Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Dusty Slay Returns!

Episode Date: August 4, 2025

Are You Garbage presents stand up comedian and podcast host Dusty Slay! We're picking up right where we left off last episode! You know Dusty Slay from Stand Up Comedy, The Tonight Show, Nateland w/ Nate Bargatze, Ted Talk, Somethings Burning w/ Bert Kreischer, We're Having a Good Time Podcast, and his specials "It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere", "Being Poor in the Trailer Parks" and "Wet Heat" and so much more! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG 2025 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: Better Help: Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/GARBAGE True Classic: Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/GARBAGE Liquid I.V: Savor the last bits of summer with Liquid I.V. Tear. Pour. Live More. Go to https://LIQUIDIV.com and get 20% off your first order with code GARBAGE at checkout. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage? Oh yeah. It's that little show we sit there with your favorite comedians and we find that it's a good to be classy Yeah, but they're just a big old piece of trash trash trash I'm your host a truly coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Tootie's in the new edition

X-rays came back negative. Okay, it's only meniscus damage in her left knee It tooty will be ready for the start of the NFL season I can't wait is good for her my coach is coming at you from right next to me He is the CEO of are you garbage? He's an international businessman and my best pal in the whole wide world and I worked with that tootie for like two hours I didn't even like it give it up for KJ Kevin James Ryan everybody. What up gang shout out to you Thanks for tuning in as always She's make sure you review subscribe on iTunes full video YouTube. Also, full video available over there on Spotify.

And I gotta be on our climbing the charts over there on Spotify. We're coming for that number one spot. Then obviously the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com slash rdgarbage. Just past 15,000 Patreons over there. Go check it out, gang. Yes, sir. And gang, we couldn't be more excited.

We are incredibly, and I mean incredibly special guests, back with us again today. We only got to the age of 19. Yeah, that's the level of garbage we're dealing with. He is in the running for the king of garbage. He's been talked about almost every episode since he's been here. Sure. He's got a brand new special out on Netflix right now. Wet Heat, do yourself a favor and give it up for Mr. Dusty Slay. The king is back.

Well, I'm so pumped to be here. This is the best podcast I've ever done. And people really liked it. And I was like, how how would I ever do another episode? I almost was like, I'm afraid to do another episode because

people would be like, oh, he was garbage in his early life, but he couldn't keep it going. I mean, listen, after 19, did you end up going to Be like, oh he was garbage in his early life, but he couldn't keep it going After 19 did you end up going to the Sorbonne or Oxford or something like that? No, no, no, no, I kept it going Buddy how are you congrats on the special? Thank you. I'm doing great. How much what's this number of this Netflix special your second your third? It's my second Netflix special, but I do have a half hour that I did before. Right. Okay. And then I also have an hour on YouTube. So you know, it could be cranking out material. Killing it, man.

Guys, guys stands and delivers material. I love it. It's about a 70 minute special. And then this guy I saw a comment. Of course, I'm bragging over here. I like 22 minutes. I find the negative comment. This guy oh yeah he did two old jokes and they had to be like and I know one of them but it's a new setup for sure I was like I can do this it was on my Netflix half-hour but I was like I could do this and it'll help get into

this other thing but it's like 30 seconds of old jokes and it's 70 minutes I could have just done 60 16 a half right it's like don't be upset about that 30 seconds you're really that's how you rework stuff you find out this is a guy this is a guy who doesn't have material for our new tour. It's hard writing material. No, I got fresh hand, fresh stuff in my pocket right now. And it's not old, it's certified pre-owned, right? And it's also like the half hour, I felt like I didn't know if people really saw it. Sure, listen, so I want them to see it.

It's one guy. Yeah. Get out of here. And he deleted his comment. Man, you are. I did comment. I get on there. I get into the comments. You're in it deep. I can't help it. Might have had something to do with you swatting his comments. Man, you are. I did comment. I get on there.

I get into the comments. You're in it deep. I can't help it. Might have had something to do with you swatting his house. Hey, that's so funny now, huh? Alright, let's get back into it. Alright, last we left you, you were 19. You had signed up for the army and then got immediately released because of a little smoke and doobage, I think is what it was. Yeah. Well, I got

arrested for I was had weed and alcohol in the car. Okay. I was drinking in the car, but I wasn't. Listen, I was ready to join the army. I was like, I was committed to that. I was running. I quit smoking cigarettes. I was ready. My recruiter was like, hey, you're about to join. You're about to go in. You're about to get shipped off. And he's like, I quit smoking cigarettes, I was ready. My recruiter was like, Hey, you're about to join you about to go in you about to get shipped off. And he's like, I know you like to smoke weed. So he's like, if you're gonna do it, do it tonight, because you'll get shipped off in 30 days, and

you'll get another drug test. So that's a crazy thing for a recruit. Yeah, he did say I shouldn't say. Fair enough. All good ideas. Listen, between me and you okay fucked up there And then I so I went hung out with some buddies, and then we were gonna go meet these girls That I'd never met. I don't country song. Yeah, I was some buddies meet some girls I don't even know that was definitely an open field Yeah, I don't even know if they were real because I didn't know them prior Uh-huh, and I never made it to their never met them and it never we never followed up. You know

Good old days. It was just like a group. There's a group of girls at the next school Yeah, they may or may not have existed. Yeah, and you know we were on our way out the door a buddy goes Hey, I got it. You guys want these beers. He goes. I'm not gonna drink up So me and my friend, we took the two. All we had to do was not open them. You know, there was no reason. It was two beers, two beers, one for me, one for him. Gentlemen, you think the army would want a kid like that?

This guy fucking parties. He's ready to go. You would think. Yeah, I don't know about that. But on the on the way, we open them. And there was, you know know again. We could have just Because I thought well, this will be cool. You know we're To the girls house. We're trying to get out of the car. Look at us. We've been drinking That is pretty cool. I got to just join the army. What's up? Yeah, I think so ship it out tomorrow But you know, but we get pulled over because I'm on the interstate and there's a and my exit is next

Yeah My exit is next and the cops there and he's going real slow and I'm like What do I do? Do I go? Let's go driving and I pull up behind him and I'm like do I hit the lights? I'm like do I pass him? I'm like do I pass him? Spears get immediately get off or do I drive behind him real slow? Uh-huh kind of did both I drove behind him real slow, and then I go I can't do this so then I went around You idiot I know and then when I got off cops don't like it when you passed them But I was like he's going too slow. It seems suspicious to ride behind him.

I do get that too though. Yeah. This is entrapment. Yeah. This is a setup. Plus you're high and drunk. Right. Losing my buzz here, props.

Right, if I'm sober, yeah, you just go right around. Yeah. It's not weird. You risk the ticket. Uh-huh. You just drove in the middle lane real slow with your lights on, high beams on? But I had the idea.

Somebody told me one time that if you're ever, if a cop's following you, just pull over and then take the keys out of the ignition. And then you're like, I'm not driving. That's dirt bag logic, though. Yeah, that doesn't work. I don't know if it's true, but that's what someone told me.

