You're listening. Hello. Hello Gemma. A pleasure to meet you through the internet. There you go. One day, one day in person, one day in person. All right. This is so exciting because I am really, really curious what you're going to be saying, and I really don't know. So let me just say that to everybody. It's not like we have had no contact other than me following him basically. And we do know, I think you know Molly, right?

You know our costume designer or Danny. You know someone. Yes, yes, I've actually visited the whole archive in Queens, like for me as a young little elder millennial gay boy, I was like, I remember these moments. Because I'm much more familiar with the series than I should be. Like I remember the first episode I'm much more familiar with the series than I should be like the first episode

I saw was I think like season one the lat like when you guys are the Hamptons and like Carrie finds out bigs eating someone else She's on the cowboy hat on the oh, yeah I was like in seventh grade But for some reason like me and all my straight football friends like it was so I didn't know sex in the city was even like A gay thing but like wow watch it together every I watched the series finale we all were like shut up turned off basketball and watch the Carrie in Paris part two episode and all these men are married with children I don't know how I feel like young boys like don't have that learned misogyny yet but like sex in the city sex in the city in the, and I went to like an all boys prep school was like,

Wow! That was the show. No way. Okay, this year, like breaking new ground in terms of my perception of who was watching the show. Cause I had no idea that was happening either. Well, I don't think it should have been. Like if our parents had a handle on a new one,

like we were 12, like what is that? What's funky tasting spunk? And it's like a bunch of teenage boys. Valid question, really valid question. But I don't think that's a bad thing. No. Right? That might have been educational.

I think it was very, I think honestly, all the guys that watched it were better with their girlfriends, because they kind of had a more advanced view to what the female experience was. Oh my God, okay. They're like, oh, they kind of had the inside track. That's amazing.

That's amazing and wonderful. I mean, whenever men, like there was a time when it was predominantly women would talk to us, like, oh, we love you. Then sometimes men would be like, oh, you know, my girlfriend, you know, makes me watch it. And we were like, that's okay, cool. However, you know, and we were always know, makes me watch it. And we were like, that's OK, cool. However, you know, and we were always like secretly like, that's great.

You know, like, thank God the girlfriend's making and watch it because that's going to help. You know, that's going to help the meeting of, you know, the the sexes over the divide, the great divide. So I'm excited to hear, but you were in seventh grade. So that that is really interesting. OK, yes, I should I should not have been one. Again, it was my, I think the series finale aired like the fall of my,

like the fall of my senior year in high school. I think it was like November 2003. So like I remember that. I remember like Baryshnikov, Carrie, the Star Attack phone. I remember that too. What did you think of Baryshnikov? And then we're gonna go backwards in time, but just curious because I've been hearing some interesting takes on Baryshnikov. It's always interesting to see how you felt originally when you see it and then going

and rewatching it. I think through both and Just Like That and then rewatching the original show on Netflix, everybody is kind of like contextualized differently. Yeah. Baryshnikov, I feel like I've dated men like him that are like thoroughly, I've dated a Parisian man who had, you know, a lot of things and was significantly older, because I'm 39. So I guess what about Kerry's age at the end of the show? Right.

I don't know, I'd be like, he's interesting. He was never the end game. I don't love how, I feel like he was almost like... I'm looking for the word, not a gas lighter, but almost like very much like a love bomber and then like abandoned. Well, like to me, he's just super aloof. Like he makes Mr. Big seem like he's not aloof,

which is interesting, right? By comparison, Mr. Big's like, he's amazing, but then you go back and look at early Mr. Big. I'm like, this man is a... He was a boy before there was a word for it. I mean, is he okay? So can you please, please define boy for me? Okay.

Cause I'm confused. I think a boy is just like a man who has a little bit of Peter Pan syndrome, has money, but also kind of like he is consistent in his inconsistency. And I find that is very big for Carrie in the first few seasons. He's like, let's go like even this episode, let's go to drinks, a drink thing, let's go to this, let's do that. Right.

Right. It's annoying. For me, like, just a man that gives you red flags, but right after the red flag is like an immediate excuse to keep you confused. Okay, then I totally, totally get it. See, I was confused by the boy part I thought that the boy part meant like like an unemployed, you know, like boy like a pool boy I don't know what I thought in my brain a man who's in it to like keep you emotionally tethered Oh, okay. Well, I know all about shooting like this

I can go back to the episode but like even like the phones in episode in this episode Yeah, I feel like I grew up on this is the New York I was promised and then didn't get. I know. I'm really sorry. I feel that way for so many people. But when they're actually in the bar and there are multiple people on a landline on an old fashioned phone, what is happening? I wanted to be I want to go back to that. Like I feel like I want to go to there.

Like I got the end of it like I remember Indy Sleaze like 2010 it was right before everybody had a phone on there a camera on their phone yeah it's still kind of like a little bit very different times club called dark room where like the bouncer was a drug dealer and you'd see like the whole cast of Gossip Girl and like you can't do like I had like a fight with Sebastian Stanover or a slice of pizza. You can't have it anymore. No, it's so sad. Because there's surveillance.

Yeah, you can't do nothing. I know, it's terrible. But when you see the bars, because I've been sober a long time, right? So I wasn't really going out except when we would film at these places. And I'm not quite sure, especially in this particular episode, Valley of the 27 Guys,

I don't know where they are. Do those look like real bars to you? I feel like New York bars, there's a consistency, but there's always kind of like a hook. Whether it's like, I feel like Samantha through the PR lens, like remember when you guys like, there's Bed, there's... Yes. Boushy, there's you know, which is all those things. And I feel like for me, like, that bar could come back now

because I feel like there's a certain movement, especially from like Gen Z and people my age that are just tired of it. Like, I would go to a bar where, like, you had to check your phone at the door. And like, if you needed something, there were literal, like, rotary phones. Which would be amazing.

