Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Guys We Fcked!

Episode Date: February 21, 2022

Kippy & Foley are joined by Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson from Guys We Fcked. Thanks for listening. Love youse guys. Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage  https://www.LadderLife.com/GARBAGE https://www.athleticgreens.com/GARBAGE https://www.BetterHelp.com/GARBAGE Subscribe on iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/are-you-garbage-comedy-podcast/id1499140700 Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

Stop the presses gang got a special announcement the middle-class famous tour is in full effect Get your tickies me the bald one the long hair. We're coming to a city near you Bring the squad out. It's a great way to introduce people to the show. You get to see some stand-up You get to play a little a yg with me in the gui-parino. It's a good time. Hit me up Guys are gonna be in Atlanta Tampa Orlando Pittsburgh Buffalo Detroit Denver Phoenix Salt Lake City Chicago Rose man guys. It's a great time Can't wait to see out there get your tickies now. Yeah Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage?

The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or Absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is our you garbage It's a little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out to grow to be classy Yeah, or to just a big old piece of trash I don't say I'm your hostates fully coming at you on a beautiful day down here at Anthony's basement Just realize I forgot the right one. My co-host is coming at you from right next to me He's the CEO of are you garbage? He is an international businessman. He's my best pal in the whole world

And I love them give it up for KJ Kevin biggie Smalls James Ryan. All right that now that was the first funny tody. I've ever heard Guys, thanks for tuning in as always. Please make sure you're right with you subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube And as you know those numbers are cooking. I forgot he bonus and have a mic this episode And then obviously the greatest website of all time www.patreon.com Sign up you get bonus episodes bonus live streams a whole nother podcast check it out Love that money and have a nice quick shout out to our producer short and or even though he doesn't have a mic

We love him to death give it up for T bone McMuffin Toby McMullin There you go round of applause He gives up his mic because gang we have two incredibly special guests here with this today They've both been on the show before we love them. You love them They have a brand new special out right now called all special day They are the hosts in the brains behind guys we flocked give it up for Corinne Fisher and Christina I know just like Jackie Kennedy I know what I knew there was gonna be a comment about

I should be giving you cucumber sandwiches right now Hutch keeps it real That's so funny because we were just saying that we were talking about the card store I was saying how cool it is that you're doing that. Meanwhile hutch is asleep eating or whatever Those videos I've seen I've seen some Instagram posts. Tell me that's that you're you're doing that without knowing it I do it without knowing I get up in the middle of the night as if I smelled smoke And I dart to the kitchen I don't remember until the next day because the next day I'll wake up and

If you look at my counter, it looks normal And then as you approach you see spoons in the sink that have peanut butter on them that I've been licking and then oftentimes You'll see a peanut butter jar still open in the sink. It's like a real throat I'll do all different kinds of shit. I'll be like beef jerky on the counter. The only thing it saves you It's all classy stuff. It looks like all Trader Joe's But still dude, that's crazy anything in the sleep is garbage I like that Trader Joe's is classy to you because I when you said that I was like, you know He's more of a key foods

I like my sushi a week old You got to bring the the cart back for a quarter But guys congratulations on the special this is absolutely fucking fantastic. Thank you valley gig Valentine's Day It came out. Yep. And what is the significance of Valentine's Day? What's the story here? Just a relationship, you know brand relationship podcast relationship dad We didn't put much, you know, it was supposed to come out on Christmas. Honestly, and Colvin ruined that All right, which reminds me. Yeah, you got Colvin. That was very Byron I know I don't know why I said it like that. We got you two Valentine's Day

And I got him in a wawa Love conversation hearts, they're they're they're literally awesome. I love Valentine's sweet hearts has taken them over. I think what right? Well, they mean these are different. They're different. Yeah. Oh those are the Niko ones those are the originals Exactly. I thought I got the sweet. The chocolate ones. Yeah, those are the Niko wafers. They were fucking. Yeah, I like those Mmm. These are nice. Thank you. This is very nice. Do you guys like Valentine's Day? Oh Wow I like chocolate We can see that

My kind of podcast I wish they were the sweet tarts on when I think of Valentine's Day I go back to being a little kid and who got to Valentine's This could be very good or very bad. I'm so stressed out He started therapy recently, so you're in for a bumpy ride We quit last week too, by the way. What are you telling cutting that? No, you quit? Yeah, I quit How many such he's such a he's such a liar. It's like nah, nah, nah. Yeah, I quit Wait, how many sessions did you go there? I went to two when I switched over to Sprite things are going pretty good

I don't want to talk about it No, I went I went since October. I feel like I got a really good handle on I'm telling you I think I got a really good handle on my situation my situation I got a really good handle as a toxic statement That's the equivalent of he only hits me when I'm drunk You gotta keep going Listen, this is what I'm gonna say. All right now. I've been working out with a trainer since December Yeah, how do you and and you didn't quit? No, I'm not quitting that

Okay, and I'm not going that because I was saying no, I still have a long way to go with that But with the therapy I realized through through therapy through work through working really hard on it for a few months Is that a lot of this stuff? I was just overthinking and as it is in my head in a way and they're not like real real situations And she taught me how to address those things. Are you having hallucinations? What do you mean? They're real not real situations, you know like they're a little crazy This is more of a patreon My mom just dropped a raisin brand watching this what the fuck man, I gotta see these people in real life

For the last two weeks every day That's kind of like therapy. Okay. Yeah. All right. That's very Jersey. No, I feel like I feel like I did it to where I needed it You only want a couple months you've lived a whole life. It wasn't a couple month October November December January I went four months. That's a couple of months. Who's a couple of months? Now we're doing this. What am I? What are we on crazy bills? A couple's two we all know that okay. Toby say something See how flustered he's got Where's those goddamn Helix mattresses when you need your relationship with attachments has gone nowhere though like you're You're getting stuck on shit. I just think you got to go back to therapy. You that's a rookie four months

Four months. You're not even cracking the surface. Is it and be honest be honest Are you scared of what you're gonna find out? No, I'm honestly not scared. I figured it all out I don't know if you Said that my life to quick this guy I've never witnessed anybody so speedy with therapy. I mean, I think there's a lot of people that go for a little while They're called I don't want to know what's in the box. Why are you staring at me like that? Wait, okay? Did you go on your own free will or did your fiance make you go that wasn't court-appointed? Well, a lot of times it was back court. It was

appointed I they started to put the screws to me a little bit where we do fact court on the patreon We got him well, we got him, but you know, we're trying to get him to lose weight now that this thing's cooking I need a paycheck. Yeah I can't Got it so I got him we got him with a trainer. We got him on like, you know a diet somewhat, you know But I wanted to do that. Thanks. Good. Good. I found the therapist myself I stuck it out and found it stuff like that. I was motivated to go and I'm telling you I went in there with everything now

