Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Easter Burnies w/ Kippy& Foley

Episode Date: April 4, 2022

We got a HOT family ep with Kippy & Foley. Thanks for listening. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage https...://www.ButcherBox.com/AYG https://www.MVMT.com/Garbage https://www.BoxOfAwesome.com Promo Code: GARBAGE https://www.athleticgreens.com/GARBAGE Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans

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Starting point is 00:00:00 gang quick announcement on the middle-class famous tour we are going to be coming to a city near you for a live stand-up show and playing a yg with the audience we're going to be in san francisco california los angeles california la holla california and we'll also be in pittsburgh buffalo detroit denver phoenix salt lake city chicago then over there to roseman and that's just to me we're going to be adding some dates it's going to be a fantastic time grab the squad come out and see us get your tickets it's a good time welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now here are your hosts kevin ryan and h foley hey everybody out there and welcome back
Starting point is 00:00:53 to everybody's favorite new podcast this is our you garbage it's a little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that they grow to be classy yeah or if they're just a big old piece of trash i'm your host a trolley coming at you on a beautiful day down here aunt hoody's basement she's upstairs knocked out on the patio okay yeah when i find this son of a bitch i got a little payback someone went after someone someone snuck her she probably she probably has money on his street that dumb broad i don't know but as a vendetta we got it we got to fulfill yeah whose car are we taking it's like five brothers or what's it called four brothers they set her up they set hoodie up it's a great flick my co-host is coming at you from across the table he is the
Starting point is 00:01:35 ceo of are you garbage he's an international businessman do me a favor give it up for kevin what's up ryan everybody it is butt light jacket whoo this is vintage this is this is old school you look like you're triple parked outside just busted a case of corona looking for somebody to sign for this i finally get some cash starts dressing like a t-ball it's real dick vibes should have got a boy's head route dickhead i'm an amoroso man myself uh there's blood on the inside of this thing as we speak from its previous owners nice i'm big into vintage beer gear hold on i thought you were buying these new you're buying these are these are
Starting point is 00:02:20 used yeah man the the paps one was new this is this is like yellow like the tag a couple of softball games have been coached in that oh yeah a couple of real nail biters a couple of points been shaved too i think you stole that thing off the set of beaverly hills cop too jesus you stink i'm living my best life let me be that's all you have for us that's all i got i mean i'm going to take the beat and i'll just sit here and take it you know what i mean i dished them out myself you know i'd be i'd be uh i'll just go sit back and take it i'll you know do you i'll take it we love it guys as always please make sure you rate review subscribe that's what i was looking for i was about to pick it up for you oh no i thought i was about to hit him with it i to be honest i
Starting point is 00:03:07 thought there was going to be more no that's it light hearted we're having a nice time here with the friend of ours guys as you know please make sure you rate review subscribe on itunes full video available on youtube and as you know those numbers are true root who out at first uh uh and then uh you smell like pintar i got a nail file i'm shaving a ball he's got four more of these folks so sit back because they're going to keep coming four don't you i got about nine of these in the closet you wait till that michael opal gets broken out who are you pwe herman that thing is sweet dude trying to get a look this is my new personality
Starting point is 00:03:51 by the way um and then obviously i would be you're you're you're you're jamming up the plugs i apologize i'm trying to get to the moneymaker the thing that keeps you you fat in your apartment out there patreon.com slash r u garbage the greatest website of all time you can sign up be a bonus episodes a yg episodes of hard feelings yes by the way we dropped a couple about a week or two ago yikes they'd randled some cages everything's all right the boys are okay uh guys thanks for everything we love you love you both and have a quick shout out to our producer short and out of the magic man my best pal in the whole wide world and i love him to death give it up for mr toby mcmullin ladies and gentlemen what's up dudes t bow good to see you sir you too i don't
Starting point is 00:04:32 want to take up too much too much time kibby's got some kegs to deliver so we gotta get moving dude i'm double parked outside you look like you definitely wouldn't be checking ids when you dropped it off checking ids couple of house parties yeah never have you ever have a keg delivered no we would go get that we'd have you know uh an older uh that's real old school shit when they would deliver that was in the movies in the 70s yeah yeah never we never had that yeah leave it out front we would go pick up your cartoons inside we would go pick up for sure yeah yeah does anything move a keg better than a wood paneled station wagon it's pretty good we were we had my buddy his old suburban we called the dank tank and uh we would load him up in there
Starting point is 00:05:16 but we were a little pussy so it took like six of us to get it in the back because it was all jacked up it was only one kid that could ever tap it right too i was a pretty good tapper i stunk at i was all foam you had a hit quick baby i didn't get it i didn't get the science behind it i didn't get what the science guy i didn't get what the tap did or how it went in i always thought it was weird shit yeah taps were like a commodity at one point under got the keg i don't got a tap yeah anybody got tapped calling around yeah then yeah you're some dirt bags trunk of his mom's car something's fucked up and then you're calling like jimmy jimmy you got your tap what are you doing and like come on over you drink for give you a free cup that's how the beer stores would get you
Starting point is 00:05:56 hey you don't got a tap why don't you got a tap i don't know sir yeah because i'm 12 they were like 45 bucks or something if i remember which we didn't have back in the day i meant when i was a kid my parents my dad made it seem like the return fees on those kegs were eight million dollars the with with the urgency that he got the k i got the keg back yeah i got to get the keg back like what the fuck man yeah what was it a nickel back when i was banging they were 10 bucks a clip 10 bucks a clip and you would return it and we would you get the 10 bucks back and we would get a case of lion's head beer which was a local that's operating capital right yeah there you put that right back into the business i like that so if we had a party with like a couple of
Starting point is 00:06:39 them beer nuts if we had a party with like uh you know say saturday night we had three kegs or whatever three kegs yeah we would we would throw bangers down there on edgley street really bangers sometimes it got a little it was always any ladies yeah there was one there a real bruiser beat us an arm wrestling every time longest keg stand still record that's why you had the three kegs big lucy would take two just sitting in the corner with his drawl kevin get over here make out with me
Starting point is 00:07:19 um we would do in the basement of a row home in north philadelphia was the park i mean went to temple nothing good happens in the basement no no in a row home i mean sometimes fight fights would break out because like people would bring friends and friends of friends of friends from friends from home and college were always the word they didn't know the edict they never mixed they never friends from home from college always got too fucked up to the point where they become friends but they would be a feud first well yeah after years i fucking hated his dude when i first met him yeah oh man there's a lot of those there was people like we fistful that i don't know if he likes guys all right what's will he do in this weekend yeah every person