I would go. We should open that. It would be the hottest club and like try back up for like a year, you know? It would be fantastic. I year. It would be fantastic. I agree. It would be fantastic. I mean, my feeling now, and I don't know if this is shaped by where we film for and just

like that, because when we came back to do and just like that, it was post-COVID, just barely post-COVID, right? So anywhere wanted us. It was shocking to us because it used to be that we'd have to kind of beg and plead and go through all these hoops and pay huge amounts of money to get places because they were like, we don't know who you guys are in the beginning, right? But now the restaurants and the bars were like, please, please come, you know? So we're filming at Daniel.

Like, we never could have gotten into Daniel, you know? It's crazy. So we're filming at extremely posh, extremely beautiful places, not where we used to film, you know? Well now also with the full circle-ness of like, again, like of Sex and the City, of the movies, of and just like that, I feel like people who run these places have to be firmly aware of the cachet they get by you going there. So it must be a complete 360 experience or 180 for you guys, it being like from like 1998 to like 2024, being like, oh, please come film at our hotel, use the penthouse, do whatever you want,

like set it on fire. Yeah, it's really nice, it's really nice. It's a nice difference, but sometimes I wonder, like, are we just elevated now to a point of almost like unobtainable, whereas when you see the bars, especially that one, you know, the one where she, she goes to see big to have the thing, the drink thing. 48 blocks and I have a problem with that. Okay.

Really? As someone who's worn low, nobody's walking. I let's say totally does. Sorry, Jessica. High heels. Yes. And there is a theme. Okay.

Cause you remember after big dies, she walks like 80 blocks. She would totally do this. Sarah Jessica can totally do this. It's insane. Forty eight blocks in Manolo's? I can't walk 48 blocks in driving loafers. I know. I mean, I will say this.

Our feet have suffered. Our feet, all of us collectively are, you know, pretty much a mess. Like we could go to any podiatrist at any time and they'd be like, oh my God, you know. But at the time, like Sarah can run on the cobblestones. I mean, she is like, like an athlete, okay, in the heels. That line threw me. I was like 48 blocks. I would have gotten in the cab, run out, not paid,

and had the 20 year old man back. I'd be like, oh my cab's outside. With the cash too, cause she not paid, and had the 20-year-old man pay. I'd be like, oh, my cab's outside. With the cash too? Because she's like, I left my cash. It's such a different world. She's like, I left my cab. What do you mean you left your cab? Yeah, she got the cash out.

She put it down. No, there was no Uber. There was no, you didn't even pay cabs with credit card. I still, when I get in a cab, I'm like, do I have cash? And then like, no, wait a minute. It's 2025. Oh my God. Weird, weird.

Some establishments don't take it. I'm like, you don't take American money, is this legal? I know, I know, it's very discombobulating. It's getting rid of cash now. I'm like, when I have cash, I'm like, I need to find a place that takes it because many a thing doesn't. I know it, It's troubling.

I started to live a double life when I was a teenager, responsible and driven and wild and out of control. My head is pounding. I'm confused. I don't know why I'm in jail. It's hard to understand what hope is when you're trapped in a cycle of addiction. Addiction took me to the darkest places. I had an AK-47 pointed at my head. But one night, a new door opened and I made it into the rooms of recovery.

The path would have roadblocks and detours, stalls and relapses. But when I was feeling the most lost, I found hope with community. And I made my way back. This season, join me on my journey through addiction and recovery. A story told in 12 steps. Listen to Krems as part of the Michael Lura Podcast Network, available on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, you guys, I'm Catherine Legge. I'm a racing driver who's literally driven everything with four wheels across the planet. And I've got a new podcast. It's called Throttle Therapy. This season, I'm gearing up to make history, competing in some of the world's most notorious racing events, starting at the Indy 500.

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founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. I'm Mark Seale. And I'm Nathan King. This is Leave the Gun, Take the Canole. The five families did not want us to shoot that picture. Leave the Gun, Take the Canole is based on my co-host, Mark's bestselling book of the same title. And on this show, we call upon his years of research

to help unpack the story behind the godfather's birth from start to finish. This is really the first interview I've done in bed. Ha ha ha ha! We sift through innumerable counts. That's 35 pages, isn't it, really? Many of them conflicting. That's nonsense.

There were 60 pages. And try to get to the truth of what really happened. And they said, we're finished. This is over. They know it's not going to work. You gotta get rid of those guys. This is a disaster. Leave the Gun, Take the Cannoli features new and archival interviews with Francis Ford

Kobla, Robert Evans, James Kahn, Talia Shire, and many others. Yes, that was a real horse's head. Listen and subscribe to Leave the Gun, Take the Cannoli starting February 19th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yo, what up? It's your girl Jess Hilarious, and I think it's time to acknowledge that I'm not just a comedian. It's time to add uncertified therapists to my credentials because each and every Wednesday

I'm fixing your mess on carefully reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network. Got problems in your relationship? Come to me. Your best friend acting shady? Come to me. Thinking about cursing that one stank auntie out at the next family gathering? Do it. But come to me before you do because I cussed all mine out before. You want to fight your co-workers? Come to me. Baby daddy mad because you got a boyfriend? Come to me. Thought you was the father but you not? Come to me. I can't promise I won't judge you, but I can guarantee that I will help you.

