Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Colum Tyrrell Returns!

Episode Date: March 17, 2022

Kippy and Foley are joined by old pal Colum Tyrrell! It's a fun one. Love youse guys.  Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage https://www.BetterHelp.com/GARBAGE https://www.athleticgreens.com/GARBAGE https://www.Babbel.com Promo Code: Garbage https://www.LadderLife.com/GARBAGE Subscribe on iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/are-you-garbage-comedy-podcast/id1499140700 Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test.

Are you garbage if your tux has a stain on it and you wear it anyway? Then when you get to the wedding you immediately spill something on yourself in front of a crowd to make it look like it happened there so everybody is not the wise. I respect the f**king move. What are you doing off? He gets there so he'll get me meatballs there. Gang get your tickets for all the cities on the State Trashy Tour at rUgarbage.com.

Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Gobbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and age foley Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcasts This is are you garbage. Oh, yeah, so I little show we sit down with your favorite comedians And we find that I think you're to be classy. Yeah, they're just a big old piece of trash Trash

I'm your host H. Fully coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Tuddy's in the new edition She's upstairs with a nice Shepherd's pie in the oven and on over our special gas. She also hid this over where my co-host is coming at you from right next to me He is the CEO of our you garbage. He's assaulting the suburbs, baby Oh, baby giving up for KJ Kevin James Ryan what up gang. Thanks for tuning in. As always, make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes. Yeah. Video available on YouTube as you know, those numbers are true to roof cooking. And obviously the greatest website all the time,

www.patrion.com slash are you garbage, you go over there and you get bonus content coming out the wazoo gang. It's all on there. Check it the frick out. Yes, sir. And having a nice quick shout out to our producer, extra in there, the old magic man makes us all look good works to ones the twos the

threes and the fours he crosses the tees and he dots the eyes give it up for T-bone McScruffins towing McBull in everybody. Hey what up dude. What up pal? Nothing feeling like I just found a four leaf clover in the field you know. This one's angry. This one's got a bit of an attic problem. He doesn't have a pot of gold, he has a pot of shut the fuck up. I got a knuckle sandwich for you. What the fuck? Gang the long hair ain't lying, because we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean incredibly special guests back with us again today.

First time here in the new edition here at Toadies. You know him, you love him, he's going to be at Helium Comedy Club. September 20th, let's go fucking show up and see the kid And he's also got a brand new special out right now 30 minutes of column turtle give it up for column turtle everybody Thanks guys Lean into those Philly dates with the English Pretty sure that's a girl's jersey I've just I've supported

I've been a Philly fans so long I've had this since I was a young boy Man, he can pander. I love the Eagles hit those home runs Oh Jaylen hurts a three-pointer You look like a red shirt freshman right now nice. No, I think I look good. This is solid. You know, no, sure looks good Where did you get that? You look like the third drink quarterback. He looks like the water boy September 20th, healing college fill it out to you all jokes aside tickets I liked. What can I say I love hockey I don't know.

Skit flyers whatever you guys are. I just picture you with a closet full of jerseys for different sake. Hey you're just wherever these shoes are. I wish Boisey out of team. I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just...

I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm just... I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I promotion has a business man myself. This is all time. Ooh, that's some good wooder. Oh. Oh, yeah.

You have a problem with this. You can see me. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that.

I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you that it a look if you're at home. Thank you. Ciao right now. It's out right now. I'm a YouTube page. He's one of the best in the city. He's, you know, he's a little rough and tumble, but it's good. He's a little fucking little edgy.

I guess. I guess. I said, I'm a dirty little edge lord. Yeah. Yeah. It's great though, man. Congratulations. Showed up in a bathing suit in a jersey. Yeah. I've gone numb because it caused the lead up to the special. You're just watching back the edits so often that it's almost like It's like when you repeat a word over and over and over again loses all mean It's like my face is sort of just become like I'm like who is this? Yeah, I don't when I see myself. I'm like who is this fucking? Did you hate yourself? Yeah, of course. Yeah, what I'm not alike myself for the first time in my life I'm watching my special that's that really turn it on in your 30. That's the moment. What I watch my okay special That's that really turn it on in your 30. That's that's the moment when I watch my okay special

Practice himself well, baby. Now it was a lot of fun. Shout out to gas digit watch all the specials actually You know you know you know Lewis Dave Smith George Genson, which boss Kurt Mads girl and they're all part of a series of 30 minutes with gas digital So I'm happy it's out. No first one and that's hopefully hopefully makes me super famous. There you go Baby bag me to come on You'll be bumping cigarette. It's call it tea, dude. He's Oh, we got to do we got a kiss the ring Call it he called me. Oh, here's a question. Yeah, a lot of rings Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're popular with men in Ireland right no

Yeah, thank you War one dude. No, you know, he did. I did you have a face in the right way so that people knew you're ready to mingle He's hanging out at the docs trolling. I don't know if you notice, but it's actually a tuna boats to come in Yeah, oh I forgot about that he was dead set because I made fun of them for it Yeah, and he was dead. I was young. I was in love. Oh Now the narrative's really changed. Sure. Well, tough Irish guys wear it. That's not Irish guys wear it. Yeah, three three thing cluttering. Yeah. It comes with a track suit. Yeah, I thought they were only like a woman thing. I didn't know it was like a we're both in a relationship. Let's wear matching ring. Really? As far as my understanding is, because

also a lot of this Irish stuff isn't I know in my Culture it's like you come over here. It's American Irish. Yeah, yeah, there's no corn beef and cabbage Yeah, no there is yeah, there's definitely corn beef and cash. There is yeah, there's corn beef plenty alcoholism Oh, yeah, plenty of domestic violence. I can't cross the pond all of that stuff is that's genetic the other stuff the other stuff Excessory the other stuff is cultural that's it that's genetic the other stuff the other stuff accessory The other stuff is cultural that's like within the DNA is to be a booze bag But as far as I know you put the ring on yeah, and you you paint you pointed towards you if you're in if you're no Point it the hard goes towards you. I like guys Guilty it goes on your finger you close your fist. You should have an ass

Now it goes towards you if you're in a relationship and out and if you're looking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, you're looking. I'm much weird. We tried to do. When you break open your girl and go like this right and

put them, turn around. No, I tried there. I tried to pawn it. Oh, yeah. How much I need? What is a real eight box? They're like, aren't they like fake? I think I got 754.

I was in the throes of a drug addiction. And I was broken hearted. And all of you when you wore it, I tell you, but this is a year 12. This was, uh, I was in my 20s, on my early 20s. Oh, yeah, I thought they were popular. Yeah, there was, there was a couple of comments or people that wrote in with like, yeah, I also wore one, but I don't, you know, I honestly, but I'm also very bad at this stuff, but I never even,

I knew it until I moved to America. Really? That's not to say, because a lot of this stuff I got, we don't have that in our own, and then everyone else is like, yeah, we do yours and more on that. Yeah, yeah.

And never noticed anything. I have that at the same thing. If you got married, would you walk a rocker, would you rock a wedding band? Would you wear a wedding ring? Yeah, wedding ring. Oh, yeah, I think so, yeah. I always say, you can't be, doesn't wear a wedding. I don't wedding ring. Oh, yeah. You will? Yeah, I think so.

Yeah. Guy was say, he can't be doesn't wear a wedding ring. No, no. That's okay. All right. I don't know if you know of us. Kids on borrowed time. I mean, not after we all had to wait for a couple more hairs to fall out.

We can take your stuff and shoot it out. Hooker stole it. Hi, God. I got one more shot at losing these 20 pounds and see if that works out. If that don't work out, I'm putting one on. I never wore, I don't know. I forgot, we had the wedding, I forgot, we were so many things I forgot to get a ring. Because it's so not important to me.