How did you get here, sir? I don't recall. Yeah, exactly. But that's what they say. And- Just sitting there eating your keys And I did use this a couple of times later in life, but this time I said you know what no no I'm just gonna keep going and then I got pulled over so you did he pull you off did he exit with you He exited with me and pulled me over fucked and then I I just had these two open beer bottles

So I'm like well I could leave it here and just let him see it, or I could stuff it under the seat, let it spill out, and him smell it. And that's what I did. I stuffed it under the seat. I respect that. And then my friend had weed in his pocket,

and he stuffed it in his beer bottle. So then it became mine, because it's in my car now. He couldn't jump on that charge for you? No. Actually, his dad confronted me later wanting me to take the charge for both. Whoa. Because his son had been in trouble with me a couple of times.

You're a bad apple. But it was. Dusty's a bad seed. But it was him getting me in trouble. OK. This time? Both times. Oh, really?

Yeah, I had a party at my house once. This guy... Sounds like you're the... sounds like... It's your party at your house, Dost. I don't know how to break that deal. You're the bad guy. So what time I kidnap this lady? Alright. Stay with me. Yeah this guy and then a guy showed up that everybody was a little annoyed with. This is at the trailer? This was at my mom's house. House? We moved out when I was 15 out of the trailer into a into a house just in time to get a driver's license So I didn't have to have lot eight Moore's trailer park on my driver's license

Sure, I remember that yeah, which was good for me, but really good for me But got me in the harbor But you know so I had a party in this guy showed up that everybody was a little annoyed with. So my buddy who was with me in the car went over smacks this guy and then the guy leaves and I think he called the police. What a dick. Yeah. So anyway, so the place got raided. Yeah. And then the cops came. How old are you at this time with the party? 17. And what'd they do? Well, they just came and busted the party and it was cool. There

were some out of town girls there. It was going to be, it was going to be a great night. It was going to be a good party. Yeah. It was like one of the best. I feel like the South has a lot of out of town girls. Out of town girls. It was going to be, it was going to be a good one.

They made the drive-al. They got on the interstate. Yeah. The whole night. Officer, we got out of town broads here. I got out of town trim on the way Jamming me up They were and the cops were there and other back at see other people about to pull in And realizing the cops are that was like this was gonna get so good. Yeah, and then I got arrested

Well, I didn't know I didn't get arrested the cops just called my my So my mom came home with her boyfriend, who was also drunk. Hold on, your mom wasn't away? My mom, she was at her boyfriend's house. You threw a party when your mom was in town? She would be gone for days at a time. OK, so she was over there, she stays over.

That's out of town trim right there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we're all doing it. We're all doing it. Cut some out of town broads line though. Her boyfriend calls you up. I got out of town girls over here. You're fucking me up there.

Okay, that makes sense. That's funny. Because you know. Sorry, I do have to say I apologize for referring to your mom as Trim. I had to take this away. No, that's funny though. But you realize that you don't throw a party at your house unless unless your parents or mom is out of town. She's just over at her boyfriend's house.

Yeah. I mean, she's staying there, probably. It was technically a different town. Yeah. Right. I'm with Dusty on this one. You know, she's not on vacation. I know. Come back if she forgot something. Yes. But at 17, that's the deal. I understand. You're taking that swing. Also, I don't think his mom's going to Turks and Caicos

for the next few weeks. You know what I mean? No, no. So that's out of town. She showed up when I was having parties. But she care a lot? She would not be happy that all these people were in the house, but usually everybody kept it cool.

And it wasn't like the house was so pristine that uh you know there was things did get broken but it was you know not that big of a deal but that's Rent-A-Center's problem. Call up Shaq. I'm only leasing this shit. Yeah I quit mega payments anytime. They come back and pick this up right away. I don't want it no more.

I like. Okay, so the cops break it up. They break it up. They well the part. Yeah. And then my friend who slapped the guy was in his car in the driveway out the window throw up on the side of his car. So he gets his parents called to Everybody else just has to go home.

Hmm. I had good old days. That's good. Just go home. Yeah. Get out of here. So it's his, you know, it's his fault. That's him. That got in trouble, you know? I mean, sure, I had the party.

Right. But handle yourself. Yeah, that's not, that's not on you. Yeah. That's not on you at all. But since that happened, the dad's kinda looking at you as the. Yeah.

So now it's me and that guy again in the car getting arrested. Mm hmm. And you got arrested this time. This time when I got pulled over, I did get arrested. Got open beers in the car. He opened beer. You remember what the beer was? Uh I don't remember. Okay. I would think it was a Bud Light. Sure. That was kind of the beer. Probably not an import. No. No. No. It wasn't a new cap. No. definitely not an import. I would have said no to the at that point. I would have said no. The hell is even that?

Yeah, boy, what are you doing drinking Hoeingart? That's an extra charge in this county. I'm gonna need to see your passport. Is that a fucking orange in your beer? So we never made it to the park to the girls. And then we ended up in jail local, you know, at my hometown. And then we ended up in jail, local, you know, in my hometown. And there was a guy in my cell who we knew some similar people.

And another guy. I was very defense attorney there. Yeah. We had known similar people. And then another guy down the way, we went to high school with, and he yelled to me. So it was fun. I mean, it was like, hey, you know, we're all,

it's a nice reunion here. And then, yeah, and then I called me. So it was fun. I mean, it was like, hey, you know, we're all it's a nice reunion. Right. And then, yeah, and then I called my brother in law, he came and bailed me out because he's the one guy that wouldn't tell on me. Now, I wrote a joke about this, that it was a he came to pick me up in a dump truck. He says it was a tow truck. I don't remember. But either way, he came and picked me up. I mean, I think the fact you're arguing over a tow truck or dump truck Yes

And and I always said that I you know, my nightmare was a five-year-old's dream I got to ride in a police car in a dump truck. Oh, that's a good bit. That's a good fit I don't care if you did that on a half hour That's all right. Yeah, I've reused that joke a few times. Yeah, how does your brother know have access to both a dump truck? Well, hey, that was the kind of work he did You know, he would you know, he had a full trade He had a lot of jobs where the weather determined whether he went to work. Okay. Okay a lot of road work, right? And I guess alright so at 19 that this is that you get busted. No not joining the army

So now the army recruiter comes to my I have to go in and tell them I go hey I got arrested so the army recruiter comes to my, I have to go in and tell them. I go, hey, I got arrested. So the army recruiter is like now trying to like figure out how to still get me in. Right. Can't get in with a DUI? Well, was it a DUI? No, it was underage consumption of alcohol and possession of marijuana. So I had those two things. So both misdemeanors. Yeah. I mean, I got youthful offender, which means it's not on my record. Nice. That sounds pretty religious. Useful. Useful. Sounds like a good name for a band. Yeah. Offender. Yeah. Good Christian. Probably is. Yeah. Yeah. But so and then the recruiter now is like trying to fit. He wants to, he's concocted a lie to, he said, I have a big family reunion

that I need to go to. So I need my ship off date moved because my court date comes after my ship off date. So I can't go. Okay. I could go in. This guy's a closer. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he came to my house and he was ringing the doorbell, knocking on the door.

And I was like, I'm just not gonna answer. And he stayed until I did. No shit. I don't think he was ever gonna leave. I would still be trapped in the house. He would still be ringing the I don't think he was ever gonna leave. I would still be trapped in the house He would still be ringing the doorbell. This guy was not gonna leave Closer I think it's hard to get recruits. Yeah This was pre 9-eleven too. I so I don't know but anyway, yeah, that was tough. My dad was a naval recruiter

He said the easiest time was right after Top Gun came out. Oh, yeah He said it was like signing up. He said he's got to put, grrr, after anything for you. I bet so. I mean, I was just trying to get out of my hometown, trying to get some college money. Some out of town girls. Yeah, exactly.