As a daughter, a sister, a mother, and an entrepreneur, I've learned a lot in life. So I'm using my own perspective and experiences to help you fix your mess. Send me your situation and let's fix it as a family. Listen to Carefully Reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. ["Time Machine"] So wait, let's go back to the episode because it's kind of fun

because it is like a time machine, right? This particular one, the first season in general, and especially this particular one. So tell me, when did you personally come to New York City? I personally came to New York City in the fall of 2009. So. Okay, so way later. Way later.

When this episode originally aired, I was 12 years old. So like. Wow, wow, wow, wow. 1998, I looked it up. Because for me, Timothy Oliphant is justified. And I'm like. Right. And isn't he amazing?

He's the youngin' in this. I looked it up. Could you die though? Isn't he, it's like incredible. Yeah, he would've been 27, 28 when this episode was filmed. I'm like, wait, Timothy Oliphant was in his 20s, 30s, like he's aged very well, so good job to you, Timothy. I mean, right, with that hair now?

Ooh, my God. But listen, I really was like, at the time I was like, that guy, oh? With that hair now? Ooh, my God. But listen, I really was like, at the time I was like, that guy, oh God, that guy. Yeah, wait, how was that? Yeah, he was already married. Oh, he was? Yes, yes, yes. Except for him.

Adorably. I think he already had a bunch of kids even. And I was like, wow, you're so fascinating. And obviously so incredibly talented. And you remember when, like, I mean, if I were her, I would totally pick him, and I would just work on the apartment. I would just be like, let me do the apartment. That was interesting to me, because again,

I feel like I'm around, it's interesting again, watching now at the age that you guys kind of were when the series premiered. So for me, like, I've had that recent experience where I've, like, gone on a date with, like, a 25, 26-year-old and, like, woken up in his apartment the next day, and he had, like, I'm talking, like, mattress on the floor. I was like, wait, 26 year old and like woke him up in his apartment the next day and he had like, I'm talking like, mattress on the floor.

I was like, wait, wait, wait, I thought you just had a low slung bed. And like in the light of day you're like, whoa. I'm like, is this bed in the living? Do you have a roommate, sir? I was like, oh no, no, no. But what happened? Were you like, no, I'm out of here? Oh, I was like, we woke up and I was like, let me order breakfast because I was hungry

and now we have like Uber Eats. So I was like we woke up and I was like, let me order breakfast because I was hungry And now we have like uber eats. So I was like, okay, let me do he was so thankful that I ordered him breakfast I was like, that's odd, which was very sweet. But I'm like, this is like eleven dollars, you know twenty bucks. Okay I was like, do you have any like sparkling water like which was like oh that made a mistake Then I like look around I'm like this bedrooms kind of. And I realized there was just a mattress in the living room. Wow. And I was like, oh, it's a big studio. Okay.

And then I'm like, but then there's another, I'm like, oh, you have a roommate? Oh. So like, I got this stuff, like ate my breakfast. I was like, this has been sweet, sweetie. Like you're doing great, sweetie, Christiana. And like kind of like slowly backed up never to see that man. Oh, I feel bad. It was like, but he was super, I was just like, you're doing great, sweetie, Christiana, and kind of slowly backed up never to see that man.

Oh, I feel bad. It was like, but he was super, I was just like, we're in different places in life, and I just like, great person, texted a couple times after, I was like, I'm, I can't, at 39, I, for the most part, cannot do roommates. Roommates are definitely a problem for sure. But, I mean, when I think back to this time in life, for sure there were people who had

roommates and that could be problematic for sure. But it's also like, you know, I do think in the episode there, like first of all, I don't know if you've listened to my podcast or whatever, I have not seen these episodes, thank you so much. I've not seen these episodes since way back, right? And I, in my mind, really thought that the first season was just like, wah, like all over the place, you know, and not really formed.

But now I'm looking back on it and I have a whole new appreciation. Like, it's not perfect by any means, but it's all there, you know, it's all there. And it's interesting. Oh, your characteristics are surprisingly like blunt in the beginning, even when I saw, when I think when you had that date come to the bar

and they were like, he was the perfect guy for Charlotte. Like he had money, manners, and like a job or something. And I was like, this is the original, like have you heard that new, like, it's like a meme, like looking for a man in finance, six foot, trust me. I'm like, Charlotte's that original girl. Like Charlotte would have been the girl saying that.

That's so true. That's so true. You were 30 years ahead of time. I'm like, Charlotte was the original, like looking for me. So true. And I was so criticized at the time. I don't mean me, I mean Charlotte. Like everyone was like, she's so boring.

She's so boring. And I was like, yeah, just wait. Which, you know, I'm just happy it worked out, right? But like at the time, everyone thought that the other three were so much more interesting and obviously very powerful And I was much more kind of traditional but now I think people are Rediscovering these things and talking more openly about these things. I think maybe I feel like it's because the zeitgeist I feel you can you can almost tell where the cultural zeitgeist is by which one of your characters they favor.

And it almost like swings like this in a circle, because like everyone hated Miranda, and then she said, oh boy, and then everyone's like, wait, wait, having a job in some sense and like dressing in YSL, actually amazing, then everybody hates Charlotte, then it's like, actually wait, like liking love and wanting something, but actually Charlotte's like almost like very secretly like Bohemian and aware. When you, as it moves forward. Or like everybody hates Carrie. And then it's like, oh, but it's like, whatever she's like making choices. Everybody hates Samantha. Just depending on where the zeitgeist is in relation to women.