Starting point is 00:07:57 who's ever met me thinks my laugh is fake yeah well i've read the youtube comments one of my one of my one of my boys was like one of my best friends that was like i didn't speak to you for five months because you have the most annoying laugh on planet earth but a friend from a friend from home would get too fucked up like end up peeing in the sit like he didn't know the rule he just thought because they were typically like community college or like went straight to work the way i proceed so they didn't know protocol our friend they would they would just be like this is animal house and someone's like this is my bedroom here what are you doing fucking live here man our friends from high school were more degenerates than the friends from college oh what you know that
Starting point is 00:08:33 old standing rule college educated to a degree yeah yeah that's where that's where the problem would lie yeah i yeah i mean i'm gonna dump in somebody's dish wash yeah my friends would come rolling in with like a three-foot nitrous tank and a stun gun not a lie that was a party pussies better cancel class tomorrow because i'm staying for like three four days yeah i gotta get back to the fun you know now anybody looks at me sideways getting zipped did you have anybody did you have anybody that went to college but didn't go to college you haven't anybody i lived with yeah so that stayed there i so my first uh my first house the one i was talking about my one boy from high school went to like nine different universities oh yeah for like two years they always crap out and
Starting point is 00:09:14 then just live at one you do just live there yeah yeah so my boy that you met down in orlando yeah you were like that guy is fucking movie good looking oh man he was a looker he lived with we lived with him i grew up with him he lived we lived together in college me him and flip and another weirdo uh you know we needed one more guy to fill the bedroom and this guy who is a creep old dude hey the r.a sent me over yeah he had a real r.a vibe hey lenny put your shit over there yeah he was always like you want to go you're sleeping on the desk he would always like go want to go to my room to take shots we're like no way dude your room has a deadbolt on it dude not fucking go you got an outdoor door knob on that thing not going into your fucking room
Starting point is 00:09:57 you have bars on the windows on the inside no thanks so uh oh sorry whatever uh my friend he crapped out right he okay took a semester off after living there that's the kiss of death and he moved that's how to become a stripper right he moved his boy in who didn't even attempt to enroll in the university wait he took his room yeah he was don't worry about the room i got a guy i got a guy denny de Vito shows up his boy moved in and who and then this is how insane the world was we were living in flip and my friend who were living there shared a room together so then flip just had to share a room with this new guy like so like boot camp and then he moved his girl in and his girl she not moved around but she was just there a lot and she was nice we were
Starting point is 00:10:52 sleeping in the same room with flip yeah holy shit yeah a lot of squeaky squeaky going on there i think flip was fake sleeping a lot of times i heard that's how flip got involved with the movies he had night cam goggles a night vision on night vision in a gully suit in the corner um so yeah so that i mean that was like that year and then there was there was two guys or one guy that just recently had gotten out of prison they were hanging down there a lot i'm pretty sure they're not alive they were hanging down there they were showing us how to make prison food with ramen and making chi chi and so i'm like what am i i'm just gonna run to the calf dude yeah man i got fourth meal still if i make to the calf by 11 i i can make my own chicken farm i would take the chicken
Starting point is 00:11:40 fingers a little bit of the pasta sauce slice of american cheese and then with like three sodas of two Gatorades good night let's try love the cafeteria you know what i wanted to ask you speaking of food what's that um you meet you you briefly mentioned that uh around the around easter yeah all right i'm listening that you go down to the shore with the family yes but what was your because you were such a weird kid i'm a weird guy what was your east what was your easter basket situation was there an egg hunt egg what was the lineup um the lineup i would open my mom would middle my brother would close it out with a q and a what a strip show um uh it was pretty standard standard for sure because my brother and sister were normal i was the weird guy i could see you
Starting point is 00:12:25 being a real prick about your basket yeah i mean the peeps could kick rocks cough drops hard boiled eggs no way give me like the the rags chocolate kind of stuff you wouldn't jelly beans can kick rocks really at the bottom the grass is all in there no thanks you're not i don't like anything loose give me something a package i can open with an airtight seal and i can squeeze it to make sure the air doesn't sink in some scratchers yeah um then we did uh hold on you're not a hard boiled egg guy you would need a dyed egg no we used to make eggs we used to make eggs out with those i don't i don't think i'm a week later i've never had egg salad really never tuna salad chicken i don't like anything cold oh weird man what do you want from me um you should be wearing those
Starting point is 00:13:13 headphones all the time with that jacket on dude it does look like you're listening to the game right now whatever you do don't mention potatoes out to him or a freak to fuck out really taking it on the chin today boys um i uh this is so we did have a uh a hunt you know we would do like the plastic egg where you would put like the jelly bean a dollar a quarter or whatever sometimes this sometimes about a dub would be in there well this is one or two of them trashy we are i remember um my stepdad wrote a hundred dollar like you know dollar sign 100 on it and i owe you no but then super glued it shut and i couldn't i was like six i didn't even know what super glue was you know what i mean let alone that like he could be pulling the wool over my eyes
Starting point is 00:14:04 i'll just to fucking have him laugh and keep you busy for a couple of minutes dude i'm sitting there fucking i'm like it won't come off i'm fucking i'm like calling a lawyer do you hit it right behind a wasp nest it's on the roof uh yeah man i remember like i remember being so fucking pissed and he was and then there was nothing in there i got fucking stiffed on the hundo yeah real fucking i'll never forget that you know what the easter mbp is what that Reese's egg dude that was our cad berry eggs can kick rocks just because the commercials freaked me out with that goddamn bunny i love them and that was one of my they're one of my favorite you got a fresh one of those fresh like what recently recently made they're fantastic there's a lot of candy like that that's
Starting point is 00:14:50 a lot it's a lot of candy the situation is one wasn't made some of that shit could be could be a year or two old that's why you do get the holiday stuff because it's usually fresher okay i mean it's how fresh you don't know you're assuming you can taste the difference what if i told you it was made eight months before because i used to work at a chocolate factory yeah and that to lead yeah that lead you had two phones looking at me somebody goes how many jobs is kippy it's a lot of the guy in quantum leap i've never seen it no i work i spent a lot of time in the chocolate factory so what's this have to do with my listen it doesn't come right it doesn't fucking come off the line into a truck to the cvs for you to eat i'm aware of the line straight into police fat yeah i'm you're
Starting point is 00:15:35 sitting there like that little swedish boy from willy wonka i'm squeezing them like bread dude they sit in boxes and warehouses for like two years i know so i'm saying the ones so you're telling me you can tell the difference between a cadbury egg that was made two years ago and eight years ago 100 how about two years and three years well you said it's not fresher anything that's two years old isn't fresh well i mean you made it seem like you were waiting at the kitchen door like you know they were coming out with them comparatively speaking i would say you you can taste that difference okay and they're usually the ones that are the holiday ones they think they make figure they make those less you work for bud light you tell me you know yeah you should sit
