Are You A Charlotte? - "When Was the Last Time You Backed Up Your Work?" with Aasif Mandvi
Episode Date: May 8, 2026Aasif Mandvi returns to continue the conversation about this phenomenal episode. Aasif feels his wife is definitely a "Charlotte" but you may be surprised by which character he is most similar t...o!Kristin has a revelation about rewatching the show that she has to share.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hi, I'm Kristen Davis, and I want to know, are you a Charlotte?
Welcome back, everybody, to Are You a Charlotte, Part 2, us of Monve is here.
Thanks for joining us.
I'd love to get your opinion now on Miranda.
Well, this is when Miranda's mom dies.
it's like a lot going on.
By the way, this was a really good episode.
It's incredible.
Because I think it won an Emmy this episode.
You know what?
I don't know if it won an Emmy.
We should figure that out.
It should have because it's incredible.
I think it did win an Emmy this episode because.
If it did, I don't know who it won an Emmy for.
I think our whole season of this year won an Emmy.
Won the one an Emmy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I seem to remember this episode, because you know how sometimes they'll submit
certain episodes for the Emmys.
They don't watch the whole season.
Right.
No, I think you pick three.
Yeah.
And so I think this was such a great episode.
Me too.
It's written so well.
It's beyond.
This was their first TV job.
Was it?
It was their first script for our show and their first TV job ever.
Because it's really a well-written show.
It's beyond.
And the thing is the way they tie things together and to me the episode is about grief.
Yeah.
And Miranda's character, her mom dies.
And then that scene in the, when she's putting on the, she's trying on the bra with the woman.
And it's just so heartbreaking and real.
And then the whole thing with Samantha.
Losing her orgasm.
And you think, oh, it is, on one level, you're like, oh, this just feels sort of like cartoonish almost.
like, you know, like they're having the whole
those sex and those scenes.
And then you realize at the end that like,
oh, she does, it's all about.
I mean, you kind of know it is.
Right.
But then when she cries at the funeral at the end,
it's like, you realize like, oh,
that is what this is about.
Absolutely. And so it's, you know,
and how Charlotte is trying to like,
do, be perfect and manage it all with the thing.
They called me the Martha's George of Death.
Yeah.
I know. I'd forgotten that too.
They told me that yesterday.
day. I was like, oh, yeah, I forgot that was what I was doing.
Yeah. It's interesting. And I agree. I knew intellectually. And even Carrie's laptop dying.
Right.
It's about grief. It's about she's losing everything. Yes. All the things, you know, so it's, yeah, anyway.
I knew intellectually that this was one of my top three favorite episodes ever. Yeah.
But I haven't ever rewatched these things because I used to spend just energy trying not to rewatch, right? Like, if it was on, I just be like, you know, don't live in the past. But now I have a podcast where I rewerew it.
watch. So I was getting ready for yesterday. We had two episodes we were doing yesterday and
Julian and Lisa were coming. I was doing my makeup as I was watching. Huge mistake because it floored
me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Especially now so many years later with with so much more loss that
we've experienced, you know, personally and collectively, basically, but we were so innocent then
in so many ways. But yet it's so powerful. Yeah. What they wrote and what we all did and how it came
together.
It's incredible.
Is it interesting?
It's hard.
Is it hard for you to watch it and not, like, can you watch it objectively, I guess, and
not be like in the show, oh, that was the day that I wasn't feeling well.
I mean both, both, right?
Because as the actors, that is what we remember, right?
We remember the details of the life, our life, right?
And definitely there's a lot of that, in the earlier seasons, more so as we're getting
into third season and fourth season
where we did so many episodes.
Like it's coo-crazy like the olden days.
It's 18, fourth season.
How many was it third season, Hannah?
It's a lot.
You did 18 episodes on HBO?
That's crazy.
Can you believe that?
They never, like, now it's like.
It was a different world.
Yeah.
It was just a fully different world.
Yeah, yeah.
They were trying to do like a network schedule.
They were because back on,
I had been on Melrose Place before this,
as we were talking about earlier.
I believe that we did 36 episodes
in the season.
in a Melrose place.
Wow.
Yeah.
Wow.
Like you have to actually think that through like,
am I crazy?
But no, I'm pretty sure that's what we did.