Yeah. It like swings back and forth to all of you. Cause I've always stood very strong and like I am a Miranda. I like my job. Are you what? I find my, but everybody says different, but I find myself to be a Miranda.

Wait, what does everyone say? Samantha. Everyone obviously leans me towards probably a Samantha in terms of like imagery and probably because I curse and I'm very sex positive. But for me I'm just like, actually like I like having a job. I like stability. Like men are very much like secondary to me

doing what I want to do. Got it, got it. Practical. Yeah, you don't complete me, but if you're additive that's good. And I feel like from Skipper to Steve, you know, the SOS of all of it. Yes, yes.

There's actually a through line. There are a lot of guys in between there. Like Skipper is the original Steve, like Skipper fell so Steve could walk. That's a good point, that's a through line. Though there are a lot of guys in between there. Like Skipper is the original Steve. Like Skipper failed so Steve could walk. That's a good point. That's a good point. Though Skipper, when I look back at this, is hysterical in a way that I just didn't even really

perceive at all in the beginning. You know, he's like a flailing, you know. I burst out laughing, because in season one you guys still had the talk to camera with the people So the basketball scene in this just threw me back to the 90s so hard cuz it was just like oh They filmed this like a Nike commercial. It's like bros I was cuz I think they are I have never seen white men in their 20s in a park actually in the cage

They're in the cage. They're in like the cage. On Sixth Avenue. Like that's like a real, but I'm just there like, oh women, and like Skipper's there. I know, trying to make a basket, oh my God. I'm like Skipper can't walk and chew gum. Like I know this for facts about that character. And also I didn't realize, but I saw it again when I watched

that the guys in the bar, in the 27th bar when she goes back are the same guys on the basketball. Which is amazing. Like we were thinking in such interesting ways at the time. But they do say some crazy things. Like they say, like that kid who's 17 says smart. See? It was, or like, they remind me of my mom.

What? I know, I know, oh my God. That's disgusting. Like why would you go to therapy? And this is when we're like, I feel as a show that we're just trying to be like aggressively non-judgmental, do you know what I mean? Like we're just like whatever these dudes say,

we're not gonna judge them, whereas when I look at them, I'm like they're awful, right? Awful. That's the 90s, like oh men are doing whatever. I'm like these are horrible human beings. Right? And that was the dating pool. But that was also like it's enigmatic. It's like it's representative of the culture at the time.

Yeah, it really is. Just the amount of times that interestingly enough, even like I remember the Chris Rock show in 2000, and you guys had like just been on the cover of something together. And there was like literally some like white male pundit like actively calling you guys whores. It was so strange. Oh, this is what it was like.

I was like, wait, I like, I remember being like 15, like 1999, 2000. Was it Bill O'Reilly? Yes. Because Bill O'Reilly came up to me in an event and he said, you know, he's really tall, right? And he said, if I ever see Darren Star, I'm going to punch him in the face. And I was like, huh?

I was just like, what's happening? And he goes, I can't believe what he makes you guys do. And I was like, you know, we really love our show. Like, we're fine. We're fine. Thank you, sir. You know, he was like Aggressively critical that's such a microcosm of culture though Like a straight is he massage and it's like actually like verbally assaulting you about how they're gonna help you and you're like

I'm good. I know and then like what happens with him happens with him. I mean, it's fascinating, right? It's fascinating It's very fast coming from inside the house bill 100% from the ball. let me ask you this though. Let's talk about Big and Kerry, because I need like outside interpretation. Because for me also, I'm looking back on it, and I am kind of like amazed and confused a little bit about it.

Like I wasn't thinking objectively at all about it at the time. I fully understood that they had chemistry and that was really what mattered or whatever. And also I think he looks a little sad, you know? Like, pardon me, I just want to take care of him, but I mean, this is me slash Charlotte, obviously. But like, I had forgotten the very slow kind of dance they do.

It was truly like a very slow burn. It's very interesting. And I feel like that whole kind of like non-committal, again, like man boy. Because for me, like, I feel like in 2025, of like non-committal again, like man boy. Cause for me, like, I feel like in 2025, you're a man in your forties who's like divorced or like, or it makes money. It's like,

you need to like be able to be in tune with your feelings and say, I like you. This is a date. Like that's a low bar. But I feel like he was just like, Oh, it's a drinks thing. Oh. And there really was a true cat and mouse, even like when his friend came. Oh, I was like, Oh, but I love that Carrie true cat and mouse even like when his friend came dinner Oh, but I love the carry did that she was like, I'm goodbye. She's like are you are you kidding me? Like I know

She's so smart But for a man in his 40s to pull that is right is like insane And I'm like, it's probably more common than we would think but like oh, I think so I think men do all kinds of weird shit. But I also think that the person that's based on was a very, very powerful person in New York in the 90s, right? So we knew that and it was written in there. And I don't know when you're watching it, if you can really tell, but you know when

men are at a certain level of money and power structure, they're just like, I can do whatever I want to do. And you're going to follow along, lady friend. Exactly. You know when men are at a certain level of money and power structure, they're just like, I can do whatever I wanna do, and you're gonna follow along, lady friend. Exactly. Because you're lucky, you know? But she's like, no, I'm not gonna do that. Here's my money, buy some drinks. But she's charming about it, you know?