Starting point is 00:16:17 shit sits on his shelf for a long time i can't believe that that's used i'm stunned that you're wearing a jacket that has somebody else's blood on it yeah you know i'm trying to make uh i think it was a crime there's a bullet hole in the back a couple of stab wounds i gotta get patched up a little road rage incident he won't be needing this or he's going it was a bad call what do you want yeah i got a handful of really old like proper vintage ones some of them didn't hold up i gotta return them or sell them or give them to a listener if you would like i got a couple hit me up some are just too small or too big you know the sizes back in the 70s were all fucking all over the place holla at your boy dude i'll rock one oh no no no i like that idea yeah you gotta give one to toby
Starting point is 00:17:06 then when we get in fights with each other we can kick dirt on each other yeah yeah are you fucking blind t bone you call that a clip you call that a clip can we get thrown out of the studio get out hit the showers t bone you're off your meds just sitting there doing the show a big thing a gatorade comes flying at me a bunch of sunflower seeds are kicked everywhere and what would what would the meal be on Easter again um as we got older we've touched on this briefly yeah so we go so now we go down the shore uh we go to wildwood uh and then saturday we go to my aunt's and sea isle which you've been to yes i have uh shout out ampati shout out ampati lovely home uh we'll do ham we'll do meat but like we'll do the crock pot with like meatballs sausage
Starting point is 00:18:00 kubasa okay okay i'm listening typically you know uh kubasa is done on the grill in wildwood the day of and then brought over yeah i mean it's the 15 minutes or whatever love it um serve it cold the kubasa yeah uh i don't know i can't recall i say around the the the sausage and meatballs that's where i lie and you got like the rolls the pre-sliced rolls sitting there i know a plate of fucking provolone and american cheese a little parm it starts sweating after a couple of hours yeah do that up the ham's definitely floating around then you got the fucking dips you got the you know the whole nine we did ham scallop booze too we use it as a boozing it's a boozing holiday of course we're having a cocktail it's a lords day a couple bloody bloody marys what's going on say that three
Starting point is 00:18:50 times in front of the mirror when you're all fucked up scallop potatoes turn into the easter bunny scallop potatoes was big and we would do a pineapple upside down is this a dinner this this is this is a formal dinner coleslaw we don't do a sit down ours is more of a stand there's so much there's just too many people it's like a buffet there's like so many lawn chairs you know what i mean i know yeah oh so many those brown metal folding chairs those get broken out our family's just too big every event is minimum 30 adults and at this point 30 kids so it's like chaos the guys are on the back deck hanging out there's typically some golf going on downstairs in the tv room not the masters always on easter we're a big golf family so they're kind of coming up tigers here they
Starting point is 00:19:37 michelson's here a lot of new short sleeve button downs getting broken out yeah a lot of plaid it's a lot of spring yeah yeah yeah for sure i like that uh-huh pretty classy pretty good pretty all right good shit always dipping away for a couple of heaters with the with the boys sneaking out coming back because now all the sauvignon blanc all that all the all the cousins like the cousins of of my age to all crank heater who crank burnies they all have like seven eight year old kids running around so they got to duck around we got to go around the corner or duck behind a car because they don't want their kids knowing they're they're fucking dabble in the let me ask you this do you have any do you have anybody in the generation below you that has aged
Starting point is 00:20:18 into heaters have you witnessed that last time you saw him he was 16 now he's 20 you're smoking no i think the oldest one of the generation below me is probably 90 i mean they're definitely boozy just dipping just dipping on the weekend he's a weekend warrior i'm sure they do a little lip right i mean i know some of the teenagers are definitely boozing it's kind of like that yeah because they disappear like we used to oh we're gonna run back over to the house we forgot the whatever a lot of errands yeah a lot of errands and there's only six white claws missing i don't know what's happening nine kids going to get a bag of ice come on we know save a toke for uncle hank can't let's talk about movement movement talk about movement
Starting point is 00:21:04 talk about two young college dropouts trying to turn the watch game upside down and that's exactly what they did with movement i'm a big watch guy i know that movement makes nice pieces at a fraction of the cost fair prices fair prices unexpected colors unexpected colors now they're in the sunglasses you go over their website they got everything you need top quality looking stuff at a good rate yes movement watches uh have the looking quality of a 400 to 500 dollar watch your pain watch you your pain for at an apartment store but a fraction of the cost of the price because they were they were built online and use their own process from start to finish no middle man going right that is always uh they also have the blue light glasses they were nice enough to
Starting point is 00:21:50 send us watches and glasses yep my lady loves loves the blue light she's at the computer all day working yep uh the ever scroll blue light filtering glasses are a game changer really helps with eye strain and poor sleeping patterns uh in a modern style frame if you want to elevate your look with that style that doesn't break the bank then join movement and get 15 off today with free shipping and free returns by going to mvmt.com slash garbage again that's mvmt.com slash garbage do it yeah gang let's talk about butcher box butcher box let's talk about butcher box let's talk about a meat or a freezer full of meat salmon wild caught got organic turkey chicken ground beef yeah ground beef coming at speed bumps pick it up ground beef coming out of your ears i know just
Starting point is 00:22:37 made a nice rigatoni with some quinoa pasta the other night delicious love butcher box they're fantastic uh like you said they were nice enough they sent us a freezer full of stuff whatever from a to z uh it's uh high quality meat better taste more ethical more sustainable the whole nine yards no any b no antibiotics nope no hormones nope each box contains eight to 14 pounds of meat depending on the box you choose that's enough for 24 individual meals packed fresh ship frozen for convenience so you can save time uh and energy on your next grocery store trip customize your own box or go with the ones they got already either way you're getting exactly what you want yeah this this is this is boncos this is not this is great this is your chance to never have to
Starting point is 00:23:20 shop for ground beef again this is how are they staying in business that's right folks butcher box is giving new members free ground beef for life and it's the good stuff it's the good meat it comes the little square deep red color uh-huh good fat marbleization throughout the ground beef i'm telling you it's awesome plus you get a ten dollar off coupon sign up at butcher box dot com slash a yg and get uh two pounds of ground beef free in every order for the life of your membership plus a ten dollar off coupon log on to butcher box dot com slash a yg to claim this deal do it that was always that was always like the bitch work i have a party in down the shore because c i'll but we used it as our advantage to catch heaters because parking spots are big down there
Starting point is 00:24:00 too so you got to take the bike everywhere but you don't mind because it adds to the trip more heaters plus you got the kids you got the gang with you you got the squad everybody rolls out a couple of burnies good stuff good time we had this one cookie that was big it was it was like every family got one sounds like a hell of a dinner it was like a big shortbread cookie with a hard boiled egg in the center what it was some kind of Italian thing they're pretty good though i don't know t-bone you looking that up we don't really mess with Italian Easter cookie with egg in the middle Sicilian Cuddera Italian Easter cookie there you go this is the worst thing it's ever been made i'm telling you they're fucking delicious it's like an awesome shortbread cookie with an egg in it
Starting point is 00:24:43 yeah the heart's egg i don't know if you're supposed to i did that wasn't even cooked Henry i mean they they really hit gold with pasta but they fucking missed on this one i'm telling you man it's good i know Puerto Rico they give the kids a little chicks little baby chickens we did that no you didn't yeah oh that's right you told me that we did that with chicks and ducks somebody would go down there and get one um yeah my go to like a poultry place at north philly wouldn't you no we would save them from the slaughter no it was like davis feed meal or something out and like the so we live in the burbs but like right about like it's like all suburban but right above us is like kind of country they're not country but like more farm more rural now was back when we were kids now
