Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Chazz Palminteri: A Bronx Tale

Episode Date: April 15, 2021

Kippy and Foley are back with a game changer! Chazz Palminteri redefines the level of CLASS we are used to. It was such a fun episode. Enjoy!  Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AYGLiveShows​ PATREO...N: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage​ https://www.fumessential.com​ https://www.MintMobile.com/Garbage​ https://Stamps.com​   Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/​ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hold on there partners before we get this show started We got a real special announcement from down here at amp to these basement Uncle Hank and kippy a couple of city slickers are gonna be heading out down south We're gonna be at Raleigh. Good nights in North Carolina April 20th. It's coming up the next night We're gonna be in Zaney's Nashville. So get some Tex. Yeah guys. It's gonna be a good time We're gonna be doing some live stand-up T bones coming with us And then we're gonna be doing some live a yg with you guys you guys are gonna give us questions We're gonna be asking you questions. So grab some friends. Come on out. It's gonna be fun
Starting point is 00:00:35 We're gonna be shitting on your stupid uncle Ted or whoever comes your buddies your buddy Steve who's an asshole It's gonna be a good time. I'm correct. Don't be showing up with sneaks and no socks on we're gonna rip on you We're gonna we're gonna be having some beers. We're gonna be taking some pics. We're gonna be hanging out. We'll see you there Now let's get the show started Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage? the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or Absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H. Foley Hey
Starting point is 00:01:13 Everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast This is our you garbage a show we sit down with our guests to determine whether they're group to be classy or to Just a big old piece of trash. I'm your hostage Foley coming at you on a beautiful day We're down here at Aunt Toody's basement. She is not here. No, I had the guy put her on a casino bus I got her out of town if she knew who we was coming in. Yeah, there'd be panties getting thrown at the guy It'd be extra large panties getting thrown at the guy couldn't even have it I didn't want to embarrass us. So she's down at the Bergata for the weekend on our dime Put it on your credit card. Thanks. So we got that out of the way my co-host is coming at you from right next to me
Starting point is 00:01:55 He is the CEO of are you garbage? He's really an international businessman when you when you get right down to it He's got his toes and a lot of pools around the around the globe sure Kevin James Ryan everybody. Hey gang Thanks for tuning in as always, please make sure you rate review subscribe on itunes a full video available on YouTube Those numbers are fucking true to roof right now through the roof through the roof and also patreon.com slash are you garbage? You can sign up you can get bonus episodes a yg episodes of hard feelings and we do a live stream every month with the top tier members It's a good time. Oh, yeah, check it out gang and how about a nice shout out to our producer extraordinaire the magic man He keeps us looking good. Give it up for T-Bone McMuffin Toby McMullin everybody. What up boys T-Bone I'm so excited and nervous at the same time we vacuumed before he got
Starting point is 00:02:48 Before he got here and star power gang We could not be more excited to have our incredibly incredibly incredibly special guests here with us today Academy Award Nominated yes, not the usual bums. We have walking through this dump. All right This gentleman has appeared as an actor in 78 films and television shows Some to mention would be of course a Bronx tale bullets over Broadway the usual suspects Mulholland falls Hurly burly. I night at the Roxbury Analyze this Stuart little down the earth running scared a guide to recognizing your Saints modern family He's gonna be in the new law and order organized crime and he's gonna be in the godfather of Harlem coming out
Starting point is 00:03:30 Okay, he also owns multiple restaurants. He has his own show called the Chas Palman Terry show ladies and gentlemen He's got five fingers, but he only uses three Give it the fuck up for the one the only mr. Chas Palman Terry Thanks for coming in You know, I love the show I watch it, you know And I just laugh because you know, I grew up with a lot of garbage So I said are you gonna I said what a great show that is so thanks for having well the way the way we look at it All right now, of course, you know, everybody wants to know are you garbage if you are I'm not gonna say it
Starting point is 00:04:06 All right, but I guarantee you're not so we're kind of looking at you as more of a barometer of class Yeah, well, I appreciate that. Yeah, you're a very classy guy. You carry yourself very well. Thanks You know what I mean very well put together all the time I don't know too many people that look better in a suit than you I wear suits a lot But I get this feeling every time I put on a suit, I feel like I want to slap somebody Before you got here, I said that when he slapped someone in a suit Nobody else looks as good as him slapping somebody
Starting point is 00:04:36 As soon as I put on a suit people go, I get nervous. I think you're gonna slap me Well, I can always feel you like yeah, like tight on the cover on bottom. I'm like whoa You should have your own version of cameo where people hire you to smack people around You give me you put on the suit and you give me a little bit of a smack Yeah, you know, I gotta be honest with you I'm I'm legend for I do I teach master classes and I'm legend for not women of course men I'm legend for if an actor can get the right mood or you can't do it I say look is it a right if I do whatever I want to do give a smack. I'm legend for smack
Starting point is 00:05:15 That's true 100% believe it. I'll smack with the best of my hand to God. I'm not kidding I'll smack him and I say and he'll go. I go. All right. Now. Do the I go now do the scene again. Come on You know in Bronx tale that scene with a little when I'm smacking him and that scene when he's up You know, he couldn't get it, you know, and I turn to the narrow and I said Bob You know, we we filmed like four or five takes. I said he's still not there yet. So Bob says I said Bob I gotta do what I gotta do. He goes. What's that? I go, let me let me just do it. I do it up
Starting point is 00:05:48 You gotta and I said come on bam, and he went I went come on bam, bam, and he was like Bam, I said never mind why just say the fucking words 20 minutes over lunch Let's go and because I said Bob just keep filming they kept filming. Yeah, I said say the fucking he was a sonny I'm sorry son. You started and he got past it But that was the only way, you know, he was young, you know, he's young actor. Yeah, and he's terrific actor But sometimes you got to get you know, you got to get a little rough But the fear of God in him, you know what I mean? That's funny to think if you told him to Nero
Starting point is 00:06:24 Hey, let's go take a walk. No, I just said Bob said do what you got to do and I said, okay Here we go. Yeah, you're also one of the very few people in show business can call deniro Bob Yeah, and it's so the only one that can do it. Yeah, everybody else is trying to be like you when they here's the deal with People who really have Bob's friend call him Bob. Yeah people who are his family Call him Robert people that claim to know him, but don't know him call him Bobby So whenever you give away whenever you somebody go, hey, tell Bobby I said hello, you don't fuck You don't fucking know him. Hey, you know me and me and Bobby we grew up together They don't fucking know some 25 year old says that yeah, we grew up together
Starting point is 00:07:13 Yeah, yeah, I I had always thought and that's why I would like to you know You're upbringing is well documented like we said, yeah I'm curious about the years right before Bronx down because I had thought just you know naturally when I was younger That it was like you came up with like deniro and Pesci Well, I studied I was ten years younger than right, okay So they're older than I am when I was at the active studio don't forget Al and those guys were ten years They were ahead of me. So I was always behind them. Mm-hmm, you know, but I I
Starting point is 00:07:46 Started in films 30-something years ago. So I I made a lot of movies with Al with with with Bob I made four movies with Bob. So people do put us together But I was 10 year I'm 10 years younger than those guys and you were like you were like a proper like struggling working actor Yes before yeah, I had a Broadway credits before that but I you know, that doesn't mean anything when you go to Hollywood Fuck about that. You know, you got to have you got to be a star. You got to be somebody, right? You know, that's the way it was. So, you know, it's okay. That's crazy. So That that that was the whole thing that I want to focus on. So you were in New York City as like a working actor Oh, yeah, I was I was well, you were a little bit older. I was older. Yeah, I mean, I didn't make it till I was
Starting point is 00:08:29 Well, I was 39 when I made it when Bronxdale hit Bronxdale hit. Yeah, and you did that on your own, right? Yeah, I mean, I'll tell you, you know, I'll tell you I'll try to make the story I was working as an actor going on But then I also worked as a doorman at a club 1982 called the limelight, right? I think I think I might have worked with somebody that my brother knows a friend of our family guy named Phil frack Phil frack is any you remember got him Phil frack is any the name sounds familiar. Okay? Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Fuckin 19 calls I got mention mention Phil frack. Oh, I said hi
Starting point is 00:09:18 Yeah Don't feel I said hi. I wanted to I went to a restaurant once this guy goes jazz throws his fucking arms Right and my wife is probably right and the first thing he says he goes. How's your mom and dad? So that threw me I said, oh shit Somebody yeah, I go no, they're great. Yeah, he's totally because I go. Yeah, this is my wife Oh, how are you? He goes and he turns to do the pay people to take because we grew up together meanest guy, right? Meanest guy will like best friends, right?