Yeah. So I got one on Amazon. You got hers, right? Yeah, we got hers. I got one on Amazon for You got hers, right? Yeah, we got hers. I got one on Amazon for like eight bucks, just to have at the ceremony and that was a guy I'll get one later, but I can't, I don't know. I don't wear watches, I don't wear rings.

The rubber one seems like the little black rubber one. Yeah, a lot of people wear rubber ones because a lot of construction workers, because like it's something we'll get caught on it. Yeah, look, caught on it, or rip your finger off. But if you work in a kitchen, if you work in a kitchen, it ain't like that. You're not gonna realize it. Yeah, put on it or rip your finger off But if you work in a kitchen if you work in a kitchen and like that You know, I won't snuck into a music festival, right? Sure, okay?

Because and so what I did was I got someone else to rip off their hand band the wrist band from inside They brought out to me and I printed up a fake letter from my boss and said I was here yesterday I came home to do the night shift in the kitchen. I'm not allowed to have any to know my hands in the kitchen, so I had to put it off. And they're like, this is my boss that says the rules that in the kitchen. Signed columns, boss.

And then, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Put a little marinara sauce on it to make you look authentic. Great guy, character letter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He would dress like Chef Boyard, D. He would never sneak out of the huge, out of the big mustache. I was in the middle of the kitchen. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Crazy I can't believe it on a level did I was like man you must have a tough job. I walked in like Dude these guys are animals. I was like here's a ladder from There's a letter from my big boss. Yeah, I'm working guys like us

That's the best that's the best way did you ever need to sneak into someone say yeah, you your boss right letter from your boss Don't try that. Oh, that's never a thing. That's not going to work. What are you talking about? You wrote me a fake letter, so I get my first apartment. I did. He was also his little. That's that's standard practice. That's come on.

I'm trying to level the plane. You got to come on. Cut to an app. He fucking he's like, I don't know what it was right when he was guiding his own apartment. I'm like, you know, he's like, yeah, I need a letter for my employer. Stating I make this much money. I'm like, you know, he's like, yeah, I need a letter for my employer stating I make this much money. I'm like, dude, I'll make you the head of the fucking,

the head of podcasting. What are you talking about? I'll sign whatever. I'm like, send me what you need. You're gonna have to be Beatrix. I'm like, I'm like, I'm gonna make $18 million a year. I do, I love a fucking fake letter. Of course.

A fake letter and back in the day when you had to put three references, then you give your, you say, hey, listen. Your brother, your mom, your sister. Fuck yeah, dude. You better, you better. Yes, yes, yes. Always, man, always.

Yes, he worked for me for five years. He's a great guy. I did that shit all the time. I got caught by a landlord one time. When I was trying to get my, I was, I was living my buddy and I was trying to move out and get my own apartment by myself with, with me and my wife, my girlfriend, she was my now wife, I'm panicking.

I swear to God, I'm mad. No ring. No ring. That's in my head now, dude. She's like, I heard you, you know, so. I wish I get you a clot of ring. She makes me wear it. Oh, I'm gonna fucking nice.

Woo! Put that in her ear. He's been really asking me for something he really likes. But I had my roommate who owned the apartment right as my current landlord, which like, there was never any lead. I was just giving him like four, 500 bucks a month. But theoretically he was.

Theoretically he was, but he printed it up on like a letterhead and was like, you know, he's always paid his rent on time and all this time. And I sent it to my new potential landlord and he goes, what'd your buddy make this? I was like, nah, nah, nah, it's a real company. He's like, it's had like apartment 2B on it or whatever. There was no actual option.

I hadn't written on a pad. He snuffed it out right away. Yeah, have you ever been the reference for a job reference? Have you ever gotten the phone call? We were like, yeah, Toby worked for me for a long time. I never did. You gotten. Yeah, I've gotten that call for, yeah, buddy. Mine. I didn't, I wasn't the person's boss and he's like, hey, the fake call. Yeah, the fake call. Yeah, because they got fired for doing something stealing or whatever the fun it was. Hey, listen, I'm gonna give this people your number.

Fucking absolutely. That's an acting job to me. What are you doing? I'm doing Australian accent. Hello, mate. You're fucking absolutely. That's an acting job to me. What are you doing? You're like doing Australian accent. Hey, man, you're talking to a, you're yelling at a fake secretary. Lisa, hold my calls. I'm on with the general manager of Apple Bees. Yeah, and you're doing it on cell, cell, cell.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He worked with me and tried to chose for a while. It's pretty busy, doesn't it? Well, I think they're a little... Play like factory sound music. They're only legally allowed to ask if they did work for you and how long. Yeah, they can't be allowed to ask if they were a shitting people. Yeah, they fucking suck.

You're allowed to say they were... I never would have got another job if that was the case. Yeah. I know in Ireland there's a real, they say, would you rehire them? Wow. And that's how you know that. You know what I'm saying? That's what they would say. Damn now. I think that's pretty good though

That's fair I think would you rehire them? No because most of the time the ages are gonna be fuck no That's no some I thought you're a bad employee. Yeah, I'm yeah, you're shit together and start contributing also if you And hiring someone and then you ring their reference and then the reference gives them a bad reference You go this person. It's not even the bad reference. It's like you're too stupid to get a take to allow this to happen. You should have put somebody you was gonna give you a new truck. I don't mean someone who lies and gets their friend to do it. Yeah.

I'd rather have them than the moron who kids a hustler. Yes. Yeah. It's a real kid's a real scam artist who takes out on myself. Yeah. Absolutely. That's all right. We are planning one of the our next patreon goal at the moment is When we hit 12,500 fucking

Go back Collie. We're going back to old. He's never been never been what are some Things we should do or places we have to see we're always gonna hit the big ones. We're gonna do Dublin Dublin party go check out the pubs. See some, I guess go see some stuff, I guess, you know. Yeah, I guess. Now, Dublin, you know, Dublin's, I've spent time in Dublin. Dublin's a good, yeah.

It's a regular city. It's like a European city. So you just go see the, go to the pubs. All the old pubs that the ones you wanna go to, all the pubs that like, cause it, yeah it does pubs from the 1800s. Yeah. Are the beers cold over there? They serve it a warm. What's it deal cold cold cold? Yeah, and even Guinness is This is like some room or that Guinness is like some room temperature, but it's not never been a big Guinness guy No, it's different over there. It's unbelievable really. It's really is

Yeah, you have one and then like it's like you want to put cereal in it in the morning It's so good. Yeah, unbelievable when you go to try to do what you think you go to drink You think you're gonna take a gulp and the next you know you're empty like I guess we're having another one And then and then and then the cream. This is because I'm a real kid in a snob too It's like a real bad character trait, but you see the like the cream like Riding the glass sticking to the side of the glass you don't get that over here because they wash it with the wrong soap or whatever. But it's legit, it's legit. Yeah, okay.

I, yeah. West, sorry, you know, West Coast is what I think. Go West Coast, go see it, the open green, the rolling hill. That's like the post card version of I will. It's also beautiful. I anywhere out there,

Cliffsamo, all that type of stuff. Is there anything to do other than just go look at it? Just drink and miss you. And that's why I also, I mean, it's please, I'm over all that type of stuff. Is there anything to do other than just go look at it? Just drink and man. And that's why I also, I mean, it's an all-time booze bag. It's like, yeah, go to the bar, look at the field. I will tell you to bring a six pack

because those fields get interesting after about four or five beers. You like throwing rocks at sheep? You guys ever handle a car bar? I will say, Ireland has great tourism because it's all built around poos. So even if you go to the Jamison factory, it's just a museum but they give you Jamison the whole time. You're just twisted.