So you were just working like two months off.
That was it.
Exactly.
You had Christmas and like a couple weeks in the summer.
But also part of it was because the format was different, right?
They didn't want you doing blocking.
They didn't want you moving around.
They wanted to cut in to this kind of a close up, right?
Like it was a specific format.
Whereas we were trying to do basically like a film.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
Yeah.
with so many short scenes tied together by her voiceover.
And our hours were super crazy long as I know my listeners hear me talk about this all the time.
But, you know, it was much more ambitious.
We were obviously overly ambitious in a wonderful way.
But when I look back on it, at the time I was watching it immediately because I was always so excited.
Like, how did it turn out?
And I was still learning myself, you know, like what worked and what do I feel like I could have done better?
But also, I was just a big fan at the time, right?
Like I thought everything that we did was great, I think.
With the exception of the first season, which we did before anything aired and I felt like it was uneven.
But when I look back on it, I love it, right?
So now with all of this time, I definitely can be way more objective and more involved in the actual show.
You don't know what I'm saying?
Like affected and like how a fan might feel.
I don't think I can totally be a fan, of course, right?
Because I still am thinking like, oh yeah, those shoes really hurt.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
But I feel like I had a couple weeks off because I was traveling and then I came back and I watched the show and this warmth.
I just felt like this incredible warmth like being with us.
And of course, I know them.
So it's a lot for me too.
But I feel like this is what the fans are and were experiencing.
Yeah.
And that is so incredible to be a part of.
Yeah.
You know?
It's made me understand it better.
The whole thing of it.
And it's great that, you know, because.
Because I think that when you have enough distance and time from it, you can actually watch it and enjoy it just for what it is.
Yeah.
Like I laugh.
Yeah.
You know, I don't remember all this stuff.
Right.
Right.
And it can surprise you again.
Yes.
Because so often you watch stuff and you're like, it's boring because I know exactly what happens.
Right.
And I intellectually know what happens, but I don't remember all the stuff.
And also I'm really in it.
And I'm like, wait, wait.
why did they break up again?
Like what's happening?
You know, even though intellectually I should know this,
but you get so involved.
Which brings me to my other relationship
that I want to ask you about as a straight man.
You're now representing all straight men.
I'm all straight guys.
What do you think of Steve and Miranda?
They're not so much prevalent in this.
Like Steve shows up,
which is very sweet for Miranda's mother's funeral.
But do you remember their vibe?
He's kind of less, like you were talking about your wife
being a lawyer
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I do remember.
Like I said,
I didn't watch all the episodes very,
like,
like,
right.
But I,
I remember that character.
And he was a bit,
am I remembering it correctly?
I felt like he was a bit more of like a,
he was less alpha.
Yes.
Like he was,
she's alpha and he's not.
It's interesting.
Right?
Like,
is not even a thing.
I don't know.
Yes.
But like,
but like,
like so.
it's interesting because Miranda's,
Miranda is so strong and so put together and so like sort of on top of everything.
And he seemed a little bit more.
It's like a kid.
Yeah, like a little kid, you know, which is another dynamic.
Yeah.
That is quite, you see all the time.
Definitely.
But they struggle with it.
It's interesting.
Like she's like, no, I'm not going to do that.
But then he just keeps coming and he's so open.
Yeah.
And she needs that.
And she needs that.
She needs somebody who is going to break through all of that, you know?
And he does.
Yeah.
It's kind of fascinating.
Yeah.
It's sometimes it's true.
And I think it's true.
Like my wife is, like I said to you earlier, is a very accomplished woman who is and sometimes has difficulty being vulnerable and being, you know, like the thing that she's really dealing with is not the thing that she's actually.
talking about
I understand
like there's a
it's hard for her
to have
to just sort of go
you know sometimes
because she's not a fall apart
kind of person
but it's good she's with an actor
person huh
it's good she's with an actor
yeah so when she's with me
I am always looking
for that you know
underneath yeah and and
and part of the
you know the dynamic
has been for me to recognize
that what I see is not all that there is.
Do you know what I mean?
It's like the thing that she's showing me is not,
and to have an understanding of that.
And sometimes I'm good at it
and sometimes I'm not as good at it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I do feel like it is just like I have my circle the drain thing.