Like she's got game. I think that also might have been like, when I look back on it, a very like, the look on his face when viewed through the lens of their entire relationship, I think that might have been the moment where he decided to take her seriously because it was actually an expression of self-worth. Totally!

I feel like if Carrie stays through that date, like that's actually a really pivotal moment. If she's like, cool, I'll sit here with your divorced friend while he hits on people, then you're very much like, that's a very clear bet. Like it's a tale of what you will and will not accept. And for her to be like, oh, you're with your friend? I'm not gonna tell you how stupid this is. I'm not gonna tell you how incensed this makes me.

I'm gonna leave very casually with a smile, buy your drink and let you figure out how dumb you look right now. And I think that's the moment where you're like, like she's amazing, Carrie's amazing. It's like, you know what? And she's like, and you can hear her in her head, like, am I confused? But like, it's actually like we're getting the vulnerability of that moment as like the audience. Right. Voice over. But what he's getting is a woman being like, nothing like in the most

easy breezy beautiful colorful way being like, I don't feel this. Yes, yes. And he's like, wait, okay. I think like that in my mind, when I watched it back yesterday, it was like, that's the moment I think he kind of like fell in love or the game became real. Cause the first three episodes, he's an idea, he's a nickname, playing with her, Miranda, Miranda can't figure it out.

And she was number one litigation. She's like, Miranda's confused by him. I love that. And then she's like, no, thank You know, she's like, Miranda's confused by him. I love that. Yeah. And then she's like, no, thank you. And he's like, okay, cool. Then they see each other again and then she's walking away and she's like, it would have been so cool if I didn't look back. Exactly.

Which is also so good. But I mean, the other thing that I think when I'm looking at it is like their chemistry is so strong. Do you think that? I definitely, I think they would definitely like, whatever version of quote-unquote soul mates They are like when I look when I look at it now and my age through it like I think the women reach other Soul mates and the men are added into their lives

I think it's actually a love story between four women in reality like it's an expression of platonic love which makes the sex in the city Ironic ironic aspect of it. Yes, but their chemistry is super strong as like right yours as characters You know, there's something where like, even the way he just keeps orbiting her in the opening, like we saw her at a bris, we saw her at this, and then we finally decided to like, it made me miss the meet cute, because nowadays it's like somebody falls

to on Tinder or Instagram. Yeah, no, I know. And we don't even have rom-coms anymore. Really, yeah. Yeah, I mean, the only rom-coms they're making now are like older women, younger men, which I'm so fascinated by. So fascinated by. I started to live a double life when I was a teenager. Responsible and driven and wild and out of control. My head is pounding.

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Okay, let's talk for a second about Charlotte because I feel this is the first good storyline that Charlotte gets and I remember it all So clearly I remember literally dying when we had to do the read through Literally dying when I first read the script like oh my god. I've been wanting a storyline and now this is it Yeah, I mean honestly hyper realistic and to be real especially as a gay man timeless And I mean if you think about it now like Nikki Glaser stands up in her sitcom you know stand up there's a whole section on it where she gives like instructions right? Exactly.

But like back then you didn't say those words. Oh no that was crazy and she's just like let's do it the regular way and like that's crazy like again you guys are just broaching topics that have become like really trailblazing because again i feel like just dating in regards to anal sex is timeless universal it knows no it knows no demographic i know it's so funny that we're even saying this like it never would have crossed my mind at the time i just thought like wow i'm gonna have to just get through this because i need a storyline and i need them to write for Charlotte. And like when I was with Michael Patrick on the podcast

and we talk about, he remembers us at the read through because every episode still, we do like a old fashioned read through so that he can hear it. And you have to really perform. Like you have to say it loud. You can't just like mumble into your little microphone. You have to like hit those jokes or he will cut them, right?

It's like cutthroat type read through, right? I try to explain this to my young pretend children, like please be louder at the read through so that your stuff doesn't get cut. You know, and they're like, what? But anyway, back then we couldn't get through it. We couldn't get through it. The four of us were like falling off our chairs, you know?

Which has happened once since then when I had to say like some crazy thing to Harry the four of us were falling off our chairs, you know? Which has happened once since then, when I had to say some crazy thing to Harry and just like that, I can't even remember what it is, I blocked it out, but the four of us sometimes just get to laugh so hard. So when we went to film in the really, really old cab, like there are some old cars in the show,

but this cab was like 1975, right? I rewound that scene, because I was like, are they in the horse-drawn carriage? I had like the background of it. I was like, what is that? It is an old, old cab that had enough room for all four of us and the DP and the director are in the front seat with the handheld camera perched on the back of the front seat, which is a, you know, like banquet or whatever you would call it in a car, right? You know what it reminded me of was, remember Taxi Cab Confessions?

Yes! That might have been airing at the same time. I think it was! I was like, this feels like Taxi Cab Confessions. 100%! Another thing I should not have been watching and should not remember based on my age. I had forgotten about that! That was a good thing!

That was fascinating! It was like that. So, and that guy who plays the cab driver is so great. I had forgotten about that. That was a good thing. That was fascinating. It was like that. So, and that guy who plays the cab driver is so great. So, our director and our DP are there. They're like hiding under the camera and then they'd like, you know, put their heads up and give us a note.

And then we would have to do, we would have to go back around to do each take so that the background matched, which is funny because you can't really see anything, but like these are the things that we took seriously. So, I never said the words, the real words that I'm supposed to say until the take, the we're rolling, because I was just mortified, all right?

