Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Heater Etiquette w/ Kippy & Foley

Episode Date: February 26, 2024

Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! Through the Roof Tour Tickets: https://areyougarbage.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/ PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Pretty Litter: https://www.prettylitter.com/garbage Sheath: https://www.sheathunderwear.com/ Promo Code: Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

Like, you know most of our parents are on weed now, right? But what about a chubby 16-year-old Hank Foley getting grounded for two weeks for a nickel bag of stems and seeds? What about that? Huh? All of a sudden, it's cool, because you got rheumatoid arthritis. Is that the game we're playing here?

Like, I advance that I've never touched drugs in their lives, and now they're popping gummy bears left and right. And now they got just a little CBD. Then I look at the bottle, I'm like, that's fentanyl. What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?

The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is R U Garbage. So that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that I think you're gonna be classy.

Or it's just a big old piece of trash. I'm your host H Foley coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Tooties in the new edition. She's upstairs on the roof. See, that's just a big old piece of trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash trash from across the table. He is the CEO of RU Garbage. He's an international business man. He's my best pal in the whole wide world, but I would not hesitate to return state's evidence and get no witness protection program. You're going to need it big fella. Oh, we spot your ass from a hundred miles away. Give it up for KJ. Kevin James Ryan. What up gang? Thanks for tuning in. As please make sure you rate you subscribe on itunes full video available on YouTube And as you know those numbers are through to row smoking hot looking baby Yeah, and I'd be remissed if I didn't mention one of my I know my personally favorite websites Wikipedia

No Patreon.com Go over there you get up to two bajillion hours worth of content. That's marketing terms. Here, it's a bit of a party over there. It is. Five bucks a cup. Five bucks a cup.

That's pretty good. Five bucks a cup. Or ten if you want to go on a bathroom and party. Let it kick us over there. It's popping after eleven. Come by. Sign up over there, you get bonus episodes every week of AYG. Let a chick swim in there. It's popping after 11, come by. Sign up over there, you get bonus episodes every week of AYG, we do hard feelings every week,

which is a whole nother show. It's a good time, and then hours upon hours of other videos that we shot, vlogs, stuff from the road, behind the scenes, down the shore, the whole Disney, Disney, Folly's first limo ride, the whole nine yards. Woo, I like the prettiest girl in school on that. And do yourself a favor.

What's that? Get over there to RUgarbage.com. Oh, I've heard of that. Got to through the roof tour cooking. Ooh, try the roof. Adding shows. Adding shows, show selling out. It's a good time.

Get them tickies, gang. Let's hang. First leg is up. Please check it out. Come out and see the boys. And how about a nice quick shout out to our producer? Extraordinaire the magic man makes us all look good works the ones the twos the threes and the fours you cross in the fees And that's the eyes give it up for my number two my my other best pal in the whole wide world

T-Bone McMuffin Toby McMullen what up boys a big old saws each on what up T-Bones? No We're open for business speaking of witnesses. you know what's something you could never do? What's that Toby? You could never be one of those guys on 4 4 40? Sure. I prove you're wrong on that. I think I got a 4 8 in college. Is that possible? 4 4 40. That's four orders of only drinks. Four orders of drinks for my orders only drinks under 40 minutes Of the 444 deal no no no You could never be one of those witnesses on 60 minutes. That's all black in the silhouette you got your two you're too Recognizable, I would never do that. It's never understood that you know who it is if they know you they know you man Especially if you're here if you're leaking about like there was three guys there and the other two were in jail

You're like so I was here when Jimmy shot Tony like hey fat Sal they know what you all right So you sure they won't know it's me Jimmy Baclava Never man. I never said that too were like I the cartel does it sometimes We're like behind the scenes with the cartel and it's like some you know Journalist embedded with them and they're sitting there and I'm like, what are you doing? You're not showing street signs and shit. Trying to say it about anonymous saying shit like, I was his neighbor.

Yeah. They say an undercover boss dude, you'll get guy. Which dude undercover boss. When the chainsaw comes out. Is, have you seen that recently? I'm a fan for trashy TV. I get undercover boss when I first hit was crazy, but now dude they show up I mean the fake wigs them. I'm like, and they're always like hey, this is Jimmy

He's trying to switch they always come up with like a documentary to throw him off the set like a middle-aged guy Yeah, and he's like oh, it's usually like he's trying to crispy cream He's transitioning to like no a new career or something and I'm like dude if this guy with fake glasses a fake nose a Bad wig and a weird outfit came in. I'd be like I ain't working with him You know I would I would you got Mrs. Doubtfire run in the forklift. Yeah It's not even as good as Mrs. Doubt. Mrs. Doubtfire was a classic brawn You would think you would know if you like at this point you're aware of the show Yeah, sometimes it's like a 23 year old kid like fucking side-eye and he'll be like,

buddy your nose is melting over the deep for iron. I'd be kissing his ass. What do you mean? I'd be Johnny on the spot. Well, they always, yeah, they always get in their sob story of like, then my mom got shot in the head and my sister... I'd be making shit up on the spot. And then at the end they're like, and sometimes the GIFs. So if you haven't seen the program, the CEO of a big company goes in, works in all the different positions.

They've seen it! I'm just letting them know. What the fuck? The bozos and the homies, they know what's up. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know if, I don't think everybody's got cable if I'm being honest with you. And then they tell them a sob story

and then at the end they give them a big gift of like, hey, you know. Like a million dollars or something. Dude, I've seen some being like, we give you a $1,500 and gift cards to the restaurant. You're like, oh, what the fuck? Taking my house. I don't need surgery.

I don't need more mozzarella sticks. Make with the cheddar, Daddy. I've been stealing them for the last two years. I eat here for free already. Kick rocks. Yeah. You mentioned 444, which got the engine turning. Might have mentioned this to you. Not really sure.

Was talking about it with somebody not that long ago. Brought up a little American institution that runs by the name of Denny's. Okay. And let me tell you something. Go to and college for the sampler. They did the onion rings, the chicken fingers, the wings, the mozzarella sticks. Man, they really... I don't know if I've ever... Denny's maybe won two or three times in my life because to me that was just a diner and we always had local shout-out to Suburban Diner on Street Road with the Great American Diner. I don't know what... I don't know how they're banging these days but you used to find one in a small town in the suburbs. They were run like Michelin star restaurants.

They were unbelievable. Sure, I get it. Yeah, we just never, we would never go to that. It was just like the national, why go to the national chain when you got the real feel? You know? It's where my love affair of honey mustard started. It's the first and last time I ever dine and dash

was at a Denny's. Really? What? I was in high school. It was like scumbag. No, I respected he did it to a national corporation rather than some, you know. The hardworking people?

What if undercover boss was in there that day? Somebody had to pay for that. He comes out chasing him down the block. Literally exactly what happened. Oh shit. Yep, we were there. It was a bunch of Ski-Ve Stoners. Did you go one way and your parents went the other way?

How did you guys actually break that? On the count of three, scatter! Everybody lamb it! Literally. It's the cheese! Not far off, dude. What? We were sitting there, a bunch of Skeebie Stoners,

really went to town. Chalk the milks all around for the fellas. Man. Man, I can feel the dry mouth at that table. Just. I'd see a table mouth at that table. Just. I'd see a table you guys walk in. I want to kill myself. Hey, take it easy, big guy.

