Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Drop Out Trash

Episode Date: August 20, 2020

Kippy and Foley are back with a wacky episode as their guest bails minutes before the show. Good news is they answer more listener questions! The boys talk fast food, smoking sections, and whether or not you can ask for no ice in soda. Buy a T-SHIRT: https://podcastmerch.com/collections/presale Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Forman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

Hey gang, it's your old pals, Uncle Hank and Kippy. Just wanna thank you for tuning in to R U Garbage. Yeah guys, make sure you subscribe. That way you get the episode as they come out and you can also go to gasdigitalnetwork.com, use promo code AYG to get bonus content and get the episodes before they come out and HD streaming. Do it.

Yeah. Welcome to another exciting edition of R U Garbage. The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H Foley. Baby, a little bit of a late start here. Hey everybody out there and welcome back

to everybody's favorite new podcast. Well, apparently not almost everybody. This is R U Garbage gang, the show where you sit down with your favorite comedians and find out if they grew up classy or if they're complete trash. I'm your host H Foley coming at you on a little bit of a livid day here at Gas Digital Studios. You got a couple Irish guys that don't process things well.

We just got stood up. We just got stood up for the first time, gang. We apologize to everybody in the watching live right now on Gas Digital Network and in the live chat. First time it happened, we were holding out, trying to get them here and nothing. It's fucking me and Kippy sitting here with our corsages and our moms waiting to take pictures.

Speaking of Kippy, Kevin, James Ryan, everybody, give it up for my co-host coincidentally by the same name. Hey, gang, what's up, everybody? Thanks so much for tuning in, a guest, huh? Who needs him? Jesus. Hit the fucking bricks with this shit. Getting stood up second time too,

just gonna say with this individual. Listen, for the listeners too, by the way, me and Foley put on a good show for you guys. Oh, happy-go-lucky fucking Fatso and a bald man. When the cameras go off, we got a little bit of an attitude problem, which this is a thorn in my side, but I'm trying to be a bigger Kippy and move on.

That's the, yeah, it was really hard not to say the password for all the texts. We play it like fucking, you know, morning zoo DJs on here. Waka, waka, boom, boom, boom, got your nose. You never love me! You dumb whore! But yeah, what's up, guys?

Happy to be here. We're gonna do a fucking, we're gonna do another fan question episode because we have so many of, because you guys are so fucking awesome, you've been writing them in like crazy. So we have a whole fucking list of them that we'll get into.

We appreciate the sport. First things fucking first. All blood feuds aside. Yeah, forget about the fucking guests that's showing up. We're selling fucking merch, baby. Yeah, guys. We got hot teas. Hold on, we got an issue here.

We got a tech issue. Foley, you unplugged. Yeah, there you go. Nope, oh my God, there we go. All right, there's Johnny on his spot. I tell you what, thank you, B, our fantastic producer. I tell you what, when it rains, it fucking pours around here.

Next thing you know, I'm gonna have a fucking heart attack. Then Kippy's gonna be doing the show by himself. Can't get right over here. At this point, if I had a hearty right now, I go down, are you continuing? What? Get the ads in real quick. Check out Yo Kraytum, everybody.

Gotta wet my beak one last payday. Gang, the t-shirts are fucking moving. Make sure you fucking get yours one week, so you only have a couple more days when you air this on a Thursday. This comes out on Thursday. You only have Thursday, Friday, they're done on Saturday, I don't know what time.

So don't wait til fucking Saturday. They might pull it at noon, they might pull it at 3 p.m. I don't fucking know, but don't fucking wait for it. Who knows when the feds are gonna pull a no-knock? You know what I mean? They'll merge out the door. You get a friendly judge, you get a signature on that thing. Been watching a lot of Billions.

Shout out to Axelrod. You gotta pay off the wise men like in training day. Go get the fat man and kippy. So guys, you can go to Merch. I'm sorry, podcastmerch.com. You can get the Garbaggio t-shirt or the clean living t-shirt, they're both available in white and black.

And fucking so many people have fucking hit us up already. So many people have bought them. We got the numbers in it, eh, it's a good week. Thank you, shout out to everybody. But also, these are never gonna be available again. They're only available for this week, so let's just- Out back, here we come. And also, go subscribe on YouTube and iTunes.

Yes. We're fucking back, baby. Rubber band man, you can't hold me to fuck back. Let's go. That's right, we're feeling good. This is actually gonna work out. We're gonna have a good time together. Me and Kippy haven't seen each other in a couple of days.

You've been off fucking hiking somewhere. Yeah, what? Haven't you? No, I got this with you on Friday. I got blackout drunk for my birthday party. What are you talking about? By the way, fully, it's not garbage. He comes in, he rolls in fucking late wearing sweatpants

like a fucking- Wait, where, to the party? Yeah. I was fucking business casual. Yeah, real little emphasis on the casual. I had shorts on now. Yeah. I'll tell you what, man.

He comes in and buys me and my wife a shot of Jameson, like we're two fucking sailors at the end of the bar. Who fucking, who's wife drinks Jameson like that? You say, sugar tots, take a warm whiskey. I think at whatever trash bag you let stuff put down the aisle probably enjoys a good warm whiskey on a Friday night. I look over like, these are from Henry. I'm like, what?

Fuck's going on here? I'm like, for real, you're like, and then you're like putting your wallet away. If you used to, if you used to, like- I'm at another table with Joe Beshe and Don Rickles. Ask me if Chris and his kid. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah.

Yeah, bit of a, bit of a way. It was a good birthday. Happy birthday, buddy. Thanks, buddy. Thanks for coming out. I almost bailed you out last week and then I wanted to cap the weekend off because I couldn't help you out with the lease.

I figure, you know, what year was so little bit? Not to mention, they got this rule in New York city for all my fellow dirtbags out there that when you order liquor, when you order some booze, they got to give you a food item. You got to buy, you got to buy a meal. Yeah, not a meal. That's what they're considering.

I didn't see any coleslaw and pickles with my hot dog on Friday night, I'll tell you that. But that patty's putting out a mean steamed hot dog. Yeah. No sauce, no, you didn't need anything. No, I think they were Hebrew Nashis or I don't know what they were, but they were. Hey, let's leave politics out of this.

They were kosher, I'll tell you that much. Kippy likey. Oh, buddy, yes, happy birthday, my friend. Thanks, pal, I appreciate that. You know what I wanted to bring up? What's that? Speaking of the fans and everybody, something that fucking took Twitter by storm this week,

hot button issue was fucking brushing the teeth in the shower. We got a video from a listener. Yeah. It was actually brushing his chompers in the shower. Look like a clean cut guy. I don't know if I've ever gotten the official ruling on you, what you think about.

If you knew. What do you think I think about that? Well, I'll tell you what, if you knew what I did in the shower. You wouldn't want to, you wouldn't want your mouth anywhere in that fucking building. No way, dude. If you're brushing your teeth in the shower.

No, that's a cool thing. I'm sorry. What? No, let's get it clear. You are 100% pure cut Colombian garbaggio. Dude, that fucking, that's gross. Some people leave their toothbrush in the shower. Yeah, you're talking to one right now

across the night. Oh, dude, why you're fucking, you know, people are in there with, you know, cleaning their fucking butt cracks and shit. I'm not fucking brushing my teeth at the YMCA. It's me and my girl. That's nasty. Oh, a couple of drops.