Starting point is 00:09:50 And I saw he goes he goes, you know my cousin. He sold that Corvette. He kept for years. I went really how much you get I Tells me I go. Whoa. Oh, I finally made I'm talking about his cousin. I don't know who the fuck this guy is I Walk away my wife goes. Who is that? I go, honey? I have no idea We're going away next weekend with them pack the bags But you're right, you know, you just be nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course I thought that was gonna be guaranteed from from how much pushback I got from my family I'm telling you, he knows him. He knows him. He knows him. I don't make me look better say
Starting point is 00:10:29 I mean, you know, it's it's 35 40 Yeah, you know, people go jazz, you know, I get people come over me you do Broadway show you walk out He signed autographs, right? I come out and the guy goes jazz Jazz I go. Yeah, he goes. Why you don't remember me. I go I'm sorry. He goes brother day gets class eight grade I Like excuse me. It was yesterday. You're a hundred pounds more. No fucking hair Not little Timmy anymore. Okay, exactly. Yeah. No, anyway, okay. I go on his rinse
Starting point is 00:11:06 But it's also that just thought like everybody once you get famous everybody goes. I know You're not going. I know Timmy from St. Bobby's. Yeah Everybody remembers you you don't fucking remember everybody else jazz. It's me. Oh my god, Timmy Timmy look at you. You still fucking driving a bus So I was in in New York working as a as a doorman bodyguard for this guy Pedigation who won the limelight because I used to box, you know, my father was a professional. Are you a big guy? Bigger guy or just yeah, I mean, yeah, how I am. What do you want to get slapped around? For my code
Starting point is 00:11:52 You know, you just met me you're not my fucking friend So start smacking you around Anyway, no, so I was working about his body, you know, guys, you know box and whatever so what happened was He finally said, hey, you know, I want you to run this club in Chicago and I said no, I want to go to LA and try my luck there So I said he won't you offer me like a lot of money to manage this club plus having bring the car I said no fine me so I could go to LA and collect unemployment. This unless I was I went to LA. I like as soon as I got that boom. I got a Hill Street Blues couple of those shows
Starting point is 00:12:27 I broke down a couple of those Hill Street Blues Madlock Dallas, right couple of Peter Gunn a miniseries And I was doing okay, you know, okay, okay Yeah, but then I ran out of money again like in about two years later I was holding that money and I ran out of that. We all know the deal They were going through it right now So I said, well, I'll start working as a door again, you know, as a you know, do I mean So I worked at this real swanky club and I was doing well there to supplement my income is it was auditioning and then one day I'm at the door. Now, there's three things you can never do to a bouncer three things
Starting point is 00:13:00 You'll never get in the club if you and if you do one of these three If you do one of the fingers and you're scaring us Here are the three things guys. The first thing is you never say the words. Do you know who I am? Yeah, of course, you're done. You say that to a guy in the door. Fuck you. You're not getting What I always say is yeah, if I knew who you are you'd be on the fucking list You know, you'd be in there dancing, right? That's what the second thing is you never grab the rope never like grab the velvet rope Yeah, that's like, yeah, and the third thing is you never get in his space The door man's face this guy walks over grabs the rope gets in my face and says, do you know who I am he broke all three rules
Starting point is 00:13:48 So I broke all three ribs because he said I'm late don't you know and I said I'm sorry So yeah, so then I said something really smart in he goes. I'm telling you do you know who I am then I finally said yes You're the guys not getting into Look to me said you'll be fired in 15 minutes. What it's what he said to me I'll never forget it. He made a big ruckus people went inside. They called the boys the boys came out and went Swifty and I went Swifty and I heard I heard the name Swifty It was Swifty lasar now you guys are too young Swifty lasar was the biggest agent in the world In entertainment in the world and I me an actor just told
Starting point is 00:14:32 He looks at me 15 minutes later, I'm fired Fired the boys said I love you man. I love each other, but he has he goes that was his party You were keeping him out of his own party. I said, oh shit. So I said look you've been good to me I said to the owner. It's okay. Don't worry about I got it back into my 1972 Honda Civic with the fucking But that dent in it with the water leaking. I got back to my shit apartment. I got it to the I sat down there at the edge of My bed. I see I saw this little thing. It said the saddest thing in life is wasted talent It's a car that my father gave me and he's the one who said that my dad
Starting point is 00:15:10 I looked at that. I said, you know what if they won't give me a fucking pot I'll write one myself So I went to thrifty drugstore and threw a boulevard at that time I got five tabs of yellow paper and I started said what am I gonna write about I said I'll write about the killing that I saw when I was nine because I always thought about I said and I'll talk about my father and sony the wise guy And how the difference Influenced me growing up. So I wrote like five minutes
Starting point is 00:15:38 About five minutes of it and that monday I got fired on a saturday that monday. I performed it on at my theater workshop So I did exactly what you guys do it comedians What I put I got up there and I started doing the monologue and acting some of the scenes And out of the five minutes, I kept three minutes And then I wrote during the week another 10 minutes that are not 10 minutes the next week I kept four more minutes and I did that for a year So at the end of almost a year, I had 90 minutes
Starting point is 00:16:11 Of shit that worked, you know, yeah When you wish that process, right? So I said shit. I got 90. I got I got this one man's show. I said I said it But I never did it all it's an entirety yet like to get I did 40 minutes 20 minutes And finally I said I got to produce this thing. So I called my friend pedagation up And I said peter I always wanted to be in business. I said, uh, could you send me some will you like to invest in a play? I go, it's not a movie. I know you want to be in movies, but this is a play. He goes. Let me think about I said, okay next day knock on my door. I opened the fucking door
Starting point is 00:16:47 This guy standing there. He goes, you're trying to find out. I go, yeah, I signed here. I signed here He gives me a um fedex and I open it up and there's like $40,000 damn in cash or a check. No, no, no check. Okay. I was like, what the fuck? 40,000 All the fives and tens So I got it. It was a check for like 40 g So I call him up. I said peter I said, you didn't even read it. You didn't even know what he goes. You know, I saw you in a couple of plays and