So we start, we're doing, it's like, they're like, this is it, we're gonna do it. So we go to do it, I can't say the words, I fuck up my line, because I can't say the words. And I was so embarrassed, because then we had to go around the whole of the time. And so Jessica's like, it's okay, it's okay, it'll be okay. You can do it, you can do it.

And then, of course, we pick up each one. And my reaction when she's like, we're going to go to, you know, whatever Miranda's address is, I'm like, no. And then they're like, we're going to Samantha's. I'm like, no. Like, it's very funny and very Charlotte, you know? I mean, it is. It very much was. I think it's very funny and very Charlotte, you know? I mean, it is. It very much was, I think it was just, it was very Charlotte, like, and again,

Charlotte has some of the more interesting lines and also just ends up, her arc is interesting because I feel like you are all such 360 human beings that were packaged in very palatable archetypes for the time. Yeah, I mean, we're only 360 beings because of our writers working so hard over the years. And, you know, we had Michael Patrick, but so many women. And I feel like it like everything kind of like slowly exposed itself when they're

giving you archetypes. And obviously those archetypes have lasted for decades now through like, you know, girls or like other Michael Patrick King shows, like like a younger or like a Emily in Paris. That's Darren's show. It's one girl, two guys and then like the actual world around her ends up being more important than those men which is a very interesting thing that I've seen in like in like those kind of and Darren Starr or Michael Patrick King etc. Right, right, right. No that's a good point. That's a good point. But a good point. Twilight or Hunger Games. Oh my gosh yeah. Those are kind of Sex and the City Coda where it's like which guy do I choose and like my friends actually helped me with that

Like that's so interesting I never thought of that. But yeah Charlotte, Charlotte's been dealing with everything but she deals with everything Through I feel like a bohemian Greenwich lens. That's what I call it like she was raised in Greenwich Those are her moors and those what she's that's what she's been told to like but I feel like Charlotte is actually a character through the entire series that just slowly becomes more herself to the point where you get to like and just like that and she's like Hyper-mohemian and like cult and like buying her kids condoms like that's like Interesting I want a man that she's like, I want a man. Now she's like, okay, do it in the house, don't get pregnant.

I know, it's so crazy, but I do think that's like a very relatable trajectory, you know what I mean? Like, you know, you kind of like, like that's how also I think her friends have influenced her. You know, cause people are still like, well, why were you friends with them in the beginning? I'm like, why wouldn't I be? Cause she wants to be them.

You know what I'm saying? Like. Or even the episode, there was an later episode, I think where after she maybe gets divorced or she's with Trey, where she's like, goes back to the girls with the green edge and she's like, I hate these bitches. Oh yeah.

She realizes she's the Samantha of that group. Yeah, she's like, oh yeah. And she throws the money at them. And she starts fighting about sex and then she's like, wait, these girls suck. Like, but. Right. That episode is how I ended up at the Jacques Mousse show in Nice. Oh wow I remember that. I literally. Yeah. He had a picture, Simone had a

picture of me with you know my young self in like a tank top with a sweater tied like so preppy and that was the inspiration you wanted me to wear that. I'm like babe it's so many years ago I can't wear that tank top. He was like, no, he was so sweet. It's like just maybe a shirt, you know? But that was his whole inspiration, which I was like, how random, but also how incredibly flattering. Yeah, I mean, that's so funny that like you guys

have been living these moments, or moments that you might have forgotten, or such canon or like, you know, like personality defining things for now a new generation of creatives that you're now working with. That's very interesting to me. We would never have, it never, never would have entered

our mind, like at this point still, this aired in 1998, which is hysterical, nothing had aired yet before this first season. We filmed the whole first season without anything on the air and no one knew what we were. So we weren't borrowing clothes at this point. Like we were hoping one day maybe we could borrow some clothes from somebody.

Like none of that had happened. It was a different world. But I have another thing I want to tell you about. So you know the scene after the cab scene. And I go back to the guy who's played by Josh Stenberg, who's a great actor. Like did you watch, F watch um Fleischmann is in trouble is that what it's called Fleischmann is in trouble? I did. He's on there he's really scary. That was a very disconcerting series. Right? I know but so good so good um he's a great actor he's been in so many

things I should have looked this up so I could list his things but he's a he's great and he was that guy the guy who wanted me to do the thing I didn't wanna do, which I'm just not gonna say. So we went, we filmed that scene. I still have that shiny blouse. I still have all these clothes from back then, which is kind of funny, because they're so boring, but I still have them.

And we filmed that scene, and I had been in acting class for like 20 years at this point, right, before the show got going. So to me, in acting class, they're always talking about high stakes, high stakes, high stakes. So I'm thinking about how much she wants to get married, how this guy's so perfect, but he wants her to do this thing, and how upsetting that would be, whatever.

So I'm very emotional. Darren came to me and said, you know, babe, we gotta re-film that. And I'm like, what? Like, I think it's the only time in my life I've had to re-shoot a scene based on my performance. And he said, listen, you know, this is just one guy. There's another guy around the corner.

And I was like, what? What? Like, to me, I did not understand that. Like, as a human being, I didn't understand that. And I didn't understand that from an acting perspective. But also, I didn't really know these girls yet. Like, they're real girls that they were based on. I don't know about that.

You know what I'm saying? So I was like, oh, God, there's another guy around the corner? Really? For Charlotte? Like, this is what she thinks? And he's like, yes, we've got to re-shoot this. I'm like, OK.

