Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Picky Eaters w/ Trevor Wallace!

Episode Date: June 29, 2026

Are You Garbage podcast presents stand up comedian and podcast host Trevor Wallace! You know Trevor Wallace from Stand Up Comedy, the Stiff Socks Podcast, Kill Tony, This Past Weekend with Theo Von, Impaulsive Podcast, Your Mom's House, We Might Be Drunk, TigerBelly, Whiskey Ginger Podcast, Botez Sisters Podcast, Something's Burning with Bert Kreischer, You Made It Weird, and so much more! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! NEW AYG MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ AYG 2026 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: Shopify: Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/garbage Promo Code: Garbage Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gang, Tootie's got a limited Fourth of July drop coming at you. Mm-hmm. We got some nice t-shirts. Show up to the barbecue looking fresh, clean, and patriotic. Yeah, don't be a bozo. Available at RUGarbage.com while supplies last. Happy Fourth of July. Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast.

This is R.U. Garbage. It's that little show. We sit there with your favorite comedians, and we find that to be classy. Yeah. They're just a big old piece of trash. Trash, trash. I'm your host, Tates, Fully. I'm your host, Tach, Fully, coming at you on a beautiful day.

We're out back here at Tootty's in the new edition. She's down in the basement with the cable guy. Okay. So bad news is there's a funk down there, a little smell, but we got free HBO. There we go. All right. Take time. With commercials.

What you say? With commercials. The bad Hulu package. I did just buy the bad Hulu package. We just talked about it. My mom's got it. She's got no general hospital. She's freaking out over there.

But that's neither here nor there. Mike Coase is coming at you from right next to me. He is the same. CEO of Are You Garbage, international businessman, and I would assume not too happy with me right now. Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan, everybody. Shout out to you. Thanks to tuning in. As always, please make sure you rate view, subscribe on iTunes, full video available on YouTube.

Also, full video available over there on Spotify, and the boys are in the middle of the charts. We're climbing. Right where we want to be, not showing off, not falling behind. And obviously, the greatest website of all time, www. www. www. com. slash RU Garbage, you join you over 15,000 people over there.

How you done? Let's go. And, gang, we could be more excited to ever, incredibly. and I mean incredibly special guests, back with us again today. Good friend of the show. Yes. You look up killing it in the dictionary.

You'll see a picture of this kid with his perfect hair. He's currently on the alphabet of mail tour. Give it up for Trevor Wallace, everybody. Thanks for having. Kev Foley. Good to see you guys. Hey, pal. Good to see you.

I want to pass along. We had Rory Scovel here not that long ago. You were with him the day before he was coming here. He was trashy. No, no, no. Good, good, good. And you had very kind words about the show. He was talking to Trevor about it yesterday.

He said, you're going to love the show. It's so much fun. Those guys are great, which is always nice to hear. Oh, yeah, dude. We love you, buddy. Big ups to the show. I've always loved this. And people who have asked me about it, I go, dude, it's so fun.

It's literally a writing session. Sure. Because there's so many bits that come out of it where you, like, unlock so many memories. Never thought about, yeah. It's great. That's what he said. He said, you said, yeah. Thanks for you saying it in a worst way.

That's what he said. That's what he said. All right, let's get Roy back on. I feel like I'm on drugs right now. You sound like that. Something in the air, something in the air. I wanted to ask you both this question. No.

That's all the time we have for today. Is it about Cuomo? What are we talking? All right, so I forgot to bring this up to you. But maybe like a few weeks ago, I was down at home in Bluebell. I was at the Whitpane Tavern, if you want to know. Big Cous. Oh, shit.

They let you in? How'd you get a table there? Open table Got him on Resi Great spot Great, great local Local spot I'm with my cousin Paul

And he's like Let's get Where's getting worried with Paul Paul's there You got no Paul I'm with generic guy Paul Front of the show Friend of the show Paul

Okay You got a bar with your With your bozo cousin Yeah that's right Okay Wants to order wings All right Whoa

Who wrote this Homer Simpson I told my agents I didn't want to do a woke podcast. Can we tone it back a little bit? He wants to order wings. And he goes, I'm going to order all drumsticks. Is that okay? And I'm like, what?