Out of country. I could go to them. They don't have to come to me. Yeah, you're an out of town guy. Yeah. And that's what I wanted to be, an out of town guy. I had never been an out of town guy. Yeah. And that's what I wanted to be an out of town guy. I had never been an out of town guy. Yeah, you know. But in so. So we he drove me to

the thing. They denied the request. So then I had to get a lawyer. And then I ended up getting nine months suspended license to several fines, community service. It seemed like a lot. Yeah. What was the community service? Yeah. I had to go pick up trash. No shit.

The guy was great, though. The trash guy. Yeah. He was like he like I did like half the time and he goes, oh, you're good. I just see. Yeah. I was 10 hours today. Yeah. Yeah. On the highway. Right. Yeah. And even then there were guys.

I mean, my town was not so small, but small enough. There were guys in jail on the bus that I knew. Hey man, what's up? Yeah. And they were trying to get me to bring them stuff. And I was like, listen, I'm not I'm on probation. I'm not trying to get in worse trouble. Like bring sandwiches or like bring stuff? Like gum. But I was like, if you're not allowed to have gum, I'm not bringing it. I'm not

going to bring it. That's a real good point. Gum? You can't have gum? You're jammed up if you can't have gum. I don't know what situation you're in where you can't get a stick of chew at any point. The state of Tennessee has said this can not happen. Yeah. Gang, this is an ad by any point. But the state of Tennessee has said this cannot happen. Yeah. Gang, this is an ad by BetterHelp. Yes.

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h e l p dot com slash garbage. Can't's talk about true classics. You see this piece of crap right here? Not a true classic. That's why it's itchy. That's why it's hugging up at my throat. That's why it doesn't hug the guns. And it's tight around my waist and I look like an absolute bozo. If I was smart, I would have grabbed the t-shirt right next to it, which is a true classic. But I didn't because I'm an idiot. And you don't want to be an idiot, so do yourself a favor, get over to True Classics, and get

the best t-shirts you're ever going to wear. And here's the other thing. What's that? Let me tell you this, pinhead. Okay. I don't know why you got beef with me, but sure. They got a whole bunch of stuff for that. It's not my fault you picked a bad shirt today.

You should have went True Climbing Town, you're True Classics for years, and you're doing bozo shirts. Ruin my whole day. You're even, which is ruining ruining my day the best t-shirts in the game true classics They also have tons of active wear so do yourself a favor go that website You know the rest yeah forget overpriced brands out skip the cheap throwaway stuff true classic is built for comfort But the last built to give back baby You can find them at Target Costco or head to true classicsics.com slash garbage and try them for yourself. Do it. So what's the living situation? Are you on your own? You with your parents? With your mom?

I'm still living with my mom. Still living at your mom. New house. New house. But after this and I'm it's a little fuzzy on the timeline. It could happen right before or after. But you all have beers in you. Yeah I bought the timeline. I got right before or after but I'll have beers in you Yeah, I bought the trailer that I grew up. I remember this Yeah for a thousand bucks and you and your boys were hanging out We all moved back there and then we did touch that and then that's where I lived until about 2003 This was all happening in 2000. Okay arrest and so I lived there till about 2003 and then I moved to Charleston, South Carolina So this is the left turn right here. You didn't go to the army. Didn't go to the army.

Had you thought about comedy? No, comedy never crossed my mind. Nice. I just was like I need to get out of here. Until I was thirty. I was like I gotta get out of here. I love my hometown. Actually, this past year I went back to my hometown. I got to be the grand marshal of the Christmas parade. Whoa.

And a key to the city. That's pretty good. Look at that. Did you tell us this last time? No, no, this has just happened. You got a key to the city? You might be the first guy that has a key to the city. Yeah.

Whoa. Small city. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Thank you. You're going for mayor or something. I should.

A key to the city. And even- Is it big? Well, it's a small key. Small small key, but it's in a case Yeah, do you ever see did you ever see the cop that pulled you over or no? I actually I worked at Office Depot after that and I did see that guy there. Well, this was in between move oral surgery What do you think? Well, I was delivering pizzas and then when I lost my license, I couldn't deliver pizza So I went to work at Office Depot, stocking shelves.

Nice. Is that a good gig? It is a good gig. I was getting high a lot. Air conditioned? Air conditioned. Inside? Inside and I started being the receiving manager,

but I wasn't the manager, I was just the receiver, I guess. And so I would go in at 6 a.m., unload the truck. So I was like, it was perfect because you can get really high at, you know, 530am and everybody just thinks you're sleepy. Ah, that's pretty good. So for two hours, the store's not open. I'm high unloading the truck bears whatever. Yeah. And you know, it was great. That's pretty good. So you see the cop? I see the cop. I don't do anything. But I do see.

I didn't think you were going to beat him up or anything. He was still in uniform. And I wanted to. He didn't recognize you? No. I mean, I guess he probably arrests a lot of people. He didn't seem like a very nice guy. He was a little overweight.

And I remember the guy saying to another, when he arrested me, he goes, fat guy's on a roll. So he was just you know, that guy's on a roll. I should be your motto Let me ask you this When you got when he busted you did you happen to say to him hey, I'm going into the army Yeah, I said you opened with that. Yeah, I said well, I'm going into the army. Yeah. I said, are you open with that? Yeah, I said, well, I'm going to the army for your freedom. And I'm, I'm scared this is going to mess me up. He said, this is going to mess you up or you're going to mess you up. Meaning this is your fault. You've you've you've

made your bed. I gotta say 2000. A cop young kid going in the army. If he wasn't a real dickhead, he would have done something to help you out. How you gonna believe this guy? He's got open beers and he's high. You can believe this guy? He could say anything to get out of this situation. I think he could have checked it out.

He could have checked it out. I'm glad he didn't. Yeah, no kidding. I would have been in boot camp, you know, when September 11th happened. So, and people, because I've talked about this before, some people have trashed me like, and I was like, I'm not trying to act like I was a,

you know, trying to be a hero. I really was going for free college. For the benefits. For money. Of course. I thought, I was real dumb. And I thought, who's gonna mess with America? You know what I mean?

I thought we're never. We're killing it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Who's gonna mess with what are they gonna do we'll never be at war again a Couple of years in Hawaii no big deal

I mean I worked with a guy at Papa John's and he told me how he was in the Navy and he told me how Fun it was and wait. He was in the Navy. He's back at Papa John You could have just bypassed the Navy and stayed at Papa John's. I wasn't connected a lot, you know? Plus, I picture you at boot camp, everybody with their head shaved, and you looking just like, you got the hat on. Yeah. What you yelling for, man? Yeah, I don't think it would have been good for me.

No, no, I think, yeah, of course, that's, uh, okay. So, Office Depot, then what was the what was the string of jobs? Well, from from Papa John's at office Depot were my only job until I left Opelika, which was my hometown. Right. And then 2003, 2003. Charles Charles and then I transferred with office Depot. Whoa, you got corporate involved. Do they pay for your move? No, no, they didn't pay for my move. And I was in Charleston, South and then I transferred with Office Depot. Whoa. You got corporate involved. Do they

pay for your move? No, no. They didn't pay for my move and there was no raise. Uh so, you know, my rent went way up. Yeah. I got no raise. Well, I was employee of the month. The second month I was there. Yeah. Yeah. The other office depot in

Opelika, they were threatening to fire me for insubordination, they said and I said to them, I don't even know what that means. And what were you doing? Well, getting high in the morning? Yeah, I mean, there was a the receiving manager position went away. And then I took that guy's job. And then that guy became a different manager. It was like he just was had it in for you. Yeah, he was all over the place, like calling me out for boxes. And I go, I know where everything's at here. Don't worry about it. I got my own system, Dale. You got the beds with the erasers, with the outlets.