We can have a special guest. Look out, the kids behind the ones and twos. Yeah, dude, no, it's fucking gross, man. That's insane. So what you, that's like licking the fucking, the floor of the tub. Stop with that shit. No, that's what it's like.

No, it's not. The particles in the air, you said, don't you feel fresh when you come out of the shower after you brush your teeth in there? I've never done that and I never will do that. Do you pee in the shower? Yeah, what am I, a fucking- Do you masturbate in the shower?

Today? For sure. See, ew, froze boo. Yeah, that's why I'm not brushing my teeth in there. That's where you do your wet work. You know what I mean? What are you, a conditioner guy? Kippy's kids are on the wall.

I mean, while you're fucking getting them, you're getting your bicuspids. Working up my fucking chompers. I, what do you, what do you use in the shower? Are you a conditioner guy to pull your little? Nah, I just go, just high quality H2O. Run it through the brittle first. You have sparkling in the back?

Nah, you just kept, you get it as hot as you can, real steaming. I don't know if we've ever discussed this. Burn the tipple. It's like you gotta sterilize an needle before you take the splinter out. You know what I mean? Have you ever heard like old school guys saying

that if you're ever worried about like STDs or something like that, as soon as you can done having sex, to dip your dick in like a bunch of alcohol? Have you ever heard? I don't guys that you're dad. I think I, I think you kept your mom so long. It's a clean whistle.

Kept them off the Pabschmere, you know what I mean? No, that's what I know. Like porn stars do that before. They like wipe down with alcohol and it'll burn if you have any nicks or cuts or little holes or sores. And let you know what's up. Yeah, don't do it, don't mind. Kippy's got a couple of fucking rumble strips on the side.

This kid's all Pringles over there. What do you think? I wanted to ask you, what do you think is the trashiest of all toothpaste? Cause that video made me think of it. I don't know, I go- And I'm curious what he was using. He looked like an aquafresh guy to me.

Can I just say that? Aquafresh is, if you're going name brand, that's okay. I would say Aquafresh. I would say, I don't even say they still make it to be honest with you. Trust me, they do. It's fresh. The bottom of the bar, I don't know.

Aquafresh at least has some flavor. It's got some tan, it's got some good marketing behind them. I'll get on board for sure. This guy's over at Grant and Wheeler. They know how to sell some paste. But if you're using fucking AIM, that's, dude, that shit might as- That's like fucking white out, that stuff.

What's going on with that? Did you ever sleep at a fucking uncle's house? And he bust out the AIM like you're in fucking NAMM? Dude, that shit's, I don't even think they sell full tubes of it. They sell it like half empty rolled up. Yeah, you either get the travel size or industrial. There's nothing in between.

It's- I always thought close-up was pretty trashy. I don't think that, that would never came across my radar. Cret, you know- I imagine your mom was using, when your mom was single and hitting the mixers in the happy hours, she was using close-up. No, we were at Crest.

No, we were, we've been at Crest house all for 30 years. Trust me, she had it in a separate cabinet for Friday nights when she went out and left you and your bozo brother with pizza money. No, you know, it was real nice though. Well, I'm talking, you wanna separate the fucking, the men from the boys. Wait, hold that, what is this?

The class from the garbage. Dude's paced. I'm talking, there's a fucking upper echelon up there that'll knock your socks off. Hell of an artist too, Rembrandt. Oh, who's got that? Dude, that's like fucking- That's in like the freezer section at Whole Foods.

Dude, that's Rockefeller stuff. That shit is, I don't even know anybody that's ever used it. I remember my buddy's growing up his dad had, and we weren't like, you slept over, you were not allowed to touch his shit. You had to use the like, his Rembrandt, it was in like a fucking, only during emergency case above the mirror.

That doesn't do it for me. That's Whole Foods shit. That's like Tom's. Ever used Tom's toothpaste? No, fuck Tom and his fucking dentures he gives the kids or whatever he does. What you need to do is go get yourself fucking arm and hammer. That shit, you can't go back.

It'll take the fucking, it'll take the rust off your car, dude. Dylan approves. Yeah. We used to, this is how trashy we were. We always had like, Crest, Colgate, or whatever. But this was either before the arm and hammer fucking put two and two together, but we used to actually finish brushing our teeth

with actual baking soda. I did too. I mean, try not to let it get on your taste buds because buddy, that would ruin a glass of OJ. Too sweet. No way, dude. Hold up on the crustables for a couple hours. Holy shit.

That'll be stale. I remember my mom would like, I'm like, what's this kid? I remember asking her at one point, I'm like, what does this shit do? Like, what's the main purpose of baking soda? Cause it's in the fridge. We're cleaning a fucking silverware with it.

I'm brushing my teeth. What the hell's going on here? Pouring it in the fucking gas tank to get a couple extra miles. Is that what you do? You ever heard of that? No, I'm not fucking. Yeah, put some arm and hammer in your tank.

No, that's not a thing. It's like gnaws. What's that supposed to be? You'd be like fucking, Nose? Nose. Nose. Yeah, you need some nose gnaws.

That's, what is that shit? Is that, that's racing stuff. Why don't they, they have an energy drink too. Fucking Vin Diesel. What do you mean? What, what is it? What am I fucking, Bill Nye the science guy? I'm sure you're fucking you and your dirtbag buddies.

I had a couple of buddies that had gnaws. I'm sure you trucker hat, fucking selling E at the rave. I know how you do it. No, we had a couple of buddies, a buddy's dad had gnaws in his car. I was like the big thing. The dad?

Yeah, they were fucked. They were, I mean, dude, I hung out with fucking pure. I hung out with dirtbags with money. That's what we were like. Everybody's dad owned like a construction company or something. So there was a little bit of gauge floating around

and he's derelict, didn't know how to spend it. I mean, dude, I remember some people's cars were getting repoed, they were coming and taking dirtbikes away. It was a fucking scene in the early 2000s. Don't touch my gnaws. That car belongs to my mother. It's in her name.

That's trashy too. Oh yeah. Somebody else emailed and I thought this was brilliant or messaged me and I was asking if growing up, did your parents ever put anything under your name? Yeah, you did? The piece?

No, no, we're gonna plead to fifth on this one. There's still some legal cases pending. Moving on. The lady's looking for you? What? Rent the center's looking for you? No, there's a couple of big ticket creditors looking for one, Jim Ryan.

Spunky Ryan or whatever the dogs. Patches. Patches Ryan is a $200,000 fucking line of credit limit at his supply house. What's going on? Dead. Not gonna get that money from now. What's the rule with that, by the way?

If you, I know you're married, but if let's say you're a single guy, all right, but you're an adult and you for some reason pass away unforeseen or quickly, whatever the word is. This has fucking, this has slip bed, slip and fall scam written all over it. Say I was to get a credit card, right? And I was to run it up and then all of a sudden

I disappeared. Who pays your debt? Like say you owed debt. Say you had credit card debt. I think it gets passed to kids, it gets passed to your next to kin. I don't know if you, I mean, I think. Next to kin?