Starting point is 00:25:27 it's all developed but there was like a feed meal i should get a baby duck that'd be awesome what would you do with it would they grow up would you give him away the chick died the first night he tried getting out and broke his neck wait hell of an omelette though that sounds like epstein that's weird all the cameras bro yeah two guys just had a big lunch at the same time yeah weird i'd never had a pet that broke its neck well it was Jesus christ Kevin we didn't know yeah i don't know it died it was too probably too young for us to have you broke its neck psycho no i didn't relax we didn't know what we were doing with it i mean we put it in like a we put it in a fish tank we didn't know what the fuck we were doing with it i think you know put it a cool thing
Starting point is 00:26:11 yeah call it a day i and then the ducks we kept for a while then they got too big where did they what we put them in a pond where did you where did you get chicken we had a chicken wire in the backyard it's just in the spring i guess that's crazy you had ducks yeah who what would you feed them i don't know spaghetti a couple of mic and i don't ducks need water like don't they have to live in did you have like a baby pool or something out there don't act like this isn't i'm trying i'm being insane with this line of question i'm trying to remember i know you're 12 years i don't even you kept ducks trying to remember sitting with l l bean over here i didn't know that Ralph lorenz yeah like a j peterman yeah we had duck i think i told you and then we at some
Starting point is 00:26:57 point they got too big and a little violent if you ask me for my taste uh heard loud music coming from the backyard out there smoking and drinking all people stop people stopping by all there's a couple of carjackets we couldn't pin it on them but um my radio was missing uh no we yeah at some point they were in a pen in the backyard i'm assuming there was some sort of water source for them yeah for sure but then i think my mom i don't know why she was like this is nuts yeah that's not well so my sister it's crazy to have a duck let alone multiple ducks yeah that's that's what's throwing me off yeah and the chicken mysteriously dies the first night no the ducks died huh uh no but then we took him to a pond with so my sister and all her friends got i think we mentioned this my sister
Starting point is 00:27:48 and all her friends got them this for Easter that was like what they were doing i don't find they were like a nickel so they all got them thinking it'd be cute and then sister in law my sister okay and at some point they all got too big and everybody all the parents are like this is you have fucking wild birds at the house this is crazy but that's nuts so we all put them in somebody had a pond in their like their backyard like a forest okay and they were like oh just put them in here when we did that then we went and visit them and i got attacked by one of bit me in the back of the leg i ran do you ever see those videos with the bird chasing the kid that happened to me this fucking this thing came beeline he could smell the fear or the pee in my face he was holding a two
Starting point is 00:28:24 foot hoagie at the time though oh no way to drop the hoagie in my in my head he had an apron covered in chocolate from the battery could be you have real food taken by animals vibes as a kid you really do man he's you want to pretend that if you dropping your shit and running like a bitch oh i've run i still run from birds i'll hit the deck i don't fuck with them man i really don't throw your funnel cake and beat it it's never what they want though seagull with a mouth full of cheese fries is a little fat angry gibby screaming on the boardwalk ah that's good stuff yeah what do you want from me all right nothing all right let's give us some cues oh shit you're right do a couple of cues these here as you know when you sign up
Starting point is 00:29:14 for the old patreon you get your question right on the air on the air um all right this is uh this is from mike uh have you ever patted and pet your dashboard like a dog and said it's okay girl you got this talking like talking to my car all the time yeah as far as i'm concerned my car is alive especially this one i have a very very strong connection with it yeah also crazy i think he's more respond more referring to a car that's in bad shape oh where you're like you gotta coax it into because my Chevy lumen a 96 Chevy lumen oh yeah you gotta be a when you're gonna finesse the second i think the second gear was a little wonky so you had to blast through it right to third no reverse um growing up there was this kid that didn't have reverse and as he drew a conversion
Starting point is 00:30:03 van to school like it's what he drove and he just had to there was no i swear to god there was no reverse in it so he just kind of had to constantly loop around and look for parking spots that he could pull out of what if somebody pulls it ahead of you you're screaming like no he would pull front into a spot that he could then like pull out of or he would he'd have to park it on the street he could have parked it in the driveway because he couldn't get out that kid definitely worked on the weekends did i i think a weekday i think he was working before school too he was he was going in and opening up the shop like a larry bird up there yeah that's awesome yeah it was bad uh also don't think he's alive i could be wrong though um man the kids i grew up with
Starting point is 00:30:48 drop like flies there was a most of them made it through high school but then once we got into our 20s things got real fucking hairy kind of it's the jacket but you're a real ray of sunshine today you mentioned the eo deed i didn't say i said he's no longer with us yeah it was a blood yeah come on read between the line it wasn't septus i could tell you that uh there's a parachuting he wasn't on his speed boat okay speed ball maybe exact couple of high balls hot shots the autopsy was waved uh i used to have to deal with my Chevy Lumina up hills because i think it was from second to third second was shot so you kind of really had and if you came off the gas before you got to third gear it like it would just the engine would
Starting point is 00:31:45 rev and you wouldn't really accelerate so going up hills i really had to be like two or three steps ahead to be like all right baby we got a fucking blasting it up yeah we got a we got a fucking start getting some momentum here daddy oh let's get up to top of this hill everyone's like what the fucking you doing like nah trust me this is well everybody yeah everybody knew at that point it was a car nobody could drive because she had certain you know you had to know her i've never started a car confidently i don't think i'm always expecting it to not start yeah well now this is the first car the key is the first new car i have so i have no fucking turn it and burn it no sweat on that but the Montego that thing that was a roll of the dice at all times glad he had a little
Starting point is 00:32:28 thing the other day she's been were you with me at one point in that yeah you're a starter or something's going on yeah you're with me that's just she didn't start panic yeah like this happened sometimes it's been happening it's turning volume i'll tell you why what i'm all for the the green energy and moving forward it's that goddamn fucking button that you that it's it's the that it kills everything when you're in a stop sign yeah you hate that i fucking hate that where they when you're idling it shuts down shuts down and then you said that's gotta do something bad to the car don't why would the car manufacturer i'm not saying you're wrong but like i turn it off okay that's just a button to turn it off but i think that's what it is it's what it feels like
Starting point is 00:33:07 and this is from your professional opinion yes okay just checking from my many years yeah being a fat piece of shit uh okay well which i am i didn't say that and i i don't think i've made one fat joke thus far pretty good i think i did call you fat in the intro but i was taking a lot of you got car blush buddy fire away i'm still i'm still taking off my t-bone guilt um all right this one's from jimmy dean ever own a product advertised by billy maize oh we got flex seal right now that wasn't billy maize sure it was flex seal was billy maize i thought it was that old other guy i think they did the boat no that's billy that was billy one of bill billy maize cornerstones i thought he made his bones with oxy clean ah which i used this morning to clean my nikes real yeah that my