This place is a mess. And I was like, I yelled at the guy. I can't find nothing. And then they took me into the office and they said that to me. We could fire you for insubordination. I go, I don't even know what that means. Speak Speak English please, okay? I'm about to join the Navy. And then I got my... You speak American here lady. My mom worked at the office depot too.

Wait, what? That is such a dirtbag thing. Your mom worked there? When multiple generations of a family work at the same place that's not a family business? Yeah. And she worked at the same store? Yeah. Who got who the job? She worked there first. OK. She got me the job. Uh-huh. And it's tough to get your mom a job.

Yeah. That's a tough look, if that was the other way. OK. She's good people, man. A guy yelled at my mom in there one day, a customer. Whoa. And my mom was crying in the break room. So I went out and I yelled at that guy.

Good for you. My manager was helping him put a chair in his trunk and i yelled at the guy There's always another layer for this yeah and then i and then the manager started yelling at me and i was like Oh, you wouldn't let, anybody talk to your mom that way and he was like, well my mom's dead and i was like What the fuck that's not the time to bring this up It's just my deal, Dustin And close this guy on an ergonomic chair. I got to say, though, your logic, from what I'm hearing,

is not wrong. You also have to add in small town manner. It's a small town behavior. In a small town, that is something that's acceptable. Sir, we don't yell at people's moms. My mom's dead. That's not my problem, Randy

I'm sorry for you. I'm real sorry about that man I apologize and then he fired me in the break room and then my mom had the authority to do that Yeah, he was the manager And then my mom my mom came back there was trying to cool it down I go well, he just fired me and then my mom starts crying again and then he hires me back. Hey Dusty, I apologize. I was heard about the mom coming.

10% raise two weeks vacation. I'm gonna go ahead and read and then the customer that I yelled at brought my mom flowers the next day. Whoa, see that's small town. I'm crying. That's so funny. All dude a lot went down in that break room. Yeah, I mean, these guys, I mean. That's

so funny. I get fired up. I mean, people are rude to my mom. I get really fired up. You can. I yelled at a guy at a movie theater one time. I forget exactly. I'm just gonna pick up your mom might be the problem. She could be. My mom was playing her music loud in the middle of the theater. But he, I don't know, it's like some usher guy or whatever. It was real rude to my mom. Yeah, it's crazy. There's no reason for you to be rude to my mom.

Man, you can't grill in here With you a hundred percent and that does create a bad situation Especially in customer service and it is yeah, you're right though. It's like if even if your mom's in the wrong you're like Yeah, of course, oh that's so funny, okay, so the move did sorry okay y'all know the move to Charleston Yeah, I moved. I just was ready to you know do something else. Well. Yeah, did you know anybody in Charleston? I moved with a friend. We wanted to move to Savannah, Georgia, right? Because Savannah had come to our Savannah. Savannah College of Art and Design had come to my high school. And I was like, this is cool. And it was really expensive. So I was never gonna go. But I thought it'd be cool to just be in Savannah. This is my logic. I'm with

you. And we went and visited. And my friend's dad lived in Charleston, which is two hours away. So we go, let's go visit his dad. And then his dad told him he could get him a job at the hospital. So that's good work if you can get it. Yeah, and we were like looking at the city.

And there were these girls selling Italian ice, which were very attractive. And I was like, this is enough for me. I can out of town girls. I got nothing nothing going in Savannah was that the first time you saw Italian ice too it was yeah I didn't yeah I didn't know what it was but I was like this is what I'm talking about it's cool it's refreshing they got frozen These Italians, Italians, what would they think of next? They're greasy and I don't trust them, but they're good, they know their way around a frozen tree. Italian ice, it's colorful, tastes sweet.

Dusty. A couple of hot bros, some water ice, and salty on a move. When you were supposed to move to Savannah But I loved it. I was like this is enough for me. Yeah That's great. I say this all the time. He'll get annoyed. Wow. I went there once over The Labor Day weekend spent a long weekend at Charleston It's a great spot on fucking believe what was that? What was the the dwelling that you moved? What was the living situation when you got there? Well me and my buddy we moved to

You know just a regular apartment Charleston proper outside outside of town figure called West Ashley is what it was called, okay? And still a Charleston address, but it's okay called West Ashley and we big on the addresses. Yeah You don't have much going on you really defined by what's on your license It is true though I like now I live in Nashville and it's in Davidson County and I moved to Hendersonville for a little while and I had a Different County on my tag and I didn't like I was like now I want to be want to be back Yeah, I got you. So I, you know, me and my buddy, he moved his girlfriend up right away.

This was not part of the plan. Me and my buddy had a whole plan. And then immediately he moves his girlfriend out. We're supposed to get them Italian, bro. And they're hanging out. And now I'm alone. I'm making no money. I moved from a town where I knew everybody to knowing nobody. I'm making no money. I moved from a town where I knew everybody

to knowing nobody, and I got no money, and I'm just hanging. Chilling. And me and my buddy, we lasted together maybe two months. Wow. And then I moved out. To where? Well, in the meantime, I took an improv class.

Okay, in Charleston. In Charleston, I was like, I need to improv class. Okay. In Charleston. In Charleston. I was like, I need to meet people. And you're working at? Office Depot in North Charleston. Everybody there's old. And I'm trying to get them to come drink with me. I just need a friend.

None of the old guys will drink with me. Sure. What's the car at this point getting you from A to B? I'm driving a 1999 Saturn It's not bad four-door dark blue gray bumpers. What year we talking 99 no year is 2003 Oh, that's pretty good really nice looking car. Okay stick shift. No power steering. I'm a real hard to drive Okay, but yeah, I mean, but yeah, none of these people will hang with me. So I'm I need friends So I took an improv class and one time a guy in the improv class stood up and said hey, I'm my roommate moved away

I need a roommate So I was like, oh, I'll move in and so I moved in with this guy and it was great. You like beers Yeah, yeah, and me and him did drink. You know, we had a great time and and then and he was a you know, he was Jewish. And at the time I never seen I had never met a Jewish person. Italians and Jewish guys you are. I had no idea. I never understood like I remember what your eyes look like Watching the movie school ties. I think with Brendan Fraser sure Fraser and they had that you know, I remember them making a lot like Jew jokes about him

I'm like, I don't understand what's happening here. Yeah, and I said, you know, but I moved it. I mean not the best first introduction to Judaism. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Or the movie Mississippi Burning. Remember that movie? That movie was filmed, all the downtown scenes were filmed in my dad's hometown. You met Gene Hackman. Oh, we mentioned that. You met somebody that did. RIP.

Yeah. Yeah. So, but yeah, I mean, it really played no role, but I just, it was significant to me. I'd never met a Jewish person and now we're like roommates. That's pretty good. Yeah. Culture. Move big city, moving up, you know, learning.