Starting point is 00:17:20 I believe in you. You got talent. That's awesome. There's that. It's amazing. I get the 40,000 So I produced the play myself I put it up Fuck bam. I fucking Korea just fucking exploded There was a guy that we're talking about it so much a guy from the la times went to see it And he just raved about it. You know, it's one of those reviews your mother would write. Yeah Incredible genius whatever, you know, he said he's incredibly never been done before it is a one-man show But see I did a linear story. I just didn't drink water and didn't do an act
Starting point is 00:17:51 I did a movie on stage by myself And so everybody was coming to see it Nicholson came Pacino came Every director came every producer came. Are you shitting your pants at that point when you're the like when they're like dineros out there? No, no, well, he wasn't there yet 60 seat theater. We had a move to a 300 seat theater with so many people Still I was selling out They offered me I get a phone call at my house. It might dump me apartment $250,000 from the first studio that called I got $200 in the bank
Starting point is 00:18:27 $250,000 I said, well, yeah, but I want to play sonny and I went all right, excuse me. They said Look guy, you're great. You're terrific Let the professionals take over for me. It's like Heisman. Yeah And so we want a number one guy to write the screenplay. We just want to buy his story. I said, no, it's my fucking life I say no Three weeks later $500,000 they called back Five what I would have to oh god. I got
Starting point is 00:18:57 $200 in the bank no money $500,000 Play selling out, but the money that I'm getting I'm paying peter back and I'm paying my people there, right? Right? I'm making no money Finally, I signed with the William Morris at the time And I signed with them great agency fantastic agency as a matter of fact shout out Let me tell you something about William Morris. I'll tell you ICM
Starting point is 00:19:24 CAA and William Morris were all after me chasing me a week before Brock still I couldn't I wasn't all out on the block Okay, now they're all chasing me. So finally I call up William Morris and I say look I said I can't Uh, this is before while this is going on. I called him up. I said, look, I can't make the meeting today I have to this is a side story. I they say, why can't you make it? What happened? You signing with somebody else? I said, no, no, no, my car is overheating because I had a hole in the radiator and it was slowly overheat 72 honda 72 honda It's working. That's like yeah, it's like the hollywood story. It's working comic shit. You gotta exactly
Starting point is 00:20:00 So they go, uh, stay right there. Don't move. We'll we'll get right back to you. I'm like Liko and I'll take my age. Liko and fred west. I'm a fucking great guys, man They fucking I always I get a knock on the door. I open the door guy goes you charge. Probably I go You got another 40k. What's going on? I'm excited, right? Every time every time I see these guys something happens He goes come with me. I go where you going? He goes come with me. I go dance there. I go into the fucking Parking lot now you remember, you know, I'm with all broke
Starting point is 00:20:36 actors He goes I look and I see a 1989 brand new Cadillac, El Dorado Black black saddle interior gorgeous. He goes. Here's your keys. William Mars got this for you. Don't be late for the meeting Damn New caddy. Holy shit Are you fun? I'm like, what? What what am now my car is right next to the Cadillac smoking?
Starting point is 00:21:06 So This girl comes over to me smoking This girl comes over and she goes chaz. Holy shit. Everybody's coming out. All these All these perks come back. People are coming out. Chaz, hey I said no, I just got this car. So she goes chaz I I need a car She goes, can I have this one? I said, well, I yeah, she goes, how much you offer it? I said, uh How much you got? She goes 40 bucks. I go good deal Sold the car for for $40
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Starting point is 00:26:55 m o b i l e dot com slash garbage and cut your wireless build a 15 Clams a month crazy at mint mobile.com slash garbage Now back to the show What damn this is how bad this how crazy it was. It's not nuts or what I signed with them Yeah So anyway, get back to the thing everybody's coming everybody's coming. So finally I signed with them. They say we got another meeting to go to I said, all right, they take me to this other meeting big studio Guy has a piece of paper right here. We sit down 12 people sitting down. Let's forget it got a piece of paper
Starting point is 00:27:31 He's holding a paper. He slides it over to me goes chaz We know what's going on in hollywood. Everybody wants this We'll tell you something right now if you sign that paper You'll have a check tomorrow for $1 million I'm sweating right now thinking about that. What do I say the first thing out of my mouth? I say Is there a bathroom here? So he goes, yeah, there's an executive bathroom right there. They give me the key. I walk over I walk out I go into this beautiful executive bedroom and I'm by myself in it
Starting point is 00:28:01 I'm taking deep breaths a million dollars, right? $200 in a bank. I could help my mother father who never had money I could help them. I could really course. It's not just for you anymore. I'm not married. I'm single. So it was okay So finally I I look at the thing I put my hand in my pocket and for some reason I put my The card with me a football. I don't know why I took the card the other thing in life was wasted So I put it back. I look in and I go I wash my hands but wash my face. I look at him here and I go Fuck it
Starting point is 00:28:28 And I walk back out and I say to them. I said look I'll sign that paper And I could see the role like oh god. I said but I play sunny and I write the screenplay And the guy just went like this Ah He said chazz chazz We can't make a movie with you in it. You're a wonderful actor
Starting point is 00:28:48 But nobody knows you he goes. We can't make a movie. We have to make it with a star We can't make it with you and I said, well, I'm sorry. I said I can't do it So I said that meeting's over. I guess I stood up by two way. I'm not gonna hyperventilate my two agents are looking at me Like what the fuck give us give us the car back Yeah, you just cost me a hundred k. What the fuck right chazz guy stinks. I stood up I stood up and they said they walked out with me No, as I'm walking out the the guy goes the head of the studio says hey chazz You know, uh, this movie won't get made
Starting point is 00:29:24 Just like that. I said, you're right. It won't With you But it will get made and he goes what makes you so sure I said because it's too fucking good Nice That's what I said. I love it. That's what I said. I'll never forget it my hand to god And I walked out with my agents and they're looking at me like there's fucking guys. He's nuts Yeah, right. I started doing the show again
Starting point is 00:29:47 crowds kept coming all these big producers kept coming Bert Reynolds came Ray Scharke came everybody they all wanted to play sonny And all these big writer directors wanted to direct it finally I'm there and I get off the stage and all of a sudden they say to me Robert De Niro was in the dressing room. He just saw the show. He's waiting for you. Oh, fuck In the room in the dressing. He's waiting in your dressing room as soon as I got off stage They said he he left he left right when I started clapping and snuck in and got into my dressing room And I said I said De Niro was in the dressing room. He said, yeah