Jesus. We're going to double. It's a family program. The getaway driver stood up from the bus, stood up from the table, knocked a full glass of chocolate milk on the floor as he was getting up. Just so bad. We all get up. Just so bad. We all

get up, we're making our move to go. Servers in the back would ever empty Denny's. We walk as we get outside the door. There is a gauntlet of the most grizzled old Denny's waitresses you have ever seen sitting on the sidewalk, smoking cigs. I've been- I've been waiting for this, Denny. Looking for trouble. Oh yeah. The girl puts it out on her arm, just fucking cracks her neck. And it's like, let's go.

Let's dance, pretty boys. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Give him a five second. Let's start. Let's make it a challenge. Dude, for real. We got her out. We had parked in the back, backed in.

Did you go in with this plan? Yes. Oh, that's crazy. Why? Because we were all broke. And you were hungry. Yeah. What are we going to do? Where. Oh, that's crazy. Why? Because we were all broke. And you were hungry. Yeah. What are we gonna do?

Where were you living? Were you at home? This was in St. Pete, Florida. Wow. Yeah. Let's just go to your parents' house, get a sandwich or something. Because I was on drugs.

And they don't have chocolate milk. I want to feel alive. So we got around the corner of the building and we just hear this one waitress go, ah! And we all stuck. Man, St. Pete, Denny's waitress chasing you out of the door. God, I'd rather, I'd rather.

Man, I'd rather the Terminator after me. I can see like two of them on a jet bike in the canal. One jumps off on you. I get toward the corner by the getaway driver smoking a heater by the car, and we're screaming, get in! I picture her tactically cutting the angle. You know what I mean? Like trailing up to get to intersect them.

Like an outside line back there. Yeah, fucking spying them like, I got your fucking coming across. So we dive into this car, peel out, we're dipping out of the parking lot as the manager, red tie a flapping is running, Terminator style at the side of the parking lot as the manager red tie a flapping is running Terminator style at the side of the car and I'm just sitting there like oh my God what have I done there's like seven waitresses long story short though the kid who was driving was the only 17 year old in the county with this kind of car. Oh yeah. Caught him instantly. A pink cell. Yeah. The system you guys got busted. He did.

No, really. I'm really leaning on the statute of limitations. Did he rat on you? No. Huh. His mom footed the bill. But next time we're done, we got to go to that. Go to that Denny's. We'll have an ice meal. No. What? No. Why not? I never go back to the scene of the crime. Then there's a gonna think I'm in on it I'll get pegged as the mastermind of this thing 20 years. I've been looking for you for 20 years It's the chocolate milk Ponzi scheme, and I'm gonna be ways your buddies at man T bone. Hey man shit happens I gotta pass only time you ever did it. Yeah felt bad after horrible lesson learned indeed worst thing you can do Well that's stab a guy Got it coming you got it coming I uh two of my two of my dirtbag buddies who shall remain nameless had we're frequenting a bar a local a local establishment here in New York City

And they were hanging out there kind of dating the wait or the bartenders and they were like, you know It was very every bit was like a hang for them. So they were in there too, but two of my two buddies went in there and, you know, I think they'd ran up a bit of a bar tab and kind of, you know, as one does, and you know, I don't think it was intentional, but like blacked out and left and didn't settle off the tab, but they were like dating the, you know, whatever. So someone covered it cause they were like,

oh, they'll be back tomorrow. And like, you know, I'll just, you know, I'll jump on the tab and he left without paying it. And then they kind of just like iced like what some dude paid for it, like like the bar manager or something. And then they just iced them. It was like 170 bucks or something. They just fucking they were like, I'm never answering that call. I'm never seeing this girl just never going to walk down that street again. And a kid with her dude, two years later, I'm like, let's just fucking go in. Everything else was closed or packed years later I'm like let's just fucking go in everything else

was closed or packed. Let's just fucking pop in there's no way they remember you guys. Dude I we walked in we made it three feet in the guy goes get the fuck out of here. I was like fuck. Now I can't go back killed by association. One thing I'll say about you when we first met me. Yes, up until now. What is I've never met anybody that was so careless with opening a tab and forgetting to close it and leaving his debit card, which you had one card. And I know there was no

money on it, but like the other night we were we were Brooklyn comedy club doing doing some spots shout out shout out the old man hustle over there love it there and I was gonna I was having a few pops normally I do I do cash boom here you go but I you know I put my card down and I jumped in the in the Uber to go home my god I got it for panic forgot my card told the guy to go home, I got it, I got it, panic, forgot my card, told the guy to pull over, ran in and waited. This guy, like a book of matches, he's left credit cards at bars all over.

All over North America, dude. I literally remembered, I get it in a couple of days. Yeah, there's two still in Vegas, from the last gang fest we went to. Crazy! That I was just like, dude, the one was like three blocks away. And I'm like, I ain't walking through. There's certain things that you let roll off your back and you're a crazy guy.

And you might say high strong, high strong anxiety. Just riddled with it like the little E on a guitar. Like you'll lose your wallet somewhere. We'll be in like Indiana. We were like, I can't find my wallet. All right, whatever. You guys ready? I mean, I'd be calling the FBI. Yeah, I don't care about that. I check, I reach and grab my back pocket probably 10 times a day to make sure I have my wallet. You just like, like your Paris Hilton.

I know, but like you still think you're not gonna. You look like a Perez Hilton maybe. Why? Shout out to both. You think you're not gonna get the money back. Like worst case scenario is I leave my credit card at a place, they close it and add the 20% cartoony, which I was, I'm getting off cheap.

I was probably gonna dip them more. These dumb bastards could have juiced me for 40%. But you would do that when, like you had, for most of the time that we were in New York together, you just had your debit card. Yeah, I only got a credit card during this show So what would you do for the next couple of days for money? Well? I was a TD Bank guy you could just walk in and they print you a credit card

They print you a new debit card right away like license plate. Yes. Oh, so it was like that's crazy I was just like all right as long as I have some cat I remember there would be times where like I forgot my credit card and I was like, all right, I just, I would hit up you or my roommate, be like, yo, let me borrow 20 bucks. I have to go all my, like, so I can get to work. I got to borrow, you know, I got to, all my lunch break.

And I used to work right next to a TD bank. So I'd pop in there and just be like, yeah, I need a new car and sit down, boop, boop, boop, boop, they'd fucking hand it to me. Right, too, you're back in biz. I knew you owed me a 20. You're in the pocket for a couple of days. That slide. What? I don't know. You got nothing the pocket for a couple of days. That slide. What?

I don't know. You got nothing. I got a couple of things. Some sunglasses. You're on the, no. You're on, um, you're in the red. If we're sitting here. With you? Yeah. Yeah, right. How am I in the red with you? Heaters? Heaters. That's, dude, Heaters this week. That's wartime, dude.

No, this isn't wartime. You show up to the studio without Heaters this week. That's wartime dude. No, this isn't wartime You show up to the studio without heaters and then I'll have like six and what you started do like a real snake But I respect the garbage move you'll go over and when I'm you know, I'm low on he knows how many So you want to go and have a second goes you only have one left So he's keep an inventory on my heaters and what he does like a real dirtbag He knows because we were on the same heater schedule like oh, you know He's keeping inventory on my heaters. And what he does like a real dirt bag, he knows, because we're on the same heater schedule, like, oh, you know, we'll pop out,

we'll do one after a heat or whatever. The whole go over, whole take, whole get his own out in his hand and then go, you wanna go get one, you wanna go have one. So then I'm smoking my last thing. He's already, he like the Federal Reserve with these goddamn things. Man, you're half right, I'm way ahead of you.