Yeah. He's from Ohio. I don't think I knew anybody from Ohio. I mean, it was... I did sleep a one eye open for the first month. It was all a big deal for me. And then I, you know, I started improv, and then I got a restaurant job. I eventually got a job working at Hymen Seafood.

Doing what there, though? I was a food runner. Okay. Big, big food scene in Charleston. Huge. I talk about it all the time. Huge. I took a resume in.

I made a resume, and I took him to all these restaurants in town. I got one place, I asked for a waiter job and they said, well, we're hiring cooks. And I go, all right, I'll take that. And they go, sounds like you want to be a waiter though. I don't know what we're doing here though. You're looking for a head of accounting. I smoke weed.

Change the jacket. It's cool. My roommate's Jewish. Yeah, I can get help if I need help. He's great with numbers. OK. So I took the job as a food runner with a promise to be a waiter, eventually. And I got a haircut.

I had long hair at the time. So I actually went, yeah, I got a haircut. But it wasn't necessary. The guy that hired me had long hair But then I met drinking buddies, uh-huh, and this is you know, I was more good about that Yeah, and drinking I was working downtown. I was doing improv So I was now meeting people that I could go drink with and this was really good for me This is really fun. I remember drinking and driving like the first time being like oh, I shouldn't be doing this You know and then I made it home

So the next time was a little easier and next time was a little easier. We don't condone that out there of course Yeah, well, it's so weird you talk to people now, and they're way against drinking it Oh, you see locked up for even saying that yeah, but you know and I'm not saying it's good No, and that I different time, but they don't even understand that Everyone was doing that yeah, that's what was going on out here. I'd yeah for sure I mean there's a there's a good chance that if you see construction workers in a van or a pickup truck four o'clock or you know four o'clock on a Friday There's a sixer rolling around in there. Oh, yeah I mean I remember working with a guy and we left work and he had a cooler and popped up in some beers in the

Car and I was like there was another guy with us who was like he got real nervous And I was like this is what I'm talking about This guy's my boss here. My boss is giving me a beer Yeah, and but so I really started to drink and get into it. And like, you know, I was like 21 when you're working in a restaurant. Jesus, we've made it two years. I know it's not in 40 minutes. Oh, yeah. Well, it's a good thing. No, it's a good. Well, I'm 21 now. And I'm like, I'm really getting into

it. And then I'm starting to, I'm not fitting in so well in Charles and I'm coming straight from a trailer park to this nice- What a more refined city, urban folk. I'm not really fitting in and I got deep seated insecurities that I feel like I've dealt with later in life. But at the time, I'd be drinking, I'd be having a good time.

And then I would think someone was judging me. And then I would like get mad at them. I would get, and I would get mad at them and I would start a fight, maybe not a physical fight, but a verbal altercation, many times. I would get kicked out of bars. I got... What is it like, what are you looking at?

Are you not better than me? Yeah, I'd be like, oh, this guy's got a problem here, huh? And then my friends would be like, I don't think so. I think he's just that's a Mike dick cutout. Yeah You sit in a problem looking in the mirror and you know, and I'm a Christian right and I Will slap but I would get into religious debates with people in the bar Sometimes when I was really drunk and I remember a guy like religious debates with people in the bar sometimes when I was really drunk. And I remember a guy like getting in my face about something at a bar one time. We were talking and then I took my hand and I shoved his face back. And he goes, that's real Christian like.

And then so I did it again and then I got kicked out. But then- So I nailed his hands to the wall. But so I mean, that's the kind of thing that I would just, you know, keep doing for a long time. Yeah. In Charleston. In Charleston. And I lived on Folly Beach for a while. I moved down to Folly. I lived downtown at a place called Sergeant Jasper, which was a big building

that I can now bike to Hyman's. OK. And then I knew the French Quarter, because that's all I really know. No. No. OK. Now more. I get it. You've been to Charles. I like it's all I really know. No. No? OK. No, more. I get it. You've been to Charles. I like it there. I'm sorry.

As he's talking now, I'm fantasizing about moving down there. You went to Slimans or whatever. It's great. It is great. Charleston's great. You ever go to Henry's? Henry's?

Yeah, I've been to Henry's. Have you ever had sheet crab soup down there? Yeah, Hymen's, we used to have sheet crab soup. See? Yeah. Told you it was real. Yeah. Yeah, it's a little made, have she crab soup. See? Yeah told you it was real. Yeah Yeah, it's a little made originally made from the egg row. Yes of crabs That's where it gets the she from and then they put a little sherry in there. Yes, they do. Yeah, that's all right

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then I, you know, I do happy hour. We'd get off work, you know, four, we'd go to happy hour. Have you been promoted to a server yet? Yeah, it's, it took about nine months, which was like people would come and you know when you get hired as a server you have to run food for three days and you have to host for three days. So people would come in and I would go, oh you're a new food runner? And they go, no I'm a server.

And so I was just getting bypassed because I was a good food runner. It's hard to find good food runners. So they wanted to keep you. They don't want to promote you. Because they're like, well, yeah, sure. That is dirtbag mentality. We get plenty of servers, but we don't get a lot of good food runners.

That's true. So I kept getting bypassed. Eventually, I made it in. And then you go to happy hour. I've wrecked a bike in the daytime many times. Like with a Nokia phone, I'll be on the phone, wreck the bike. The phone goes into a million pieces. You put it back together, call it back.

Yeah. Those things were indestructible. And then I moved to Folly Beach. So then I would now drink and drive a lot to Folly Beach. It is like you get off work, you go drink, and then you get in your car and go home. And there's no one to drive you because they're all drunk too.

Sure. There was no Uber, no Lyft. We did have a cab service, but you just had a number and you would call them and you don't know when they're coming. Yeah, all right. And they're never like overly kind. No, they're so rude.

Yeah, it's just because I'm dispatcher. Like, I'll be 45 minutes on yeah, and you're like well now I am screaming Bible verses Adam over the phone I got I did get beat up one time. I should have been beat up Regularly, yeah, but I had me too cuz I don't think I'm a fighter. You know, I'm just mouthy. I just really get a little lippy. Yeah. And especially when I'm drinking and I got, I got the three 16 says, I, I did, uh, I did yoga for the first time one day, one morning I got up and I did yoga for the first time at a, like a planet fitness or something down there in Charleston. Okay.

And then I, uh, went to work and worked my shift and then went to happy hour. And I was supposed to go on a date with a girl. She stood me up. So we had some sake at a sushi place. Man, that's a small town. He's got Jewish guys, people from Ohio, and sake. Is that the first time you had sake?

Probably so. Charleston was the first time I had had sake. My brother-in-law makes fun of me for saying that I didn't even know what Chinese food was when I was a kid but the so I put that together he says but I was a kid you know do you remember the first time you had Chinese food I don't remember huh but I do remember that you, I really discovered seafood working at Hymen. Right. Like I had only had salmon patties and tuna out of a can prior to. So when I saw my first tuna steak, I was like, you know, in my twenties, I was blown away. I was like, this is a full fish here. Yeah, I think I was too about about in my twenties. First time at a tuna steak. Yeah, late teens. Yeah. Yeah, and we would have salmon like crab cakes, but salmon

No, I gotcha and then I never really had seen up salmon fish. You ever mess with salmon fish? As opposed to a salmon moose Dan this one's in the water Um... Dan, this one's in the water! Uh... Did you mess with imitation crab meat ever? I don't think so. We weren't really doing crab stuff.