So we did. It's the only scene, thank God, in my career. That's crazy. I know, because he did not want me to have the high stakes, which I had never really been told don't't have high stakes you know I'm saying I mean that also for the time period that scene is groundbreaking One I'm glad and two I wanted to say like also for me rewatching the series It's so interesting and I'm not sure you've had a guest say this yet

how much almost like My like coming out is coded with watching you guys date because like as a kid I'm sitting here watching all these episodes and you're seeing sex for the first time. And now it's triggering me watching the first season and I'm like, Oh, this is when I first realized I was attracted to dudes. I wasn't saying anything. But I was like, that guy's hot. Okay. I was like, I'm also looking for a man that's 6'5 in finance. So I was like, I feel like Sex and the City kind of like taught me I was gay before I was even gay.

Cause especially for me, like Samantha's sex scenes are very much like, I remember, I literally remember being 13 and watching her have sex with that fireman. And the camera spinning around and I was like, yeah, that was good. In his butt. Glad we could be of help. You know, so there's so many levels.

I feel like everybody like, I'm sure you hate hearing people say like, oh, we grew up with you because we're still like experiencing it. Like, I still need my LTW Charlotte spinoff. I would like, I just want you guys as crazy, like Spence moms, like going and doing things.

Like that's my- That'd be great. Oh, you're gonna love the first episode then when we come back. I'm super excited about that. We're on a little adventure, me and LTW. We do have a good time. We do have a good time.

And also I personally, not that I'm ever wanting anyone to spin anything off from us. I always wanna be there, right? But like LTW could actually just have her own spinoff because her whole family is so fascinating. I've enjoyed the whole thing. I'm also like, I think I heard you guys talking

on like one of the last episodes about like the crazy reaction to like Miranda, but I'm like, that's what happens guys. Thank you. You have friends that make crazy decisions and you like them and they are the catalyst for your life Even like Charlotte when everyone Miranda first gets with Che and you're the picnic and you're like, huh? So explain what is what is happening with you?

But I think that's what I would like again That's such Charlotte in that growth calling the thing the thing like Carrie will be petting she'll still make a punch But she's not Carrie's not gonna cut through and be like, what the fuck is going on? It's true, but can I tell you about that scene? So Miranda, sorry, Cynthia was directing that episode, which is so crazy to remember, right? So she's in it, it's a big episode,

she's also directing it. So when I read that scene, I thought that Charlotte was being like kind of supportive, but gently questioning. You know, like how she does sometimes. Like, are you sure? We get there and Michael Patrick's like, yell at her! I'm like, what? What?

We're down at Battery Park? And he's like, yell at her! I'm like, ha! I can't yell at her! I'm so scared! She looks so mad. Like she looks so mad at me, you know? And you know, we have lost all boundaries between our personal and professional selves,

right? He's like, no, you got to yell at her because this is shocking. And I'm like, you're right, I guess. I mean, I thought it was all very exciting, but that has more to do with me, I guess, right? That she took this big leap, you know? Obviously, not everybody feels that way. And people are still have very strong feelings about it.

Very strong feelings. Incredibly strong. It's crazy. But I also take that as a compliment. Like we're 30 years later almost and people have strong feelings. Hallelujah. People do feel,

I think it's gotta be interesting for you almost like, and we'll, I'm sure we'll discuss it in a later date. I'm sure I'll meet you at some point in this life. Yay, you gotta come to the set, babe. People feeling like they have ownership over you guys and what you do or like, even like in the fan reactions, like even, I'll admit the first season, just like that, I was like, what?

I'm like, wait, actually it's been 20 something years. Like there are going to be different people. There was going to be different feel. Relationships change. Or like if I'm looking, I'm also, people are often looking for, I think people don't like change and I think yeah All they have when you guys sign off whether it was 2003 or the end of the second movie is like their idea of what's

Happened to you. Yes different instead of like reconciling it. They're like no be what you were 2003 I know I know I feel bad But the truth is is if we were what we were in 2003 nobody would want to see that exactly that would be sad You know you know yeah No, we had to create something new and we're just really lucky that we even get to do it in this Crazy world that we're living in you know what I'm saying like we were lucky in the beginning because in the beginning We were old you know that's what's also so funny when you rewatch. Like we look like little tiny children.

Children, still young. But we were over 30, which was like shocking, right? That there'd be a show where a bunch of 30-somethings were like stomping around New York in high heels. People were like, what? Like it was mind blowing, you know? But it's so funny how like honestly, again it is kind of universal,

because I've had, when I go back and look, it is kind of universal because I've had, when I go back and look at it and kind of like that, that episode triggered my memory of the rest of the seasons. Like I've had a lot of the things that happened to you, happened to me. Like I've had my friends have kids now. And I went in and I had a Chanel, a blood red Chanel boy bag.

And then one of the little kids spilled yogurt on it. And I was like, Oh no. I was like, I've never wanted to like, throat punch a four year old. But I was like, excuse me. And like one of the moms was like, well, you know, it wasn't even, it wasn't the mom

who was throwing the party was my friend, but it was the mom of the girl that did it who was fairly badly behaved. It was like, well, you know, we don't expend money on like things like that. And I'm like, bitch, you live in, Oh God. You live in Brentwood.