That's not fair. I think credit card debt does. Yeah. All right, credit card debt, but other things. Well, I mean also too, like if you own like, if you owe like fucking, if you're upside down in a house, that goes to the kids.

The kids got to clean that mess up. No, no, no, no, no, no. Let's say there's no house. I'm just saying like an individual's debt. And you have no kids, it doesn't go anywhere? No kids. They don't go after your parents, do they? Yeah, whoever I think whoever.

It's like your next of, that's next of kin I think is whoever is the next in kin line. I don't, what am I, the fucking, the auto expert, the legal expert, what's going on here? I don't know, but I put you down as next to kin so you might be feeling a couple of calls. All right, let's get into some questions. Why would, what are you stealing my lines here?

Jesus Christ, he sees me pick up my phone and start reading. Let's get into some questions. I'm the host of the show, I'm not the fucker. Relax buddy, take a fucking clarity. You got me this fucking coffee. Plus we were on the launch pad there, we're waiting, the boys are looking at us. All right, I got a couple.

I got a couple. I believe that stood up at the fucking altar. I got two personies. This ain't the fucking Bozo show, Dylan. We're doing pretty good. We're floating around the top 200. If you ask me, he's missing out. Yeah, for sure.

Well, that sounds like something my ex-girlfriend's mother would say. And she was, not missing out on anything. Jeez. You just gotta give it some time. Steal in case of soda, do you want me to leave her house? All right, let's see, I got, these are two, this is one for you that I kind of wanted to say

for a guess, but we can always talk about it with a guess. This was a bit, okay. Have you ever bought chicken in a can? You mean like tuna? No, I mean chicken. No, but is that what, that's not like a whole chicken in a can. Oh no, no, no.

With like the bones and shit. They do make those. Yeah, no, not that. And they're actually fancy. They're little Cornish game hands. Yeah, that's not fancy. If you were doing like a nice picnic somewhere. No, I'm talking, have you ever gone to like fucking CVS

and got a can of poultry? I'm sorry, what was the question again? Yes, and I've made chicken salad with it. Okay. And I gotta tell you, it ain't too shabby. Dude, I'm telling you. You'd be surprised what a little sweet relish and celery will do to a fucking dish.

I was about, let's call it, you know, a young spry 1920 years old when I found out the fucking Rite Aid sold chicken right next to the fucking plastic silverware and Kippy was all about it. Dude, this is what I do. Hey, is this for your range? But you're not a male guy.

No, this is what I would do. I'll say this, I remember- Taking home and eating in the shower. Jerk off real quick. But don't brush my teeth. I used to, you used to eat some pretty gross meals to me when we lived together down in Philly when I was living next to the washing machine.

Yeah, I love how the guy who lived in my basement is judging me on what I used to eat. But you would just- Meanwhile, you were in the basement huffing gas. You just did poor fat guy differently than I did. You would do- Like what? You would do like buttered noodles and tarp.

Oh, yeah. It's like a little bit of hot sauce. No, I wouldn't put hot sauce on my noodles. I'm not a fucking animal. You had a little Frank's red hot on that one. No, never, never, never. Do a little bit of cheese. Dude, for the listener, Kippy would come home from work

like fucking John Goodman. Just fucking sloshing around, bitching about traffic and this guy, fucking some jerk off at work, couldn't make the sale. And he would fucking, he would cook up his buttered noodles and Parmesan cheese. Never off for me, any. While you were living in my basement,

behind on rent fucking smoking my cigs all day, drinking my beer. The one time he drank a whole case of fucking Dr. Pepper and we called him and he tried to hide it. He buried the cans out back like an old retriever. Ah, I forgot about that. Yeah, well, like someone's going, I had a 12 pack of Dr. Pepper here.

And we're like, well, I didn't have any. I didn't have any. Meanwhile, Foley's fucking mums the word down the basement. And they're like, four is gone, fucking no, no, no. I'll tell you what. Not about 12 Dr. Pepper. Yeah, you put Dr. Pepper in the mix. I'll see you in the morning.

I don't know what's going on. I'm like a werewolf when I get that shit in me. Yeah, whatever. So yes to the chicken. I, yeah, I used to take it. I used to put it on a frying pan, a little bit of hot, a little bit of red. Oh, yeah.

And then on white toast too, but a slice of American cheese. Oh, you're making a chicky cheese thing. Oh, yeah. To order. Yeah, I was. Bad idea. Yeah, dude.

It's already cooked. So you just got to get a little crisp to it. You know what I mean? Like, you know, I was, I was, I was in there like it was Jim Steak's daddy. Oh, I was kippy like chicky. Toad onion, set him up. Yeah.

Toaster oven, boom. Throw the things in. Fucking just a spatula full of fucking meat and cheese on. Frank's ready hot. Let's do it. Wait, you would toast the bread? Yeah. You can't put that fucking moist.

That would seep right through like a piece of loose leaf. You got, you need something with a little base. You got to change the molecules on that shit. Burn through the ziplock right there in the spot. Holy shit. Yeah. I'm telling you, and I think about that meal, I don't know, once a week and I go,

maybe my wife's got to be out of town. I can't, my wife can't see me making fucking canned chicken sammies. You know what's weird, man? And I think this is a very are you garbage, like inherent thing is I do sometimes crave things like that. Things that I ate when I was poor, or not that I'm not poor now,

but you know, I get myself something to eat. All right? I'm selling a couple of t-shirts here. I'm doing okay. By the way, podcastmerch.com. Get it while it's fucking hot. Yeah, let's go.

We're gonna break some records over here, baby. Get on that. Fucking slap down some plastic. They say if we sell 5,000, we get a new blender. So that's where my eyes are at. And the minutiae's coming for us. Steve minutiae's gonna send you something nice. Yeah.

Spread the wealth a little bit. You got to keep this economy going. All right, I got, this is one that I've, this is a fat guy hidden secret. Hold on, I have a couple more trashy meals I wanted to share with you. Okay. You ready?

Yeah. Number one growing up, in home ec one time, we made beef stroganoff. You know what that is? It's basically cream of mushroom soup and sour cream and egg noodles with maybe some meat. But at home, I was just doing a can of cream of mushroom soup,

not adding the water and putting that over pasta. Oh. Yeah. Who said that, son of a bitch? Pricola, Pricola. Bill, those got to be a little louder, but they're good. We are Florida radio.

Oh yeah. That's trash, dude. Yeah, I mean, that's fucking. And I'm a big tuna guy. You're eating chowder pasta. What the fuck? I mean, dude, that's insane.

You mean, you're eating concentrated chowder pasta. Condensed, that's the term. And I'm also a big tuna guy. Big tuna melt guy. Yeah, man, you get into tuna, I don't know, every fucking third episode, you do 20 minutes on. Do you like a tuna melt, though? No, I don't like tuna.

I love an open-faced anything melt. Patty melts are not really that big, big one. Shout out. You know the hamburger on the rye toast? Yeah, I don't. That's too fancy with the onions. But go ahead, what were you asking? I don't do any of that.

This is one I used to, this is a fat kid garbaggio. When you're fat, you'll find real trashy ways to fill that need. You know what I mean? Every girlfriend I've ever had has said to me, it's amazing what you can find. What you can do.