Starting point is 00:30:20 Have him thrown out I gotta decompress so I walk in I walk in I walk in the dressing room. He's sitting in the corner And he goes, you know the way he does it and he goes, um That's the fucking That's the greatest one man show I ever saw he goes. That's a movie. You did a movie. I go. Yeah, he goes How'd you do that? You know, he was really very nice. So he goes Listen, I'll tell you what I want to do. This is that fucking nuts. I was That's a million
Starting point is 00:30:51 I said, I said, I know what you're going to say I said, but I just want to know he goes, I know what you're going to say No, I know I know do you know Just sit on for 45 minutes. I'll tell you No, I know what you know. No, no, no. No, you fucking tell me He goes, look chance if you sell it, they're going to come to me anyway He goes and I know you don't want to sell crazy. Yeah
Starting point is 00:31:13 So he says but If you he goes you play he goes you'll be great as sonny, right and you write it because it's your life It'll be honest He goes, I'll play your father And I'll direct it and we'll go partners and if you shake my hands, that's the way it'll be I shook his hand That's how it happened. If you shake my hand, that's the way it'll be man. That's some cold shit right there That's fantastic. Yeah, that's and that's what happened
Starting point is 00:31:39 So that's all the problems of like saying that they needed to have like a star attached to it to sell He was playing my father. Yeah, he said I'll play your father you play sonny and I'll direct it So there was the star power right now, then he can go like this is what we're doing now. Yeah, wow And as soon as he he came on board and signed the studio went jazz is going to be great Chats I wanted you for this the whole time. It'll be better. It'll be honest Was it not the same? Was it the same studio? Was it the same studio that you had the meeting with a million dollars different studio? Yeah Holy fuck, you imagine that
Starting point is 00:32:14 Dude, it's insane dude. I was I was I was nervous that whole entire time I know it worked out well, and I'm like I'm still like oh what happened This is after now. This is after I got a deal right one of the studio guy heads come over he goes But it'd be great with you. This is one of the guys, right? Listen. See, I'm a I've been in Hollywood for 40 years He goes, you know why I love your writing chance he goes He's going like this He's putting it in my face like he goes your writing. It's this it's I go
Starting point is 00:32:42 I'm sitting there trying to keep a straight face. I want to tell the guy to go fuck He goes, you know what this is jazz. It's dirt. He goes your writing is full of dirt. It's real He goes, it's not like he goes. You ever see a souffle? It looks beautiful. You open it up Get a fork put a hole in it got nothing inside And I'm saying myself Your writing is great. I'm saying myself Okay, yeah, I appreciate that Meanwhile until the narrow came there was no fucking way. I was doing this, you know, I mean sooner or later
Starting point is 00:33:16 I think something would have happened because I wouldn't sell it Wow, that's that's uh, you know, that was the deal man. That's insane. That's a wild fucking story I know and and like you said you weren't y'all. I mean you were you were 39 39 39 to Peterson 39 years old no money in the bank. No health insurance nothing Nothing But I said fuck it. So what you what year exactly was that in 1989? So this is 89 89 so then the movies the movies shot and what you shot at Shot it in 93. I had a wait. We had a wait
Starting point is 00:33:48 Well, I came to new york then in 90 to do the play again in york and it was a big hit here to do it on broadway No off-roadway. The first time was off-road. Okay, and uh, bob just said look I want to do it, but I have these movies lined up, you know, you get the narrow. That's the only death and you got to wait You know, he's not going from job to job This is 1989 that you had that you had this encounter with deniro 1989 So goodfellas still hasn't even come out yet. No goodfellas hasn't come out yet. Holy shit. Nothing I got these other couple of things I got to do. Yeah So goodfellas and it was a whole bunch of things you had to do
Starting point is 00:34:23 But he said I give you my word. We're doing this. So I just did other things, you know You know, I did osco with saloon and I kept doing some I didn't I got a mini series You know, it was good, but But then if the fucking bronx tail hit, I mean that's a fucking game changes now Brox tail bam fucking explodes Usual suspects next Academy award nomination bull. So that's what I'm saying. I've been on a fucking I've been like I've been in the zone for 30 years
Starting point is 00:34:54 You know what I'm saying? So that was like my big break. It was crazy. That's that's the thing that I wanted to say was nuts So 93 the bronx that comes out less than two years later academy award nominated. Right. It's fucking insane insane Crazy, it's not wild fucking story inspiring story Tell Swiftie whatever his name is the fucking break a hike. Yeah, right. Well, he died not too laugh at that I never got a chance to say thank you You know, you know, no, but he you know, he was an asshole. I have to say He was nasty and he was an asshole and he he got me fine
Starting point is 00:35:32 But you know what? It was the best thing that ever happened Yeah, is there any celebrities that you had the you know when you were working that you had like straighten out or Or you know, not let him in or anything like that. Were they acting like assholes? Yeah, but I don't yeah Okay, there was The fuck there was a celebrity, I'll tell you the story Yeah, yeah, I didn't think he was gonna start saying names But I will tell you the story I won't tell you who was there was a thing where the sky was on Broadway very famous actor
Starting point is 00:36:01 And I'm working the door in 1982 And he comes over to me and he and it's really cool I had this big Kamali coat on with a scarf and I'm standing there like this, you know And he starts yelling at the fucking I think he was like, I don't want to say he was like coped up. Yeah drunk something And he starts yelling at the door man. It was a really sweet guy, you know nice guy And he starts yelling at him fucking put his finger in his face And I said hey, hey, take it easy and he said and who the fuck you think you are with your scarf and your coat I said, who am I trying to guess who?
Starting point is 00:36:35 I grab him by the fucking collar. I put him up. I said, I'm gonna dent your fucking chest Two bounces And they dragged me to help me and they said, you know who that is and I went, oh shit And yeah, then they straightened it up. She has not good with faces and names But then Five years later I'm at a big event in a tuxedo and who fucking sits right next to me He does he does he recognize probably not. Yeah. No, I never said a word who was on the moon at that time
Starting point is 00:37:08 Imagine that I told my wife. She goes don't say a word I said, oh, he doesn't know I said first of all, he was so fucking. Yeah, that wasn't probably if he's that if he's doing that That doesn't happen just one time to guys. I realize I shouldn't say that story if I'm not gonna say who it was Yeah, don't matter. I'm not gonna say who is but that's yeah, I should have said that I just wanted to hear a story about you smacking somebody around That's all you cared about. Let me tell you I had a fucking story. I could tell you my bounce of stories It's a quarter of four, right?