Talking about how is this eight million American dollars like totally, you know, I'm going to light your Tesla on fire and see how you feel about that. So I feel like that was like the Carrie Shoe episode where it's like, don't judge me and my life or like what I want. And I also think almost being like a gay man is like being a single gay woman in the 90s. So it's like people are used to it. Like they're used to the idea of you, but will change in very strange ways that you're like, excuse me, I'm just here existing even like so true.

I don't want kids. I like kids. Do I want? No. Do I want them? Not right. Right. I think that's very similar to what all of your characters are going through in different capacities, whether it's, you know, Samantha being like, no, Carrie kind of evolving with it, Charlotte being like, this is the goal. You know? Right, right, right, right. And you know, Miranda just kind of having had one,

like, oh, well, there we go, whoopsie daisy, now I gotta raise a kid, now I have a Brady. Totally, and I also think, like Michael Patrick talked about, he really felt that the time that he came, 1997, you know, that Michael Patrick talked about, he really felt at the time that he came, 1997, you know, that being a gay man, like he felt the other in the way that we single women at the time felt the other, but I still feel like it's not that different now

in a lot of ways. I think it's like, it's a very similar energy you get, and I feel like it's the energy of just basically like straight men not understanding you, and looking at the entire world through their purview and being like, oh, you don't want this. It's almost like straight men are like, like Miranda Priese, like everybody wants to be us. And we're like, no, we don't. Totally. Yes, it is like that. I feel like that as a single woman. Yes. Yes. And people

are like, but why? Why? And I'm like, oh my God, please stop asking me why I am like this. Even to this day, like when people ask the question, like they think it's a compliment, or like I'll get it online or from friends, or on a first date. How are you single? That's not, maybe I was sick. Maybe I was not prioritizing romantic love.

Maybe I have standards. Maybe I get a fair amount of love from my friends of 30 years. Yes! Maybe I want someone who's additive to my life. Yes! But you're acting as if pairing off monogamously is the default is actually really, really presumptuous and really condescending.

Yes! And I think that's why the spirit of the show continues on or it has been so seminally forced in people's lives. It's almost like you're getting four versions of being yourself, of authentically being yourself and having friends that don't judge you. Because I think seminal moments in all the episodes, whether it's this one,

whether it's the Carrie Blowjob, the FedEx guy, whether it's Charlotte getting mad about the pregnancy, it's those moments when you wanna judge, but they come back and be like, that was rude of me to do that to you. Like actually your life is different than mine. And I think that's why people are so attached to these characters,

because like it happens in all the cycles of their lives through divorces, through marriages, through babies, through cancer, through coming out as non-binary and moving to LA. You're just like, okay, I'm gonna question your decision-making, but I'm not gonna come in at LA, you're just like, okay, I'm gonna question your decision making, but I'm not gonna come in at like, my doesn't stink. And I like love that.

And I think going back to this episode, you kind of like really feel it in a similar way where again, like I'm gonna stand 10 toes down. This is where Carrie and Big Fall in love because Carrie asserts her standards. This is where Charlotte, actually when you think about it, like deals with the wildest stuff in the episode. asserts her standards. This is Charlotte. Actually, when you think about it, like

deals with the wildest stuff in the episode, because even like for me, I was like, oh, like, oh, wow, like Samantha, you slept with a 20 year old and like did it on your side. Like 1997 was a while she's like, we did it on our side and on our back and on our tummy. I'm like, so you rolled over. This was crazy. Like Charlotte's out there're dealing with butt sex and you're like, oh I'm crazy

because I did it on my left shoulder. It's kind of like you're right, all this, everyone is there. Was Charlotte like dealing with bohemian through a more traditional lens and like. You're right. I like this take, Blakely. I'm down with it.

I'm gonna write down that whole last thing you said and I'm gonna refer back to it, okay? When I get put on the spot. All right, thank you. Thank you'm down with it. I'm gonna write down that whole last thing you said and I'm gonna refer back to it, okay? When I get put on the spot, all right? Thank you. Thank you for being with us. Thank you for having me. This has been super fun. You're amazing. Yes, thank you. Good travels out there

and we wanna see you back here in LA. Yes, I'll be back in LA soon, I think. I don't even know, sometime soon, two weeks. I know, you're a jet setter, babe. We're trying. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. Y'all, what up? It's your girl Jess Hilarious, and I think it's time to acknowledge that I'm not just a comedian.

It's time to add uncertified therapists to my credentials, because each and every Wednesday I'm fixing your mess on carefully reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network. Got problems in your relationship? Come to me, your best friend acting shady. Come to me. Thought you was the father but you not? Come to me. I can't promise I won't judge you, but I can guarantee that I will help you. Listen to Carefully Reckless on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians,

policymakers and so many other fascinating people, like writer and actor Dan Aykroyd. I love writing more than anything. You're left alone. You know, you do three hours in the morning, you write three hours in the afternoon, go pick up a kid from school and write at night. And after nine hours, you come out with seven pages, and then you're moving on. Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Calling all Yellowstone fans. Let's go to work. Join Bobby Bones on the official Yellowstone podcast for exclusive cast interviews, behind the scenes insights, and a deep dive into the themes that have made Yellowstone a cultural phenomenon. Our family legacy is this ranch. And I protect it with my life. Listen to the official Yellowstone podcast now on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. We all have a moment that splits us wide open. On my new podcast, Wide Open with Ashlyn Harris, I'll sit down with trailblazers from sports, music, fashion, entertainment, and politics to explore their toughest moments and the incredible comebacks that followed. Listen to Wide Open with Ashlyn Harris, an iHeart Women's Sports production on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.