That you can figure out to make for yourself. Because they won't eat it. No. But there could be nothing in the house. I'll come at you with fucking some kind of olive and jelly. Little bit of Old Bay or something, get it cracking. I'll make it work.

And I'm so trashy and I'm such like a sickness with my fatness that like, I'll clock that out months ahead of time. Like, all right, if worse comes to worse, I have that up there. I got that up there. I could do this. Put these two together.

That's weird. Yeah, it's fucking fucked up. This is our you garbage, baby. Yeah, no, that's just weird. This is what I would do. Have you ever had, have you ever melted down? Did you ever get the bloat? Some old earrings.

Tried to make a quarter. Melted down chocolate chips and dipped pretzels in it to make chocolate cover pretzels. Dude, who are you fucking? The Kibler elf. What do you want from me, daddy? I just picture you a little fat kid

in the sweatsuit on a Friday night. Your mom's out. You're double, double boy. I got my, I got my Adidas warmups on for sure. For sure. Now I never did that, but I did take magic shell. What you know that is magic shell is a Hershey syrup that you put on top of your ice cream.

And when you put on ice cream, it turns solid. Put it on your bowls. It turns solid. I used to put not ice cream, but like, you know. Lasagna. I would put like pretzels or something like that on wax paper, put the magic shell on it, put it in the freezer for a couple of minutes

and then. Yeah, that's relatively the same thing. I mean, we're making chocolate cover pretzels out of things that shouldn't be made chocolate cover pretzels. I remember one time my mom was doing it for like cookies or something like, and I saw it like heated up the more I go,

what the fuck is this boy doing? Birds on this. Kept it to myself. Wrote that down to my little notepad. My little, wrote that down in the meeting minutes. I felt like none the wiser just kept it moving. Yeah. And I was like, I'm gonna wait

for this fucking old bird leaves to work. And I'm gonna get those Toll House mortals out and start fucking cooking crack. Like I'm Rick Ross. Let's do it. When you're into the fucking chocolate chips, man, you're in a bad way. When you're going for the semi-sweets,

you got fucking issues. Yeah, it's really every baker's chocolate. It stinks. I have. But it'll take the edge off a little bit. Get you through to the pizza games here. If you're jammed up, it'll get you out of a pinch if you need it.

Many a night to have a top and toe house semi-sweets like they're fucking tic-tac. Watchin' the ball. Taking shots of vanilla extract. You ever eat just sprinkles? I don't even do that. I've done that. I free-based them.

Just sprinkles. God. All right, those are my two that I've been holding on to. The chocolate chip one actually came from a listener. I forget who it was. Well, thank you. Thank you very much. But he tweeted me and I'm like, that one,

I deleted the tweet, it cut to my soul too much. All right, let's go here. This is from Kevin. This is a tough one. I don't think you'd do it. But anybody in your family, refer to your girlfriend or your wife or whatever as your old lady.

I mean, I think I do ingest. But that's it. No. I mean, older uncles and stuff like that. I had the old ladies bustin' my balls. Yeah, that's a little ingest. That's kind of like, you know. Yeah, no.

Do you say like my pop? What the fuck are related to Popeye? My pop or my old man too. I say my old man and we call my dad pop. Why? Because that's his nickname, pop, because he's a grandfather. What'd you call him growing up?

Stephen. Frankie. I called him dad, you fucking bozo. You ever call him daddy? When I was a little kid, if I wanted something, yeah, if he was holding that on the semi-sweets, gotta butter him up a little bit. Yeah, of course, when I was a kid, I'd call him daddy.

I still have like grown up cousins and stuff that still say daddy. Like, you know where daddy is? Sounds like meanwhile I'll say, dude, you're a fucking carpenter in the union. What are you doing? You got a pension and a 401k, you're saying daddy. That's pretty trash.

Yeah, real trash. This is one. What about mom? Do you call your mom mommy? No, I call her mom. Call her fucking and give her my fucking bank account number. Tell her fucking, let me wet my beak a little bit. It's the first of the month.

I call my mom mommy sometimes still. I call her mother as a joke. Yeah. Call her by her first name too. Which I would not repeat. Yeah, I've only said nine times this episode. Dumb bro. Shoot.

Did your parents ever use coupons when you went out to eat? That's from Ohio grown. I lose it. At the grocery store, I would tolerate it as a young man, but now, now. I used to hate when for a while, remember gift cards were big? Like you give each other gift cards to go out for stuff like that.

But I remember when the gift certificate, I used to be embarrassed. Some cheap places still give you the actual like paper that says like 200 with John's name on it. And as a server, when I would see that after like a fucking $200 meal, that there's some fucking loose leaf sticking out of the checkbook.

And then you go over to explain it. Well, now we have, we think there's 25 on here. Can you run this first and see? And then I'm only gonna tip you on the fucking difference. Jamming up on that. Oh, yeah. They're all scumbags. Fucking, I used to get my old job.

They used to fucking my Christmas bonus would be in those AmEx gift cards. Oh, I remember. I used to think you were a fucking Gatsby. I never in my life. Rolling around with a fucking stack of M. If you get a good Christmas bonus, I don't care what your job is.

You're doing A-OK. Never in my life have I ever gotten a Christmas bonus where I was like, holy shit. I mean, dude, you got like fucking 500. Nah, it was like a thousand or 1,200 bucks, I think. What? Yeah, it was like a thousand bucks to give us one gift cards.

Dude, that's fucking insane. Well, they were kickbacks from their corporate cards. Gives a shit where the trail starts. Oh, I know. I was fine with it, but. Who cares where you get the water from, baby, as long as it's drinkable? It always starts off.

It's around that. Could you get them right before Christmas? So it's especially in New York at Christmas time. It's like everyone's running around. You're shopping. You're drinking. You're boozing. You're walking.

So it's like, those cards are going quick. All right, there's 50, you know, you go by. Plus there's, you don't have to worry. If you lose one or something like that, or you think it runs over a little more, it gives a fuck. My name ain't on it. After Christmas or so,

you end up with like a handful of cards and you're going to the website, plugging in the fucking card number. Like, all right, I got 319 on this one. I got 220 on this one. You're looking at ways to combine them and you're like. Oh man, that's real.

And you're like, end up for a pack of smokes or something. And you got to be like, well, it's 14. Well, there's 280 on this one. I think they're not, one's empty. Okay. Well, and you're calling the number for to find out how much is on your fucking gift card. Dude, I was, I have the American Express rewards site

saved in my phone. I could go in and just plug in my numbers and get my bat kippy's little balance. Oh, we flew to Hawaii. That's what we did because we took a bump and they gave us fucking like 500. The voucher, yeah. Yeah, but it was in a, it was in an MX card.

Yeah. And I tell you what, the first couple of days I was living high off the hog, like I was fucking chair rolling around. It dries up real quick though. That five gets to three, that three gets to one. Next thing you know, you're in fucking double digits being like, what the fuck happened here?