Now let me ask you this. I told her everything. How did you tell her? Hey, that's a wrap This is just a couple days ago. That was how did you do it? Yeah, what did you say to her? What was her reaction? How'd you break up with your therapist? You dumb bitch You never loved me because I think we should see anything he said No, I just said hey, you know with my schedule and stuff like that Can't wait over here no matter what I say, I'm gonna be wrong. I'm telling you guys back to therapy I feel good. I I'm using this the tools that I've taught me there Applying it to my life and moving forward with the working out and stuff like that right because that is even started to make me

Feel better. Well a physical fitness goal. That's what I mean mental Yeah, a physical fitness goal is really monumental because it is it is a direct metaphor for like progress for bettering yourself Of course So when I say to you guys that a lot a lot of the stuff was in my head All right a lot of it was like things that that I you know I was I was feeling sorry for myself and making it worse than it was and I don't really have as many problems as I thought I did I just needed to start moving forward and and stop being lazy

I appreciate that Because that should be isolated and sent out to a lot of people on the internet Yeah, so there you go a lot of women too honestly just a lot of people in general. There you go. So that's why yeah I didn't know I was gonna be cold out it on the show. What face did your therapist make when you told her that you were quitting? Did she she didn't send me an emoji back? Oh, so you text message She's my heard you know what you would have heard you were to her to go Okay, I'm sure she has her opinions on it. All right, what's your completely valid?

I like how I'm not the bad guy anymore. I can I can throw my feet up on this one. I'm typically the guy screaming at him This is great. I wanted to talk about Valentine's Day What's your therapist doing for I Said if you know if I feel the need that I that I need to go back, you know, I'll be the first to reach out Which I will yeah, yeah, which I will if your schedule clears up. Yeah, I believe it clears up I mean he's gotta be he works two days a week. That's a lot. Okay What do you mean? We're always moving around doing stuff like walk into the subway and go into the elevator

Yeah, so so Valentine's Day. Yeah, so yeah back to my childhood The only kid without a lollipop No, of course not. What do you mean? Like Don Rickles back there or a tracksuit and stuff like that Oh, well, you seem sad about it. So I just didn't know I didn't mean it for it to sound sad But when I think about it, that's what I go back to that's where like cuz like I'm very nostalgic attached Yeah, I mean for lack of a better word. So that's what I think of it's actually the past the songs like something you Bring up in therapy

Something to dissect with a license Not anymore I'm standing outside of her office with a boombox over my head. I want you back, baby God no, but that fun of it, you know without relationships Yeah, when it was innocent when it was simple when you gave that now in the back of your head Yeah, you didn't feel like a bozo if so-and-so didn't you didn't get that Valentine, right? But it was more fun than I before putting all the candy together right not the car pronounced at Valentine I don't are you doing anything this year for Valentine's Day and spots

You're not going out with your beloved I I my anniversary was two days ago. So we do it was the seventh Did you purposely have it by Valentine's Day? So you right see for one? Yeah, I know I do stuff all the time. Yeah Yeah, you live together, but like Be on your toes be a little bit more romantic dress up a little of course of course and we've been doing that a lot more to be honest with you Which is really nice, but yeah, I'm sure I'm sure we'll celebrate it not you know Not that night, but like, you know the next a cheaper night. Yeah Don't start charging more on Valentine's Day You go to Gallagher's tonight you get a steak for the same price you get enough

They'll jack up the prices take your wife or your girlfriend to the place that me you and Toby go and get I didn't say I just use as man. I'm really getting it from all angles I can't buy a break I'm using as an example Things are inflated on yeah, well, they do a pre-fix Just so you buy Hallmark cards like it's all money anyway, but you know we we disguise it as like let's celebrate love Do you see it? Do you see it? According to Gilmore girls? There actually is a real historical like more meaningful Background to Valentine's Day, but I didn't look it up after I watched that episode

Boston probably involved what St. Valentine's Day massacre. I thought it was named after Well, no, I think There's a massacre. Yeah same Valentine's Day massacre. Yeah big mob hit up in the north there. Oh shit. Yeah, no chocolate net No, sweetheart's on those streets. Would you get upset if your significant other was like we're gonna go out the 13th or the 15th If there there better be a real yeah, I better be because I'm busy. Yeah, but it's because we're busy Have a show which we usually do honestly, so it's a big night, you know, it is a comedy Yeah, do we do you guys know what you're doing for that night? Yeah, I mean we're promoting our special there you go So you're working so you're gonna go out on another time

But there's a two-hour window before in which Dylan better fucking take me somewhere And I'm gonna be a lone masturbating so There's gonna be a live stream thing I'm gonna duck that it can for a couple of minutes If you know what I mean big guy That's great. What are you doing Kev? I just said, uh, I mean, I'm working. Oh, you're working I'm working, but typically. Oh, yeah, and you're not celebrating cuz you just had your anniversary We just do an average is yelling at him the way you were yelling at me. I

Don't know. He got married. So yeah Wow, wait, you are engaged though, right? No, I'm not It's been so long, you know I like it We don't fucks around I thought you're gonna fucking she thought you're gonna make it all easy peasy with candy hearts I will say Foley has given me more like it has given me more things and like little thoughtful Gestures than most of boyfriends. I've had like one time I was at New York comedy club

And I just mentioned I wanted a diet coke and he like went and brought me a diet coke And I that was very very nice. Yeah. Now granted. I was going to pick up my sandwich I was meeting my drug dealer It trips a trip. Yeah, you still got it That's a good thing he's gonna be here five minutes Yeah, so I'm not doing any and I don't think last year was our one year we didn't do it because we went out we went away for our Anniversary so it's like yeah, you know He just did a day spa. You guys just did a day spa. Yeah, that's nice

Did you enjoy it? Yes, I enjoy, you know Self-care, you know hitting the steam rooms the saunas The pools it's over there in Jersey. I would check it out. So Joe. It's called. Oh, it's like a bathhouse It's huge. I thought it was gonna make this little piece of shit. It's enormous. Wow, eight floors. I think my gay friends went there Yeah, yeah, it's like you can see the city. There's an infinity pool. Wow You walk in they take your shoes immediately Hand them your credit card and a guy on doing your shoes. Oh Oh

Baby, they're robbing us Jacked and then you Move quick over there. That's all I'm saying. What do you guys feel? I'm sorry. How do you feel about the infinity pool? You brought it up. Is that is that an end goal? Oh Beautiful. Yeah, I mean a place in infinity pool. Yeah, hippie. I'm always scared. I'm gonna break it Like I'm gonna follow It's where the water goes over it. Yeah, okay So I'm gonna break it cuz isn't like usually like a thin wall on that side. I think it looks sin