Starting point is 00:33:55 wife ruined billy maize did not do i don't see flex seal by you seal game flex tape oh the flex tape he did flex tape was flex tape first maybe maybe also did mighty putty it's got his fingers in a lot of pies that billy maize yeah yeah guy could move some fucking units his fingers in a bag of yak yak through apparently no no wasn't it something he got hit in the head with he like his head on a luggage thing or like luggage fell and hit his head or something really i think on a plane at landing i could be making all of this out i thought he was knee deep in an eight ball no i might have to cut that that beard too man that beard was solid that dude he like that was just for men he had it that whatever it was whatever those guys need that guy fucking had it well
Starting point is 00:34:34 you know what they do they make their bones in the fucking you talked about at the trade shows step right up step which i've also done step right up step right in back when i was running train shows out of the valley forge convention i was a valley forge i was an ac is in delaware i was in i was in jersey at a they turned a hockey rink into one i would like you to write down all your jobs for okay okay write down everything that you've ever done we'll do it we'll do it the next bonus so we can have a master list okay in case you start getting lippy what you're sending back to santo palato talking about the time you were a fishing boat captain i never said i was first mate uh billy maize did not die in a cartoonish plane incident he did however pass away from a
Starting point is 00:35:21 heart attack in his sleep going to bed is tampa condo look up what happened to him the day before okay there was something with an airplane and luggage fell on his head i don't know if they ever connected those two if there was foul play the same guy did his did your little chickling uh nothing on it oh he was coked up was he thank you wow i don't mean to discredit the dirt to kill of the man yeah but to be fair if you die in a tampa condo at 50 and drugs aren't involved that's a bad luck that's a new story yeah local guy passes away no shit what biker gang got him not just hold age grip up really cocaine was evolved and they found in the autopsy yeah oh damn well you win some you lose some those autopsies don't keep their mouth shut today
Starting point is 00:36:19 should it use some of that flex buddy right yeah oh yeah there's no lying to him yeah you got around to spin it afterwards oh yeah no you got to take whatever narrative is thrown at you yeah you and your estate i'm gonna do several pre-taped spin zones of how i might possibly die so i can i can play when i'm dead put like popping in the vcr it was my friends yeah i was holding it in my nose for a friend that would be what you leave me in your will what clips to subtitle yes hey can you subtitle this for me debone would you want to be the guy that got that for anybody what like like if i went if you had to go sit with the the estate guy and there was some nefarious things here's a tape that you have to to burn or here's here's here's what he wants you to like an envelope
Starting point is 00:37:15 or something of your dying last wish yeah uh no but it would for sure be me it would be left to me to still clean up your mess after you're fucking dead and gone i gotta fix your mistake i also got laundry it's a laundry match yeah you're somehow somehow giving me attitude in a letter hey what's up boldly probably one of those dumb jackets hey dick yeah i got two amazon packages coming later tonight don't open them let's leave them at the grave site bring them upstairs because my neighbor's a little antsy oh man when you go i'm gonna have to deal with so much shit you don't know that for sure the longer you get out of me i think the better it's gonna be buddy it's not if it happens in the next six months yeah you're gonna have a lot of a lot of cleanup a lot of cleanup our social
Starting point is 00:38:06 security numbers are tied together in this goddamn business um fuck take that dna video in Jurassic Park hey Kevin oh man dude also if you go the fucking foley's are gonna be coming out of the woodwork to wet their feet not to mention the tell all book it's already written trash in the shit out of you your kippy doesn't even drink he just wears those jackets oh yeah you probably you're probably gonna have all print out of our text and shit me fucking voice recordings of me screaming at you do you have a will also this just in we set the date on the patreon we're gonna have a financial advisor come sit down with us and go over our finances and get us on track on track to a road to you know sound financial planning
Starting point is 00:38:58 yes planning for retirement yes investments 100 full mark investments uh yeah like what you should like vending machines the laundromats you sat down on top like we can open up a laundromat and someone's like his thought that's good business of success it's opening it's i knew a couple guys that don't launch you back to my hometown they did pretty guy on my block right growing up make your own hours we had uh retails tough retails tough though you can't trust everybody gotta be there you can't trust anyone okay everybody steals from me in retail especially cash business like a laundromat yeah hey how many you know how many fucking just listen to their pockets on the way out hey barry can i talk to you for a minute bespoke post bespoke post box of awesome ladies and gentlemen
Starting point is 00:39:45 bespoke post box of awesome will make you 10 degrees cooler easy easy spring time what do you think's coming in it around spring time cool spring stuff yeah pocket nice outdoor stuff stuff for the bar it's going to be part of the barbecue with grooming materials yeah smelling fresh looking fresh feeling fresh box are awesome from our good friends at bespoke post you got to get on yeah to get started just take the bot just take the quiz at boxofawesome.com your answers will help them pick the right box of awesome for you they release new boxes every month across a ton of different categories each box is valued at around 70 box but it doesn't cost that does it fraction of the price you get it for good good guys over and gals over there love a fraction of
Starting point is 00:40:28 the price uh plus with box of awesome you're supporting small business 90 of everything that comes from box of awesome is from a small up and coming brand it's free to sign up skip a month at any time or cancel whatever you want to do get 20 off your first monthly box when you sign up at boxofawesome.com another code garbage a check out that's boxofawesome.com code garbage for 20% off your first box one more time write it down boxofawesome.com code garbage do it athletic greens AG1 let me tell you why I started taking athletic greens why is that one as you know I'm a portly gentleman sure it was time to get my health in check I started working out yeah I noticed when I was going to the gym and working out I was still feeling a little bit tired even when I just drank
Starting point is 00:41:04 water or whatever I tried to stay hydrated switched over to athletic greens they sent us they sent us a bunch you're like Popeye I used it for a month throw it in there real easy shake it up taste great one stop shop vitamins endurance immunity gut health the whole nine yards I noticed a specific difference when I drink athletic greens throughout my workout that I feel better and I last longer yes 75 high quality vitamins minerals whole foods sourced superfoods probiotics and adaptogens not in the bedroom take that to the bank yeah it's lifestyle friendly whether you eat keto paleo vegan dairy for your gluten free contains less than one gram of sugars yep no nasty chemicals no artificial flavor why still tasting good if the big man likes it I like it you
Starting point is 00:41:45 know it tastes good what are we doing let's go right now it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient daily nutrition swimsuit season's coming just one scoop and a cup of water every day that's it no need for a million different pills hey did I take this I take that AG1's got you covered just one stop shop to make it easy athletic greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune boost no a moon immune boosting vitamin D and five free travel packs for your first purchase all you have to do is visit athletic greens.com slash garbage again that's athletic greens.com slash garbage to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance back to the show back to the show