First of all, I have an empty pack where I stash a couple when you're not looking. You're such a dirt. Just buy a pack of cigarettes. That's no fun in that. There's no fun in me not having heaters. What happened to honor among steves? Yeah, there's none.

And there's also- And you're mad at him for running out on a Denny's. You're stealing from your best pal. That's a different psychological. You owe me stealing from your best bet. Different psychological. You owe me 200 bucks in heaters. I also have several loose heaters scattered around Tooties, in case of a jam up. So if I die, make sure you check the walls.

Well, a little inheritance for you boys. Have a smoke on Uncle Hank. Is that like Janice Sopro down there with the metal that that there? Yeah, you're uh... You've been r- and you're typically not that guy. You're typically flush with heaters. Not that guy, pal. You're not that guy, pal. You're typically flush with smokes, but I don't know what's going on.

Trying to get away from him, man. Away from the heaters. I don't know. Yeah! Well, you're not a cherry picking you or you got to show cherry picking. You're coming in and smoking the hooks and you just as much as me. But I will say this. Never dined in dash. Very disappointed in you. Be honest with you. Wow. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. What an all time deflection. You just tried to pull off. Thank you.

Like we work on a notice, you goddamn senator talking about the undercover boss. I look over here in a mustache. Kip, what's talking about pretty litter? Shout out to PL. I'm not just a spokesman. He also poops in. I'm also a client, because my little baby uses pretty litter all the time. We love it.

Man, when the bird found out that we got a pretty litter, she's like shipping. That's hoity-toity stuff. They just re-upped us. I got it at the house, man. The cat loves it, she loves it. Plus, it gives you an alert if there's anything going on in the old urinary tract.

Yep. You get to see what's what. Kidney stuff in the whole nine yards. Listen, if you love your pet as much as I love my pet, do yourself a favor get over to PrettyLitter. Step it up baby. Yeah PrettyLitter has crystals in it. The science band is there's crystals in it in whatever the mixture is. The change color if there's something in your cat's peepee some potential illness so you can get ahead of it. That's how we found out we had to take her to the vet. Yeah I know it's like so it's like and there's a thing if it's yellow yellow, if it's red, if it's blue, whatever,

it changes colors, you go, oh shit, I gotta jump on this. And then, you know, anybody with a pet, dog, cat, parakeet, whatever, when they start getting you, you start closely monitoring that stuff. Like, ah, they didn't eat this. They were a little weird on that. So this gives you the, this gives you the red flat

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That's PrettyLitter.com slash garbage to save 20% on your first order. PrettyLitter.com slash garbage. Terms and conditions apply. See the website for details. Let's go. Kip, this is Sheeth. I like Sheeth.

You love Sheeth. And OG in the podcast game. Yeah. Been with us since Jump Street. First guys that take a flyer on two young guys out on their own. Shout out to Sheeth, baby. Gang, if you want the most comfortable underwear

you have ever put on, do yourself a favor, get over to Sheeth and scoop a pair up. You like separating your nuts from your wiener? Sure, we all do. If you can medically. They invented it, the technology. It's listen, ladies out there or guys out there, whoever, you know, if you got a guy in your life,

a buddy who you wanna, and you got a couple bucks, you know, they're, you're talking high quality shit here. So it's a, They're hog on them. But, and you wanna, you want to really fucking change how someone sees underwear. I, I did it for my cousin. I was talking about it. He's like, do they really, this was two years ago. Do they really work?

I go, buddy, I can't, I'm not going to be able to sell you on it. I logged in. I literally went to sheet promo code garbage. You know what I mean? You got to wait at my beak on the back. Sure. I sent him like three pairs. Dude, I get a text next, next week. Dude dude these have changed the game. I can't go back

That's how good they are cozy so go to sheath underwear comm use a code garbage you get 20% off your first order plus sheets underwear 100% money back guarantee there you go that sheath underwear comm promo code garbage go to sheath underwear support your Support the show support your balls. We love you. I've been dine and dashed on Now who's got to cover that? I chased the kid down. It was St. Patrick's day. I was at the waterfront in our house Yeah, you've told us but who's got to cover that not the waiter. Yeah, but what's there? That's not their problem if you're dead is you let him go I know no no no no every restaurant. I've ever worked at, the company paid for it.

It wasn't on. You weren't left holding the bag. If the manager was cool. I don't know. I feel like it's this time. It's illegal for them to charge the service. Yeah, that's like someone coming in with a gun and being like. Bring the law into this?

OK. Listen, there ain't no law on brunch shift. I'd like to cite Miller versus Carlos Jr. from 1988. Danny Miller. Working a Brunch Shift. They will walk that damn bold. You're I guess you're both right. Both. In some cases it says, Mm hmm. State and federal law may require

this is just goes deeper than I thought. Federal law state and federal law may require servers to pay the bill when a dine-in-dash Incident takes place the only exception would be if the bills total Causes the employees wage to drop below their state minimum wage. That's fucked up if you're running a business out there I understand times are tough, but you're gonna take 120 bucks from this fucking server buddy They charge it most of the places I've worked at, they charge you for the credit card processing fees. That comes out of my end.

This is my deal, Jerry. My deal, Jerry? Well, it's not. If anything, you should just be, you should have to pay the cost. You shouldn't have to pay the street value. But you're paying wholesale. You gotta go back and figure all that out.

You should. You're counting chicken fingers in a Cisco box in the back. to go back and figure all that out. You should count chicken fingers and a Cisco box in the back. I was a young impression. It wasn't my day. The only thing we ever came close to doing that is we go to Ponderosa. We pay for one plate and everybody would eat. You never went to like a hot bar and fix something up and maybe don't get over to the seat in there. Nibble. But I don't even really do that in the grocery store I'll check a grape a hot bar nibble is still stealing hang up our nibble every once in a while I don't HBN no way not gonna do it

Sesame chicken and some mac and cheese I had combo I have a weird real weird thing with stealing like that and I not that that's deal But it's like the same real weird thing with everything. No, you ain't lying But yeah, no apparently that's fucked up Even though it was such clause in most states employment since in most states employment is at will the employee can be fired If they do not do as told Do as told like they have to pay it and if they don't they can be fired. Yeah, that's insane The fuck are we doing? This is goddamn America. Yeah and this waitress was going to Eckerd College. She didn't have a future anyway.

I didn't ruin anything. Would you talk to her? Yeah. Oh man you got to know her first huh? I mean that's a sick little twist aren't you? I like to watch the light go out in their eyes man. Your dirt bag. Yikes. You were chatting her up after all that.

I was yeah in about 30 seconds into talking to her I was like what are you doing? You're gonna blow the whole thing also now. I don't know what Now I don't know what's going most states in the US if not all have laws against making employees pay for business losses Yeah, it's a right. That's it. God damn right. Oh, I'm saying that's what it should be if you're making these fucking these hard work and you know Waiters and waitresses pay that, that's fucking insane to me. I feel restaurants in general, man. They give two, I mean, the whole system, it's like everybody's eating for free usually, or the staff meal or whatever.

There's a lot of, what do they call that, leakage? Yeah. Spillage? Leakage. No, not leakage. Maybe he's a leak it don't over About to take it dump over Yeah, wait a second in the amount of times that you worked in restaurants buddy You're in the red

Yeah, never never touched a dollar would never do that, but I'll tell you what in terms of restaurant thievery I mean you're way ahead of me, dude. Yeah, wow, that's true. He's a couple of fucking chocolate milks. Food wise. Food wise. Which is all I check too. But that's hard cash you're taking from that guy.