Starting point is 00:37:36 I'm there all of a sudden I wish we closed it four o'clock, but this is the this is the limelight. This is this is this is This is the height of it. This is the height. This is the eight. This is like that's the height of clock. It was studio 54 limelight. Yeah. Yeah, so I'm there and also it's a quarter of four. It's 20 dollars to get in So Now I gotta I gotta be politically corrected here these two little people. Okay, come the little people. Yeah, you know Do they it's an incorrect say midget. I guess it is they're little yeah, I think little people They like little people. So they're very they were nice. They come up She has a gown on and he's got like a tuxa
Starting point is 00:38:13 And they come walking over to me and you know, I'm cool, you know any guy goes Two, please. How much is it? I go I said, you know what it's It's quarter to four. I said we're not letting anybody in. Yeah, we're closed. I said there's no sense to let you Are you he goes are you racist? Are you a prejudice against little people? You're embarrassed that we and he starts fucking yelling at me And I'm saying no, so you're wrong. I'm six for for fucking four I said, no, you're wrong. I said it's just that it's a quarter to four. We're not letting anybody in
Starting point is 00:38:45 We're not letting anybody in. I don't want you to pay 20 dollars in 10 minutes. I don't we're closing 10 50 minutes I don't I'll kick your fucking ass. I said what? I wanted to pick him up like a small dean So I said, you know what fine I said, okay, you got your way charge them hair price. Yeah, I just meant charge them hair price Yeah, he thought I took it as an insult. He took it because we're small charge us hair He goes, you're making because all the bouncers started laughing when I said that You're making fun of us. Charge me hair price. I'm a man. I'm like, holy
Starting point is 00:39:22 No, I was trying to give you a break a price. I'm trying to give him a break. Now I'm saying to myself I'm gonna lose lose. Yeah, if I kick his ass That's bad. He kicks your ass. It's even worse. He kicks my ass We're really in trouble. You're in bad shape. Bobby's out if you get your ass kicked. If he bitches me out, I'm in trouble So I just shut my mouth and they walked out. Oh, that's great. Holy shit. All right. All right, let's switch gears Let's get into some questions. Let's play some are you garbage? All right, so we're gonna ask you a series of questions to determine whether you're trashy or not We know you're not gonna be yeah, I think I mean this guy's all class all class. All right, go ahead
Starting point is 00:39:58 Um, you want to take take the lead there big guy? Uh, yeah, so we're gonna kind of we're gonna kind of start with You know with now where you're living now in a situation. Yes, what's the name of the grocery store that you go to? Did I go to now? Yeah, or do you go to the grocery store? Uh, yeah, it's uh, I go to this place called Uh, Bedford gourmet. Oh, that's fucking nice. I've never heard of it, but it sounds fucking classy That ain't a discount place. I'll tell you that Oh god, no You said that was like a hideout or something like that. No, when you go to you gotta get a co-signer I can smell the bread from here. Yeah, that's a classy play. That sounds right. Yeah, these are the things we're curious about
Starting point is 00:40:38 I go there and I go to graffitis. You do. So you you go yourself. What's it? Well, yeah Normally who would go my wife goes or you know Somebody But I could see you at a graffitis. No question. No question. Yes Yelling at the bag boy or something. I said the eggs on the top All right Can't be um, all right at your house now currently did you do you guys wear your shoes in the house? Oh
Starting point is 00:41:09 Wow, I I don't No, we Some some my wife does I don't I like to take my shoes. Yeah. Yeah. That's the way to do it Is it a rule like if we came to the house? No, you can leave your shoes on. I don't like I don't like that You got to take your shoes off. I don't like telling people that. Yeah, there's a nice rug outside. You wipe it. It is fine Yeah, yeah Well, you take your shoes off if you go to someone else's house if you go for dinner and they're like, hey, we're a shoes All family are you going? What the fuck? I I I take it. Well, if I'm having dinner at the house, probably I'm never gonna be there again
Starting point is 00:41:40 I'll do it that one. Yeah, that one time. I'll appease you this time. I'll appease you this time You know, I'll do that one time. So yeah, I try to be nice about that Uh, where do you get your haircut now? At home. They do it at the house. They come to the house That's the classiest way. Oh, it's class right now. What do you tip on a haircut? Well, she comes I just give her she just give her whatever it's hers. Yeah, you know, she just charges me It's like a private thing. She comes to the salon comes to my house and I pay and she gets paid very well very well Because when she cuts my hair she does my wife everybody gets the whole
Starting point is 00:42:14 If my son is home, he'll get a haircut. I got you. That's the classiest answer. We've gotten so far That's filling it in the house by far and away. I have never I have never been to a bar, but probably Where people are no about 30 years Always they come to the house always come to the house. See we got to get on that. That's we got to get somebody coming here Oh, that'd be nice. Yeah, come in here. Yeah, we could do that. We could do that Yeah, you could do that, man. Are you a toaster family or a toaster oven family? Do you have a toaster oven or a toaster in the house? We have both. You have both pretty good This guy's all glass. I'm telling you keep the toaster out or do you put it away after you get the toaster is out toasters out
Starting point is 00:42:54 No, when you say the toaster oven, no, we have a confection oven, which is a microwave oven, which is on top. Oh, yeah I don't even know what that is. Yeah, it's classy. It's you you can't afford it. Let's leave it You don't have to worry about that until we make some more money. What's the oven? Is it a viking? Yes, it is. Yes. How about the fridge sub-z? Yes. Holy stainless steel. Yes. Oh stainless steel Yes, no, it's aluminum siding God damn it kippy Sub-z and viking. Yeah, we're doing we're sitting here with jazz guys, but let me let me be clear. I didn't grow up with it We know. Yeah. No, we know. We know that's why we love it. That's why yeah, yeah, 32 one bedroom in fucking LA
Starting point is 00:43:37 Driving the fucking there's 32 Honda. We know that's also what we celebrate when we do have people on are making money It's a struggle so long. Yes. Now you get to reap the benefits of working, you know for 34 struggling. Yeah, we're not the irs Yeah Yeah, I got an oven. I'm not looking for receipts. Chad. Oh, yeah, I got an oven. It's not that expensive It's in the driveway. It's weird. I'm hoping things turn around. Oh, that's fantastic. What about in the garage in the garage Do you have a refrigerator in that garage? Yes. Yeah, you do, huh? Yes And inside you got sodas and all that stuff. Yes big thing on the podcast is the garage garage for a big garage fridge Big garage for popsicles for the kids beer soda sure, but I also have a like a walk out like a big fridge for other things
Starting point is 00:44:26 Yeah No, I like I'm one of those prepper I like to have like this big fridge with all food in it and you can walk you got a walk Okay, wait, did you say you're a prepper like a doomsday prepper? No, no, no, I just like to have food ready to go ready to go Wow, really? Yeah, it's pretty good. Yeah, water food everything. I like it. Yeah That's really. Yeah. Listen when the pandemic you couldn't go to store in the grocery store. Yeah, you were ready Fucking chads is doing meatballs Guys, we're good. He's fucked up the grill. I'm gonna buy people over for fucking dinner
Starting point is 00:45:02 Toilet paper really check this out Oh, you got it. Oh, yeah Really? Yeah That guy does it right man. Oh, yeah Stocked up and ready to go. How long could you last in your place? If everything shut down You're cruising for what months a year years mean as far as food and water is everything like that A long time. Yeah, it's pretty good. Yeah, I would say a long time
Starting point is 00:45:27 I even have I have my own I have my own power to my own generator if something goes wrong. I saw the grid. I love it If something goes wrong that I could I mean as long if I could fill it up again I can go a month without any power really something goes wrong. I got about 38 minutes And I'm fucking dead If I can't find the cvs to get my next exam, I'm in trouble I need an aspirin. Hey, you know, but I'm super fanatical with that. I love it. Yeah Now, where does that come from? I don't know my dad was very ocd and he was like always be prepared Always be prepared about that. He kind of put it in my head, you know
Starting point is 00:46:03 Whenever I drive to a place as soon as I get there, I fill it up the car Really? Yeah Just in case you get hemmed up in a bad situation, you should get moving you can get moving You know what? I've done that and my dad gave me that advice and it saved me two or three times Really two or three times where I got somewhere and there was like an LA an earthquake Uh, you know one of those earthquakes sandy where you go. Oh, everybody's at the pump lines. You just go fuck me I'm out Dean Martin played on the radio
Starting point is 00:46:38 See you later losers Yeah, and my son my son is like me because he looked at me. He goes you were right dad. I said, all right That's why I got to get that's why I got to guess. So I mean say like, okay So like let's say right now you drove down to Atlantic City. You drive down. Let me see the first thing you're doing It's a refill off the car. Well, I tell the driver to do that. Yeah Got the driver. You have a daily driver or for like, no, I I have him whenever I want. Yeah Daily, yeah, I would say do you still drive though. Do you like to drive? I like to drive So if you go to graffitis, you might hop in the car. Oh, yeah, if I go to graffitis, I drive
Starting point is 00:47:10 No, if I come to the city, he drove you down today. He drove me down today. He's waiting outside. Yes That's fucking classy Yeah, but if I if I go to graffitis, I go myself. Yeah, I like doing that That's he just a driver or a little bit more He's a little more. Yeah, so he come up here and smack us around or something. No, I like to I hire I have two guys that work for me. They're ex-policemen retired. Nice. They got steel on them is what he's trying to say I said they got some steel on them. That was a nice way to say it They can regulate problems if need be jazz ain't rolling around with two goons
Starting point is 00:47:44 These are these are these come around with one of my old friends that I got to protect him They have certain negotiating skills They're retired policemen and they're terrific. Yeah, that's the way to do that's a good situation Would you take them with you? Whenever like are they downstairs now? He's downstairs right now. Holy Toby do something stupid so you gotta get working Fucking have you tuned me up a bit Oh
Starting point is 00:48:15 Now we're getting Guys all class I love you're you're breaking. I mean like we had Chrissy D. Oh Chrissy D. He's an animal He's a nice kid. It was classy, but I mean, he's yeah, you see the house he rented in the la. I'm believable It's a fucking Hearst castle. I know he's new money. He's new money. Chrissy. It's incredible. Yeah. Yeah, it's great Now is that something you'd be yelling at him for or you would be like live it up and enjoy yourself I think he's a smart guy, but I just always said, you know Always try to live a little on the amoeba. Yeah, of course. We're starting to make a couple of bucks And that's where we're having to readjust from the struggling comments to being like, oh, okay
Starting point is 00:48:50 But just yeah, you see you could buy things when you start making money But it's to keep it and maintain it. That's the problem. Yeah. Yeah, buying it is not a problem You know, it's keeping it smart. It's keeping it. It's like buying a horse and then it's like 30 grand defeated every year Did you have exactly did you have that? I know it was like a lot of small moves and like even like Bronx tell you were building up to it over over like four five or six years from 89 to when it when it came out Did you have one big check that you splurged on something? Was it was there like what was the first big buy? Yeah I could you want me to tell you the story about that? Right, we do. Okay. I'm waiting for that. I make the deal with the narrow the deal the deal's done, right?