Yeah, it's got wasted. Yeah, and the whole thing. Guinness is like that. There's loads of bunch of walking tours in all the way. You're just hammered the whole time and you're like, all museums should just be drunk museums. I have no interest in singing a museum ever and I know all the ways. You're just hammered the whole time. And you're like, all museums should just be like drunk museums. I have no interest in singing a museum ever. And I know it's ignorant. I want to do, when I go to somewhere else,

I want to do what I do at home. And that's drinking a bar. So like, I want to drink it a German bar. I want to drink it in Italian bars. I want to drink it in Irish bars. That's what I want to do. Sit in my underwear and yell at my wife. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Column's tours, like, and if you see a guy named patio solo, then he owes me 500 bucks, he has. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I never, like, and if you see a guy named Patio Sullivan, he'll be 500 bucks gay as. I never, I thought when we were in a... So, you're Colin's bosses, huh? We did a pub crawl and the guy who was hosting, I guess, was a dork and like two local bullies from his childhood. Just stood there and made fun of him the whole time. It was insane.

He was like, guys, please leave. And they're like, shut up, you pussy. They're like, Tom, don't remember when you shake your pants and third dude. Do you want one of your tours? I mean, Jesus Christ. Oh, it was one of the fucking- Show him where your girlfriend dumped you.

We're in a corner. Where's your collatering pussy? Yeah, it was fantastic. Now, that chips on the rule. No one's ever told me they had a bad time in Ireland. Yeah, and that's why everyone was asking me for advice. I go, trust me, you're gonna have fun. And I have a copy and paste email that I sent to everyone.

People are always asking me where to go. And I was like, just, here you go, here's it. Should you do like bell fat? Should we, is that, if you're, no? Okay. All right. We just got to some politicals. I'm a territory here. Oh, you wanna, you know, all right, we just got to some political I will I'll return here. Oh you want to draw international borders

No, they'll hate that love you would want to hate that and you know what the bridge time funny The bridge I have a good sense you was a motto of cockay Petrol bomb Petrol bomb they call it in Ireland. Oh, really? Yeah, not a mallet that appetizer. What are we talking about here? It's just a mall top cocktail. Yeah, but I guess you could go up there Donnie Gall is really beautiful. I think Belfast will be kind of away. So it's like a bookie Fucking into Donnie golfer about three stacks. Yeah, the D was looking for you I'm sorry, Mr. Goll. Have your money right away.

Get behind on the ponies. Talk to Donnie Goll. Yeah, did the old room. I thought the Eagles played basketball. I took 120 points. I tried to tease it down. I got it to 1-18. The set-up is brought to you by BetterHelp.

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garbage. Do it gang. Aren't the horse races big over there? Oh, yeah, huge. Yeah, go see the ponies. Yeah, the ponies are good. A big day, yeah, but it's very much, you gotta get dressed up. It's like a whole, like, everyone takes that like, you gotta put on your nicest jersey. Yeah. Yeah.

Everything's like a mob, like, it's like you're going to a wedding almost, like, you know, the big, big, big, big, big, big suit. I would do that. I like that. If you timed it with the Galway races, that'd be particularly great. Yeah, that'd be very, very good.

The dogs are great too, but I guess it's, probably got to the dogs anyway, isn't it? No you can't track. They're not in the US anymore Dogs are fun night out. I don't know. They do have that down the floor to the gray house I think they I think they got rid of a great house might be one left Or there were I know they were in the process of shutting down or getting all shut I wouldn't want to see that nice doggy's They're built they were designed to run fast and be whipped and stuff They were designed to run fast and be whipped and stuff.

They were designed to be smacked to the shovel if they don't win. That was like they were bred to do that. So that's like that's part of their DNA. There's only two left and they're in West Virginia. That ain't good. Yikes. I don't have my passport on me. Yikes. Rather talk to Donnie Gall.

Then fucking. Then risk it. Then risk it. I can dog raisin west Virginia. Um, all right, but all right. So let's get into some fucking questions here gang. It's two secues with collie tape. That was a nice little segment. I like that. I like that. We talk.

We talk about the golf. Guys, when you sign over to Patreon, we will answer your garbage question on the air. And we aren't closing in on that latest goal of 12,,500 peeps and we will go to Ireland nice. I mean we'll see you over the whole time when you're over there Yeah, why are you gonna be over there? I'm always over there all the time Straight everybody out. I just I'm the commuter Also, I could see us going to a bar with you and like dragging us into some old beef that you have We're like you like you like you know rapid punch to guy back in the day Yeah, Susie walk in I go no beef that you have. No, sure. You like, you know, rapid punch to guy back in the day or something.

Yeah, Susie walk in and I go, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, walk in. I told you I'd be back. I walked into a 7-11 in Chicago with my buddy and the guy started by the counter started losing his mind. I told you get out. We got out front. I was like, what was that? I was like, I got drunk. I piss all over the tequitos.

I don't know. You thought we could go back. I can't take this. I do a lot of shout out to a tequito. Love a tequito. I get the quito. The catalic guilt. You wake up the nexto. I get the kiddo. I've, the guilt, the catalic guilt. You wake up the next day,

we're having a meeting with one of them. Oh, I don't, I mean, I could, I could finish out that they don't bother me at all. Oh, that's like a late night 4 a.m. Give me one of those things that's been rolling for weeks. You know what he likes, he likes a winging. Chicken wing? Yeah, and Kyle, you see me eat some chicken wings?

Oh, dude. You've had straight buffalo breaths, but I've been talking to you in the back of the cellar, dude. I've got the cheese all over my mouth. I'm an animal when it comes to food, too. I'm that sloppy mess. You don't really want to be near me. I'm so refined in this conversation.

Yeah, and I didn't even notice, but apparently when I eat, I don't know where I put my arm around my food. Like, this one I eat, like I'm in prison, like, it's my first meal. I didn't know until people were like, I'm dating people, like, you know, hurry, you're just like, I'm gonna my food like this and I eat like I'm in prison like it's my first I didn't know until like people are like them dating you know her You know how I'm like I'm gonna have them It's like the bull's ring Yeah, I'm a pig yeah, you're not a share when you eat are you? Oh, yeah, no, I'll share if you and if you and the if you and the bird go out you'll share an appetite

Yeah, yeah, I want to taste evidence. So you can taste whatever. Okay. Yeah, I'm sure'll share whatever. I'm not bad with that at all. Well, you. Oh, do I sit tight? How about you, Jobs? You probably want to pay a little bit more. No, I like to, I like to, I like to, like to community appetizers. I'm a, yeah, yeah.

No, I'm like that with all food. Share, share, give me a bite, give me a bite, yeah. I just want a bite of every single thing on the menu. Will you eat after somebody's fork? Like, if you and I were out to dinner would you use my fork? I I would but I know it probably looks bad so I probably like I'm not doing that but I honestly couldn't care less No, I Slurps a little if I took a lady in the Trump you Guys are splitting a chicken wing if I took a bite of a burger,

and gave you a bite, would you think a bite of that? Yeah. Kippy? I just had absolutely not. I don't even like eating burgers in front of you. I don't know. Well, I'm going to for tat on a burger. I mean, I'm pretty gross,

but shit, a bite of a sandwich. A bite of a sandwich is all right. Depends on the sandwich. Really? I'm surprised. I mean, what? Like with... To share a bite of a sandwich. all right depends on the sandwich really I'm surprised I mean what like with to share a bite of like if I had a sandwich not you I'm set other people Toby Toby had a column Mm-hmm column probably my problem with you two is you guys get a lot of hair around there's a lot of hairs getting on that sandwich I fucking mail mustache

And you are unaware mustache and you are unaware yes I was going to back with me Who puts me on a chicken farm? I'm gonna take a bite Oh man that's gross Yeah that's the br- it's a mouth thing Yeah for me I got you know

What if it's like- You think I have a gross mouth? Next question you know It's not- It's not dry enough to share. Dude, Sam, you don't have a commoto dragon. Also, sometimes I look over it and you're just lick your hair. Yeah, you're going. Oh, yeah, you.