That guy's gotta replace that. His bottom line. Yeah. I remember I was working at a restaurant. Man, you sandbag and son of a bitch. You stand here on your fucking soapbox, yelling at this fucking high teenager for stealing some malts.

I was doing this at 40. Dude, yeah. I was hungry. As a starving artist in the West Village. You were 388 pounds. Dude, I didn't. Man, you are, you are a different kind of crazy, my friend. I did that all the time, man. Thank you, Toby.

I'm over here Googling, lawing, fucking agreeing with you. Meanwhile, you're still- You got the chicken tender bandit right in front of you. Woo! You went like, just sit in the tier of a miso kid. I didn't want these nachos. The double ring up. I would, no, I'd never do double ring up.

Usually what you do is, you know, you make nice with the kitchen guys and they they hook you up with whatever you whatever you want. But yeah, since I was since a young age, it's got to be 180 grand. Yeah. Easily. It started at it started when I was a kid at my first. They made homemade cannolis in the back and I would eat it out of a spoon in the, out of the ricotta cheese thing. They were so good.

But I love it for how the cannoli started. I, yeah. Twist it. Yeah, I would literally work at a restaurant job, get fired, lose weight, and then I would get a new one. And blow back up. When you get a new restaurant, man, it's like, it's like having a new girlfriend.

Everything's new. The flavor profiles are new. And dude, I worked at this one place and they made everything homemade. Cheesecake factory? They make everything in-house, by the way. Shout out to them. I can't just shut up about the cheesecake factory. It's great.

Only open one. They franchise what's- I don't think so. Toby. The cheese? Yeah. They handle it in-house at the cheese. Big money. Quality control.

Yeah, they're not making everything in-house in-house in-franchising, letting some fucking bozo take charge. That's an operation. They probably take part. Cucumber cheesecake. Cramer. Gold PB&Js. And I would literally, I remember one time

I was working at this place, and the owner, the food was so good. And after a couple of months, I put on serious weight. Sure. And he came in one day. He's like, your fatty is doing the guy. He's like, listen, slow it down. I, you know, it's family. I'm going to handful of meatballs.

What? How dare you? You're eating it like an apple. What do you mean? State and federal laws. It was a dying day. I would just eat all the time. But actually, to be honest with you, a lot of the times it was what we call in the industry,

scarfing. It was leftover from the table. I got real bad with that for a while. I would literally, most of my time spent on the floor was just going around clocking. Is she finishing that? Did they cut the burger in half? Is it a good looking girl, good looking dude? That's Hank. We call him the vacuum. That's Hank the Hoover. So bad for you. Literally just in the middle of a shift

taking like a half of like a gastropub hamburger like a thick joint and just swishing it down my mouth. You walk up to the thrill just just because it was that one even hungry. You walk up to the table taking sip of their diet coke. No, like Pulp Fiction. Yeah. So it was usually mostly that was waste anyway. When you really think about it, I was recycling, you know? And we're back in the spin zone. Jesus Christ. I'm doing you a favor.

Yeah. Oh, God. Oh, yeah. But all that's neither here nor there, folks. We got a gosh darn family episode on our channel. Family episode. Just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. Just the way we like it.

Yeah. When you join the Patreon, we will answer your garbage question on the air. We get a lot of submissions, but Patreon gets the first crack at it because they're the homies Get over there sign up. We're telling that selling you up. That's a good time Listen the homies in the good squad over the good community the homies speak for themselves There's well over 13,000 homies. So check it out. They the men lie fully lies numbers don't lie You know what I mean? It's a good freaking time It's from Cocktail.

We'll keep their mouth shut. Can't tell anybody. Dead wings, tell no tales. This one's just funny. This is from Scoppy. Are you garbage if you ride roller coasters on YouTube? What? Just watch your roller coaster.

Yeah, because I'm assuming it's just a guy with a camera in the front row and you're just riding the roller coaster dude. That's alright. I gotta give you that. Yeah, I like it. I've ever seen the video of the hamster in the stationary hamster wheel. They put a laptop with the roller coaster video in front of it and it like sees it and just starts taking it off.

It just freaks out. Really? It blows its mind. That would be a cool thing for the VR, for the Oculus. It's a big part of it. Is it really? Yeah, full 360 ride of roller coaster type joints. I would get freaked. I would feel that little, that little, the butterflies in my stomach.

I would feel that, because I feel that even when I watched it, if I watched it on, you know, like a travel show or YouTube or something like that. Scares the hell out of me. Well, now the NBA has a VR camera at all the games. So you sit and it's like you're sitting courtside. Really? Watching. Wow.

That is smart thinking right there. It's pretty sweet. Yeah, that's not bad. UFC's doing it. Everybody's getting in the game. You got punched in the head. We're all just- Get an arm bar.

You're on your couch getting this shit kicked out of you. Take off the glass. You got a bloody known black eye. Cut me. I tapped an hour ago. Give it up. I'm outmatched. That's awesome.

At VR, I tell you, every day I get closer and closer. You guys just might not see me. I just might be jacked into the wall. You're just in a virtual restaurant eating other people's food. HDMI cable right in my neck. Oh, man. Great question, man.

Yeah, let's see. This one's from Michael, $10 homie, ReadingPA. How you doing? There you go. Are you garbage if you destroy large objects and throw them away over a period of time to avoid calling a junk company to come take them.

I'm on week four of throwing away pieces of an old 80 inch TV. This guy's playing the Shawshank route. Hahaha. Shaking it out in the yard. Geez, dude. I mean, okay, yeah, I respect it. It would have took a natural disaster

for my mother to ever pay extra for the trash to call the junk guy. Oh, no. Well, yeah, we were also, I've said this before, we were a big dumpster fan. We had dumpsters or access to dumpsters at my dad's office or one of the job sites or whatever. So all of our home trash or boxes or couches were getting thrown in a dumpster somewhere.

And it's well-documented in this program that anytime anybody had anything done and it was a dumpster in somebody's driveway, that got used to the brim. Yeah. You got the dumpster, throw it up, bring it over and throw it out. Well, that's the best part about living in a city.

You just put it on the sidewalk and the city eats it. I know. That's another thing about New York. They were like, we're trying to cut down on the rap problems. Everybody's got to use trash cans. And I'm like, well, why the fuck haven't we been using trash cans for 20 years? You just threw your trash in the street with no, that's crazy. I thought you meant the dump, the, are they called dumpsters?

What are the things that they drop off in the thing when you're doing construction? A dumpster. They're dumpsters? Yeah. The trailers. They're called dumpsters? I don't know what you're talking about, but I think it's a dumpster. The big square ones that look like the end of a tractor

trailer. Are they closed? No, no, no. They're in front of a construction site. Not a dumpster behind like a Denny's, but like, it's another word for it. It's not a. Like a C box?

Yeah, but not a C box. There's another word for it. Are you using it for storage or throwing stuff out? For throwing stuff out. Like when the dumpster is in front of the construction site, you just a C box. There's another word for it. Are you using it for storage or throwing stuff out throwing stuff out like when the dumpsters in front of the in front of the construction site You just throw it over man. All that's Yeah, is there a No, no time. It's a dumpster. Is it a dumpster? That's the term for it dumpster trailer or something like that. I I throw stuff in there all the time.