Starting point is 00:49:30 I'm sitting in my apartment now Uh, I got some money. I got a few dollars. Can we ask what that number was like from the million check Yeah, well, what so what was the deal with the narrow? Were you guys going to split the back end? No, I I I could tell you what I got a I got paid a million and a half dollars For the to write it and everything nice So you got over you got you got over what I wanted and to fucking be Taz is playing fucking chess over here. What did that do to your head? Look, it's because of the narrow. I mean, I I owe bob so much and with best friends and
Starting point is 00:50:03 He's the one of the course. I know bobby real well It's real friends calling bobby friends calling friends his real friends calling bobby family calls him robbit Bullshit is calling bobby. Yeah, okay, so um I'm sitting there my apartment. I got a better apartment. It wasn't great, but it was better And I'm I'm on laurel canyon and I'm with my friend Dayton Callie. He's a wonderful actor Really a great actor and he's been on many shows if you see his face, you know, he is He's been on deadwood and a bunch of shows and it's me and him. We're working on a scene for the theater where I'm from Oh, the acting place where I developed the Bronx tail
Starting point is 00:50:41 We're going back and forth sitting on it. Now. I knew the deal was closed. I'm waiting for the check, right? I get a knock on the door The guy goes, uh, how you doing check? He's he worked the way mars. He goes he goes you want to sign this? I said, oh so I think it's Something I have to sign for I don't know what I have no idea because they didn't say the check's coming right they didn't say nothing to me so This fucking story guys
Starting point is 00:51:10 I'm telling you. I'm writing my I'm this is gonna be I'm writing a movie about how this whole thing happened Oh, I can't I can that I cannot wait. I go like this. I go here Dayton. So yeah, we'll get that other scene together and we go I go like this. I go start pulling it back and shit. What the fuck I got no I got a few dollars now. Maybe maybe I got three or four thousand in the bank now Don't good. Maybe so yeah, it's great for an act like a working actor. Yeah, which I got luck Which he lent to me pedagation like let me so i'm looking at the thing I go I go hey dane I just got a check for $50,000. He goes
Starting point is 00:51:46 $50,000 he goes that's impossible Wait, I said, I don't know. Maybe it's a payment for the Bronx tail. He stands there. Let me see that he stands up He leans over my shoulder My eyes are like crushed. I can't see he goes He goes chaz that's $500,000 So I go like this He says that's $500,000 your brain can't process the zeros. That's never seen it. I could process this sure. So I go like this I go
Starting point is 00:52:17 I sit down I sit down in the autumn and he sits down on the couch just like that And we don't say a fucking word for three minutes not one word man. I'm like this And tia start rolling down my fucking eyes Right and I get up and I go oh shit $500,000 Fuck So I go dating
Starting point is 00:52:43 So I take a few deep bra. I'm getting nervous. It's not good thinking about I take a few deep breaths and I go You know what dain the first thing I'm going to buy with this fucking money I said we're going To the fucking uh the name of the store. I wish I could remember the name. It was like a big department store I said because I saw my vacuum cleaner to pay my electric bill And it pissed me off and I never forgot that And I said I'm going to go there and I'm going to buy the best fucking vacuum cleaner they got So my friend dain goes hey chat, you know, just like neighborhood guys. Hey, I need one
Starting point is 00:53:17 Oh your mother yes, she's getting one you're getting you can when I'm about to tell you you can't make this shit up My mother and father if I'm lying to you If I'm exaggerating to you sure he goes I go come on. We go to this fucking store. I wish I could remember the name We walk in so I got a credit card. So I go shoot me sir I want the best vacuum cleaners you have and he goes my friend goes they got suits on My friend goes two of them Like so we go
Starting point is 00:53:46 We go Guy goes like this. He's he's showing us the best. I go. Excuse me. You know what I said, is this the best he goes Well, there's enough. There's another one. He goes. He goes. That's professional. You don't need it. I said, listen to me It's my fucking money. I want the best one. Yeah, and he goes my friend dain's going didn't you hear what the man said? So we get we get the two fucking vacuum cleaners we buy them Right, so as we're waiting for them as we're waiting for them. I got the check fold it up in my fucking pocket As we're waiting for them. I hear I hear glass breaking
Starting point is 00:54:25 I said, what the fuck? So I go dain. What is that? I hear I hear people yelling So I go leaning. Oh, I go I go to the end of the aisle and I lean over and I look There's two guys with ski masks on with hammers and they're breaking the glass taking the jewelry out And also as I turn around I go what the and the guy was With a gun he was watching over them turns to me and my friend dating goes eat the fucking floor motherfucker and I went And I lay on the floor. Yeah, yeah, fuck I lay on the floor. He lays on the floor everybody's laying on the floor and the bell is going off, right?
Starting point is 00:54:59 And I turn to date and I go dating I ain't fucking dying now Not now. Yeah, I just measures. I just got fucking I hundred thousand dollars. I just got a brand new vacuum and a brick, right? Two of them, right? Two of them. So I said come on So I said, let's get it. So we crawl around to the other side of the fucking aisle And because everybody was everybody was frozen. Yeah, they didn't move But I don't want to sound like a tough guy, but I've had guns pulled on me
Starting point is 00:55:28 So I'm like, I'm getting the fuck out of here because I am not going to be hostage Because I can see it now the bells are ringing the cops are on their way. Yeah, and they were rushing these guys I got I see these two old women They're standing there. I grabbed one. I go, dang get her and we kicked the fucking door open that rang bell too And we pulled out and me and him took off Damn and we had to go back to the fucking back Same day Did you went back?