Bunch of empty pizza boxes floating around that house. This is good. We appreciate you guys rolling with the punches on this one. Yeah. What are you gonna do? I know, hey, you know, rubber band man. This is a big one. Did you have to spend any time at parents or relatives

works because work because they couldn't afford child care. Yeah. I used to go to work with my mom and I would, I don't know if it was because we, I guess maybe it was because they couldn't afford child care. Couldn't find someone, but see, there was no. I don't think it wasn't, they couldn't afford it. It was like, I don't want to,

I'm not paying you a hundred bucks to watch this fat idiot. No, I don't think my mom, I mean, other than like maybe the lady in the neighborhood, but my mom would always get like a cousin or somebody to fucking watch us. And they would, they were like five years older than us than like in high school. They'd roll in with like fucking four of their friends,

a couple of birds, fucking a keg of beer, and they'd fucking have a fucking nice little time. Now your parents are at work? Now if they, yeah, work, they went, if my mom worked at night, they would sneak it in. Down at the docks. Ha ha ha ha, she worked, she was a manager of a gap back in the day-day, original, when it was lowercase,

real trashy. Ha ha ha, real hippy shit, hit the brick. But no, I used to go to work, she worked at the mall because the gap was in the mall. Shout out to the Wyoming Valley Mall in Wilkesbury. We'd go there and we'd fucking mill around for a little while, like hide inside the racks of clothes, hang out in the storage room.

Patty, we told you you can't bring that, there are fat kids around here. The one's finger in the mannequin in the back. I got busted one time because I stole a dollar out of her purse. Out of your mom's purse? Yeah. The mannequin. And walked down to like some like pizza place in the mall and got a super pretzel, soft pretzel with cheese.

Listen, let's put a pin in the hole going to work with the family thing. You want to know what's not too shabby for the old Kiparuni. What's that? It's going to an ice AMC theater and getting the fucking warm pretzel nuggies with the warm cheese. You get a big old cherry Coke, you park your keyster in about the middle of the theater.

Dude, if you get some high school kids. Heal that cheese open, dude. It's fucking gone before the fucking preview start. If you get a high school kid with a heavy hand, you can get a couple extra nuggets. Those are fantastic. But I'm going to say this. I don't like the jalapeno cheese.

I like regular cheese sauce. Listen, you know, beggars. I don't like when it has a little spice to it. Why, I hurt your tum-tum. Fucking nine year old with acid reflux. He's drinking Pepto like an old detective. Let me get a private second. I got an ulcer.

I can't deal with this shit. But my dad, he would take us to work with him. I mean, like fucking, the only days I would just, and he'd be like, I got to run in here for like a meeting. I thought it was awesome. I liked it, but dude, there were times where he'd be like, I got to pop in, he would take us like a job meet or something.

I don't know. He made it. He's got to get a site. He's got to be against OSHA regulations. Oh yeah, for sure. I mean, well, he had me like five. I was doing like shutdowns and shit when I was 12. What's a shutdown?

You have to like go into a building and shut the water down and like replace the fucking pipes. Because it's like water mains and shit or whatever. You have to walk through a building by yourself. I thought it was so cool, dude. He was a fucking 12 year old. He had work gloves on. He had boots on.

I had like, I had that belt like, you know, I thought I was Batman. Little Fisher Price doctor. Yeah, it was like some security guards letting in this basement where nobody goes. Hey, don't Tony. Yeah, Tony got a cup of coffee. Tony, I run the store.

You want anything? Extra, extra. Yeah, man, I fucking loved it. But he would just, we would sit, I remember we would sit in cars for fucking, what seemed like five hours at a time. I mean, my brother would just end up fist fighting fucking once a month over like the radio

or you've been in the front seat too long or fucking, you know. People don't do that shit today. It was fucking wide open. My dad just didn't give a, like he would just be like, yeah, he had the keys during the car. Like, and they would just leave for an hour or two. That's fucking tragic.

I know. I remember at one point I was like, this has been too long. Like this is too long. Somebody grab you. Yeah. Please, let's hit a fucking chip fillet or something. My dad would take us to work. And that was always a fun time

because he worked at a little, he worked at a naval base. So we'd run around fucking state. They had like this torpedo in the front lobby, a fake one. But, you know. I thought it was real. Fuck you. He was in G.I. Joe.

We were in the bathtub. Fucking you and scuba Steve hanging out. I know we'd run around there, but that's garbage. It is. If you go to work with your parents, your trash. Yeah, that was from humble beginnings. That was from Ricky. Thank you, Ricky.

Yes, this is from Matt. Have you ever taken medication anything with beer? Oh, what? I take pills with whatever is in front of me. Sometimes the toilet. Okay, what is? I usually, I usually, I, unless it's a fun pill, which I don't do anymore.

But back in the day, if maybe I was mistaken of popping a perk. Up or down or sideways. I would want to switch it around with a little bit of something. Yeah, take the coating off, let it hit the bloodstream. I would usually chew them and break them up. Oh yeah.

That's good. Brian's tapping his nose. Yeah, dude. That was a big thing too. Like, especially like hungover or fucking headaches or whatever, you fucking couple advils or whatever. Wash it down with a nice yinger or something like that. Fucking get the day steaming.

I like it. There's a lot of Coors Light for me back in those days and you're just fucking. Wait, in the morning, what are you talking about? Now, if you got like a hangover and you're on a bender or whatever, we were drinking Coors Lights. Craft beers weren't out.

I thought they weren't readily accessible. I'm not judging you that it's craft beer or fucking domestic. Yeah. It's still garbage. Dude, nothing wrong with a little libala de plata. Now, this is one, this is for Matt. Shout out to Matt. My family didn't fuck with this,

but did you guys go to the Cheesecake Factory and think it was like a big deal? Let me tell you something. First of all, Cheesecake Factory didn't get hot till I was fucking, I think, in my 20s or 30s. I think I've seen one, dude. I don't know where the fuck they are. I've heard things.

Oh, there's fucking, they're everywhere. I've heard things. I've never seen one. There's not one around where we grew up. Might be one. Things. It's no Applebee's, I'll tell you that much. No, come on.

Stop, you're embarrassing me. Stop. It's no Fridays. But they know their way around a fucking potato skin. I'll tell you that. Never did a Cheesecake Factory. Never did an Outback either, to be honest with you. Oh, you wanna talk about trash.

Outback Steakhouse, for my fucking parents, might as well- Really? Might as well be the White House Correspondents Dinner. Cause they fucking roll it out. Go open. Couple of Bloomy Onions, fucking the whole Kit and Kaboom, maybe steal a steak knife from the way out.

Those steak knives were fucking out of control. Yeah, big, big, big. Really? That, and if you wanna get a little fancy too, Karabas. Karabas Italian, trash is what it is. spaghetti turnpike or something, whatever the fuck it's called. Yeah, it's no bueno. But like growing up, I was-

They really pushed the shells at places like that, like the Manicotti. Who's getting that shit? My parents, for sure. Spaghetti and meatballs all around. My parents will still hit like, I went to Karabas or we went to Bonefish Grill or chicken, chicky, front funhouse.

Bonefish fucking beat it, I'll tell you that. I hate those casual- Chains, but they're like knife, they think they're hip chains. Dude, you're an Applebee's, give me some chicken fingers and fries and a Jack Daniels burger and zip it. Okay, how many football games you got on at the same time? You're trash. Yeah, I remember they were like,

oh, I heard this, I went to the Bonefish Grill, Bonefish Grill, went to the Bonefish Grill. I thought it was like a fucking Michelin star restaurant. I didn't, I never knew anything about it. And then I said, then I come to find out it's a fucking Applebee's with a little bit of polish on it. The ones back in the day though had a little bit of class because there wasn't that many of them.