But it's actually it's just a wall. It's just like the pool then really just ends Oh, I'm talking about the ones that have the glass where you can see people swimming in them That's what I'm talking about the poor people on the outside of that glass goddamn just magnify you I flood the San Fernando Valley I put out a forest fire though, so it all worked out. Oh my god. Kip athletic greens athletic greens I'm gonna I'm the athlete a bunch. I know all about athletic greens. I'm not just they're not just a sponsor I'm also a client. Yeah, use it every day use it at the gym. Put the water shake it up Drink it throughout my workout feel great feel smooth. It tastes fantastic. I love me athletic greens He's a big AG one guy. That's right guys. It's like a super multivitamin

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They're absolutely fantastic and they're doing a great thing most number one requested thing that people ask for at home with shelters Is socks? Yes, and they're giving them away everything to make a soft seamless tag list has a luxurious feel and as a piece of trash I am it's nice to have something feel a little luxurious. Yes, sir. You know what I mean There's a pair of bomb of socks for everything you do They come in tons of options like comfy performance styles for every sport or activity that keeps you moving the t-shirts are made of thoughtful designs features invisible seams soft fabrics And the perfect weight so they hang just right. You know what I mean? So go to bomb is comm slash garbage get 20% off your first purchase. That's b o m b a s comm slash garbage for 20% off your first

Purchase bomb is comm slash garbage do it do it. All right. Let's give me some cues Yeah, guys, so as you know when you join the patreon, we were answer answer your garbage question on the air So let's see here This is from No Conte for old yams. Oh, that's pretty good because Jack Conte and Sam Yammer the owners of patreon I Think we should say one

Do you drive your car barefoot? Yep. No, that's illegal My must thank I can see how'd you doing that the way I also forgot how to drive though full disclosure. You don't drive anymore. I forgot I moved to New York I moved to Manhattan when I was 17 and then I just never was here anymore. Oh, yeah, I'll give you that So, yeah, you what do you do when you got to get back and forth to the store? Oh I take I take ubers everywhere That ain't in the city Toby, I'll tell you that Going out of the city in a car that's clean. He's out. Oh, we're a little dial seven

You know car service really caramel one time. I took up our service better than car mouth But yeah, my brother's in Pennsylvania. Really? Yeah They're nice. They're nice. They're nice Are you not talking about Kerry limousine, are you no not Kerry limousine No, there's like cuz if there's like caramel and then a step up from caramel is dial seven and the re I used like I dial seven is nicer To animals. That's why I choose them. Are they always old Lincoln town cars. Um, it can be like it's SUVs a lot So I love like an SUV because I just get I do a lot of sleeping on transportation Yeah, huh just driving with her knee. Yeah, I feel hot just

Away from seeing her to drag race We had a listener talk to me about drifting they like drift like all the time It's like their hobby because I was in my Mustang. I didn't realize Mustangs are death traps in the snow I saw this story line. Yeah, they're horrible brother. I almost died twice. I almost ran right into a semi truck Like it was I've never felt unsafe in a car my life. I love cars I love driving that fucking scared the shit out of me You have to to winterize a Mustang you have to get separate tires, which makes sense But you also have to put 300 pounds on the trunk because it's a two-door coop. Yeah, it's a rear-reel drive

Yeah, so you're all over so it's too powerful of a vehicle like you I was Yeah, you do all that stuff. No, I didn't I didn't have anything to wait it down. I was on the highway Like again, we lose my schedule, but I think I'm free You can put it where you usually did therapy you can get in her trunk It's almost the same thing listen No, have you done that stuff since then did you get to do time? No, I'm just I'm not taking that car when it's snowing I'm not gonna be driving it. Yeah All right, you also have to be a very skilled driver

Which is why I was thinking about drifting because that's the way you maneuver the car like when you fish tail in rear-wheel drive You got to go with the car You got to steer with the car when you fish tail in all wheel drive you go against the car But this isn't your for in the drifting now that you're talking to people on drifting No, we're not gonna catch over on the the northeast extension in the middle of the night No, well my brother drifts my brother were car people so like he was trying to teach me 100% all my might we have a 76 trans and we got a 68 Camaro. Yeah Uh, but he said like a skilled driver could technically get home in your Mustang in the in the blizzard. I'm like wow

Really? Yeah, if you're fucking cold trickle or something. Yeah, you have to really be like a fucking NASCAR motherfucker I just drove. Oh, sorry. You were about what is drifting? Queen Elizabeth joined us ladies and gentlemen. I literally don't know what you're talking about More champagne guys to me drifting drifting is like when a guy starts to get cold to you And then answers your text messages I've heard of tokyo drift like it's a I know it's car related, but I don't what do you mean? You can't do it in this Superb doing really is doing fishtails doing yeah, it's around. Yeah. Are you supposed to do that? Yeah, you can you can you got it

It's like a sport. It's like drag racing. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's a very similar drag racing in terms of the line They do this in Greece guys I'll be honest. I'm surprised your car doesn't have more aftermarket effects to be to be quite honest I'm surprised. There's no names on it. I said, so I figured you have my I got two racing stripes Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, that's really bad. Yeah, but that colors the car Gray, yeah, charcoal. Yeah, but like yeah, well, it's charcoal gray with white racing. Oh, I didn't even notice the racing Yeah, they're they're on braid almost It's a girl term and a boy term together you guys love Casey and Robbie's wedding like Knight Rider

You fucking like you blew by the after party doing like 80 walking the horn and disappeared Feel powerful. I love it. Christina's like my boyfriend driving around. Yeah. Oh, I'll get us when we got a gig in like Baltimore After the Saturday night show, I'm like, let's do this. We're gonna go home Rain no wipers I just had to drive us home from Syracuse in a Four of the six hours we were in a snowstorm. What I'm not good. We run into an SUV. Okay. Okay, because I have a key I was gonna say motorcycle to sound Really blew it

It was and I played a pretty good like I'm confident. I'm like I got this But there was moments where I was just like I want one of my guys do you want me to pull over? Yeah, because yeah, I mean there was like tractor trailers flying past. Yes. I voted yes and was outvoted by everyone I hate that shit. I don't like driving in the rain like that We went to get our Christmas tree and it was pouring rain and we drove up fucking somewhere up there Coming home dicey and irrational fear. There's somebody you could talk to about that. Yeah. Yeah irrational You could hire a professional buddy It's not an irrational fear. It's a rational fear

Spiders for you're afraid of the rain. It's a pretty irrational for you to drive in the rain. So's anya. Yeah So's anya I feel like she does I didn't get it We're being honest here All right, this is from this is from bernie sanders Uh When you're moving out of an apartment. Have you ever taken all the light bulbs with you?