Starting point is 00:42:21 but he I was I remember they had like a really nice house we had our house was nice but like very basic you bit it's just like you know they had like the land your house is like a doll's house yeah it's pretty if you hadn't played with your dolls in like five years yeah um there is they had like the landscape they had like the street lamp like out front you know what I mean like at the beginning of their driveway they had like a big brick the little touches everything done real well and I remember going to ask my dad I go what the I was like eight I'm like what the fuck does this guy do you know what I mean because we were real big about figuring out money and what's that guy do what's this guy do I go what's a bunch of little dirt balls in the back of the car
Starting point is 00:43:00 and he's like well when you grow up like my dad owned a business so when like that was his life 24 seven so it's like everything revolves around that business that business is your life you know of course so it's like you're in the car taking call like you know we were going to job sites and drive around look at commercial property think if you want to buy it or not yeah we were never that far ahead um but we were more looking at fucking vending machines and shit but I was like what's he doing because oh he's a couple of laundromats I was like there you go had a good looking lady with him there you go yeah I was like this guy's fucking doing it there you go it was one of those Italian dudes were like jean shorts out like dress nice probably a second marriage
Starting point is 00:43:42 for sure no no no dress nice do yard work you know what I mean like hair was done like nice I'm like this guy's those guys that do their yard work that's a different breed they keep it looking real tight yeah they do it all themselves we do ours but it looks like shit it was my job and I didn't care you know many times I cut just the front yard to get my mom off my back so our neighbors she goes we look like fucking bums what are you doing so I would just cut the front yard and go back to whatever party I was at be cutting the grass at night is a tough look oh didn't even have to put your sandwich in the fridge just left it right there on the plate be back in 20 we had the oldest john deere tractor dude this thing was fucking from
Starting point is 00:44:23 90 it's he had a tractor dick I know I know I know but john deere too those we had to jump it every time to start it huh we had to literally jump the tractor with one of the parked cars and if if everybody was gone I don't know you could do that if everybody was gone yeah I was seven jumping a fucking 1972 fucking john deere tractor the seat was all rattler out there oh dude the seat was all fucking chipped away and shit just metal yeah it was bad that uh but let me sting in the summer of those jumper battery packs that just had like the two that's pretty classy but this is my life goes hit in the 90s hard yes this is this describes my classy verse trashy life in my head I'm like oh we have we have this cool new piece of technology they can jump a car without another car but we're
Starting point is 00:45:12 using it to jump the old tractor every week yeah usually the guys that had those never used them they were just in the back of their outies or something oh we use it all the time I mean I used it weekly and then you'd have to charge that thing and if that thing wasn't charged it was a fucking yeah it was a lot felt like I was managing a fucking the mechanic shop watching tv of one of those things all right this one is from Casey uh do you or anyone you know live by a code of honor is there anything I have I do have buddies like that where it's like you don't fucking say this about my fam or like very weird guidelines where they they try to live by they think it's like you know they're you know I think they're like taking over the west it's not yellow
Starting point is 00:46:03 stone you know what I mean it's like buddy relax code of honor we're plowing the stars or something no no yeah don't know anybody unless I don't know I don't know if I don't know guys guys that live by that tend to tell you like you won't disrespect my name you know maybe ever I don't know if I have any samurais in the family uh no I don't think any of us would subscribe to that but you can call you can say anything about any one of my like I I'm so like but we do we do all abide by like the certain unwritten rules of comedy yeah yeah it's true you have those like no kids either what like hurting kids or making fun of kids or anything like that or I'll make fun of a kid treating kids like adults ever what I might be my one thing treating kids like adults yeah I don't
Starting point is 00:47:03 know what that means like talking to one of like like not yelling at a kid but like they're always considered kids and you know they're always taken with a grain of salt not a grain of salt um handle with kick loves yes you're always nice to them like you know you would never like you know like reprimand somebody else's kid or anything like that does that make sense I'm not articulating it well no I catch a kid slipping around me I'm letting the little fucker know what time it is like hey man don't do that no I'm gonna punch him right the fucking leg drop this pussy yeah we have a very open parenting part like I said my family's so big that all the kids anybody can get any adult no your family's different I meant like strange like different
Starting point is 00:47:50 stranger kids stranger strange kids don't even exist in my eyes yeah no I don't yeah outside kids I don't you know I don't fuck I don't pay attention to anybody that's my thing I've just seen adults talk to kids that they didn't know as if they were adults can you give me an example I'm trying hey do you have own bitcoin or like they're like I don't understand what you mean or like yelling at them like yeah yelling at them as if don't put your feet on the door I don't know not even shit like that just like you know like hey man I was there like you know if the kid like staggered and like a grocery store line or something like that you know what I mean I guess man I'm not explaining it right yeah but just be we've given you three minutes doing you can't get there I don't
Starting point is 00:48:32 think it's happening big guy that's my only code I'm nice to kids that's my code okay there you go that's not a code that in the acusa I look over you're in a black top your black suit two oozies on the table this one's just funny this is the acusa that's what I think that's the one I'd want to be in if you had your choice they're gentlemen real quiet like they don't they're not all they're not all up in your face real just around you and you're jammed up with that be what what what organized crime organization would you want to be in Italian mob there's so much romance behind the Italian mob with all the movies and you know the 70s and 80s and stuff like that um yeah that would be fun I guess but what is it you got the Italian mob you got the yakuza
Starting point is 00:49:24 I think I would definitely go yakuza get to live in Japan I don't know dinner real late one of the cartels might be pretty fun too but you really gotta throw everything to the wind at the cart I don't have the heart for that yeah no shit I feel like the cartels I would be like a second yeah that's kind of you know she had a bathroom with a chainsaw like fellas it's moving a little fast yeah well give him a noogie or something give him a wedgie I would join those crooks down in Washington DC the biggest center to McMullen hey y'all doing that you just bought 35 shares of an oil field in you know Afghanistan oh wouldn't it suck if that was how we were wow
Starting point is 00:50:07 yeah that's a that's a there's no fun in that those guys are bozos yeah yakuza gets nice tables at restaurants I would join uh I don't know man like I said I've been watching Yellowstone that seems like a pretty fun life battle wrestler being a ranch hand who dab like the code is the ranch is above everything uh-huh right people trying to steal the land people trying to steal their cattle this whole thing and it's like they're gonna get this show doesn't it take place now who's muslin out of his land big business can you just sue them what's with all the gunfights this is the wild west things are different now I thought they were in Ohio you look over I'm on a horse get this guy get a cease and desist order we need to couple of them are filed we don't we don't