I do. I chew on my beard a lot. Yeah, in the corners. I like to put a hair in my mouth and then pull it out with my teeth. Nasty. Yeah. Weird. But I share, like I share a a sandwich with you know who's big on that? It's Tommy Pope does the bite for bite. Oh, Tommy does like a bite and like, oh, you got a tassess and I don't mind that.

Tommy, I want to kiss him now. I know that. I'm trying to get close to him. I'm just I'm not even hungry. I'm like, yeah, I shouldn't, but okay. I'm allergic to seafood. You got better drill. Tommy, what have you say? Tommy kiss me. I'm gonna need melt them out. All right, but let's get into, let's get into some goddamn cues here gang. This is from Hot Boy Soup, $5 homie, never had one, Red. I'd like to get the international take on this.

In elementary school, did you wear an NFL Jersey to picture day? I rocked a damn Reno Jersey in fifth grade. I want one. I want to know what your school picture days were like. Did you do that like the yearbooks and stuff? No, no, we don't we There's no yearbook. There's no yearbooks. No, love was love was culture Classy, remember that time Everybody's got black eyes. This is every year.

Has someone from the same family? So what did you do school pictures? Like one big picture? We did. Oh, those are the, yeah, the wasp photo. They were paintings. I think they're all black and white and you're all covered in coal. We're all standing outside of an abandoned bungalow. We did have end of year photos that never went into a yearbook. It would be like you would take a home for your you would have it at the house. It gone display. Yeah, but it

was always in like a cheap, like almost cardboard. Yeah, like a paper thing. And then you had a class photo where you'd all stand together. Gotcha. We all had uniforms. So, I never in public school you wore uniforms.

Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's the standard. Honestly, it's the private schools that we don't wear uniforms, which I think is backwards here, right? Yeah, yeah, it depends. That didn't remind me though.

I used to, I'd love the senior class picture where you were, everybody was down in the gym. I never really got up and they were like, let's do a goofy walk. Yeah, I was worried. Yeah. Jockeying for position and that was big. Who you were sitting with,

where, you know, with the social structure. Showing off your collatering. I'm available. I'm looking. Guys, I'm looking. I never had a big, I, we never got really dressed up. Did you get like dressed up for school pictures? Senior year, yeah.

A senior year. It was big. Yeah, that's the big one. The senior one is, yeah, yeah. That's why senior class picture right back there with the paisley tie. You were blonde? No.

That's you. You know, when you play football? Yeah. Surprise, he hasn't told you. You got that job dude. That's a, that's a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy.

I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy.

I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a good guy. I'm a pull it better. Did you have, no. So I think we did a confirmation in communion, you'd have your photos,

and I don't think we ever did any of the photos. But I am curious about your, I was just for the priest. Did you have a high school quote? What's it on that? Sorry, no, I talked over, that was my bad. We did have a quote. I was gonna bring that up, I had a real,

yeah, I don't. Oh, fucking douchebag. Oh, you ruined it? Oh, dude, I worked on that for like two years. Oh, you were like, this is gonna, why was it Jethro Tull quote, you know, Jethro Tull is? Mm-hmm. You know what I'm talking about?

Oh, it's corneous musician. Quarterback to the Eagles. He's there. He's that healing, and it Jethro Tull fan, huh? Is he the game listener? Yeah, he's coming to my show. 20 of them September. No, it's a into my show. And then 20 of those September. I know, it's a band.

They sang locomotive breath and aqua lung. You know, I'm talking about band and the service. I know the name, but I mean, like, yeah. Yeah, it was spinning me back down the years and the days of my youth. You were still in your youth chasing your youth, didn't you? This guy's never been in the present world.

Yeah, and then I wrote something in my high school girlfriend. You got a quote I'll never forget you. You got a quote like from your debt bet nearly. So that was. Yeah, that's that's what a 90 year old person who's traveled the world. Yeah.

You're 18 going member of the good old days. Yeah, they're behind me. I thought that was it. I'm joy and well, you can. I know the pod was going to work out. That was it. I don't remember why, but I can find more chicken figures. I Was it I don't remember why but I can find more chicken figures

I can go flatbreads here. I think I can get it. I know my ear books at my is at my mom's house I can get my hands on it and find out what it was, but it's probably Some shitty lyric or something. Did you have one joke? No, no, we never had the books. I mean just a quote Yeah, oh, no, but I would, I'd love to have something like just... Dude, it's just fucking... Just some sort of... Of the IRA, take this. Fuck the queen. That everyone's quote in Ireland would just be fuck the queen.

That would be every single one. And if you didn't do it in the future... What? Who's side of you on? Well, you love the crown now, do you? What was it, some quote from Bano? Yeah, a jersey in a school picture for an American kid is tough, I think, right? I don't know, I feel like over there though, a soccer jersey would be acceptable.

That makes sense, I'll give you that. You know, no, I don't think so. I don't think you guys wear Where's not a pro Here a football jersey to like a wedding or something is that where is there people to do that with like a soccer? You know a soccer jersey. They they might in England with a More animals with a they have no class over No rules with those animals. But they might, well, because I think they're more neat

that more in the sport, sure. Because it's their local Manchester United. Yeah, as far as I know, but... Yeah, you're not supposed to really wear jerseys too often. I think to the game or watching the game. People wear the... Or do your favorite podcast? Yeah, absolutely. Well, I'm just My favorite team every need to know I know silly guy. What do you want?

Philadelphia? What neighborhood and filler are you from again? The West Philadelphia. That's why I was born and raised All right, he got me that works. It's got checks out. We got the letter recommendation. Yeah, you're boss. We'll Smith. All right, let's see here. This one's from $10 CPAP investor. Is it garbage or classy to tint your living room windows? My mom did this in the late 90s. I think I've seen it. That's fucking hard.

And I gotta be honest with you. I think I like it. What, you in the church? I'll stay in class. That's the only way. You ever been in a house out of a stained glass window? Oh, forget the fuck outta here. Yeah, I wouldn't sleep there to save my life.

Just catch a cold draft. No, no, no. I do like the window. I don't mind the tinted windows. Now you get a sun shade. What's the tinted wind? I don't even know what it's like. Like in a car.

Like in a car. I know it in a car, but I don't know it in a car. Yeah, you would just do it like you would put it on. I think I've seen like a film just to stop the, you know, to block it a little bit. You're not like, they're not like murder that. Almost like in the in the bathroom when they kind of have a, like like yeah, yeah, it's like a frosted window in the bathroom. Yeah, maybe I could see that in our old apartment, we, uh, we got into feeding the birds on the on the ledge because the cat could look at the birds, but the

birds kept getting scared away. So we put like a two way mirror on it. Does that make sense? So when the birds landed, they couldn't look in and see the cat. You're that paranoid. You think the birds are looking at you? Jesus Christ, try and see. They're all robots. I don't like that.

Try and see, isn't it? They're pigeons, stole my thoughts. The birds are just looking at this mirror and me and me on the other side is the cat just like. The cats, they look like. You're so, the cats look at them and cool at them. Like it was an interrogation scene. Yeah, exactly.