Just a little skyhook in there. Well, in New York, they put the nets over them so you can't, or they're like behind the wooden walls. Well, you know what, that's their play. That's until Steph Curry changed the game. I have a very, it's like a code of honor from... Construction? Yeah, it's like you don't, you don't jam another guy out because there were so many jobs that you show up

and there'd be like fucking, some guy's living room sets in there And I got a fucking pull concrete slab and throw it in there. I got nowhere to go Yeah, or like now you got to lift the shit up over the fucking his couch So then you're in there rearranging other people's trash and I spent hours and some of those things cleaning them out Oh, yeah, grab and cheat rock with your hands Excuse me the willies dude. I remember one time we had a move we had to move a bunch of fucking Excuse me the willies dude. I remember one time we had a move we had to move a bunch of fucking

Concrete blocks like you cut up a floor of like a whatever like a you know Be a supermarket and you pull the blocks so they were like I don't know 150 pounds you put one or two in a wheelbarrow until they were so heavy And you had we just had like a little two by four ramp. It wasn't like built It was just like a two by four. Yeah onto the fit man and you'd have to get a death sentence dude you'd have to get a running start and dude hope your evil can evil on this fucking balance beam and so many times i would slip dude i'd go over fucking flip into the dumpster man like a bozo brutal uh all right this one's from cleat is van dam Is it garbage if instead of smoking heaters outside you paint your walls light yellow so you can't see the smoke stains? Hey, if you're choosing to live in it, I respect it. That's that's more chest not checkers to me You know what I mean? Yeah, if you're gonna live in it anyway, you might as well look better.

Heaters inside comes with flat soda in the fridge Yeah It does. It seeps into every aspect of your lifestyle. And a remote that kind of works sometimes. You got to bang it. You got to take a rubber band or Scotch tape on it for sure. You got to take the batteries out and put them back in. That dude's illegally streaming football games.

For sure. Yeah. I got the chip or whatever. He's got some sort of. I got the chip. The fire stick was big back in the day. or whatever you know, he's got some sort of. I got the chip. The fire stick was big back in the day. I think it's still pretty is, right? Which I don't understand what that is.

I think you can just get like a jailbroken full fire stick and just plug it into the side of your TV and you have everything. They didn't think of that? It's like a hundred bucks. My buddy, not my buddy, this kid I know was selling them on Instagram. He would just post on his story like,

yo, and he'd show them, he'd be like, yo, I got 10 left. they're a hundred bucks DM me. And then he'd be like, they're all gone. And what do you get? Everything? Everything. Everything. What do you mean? Like no rent movies, no nothing? Netflix, boom, I know. Every streaming service, every channel,

probably a lot of pay per view or what? You know what I mean? This is an Amazon technology that has been jail broke. Co-opted by the pirates out there. And he had his hands on everything. I just thought it would sell in online books. Well, it's not a Bezos production. People are taking it and then illegally cracking it

to allow you to- Reprogramming it. No, I understand that. He's not doing it, but it is an Amazon product. Oh, they're still making a little money on there. But it's an Amazon fire stick. Correct. No kidding.

Yeah, but I also think a lot of times, I'm not specific with this one, but they don't develop those things. There's other smaller companies that develop it and they just go acquire that company and now that's their product. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude's killing it, buddy.

I mean, from the bit tour days, I mean, you owe those restaurants, I owe Hollywood $95 million. Sure, sure. Never. I started buying $95 million. Sure, sure. Never. I hope. I started buying pay per views recently, but for a long time I'd hit up Pat. Yo, hit me with the link for whatever fight it is.

You know what I mean? And then just go from there. I used to enjoy a nice boot leg on the street, come by the restaurant. I always get a good one. My brother would get boot legs and bring them home. And that was when like. It was back in the days before I was in the business. This is DVDs

I remember I think we had old school and like this is like you'd get a good one where they print the label on it It would have like the it have the cover but it'd be printed off like your home printer But it would be like old school or whatever. Yeah, if you saw Chinese writing on the in the movie You knew it was a good one. Sure. Yeah, that was also Yeah, I think we might have mentioned this before of like well that no this one's hot wired into the like they're they're not Capturing the video there on a camcorder. Yeah, they're pulling it from somewhere. They're getting some illegal download I've watched a few of those you get used to it. Oh, yeah, you sure sure. It's like it's like a live performance cry cry again All right, good. All right, we, the speaking of credit cards

and you know, whatever scammy things. Please. This is from Kippy Stolencar, shout out to the Kia Boys. Is it garbage? I've never heard of this one. And I would, T-Bone, you might have to do some research if it actually works, because it doesn't make sense that it would work.

Is it garbage to buy things on your credit card equal to your minimum payment and then return them the next day because the return shows up as a credit or a payment on the card See what I'm saying? So if you owed a hundred bucks, that's true That can't be true. I'm so mad at myself. I'm not even sure how to Okay, say, uh, I would just type in like minimum payment return credit card minimum payment buy item return Well first go to scumbag.com. It's just a picture of us.

Eight down. Eight down. Um, that's crazy to me if that actually works. I don't think that works. It might buy you a couple days because in the system it... It doesn't show us a payment. Credit card refunds don't count as payments towards your monthly bill. Ah.

But I'm saying it might buy you a couple days if it registers as like a $14 credit until it actually, it might buy you a couple days to get your head above water. Yeah. Interesting. I'd be curious to see if anybody else has heard of that and or has done that. That sounds like one of those things

that would have worked like six years ago. Sure. And I feel like if that was something that you could do, my mom would have done it back in the day because she was a professional plate spinner. Oh yeah. Like a pro. Patti out there at the halftime show. Dude. Like a globetrotter. This going here, that going there. Didn't sign this. Date on this. Had a big binder, a little like accordion file. That's pretty cool My mom's was in it my mom's was in a bright blue with the red Reebok shoebox That was that was this that was the set of keepers. That was the financial file

She would sit there on Sunday at the kitchen table just angry. I Remember I'm going bells. Yeah, I'm doing my bounce in my checkbook Don't so we'll stop because you ain't gonna be happy when you're done to it's you should see her checkbook It's crazy. It looks like Sanskrit. You wouldn't be able to tell what it is, but she got it down at a penny Uh-huh. You know what's going on? I could see Patty rocking one of those big checkbooks like they have it like The three one there's like three on them and I just have to do that for work You feel official how much is it? Oh, I would just be writing checks all day. I did them Love that nice fountain pen

I Do I remember so many times and I didn't realize it was I mean not a dirtbag move. She was you know it The hold it till Friday. So many times she'd give like, you know, if it was like a tutor or the lawn guy or fucking whatever, it will, you know, just hold it till next Monday. I got a- You ever write a post-dated check yourself as an adult?

No, I've said this a bunch. I just recently got a checkbook because somebody doesn't take checks that I have. There doesn't take like automatic payments., or doesn't take automatic payments, so I had to pay check. Yeah, me. And I just cut one check a month to them, and I don't even record it,

because it's my only check and they're all in sequential order. So it's like, it's also, you don't need to record it. And you can't balance, I would argue, it's very hard to balance your checkbook anymore. All damn near impossible. Cause things are moving so fast. If you have a debit card connected to it, it's fucking.

That's why I love Navy Federal. The second that you do it, it comes out of the available balance. So you know what's up. Yeah, that's most debit, I don't think all debit cards. Love that. Yeah, it's a debit card.