I never thought about but a dirt bag move You're undoing like the ceiling Yeah, yeah, I know I don't take the blinds with I did just move I was in a place for 11 years. I left the blinds. I left shelves. I actually left furniture. They actually charged me for it Um, but I left a lot of shit. Yeah, of course I'll figure it out when I get there ice and all that old stuff feels so good when you get in a new spot It's yeah renewed. Yeah, I've I've never thought about taking the light bulbs But like it is not a bad idea now that I think about it

What if it's like one of those really long like the ones they're supposed to last for like 10 years the eco-friendly ones I would I would unscrew one of those I had light bulbs that turn colors that I took with me, but I bought that's yeah, that's that's a little different Because I'm petty as but still trashy. So I mean, were you shopping hot topic? What's happening here? I look like a neon mustang with racing. Yeah, I shop in hot topic with 13 year old boy. The apartment's all black like Now I see Corinne's point if you just put them in and they are those nice no expensive ones But there's something about the idea of after you move out your landlord coming in to show the new tenant And he flicks the light that's fucking completely dark. You're a fucking scumbag

It's very how the Grinch show Christmas like No light for you Or if you just want to like some breakup or something like that then I can get on board with that I smash like you want to do some petty moves. Oh, I love doing petty moves the petty moves. I'm always on board for yes Super glue the keyholes You're just giving me ideas. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, that's you can't do that. That'll fuck a place up No, we've got to knock the door down. Of course. Yeah, who cares. Yeah, not your problem All right. Hey, whatever Jesus Christ

All right, this one's from our boy Alex Tonello up in Boston Is it garbage to lie about your anniversary on vacation to get free champagne and chocolates? That's a given do that I have never done it, but Fair but most restaurants have caught on like for birthday or whatever They charge you for the cake or whatever that they give you because too many people were doing that That's how like accepted garbage that is Yeah, you can't you can't have a country of garbage one of life's purest joys is having a fake birthday party on a night

That's not your birthday party and getting a free piece of cake and getting like a whole thing That's insane. That's not the shirt talking. I can tell you that That shirt's definitely rented by the way. No, I yes. Yes, it is 100 percent. I've never She like fucking TMZ that I blow it up everybody. I don't mind. I tell everyone I don't I've never done it. He's getting he's getting real gossipy. I like it I've never done it. I heard the fat one you shown rivers I've never done it because I don't like attention and except for when I decide I like attention Um, but yeah, they for many many years they charge you for that cake

So it's just like so many people were doing it. You see you can't do it anymore Yeah, well you do it on your birthday or no, even if it is your birthday. No, I would I oh my god I hate when people do shit like that. I have I have fringe worthy to me It's just wait. So you won't do the fake birthday or you will crack I I think my point is like I will I would never shame anyone for doing that It's so it's fun, but I personally wouldn't want it done to me because I don't want the whole restaurant singing to me That's like Yeah, that's the worst thing when the whole restaurant gets down with it. What do you know? I yearn for love 24

Yeah, she's like every day. It's my birthday. Everybody's singing to me. It's my birthday right now guys Well, my birthday is next saturday february 19. It is doing you ever forget it world. Thank you. Happy birthday. Thanks I don't know. I think that's I think the more dignified they're not even dignified But the cooler move as you get older you should do it real quiet if they bring something over and light it All right, you don't want everybody singing. Yeah. No, that's it. It's awful and and and hustling some some all inclusive And you say it's your anniversary Just for a little more wet and some fucking dog chocolate. I guess I guess when you're checking when you're checking in that's all right I think you're like, oh, are you celebrating anything? You're like, oh, it's our anniversary

And they pour champagne for you at like the front desk while you're getting your room or whatever. That's all right I'm okay with that. They mean I would never do it because I'm gonna you know distinguish gentlemen, right? But I get it They made me a swan out of towels in Costa Rica because I wrote like in the thing that it was my birthday and I appreciated that Yeah, you gotta do it another country You can't be lying to Detroit. You know what I mean until you until you start getting desperate Then you're going into places like I got three weeks to live What can you do for me? What's the mini bar situation?

Make sure the oj's first squeeze Yeah, good question. Uh, love you, Alex. Yes. Um, this is Alex This is from Matthew first time long to the acronyms ftlt, which is first time a long time then they do Uh, f y o a f y o a y k have you or anyone you know had an inflatable hot tub Yeah, yeah, no someone I know in brooklyn has one in brooklyn. Yeah, I thought it was a great idea for the city That's all right. The city. I'll give you. Yeah, yours. I knew one in virginia in virginia Yikes

Where I would attend nascar races at the richman tracks the shortest track in all of nascar three quarters of a mile Yeah, they're doing short track down there They got the sprinters out. Yeah. Yeah, they do it Five hours before you get that track I have a blow up kitty pool in my backyard though in Manhattan That I I was that mostly for the dog though. No, it's for me. It's hard. It's heart shape. It's heart shape Oh, that's fun My dog doesn't like water. Do you have a hose to fill it up? Uh, there's no water source in the back

So I got to do a bucket or like Okay Cut it print it that's a wrap. Oh my god. You're putting out a barn fire. What the fuck just like seven people passing a bucket back and forth Hurry up the mills burn it What are you doing It's a wooden bucket too. I did something even worse actually because it was the bucket thing was so hard No, I tried to let rain rain water fill it up and then I bought chlorine tabs off of amazon And I was like, I'll just chlorine clean the rain water

You're making a chemical bomb. What are you talking about? The neighbors think you're making meth in the backyard No, you can't do that Just trying to clean my kid. No, did you get into that? Did you say that? It just didn't really work out and then and this summer but next summer probably dried out your skin terribly No, it's all right. I don't know what drying out your skin. I mean, I did you had to skin some mosquitoes out of it, but Couple of dead rats. I don't care about stuff like that. Yeah You got to be comfortable with vermin when you've lived in Manhattan for I've lived here for 18 years

Yeah, I don't call them vermin either. That's a little strange. Why that's what that's comfortable with them. I don't know There was a rat that was coming through my stove and I didn't want to kill them So I trapped him in I trapped him in a little harm-free trap and I brought him to a garden That's adorable. What he's sweet. I don't I don't like killing animals. I found a baby rat my old I know but listen, I don't like killing animals either. He was sweet, but I don't mind it. There was no need There was a simple solution to it, but a rat. They could bite you. They could get at you. No, no, no They're angry. No, no, no. He caught himself in the in the cruelty free trap So he wasn't gonna bite me. He just got a lit some peanut butter. It was closed and then I let it out

It's easy. You don't have to touch them or go near them at all Yeah, that's the point of the cruelty free trap. I got you I got you My wife tried to get us to do that. I still probably took somebody's dad away or mom away. You didn't think about that What? Well, I mean according to rat that too. They're all on the wall. Well, there was like three that I caught So I let them all out into the same garden. Yeah, this is the place you're in now. Yeah Well, first floor, man. Rats Lice is one thing