It's not butt stuff. My mom said my grandfather's favorite food was the salmon patty. Okay. So we would have that. What a weird origin. Happy loved him. Would you get him frozen? No, I guess you get salmon out of a can and then she would kind of. Oh, yeah. Gordon's frozen or something. You get hamburger, you released Ken. No, no. Gordon's frozen or something. No.

You get a hamburger, you diet red, pack it up. That's a land salmon we got there. No, no. My mom does a lot of things well, but she is not a cook. She is not a cook. Start some fights at office. Yeah. Startin' trouble again.

I'm in a break room, microwaving my salmon burgers. Okay. So, yeah. Drinking sake, girl staying job. in the break room, microwaving my salmon burger. So. Drinking sake, girls stay. Yeah. And then and then we go, you know, we end up at kind of a fratty bar up King Street. It was as far as you could go on King Street back then. Now it's like well expanded. I mean, it's become a real hotspot.

And we were dancing, dancing. She really angling for the key to the city of Charleston. Is that by the French Quarter by the beach? Was that by my hotel? And then- Fort Sumner, I know Fort Sumner too. Oh yeah, yeah. You ever hang out there?

Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, I did go out there. What, I saw some dolphins when I was out there. You could see them from the, it's great. I went out there. That's bad eating. That was so hot out there. Yeah, it's so hot was out there I could see them from the it's great I went out that's bad eating that was it was so hot out there yeah so I would have gave up in two seconds a wet heat they say yeah

so and then we ended up the kind of fratty bar we're dancing with some girls that we didn't know and guys got a no Your life is girls you don't know. How are you dancing? You know, the classic late 90s, early 2000s, grinding up on people that you don't know. Just bebop kind of swaying. Not good. Not a good dancer. And a guy confronted me. I yelled at him. A guy grabbed me from behind. People started kicking me. I yelled at him. A guy grabbed me from behind. People started kicking me.

And on the ground. The Yakuza? Who leads with kicks? I don't know. I was getting beat up. But then I got out of the bar, and I was mostly fine. I could have just gone home. But I saw two of the guys on the corner, and I thought, well,

I'll go confront them about this. And then they beat me up on the corner. You thought well I'll go confront them about this and then they beat me up on the corner. You showed them huh? Do you remember this whole process? Were you trying to try to get physical? You keep running your mouth and the two of you are going to kick my ass. Yeah no I don't know what I was doing I was just too drunk and I just my pride was hurt and I was like I'm gonna let them know and they and then so both of my eyes Were swollen shut no blood though. They didn't break the skin No, that's a weird goal post no broken bones. No messed up tea drive home

And then that one mostly by feel and then my boss that I was where I was also selling pesticides at the same time I was I had a job as a worker for a company selling pesticides Yeah, why you were waiting tables. Yeah, I was doing it was a seasonal job. He was running so I was yeah I was still running. I was doing seven days a week I was doing four days selling pesticides three days food running okay, and that's what I was doing in my cash Probably you're doing well. yeah was I was hustling it yeah I was doing what I had to do and selling the pesticides you have to go into an office went into Lowe's and Home Depot and we were like sales reps for the company and

my boss was a guy a guy named Stu Barber who used to play NFL with the Buffalo Bills way back and he was like he just passed but he was like late 60s when I worked with him and He I remember him pesticides. Yeah, he was like semi retired selling pesticides. I don't think they were making sure Yeah, I'm just sure you said I wasn't sure if you were on the bills at some point. No, no, no But I remember him making fun of me about it, about the black eyes he goes, I thought you Alabama guys could fight. And I was just like, well, I guess not. I mean, I don't know. I got I got beat up. But those two guys can fight better. Yeah. Yeah. Who knows where they were? Could have been Ohio. Yeah. Oh, but so I was living on

Folly Beach. And I remember I used the driving thing. I was in this gas station. I drove home from downtown, and I was at the gas station. I was just loud talking with the cashier the whole time. I thought I was the only guy in there. I'm just loud talking, you know, all throughout the store, just small talk, but, and then clearly drunk. And then I get to the register, and there's a cop standing there, and I go, oh, okay. And then I get to the register and there's a cop standing there and I go, oh, okay.

And then I kind of get it together. And then I go out and get in the car and the cop comes out and he goes, hey, you can't drive. And I go, yep, my keys aren't in the ignition, you know. Ah, they give away. I used that line. They weren't, but I go, you're right, you know. And then this guy was very nice.

I lived a block away and he helped me push my car into a parking spot and then drove me to my house. Oh that's nice. There you go. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. So that's Southern Hospitality.

That's some early 2000's stuff. Yeah. I don't think that's happening anymore. No I don't think so. And so. Hey you can't drive. Yeah so I said. Hey buddy I was just inside.

You are. Fucked up. I know officer. Yeah, so I said hey buddy. I just didn't sigh I know officer But another time this was uh I was at Halloween It was Halloween I was dressed up and I was you know there was this girl that I dressed up as well I don't like to say as I say I But I dressed up as kind of like a demon character, and I'm I live in a lot of shame about it

I don't like that. I did it Why that's okay? Source I don't condone this source, but I had dressed up as my Jewish roommate, but Don't tell my mama, but but we had Barry Everything mama but but we had red pay Barry my chest and everything guys it's me but I had red paint I painted myself up totally red you know and I wild swing yeah and it was a girl that I that I worked with that I kind of had a crush I had red paint. I painted myself up totally red, you know, and. That's a wild swing. Yeah. And there was a girl that I worked with that I kind of had a crush on, but she had

a boyfriend. And then she's dressed as like. Wait until she sees me in red. Well, she's dressed as like a school girl, you know, we were always kind of flirty. I felt like she had a thing for me, but she had a boyfriend. And then she tells me at the party that she, they broke up. That's prime time. Me and her just start broke up. That's so prime time. Me and her just start making out. And it is the best.

And she's wearing white and she has red paint. We come out of this room and like she has a red paint all over her face. And it was great. And then we decided, let's get out of here. But we were. But my roommate had drove. If we get home and wash this off But my roommate had drove. We get home and wash this off. Your roommate had drove. Right. So we had to get.

Is this still the Jewish guys? No, no, new roommate, total alcoholic roommate. He's my best drinking friend that I ever had. He would, if he could actually tell his story, he would do a great job on this podcast because he, you know, I don't want to call him garbage, but he would, he's been on this podcast because he, I don't wanna call him garbage, but he's been through some stuff. Gotcha.

And we just, I had not seen him in about 10 years and we just hung out when I was back in Charleston and I was like, wow, you have really been through it. Is he still boozing? Rehab, jail, he's still boozing. He likes to tell me I'm not drinking as much and he had four bourbon and cokes while we were hanging out. That's not that much. I'm not I'm not mad

at him. But when people are like, Yeah, I'm not really drinking that much. And you're like throwing them back. He pulled up with a mug of his own drink and had had a few you know, it's like, now you're still doing it. And it's okay. Of course, but you are still doing it. By definition. He told me that he got into making meth at some point and in a trailer like air conditioners you'll have this big vent system.

I don't know how to describe it but it's big. He said he thought the cops were coming to get him. So he took that off and got inside and hid in the vent system for a long time because the cops weren't coming. Sure. He was just in there waiting. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, so he's still doing it. So this is my, that's my roommate at the time and we're like the best drinking buddies. Also to go back on his scale, he's not really doing it then.