Starting point is 00:50:53 need to be torturing each other's barns anymore uh you would think that yeah well you need to you gotta send a message somehow lawyers take a long time you know it doesn't mile tough cocktail I mean if you're plugging up somebody streamed if I can dry them out that's pretty medieval that's chess all right hey they didn't build the casino there did they how you gonna run a casino with no with no water who the hell wants to go to that resort couple sticks of dynamite make that make that creek making a left you know what I mean did they do that on there they did something with dynamite when they blew something up yeah they read just they reworked a creek and they couldn't build the resort there because who the hell wants to say to dry resort need a babble in brook
Starting point is 00:51:40 you know what I mean these yuppies coming in from LA I'm telling you it's a good show check it out that Kevin Costner fucking that guy that guy's got some jobs oh yay he does he's got all kippy fired up he had me cut the power Tuesdays with stories yeah we start I start I start going yellow stone on other podcasts I brand T bone he's mine always wear the AYG mark just a trash can a good time we're having a good time I'm having a good time all right this has been a wacky one this one I'll divert to you this is from Joseph uh is it garbage to combine fast food with homemade food for dinner yeah that's bad right I can't do that I guess what would you do if you had like a Big Mac and like a side of I don't know mashed potatoes or something the only I assume that would
Starting point is 00:52:40 the I assume the entree the the main dish the protein would be from the would be from the fast food right I don't know you have I I've known people that like would make like a hamburger at home but have fries left over from McDonald's and throw them in the oven and shit like that the fuck has fries left over from McDonald's I don't this just goes back to the I eat it all or I eat till I can't eat anymore I eat it all unless I don't like it I waited tables what the fuck would take home a half a thing of fries I waited tables with with with a girl that used to mix and match different leftovers in a pan and do them up the only guy my wife does that the only guy can do that with his Chinese food I could take the
Starting point is 00:53:22 if I have like fried rice left over maybe some dumplings or something like that I can throw it all the same country or throw all the fried rice in the pan and throw the dumplings in there let them heat up and then a little hot sauce or an old thing make like a little bowl out of it my wife will do that's it my wife will do if we have like fucking but there's a half of a cold McDonald's hamburger in the refrigerator I'm just going to house that yeah I would argue will you live in a world where there's not going to be a half of a fucking McDonald's hamburger in the fridge the orders were getting pretty big towards the end there so you'd be mistaken on that okay senator okay my apologies sorry moving on um sorry I'm a little nervous first
Starting point is 00:54:00 time I sat there with Tony LaRusso what come on no idea who that is yeah should have said Tony Hawk or something maybe would have got it hippie all right big man's back speaking of fully dating himself in the car he admitted to me that he's never seen the mighty ducks everyone bully him online whoa I'm gonna check it out though I'm gonna check it out maybe tonight I think it's playing down at the paragraph a cherry popping some switzers please uh yeah it's a great film I mean also it's one of those things where like I was at the age like I was at the age of the god of the kids in the movie playing hockey like it was like the most fucking which is what I was trying to explain to him in the car uh was that I was 10 years older than that so I looked at that stuff
Starting point is 00:54:51 like stupid kitty shit yeah you know what I mean it'd be weird red dawn was my mighty ducks yeah soviet invasion continent of the United States and a crack commando insurgent force seems like a lot of family fun led by matt dillon and c tom is how I watch you pull a stormtrooper action figure out of your pocket to go through security at the airport and you're talking to me about little kids well the good guns on them what do you want me to do you gotta check them can't bring a phaser blaster on a commercial flight what are you nuts relax my lightsaber is off yeah I don't want anybody to get you're like the comic book guy from the simpsons going through fucking security I would eat 12 more sheets please don't touch my
Starting point is 00:55:48 super belt it's deactivated at the moment that's funny I just watched that episode the other day where he returns the ultimate belt and we were talking about in the car he goes into the story he's like I like to return this quote unquote ultimate belt and the guy goes do you ever receipt quote unquote sir is that the one where bart has it right does bart have one takes it to school and he takes it to school in the bull and the bullies are chasing them and he's like how to lose them and puts the left turn signal on but turned right I'll never forget that he's going left they catch them though yeah they get them yeah they always get them and then Homer gets beat up by their dads who look just like them
Starting point is 00:56:35 all right this one's just funny this is for McLovin uh is it garb just start smoking after buying a burny switcher yeah I don't want to encourage Jesus Christ I don't want to encourage anybody to start smoking as I'm trying to never smoke who starts smoking and they're when they're an adult that's great pretty cool dudes I guess I don't know I wouldn't suggest that to anybody of course not don't do that let's fill it Morris gets on board then I'll push anything money that's my bro lights and ag1 ladies and gentlemen money talks baby get me down in front of congress um all right let's see here this is good this is from Brendan hey fellas just join the patreon no question just this the sound of a lighter tumbling in the dryer
Starting point is 00:57:29 dude that's how you find them that's oh man you could I've been busted for that three blocks away that's got me busted that's how you get knocked yeah think think think what is that oh shit yeah I swear I was just starting fires I was just burning down the old mill yeah that's what gets you knocked yeah um this is all right let's do one or two more then we got a skitties um this is from Lando haven't had one read yet have you ever gotten out of your car to move a construction slash road close sign so you can drive through a buddy of mine did this and drove his car into wet cement that's a tough look oh they freak out on you what the fuck are you doing and that's thousands of dollars in damage unless you probably have to pay for them as well to redo
Starting point is 00:58:19 that I'm back in the fuck out of there and it's coasting I guess but what if you're all what if you're fucking your hand up they got you yeah you gotta get we gotta get the hose on that quick you're you're at their mercy unless you're close to help you out yeah that's tough they do it there's a guy who does who blocks uh there's a homeless guy or you know one of the street guy down in the village that blocks mcdougal street do you ever see that no yeah blocks it so it's like yeah he has clients that'll come in it's always like late at night later at night on mcdougal like right in front of ben's pizza okay he'll take trash cans and block the street just because he doesn't want people passing yeah he's in another planet and if he blocks I thought he meant like he like he like
Starting point is 00:59:07 would save parking spots no no he blocks where you can't turn down you can't go down mcdougal street at ben's there's like three city trash cans and the thing and some people have gotten out to like you know a couple of hot shots after a night out they hop out whatever and dude he comes with the wrath and fury of hell really oh what the fuck like he's great he's great he's on another planet this guy he's blocking the street for you know to keep demons out or something and when these like you know these like finance bro hot shots don't know what it is and they're like I'll get out he comes from the wings dude like fucking like out of the fucking out of ben's pizza it's like jeepers creepers fucking he puts them in their play all right they all hop in the back of an uber because they're like