Rats are intelligent creatures, but you know, it's first. What are you talking? You're playing snakes. What's happening? I live on the first floor and I have an outdoor space. There's an excessive problem and I live downtown Yeah, everyone had rats. I had rats when I live in the first floor. Yeah It's worth it. Yeah, honestly. I love the east village so much. I love the east village so much. It's worth the rats Special successful podcast development deals You're killing it. I've had a lot of experience. You're you're fighting rats on a Saturday. We got the girls from rats. We fucked Rats we fucked up And you take you can't there's no humane way you take it to a park. It's just they're just gonna infest the park

Yeah, they're already in the park. That's some kids getting bitten on a juggle gym I know a guy who probably Was poking it or doing something to deserve it. He's doing something. He shouldn't have been doing that I don't like those squirrels. I want to go on record. I don't like those. Oh, they're adorable. You're crazy. No way I fed a raccoon with my hands in Costa Rica too. Oh, so cute. Oh, Costa Rica. Yeah, that's all right. If raccoons Yeah, remember the raccoons broke into my into me and Dylan's suite and then we started and it ate all of my Expense of mini bar food, but then we invited it back basically by leaving a trail and then we started feeding it cookies with our hand

It was my favorite part of the Costa Rican then the raccoons got diabetes I fucking love animals. No, any chance to get a raccoon broken to your room Yeah, I ate my mini bar food and then you started feeding it. Yeah, because you have hands, man You know raccoons have fucking hands. They can shoot guns And rats rats have hands like rats are gross man. I don't like any of this thick tail I just love they got that tails. I can extend tail is wild tail scale is wild. Yeah rats are just scary And that's crazy with the raccoon. You're nuts Jesus, it was so sweet. It was a mommy raccoon and then there's three babies

That takes you down in the classy point. You know that right? They went swimming in We had okay, so the room had a rat's in your oven. What the fuck? We had a we had a private a private pool for the room, but then raccoon. I let raccoons go swimming in it Uh, I picture myself like Pocahontas like just talking to the creatures and like, you know chatting with them. It's fun This podcast is sponsored by better help online therapy Relationships take work Everybody knows that a lot of us will drop anything at the drop of a hat to help somebody that they care about out But will you do that for yourself? Probably not. No, probably not this month better

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This podcast is sponsored by better help and a yg listeners get 10 off their first month at betterhelp.com slash garbage That's better help b-e-t-t-e-r-h-e-l-p dot com slash garbage do it Yeah, can't let's talk about ladder ladder life is fragile as we know you ain't lying You don't want to leave nothing to your family if god forbid the words happens Ladder can help. Yeah, everybody gets scared off a term life insurance. The ladder makes it quick. They make it easy No doctors visits. No nothing. Mm-hmm fantastic 100% ladders 100 digital Like you said, no doctors no needles no paperwork when you apply for 3 million in coverage or less

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L-a-d-d-e-r life.com slash garbage ladder life.com slash garbage now back to the show back to the show I did that. That's why I spent my quarantine hanging out with pigeons What? Yeah, go down the river We like animals and birds pigeon. Oh, I don't like I hate birds. Pigeons are just doves with these two seem perfectly normal Pigeons are rats with wings. I don't know No, pigeons are really intelligent and they're ancient forms of communication with carrier pigeons and stuff They're incredibly intelligent creatures. Christina loves them alone too. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Now we're getting now we're getting somewhere

I also found a 12 year old magician in australia that was teaching you how to get a dove to land on you And I'm like well doves are Doves are pigeons with gray feathers. So I can do that with that's not but no But it works. Did you try to train a city pigeon to land on your shoulder? Yeah, I have videos of it I told me I wore gloves I was the falconer. Listen, we're animal lovers too. We love animals too, but this is just crazy, baby It's just screwballs

We've brought this podcast who's screeching. Wow. Yeah, I might have to go back to therapy to tell her about this He rendered them speechless. That is impressive. I mean, I knew you were trashy, but like you do come off of with class Well, that's a big mistake. You're both very classy in a lot of regards I got a lot of sides. I'm an octagon. I got the Steve Irwin stuff With city with city Beth Yeah, vermin The pigeons will be considered vermin too But not the squirrel pigeons are originally cliff birds

Like they would hang out on cliffs and they were brought over to america. So they they kind of do what they come from What do pigeons come from? Um, I what I want to say africa I want to say uh, they originated africa there But they were in somewhere where there was a lot of cliffs because I remember I remember reading about that when I was learning how to get them to land on me and um It made a lot of sense that they are like dwell on these built on the buildings buildings. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. They got like do you ever then do you never see a cute one? They're always banged up

Like missing like a claw or like a warts on them or something. Some of them are a little like, you know Cross-eyed city. They're living in new york. It's not great at heart. They're cute But circumstances have dictated. No, they carry a lot of disease, but there you go Exactly you guys You know Joe schmo you mean the porters got more std's and he'll ever know so it's like, you know, who's more dangerous Had you guys have pet birds growing up at all? Yeah Yeah, my brother had one that accidentally killed because before we left for a vacation He had the food and he but he forgot to open the cage and put the food in the cage

So he left the food right outside the cage and we came home and the bird was dead He Yeah, I tore he was ter he was so upset. Damn. Yeah Perky's like the bar's a little bent Trying to get his head in the food was right in front of the cage. He forgot to put it in. I'm like, oh dude, that sucks Maybe that's the best person to be keeping pigeons. I'll say that That was my brother runs on the family And then you had one. We had a finch named ribo. Yes. Did he talk?

There was a girl no no no Tiny little bird tiny little bird in a cage. Who was it a muppet? You guys should get a parrot. That's like a toucan or something like that. There's no finches. Don't talk I don't know what the fuck a finch is Gorgeous, I don't tiny little bird with a red beak. You said they're really beautiful. Did he talk? I don't fucking know Got a tricksy, dude Listen, I don't like birds at all at all. Um, all right, this one's from luigi f-baby Do you ever choose the high c as your fountain drink at a fast food restaurant?