And I'm like, I'm going to want some drumsticks too. And he's like, then we have to get two orders all drumsticks. That's a lot of drumsticks. Is that normal? Wait, hold on. He doesn't like the flats. I love flats. But that's my favorite.

But either way, whether it was the flats or not. do you have that power to ask to just get one or the other? That's what's the trashiest thing I've heard in my life. I would say this is my take and then you seem like you have a good thoughts on it. I would say 20 years ago, that'd be a wild ask. I think you're allowed to now and I don't know why. I don't know why. That's not how wings work.

So because he was ordering for himself, not for the table, right? It was for us. We're going to share it at the bar. It's not who's a for. It doesn't matter who's a for. It doesn't matter if I don't know to wings or not. And Paul didn't get any. It's, it's, could you sit there and say to a server or a bartender?

We want to order some wings, but I don't want any flats or I don't want any drumsticks. I just want all one thing. What's the kid doing the friar going to think? He's got to pull them out one by one. Yeah. You got to hope someone wants all flats. Exactly. And you're left over with all flats after that.

Well, usually they, I mean, on some of the apps, you can like pay an up charge for just drumstick or just flat. You can? Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm behind the time. Big Buffalo Wildlings. I think you can do that. Big chicken wing is getting after it.

Shout up to the boys of Tyson. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The big chicken wing propaganda. But sometimes, that's an app thing. Asking the server, server waitress, I don't know. Is that weird or not? You got to go back. Okay, as a certain, you got to go back and you got to say to the fry guy,

who's probably not having a great day. And probably not too pumped about what he's doing. You know, if the waiter wait or waitress said, do you want all drums are all flats? Then you have an option. but to just delegate tasks, now I'm getting it. It seems wild to me. It seems wild. And how many was it?

Was it like a 10-piece order per person or what do we talking? It would have been 20 wings. Okay, that's a lot of counting it. It's a lot to assume that a fry cooking count up to 20. This guy's got good points. Oh, that's a day. Very true. I only got 10 hands.

What do you want me to do? Count of my toes. How much of it? I mean, you're an LA guy. You know what I mean? You do well? I love what you. I love your interpretation of it.

You literally think he's the coolest guy in the world. Which is a very cool guy. I think he's the coolest guy ever, and I think he's a billionaire. Yes. Flew on a rocket ship to get here. I was going to ask, are you a special request guy at the restaurant? No. No.

I take what I, like, if I say no cilantro and there's cilantro, I go, this is, this is it. These are how my cards are dealt. I got to play that. What would have to? What would have to happen for you to send it back? Or not send it back, but go like, you know, anything? It would have to be wild. Yeah, I don't know if I've ever said anything back

I'm sure I have, but I just, my thought is I never want to delay the group. Because, you know, they send my shit back. Now everybody's waiting. Now I want a 20 minute delay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I kind of just, but here's the bitch thing. I'll do all out loud say that I don't like it.

And hope other people are like, well, do you want some of mine? I like that move. Passing the president. The table, you put it on the table. Well, well, if somebody asks, again, we're back to that. Oh, hey, Trevor, how's your burger? Ah, salmon's little drys. I don't know.

This isn't really what I thought of. And then would you, well, you even go like, that was great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You want some of mine? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, salmon's a little dry. I knew I should have got what you got. Well, do you want?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's subtle. It's a great way to ask for. That's great. I knew I should have what you got what you got. Well, do you want to bite? No, you can. Then next thing you know, the scraping it on a little tea plate for you.

See, I picture you do with the Grove with other influencers, ordering off the menu or something like that. No, I don't, um, I don't know if. He doesn't even know what anything he just said. That was a big, that was for a New York guy. You were hitting the gym. I saw it.