Like that's the thing that she has,
which is that she's a little bit more like that.
Like she's like, I can't, I'm not going to fall apart.
Or I'm not going to.
I'm going to
I like like I need to control things
I need to maintain you know like I'm not
like who's vulnerability
like a Charlotte sometimes
yeah yeah yeah but like who vulnerability
is um yeah I mean
she's a Virgo you know so she's
love the Virgo's oh I love the Virgo's
she's like she's double Virgo
Oh interesting what are you
I'm a Pisces
I think I know that I'm like Pisces in so many
I like a Piscese's
23rd February
February 23rd.
Oh, okay.
I'm a February Pisces.
Are you on March Pisces?
Oh, there's such debate.
Yeah, I know.
You're right on the cusp.
Yeah, I know.
Our algorithms are going to show us a lot.
But I have no, I read Aquarius.
I'm like, no, I'm nothing.
Because I have Pisces sun, Pisces moon, Pisces.
Oh my God, you have Pisces moon?
I mean, so many.
Are we getting into this now?
Right.
Is it scary?
Isn't it scary?
Something else like Mercury or, I get mixed up.
But the only thing that I have that's not Pisces is I have.
I have Ares rising.
Oh, wow.
Thank God.
Interesting.
Okay.
Thank God.
Sure what I'm saying.
Yeah.
So that's how you present in the world.
Is it?
Do you think?
Well, that's what I, that's what I have understood.
Okay.
The sun sign is,
if you go down this road,
if you believe in this,
why not, it's fine.
Like the sun sign is who you are.
Right.
Your moon sign is how you see yourself
and your rising sign is how you present sometimes in the world.
Which makes sense.
You know?
I do think that people do feel like I'm a Pisces though,
which I'm glad because I do really feel like I'm a Pisci.
Yeah.
I feel like, you know, sometimes I don't want to leave my house or the garden.
Yeah.
I want to look at the sunset.
If it were up to me, all I would post on Instagram would be pictures of the sunrise and the sunset and bodies of water.
Right, right, right, sure.
It would be so much fun.
No.
But I have to function.
Yeah.
I have to get out there.
Pisces are incredibly, like my son is a Piscese.
Fantastic.
Yeah.
And we're highly emotional.
We actually are often found in artistic world.
Thank God.
Because we have real sensitivity and we have real access to our own emotions and all that stuff in a good way and sometimes in a bad way.
100%.
But, you know, yeah, we're natural performers sometimes.
That's true as well.
That's true as well.
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I'm not going to go too far into this,
but my most longest relationship was with a Virgo man.
So I totally think it's a good, good, good.
Well, Virgo and Pisces are directly opposite each other.
Yes, fascinating.
And they, you know, they kind of balance out the other side of it.
But they also, so in the best way,
she's all the things that I'm not,
and I'm all the things that she's not.
And then on the struggle side, the things that she is and the things that I, like,
her thing also scares the shit out of me sometimes and my thing scares the shit out of her.
Because she's very like, she can be very absolutist in things and very kind of like,
the way it is, this is the way wrong, right, good, bad.
And Pisces are like, you know, it's all really.
Totally.
Well, we can see both sides.
I can be like, well, yes, but the other side is blah, blah, blah.
Or just like, but you know, it's all relative, right?
And we are such relative.
And one of the biggest arguments that my wife and I ever got into was like about relativism versus absolutism.
Because she was like your, because she was like your relativist.
So how can I?
And this was so funny because she was like, this is early in our relationship when we were first dating.
And she was like, how can I trust that you will feel any the same way tomorrow?
Like tomorrow you could go, you could wake up and.
go and go, I don't want this anymore.
Like, how can I depend on you?
And I was like, and I was at the time, I wouldn't say this today, but like, because I'm
smarter, but like at the time I was like, I was like, yeah, I mean, tomorrow I could, but isn't
that true about everything in life?
And she was like, I can't be with you.
Like, you're totally undependable.
Like, like, I don't know where you're going to, it was like an episode of sex in the city.
Totally.
Because it was like, she was like so like, oh my God, if I can't depend on you.
you to be here forever and, you know what I mean?
And I was like coming from, it was like, we can't depend on anything.