I've done it at the high c orange at mcdonald's because Yeah, yeah, actually recently when uh, because I was on keto for our special And then I went like balls to the wall that I hadn't eaten meat in like years I was like is that keto cuz fucking sign me up. It's certainly not keto. It's like the most sugar I went crazy. I was eating funyons and doritos and twizzlers like I went I went wild You're trashy with your food taste. Yeah, my palate is. Yeah, what is it? What is a balls to the wall order at mcdonald's for career and fisher? Um, good question Well, I mean I don't I don't eat meat anymore, but for this one night I did so I had mine you're talking to a convicted felon

Okay You do like ideally if you're eating all the things you eat a two cheeseburger meal large, obviously And then uh, like a chicken sandwich and an order of nuggets and oh and this is like, okay So this is this is trashy, but wait to two burgers and a chicken sandwich I would normally I would do one like non chicken nuggets and then one chicken nuggets I've gotten if I've gotten I've split a 40 piece nugget with a friend like that's easy. Yeah, that's no problem And then filet of fish, which is probably the trashiest item on the menu is arguably the best item people People don't eat it enough, but it's like so good. And that's what I eat now because that I stopped eating

I only eat fish now. So okay, it's so good. It was Andy Warhol's favorite sandwich play of fish. Yes He's the one who convinced me to eat it reading a book about But he called you one day not even joking. I was like if it's good enough for Andy Warhol, it's good enough for me But that and the pigeon facts is just Oh, yeah, you didn't know what you were gonna get today, but boy. Oh boy You hit us with that at the end of a statement and it's always so authority Authoritative they hit us with like a fact at the end of I love party facts

You don't like facts We're not a very fact but it's more Opinion based over here to break it down even further real quick just to step into the fat zone for a second McDonald's used to make their own orange drink and then started pimping it out the Iced to make it back in the day when we were kids. Oh, I didn't know that stuff was unbelievable It's not as good as in the in the fountain now You know what that makes sense because it does taste different because when I was a child It was my go-to because we were in I was everybody's got an orange drink and they had it at breakfast

Still you see get it all you get it right around the clock. Yeah good stuff. Oh, it is good stuff It's a good drink anything with drink after it is like I love Wild wild orange drink would used to be pretty tight back in the day. Oh, I never tried that I was always while I watch chocolate milk. Yeah, I'm pretty good Now while I watch chocolate milk shout out the boy and their breakfast sandwich bar none hands down one of the best breakfast Yeah, we were just talking about it croissant and I didn't realize that's my brother pointed this out Even like I always go to like those little heaters that they have on the counter But you go to the counter you go to the actual sandwich counter and they can pull one out for you at any time

I didn't fucking know that until a year ago and I'm like I'm living my whole life as a lie. I like having the The little little heat lamp on it. Yeah One side's a little a little bit harder. Yeah A little bit crustier. Well, I like it because it's like a rest stop I love when you can touch your own food in a rest stop and I just take it off like everything grab it and go I like that a lot. Yeah, they don't do that too much anymore You'd be able to grab like the personal pizza or whatever at like a fucking

Roy Rogers that rest stops still do it. That's the only place that you can find a Roy Rogers these days Yeah, yeah, I don't know who he pissed off or what happened. He was killing it. They fucking disappeared. They whacked him Yeah, and they were awesome. They were fucking legit awesome way better roast beef sandwich than Arby's Wow, I think it's way better 100% thick burgers in the 80s to fixon's bar. Yeah, that's my sense bar. Yes That's where kovac is Hardies hardies Is that west coast or south carl's junior south? I think but it's like hardies and something else are linked up carl's junior in the Say, yeah, yeah, yeah

I need something Are you a hardies guy? He doesn't have a mic. Why are you going? Don't you fucking bozo? So I can get their reaction All right, this one's from uncle uncle cracker barrel Perfect, that's really good If you're paying the bill at a restaurant with a credit card and leaving a cash tip Do you put the cash in with the card or leave the cash after the check comes back? My mother puts the cash in with the card

So the waiter has a chance to say thank you Oh, wow That guy needs to go to therapy. That's fucking nuts. I can't imagine that has not leaked on to his own childhood That's gotta be that seems so tacky when he when they give the card for her to run it the cash is in there The cash is for you put it put the meal on the card nothing wrong with that move I disagree but if you're if you're just sitting there waiting for a thank you. That's the part that i'm like That's a little weird, but why but they're gotta come back with the card. I the tip is always left They give you the receipt you leave the tip and then you leave

I don't know. I'm a big fan of wanting to them to know so I know you'll never play and to say thank you They're gonna know though. Who do they think left it a ghost? You want to have that little moment of hey, thank you mouth. Thank you so much Let them know that you get it. You know, they're doing it right I guess if you're leaving like a really like during the holidays if you do like a fun thing where you like tip $100 on like a $50 bill or something like that It's it's fun to like I get like see the joy But if it's just a regular like standard 20 percent to you're out of your mom

I never do 20. It's always 25 30. Okay. Yeah, you want to get that little thing. I'm sorry. I thought that was uh That was already established that you're laying heavy I'm sure the mom sounds like she's laying heavy too. I would assume you're not laying heavy if you want to And also it's not for you old school people like to do that because then the cash tips don't get counted Sure. Yeah, but my mom does that. Yeah, don't give him the cash and say here's your tip Here you go, sonny leave it in the book and leave like a fucking gentleman or a lady and you write cash on the receipt Yeah, of course. Yeah, that's always make that make sure they can't write anything in there What I don't like you do I was going to say this for hard feelings. This is a very patriarch content heavy episode

We were just at davin busters. Yes place Uh, I love your show and what you do is like I'll because like we pay with a company card, right? So like I'll leave whatever and then he Goes in tips on his own as well In addition to the tipping on the company card, but not in So like he wants to like this is for a me type thing. Wow, which I find I'm like you're you're you're you're undercutting the table, which is like you're going. Hey, they stink, but here you go

I believe in you honey. I've never been out with anybody that's ever done that Do you need a hoggo? Sometimes he's borrowed 20 dollars from me to give to them. That's that's hilarious That's listen. Listen, so he gets the hey look what's going on here? It sounds like something that you could be talking about in therapy. This guy's a fucking rat. That's what's going on Aaron our personal business I don't know what the fuck this kid drank this morning We're gonna have a fucking tea meeting after this episode On patreon.com. I'm going to hr after this. Yeah, you're looking at him fatty

I'll take your complaint everything available at three o'clock today That was two separate occasions On this trip alone and it is from the table if like that night at day On the table it stays in I'm tip where the word tipping. I think the table. It's just you Toby you Yeah, it was me him and Tommy's head you're shaking your head obviously the two people you're with are offended by this move You offended by it's from all of us The tip on the card is from all of us. You give an additional tip. I want to make this from me personally You might as well say you might as well say

Fucking rats But wait Since fully fired his therapist, let's just get into it now. What are you? What what does that do for you? I'm gonna do show big man. Are we gonna do sports or something? The question fully is gonna start one of those instagrams where he just like films himself giving money to homeless people Look how great I am Immediately after it back. Hey buddy that show biz give me that First of all, fuck you guys

Second of all It is from the table. It's just another nice little jet. Listen. I got you about you What's moving forward? I will I will put it in the envelope, but I want to know what the motivation is When you when you did it those two times, what was your motivation truly? Like what was in your heart? Thank you for the for the fair and honest question. I appreciate it The answer Is a move right when somebody has to take a drink before the answer a question it means they're trying to think of something Else that's not the truth. Yeah, that's why I did it