It was in Get Shorty. Yeah, okay. They need to Vito goes and orders that omelet. That's what I assume all you guys are doing out there. A little bit. There's definitely about those dinners. But when people just are ordering a muck, you know, then you can just kind of pick and choose. Like, a little bit of that little bit of this.

Yeah. Now, I got some. Say, you know, we might have crossed paths at this at some point. If there's, this is a different time, too. Say you're out with your friend and everybody's order and stuff. How's that getting chop? You're jumping on that grenade at all? Bill-wise?

Yeah. Someone else jumping on it. Is it, what are the, what are the vibes? You know, it depends if I'm drinking or not. Yeah. If I'm two cocktails deep, get the platinum card out. Ding, ding, ding. I'm trying to.

We're talking business. Because then it's almost like, no, I got it, I got it, I got it. But if it's, it really just depends. On the company. Yes. Yeah, because usually, because I'll split or I'll just try to offer my whatever, but sometimes someone's just like, I got it. I insist, I insist.

I'm also a big, he's. I think it gets, with money. No, I think it gets to a point. I'm the same way. I'm happy to pay for it. But like if someone else goes, I got it,

I got, you sure let me get into a thing. I give you a one or two. One or two, but then it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

give me that check. I said give me the check. It's like, you're making, I feel like you're making it weird sometimes to be like, all right, I'll get you on the next, like. Most about convenience too. A hundred percent.

If it's like, there's six of us. Somebody's like, well, we can all split a six way. Now you're giving a waitress six credit cards. No, no, no, no, no, yeah. It just feels like a lot to divvy up. It's like, I'd rather just do this and then, hey, this is my good karma for the week. And nine and a ten times, you're the one that she's going to remember.

Trevor, you know, Trevor, he's for all flats. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But to go back on that, I, now, how many, I mean, we travel as a crew, there's six of us when we go out on the road and stuff like that, and they'll every single time, or 90% of times ago, how many checks They look like losers Like they ask for that automatically

Yeah Which I think now is just more So I do think asking for all drumsticks or flats You're now it's now more curated To the diner rather than Get what we have type That's all I'm trying to say Some places are real sticklers with it

On the bottom of Cere'll say like two cards max Which I love that I like that What are you doing? I like it fucking listen You go out as a group Settle it as the group Don't bring the waitress in

Yeah yeah What do your thoughts on no substitutions You get a place think We don't do substitutions at the bottom of the menu. And like, fuck you, I'm paying you.

I'm saving you money. I don't want tomato. Take it off. That should be a modification, not a substitution. I'll give you that. Flag on the plate, revoked.

But if it's a nice joint and it's like a, it's like a chef, let him do his thing. Okay. Listen, I think if you go, hey, if you go, hey, I, you know,

hey, instead of the side salad, can I do the lobster bisque? I think that's a big upswing, you know what I mean? Right, right, right. I think if you want, hey, can I do the burger with no tomatoes? That, for sure. Just makes me hate the kitchen immediately.

I got you. Yeah, so you fucking tell me what I can do? I just sat down. Yeah, I just sat down. This is what it is. Uh-huh, no. We can't give a little, take a little. Buddy, you're preaching to quiet because I like, I like a lot of making a lot of modifications.

Yeah, and they're subtle. There's nothing crazy. It's just like, hey, no Rugal on a burger that doesn't belong here. It belongs on the side. Yes. Yeah, and I'll go to, too. I'll go to, hey. No tomato, no, whatever.

But that's just taking something off. That should be okay. Right. But sometimes before you even start, hey, do you guys mind it? They cut it off right before you even get to that. Hey, do you guys mind? Boom. Sometimes those places, those servers, they have the attitude of the chef.

It's like, you're not while on me. Well, they know that they got to deal with the chef right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course, they got to deal with the chef, true. But sometimes those guys, we had that somewhere where they hated us. Most places we go. No, the guy, they don't like you. They don't like him.

Really? And as a waiter, where did dickhead? You think. You think they did. I'm your guy. Also, he was a waiter for a lawyer. He was a career waiter until this show took off. They're referring to an incident at Marvin in Los Angeles.