The kids live. Get in there. Good, good cat back there. Yeah, that I could see, but tinted on that. Dear tint in the house. I don't think tintin. As you, this is your rims on the patio. I said black, like pure black, like it's black trees.

That's true. It's true to put a salvesist on it. Fucking subwoofer. I remember. My neighbor had a red Mustang and they put red tint system in. Fucking subwoofer. I remember my neighbor had a red Mustang and they put red tints on it. And I thought it was the coolest thing in the world. Looking back.

Sounds cool. It's like something from cars. I know it was wild. I remember you'd be in it and felt like you were in a fishbowl, dude. It was fucking, it was, it was a tough hang in there. I was seeing when the ladies put eyelashes on their, on their cars on the, yeah.

I mean, that's trashy. Yeah, it's a tough look. If it's a girl I dude can't be doing that. No I like it. So you know they play ball. Hey what are you looking at sweetheart? Yeah but yeah but yeah one of your guys looks like it's as a stroke. Can you get a crash? Yeah I can. Bender bender is all fucked up. There's a tall hang in it. All right let's see this one's from Galileo. Is it garbage to be extra sweet to your elder elderly patients? I guess they work in a hospital and hope they make a last minute change to their will. I respect the play.

Yeah. You got to do that with people in your family too. Hey, you doing that? You know, I would imagine that probably happens every once in a while too. If they're in like some type of hospice care or like in a nursing home and nobody comes to visit them and they really take care of them. Yeah, you hear that happen too,

and then the family gets, oh, they get mad. They think they like brainwashed them, they go made up, you know. They're sure. They're forced them into doing this thing. Yeah. It was like, no, you're you haven't talked to them for five years. So, but yeah, no, that's a good play. I don't know if garbage probably on ethical.

I don't know if it's a frowned upon at least. Can't some type of hippo or or. And then worst case scenario, they don't put you in the will. You've been nice to this old person. So sure, it like you poison them. You should just be nice to everyone. Maybe like Yeah, poison You should just be nice to everyone maybe How about that actually how about take a lesson out of my book and be kind and sweet talking about petroleum bombs Take a page out a colleague book call someone I can't real quick. I'm just kind of I'm kind to everyone I mean whatever

Yeah, that's what I think of the nicest guy. I know sweetheart mother Teresa. Yeah, okay Yeah, that's what I think of the nicest guy I know. Sweetheart. Mudder Teresa. Yeah. Okay, sure. Mudder. Mudder Teresa. Mudder Teresa.

Mudder Teresa. Uh, let's see, this was some branding. Is it guards to keep a sock full of quarters under your bed for self-defense? I respect that. We always had something. Oh, wait, you got to have something. I feel like a sock, I feel like I would rip

if you really put some velocity on it. Let's kind of like a shotgun, a little buck shot. My dad always had something next to the bed. It was either like a sock, I feel like I would rip if you really put some velocity on it. Let us do kind of like a shotgun, a little buck shot. My dad always had something next to the bed. It was either like a little mini bat, or he had this like weird thing that he made, and like, Boy Scouts or something. That was a dildo. That was your mom's buddy. That is bad.

That would strut around the waist. It was a very unique, very unique weapon he had. Yeah. And we had intrud's a lot, I guess, because that was, every day I came over from school, he was practicing with my mom. I thought it was French, I didn't know. French golf club.

Do you currently have a weapon at the house or obviously apartments are a little different, because it's tougher to get into? But you have some sort of thing of like, I would grab this, this is the knife I would use, this is what I'm grabbing. No, no, I need to like that. I know that too.

Now I think about it. I usually, I used to have baseball bats just like, by the door, yeah. But never used it around it, but that's, I should have such a big Philly's fan. That's, yes, that's the guy to watch, because I'm enjoying the good old Philly's. He was so unsure about the name.

The good old, I was like, fillies. I was like, I'll, I'll, I'll land somewhere. Shout out fillies. Shout out fillies, we love you. I love the fillies, love the heat in comedy club. Love the fight in fills, helium, galley club. September 20. Get tickets.

But the, I think the coins are crazy, but buy a, buy a cue ball. With the coins and the cue ball, I think that the coins are crazy but buy it buy a cue ball And the cue ball I think you get better little way. Yeah, that's more velocity Put that money in the bank right and then I rack at the interest then you can buy yourself a knife Play the long game on them man a pole balls really good. I just don't think you get the The whippet corners also You're gonna cash those coins in eventually Yeah, of course I'm trying to hit a guy with two nickels

Fuck I shouldn't have went out last weekend got changed for 20 I'll be right back don't go anywhere You'll want weapons of you guy you went load it up like I got nothing right now. I'm playing it a little too fast to lose in New York. I got a knife That I would never get to or wake up time a knife. How big would we talk? Just like a little flip knife. Oh a little. Yeah, not a switchblade. It's like a regular pocket knife like an outdoors knife Outdoor knife is I don't even know if I could knife a guy coming You'd have to come in a guy coming you have to We're coming in a house at you to knife somewhat to stab so that is a very

Intimate yes, purse you're gonna get close enough to a guy and then yeah fucking poke him Yeah, I'm not saying I couldn't but that's I you'd rather hit someone with a fucking Have a fucking You gotta do that. I'd probably have a fucking Glock on you. It's a good screw in her hand. Yeah, that's fucking nickel. I haven't claimed more take him out before he gets in the hell.

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I'm relying there and I can hear the birds scratching away and I was like, that was fucking bird I'm lying there and I make it more noise and more and I go how funny would it be if there's someone broke in but And I'm just there think it was the birds the whole time I'm while I'm thinking that next you know the fucking door goes to the bedroom right and then the door open the bedroom the interior door yes yes listen yeah online there right the door opens up and I immediately go because I was on the other corner the bed I jump across the room like just like Go so it's on the other corner the bad I jump across the room like just like

Like I've never screamed loud in my life I'm like it was a beer like it was a wild beer Let me put some on Let me slip in something a little more comfortable. I'm not decent. I'm not decent You're putting powder in the ear arm. Yeah, I'm looking for a knife and ball gap rumor You're putting powder in your arm. Yeah, I'm looking for a knife and ballgap. Oh! So the door opens up, right? And this person walks it little black, like a silhouette. And I run, and I grow, and I write the last second, I realize it's like a woman, and I stop,

and then I realize it was my girlfriend, right? She. Wait, what? So here's what, but here's what happened. When we were asleep, she had gotten up and had a shower, but I thought she was in bed with me. You know you're kind of in and out of a sleep Okay, and then when she came out of the bathroom. I thought it was a fucking intruder

So I attacked her coming into her own bedroom. She was like walking out of the shower Open the door and then it's just me going Pind her up against the wall like this go oh my god. Thank God it's you who do you work for I got to thank God It's you thank you. Oh my god. I'm so sorry and then she's like she's frozen and she goes Oh That the lady cry yeah, and then she goes what do you do? Oh my god, I tell you're not true. Oh my god I'm a crazy person. I thought you were a pigeon. I apologize. Honestly, I thought it was my landlord I've got this like 90-year-old landlord little Greek lady and I thought you was my landlord. I've got this like 90 year old landlord little Greek lady and I You're gonna hit her The reason I stopped was because I thought it was her I thought it was an intruder and then I Nancy I apologize. Oh, yeah, yeah, I

She was like text me later on even that day like four hours later She goes like my heart's still racing. I think I need to come home because she's like almost got put through I'm coming home. Do not attack me. I will be entering the home. Yeah, he got a rebel the ring when she walks in Damn, dude, did I not tell I told the start? I don't know. I have a fucking crazy. Yeah There was at least I knew I at least I got the brownie point because if I didn't break in you're gonna like immediately attack them sure It was weird because I jumped As long as it's a woman in a town. Yeah, yeah, you were expecting cover. Yeah, it was a big guy I'm like, oh, this is where the good stuff. What a rant. I would have ran straight by him. Oh

God damn Yeah, but I was no that was an intense one damn that was an intense one. That's crazy. Yeah, I attacked my girlfriend I'll ask a story. Yes, you know, she's nice I'm gonna talk about the story. You know, she's nice. Oh, fucking Vietnam vet. Yeah. All right, let's see here. This one's from Richboro Pat.