Like, I don't know if you've ever been to a place known by the name of Hula Hands. You've ever been to a Hula Hands? Listen, you talked to one Dan Ryan in a Hula Hands in the mid-90s. It was fucking wild. Man, they used to do fried stuffed mushrooms. Oh, dude, they were-

I don't know what was in that, cream cheese and crab meat or something. They were putting sawdust or something in that oil that fucking make those extra crispy, dude, because anything fried in the 90s had a fucking coat of lacquer on it for sure. I was, we used to go to this place, Georgians in the Northeast Philadelphia.

Oh, that sounds real trash. Smoking section in Georgians, I was the fucking prince, okay? If my dad was the king, I was the prince of Georgians. I was, hey, they knew what they knew. I liked my crayons when I got there, color on the place. You remember blatant being in the smoking section with your parents?

I can't really remember actually my parents smoking at the table in the restaurant. I mean, we used to go in, my dad would drop us off, run in and see what the weight is. We'd go in, hey, we got five, smoking or not. That's trashy too. Smoking. He would drop you off to run in and see-

Well, he had to park or whatever, you know, yeah. Oh, we'll go in and run in the table. You're talking to a hostess? How old are you? I like doing shit. I like having a job. I wanted to be an old man when I was a kid. I was doing shutdowns and fucking hitting on cops.

Hey, Debbie, how are you? Good to see you. My dad's just parking the car. You got room for three and smoking? We got to make it quick. We got a shutdown at the Ramada. Let's go. I got a little league game at three.

Put the apps in now. You know how I like them, extra crispy. You had no smoking section all day. And they would say like, what do you want? Like first available? And we would say, we would bypass first available because you wanted to fucking burnies at the table. We never sat in non-smoking.

It was smoking all day. Breakfast too? I mean, we only, we were doing diners. So yeah, you can crank burnies at a diner. I still do that at some diners. Putting the cigarette out in the plate. Remember that? Yeah, we never did that.

We weren't fucking animals. I remember seeing a couple of sigs and smashed into a couple of pancakes. I was a big counter guy though. Me and my dad loved the counter. Counter was for the fucking weirdo, fucking mental patients. I wonder what the official RU garbage ruling on that would be.

I'm putting my foot down. You get a booth, you get a table. Really? See, I like to counter stretch it out, meet the civilians. No, you gotta deal with the guy coming in and get takeout, it's gold. You don't sit by the registry, you move down.

Regardless, they come to the counter. Get a nice spot in front of the Danish's, see what's good. No. Couple of lonely fucking boxes of tiny Cheerios and stuff. No way. I was always bullshit too. You ordered a fucking bowl of cereal at a diner.

They gave me the little box. I'm like, what's this, a fucking appetizer? An hors d'oeuvre? Get me the big box of Special K, let's go. Put it, leave the bottle. Put it on the table. That is fucking trash. If you're ordering cereal at a fucking diner,

get out of my face. I did it. A bunch of Thai rice, you're getting the fucking screw. Because they never got nothing good. You're getting the screw job. It's either Cheerios, Wheaties, or Rice Krispies. That's it. Or Pops.

No, Frosted Flakes they had. I don't know where you were going. We had Apple Jacks, it was because they used to buy the box of 10 of the little boxes. Is this Georgine's? Is that what we're talking about? No, this was a suburban diner on the street road in Busselton.

Shout out to the Burb. Go to the Burb, stretch my legs. I was getting a look at it yourself when you say it. This kippy's pretty hot. Dude, love to fucking, love the good dinedine. Oh, of course, forget about it. All right, what else you got, hit me. Well, I don't think good about diners too.

When you're in your teens, was in the Vesta Bule, or the front lobby, they all had sig machines so you could go get burnies underage. Yeah. But you had to have like eight dollars and quarters. I remember smokes being like 225. I remember that too when we were buying them, when we were having people buy them out front,

but then they jumped up to like, when I was in high school, they were like 525 or something like that. Yeah. That's not bad. Nah, five-spot catch you a pack of burnies. Were you the kind of family that would buy a carton? Would you buy a carton? No, my dad would never, no, no, no, no, no.

Really? Never, not once. Huh, now buy a carton of smokes, put it in the fridge, or in the freezer? No, not once. You never had a couple packs of Marble Lights in your freezer, next to some old chicken. Come on, it's me. I was a king chicken kind of guy. No, I never did it.

I mean, we would buy like a pack of, maybe buy a carton if we were going down the shore because they were more expensive down the shore. And like, you don't want to be like running to the fucking store every day. You wouldn't have fresh packs at the crib. So you know, maybe you split a carton or something. You know, if you were going down for a week,

you and your body would keep your head straight, you know what I mean? A little bit of reserves at the crib. If you got a carton though, you're smoking them. Oh, yeah. Sitting outside, couple of crabs, couple of Coors Lights, couple of Marbeezies. Call it a fucking day, son.

Good night. Yeah. Oh, that was from Matt. This was from Johnson. Thank you, Matt. Johnson, my office now. Did you or any of your family, this is looking back. I can't believe this never registered

on my fucking Garbagio radar. Check out podcastmarch.com, Garbagio t-shirts. Check them out. Two days left. Did you or any of your family members display their DVD or VHS collections in the living room? Like you walk in and they got like the tower or whatever. We never had enough of them.

To really get a nice. Got one thing of runaway bride and one disc of the Titanic. Yeah, they were always stored somewhere. Cause you know what we were big on growing up? The entertainment center. Dude, an entertainment center in the ninth cabinet. Dude, I have one that was bigger than this fucking studio

with like a 27 inch TV in the middle of it. The shelves would always be falling off. One shelf would lose like the thing on the side. So it'd be slouching in the back. All the fucking VHS tapes would fucking fall over and go into the back here and they're digging around with the fucking stereo wire, trying to get the surround sound right.

Oh my God, the fucking entertainment center. Trash. Dude, we had one. I mean, we had, we had like the standard like Godfather like fucking, I don't know, the nineties hits like God Titanic, you know, we had a fucking unnecessary roughness. Remember that movie?

That was a fucking flick unnecessary roughness. That'll take you back. More of a replacements family. Shane Falco, dude, shout out to Shane fucking Falco. That was Keanu, right? Oh yeah. Pain Heels Chick, dude, you want to talk about a fucking class act,

the speech in the middle at the end of that movie and the hot out. Who's that, Hackman? That's a Hackman. Yeah. That's also your stage name. That's what the H stands for, Hackman Foley. Pain Heels, Chick Stig Scars, glory lasts forever. Now, if that doesn't chub you up to go take someone out, I don't know what will.

Those are the words you live by? Yeah. Get a tatted on the back. Say that in the mirror as you walk out of the apartment in the morning. Yeah. But if you ever, I remember going to like, that was the thing you'd be jealous of. You go and be like, oh, fucking, you know, Justin's got 57 DVDs and the things, you know,

they would have the stack as tall as you and you're like, what the fuck? I'm like, you got fucking that seven grand in DVDs. I noticed more peers would have that. Like, you know, maybe in my 20s or the, you know, early 30s, people that had like their first apartment would have the DVDs all set up. But like, you think you're like, bro, that's trash.