Talk about the real feel. You know what's going on. I wrote one post-dated check, personal check to another person. Partied all weekend and all of a sudden he's like, hey, by the way, hit me with that on Monday? Said it was cool.

I thought we were friends. 75 bucks, so you gotta hold it till Friday. Dick. Did he? Yeah. So the GM job cost you another 35 or something. I've been financially ruined. Kidding me, I've never recovered.

It's on the back of a pizza box. What's your name again? What's your last name? Hey, Grave Meat and you. Dick and Pepperoni stains on it. I did a positive roommates check because you gave me the cash to pay the rent. I got to the bank and I'm standing in line

and I look, open the check up. I looked out of the memo and it just says four anal. And I was like ha to say. If I was a bank town don't take this the wrong way. I probably wouldn't. I'd be triple checking your ID and stuff like that. If you rolled in check all you want cash screen. This your boys out outside looking in the window peeking skateboards on the on the on the plate glass window. I'd be looking at you hard. Oh skateboards on the on the on the on the plate glass window. I'd be looking at you hard.

Oh yeah. Remember, remember the old you had to know somebody to cash in at the thing? I would throw a fit. If I got to check from work, because I didn't have a bank account for a long time. If I had to check from my work, I'd look see what bank it was, go to that bank and check it.

Yeah, yeah. And sometimes they try to play hardball. Well, you don't have an account and we don't know you and stuff like that bank, check it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And sometimes they try to play hardball. Well, you don't have an account and we don't know you and stuff like that. Honey, listen, don't business here. No, I've had all the, obviously, I mean, all those, as a struggling comedian in New York City, you figure out, I mean, anybody struggling,

you figure out where you can cut the corners and your lanes and the people, I remember I had to cash city bank checks and I didn't have a city bank. My last guy had, I remember I had cash city bank checks and I didn't have a city bank. My last guy had, my last boss had city bank and I would have to go, I'd have to go like fucking 50 blocks to the one that would allow you to do it.

But they didn't know if it was Friday night and you had been broke all week, you were gonna figure it out. That check was getting cash. Well, I used to write my own check. So, and some obviously, most weeks I needed my check before Friday. And I would do it in my, under the guise of like,

hey, I go in Monday, and I did this guy's bookie, but I'd go in Monday and I'd have to write the checks. Like he'd be like, oh, these things need to be paid this week. So I would knock them all out on, say, Tuesday. And then Tuesday afternoon, I'm like, hey, I just did my check. Like, I just ran all the checks. It just works better if you just sign all the checks

you need one time in the week. I don't wanna be in your hair. You're saving him time. I don't wanna be going back to you. You're going to bother, yeah. So come Tuesday afternoon at 2 p.m., I gotta sign fucking check for it a week. I only work daydows.

Sure. You're just answering questions you aren't being asked. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I totally not stealing from you either, sir. You're like a little sweaty there, huh, Scooter? Had nothing to do with you hadn't eaten in three days. Oh, man. Dude, I remember my first day at that place.

I went to one of those like... First thing you do is write you something. Yeah. Buddy, I'm back. I'm out back. Hey, what do you want from me? Well, signing bonus for the kid, huh? It's illegal for you not to pay me for training.

I had. Oh, dude. People pulling that move. You don't pay us for training? What do you think? I've taken jobs just for the paid training, dude. That telemarketers scam, I needed a 250 a week every froth for two Fridays.

Got my five on D, I was good for the month. Damn, I learned how to drive this forklift. Yeah, you're fine. Buddy, I'm drunk right now. I'm out of here in four days, dude. Don't even give me a name tag or nothing. I ain't sticking around. Save yourself the time.

But the first day, it was my first day, and I had to do, I think like I went to like one of the, you know how there's like a bunch of famous rays, like raised beats are raised original, famous rays. I went to them all. I went to one on like around 54th or something. To cash a check?

No, no, no, to buy lunch my first day of this guy's job and my card got declined after they had already given me, after they had already given me the had already given hot slice right there They take it back had two hot sleazies and at that point probably a straight bang and cold coke They take it back on you. Yeah, really We're gonna need all that steam you inhaled to Hey, give me those smells back. Hey, no sniffing Fanny You're just shaking parmesan cheese into your

hand. Can I get a cup of ice, please? I'm leaving with some. You used to judge me pretty harshly. You never crossed over into this, into this realm, but I was a big check cashing guy for a long time. Yeah, I didn't need to be because I really put your nose up at me for that. Yeah, you were, I mean, you did it, wait, you did it, yeah. You ended up doing it too long. Middle of the night. And a lot of- The one on 23rd Street.

You were always, you would call me like I was your banker and I knew banking rules and regulations. He'd be like, is it okay if my mom signed to check over to me, I'm signing it over to my brother that I'm gonna send it over to Dylan and he's gonna it over to my brother that I'm gonna send it over to Dylan and he's gonna write my name on it that I'm gonna take it to Raymond's check cash. You know, I was like, what?

Who's the guy that's famous, Ray's you talk about? Yeah, I was like, what dude? What just fucking go cash the check or at the place the bank was written? You're like, I can't, it was a bank of Omaha or whatever. Does anybody go in and open up a checking account anymore? Do you have to go into the banks still to do that? Yeah, I think so you got to get a no kidding

There's a lot of people who just do online check like it's just feel like a rich guy It's an online bank. I did that once I think it was TD Bank And I'm there I felt like I was a millionaire like I was like I was purchasing diamond mine You sit at that that customer service desk not a nice a on. You feel I'm like, I got my legs crossed. I'm looking at them like, I'm actually like I'm closing buying Bitcoin, but I'm like on Instagram or whatever. And I'm like, what was that sir?

Yeah, let me know what I need to sign, please. Yeah, they do a real nice over there. Yeah. So you sign a couple of documents. You're the type of dude. I could see your family having like a fake notary stamp. Like someone in your family was a notary and they died, but you still got the stamp so you're certifying

your own fucking... God, catch me if you can. We always had a notary, my stepmom was a notary for the longest time, so that was great. Your stepmom was a notary? Yeah, cause she worked for the... Did you go to school for that? No, no, you take like a class and like you just have to...

That's like being a judge or something. No. You're official. She got a gun? You're sanctioned by the like you just have to be a judge or something. No, you're official You're a sanctioned by the state. Yeah, she got a gun. No, what? I'm a US Marshal She's not bringing in collars, dude. She's She's notarizing like permission slips and waivers for skate parks. Yeah, I always scared me. You gotta get it notarized I was great. I'd go down yo I'm named Audrey yo odd. Can you notarize this?

What were you getting no, do I were you doing just like whatever permission slips or fucking you know mission slips? I didn't get notarized. I don't know what stuff I ever had to get notarized I had an in-house notary that she I don't know if it was legal She would sign it and notarize it because you could sign it as my she was my legal guardian Maybe Kevin's cool Audrey What was I get notarized yeah, dude, what are you doing a handful of things I had to get notarized Are you buying property I wish no, I'm probably fucking I don't know what you get notarized. I It's only

Maybe a lease you know lease notarized. You got a notarized I don't know the only thing I've ever gotten notarized was a waiver for an indoor skate park in North Carolina Yeah, dude. Yeah, so it might have been skate parks. I probably had to get like your it had to be no rise sauce That makes sense Yeah, that makes sense. I'd be very cool if we went back to where you put your seal on it. You know, the envelope with the wax and they put the thing. Somebody, didn't someone give us those? No. I don't know, did they?