Here from the start $10 homie never have one red shout out to you. Is it garbage to put gas in your car twice in one day because you're so jammed up? No. That's, that means you're put in there. That's maybe 10 bucks. Oh, yeah. Which I buddy been there.

Yeah. Gas to get you to where you're going. I've Maybe 10 bucks. Oh yeah. Which I buddy been there. Yeah. Gas to get you to where you're going. I've won memorable time in my life. I'm driving home. Nearly home. Had to get gas here or in Ireland. In Ireland. No money.

I put like four euros or five euros or something. Gas is expensive over there, no? Yeah, it's more of a fancy. Is it an all diesel? It's petrol. No, no, it's not diesel. No, it was diesel. Some diesel, no, it's not diesel. No, it was diesel Some diesel I guess not all diesel

From Ireland Yes, I don't know I know I want to work with you on this one. Yeah, I think you're a moron Turn a yes, and you but you are dumb I Thought they were all electric cars over there petrol means gasoline no, I know, but I thought they were electric cars over there. Petrol means gasoline. No, I know, but I thought they used diesel. I thought I was on it. Some countries do. Germany is a lot of diesel.

Okay, there you go. Yeah, so I, they're different countries now. So I, but I left, I left the gas station, the petrol station, and the light went on. That's what I left. Sure. While I drove out, the light was like, the light took a break for a minute and then went straight back on good Down a hill you're fucked. Yeah, I've never filled like car up with all the money I heard had in the world and the gas the light was still on

Because you know and that's when you know you're in a bad place when you know exactly how many miles you can get out of that light Sure, I've got I can I can sure yeah You're flying too close to this on if you know you're living a you're living a very Tight life I don't start I didn't start filling it. I didn't start saying fill it up until about a year ago I'm the same way like 11 months ago It was always 20 on this 30 on that 40 on that. Part of me doesn't like waiting too. I'm like, just give me 20. I'm just going here.

Let me just fucking get out of here. Dude, there is. Billing it up feels good. There it is. That's the, yeah. I feel like the car drives better when it's on a full tank. Everyone's happy with it. Yeah, your problem's all meld away once that fucking light

car turns off. Dude, there is nothing. I used to, I had a real shitty Chevy Luminos my first car and I would put, you know, five bucks would get me a quarter of a tank at the time. And I was always rolling on a, and there was nothing more devastating than having like three, you know,

doing like three bucks or something. Oh yeah. We're buying like a pack of six and I'm like, hey, put the rest on pump three and it was like 317 or whatever. And you see a Snickers, you're like, I got it, you got to get the SIGs, cause if you're walking, I got all the heat. I got all the heat.

I got all the heat to the next exit. It's cold out there. This guy's thinking that. And dude, starting the car and the thing not even moving is like so disheartening. You're like, fuck, cause in your head, you're like, all my problems are gonna go away. And you're just sitting there like,

oh man, I'm still stuck in reality. That needle doesn't know. Somebody asked this a couple of weeks ago, I can't remember, it was about putting oil. And there was a while where every time I went to the gas station, I got gas, I had to put fucking a little oil in the car too. To keep it, cause it had a leak or something. Yeah, I was a leak.

I'm in my car in my first heavy lume and I didn't know you... I didn't know what an oil... This is gonna sound bad. I didn't know what an oil change was. I didn't know you were replacing the oil, replacing the oil in the car. I always just had to add oil to my car. Yeah.

Does that make sense? Like I never took it to a jiffy loop. To get the oil. I would just go to Exxon and buy like, oh I'm low. I would just let it burn all out and then I'd be like, oh I'm low and I'd have to put more in. Fuck your engine up. Oh, is that not it?

Is that not it? Is that not the thing? No, you're supposed to go get a chain. Oil chains, they completely empty it and then they put, they put fresh oil in there. I would just let it burn all out and then add it That's what I'm up your engine. You can feel it dude It would start going I'd be like I gotta I gotta get to an ex on and fucking top this bit boil off

Well, I guess I guess you learn something new sure Oil and transmission fluid none of that stuff one of the one of the biggest is I heard from a I was actually a pretty scumbag Use car salesman be like pop the hood when I was like looking at use cars or whatever. And he goes, you have to constantly check the things that are clear. If you pop the hood, all the tanks that are clear are all, so you can see the levels.

If the transmission fluid has a clear thing, I guess the oil doesn't, but the transmission fluid should like, just a wiper fluid one. The transmission too to I have it I believe there's a good really all right What's like this line to me now that I'm saying it out loud. It sounded like an idiot. I tell like I've never been in the car before Sal Diesel Come on real car guys over now that I'm saying I'm like, well you can't see the oil you can't see anything now

I'm fucking you can't see the gas man this guy fucking lied to me here open in the radiator oh it's all one of those exploding the guys face one time my neighbor fuck you up dude a fucking he was they were leaning over and it popped all over his face and he ran and jumped in a above ground pool when I was a kid every every every when I was a kid every winter somebody would show up to school with fucking burns from the radiator on their face like in the houses. Oh, they were like, yeah, playing by the radiator. We were always taught don't go into the fucking radiator every every every year somebody would come in with a fucking splatter burn on their face.

You guys have heat in Ireland? No, honestly, like yeah, not really. Really? Yeah, radiators. We have to do, but like, I made a money. But I'm gonna put on a simple people. But what was the prime of the jacket and shut the fuck up? Yeah, not really really now you're radiators. We do but like I made a money But I'm put on a simple people. What was the primary source of heating in your home as a kid? We we running around trying to avoid the fuck of fists

Taco Tuesday's real right No, you know what we had we had We have hot water bottles which is you know what we had we had and we have hot water bottles Which is you know hot water well sure yeah, so you'd feel like a bottle I guess for boiling water and you put in the bed that was the fuck out of here I damn civil wars you know how that I we had don't I still I still use when I go home Yeah, we mad guys will put some in the bed. I got thanks There's no heat in the house. It's freezing. It's free in my house in Ireland. It is free You can see there has to be some sort of there's an ability to put on the heat which is what electric

No, I'm gonna be a radiator. Yeah, it's radiators. Okay. Yeah, it's water. They fill up from the gas It's oil, right? It's a big oil tank that they have at the backyard and I don't think that's helped me I've never been there yeah yeah it's the oil heets the water is it probably a furnace in the furnace yeah like that makes sense for the furnace he'd say it we sound like fucking idiots yeah I'm a more this is also if I did know years ago when I was like wait no it's ever asked me to do anything to I did know at a point yet for sure, but they didn't turn the heat on a lot They still don't I go home now. It's free. I can see my bread and like the house is free because we had a cold And we like

We like dry our clothes on the washing line and stuff like that So it was like you just have to wait until the water's good because it's what year is it there? She is man with industrial revolution. It's Ireland I love it now. You know what this is? My parents, I thought, You get the internet over there. 80s, I guess. 80, ultra-arlin's history has been pretty much the great depression.