You're going, look at that. That's a, that's a fucking, you know, that's a design statement. The CD display. Yeah. Same shit. Garbage. Yeah. Bad news.

Dude, our fucking, we had our entertainment center looking back was so fucking trashy. Give a fish tank in there. No. If you had the cabinet where they closed on the TV and then you could open it. Yeah. Who are you fooling?

I don't get it. What do we think? What do you think you're having a part? Like a fucking, you know, a Gatsby party and you got to hide the fucking, I don't understand it. I don't know either. Why, why, why does the TV need a door? Let's see.

Was your dad ever the drunk baseball coach or was he ever your baseball coach? Drunk. Your dad was fucking licking it up, fucking teaching kids how to fucking take a grounder. He wasn't, but he was a little bit of a hot head yelling at the kid sometimes. This is shout out to John.

My dad, he never, I don't think my dad ever coached us, but he coached a younger team in the same league that we played in. Like a mold. They won the championship one year. He was all proud. Dodger blue. Shout out.

That's so trashy, dude. You're like proud of your little league teams of fucking accomplishments. I'll tell you what, shout out to Wilkesbury, Pennsylvania. They had a fucking little league system that was like fucking semi pro. We had a fucking stadium. We had the snack bar.

We had the fucking local bozo up top, calling the games, fucking real nice. We had, we- Fully, strikes out again. Mom still looks pretty good though. Dude, we had sponsors- That's his mother smoking in the outfield. That's his dad at the snack bar.

That was where I first discovered the gummy bear. And fell in love with shitty pizza. By the way, was there anything better going to get a fuck? I'd go hit up my fucking, my dad for like a five spot. And hit the snack bar? Dude, get like a blue slushy. That, they do, those are unregulated. Those aren't ICs.

Those are fucking whatever the guy wanted to dump in it that morning. Those things will fucking, you can feel the tang in your jowls. Gatorade slurpee, oh, buddy. A fucking blue razz slurpee, a soft pretzzy. And dude, the hot dogs had about a fucking centimeter of grease on the outside of them.

I was asking my buddy's kid who plays a little league. Moving on. They got tryouts coming up. You think I can walk on? Trying to get back into it. I red shirted my, I red shirted my fifth grade. Yeah, I don't know if you know that. I do still have two years of college eligibility left.

If anybody wants to pick me up. Too bad you can't read. I know times are tough out there. Jesus. No, fucking, what the fuck was I saying? Oh yeah, I was asking them, do you guys go out after the games for pizza? His Hooters or something.

Yeah, you guys go, you guys go see some big teddy horse. Couple of chili wings and some knockers. No, if they ever got pizza or had, if they, because every game you went out for pizza after the games when I was a kid or you got a couple pies from the, starting to, starting to see a pattern here. Is that why you always want to get a pie after this? No, but he said they don't do that shit anymore.

No, it wouldn't go every game. Maybe it was a Friday night game or what? It was never every fun. We were on the coach would take you out to like a pizza shop. You all had your cleats on. That wasn't every game. That wasn't every game. Yeah, maybe not.

Coach a fucking millionaire is fucking buying 25 kids lunch every day. I tell you what, we were 12 fucking winners. So yeah, I think we probably did go out. Okay, okay, okay. The big party at the end of the year was that top dog. Was like a hot dog arcade fucking classy table service. Not that Chuck E. Cheese bullshit.

Dude, we used to go to a fucking private sports dome or all store sports or sports, sports land. As a kid. Dude, they had those remote control car tracks where you would get, you'd each get like a purple car, right? And you'd have the gun and you do this thing was, I mean, it had to be, there was two in like a big room and it would fucking whip it.

It was the whole whip around the whole room up on under an overpass. Buddy, if you think I wasn't fucking rubbing, I felt, you don't think I was trading paint like I was fucking Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Stewart. Isn't that his name? Tony Stewart, Tony Stark.

Tony Stark. Jimmy Stewart, was he a rock guy? I don't know. If you got a private room, it's fucking some shit hole like that. I know it was fucking great that it was fucked. Dude, if you had there or shout out to, we had an arcade TNT amusements.

Shout out to TNT. Sounds like a fucking prostitution ring. C and C amusements. No, TNT. TNT amusements was like a warehouse kind of, it was in an industrial park and he sold video games, right? So, but while he was had this whole thing of video games,

he set up a big room and it just had all these video games you could just go and play. So you could have your birthday there and it was like on free play. Everything was on free play for two hours. So like 25 kids, you could just run around like a huge arcade, play for free. And they fucking served some nice fucking zah there too,

dude, a nice, nice pieces of zah. But the thing about those parties too, they always fucking skimped you on the coke. You get like the fucking eight ounce clear glass and then they pour like fucking four ounces of coke in there. I'm like, yo, I'm a bite and sip fucking kind of guy that just dropped the three liter off and hit the brick. Now, we were all pitchers.

Ask for pitchers. Oh, pitchers. A pitcher of soda fucking packed with ice. This is a good night and goodbye. Do you order, do you ever order a drink with no ice? Are you talking to me? Yeah, do you do that? We're friends, right?

Yeah. You fucking come on here, you're treating me like a fucking jerk off? No ice. I have to fucking tell the girl at the movies because so many fucking cheap wads go in there saying no ice. I'm like, listen, I want tons of ice. Don't fucking be shy with the ice.

Load it up to the point that you're like, there's no way this fat guy wants this much ice. I want a little bit more. Fucking Mel Brooks, relax, Carl Reiner, whatever it was. Don't think you're slipping that one by me. Shut up to Carl Reiner, I love you. Rest in peace, big man. Rest in peace.

Dude, if you're, listen, listeners out there, there's a lot of you. That's the European shit. If you order a fucking Coca-Cola product, a cola, anything without ice, and you say no ice, you're a, stop listening right now, you're a fucking jerk off. It's comedy shit right there.

I want more soda. This is fucking America, what? See, put it, get out of here with you. I want more soda. I go to Taco Bell, order a $5 box. Then you order two drinks. Taco Bell, you fucking moron, you're pouring your own soda, you load up.

Yeah. I'm leaving. You fucking chug one, go for it. Oh my God. This guy stinks. You're telling me, you're fucking, do that, dude. I'll go into fucking Chipotle and ask for a water cup and fucking be in there like I'm Willy Wonka.

Are you kidding me? It's stuck in the pipes. You take, what, no, it's not worth no ice. What's the point of having a soda if it's not gonna have fucking ice in it? You go in there, you load up on ice, you fucking crush one real quick. They don't care, it's Taco Bell.

Dude, if you're not taking a little nip off the top, they kill the bubbles, you're a fucking jerk off. Yeah, everything, slurpees, fucking, you always fucking crush one. A little headstache, you know what I mean? Yeah. Get your mind right, take the edge off. I don't even like to feel of a cup with no ice in it.

No, it's all wonky. Yeah, it feels off. It's gonna send her gravities off. Feel like I'm in the upside down, I don't know what's happening. Dillon, losing points on that one. Dude, you need it. Garbage.