Somebody I know just got one. Or I think it's like, I saw it, it was like an Instagram thing. Like you can get them now. Like they're pretty cool. They're like a kit you can get for like, you know, $39.99. Your personal seal. Yeah, you stamp it. That's cool. That's real cool. It's like the Crusades and stuff like guarantee safe passage. They're like a kit you can get for like, you know, 39.99. Your personal seal. Yeah, you stamp it.

That's cool. That's real cool. It's like the Crusades and stuff like guarantee safe passage through Mesopotamia. Okay. Yikes. Rough country up there. In the world of finances is from Andreas.

First time, long time, boys. Is it garbage to be turned down for a Bucky's credit card? Asking for a friend Buddy, I love the fact that you rolled the dice buckies is a Fantastic financial institution, and I think once you get your life straight. They will approve you keep course fucking trying. Yeah Bucky's but that they can you pull up the let's see the perks of a bucky's card all the deer nuggets You want all the deer corn for free. You get the wettest brisket we have in the campaign.

You get first cut at brisket. I'm a card holder, please. That's worth it right there. Here's your free kawachi. I think if you hang, if you're in a place, oh, I did see they just put a Bucky's fucking, no, a Bucky's billboard on the New Jersey term plate says Bucky's 582 miles away. Oh, wow.

Which makes me think they're doing some market research and expanding. Wawa's doing the same thing. Wawa's everywhere now. Bucky's is probably going out. Whoa. That's interesting. Yeah, shout out to a good buck. Wawa could step it up like Bucky's.

They could get, they could have a little country store. They could do some merch. Sure. They could have a little wing. You're not wrong. Yeah. I'm right, yeah, buddy, I'm with you. Buckeys, man, they have, they expand.

They have straight things that aren't even like Buckeys branded. They're just like selling clothes in there. Yeah. That are pretty nice. I mean, it's gonna be the size of a fucking Kmart soon. Yeah, which I respect That's all right. The Bucky's credit cards decent boys. Yeah, I'm sure it is safe five for five percent at the pump or in the store Damn a five percent five percent really that's great. Yeah, what's the interest rate? Oh? 87 through the roof uh

Oh, 87 through the roof. 8% to 18%. That's not that bad. But that's just if you don't pay it off at the end of the month. Yeah. And 18%, I think some go up to like 20, like 8% like you see like Mastercard or whatever. It was like up to 26.7, APR or whatever. That one loan I took was like 20% or something.

Yeah, I mean, you are a beuzo. It's a Mastercard. It's a good deal to mine. OK. Back by Mastercard. And you know it's for dirtbags because in the second thing It's a master card. It's a good deal to mine. Okay. Back by MasterCard. And you know it's for dirtbags because in the second thing it talks about is minimum payments.

Minimum payments is as low as 2% of your balance. Parentheses, minimum $18. There you go. If your credit card bill is 18 bucks. That's a bunch of Mountain Dews right there. Talk about a code red. Damn, okay. That's all right of Mountain Dews right there. Talk about a Code Red. Damn, okay. That's all right.

Look into that. I respect that. I mean, if we were about to head down that way, too. Yeah. On the sort of roof door. Let's go. If there was more Bucky's up here, I mean, I don't think a lot. Nobody else is really up here has one.

What do you mean? Right? Like, I don't think you can get like, I guess, Sonoco. Sonoco has credit card. My mom has a Sonoco credit card. Yeah. What do you mean? Like, I don't think you can get like, I guess Sonoco. Sonoco has credit card. My mom has a Sonoco credit card. Yeah. What were gas cards? I remember a couple of rich kids I knew. Their parents gave them gas cards. I think they were credit cards just, I also, my dad's company, my dad had them for the computer. But you can get snacks in the store with it, I remember. I think anything at the store. Yeah. It was only, it was like a Sonoco credit card just for,

it was like a corporate fleet of like, hey, we have 30 drivers out there or whatever, like all the gas goes through. And they would entice you to be like, Sonoco is like, get our gas cards, we'll give you a 5% back. So you know what I mean? If you got that big of a fleet, it's making sense. I like that. Yeah, there are a bunch of them do them.

Shell, Sonoco, Sikko, Chevron, Exxon. But it's all, what are we doing? You're leaving money on a table over here. They're all a bunch of a bunch of them do them shell sonoko sicko chevron axon But it's all what we don't even money on a table over here, but it's all you're saying it's credit cards only for that store It's like you're opening up a tab. Yeah. Yeah. The Buckeys isn't though. I could use the Buckeys card anywhere Oh, oh, but I think I'll be a master card basically. It's the master of the cards It's like having a Delta Amax you think they want to have a point system because if you use Bucky's card somewhere else, not in the Bucky's, what incentive do you get to have the Bucky's card? You just get regular master. For every $10,000 you get, that's one free bag of beaver nuggets.

You talking about the little popcorn things? Indeed I am. Oh, they're like corn pops. I love those things. I love them. I can't get enough of them. I love them. I did. They're right now. I love them. Turn into a fucking hillbilly real quick. I gotta tell you, I love my corn nuggets. I always wanted what they would taste like in a bowl of milk. They're like popcorn, but they're almost

like it's the whole kernel or I don't know what the term would be. What scientific word is. I've seen it done. You've seen it done in milk. Yeah. I mean, it's not like that's not that crazy. Bucky sells both of them.

I'm sure someone's done it before. You know what I mean? Shout out Clint Walker, friend of the show. Really? He's done it? Oh yeah. Really? Indeed.

I respect that. Gentlemen, I'd have to meet this young man someday. I like it. I gotta be honest with you. I like the cut of his jib. My cereal days are very few and far between. And once a year, I'll be home at my mom's and whatever and I'll get after it, but it's like. It's funny you bring this up.

I can't do it. I love it more than anything. It's probably the one meal other than pizza I've eaten the most is bowls of cereal. I just, I mulch the box too quick. I feel like shit afterwards. I just can't, I can't live a life where I'm doing, I'm crushing bulls the cereal no more.

It's funny you mentioned that. If it was a little more healthy, I'd be all over it. I can't tell a lie. Yes you can. Have you seen the program? Sure. That was a lie. You are not the father. You are a liar.

I have been dipping my toe into the cereal game. You're going to blow back up. Under control a bowl at night. They're going to cut that toe off. Dude, you shouldn't be doing a bowl of cereal at night. Listen, I know. Dead morning time. If you want to do it, do it in the morning.

You'll work that off. Nah, like a nice bowl of cereal around 10 o'clock before I go to bed. Man, not that much, not that crazy. Here we go. You get the goal post, keep shut up. I'm admitting it, I'm telling you. Okay, hold on. You've never fully told the truth and everybody listening knows that. I killed that guy, but he had it coming.

He should have heard what he said about my wife. He did. Would give my corn pops. Because if it was that little of a bowl, you wouldn't do it. You'd go like, I don't need it. You know what I mean? It's a bowl of cereal.

At least. At least. No, and I'm saying it's a bowl. It's a bowl. Yeah. Like an old man have an ice cream at night. Why do you keep moving it? You're eating.