So like, they had the people like grew up with, they're just like, you know, if you burnt your toast, you got to scrape it off. There's no such thing as another sight, stoves. Yeah, I got, yeah. Put that under your head. We're not the royal family, you know? I'll scrape it, you think I've never scraped a piece of toast.

Put the burnt toast under your pillow, keep your warm. Give me some of that burnt. Oh, give me a little bit of, share some of that burnt. Damn, a hot water bottle. That is fucking the old school. Yeah, and then, yeah, but we were doing we were like sick or something. Maybe.

Never. Or I think for like, in a dream. Yeah, stomach cramps. Yes, stomach cramps are like an injury, I think. Yeah, but I remember when I was young, so this is before they invented the, the, but I remember when I was young So this is before they invented the Okay, I don't think this is before they invented I'm sure there's people in Ireland listening right now Be like where does this guy live? What is he live under a rock?

Seriously like a like a Nickelodeon cartoon You talk about it like it's a third world gun? You were hanging your laundry out in the winter. Yeah, of course. Make sure to check the truth. He's a freak about Steve. I've taken it. No starch needed. I've definitely taken it with stiff clothes.

So this is before they invented the water bottle sleeve. So it was like a furry kind of a sleeve and you put the water bottle in and it's nice. Back in the day, it was just straight on that room. Straight rubber. Yeah, that would burn you straight off because you'd put it on and you'd get in. And it would like, shhh, scald your leg, yeah.

I'm in my fella sleep on some burnt my ass. I burnt my ass, I fell asleep on the fucking and sitting on the water bottle. So you get for sleep with a thermos, dude. And now if I fell asleep, burnt my ass, woke up, I had to get like, have you ever got a hot bag of water I can sleep with? I have to get some sort of netting type of thing, burnt my ass, woke up, I had to get like, anybody gonna hop back a water I can sleep with? I think it's some sort of netting type of thing,

put on my ass, some sort of like a third degree burn type thing. They're called underwear. He's got a fishnet. All right, I'll do that. We don't have all that underwear, man. Now we had a colestove, is what we used back in the day. A colestove, it was colestove. He's not gonna know what that is.

You know what, colest. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, coal stove, it was coal. He's not gonna know what that is. You know, coal is. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, fuckin' nice. Oh, nice. Put it in there. We had coal, real young, I think. Yeah, real young. But everyone had coal.

Made the place nice and tasty. Oh, yeah, when we grew up, it was just black smoke flying from all over. And then it became like an ecosystem bullshit thing. We're there, like, get rid of that. Bad for the environment. Right? Sure. I'm really painting this guy.

Dude, I'm like, I have a picture of your house in my head from your previous episodes as well, and it changes every two seconds in my head. We gonna change the day of the show. Are you stupid? It's too early to be so ridiculous. I used to have a cold call, or actually back in the day.

You imagine like Alice Island, right? You guys are talking about C-through cars, fucking... He's sleeping with hot water bottles. Heat? What is heat? Oh, God. All right, Jesus Christ, we are a couple of fucking idiots. Um, was this from Tracy?

What is the lowest stakes game you've ever witnessed that have... that ended up in a fight? I saw 250 year olds properly square up over a ski ball dispute on the ocean city boardwalk in 2000, 2004. That makes sense though. I mean, we've got in, we would have like game nights when we were like in our 20s and drinking like our cousins and stuff like, oh, we're all down the shore. Let's play fucking, you know, what were those games that hit? There was a apples to apples. There was like a couple of those cards against humanity. Parts against humanity.

All that kind of bog, not boggle, brain quest or whatever. There was a bunch of shit. We would do that when we played guns. We were kids. You know, you played guns? Yeah. And like, if somebody wouldn't go down, like, I shot you. Yeah, yeah, wouldn't go down.

Yeah, that would start a fight. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, like, tag or something, then they, like, you didn't get out. Yeah, wouldn't go down. Yeah, that would start a fight. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, like, tag or something, then they'd be like, you didn't get me. Yeah, it was always one fucking pussy kid. Yeah, yeah. It was always like a friend of a friend or like somebody on the fringes,

they didn't get me. Oh, fuck. I got you. Start swinging. But we would have, we'd be adults playing and it would end in like, near fist fights. Because you're drinking, you're boozing, you're like, Jenny, anything where the rules are up for debate is.

And there's booze involved is bad news. Like Scrabble. What's the real word? Busy is or John, three T's in a row. Yeah. That's tough. I try to step beer pong always ends in a argument a lot, because that's it. It's over, you know, the competition and then the booze involved it, you know, also everybody plays different

rules and stuff like that. Where is beer pong? Probably not. It's no, it is now because of the internet, but it wasn't when I was growing up. It wasn't like a pop wasn't it saying, yeah. I believe it is now more people that get involved. Just drinking drinking games. It's not really that big. I don't think in Ireland compared to here I can see that a couple way of life. Yeah, we're just all boozing all the time anyway I guess we have a thing all fucked up. We have a thing called Kings for a while. Do you have a play? Kings? What's Kings? So Kings is a card game every card has a rule Yeah, and then and and

Some of the rules are just like if you get three you got to pour like three Seconds over your drink into this big cup in the middle. And then very end, whoever gets the fourth king has to drink whatever's in the middle. And everyone's been pouring in that stuff, but you go, waste, whoever loses that. Or dad knows you get a five, you got to drink your drink for five seconds.

Yeah, you can like give out like, oh, I won't call him to drink for 10 seconds or whatever. I like that. Yeah, you're real fucked up. Yeah. That was like, the, well, I was one of the first games we learned in high school Aside from beer pong was kings. Can you guys play dominoes? You don't play dominoes? No, no, I

Doesn't make any sense to me. I was cool though. I saw it and I live in the high So it's there's a it's a lot of It's a Dominican neighborhood so they all play out on the streets and like they watch like watching It seems so boring to like I don't understand it But like watching it's like watching a board game. Yeah, you know what I mean? And it's they're enthralled by it. Hmm gotta get a table figure. Yeah set up shop you play dominoes fuck no Set them up knocking down pretty good. Yeah, that's what I thought dominant. What is it that dominoes? No, it's it's I mean I get numbers Numbers, no, but dominoes together Got to put them together. Is this set up? We're sounding more stupid.

Why the fuck does this keep happening? I don't know pizza. Let's get some. The Greeks playing out there. And the story, too. They'll play Domino's. Yeah. You just got a couple of old widowers sitting in their garden

playing Domino's. They'll play in Domino's. That bridge and pinoccal I never understood. Pinoccal. I know Jen Rummy. I could do a little Jen Rummy. Yeah, that's... I don't know what bridge is.

Burn your bridges, I don't know. Hey, just to look to you. Nope, I got nothing left. I thought I was like this old, like, old person game. Yeah, of course. It is a play bridge. Pinochle doesn't Pinochle have its own deck. There's a Pinochle deck. I always made me hungry when I would say that word pinnacle. Why?

I don't know. Because it reminds you of peanut brittle? Something, yeah. That's what I think of. Yeah, peanut brittle. People playing cards of peanut brittle. And I one thing I do know is a nice piece of peanut brittle. I love it.

Dude, I remember we went away for like a weekend, like in the poke, like out in the mountains or something, and I was in charge of bringing the cards. I was like, I got a deck of cards. I bought a set of pinnacle cards, and it's all Jackson. It's all Jackson Kings played old made. Dude, and we started playing. Do we started playing fucking blackjack? And everybody was getting 20s and 21s, the whole fucking. I'm like, I was, I think I was the house too. I'm like, don't get fucking bamboozled over it.