Starting point is 00:55:56 Man, he's a vacuum cleaner and we have my back still have that fucking vacuum do you a lecture looks nuts I mean, I sold it that I bought it. No, sure. That's fantastic. So that was your first big thing was it was a vacuum cleaner If that ain't class, I don't know what yeah A lot of guys blow it on this and that no, no, no that I bought a new car And you saved two old ladies lives I saved a lot I bought a car that time was bought a brand new legend What was a legend a legend a legend a legend. Yeah, they don't make them. Yeah, it was uh, Acura acura legend. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Good car. I got you. Acura is a nice car
Starting point is 00:56:28 But a brand new acura legend Then I gave it to my father then I bought myself a really like the misades. Oh, bmw was first before the misage Yeah, class class move, man Um, all right. I got another one here if you're going out to uh, you're going to a friend's house for dinner, right? Yes, uh, you're taking a bottle of wine. How much you dropping on that bottle of wine? Oh, you going low ball like the $13 ball you go high. What are you doing? The minimum A minimum would be 50
Starting point is 00:56:57 On the top end would be 150 Nice Do you then how do you delineate who gets to 150 who gets to 50? Is it how close you are to them? Well, how I know when I go to their house what they're serving me sure like, you know, if I know I go You know, I go to Bob's house. It's yeah, you can't be getting a $50 bottle. Yeah, I'm getting I'm getting really good wine Yeah, okay Because just because he knows really good wine. He knows because he's a connoisseur of wine right one of my friends I go I'm still going to give him a good wine because he'll break my balls. Yeah. What the fuck is this?
Starting point is 00:57:26 Hey, got me Sutter home I invited you for the fucking wine You had one job You know the problem is there's good and bad the problem is and you guys you'll see You'll know you'll find out when you I don't know you probably get it now when you're all having dinner somewhere the restaurant The check comes. Well, this is another question. I wanted that. Oh, yeah, they just sit there Because they assume chairs Which I do. Yeah, and that's fine. Yeah, I don't mind that but you know say you're going out with another group
Starting point is 00:57:56 You know other successful actor friend. How do you chop it up? Then is there a conversation? Just someone just grab it or do you sit there and like I had No, we don't go Who ate the shrimp? He got so mad, but we don't do that No, we don't do that You find you buy you thought one of us one of us will pay Who ate the shrimp? I didn't have a cup. Okay
Starting point is 00:58:20 No, it's true. It's true. So one of you would pay rather than split it. Yeah, no, we wouldn't split it Yeah, we split it like imagine him and like it's like him and then you're out throwing up credit cards We would split it. Oh, that's so funny And I'd ask you about tipping but I know you're a good tipper because you were actually one of the last tables Oh, yeah, I ever waited on A couple years ago. Yes, it was you and your son and it was that yeah It was at a burger place in the west villa last his last day of work It was the last day that I was working there was the last time I ever waited tables
Starting point is 00:58:50 I always leave a good tip. You tip me very well. Yeah, so it's because I I look at and I put my son that I said That it means more to them than it does Few bucks. I I even think of that 10 that extra 20 whatever and normally I wouldn't really think that but since it was you I was like, I hope the god that he tips me well just because everything that I believe in him Would then come true and it and and you did you came through? Yes. I also finished your burger. I didn't want to tell you You had like a bacon blue cheese burger and you cut it in half and didn't finish it So I ate the rest of it. I figured hey, this is as good as it's gonna get
Starting point is 00:59:30 I didn't know I'd be interviewing him in two years Everything you do in your life fully does the opposite. Yeah, except for tipping. I'm a good tipper Good, you gotta be Um, what kind of cologne do you like to wear? Um I I'm trying to think of the cologne that I wear now. Um, I like to try different colognes I don't uh, I forgot the name of it. Damn it. I just can't think of the name What about back in the day? Were you ever like a brute old spice kind of guy English leather? Never even the way he said no he was again
Starting point is 01:00:01 Can you what about canoe? No canoe canoe was big. No, it was it was big. I just didn't like uh I like the more of a subtle stuff, you know the more of designer stuff like You know the Calvin Klein or This guy's close. Yeah, um at home. Do you keep your butter on the counter or in the fridge in the fridge? I'm sorry There's one in the one in the fridge and one in the counter because some people like it smooth My wife keeps it. There's two. I mean come on. Do you think he's not these he's got both for everybody guys cover in his I just realized that my wife keeps it out and I keep it in I need you to know that you've made everyone else
Starting point is 01:00:39 We've had some of the biggest comedians in the world on the show. You've made them all look homeless Yeah, hey Well, that's also I mean obviously it's it's an Italian thing too. Italians are very put together Pride of it's like a very everything's very calculated very very meticulous And I and I my wife is like really everything has to be like beautiful Yeah, like if you if you something if we have a guest over the house the next day you wake up And you come down in the kitchen. You'll think it's the four seasons Oh, really pancakes and french toast and jam and these beautiful jars and she does it nice, huh?
Starting point is 01:01:14 She does it right. That's awesome. You know, she does it right now This might be a silly question, but do you have a guy right now to make custom suits for you? Are you a custom suit guy? Yeah, how many what's the ballpark number on suits you think you got but but there's a better question to that Go ahead. Ask me how many suits I have how many? Probably 60 Okay, but ask me how many I paid for how many did you pay for two? Why?