No, no. He's got more bourbon and coke so he's not hiding in the HVAC system. He's not cooking no more. He's not really doing it then. No, no. He's got more bourbon and coke, so he's not hiding in the HVAC. He's not cooking no more. He's not doing it. Right. He's not cooking no more. That's true. That is true.

He might as well be a priest. He's on, yeah, he's, you know, he's gone high and now he's coming back down. And you know, this, but me and this guy, we couldn't embarrass each other. And that is what makes a good drinking buddy to me. It's like, I had friends that I had a buddy, he would always give me one of these. Like if I were getting out of control, he'd go, hey, you know, you know. And my, but my other buddy was like,

amp it up, you know what I mean? He's like, we would get kicked out of a bar and laugh our way down to the next bar. It didn't, we didn't care. Yeah, it was a beautiful thing. And he also could fight. So it was really nice to have him on my team because you know I wasn't worried about hell raiser I'm like this I can say anything I want this guy's got me or at least he's gonna make the person think that he's got me right out and it was

beautiful I loved it talk about two dirtbags they did the right time end up beating up a guy really bad one time and then our friendship kind of ended because they got scared and kind of moved out of town. But this is not me. Alright, so now your dress is a demon character. I just want to give you a little backstory on this guy. So it's his car, but he let me drive. What kind of car? Like a Chevy Corsica Cavalier or something

like that. It's a two door it looked all right. He had a real raggedy car one time and it had a busted windshield and he got pulled over and the seatbelt law had just come into effect. And the cop comes up to this window my buddy was real cocky and he goes, that seatbelt huh? The cops like well yeah that and busted windshield and expired tag muffler hanging up you're dragging a deer man and he got his car got towed and he had to call down to the tow company and they go what kind of car is it he goes ah a

little piece of shit and so this was his next car and we get we get in the car and We're we're leaving and then we were pulling into this Neighborhood and there's a bunch of guys out out in the road I turned down this road the girls in the passenger seat. I'm in the driver. You're taking away back to your place back to my place right and And I'm so excited Sure, and and I'm driving and there's a bunch of guys in the road. And these guys are like waving to tell me to stop.

And I'm like, I don't know what they're up to, but I'm not stopping here. I don't know what this is all about. And it turns out I was going the wrong way down a one-way street. And I met a cop as I'm going down. Me and the cop went around each other on the one way. So I yelled to him, buddy, you're going the wrong way.

You fucking dumbass. I got out of town trimming the car, dude. Trying to kill me? I'm the prince of darkness. And I'm, yeah, I'm painted red. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Oh, that's right. You're dressed up like a demon.

So I pull over. I take the next turn. He's got a schoolgirl covered in red paint. It looks like she's been murdered probably. I turn to the right. I make the immediate turn to the right. And I go, let's get out. I turn the car off, take the keys out of the ignition.

My buddy in the back, he goes. Oh, he's in the car. Yeah, he's like, I'm staying. And he just laid down in the back. I got the keys. Me and the girl get get out we go walking back down the same street We just came down we walk for a little bit and then I go alright It's probably good now So we start walking back to the car and the cop is sitting right next to our car with his little car light

on the car and We just walk right by. Wow. And they never said anything to us. Nice. And yeah, she lived near there, so we went back to her house and it was the most exciting thing that had ever happened to her, I think.

Sure. And she rewarded me and it was the best. With some sweet lovin'. It was the best. Actually, we lovin'. It was the best. Actually we got her car and then my friend now doesn't have keys and he gets out of the car at some point and starts walking and now we can't find it. It ended up being a real we drive it. The cop didn't see him in the back seat? No. Not a good cop. No no. He just kind of drove by the devil. Didn't pull him over. Going the wrong way.

Didn't pull him over. Then loses him. Then sees the devil walking with a schoolgirl. Probably got spooked. It's the old key out of the ignition trick. It saved me two times in my life. And so we have to go find my friend. And he's on the interstate on ramp.

I'm driving. Walking? Walking. Where's he going? He's trying to merge. He's doing this. I'm coming in. What's he walking back to your place? I don't know. And then I see him so I make a U-turn but we're on a one way. So I make a U-turn into oncoming traffic. I pick him up and we drive and then we get into a fight in the car logically and then I drop him off and Then we go back to my house and it's like I had no regrets about the whole thing Wait, is the girl with you still she's still with we're in her car now

Okay So did you guys go inside hang out and then go back out and do this when in her house and got her car and then We went to my place. This is pre coitus as they would say oh, yeah, I mean it built up Honestly by the time because we had to go find my friend and by the time we got back to my house I really thought well She's probably over this by now, and I was really disappointed, but she wasn't did you wash all that shit off your face? I don't not right away I mean we had you know we got to it and then yeah

And then I did wash it actually I put some kind of lotion on my face before I put the paint on my face So it came off my face really good. That's pretty good my arms It didn't so I had to go to work the next day, and I had like really red red arms. I looked sick Down to four something there got sunburned If she craps soup is bad. But I mean, that's what my whole 20s was, was basically just one drunken a black out black out a lot.

And I would, you know, I go to happy hour. I go to brunch, drink mimosas. And then, you know, at noon switch to bourbon and, you know, I'd go throw up outside and come back. Yeah, I've and come back in. You were really getting after it. Now at this point, are you, you're making okay money, you know what I mean? You're hustling.

Are you doing alright? Yeah I mean I started. Are you saving or are you just drinking through this? Sounds like he's drinking through it. I'm saving a little bit but I am mainly drinking through it. You're drinking through it. I was like, that's a good time in your mid-20s. Yeah, it's like, you know, when you're living in Charleston, it's a tourist destination. It's a beautiful city. You go to these bars at happy hour, and the windows are up, and you feel the breeze from the sea coming in. You're eating the shrimp and oysters

and, you know, doing vodka shots. And you're like, this is the life. Yeah. Don't get better than that. Clean living. And then you get on your bike and wreck it. Or you drive out to Folly Beach. This is a thing about drinking and driving

that I think people miss. And I don't condone it, but this is what I'm saying. We gotta be honest, it sounds like you do. When you got a good- Take your keys out of the- You got a good buzz going on and you're driving and you're going across a marsh in the sun setting and you're smoking a cigarette You're like this is feet. You're listening to one of your favorite songs. You're like this feels good good song sit going

Yeah, you could do that without the booze Wow Now I do do that now, but man, what did you quit drinking? 2012 so at 29 made it your whole 20s. My whole 20s, I drank like that. Even starting comedy, we would go do comedy and then just get wasted after. That was starting comedy, we started in Philly. It was like, you're on stage for four minutes and you're drinking for five hours. That was comedy. It was like, it was just in the way of the drinking.