Starting point is 00:59:53 just go straight while moving and they hop out and he's like oh fuck that I don't like that at all we're having a block party with znew yeah exactly there's yeah he's waiting for the rest of the party to show up that guy waiting for the comet to land um this one's from stormy how long does it take to drain your drain at my parents house our gosh think upstairs in the kitchen sink in the bathroom the bathroom's a tough one oh my god yeah you for years it was a nightmare they had it snake I didn't get it snaked they've had an order drain oh this and that I don't know what it was do you ever snake anything yourself of course yeah snake the couple of things snake in toilets go by go go borrow the snake from mr. O'Donnell and come back over and you do the hand you do the
Starting point is 01:00:41 hand one that you turn or you got one of the mechanical johns that was the hand one was the one that he gave us I believe you're just dude if you have to snake a toilet you're just knocking poop around at a high speed that's all you're doing kippy used to be a toilet snake I used to have to work the auger quite a bit I worked there for three years yeah the sink upstairs was a tough look also too now it's all nice but for a long time I'm listening we didn't have the stopper in our sink in the bathroom you know the just a hole just a hole wow yeah I don't know what happened that's like 1950s shit you just see no it was supposed to be there I know but it got thrown out or something the thing just went up and down like that nothing
Starting point is 01:01:25 ever popped up that's real trash yeah yeah the bathroom was pink at the time too and fully carpeted god damn it was a huge window in the shower um was it glazed over the glass at least or the neighbors could just see right in you could you have drapes and blinds in your shower yeah there was a little curtain there whoa look out take a peek but it was it's nice in like the fall when you're taking a hot shower and you have the window open feels real crisp I'll give you that yeah it's all right give me a nice breeze when my little niblet's around you're an outdoor shower guy you're down the shore people uh-huh did you see Jay Larson just built one our boy Jay Larson is that what he was doing built I was wondering what he was doing after
Starting point is 01:02:12 the shower I messaged him like god damn if that ain't because what's better than outdoor showers it ain't nothing also redid his dining room or whatever looks fucking fantastic that guy Jay you want to learn a little bit about class coming from trash and becoming classy Jay Larson check out Jay Larson's episode I think he has two episodes right yeah Jay's got two episodes and fucking kill it real sharp yeah he knows how to do things real well I like that yeah does it does this thing like that that's nice um but uh my dream today yesterday I think my wife was like repotting a plant or something and I think a lot of soil got in the dude I mean it's fucking jammed up and then like you're like you got the dogs fucking everywhere so like you don't have time
Starting point is 01:02:57 to like that got like pushed away for the day so it's just kind of like it's slowly drained down and then like whatever was in there is like stuck on the side of the bowl fucking and then I forgot to get Drano which like that stuff can I say something about Drano in those products that's one of the few things that works do it I always thought it wouldn't work oh they work fantastic it's like where's Billy I think I think it's the worst chemicals in the world yeah it's kind of like what we were talking about round up round up jammed a lot of people oh yeah that shit's gonna come back you know oh it's already coming back you gotta think that's going into the waistline sure the waistline yeah hey your sanitary line you should call it if you
Starting point is 01:03:39 want to be proper you want to pull a permit over here the sanitary line what I had for breakfast is none of your business um and I think it's like uh we use it all the time in New York you got to because all that plumbing's like stacked on top of each other it's fucking 400 years old that's what I'm saying so it's like you're dealing with problem yeah with me talk to city all you're dealing with problems from like fucking you know yeah the pre before the Declaration of Independence was before Nicholas Cage sold the Declaration of Independence before bronze could vote yeah I don't know what they were doing we're jammed up at the moment we always keep a lit we keep a big bottle and then it's like dump a third or a half or whatever so we always got a little laying around but I got
Starting point is 01:04:18 fucking caught my pants down let me turn you on to this they got crystals I don't trust that you dump them in there you you have to use cold water because it's hot it'll blow your bathroom up I'm telling you it's like the rock in there you gotta be real careful but you can hear them going when you put the water in there I do clean that out no it's like giving it a colonoscopy it's fucking yeah it's crazy how well that stuff works I don't get it doesn't make sense how it works itself down it's like a jello shot what the commercial with the clear little thing going through it works it works I gotta get some dude with a beard took a shit in his sink that's literally what it looked like
Starting point is 01:05:01 some guy who just shaved for the first time at 20 you dropped a deuce down the drain all right this one's from mope haven't had one red yet ever had more than one antenna on your car the cell phone johns yeah the little black ones with little squarely ones they were cool when you saw that that was a sign of oh yeah my dad had one of those on his jeep when he had to phone the car phone that was like mounted next to like this shifter that had a cable yeah hello uh-huh yeah fucking we had that calling an airstrike my my uh my step dad had a huge white suburban this thing was like jacked up big mud tires on it cb radio fucking this thing had it seemed at the time like 1500 antennas on it to where I'm like there's not enough electronics in
Starting point is 01:05:50 this thing to make up for the amount of antennas I think you had those poles to like make sure that like how high it was or something like on a fishing boat yeah like the outriggers yeah he had shit I don't I didn't fucking get I just remember being like what do you got going on in there here's a question something from the 18 oh so I'm all about I would love that the 18th and I thought it was cool at the time my mom hated this thing I thought it was like riding around in a fucking tank jumping over the back three seats this is like but you know he made a roll out at school he made a third row before third rows were a thing he got two captains chairs from like another car really put them on a box and then so this is before third row seating this couldn't have been
Starting point is 01:06:34 selling talking about like a wood box yeah it wasn't safe no no no no no you're sitting there like Captain Kirk oh yeah I did you get launched to the windshield at any you could go hyperspeed at any time if he hit those brakes I've seen him do a drop my roll uh yeah we cruise around there and listen to Bill Engvall heavy here's your sign which by the way shout out to Bill Engvall Bill Engvall was brave did you know anybody that had the boomerang antenna the V1 the limo stuff yeah no I don't think people had those regular regular cars did they maybe I knew a couple of caddies would have I knew a dude that had one there was no TV in there you know there's cell or something was that for the TV or was that for like aerodynamics
Starting point is 01:07:25 was that that was that to reduce drag wasn't a spoiler I don't know it was for a TV really yeah this kid didn't have a TV in there though yeah no it was real uh Billy Mays Hayes or whatever his name was major league oh yeah everybody had the vwb to with the Rolls Royce uh-huh shout out to Billy Mays Hayes okay but you do look you you wouldn't have an antenna but for sure like a little siren you can put on the roof who the fuck wouldn't want that that was big yeah we got you gotta get back to your police scanner after this yeah keep tabs on the neighborhood I gotta get back to the stakeout you have a badge on a chain ready to bust out training day style yeah these are all compliments I don't know what you guys are busting train hoppers down
Starting point is 01:08:13 it's West Forest you just said in four different ways kippy you look really cool that's how I took that kippy you look like a guy who would have that siren magnet I got beer I'm athletic yeah I have a good paying job some sort of authority it sounds like I got a car that's probably pretty sweet you just like it made my way I just bought four more of these all right let's boogie baby let's wrap it up guys come out to a road show come out to a show come see us get on a patreon we fucking love you's to death we appreciate you I love you I love you and we'll see you next week buddy peace

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