Yeah, dude, no ice is a fucking jerk off. I understand some people maybe have some dental work or whatever. Then you shouldn't be drinking coke. I can't relate to it. You should get a water, a bottle of water like a fucking gentleman. If you're getting a cup of water, be a fucking gentleman

and get a bottle of water. Buy a bottle, you don't fill up the fucking water cup nine times, they give you the little courtesy cup. What are we doing here? I stopped in to the girls out on our 30th, having to get my eyebrows done yesterday. I don't know if you guys can see them, but they're fucking hooked up, hooked up.

Kids looking crisp, gotta give it to them. Buddy, you can fucking cut steak on these fucking eyebrows. I know, you say that all the time, I don't know what that means. They're sharp, cut steak with it. Okay, you say on it though. You cut steak on a cutting board, that's not sharp. Cut steak with it.

I don't know, what am I, a fucking trial here? What are you, a rapper? Cut steak with it. Cut steak with it. Anywho, there was some douchebag in there with his girlfriend getting a petty. And listen, this animal goes, I can hear him talking, he's fucking sounding like a jerk off.

All of a sudden he goes to the girl doing my eyebrows and he goes, excuse me, do you have a cup of water? A cup of water? Like first of all, you're drinking fucking nail salon water? Yeah, whatever cup they rinse out for you. I don't got a cup of water here, this is weird, I need ice. It's weird, I feel like I'm at the dentist office or something.

Well, I'll say this. Get me a little ice. Got to fucking gas digital, they do it nice. They do it nice, ice cold. If it's ice cold, that's one thing. Of course. And that's water you're drinking it now. But if you had a can of soda and poured that in there

with no ice and had a straw in it, we probably wouldn't be doing this podcast anymore. No, the way the straw floats in there, you got to keep the ice to keep it balanced. Yeah. Yeah, it's trash. So knock that shit off. This is a fucking ice family over here.

That's right. Europeans do no ice, my wife does it. She'd be like, no ice or, you know, I'm like, no ice. What are we doing here? Drinks water warm? I'm like, what the fuck, what's going on here? All right, Dil, is there anything in the chat? Anything worth noting in the chat?

We're going to wrap up here. I think we got one or two more. Yeah, someone was asking. I don't know if you saw this one. Let me see. Have you ever eaten soup straight from the can? What the fuck? Has it been heated up?

No, we're all dogging in. Let me just double check. Have you ever? I'm a big chunky guy, but I can't eat a cold. I could maybe see him, he heated up in the pan, pour it back into the can, they eat it. What? So if you don't want to feel like washing a dish,

not that I would do that. You just eat it out of the pan, you're already in it. Oh yeah, I'm a big eater out of the pan guy. I love eating it out of the pan. I really like to thank you for a fine china, gentlemen. I'm not fucking doing another dish. No, that's fucking nasty. There were fucking cold beans out of the can.

What is this, the fucking New Deal? Come on, fucking Roosevelt, get out of here. Who's doing that? Yeah, that's tough. You got to heat it up a little bit, stir it around, get the fucking, get the dust out. If it's in a can, you got to heat it up. You got to.

Every time I dump a can of soup, I always feel like I'm going to find a finger or something floating in there. I don't know why. That's a warning. Yeah. Anymore lip out of you, you fucked. I just, it irks me.

It irks me. I always feel like you're going to, you know, like a lug nut or something in there. Looking for a suit, you know what I mean? Get my payday. If that ever happened to you, would you be somebody that would like post it? If you ever found like a fried rat or something like that

or like a fried mice paw in your, in your like onion rings or something, would you be, would you call the place up or would you just keep it moving? You don't want to be known as that. I don't want to be. Kevin Ryan, he won a 250,000 lawsuit against Taco Bell because he found a fucking frog leg in his burrito.

You don't want to be that guy. First of all, you're getting a burrito with that Taco Bell. You're a jerk off, but yeah. Cheesy burritos. Who, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Cheesy, yeah. A cheesy burrito from Taco Bell is the epitome of class. I will argue that all day.

No, Taco Bell. Thank you, Keanu. Yeah, right? Jesus Christ. Wait, man. No way. Taco Bell's trash. No, stop.

We're not ending the podcast like this. Stop. Okay, well, we'll talk about it. Taco Bell's not trash. Thank you, fully. Dude, a fucking chalupa. In the hierarchy of. Of what?

What are you, what are you, well, it's like. What, wait, hold on. I'm also not bothering you with my line of questioning. You fucking asshole. No, in fast food, where does it fall? It's not top three, not even top five. It's a niche. It's a niche thing.

What do you mean? It's for special occasions, like anniversaries and stuff like that. It's not top five. You know it's not top five. It's not gonna compare with like burger places like Wendy's McDonald's, fucking Burger King. Chick-fil-A.

I put it above Chick-fil-A. Cut the podcast. I'm a Popeye's man. That's it, Bobby, cut it. Yeah, you're nuts. It's not, no, no way, no way. I'm not saying I haven't fucking dabbled. I'm just saying, it ain't good.

You're never like, oh, that was, I feel great. We're gonna have to shelf this conversation for another time. Sure. And we wanna thank everybody out there because we had, just for the record, we had some, you know, I guess, had to cancel the last second.

It happened sometimes, but we weren't gonna hold you guys up with the live chat and all that kind of stuff. So we just did a Uncle Hank and a Kippy. And we appreciate you guys rolling with the punches with us. Kippy, what do you got? Yeah, guys, as always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes,

full video available on YouTube. You can subscribe there. Just get those numbers up. We're almost at 5,000 subscribers, which is fucking awesome. Yes. Also, if you wanna join the live chat or you get the, you know, the episodes early

or the HD live stream, HD video, you can sign up at gasdigitalnetwork.com, use promo code AYG. I believe you get a free trial. You save a couple of bucks a month. We get to wet our beaks. It's a fucking win-win. Even if you don't wanna do it

and you still wanna find a way to support the show, it's an easy way to support the show. Me and Fully get a couple of shekels in our pockets at the end of the day. It's fun, so we appreciate it. We had a bunch of people sign up our first month here, so we really appreciate that. Also too, guys, I cannot stress enough.

The t-shirts, they're available for two or three more days. You're gonna miss them. If you don't get a clean living or a garbaggio t-shirt, you're gonna be mad. I know what's gonna happen because people are gonna hit me up on fucking, on Monday going, oh, the link's not working. It says not available.

Yeah, buddy, we're stick and move. Stick and move. We gotta stay one step ahead of the law here, folks. And also, I don't know how else to tell you they're available. We're telling you on the podcast, we're telling you on every social media, they're there, just go get them.

That's it. And not so it's all bad news or negative reinforcement. We appreciate everybody who bought one. I fucking love it. The fact that so many people have bought them already is fucking phenomenal. It's so fucking awesome, guys.

The support you guys have given us so far has been fucking outstanding. And I, you know, I can't show our appreciation enough. Yes, the shirt's not doing wonders for my titties, I'll tell you. Yeah, it's the shirt. Oh, oh, oh, oh. There's taco belt.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Gang, we will see you guys next week. We love yous. Peace!