We don't even know the world is going to be here.
This is so true.
You know?
This is so true.
What are you talking about?
To me, it was like, it was like she was just like talking some other language and she was
going, wait, but I need you to say that I'm here.
I'm the certainty.
There's absolutism, the certainty.
was like, I'm water.
Yeah.
Like, I just flow.
I don't know.
We could go anywhere at any time.
It's so true.
It's like that George Harrison song, you know.
Listen, another Pisces, man.
Oh, another Pisces, there you go.
Exactly, yeah.
You know, what is that?
The universe across the universe.
I don't know.
What is that?
Which one is that?
But I love across the universe.
The lyric is, um, you ask me, will my love grow?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, so good.
Well, I don't know.
I don't know.
That's such a Pisces.
Such a good song.
It's such a Pisces lyric.
Listen, I'm not even in a relationship and you're reminding me of all the reasons why.
Because sometimes you're like, I don't know.
Yeah.
I don't know.
No, I have my children and I do know.
That's the thing.
Yes.
When it's your kid, it's different because you're like, I'm like in it for the law.
There's no.
Our souls are combined.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
And, and, yeah, it's a different thing.
Like, like, you realize that, like, once you go, when you have a child, you're like,
well, I'm in this forever.
And it doesn't matter.
No.
Like, there's no exit here.
Nothing matters other than that.
Right.
And that is the thing that you realize about when you're married as well.
Like, you go, like, oh, like, either one of us would, would throw the other one under a bus for him.
You know what I mean?
Like, I'm like, if she came down to it, you had to choose.
to choose. I mean, and I also really kind of
respect that and I would imagine she does too, right?
Because you've made this life together.
Yeah, yeah. No, it's, you know, and that is
the, I mean, that is, and in a weird way, like, it's,
our son benefits from the fact that my wife
and I are such opposites.
Yeah.
We're not entirely, I'm making it sound like we're so, of course,
there's a lot of overlap and a lot of areas where we
are actually quite similar because it finally,
she has a Pisces moon.
Yay.
So, you know.
That's good.
She sees herself as, you know, like, it's interesting.
That's good.
So there's a lot of overlap in that way.
But he gets the benefit of my sort of, you know, creativity and sort of like, it's all fun.
It's all right.
And then her kind of like, no, we have to be on time at school.
And I'm like, everybody's a little bit late.
So funny.
I think my Aries Rising helps me with that a little bit, right?
And also like when I did decide to be a single mom, I was like, oh, I've got to try to ground myself to the planet Earth.
Yeah.
Because that's what these kids need, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
It's an ongoing struggle.
Yeah.
I mean, it is.
And you know, look, there are sometimes that I'm just like, you got to, you got to put your shoes on at some point.
Like at some point today, we have to get the shoes on.
Right.
But that's a joy for a kid.
Because I feel like our world is all about.
like here, here, here, here, do this, do that, go faster.
It's great to have a parent that's going to give you some breathing room.
Yeah, it is true.
And what I've realized is that it's in, you know, I had a kid later in life.
Me too.
And so I'm like, you know, you get a little bit sort of jaded and you sort of like seen it all.
Like you're like, but then you go, oh, right, like he's just in this play.
my son is in play mode all the time.
He's in his imaginary, like he got up this morning and decided he was,
he has this little box of band-aids, like kitty band-aids.
And he was like, I'm the band-aid man.
And he's like running around the house screaming, I'm the band-aid man.
Does anybody need a band-a-band-a?
Does anybody hurt?
And so, and we're just trying to like, go like, dude, he's got to get your shoes on.
Just get your shoes on.
He's like, I'm the band-ed.
And I'm like, oh, I have to, you know, like, he's in his own, like, imaginary world.
Which is beautiful.
And it's a beautiful thing.
Yeah.
And, uh, but it's that balance of like, that is beautiful and I love you because of all that.
Yes.
And at the same time, we do have to get to school.
Totally.
I, I'm there as well.
And also with my own self, right?
You know what I mean?
Like, you know, especially like when I have to do things like where I have to look back,
I can just go back.
Like yesterday, when I was having to.
rewatch this. I'm just back there. But then I'm also here with all the loss that we've had.