You'd have a couple beers, then go on stage and then start doing shots. Yeah and sadly, I mean so much of my life was an attempt to meet girls, right? So it's like comedy was now this thing where I'm like, oh if I can get up here and be funny, now I get- Something to talk about,, you were the guy

Yeah, and then you can have drinks and people buy you drinks. They go. Oh, that was really funny, man Let me buy you a drink when you quit. Did you quit on your own or did you I? Did quit on my own out. I had had a guy. I was gonna stop drinking. Yeah, damn I had a guy living in the same apartment complex as me now This guy was from Boston And he was an alcoholic and he I don't know This is what he said my wife has pointed out that because he said he was taking some time away from his family to You know get sober and and I was there by himself

Yes, but it's like my wife's like well don't move to a party city if you're like I need to get sober sure but this guy big Neil Young fan he had a he had a boat called crazy horse because he moved he moved to get away from his family so bro but he gets a boat but he's temporary I think I don't know either he bought it or he brought it okay But he had so you can't get sober on a boat if you ever write a boat you're drinking Called the crazy horse, but he pulls up to the apartment complex on the boat on the first night. No, no that would have been cool That's it. You know, he's drunk But he shows up I'm out on the porch. There's some girls that live in this

apartment. I'm hanging out with them. It's one of these apartments where the apartments, it's three-story. They're on either side and then there's kind of a breezeway in between. Gotcha. So we're out on the breezeway on the balcony of sorts. You're a big breezeway guy. Yeah and we're, yeah, because you really feel that ocean breeze through there. I'm out on a breezeway, I'm having a cig. And I'm listening to Neil Young, we're jamming cowgirl in the sand down by the river, and we're drinking. This guy shows up who has an alcohol problem and loves Neil Young, and there I am, and

I greet this guy. I'm like, come party with us, you know? And he does, and me and him end up partying a lot I don't remember why I brought him up, but oh he gave me after hanging out with me for a little while He gave me the big blue book the alcoholics anonymous book, okay He goes I think you might benefit from this buddy. I think you need Buddy, I think you need I make some copies of this he did need it. I'll tell you that

Anybody just walking up sees you see it in the breeze way smoking his sing listen to Neil Young goes my new best friend Guys guys got problems Yeah, he was 50. I was 20, but did he get his boat from Boston to Jarl? I have no idea. None of this is that though. We went out on the boat. I mean, this guy was great. You were on the crazy one? Yeah, he was in a band.

I mean, this guy... He was in a band down there? He was in a band, yeah. What? He's too established down there with a boat and a band. I mean, what the fuck? Yeah, I mean, he was great. He introduced me to Jarl.

Wait, you're already the comp troller of the city? What? Yeah, he came down ready to roll. You've been here two weeks to dry out? Well listen, I mean... There's a good chance this was all some type of delusion or something. There is a good chance. Cut to dusty stuck in the HVAC system.

There was a lot of fuzziness that went on. But I read the book. I did read the Alcoholics Anonymous book. And when I read it, I was like, oh, OK. I can see a lot of my stuff in there. I always felt like there was a lot. And I don't think of myself as an alcoholic. But I only.

Thanks. I mean, to each their own. But I'd go get those glasses checked. Go run them to the optometrist real quick. You and the crazy horse. I don't think I got it. Also that guy going, you might benefit from this. What the hell's he got it for? But I read it and I go, okay, there's definitely a lot of me in this book.

There's the binge drinking thing that I didn't think about, because for me, I didn't really feel like I had withdrawals, and I wasn't- You could control it and stuff. Yeah, but the moment I had a drink, then I was like, I'm down to do this until I throw up or pass out. Sure. I'm into this. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I would black out a lot, where you just hit a place where your body's still going. But now you're like no longer in control. Yeah, just having a couple is weird. Yeah, yeah. That's what I think people go, let's go for a couple beers. And I'm like, why? You know, take the weekend if you're having to crazy horse. Yeah, Neil Young's in town yeah, okay? And I love I love partying with this guy and you know I got he got he let me Open for his band one time. I talked to him into letting me open for his band and

Stand up stay cover banders doing original. He was doing originals where in Charleston in Charleston who the fuck was this guy? I don't know what was not from Boston and had a family. Well. He you know I don't know where he's right He did bring his family down eventually, but I think they separated again gotcha sure so okay But he didn't like the new stuff Yeah, he let me open for his band and and then this is dusty he parties He's gonna do a little time up top, but he wanted the breeze I remember his band and uh and anyway, he goes, since I got you this gig, he he goes I want you to do this thing for me I want you to go up and then go hey give it up for these guys they're really good huh and then go how about how about one more you know how about maybe we can get him

go on cool you know he goes get him to chant on so I his band he was going for his band yeah so he went and then I go I go that was really great huh and I didn't want to do it but I'm I was trying to get stage time. Of course. So I go on cool and nobody's nobody in the audience. Nobody wants an encore is joining in. But I turn around and I see my friend and he's headed back out. And then the guy over the PA goes, he goes, Yeah, that's not really how this works. He goes, we gotta break down everything, we gotta change it out. I go, okay.

So then I go, well, I'll just do my comedy then. So I start telling jokes and he goes, yeah, that's not really how this works either. We gotta- He's over the intercom? Yeah, he's like, we gotta shut down all these mics. And so my other friend had a, he goes, you know what? Once they get it all switched out, I'll just let you do,

you know, five or 10 minutes before me. So all of this, and then I bombed for five or 10 minutes. It's like a lot went into this for me to just bomb for that. But that was the point. I was told ago, you gotta bomb. You gotta learn how to handle it. So you need to get yourself in all situations. So it was good for me.

Yeah, of course. But, you know, in all situations. Good. So it was good for me. Yeah, of course. But, you know, what a mess. Sure. Well, I mean, in the saga of Dusty Slay, we've made it nine. We've made it 10 years. Yeah. Which is half of what we made in the first one. So we're, you know, unfortunately, we got to wrap it up.

But we've made it to 29. You're now sober and up. So next time you return, we'll start 30. Part three. Yeah, till now. Well, I appreciate 29. You're now sobering up. So next time you return we'll start 30 part three till now Well, I appreciate you guys are so funny This is just fun for me to do this because you guys make me laugh. Thank you the whole time. Thank you It's all I mean, you're one of my favorite guests. I can't believe you only made it nine years We made a jump from like 25 to 29 or well I was drinking we kind of breezed up all the stories become the same But I like the one about

the girl because You know I I the the ignition trick. I don't know if that's real I don't think you can I don't think you can't do it anymore because everything's pushed to start right behind the wheel That's it. But back in the day. Demon costume or not. I would sleep in my car sometimes when I would get too drunk and I'd go, I bet I shouldn't drive home now. I've done that.

And then you go, you get, but I, yeah, you just kick the seat back, sleep for a bit, wake up, drive home. Yeah. Yeah. Sober up. Well. Gang, the special, Wet wet heat out on Netflix right now One of our favorites one of my favorite one of the best dusty sleigh. Do you have anything coming up? You want the folks out there to know well? I just I'm just touring and so dusty sleigh commas my tour I got you know I got now. I got the wet heat on Netflix. I have working man, and I got an hour on YouTube I have a podcast. I do called the we're having a good time. Yes So yeah, that's it. I appreciate you guys. Okay, we love you

Keep your form and new a new hour. So if you watch wet heat and then come see me, it's all new jokes 65 minutes. Yeah. Yeah That could be 30 seconds of old material here and there. You might hear me say, thanks for coming out. How's everybody doing? But how else am I supposed to get into Joe? Give it up for the wait staff, huh? Guys, our tour is starting in September. Get those tickets. We're starting with the West Coast Run,

Pacific Northwest and the South and everywhere. Get your tickets. We love yous. We'll see you out there. Dusty, we love you. Yeah, man. Thank you. You guys are the best.

We love you. We'll see you next week. Peace.