Do I know you want to make sure running out of the playbook here? He's got the manual what I wanted to say is let's go backwards chronologically the davin buster's situation We were in the middle of a snowstorm. They they took us late. She was very very nice Um, and I just wanted to give her something extra for that. That's all and the night but the night before Okay at maggie mcflies shout out to of them. There's a thousand of them in northeast new york. Um There was the same situation. I had gotten there late and she was really nice and I just gave her a 20 I agree how it looks putting it under the glass But you handing it to her directly. Yes, I agree

I did put it in the check or it was discussed to put it in the check and you said no, uh, yes I don't understand you're the only person I've ever gone out with because I'm tipping individually Okay, well, here's somebody who doesn't need therapy. I see what I did. I completely understand you to do it I'm gonna tip her more. You bald fuck Yeah, get petty with it. Fuck it. No I will I will I will amend that behavior in the future the next time it happens and I look forward to the time You believe that I look forward. I look forward to the time where I can prove that to you whenever that said time may be But I mean that sincerely, okay, so if it's a company card that means it's shared finances

Why didn't you just say like hey, it's a snowstorm. I think we should tip a little more than we usually do and he would I tip her. I think probably 30 35. I don't know. I got like fucking nine ip's to me. I'm trying to flex a little bit It feels good to tip especially in circumstances such as I waited tables for a super super long time Yeah, over tipping is super is really really fun. Yeah, it's fun. It's fun. We're not fighting you on that I'm not fighting you on the overtipping. I'm fighting you. I'm just fighting you. I'm putting it under your glass I'm still a narcissist at the end of the day fair fair. Okay. That's a fair response very self-aware response I wanted to know it's for me. Okay that these other three losers Hey, you know the guy who's actually running the show this is not from him

I remember that when you're when it's time to cut your paycheck, um Just imagine you sitting at a desk stamp. Yeah Your your your check comes along. I like to complain about every check you writes out Uh, this one's some of our employees and off a lot of money. Uh, this one's a home run. This is from tool Uh, haven't had one read yet When you are done vacuuming, do you walk over and unplug it or just yank it out of the wall? I'm gonna do one. I'm gonna do you one further. I press the button that retracts the cord and that yanks And let me tell you something and then it whips me in the remember when they hit back in the day

Yeah, remember when the fucking when the retracting cord hit You felt like Indiana Jones. Oh Ah Goodbye knots. Goodbye tango. Fantastic always yank yank everything. What kind of vacuums you're working with? Right right now. We got Dyson Dyson Fish, what about you? I don't know Christina bought it for me. I can't remember what it is. It's probably Dyson It was a it was a gift to me. I don't think it's a Dyson. I don't I don't think it was an upright though, right? It was uh, it's like a Dyson's an all right machine. It's a small. Yeah, like it's small and it has a wheel

It's not a Dyson, but it's nice. I don't know I tweet I tweet I'm like every day like you guys should make a vibrator. I have your hair I have your hair dryer right off. I have your hair dryer. I have your air humidifier and I have your vacuum Mr. One would they be able to get away with that or would they be would they get in trouble for something like that? I thought you make some magic wand. Come on. There you go Oh, you know, people start breaking breaking their balls about it. That is a fantastic idea because it is a really good company, man I want to see that guy who does the Dyson as like that, you know, like that man. That's like mr. Dyson I want to see him talk about a vibrator. He's gonna hot. Yeah

He's like I want to see him talk about a vibrator. Yeah, it's like Swedish or something. He could tell us a guy that owns a company He could sell a vibrator. It's just called a mr. Dyson. Okay. Yeah, I want to get one of those hand dryers in my house That's like that's one of my goals. You know what I do We're just talking about the air I wash my hand and it's the one that's like just like one funnel down the accelerator You can make fart noises. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a big hand dryer kind of guy Love and I hate the ones that are on the sink. Yes. Yeah, like a rest stop or something Or the ones that are just like bloat like they're at like rest stop I never even saw that it just it's like a fucking tube that comes out and you keep your hand at the sink and water just blows

It's oh, it's the stupidest thing I've ever seen since you're confessing It sounds like you walk into the janitor's closet. You walk into the wrong room Hold on unless I'm pooping in there. I'm done washing my hands at those things. I walk out and just fucking use hand sanitizer Oh trash. I do the same thing. Well, if it's really dirty Yes, uh, uh, New Jersey. They're all really dirty. They're disgusting. Yeah, I sanitize sanitize Sanitize once I'm at a porta potty I saw like a human piece of poop just sitting like on the on the edge And like I couldn't even wear those jeans that I wore in that porta potty again because I was so scarred by that experience

Yeah, wait, so the poop before you set that or after you set them No, no, no number one. I who the fuck is sitting down in a porta pot before you went Yeah, no, I saw it, but I had to like it was an emergency Like I had to get the pee out of my body and you were driving and like this was the only place for miles Like I had to do it. I was going to have like a medical problem. There was only one toilet there Yeah, and then yeah, and then also once you see the poop you've already been traumatized So might as well release the pee like like true True when I see like something when I see a gruesome scene in a toilet situation

That is like ingrained in my memory for months. I know I have trouble eating because I think about it Because you could watch fucked up videos online and it doesn't stay with you. That's not sure an isis video I couldn't eat. I like almost couldn't eat for two weeks. So I got to get in burn Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah, let's try that That's fucked up t-bone pull one up Oh my god, I will fall out the window Holy shit All right, let's do a few more here. Uh, this is from itchy. Uh, I mean our fans our pankos

Do you have any empty shampoo bottles currently in your shower? Yes. I'm a woman. Yes Hell no, I'm me. I'm all cluttered. I'm bad with that. Yeah I'll leave like a little bit left and then I'll be like, well, I'll use it one day But then I move on to the new shampoo and then I never end up using it Yeah, I've moved her in a couple times and there's a lot of bottles that are like almost She isn't like wasting things. I waste things. I'm a big waster. Yeah, I waste I waste paper towels I'll always paper towels in that all toast waffles and then put the butter and I'll wrap it in paper towels To get that butter to melt just like I want it. Oh, but what a waste of paper towels. It keeps the heat in

It sounds like a chef In fact, it is grin ego express That's pretty good. Yeah Yeah, that's all right Dude, where's jev report water if you're like already low and you put some water in there to mix it up That's all right What do you do with cold water I put milk and salad dressing to get a little bit extra