Thus, Julian Alisa come and I cried like five times. You know what I mean? But I love them and it's
fine. And my sweet listeners put up with me. But then you're here and you have your whole,
your whole life, which is fascinating and joy, you know, and we can go there, which is also
wonderful. Right. And the show has all those things in it. And also was so long ago, but is still a
live.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it's all very interesting.
Yeah.
It's so great that you get to like sort of revisit it and process through all
of that again.
Wait, I have a question.
What?
Are you a Charlotte, awesome?
Oh.
I don't know if I'm a Charlotte.
Okay.
I don't think I am a Charlotte.
No?
Who do you think you are?
Maybe I'm more of a carry.
I kind of think you could be a carry.
I'm more of a carry.
I like that.
I'm a little bit more neurotic and sort of, you know,
unsure.
Yeah, she's figuring things out.
She's curious.
Yeah, yeah.
And I'm a writer as well, so.
That it.
Cool.
I'm just, yeah, I don't think I'm as fastidious as Charlotte.
Well, listen, neither am I.
You know.
I mean, she's very, that's why I feel like she's a Virgo, but I don't think she
technically is a Virgo, but like she seems like a Virgo.
She seems like a Virgo.
Doesn't she?
Right.
I agree.
I agree totally.
She seems, but then she seems like a Virgo with a Pisces moon.
Definitely. Definitely. Like your wife.
Maybe my wife is a Charlotte.
Yay. Yay. Yay.
She's very good. She's very good at entertaining.
Well, fantastic.
In Charlotte, I think, is very good.
Very into entertaining. Yeah.
Yes. So that's true. So there you go.
Many, many connections. I like it.
Thank you so much for having me.
You're a joy for being here. I can't wait to watch your show.
Yeah. Please do the miniature wife.
Super curious.
I'm on Broadway and Fallen Angels until June 7th.
Amazing.
And then we never really talked about it, but I have another show, a horror show called Terror, Devil, and Silver.
It's coming on May 7th.
Where how?
AMC Plus.
AMC plus.
And shudder.
And then later in the year, it'll come out on regular AMC.
But it's like a, it's like a scary, it's a scary show.
It's a scary show.
Like, solidly.
I know.
It does seem that way.
And I was saying to you before.
Like, yeah, it's like, everything comes out at once.
And then people are like, you just everywhere.
Just take it.
And I'm like, I'm mostly just.
my house.
Do you say thank you?
Thank you.
It's going well.
It's going well.
And I'm so happy for you.
Thank you.
Thanks so much.
I want you to be on Gilded Age as well.
I do too.
Yes.
Another podcast from some SNL late night comedy guy, not quite.
Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends.
Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier.
This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an
A cappella band with their between songs banter.
Where does your group perform?
We do some retirement homes.
Those people are starving for banter.
Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until Karma made her pay for it.
All right, Sophia, tell me about how we started this story.
She moved in for two weeks, lasted five days, left a mess, and then pressed her ear against their bedroom door and burst in screaming.
When kicked out to a hotel, she called her son-in-law's workplace, pretending his partner had been rushed to the hospital by ambulance.
She faked a medical emergency.
And spoiler, that was just the beginning.
To find out how it ends, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hey, this is Robert from the Stuff to Blow Your Mind podcast.
Joe and I are both lifelong Star Wars fan, so we're celebrating May the 4th with a brand new week of fun, thought-provoking Star Wars-related episodes.
Join us as we tackle science and culture topics from a galaxy far, far away,
such as the biology of tauntons and wampas on the ice planet hot,
or the practicality and corporate business sense of the Sith rule of two.
Listen to stuff to bowl your mind on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
A win is a win.
A win is a win.
I don't care what I'm saying.
Yep, that's me.
Clifford Taylor the 4th.
You might have seen the skits, my basketball and college football journey,
or my career in sports media.
Well, now I'm bringing all of that excitement
to my brand new podcast, The Clifford Show.
This is a place for raw,
unfilled conversations with athletes, creators,
and voices that not only deserve to be heard, but celebrated.
So let's get to it.
Listen to The Clifford show on the IHeart Radio app,
Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.
And for more behind the scenes,
follow at Clifford and at TikTok Podcast Network on TikTok.
This is an IHeart podcast, guaranteed human.