Starting point is 01:01:42 Because you go to places and they want you to wear. Yeah, famously. Yeah, like yeah here So I can't say that I that I might have paid two or three. I might have paid for them myself two or three Yeah, but most of them I have all the clothes and the suits from all of my movies Really everything everything that you said something you put in the contract you just kind of last day Contract because they they don't want it anymore. Yeah, they got hip to it Yeah, because I I tried to steal a jack. I was on Gotham once I tried to steal a jacket I didn't even make it off the driveway. They were all over me. I have I have huge cedar closet
Starting point is 01:02:17 uh and I have From bronx tail The bronx tail ask them usual suspects all sealed in plastic with the title and name on it Fantastic sunny suits for something else. Yeah, that was like some that was fucking shoes. Hi hats I learned that from from bob. He's the one who taught me to take the wardrobe Take the wardrobe really because he just sold his word. I think he just gave it to a museum in Dallas
Starting point is 01:02:47 Oh, yeah, but it's it's worth, you know, for my children. It's a legacy. Yeah, of course. Fuck George wrote the suit sold for half a million dollars The white suit from tiny. Yeah. Okay Half a million dollars That's pretty good. What could you sell your suit for you think? Half a ham sandwich No mustard. How do you feel about Hawaiian pizza? No
Starting point is 01:03:15 No When was the last time you were at apple bees at tji fridays or an olive garden? Yeah, I was gonna ask you Have you ever eaten an olive garden? I'm trying to think of maybe years ago. No, no I think it would be so funny if you went like denny or you were like all just popped into an olive garden one night I don't know how staunch you are with this, but is there any circumstance At the pulmonary household that there would be a jar of spaghetti sauce
Starting point is 01:03:48 A jar of sauce a jar of sauce like if you're making pasta I'm trying to think of my wife if I had something in a pinch You've got a a garage full of doomsday preference. Yeah, no way. There's I have cases of San Marzano tomatoes, of course Oh, no, no, I want you to understand that I was saying not that not that it's crazy that you don't have it Yeah, it's so awesome that you have everything to make it to make actual never have the jar No, I have we have cases of the of the tomatoes
Starting point is 01:04:20 And I have a guy who has fresh tomatoes and gets it and then we have jars sealed of that. Yeah So I can go either way with the cans or have that and just use that So there's not going to be a bottle of classical in the pantry No, pretty good. No, I love it. Um All right, this is what this is what we did with Chrissy D. Uh, you're you're going as a guest to a wedding. What are you dropping at the wedding? Not like someone that's close but not close, you know, I'm dropping Yeah, yeah, you got it, right? You got it. Yeah, a grand. What are you talking? Uh, if it's a friend
Starting point is 01:05:00 Yeah, friend's kid. Let's say a grand a grand cash. Not a check not cash. No a cash cash hundreds always Oh I'm living out some like weird part of my fantasy from my childhood Just with the answers to the question the way I literally just saw my head jazz commentary just looked at phone and said always hundreds You know, you go to a wedding. They invite you. What do you even do? Let's give a hundred Yeah, I get it. Of course. It's very expensive to get married. I know. Yeah And you know what if my friend's son or daughter, you know, yeah, yeah, absolutely fucking class act man classy all the way
Starting point is 01:05:40 Here's one good you go to the beach I know what Chrissy kept saying to me you're gonna love these guys. You're gonna love the show Good you go to the beach, right? Uh, are you uh, sitting close to the to the water guy or are you sitting close to the to the dunes guy or somewhere in the middle There is it. There is a classy and a trashy answer. I just want to see I'm not by the water. I can tell you that I'm not by the water. That's it. I'm back Where usually I try to get a house
Starting point is 01:06:14 To rent the house. That's right by the water. So if I feel like sitting on my deck And my kids and my wife go to the water they can't and something but then they'll come back and they'll just stay on the deck Nice now the trashy version is you go close to the shoreline to the water your garbage Yeah, that they're always the garbage people you're half in the water Oh Trash you sit back on the beach like a job. You sit back on the beach like a gentleman. That's coming in the drop of hot dogs Oh, they're running Yeah, one of them's got shoes on now. Well, you guys
Starting point is 01:06:51 You guys did a fucking study on this. Oh, we're trash. We know what we know. Well, we know our trash Well, you will you go local for vacation sometimes or is it always going to be like South to France or something like that. Like will you go down to the jersey shore or anything? I've rented houses on the jersey street. Yes. Yes. I've rented houses. Uh, Where do you go on the jersey shore? Like, you know, love ladies, um And ain't gonna be wild with bozos You can rent you can rent we need to go to the hamptons. Yeah, oh we go to the jersey shore, which is uh, Long Beach Island Yeah, lbi very classy very nice
Starting point is 01:07:27 And we we rent the house, uh You know, right by the ward. It's beautiful. Yeah, that's really sure. It's very underrated jersey shows very underrated. It's very beautiful Yeah, absolutely very nice I like him hamptons class very class. Yeah, the hamptons is great too. Yeah Um, have you ever been on a cruise? Never And i've been offered to go on cruises. I'm sure for free. Yeah, I'm sure for free And I can stay at the captain's table and eat it. I can't go. I just You cannot trap me there like that. I don't you know
Starting point is 01:08:03 And you gotta come and go if the beginning of the pandemic didn't teach anybody anything Don't ever go on a cruise. I just can't be locked into this. This is it. You're on you're not getting off Yeah, no, it's not for me. Sorry. If somebody has a cold everybody gets it. Yeah, and you're quarantined on that thing It's not for me. I can't do it. No never cruise never. Do you fall asleep watching tv? uh Sometimes I do okay. Do you sleep with a fan next to the bed on you? No, okay Fair enough Let's see another big one on the show, uh, is do you brush your teeth in the shower?
Starting point is 01:08:42 No, no, yeah I don't know. He kind of paused on it. No, I'm trying. I'm thinking I'm trying to make sure if I ever did that No, no, I'm not gonna get to come on. Chaz ain't brushing his teeth in the shower I'm not gonna brush my teeth in the shower. Do you drink the coffee in the hotel room the little coffee maker? Will you make that? I don't drink coffee. Okay What's your cocktail of choice the wine guy wine wine red white? What do you both both? Both yes dependent on the mood and the meal, baby. Did you ever collect any of the following? Swords
Starting point is 01:09:14 What's wards was like a sword? Oh sword. Yeah, you really pronounce it. I'll be with that Swords I was like, what the fuck Collected swords, num chucks. No, Chinese stars. No, what about beanie babies? No, okay What the fuck you're gonna sold us like that. I just wanted to be sure I'm sorry. She's gonna get fucking pissed on Get fucking steve out of that truck bring them guys. We're going great. I got a cool bobby lamb chops That's his name bobby lamb chop. That's the best name in the world. That's so good bobby lamb chop
Starting point is 01:09:55 It's intimidating but also he might be a sweet guy When you get to know him, he's a real sweet guy. Yeah, he's not bashing your brains into the sidewalk Uh, man, I think I only got one more that I want to reserve for you Which is the dinner the dinner. Yeah, what do you drink with the what? Oh Growing up or now Growing up or no or now Do you ever have milk with dinner? Never never never not even growing up Never nice plate. Nice plate of lasagna. Have a nice glass of milk. Never
Starting point is 01:10:27 Really I mean people actually do that some Italians do a lot of it. They're Italians do it. Yeah He was there's they did it a lot in the Sopranos He would come home and open up a thing and he had a big glass of milk and he'd be eating like cold lasagna or whatever I don't get it. I well half the population drinks milk with dinner. It's wild. I'm sorry. I I've Never yeah, that's crazy. Your kids. I assume not either. Never. Never not milk Not milk. No, man All right, the last question. Yeah, is it okay to get a toothpick when you're walking out of the restaurant?
Starting point is 01:11:05 I I don't do that. No, no, I I don't say it's bad. Yeah, you just not it. Yeah, I'm just not it to Picking my teeth. Yeah in public in public. Yeah, this guy's this is books clothes You get 100 class class even the way he poured the Pellegrino is classic. I saw we apologize for the solo cups We wanted to get something we got to keep it on brand a little bit though You got you got the Pellegrino out of a plastic cup. Could have a water for the glass Listen, most people don't even get a water You've got a Pellegrino. I was like 350 I'm sending Chrissy D a receipt for that gang. What an absolute unbelievable episode
Starting point is 01:11:47 Chas palmetary. Thank you so much. Is there anything you want the folks out there to know that you have coming up other than Yeah, well, I want to make sure that people go to my new podcast Chas palmetary show. It's on Spotify on youtube. Just fantastic fantastic show. Great. Thank you very much I I talk about acting writing directing. It's like a master class. That's funny with funny stories And I talk about neighborhood logic and that's really the big thing is that Godfather Harlem premieres April 18th And if people shouldn't you want to see my one-man show they can go on chas palmetary dot net And my host schedule for this year and next year the touring where I will be
Starting point is 01:12:25 And they can go to my line store and get anything all those like old Posts that I had from my original Bronx Tales show if they want to purchase that fantastic. Yeah, absolutely unbelievable. Thank you so much Kippy, what do you got for them? Just as always, please make sure you're right with you subscribe on itunes Subscribe on youtube for full video and then patreon.com and i'm at kevin ryan comedy on all social media Absolutely fantastic episode guys. Thank you so much. We love you and we'll see you next week. Peace

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