No, that's what you do. That's there's already dairy in the salad dressing christina. What are you talking about? Ranch dressing is a dairy product if you want to spice up a little ranch Yes, get a little legs out of it. Do you think the creaminess of the creamy dressing is coming from? Love No, I'm not putting milk in like an italian dressing But if it's like an already cream like a caesar or ranch you put a little milk in there shake it up That's what I thought. No, that's I first before she finished her sentence. I'm like this girl's putting milk in there Which probably wouldn't be that crazy. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

But we've talked about this But if you forget that you put water in the shampoo and then leave it there and then fucking you hit yourself with it It's freezing cold. It's fucking horrible. It's like getting bear spray in the face. Yeah, it's not good. That's true. Got a fun time Um, all right, this is from Preston. Uh, jevreware of on dutch trucker hat. No. No. Yeah, neither. They were Very 2000s. Yeah, very britney spears getting into parasolans car Well, I realized our ages and I realized you were could have been trying to be cool at that age I was I liked them. I didn't know where to find them Couldn't get my hands. I tried to get my hands on that and then hearty t-shirt. Yeah

I had an at hearty t-shirt. Wow My titties you have an affliction t-shirt. Huh those affliction without the other brand that was like at hearty. I might have had one Yeah, a fun dutch hat was expensive though. I couldn't have worked one at that time That's what put them out. Oh, there's a pretty good documentary on hulu or something on fun dutch hats About yeah, it's a wild story moving. Gotta get this kid out of the house It's our really good movie on pencils Uh, all right, this is from bkxc Uh, this is this is written from a male's perspective, but we'll switch it

Have you ever been on your boyfriend's shoulders at a concert and flash the crowd? No, no, but I go out on my balcony every night naked. So it's similar. What? Yeah, I've seen those instagram pictures Truth control so hard That's far away the next building though. Why is that crazy? I don't I mean from my perspective. There's no one around the bill like it Just I shower in my jeans. You're crazy. I think I'd be going outside naked on a balcony. That sounds like a therapy issue I performed stand-up naked at the creek in the cave. Yeah, what? Yeah I'm just saying it from from a parental standpoint. You know what people I don't want people galking at her. That's all

You're welcome But yes, of course My area so the only building tall enough is there's no residence in it yet Well, that's cool, but I will continue to go out on the balcony naked when there are residents in because It's a freedom What other opportunity does one have to be outside naked in a way that I respect the ability to do it? I'm on the 26th floor. Ain't nobody's stopping me. Yeah, I go in my backyard naked Definitely. Yeah, why wouldn't you that's just more laziness if I sleep naked and I let the dog out. It's not like a hot thing

What's it to experience stuff naked? It's fine. I wouldn't do it in case people are eating but That's considerate Yeah, that's all uh being naked's the best. Yeah, I'm getting naked is the best nobody's against naked I said it was just some of parental I'm not close to building you're not a dad. I'm aware of that. I was it was a spur of the moment What's that goddamn therapy? Taking heat for being nice No, yeah, I mean that is yeah, that's not

There's nothing wrong with it, but that is a shocking thing to do I mean, I don't think everybody's so many more shocking things and I'm like, yeah It's like a thing that people say is shocking that actually isn't shocking. I think is what I would categorize it on there Okay, did you ever drive topless? There was a girl in my high school that would drive It's pretty cool. She needed therapy pull up in a while while with that going. Whoa That's like Lady Gaga energy. Did you see the Lady Gaga doc where she just takes her shirt off mid conversation? It's one of my favorite, you know, you can legally women can legally walk around topless in New York City You can actually walk around completely naked and I remember when I was um when I was a receptionist at core

Yeah, real estate company. It was on the ground level and was all glass so I could see everything This girl would like walk by completely naked. I'm like, wow Damn, okay. Nice. Okay. Was she hot? She was hot really because it's usually not the hot ones who take a stance like that right It's 100% right the nudist colonies never have the people you want to see And yeah, you just where you don't want somebody to grab her or something like that Oh, that's sweet. That's all but I think that's kind of probably you'll look at me like I'm with a guy to go to grab No, I don't want anybody to grab her

You know what I'm saying I think that's kind of part of the poem all day The unbutton flannel doesn't help either. I love them, but it's good I think I'm scoring points with fisher I'll do one more and then we gotta get out of here. What'd you say? So my daddy used to dress He was uh cremated in an unbutton flannel hell. Yeah, really? All right, really, that's awesome. The flannel was cremated as well. Everything's coming up yet

They don't make you they don't get you christina balcony ready and then put you in Wait, why would they cremate you with clothes on? I I assume that you're cremated naked. It's more like yeah, right the cadaver No, you're not it's more it's more like human Oh, huh, you're there. You actually purchased the whole box that gets cremated It's the whole box that burns with the body Oh, the whole thing the whole the morning. Oh, really? I put my gi joes in there Yeah, yeah, well, I mean we we took a lot of the stuff out that we put with him But yeah, yeah, no, you it's a whole it's a special box that is meant to be cremated and the whole thing goes in together

Yeah, okay. Yeah, all right. That makes sense. Yeah, I like it. Um Sorry, I know you can't talk about death on this podcast it obviously therapy isn't working here No, I was I was taking I think I still would want to choose to be naked I would want to be naked in that the more the most natural when you want to be naked Because then you're giving someone an extra job because they had to dress you for the wake and then undress you again Who's going to clean up the people? Yeah, they had to turn you over I want to go naked or be planting a tree like people are starting to do now

They put in a little pod and you become the tree you can become fireworks, which was my wife's what that was my fucking boat Which is was a complete garbage That is garbage That was my boat. That's amazing. My boat was fireworks. I could still do it I have we all you know, we divvied up the ashes so I could I could do fireworks with mine 4th of july big man I'd take out baltimore Some of all fears All right, this one's from zane. Uh, never had a question read anyone in your family born outside of a hospital

He said I was born in the backyard I don't think anybody Yeah, no one in my family was can't think of anyone. Yeah No I thought for sure you meant that it wasn't meant to happen to wherever it was Yeah, I mean no for sure that's I mean, I don't think it was meant to happen High school basketball game or something. Yeah walking through our coals A water broke

A burlington go factory first Oh, man, if you're born in a burlington man, you're set up for doom. You're fucked. You're not gonna do well in the SATs All right gang guys, thank you so much for coming to sit with us. Thank you so much. The special is out right now. Yes What do you want the folks out there to know Our special day youtube.com slash guys. We fucked without the you and fuck check out guys We fucked on the luminary app or wherever you get podcasts. Yeah, it's a wide release now So you don't have to pay you can complete garbage check it out social media guys. We fucked without the you and fucked I'm at christina hutch and I'm at philanthropy gal

You guys are the best. We love you to death. Thank you so much. What do you got for him? At kevner and comedy on all social media check out our tour. We're on the road all over the place and Patreon.com check it out. Yeah. We'll see you next week. Peace. Yeah