You're having a bowl of cereal. You're having a bowl of cereal. Right before you go to bed. Stop saying a little. Not every night. Maybe once a week, twice a week. I'm telling you. Scouts's honor. Give me a buck. Give me a buck. He's credit card. I swear on it right now I gotta get a notarized cold tree

It's um It's a nice sweet treat. I That's I love it. I just I can't be in control of it because I fucking mulch it I you know I do the shame and like the bloatedness of crushing a box of special cane. It's pretty easy. Oh, the easiest. Yeah, it's pretty.

I don't start enjoying it until the top of my roof starts, the roof of my mouth starts getting cut up. And I go, now we're in it. Ah, and I double back because you need the cold milk to soothe it. I love drinking the milk when there's a little bit of cereal in here and washing it down. I'm gonna brain it. Ah, and I double back, because you need the cold milk to soothe it. You know what I mean? I love drinking the milk when there's a little bit of cereal in there

and washing it down. Yeah, this is how it started. So back at Christmas, I don't know why, but somebody at the bird's office brought in boxes of rice crispy treats with green ones and red ones. I think so they can make rice crispy treats with green ones and red ones I think so they can make rice crispy treats for the holidays and that somehow ended up in the house

which is there one day, like the monolith just showed up. That got the head turning and then next thing you know, a few days later, I'm putting in order to deli the deli guy shows up with a thing of corn pops and then they mix it and match it that combo classic relapse story you're gonna be breaking into a you're gonna be breaking into a shop right after hours fucking get enough getting you're gonna shoot the clerk and get arrested simplicity my friends little bowl of cereal blow and dudes for bags off friend cereal No box straight bag nice bowl of cereal. Yeah, I'm not those days are behind me. I'm trying to be more on

I'm confessing this to you. I know but like you listen you gotta you like you you gotta respect me that we don't believe you anymore You have to respect that Tony the tiger walking Only I got you You gotta respect me that we don't believe you anymore. You have to respect that. What if Tony the Tiger walked in, right? It's good! Oh, yeah, gotcha. Psst, psst. I don't know this guy. He's on a forklift. He's got a pallet.

He's all strung out, too. Hey, baby, just give me a little bit. You have to respect the gentleman, the code of criminals that I shouldn't believe you, right? I don't know if I necessarily agree with that. Okay. Because I just wouldn't have said anything. Why would I myself that?

Again, honor amongst thieves. You should go, okay, yeah, we're both criminals and I don't believe you. What do you think I'm not saying here? I'm saying- Probably the frequency? And you're gonna go, I'm telling you the truth. And I go, okay, that's fine.

I'm just going probably the frequency and the amount. Well, all I can say- I would say you're moving the goal post on. That's all I'm saying. And I would also argue that even if it is a bowl of cereal, highly dubious. It's a default. Oh, yeah.

It's a salad bowl, probably. That there's some other accoutrement floating around in that. Maybe a little tablespoon of shuggies. Some naners. You got a couple naners in there Fanny. I like a nanner in my cereal. I'll tell you that. A set of milk, it's ice cream.

All I can say, I hope this shows a little growth. I completely understand where you guys are coming from. And yes, I've made my bed, I slept in it, and you guys have every right not to believe me. Yeah, that's fine. I don't know why you're making this political statement like you're gonna make me feel bad. I don't believe you about it.

Let's get some honey naturios and celebrate. No, I'm saying, love them honey naturios. You know what always bothered me when you go out to breakfast and someone gets a bowl of cereal out to breakfast. That like a diner or something? Like a little box. Even as a kid? Kick box. What the fuck are you? First of all, you never get the right ratio. You're making it at the table like a fucking jerk off. Yeah, it's what are you get that cereals at home?

You have you have the best version of cereal at home. You don't have the best version You don't have the best version of pancakes at home. You have the best version of pancakes at a diner. I would disagree with that But it's a case in point whatever like sure like your mom's pancakes for sure Whatever 99% of the time pancakes out are gonna be way better than you make them at home. And I agree with you. And easier, there's no mess, there's no clean up, you sit down, you get the eggies, you get that. However, back in the day when you walked into a diner or a luncheonette and you would see behind the counter, up top,

they were sitting on like the soda machine or something a lot of time. Yeah, it's saying caught your eye It looks good, but it's not that they come in those wax bags You're like get the forgive me like the fucking give why don't you just buy a big box of cereal make me a bowl So you're on a bag wasn't your generation Weren't you guys those little mini boxes of cereal the variety pack? Didn't they step that up a notch when you guys were kids where you could pour the milk right in there and eat it out of it?

I was just about to ask that. Is that what the wax bag is for? No, no, that was back in the day. It, they had it, it was like perforated so you could open it up and then you could crack the bag and then you just had a sack of milk and cereal. Oh, I don't like that. Canadian hobo.

Yeah, no, not my cup of tea. You dork's were doing the week I think we mentioned this no why are you dude that was like my young that was like fucking what am I gonna say the straw you bring this up like monthly like it was me and my boys that made it you son of a bitch first of all that came out when I was like 15 or whatever the purpose the I get I get John oh man people just people change all All right. Get with the times. This is how they're doing their milk.

I like a nice bowl of total. Yeah. Get out of here. Pop off, Jones. I do like a total. I get targeted ads for those like, uh, it's like the combo for cereal where it's a, it's like a to go cup, almost like a Stanley mug where, or a, or a Yeti where it has a cereal up top and then the milk in a separate container, so then you sip it, and it drops some cereal

in your mouth, and a little bit of milk, and that makes me wanna blow up the car of anyone who's using that. That's how that works, that's what that is? Yes. I don't know, I gotta get some eyes on that. No! That might be my to-go cereal. I might be back in the game, gang.

Bring that to the gym. I didn't know I could have Coco Puffs on the move. You're on the ellipticals sucking down fruity pebbles. Woo! That's when I think, come out. They pull me back in. You like a fruity pebble? No, it's never a fruity guy. Choco. Choco?

Pebbles. Choco. Cocoa puffs at my dad's. Cocoa pebbles at my mom's. That was it. Reese's puffs at my mom's, Applejack. That was a credit. Weed in my gumads. My dad got real, my step mom really introduced us to some cereals that we weren't really bang, that Denise wasn't banging with. Sure.

Denise always had Frosted Flakes, Cocoa Pebbles, Special K, Cheerios probably. In three of those four things at all times I got these things that I got to get these things Chocolate frosted flakes. I don't think I'd like that. Oh, let me tell you yeah Not my risk at all just visually. I don't like oh there's so in your lane Stay in your lane either your houses have the the big Tupperware Container of where they would put the cereal?

I didn't like that. I felt like- Oh, we got a sitcom? Yeah, I felt like the people, they put their hands in it as they dumped it. I want my stuff coming right out of the factory box. That's the people that put the orange juice in the container,

like would pour it in like a glass can. That was family ties. Yeah, that's commercial shit, I feel. My aunt and uncle used to do that shit they got bodies on yeah or mice because they they will get through a special k-box the nieces in the weeds with them prepers yeah they got some some cackalack is running through there can a mini weeds get out of here. Coyotes in the living room, dude. Oh, man. He has squirrels in here, lady. Sitting there eating in the dark and stuff.

Gobble, we got to wrap it up, gang. Gang, I'm going to tell you this right now. We tell you all the time, we love you. Love you! Come out and see a live show, rugarbage.com. Dot crime. Ha ha ha ha. Chocolate fave.

Only had one bowl of cereal. Dot crime. I got corn pops on the brain. Rugarbage.com, grab some tickets. We got the first leg of the tour up. Come out and see us. We love you to death, and we'll see you next week. Peace!