The winner winner chicken dinner. K hippies out three grand you scammed yourself We won shame on me man. I had the hot hand dealin All right, let's see this one's from Kyle is a car is a dip your potato chips into ketchup It's like a crispy french fry. I defer to the big man on this. I would say no I mean, but it seems like something you would get down on. The salty, sweet I get. Do they fuck with that over there, Colin? On your crisps.

Oh yeah, we look at a lot of ketchup. Yeah, a lot of ketchup on your chips. On your chip, like a frot of chips. Potato chips. Oh, your fries. Yeah, of course. Catch up on your chips. I've never hit.

Crisp. Yeah, I've never heard of it. But I guess in theory, you know, frot, frot, same type of thing. Yeah, this is the way I look at it. Yeah, I've never heard of it. But I guess in theory, you know, for I say, yeah, this is the way I look at it. When you're young, hate it. When you're younger and you're hungry, you're in the house. We've talked about this. You start experimenting a little bit. Sure. You do some things that, you know, you might not normally do. And it's not crazy. It's a potato. It's a, it's basically a french fry. It's not. You talk about it. It is. It's a potato. Potatoes a, it's basically a french fry. It's not. You talk about it. It is.

It's a potato. Potatoes and ketchup historically go well together. What's the fucking difference? It depends on what type of flavor the chip is like. Straight chip, like a plain chip. They do have ketchup flavor chips. They do have ketchup flavor chips. And they also have cottage fries,

which are basically just thick potato chips. I don't see anything wrong with it. I've never done it, but I can't find. I don't know. It's wrong. I can't explain why it doesn't feel right. I think. All right. Here's my astute observation on it works with a French fry because they're bigger and there's a dipping most chips are small and you're greasy and you're finger. It's like you're There's not enough space in your hand little catch. But but then for the French onion dip in a chip is fantastic Yes, it is Way and yeah, I don't know the chip in a French onion dip is that what you said? Yeah, yeah

Dipping chips in French onion dip. Yeah, but that's not what I'm talking about But that's not a dip ketchup's not a dip. I think it certainly could be ketchup is a condiment ketchup is not a dip What's the difference? I think be ketchup is not a dip. What's the difference? I think condiments on a dip a dip is a subsection of condiment. I've never got to a party and there's been a bowl of ketchup. All right, I was the wrong people. But you get it with your fries sometimes it comes out in that little side little little ramicking. That's a condiment. And you dip it in there. A dip is consists of multiple condiments. I would argue that I would say ketchup

consists of multiple things as well. It's not a dip. I think he was on your side and you just wanted. You just made up an argument to go with a little tomato's spices. Who's TV won here, man? I'm saying, are you with me? Yeah, dude. Oh, yeah, all right. It's screw you guys. But it's not a dip. It's not a dip. What I'll bring ketchup It's not a fuck if someone goes I'll bring the dips and they showed up with mayonnaise and ketchup You're a kick them out of your house. Yeah, I mean I mean, it's Sousin Some hellmins. Yeah, yeah, just because you can dip doesn't make it a dip you can physically yes Yes, what so you can dip a fry and ketchup, but ketchup's not a dip Yes, I'm saying it is a dip. He, that's right. And it is a dip.

He's saying it is, it's not a dip. I know. You don't put a dip on a sandwich as a condiment. It's not saying you can't, but you don't. How do you feel about this when you get a sandwich? Probably against it. And then instead of giving your fries, you get chips. I don't hate it.

I don't feel it. It doesn't fulfill what. Wait, what? With a sandwich. Sometimes it bothers me because I want the fries, but I like it's classy. It's a nice lunch, a nice light lunch. They do chips with the wings at the seller.

And those, that's perfect. A homemade chip, a homemade chip with like a burger, if there's like the real thick one. I don't want one of them back. Okay, would you dip a homemade chip in ketchup? Yes. Okay. Now we're getting somewhere. chip a homemade chip and ketchup. Uh, yes. Okay. Mmm.

Now we're getting somewhere. Now we're getting somewhere. But that's in the middle. That's more fried than chip. I don't know. It's in chip. You do know and you don't want to give it to me. No, I don't.

Okay, as long as we're all the same page here. But let's get some chips. We got to wrap it up, guys. It's a big thing over. Yeah, I think it's kind of frowned upon or something. There's something not right about it, but I can't figure out why. It would be nuts to, all right, looking at this way. Catch ups should go on things.

With fries, you could sprinkle it on the top of fries. You would never have a plate of chips and sprinkle ketchup on it. I might. No, because you would have. What do you mean you might? I'd have. I'm not saying that you wouldn't. Yeah, you're not spreading ketchup all across the big family bowl of chips.

Oh no, that's fucking... Just like the guy who's like the lemon on the oyster. Guys, I'll get this one. I'll get this ketchup on the top. This is for everybody. Have you guys go for ketchup, right? Say to assume everybody wants some red sauce. Hold on, that's something to ponder.

Let's say there's a thing of fries. This is the only show we could ponder this for eight minutes. Let's say, I like what you're thinking. Let's say there's a thing of fries that you got for the table. Is it proper to hit all over the fries or do you make the pool? You gotta make the pool.

You make the pool. You can't go all over, that's not. Really? You gotta have a vote for that, but pool. You can't go all over, that's not. Really? You gotta have a vote for that, but that's crazy. It depends on the, okay here, I always look at a little, it depends on the nozzle, it depends on the application of the ketchup. If it's one of the fine squirt ones, you can drizzle.

Gentlemen. I'll give you a drill. You can't do a whole thing. No, you gotta be able to spritz it. Nobody's using those bottles anymore What the old glass bottles? Really? They refill them that's that's not fresh ketchup. That's like this. Oh, yeah The Heinz these are they bought high-end ones in the

Yes, and then fucking just was an investment purchase Probably still some at the bottom of it that they never get to. The worst was growing up and you get to the bottom of it and you have to get your knife in and it would like a finger. You'd be almost like your fingers would come out covered and catch up. You know that and you can't get that last bit. Brutal. But I don't think that's great.

If table fries you can't just put your stuff. You got to have a vote and go is every- Oh yeah, you got to vote. I'm sure. Yeah. My mom would put a little water in the bottle and shake it up. Of course. Yeah, like shampoo. Oh Man there was nothing worse than fucking getting in there and spraying it and they're being cold water from like the day before

Get hit with cold shower cold Sutsu shower how to wake you up man fucking socked I hated that All right gang, we got a rapper Collin Turrell 30 minutes of Colin Turrell Sad on his YouTube page right now September 20th as I think we might have mentioned He's gonna be a really impromptu club in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Yes, can I just say one thing if you do anything if you do watch the special and because of this show Just leave a little comment and say something like garbage or just say go filly's at whatever you want to do

Tell them the buzzers. You do a little tracking. Yeah, it's a nice I'm done. He's gonna call me the fucking four days. Like you only got two fucking comment that will be that will be There will be I will be judging who I'm friends with and I'm not gonna publish my findings Everybody really knows is any of this word Ladies and gentlemen to call. Thank you so much guys. I'm not even fucking love you, man. Always a pleasure, man. Can't be what he got for guys. We're all over the road tickets are on sale. The first leg of the stores is starting this week or

you can't wait in a couple days. So Phoenix, there's still some tickets left. A little left in the second show in Denver. L.A. is pretty much sold out. Some at the second show in Denver. LA is pretty much sold out. Summit the second show in San Diego, Salt Lake City. Get those tickets to show them out. Don't fucking miss out. I love you. And in December, we'll be in Philly at the Fillmore.

We added a second show. December 20th, get tickets for that. Yes. Gang, we fucking love you, Death, and we'll see you next week. Peace.