That's what they're referring to, I believe. Yeah. Yeah. So as a previous waiter, do you know lingo to kind of like get your like your stripes in? Because I got a buddy, I got a in and out. I got a buddy that used to work there. And we'd go there. Front of what a cool crew.

Cool crew. But he would wait until after ordering, then he'd be like, so what level are you? And the guy would be like, yo, you used to work. And then he would feel like, you know, it's like now it's not customer customer. It's like, whoa, oh, we're chill like that. There's like a connection. A bond. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So would you drop anything or are you the guy that's like cleaning up plates for the waiter wait or waitresses? You mean like trying to talk jive to a black guy or something like that? Like I would know that. Like I got the end. Let me handle this. I got. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. When you go to Reebok and you say, hey, you play two. Right. I'm saying, like, is there anything you're saying when ordering, like, hey, I know it's probably a small kitchen. You're probably 86 this already. So give me a favor. Before you fire the entrees, can we start out with the amuse bouch?

Yeah. And make sure that you meze and blast everything. Yeah, but are you saying any buzzwords to let him know, like, hey. He tries. I was once on your side of the team. Oh, really? And from outside in, you can defend yourself. Outside in, he goes heavy too quick of like, you don't want to put him out at all.

You don't want them doing extra work. So you go, oh, you don't need to. And it's like. And they hate me for that. He throws a lot of stuff at them as they're like trying to, they'll be like, oh, hey, here's your water. I don't grab. I got, we're okay. I'm water.

Hey, we got the forks. We got the night. You can take you. The guy's like, I was just going to ask if you needed refill. It's like, it's a lot. And then they get weird about it. I did it one time with a bottle of wine. Okay.

The guy came over to port. And I was like, no, it's okay. I'll do it. And he was like, the fuck? Yeah. I work here, dick. You put your own napkin on? He's just.

I sit him down. I'm crum in the table. You taste it. No, I can tell you as a server. I used to fucking hate that when somebody would be like, well, I've worked in the business. Right, right, right. Well, you're not working here now. You dumb fucking bitch.

I said no tomato. You get fired for a reason, okay? Hand over the breadsticks. Okay. Sorry. I was going to say, I want to check in with the kids. See what's going on. On a similar thing.

of recent debate, which I caught a lot of, a lot of flack for. I saw, strap in, we are getting controversial. I said, and maybe this came off wrong,

and I defended it with an occupation. I said there should be an age limit to when a respectable adult should be eating Doritos. Respectable, not to say I don't like them and I don't love them. Okay. But, right.

I got to hear what age you taught people out. Hold on before you ask that, I need to know what kind of guy I'm dealing with. Right now, as you sit here, how do you feel about the Cool Ranch Dorito? I had him two days ago. Okay, good. Yeah, I don't need anything. This guy's a comedian. He's in.

That's okay. You know where I'll get on board with that is a Doritos Locos Taco from Taco Bell. You must be 14 or younger to get that. That's a lot going on. That's a lot going on. You can't have a whole family and have Dorito crust on all five fingers being like, well, I don't know. Do you want to go to SeaWorld or not? And then you're hitting, that's got an age with it.

That's a messy hug. Yeah. The one bag, you can kind of, that's a two-finger cleanup. But when you're doing the whole, the whole talkup, that's fourth, eighth grade and below. You can't be signing people's report cards. Right, right, right. Well, there's my thing. Would you look at it differently?

Say you were, you know, you got arrested and you went to meet with your lawyer. And he's sitting there with a bag of a fucking spicy nacho. And he's like, don't worry. I got you covered. You're going to go, I don't fucking know about this. It's a privacy thing. You can only eat them at home or at an airport. Other than that.

Okay. The airport is very good. But you would lose credit. There's no rules at an airport. None. Well, there are. If you're a pilot, I don't want you eating it. No.

Right. No. If I got on a guy was dumping up like the crumbs, the crumbs of Cool Ranch Doritos in his mouth, I'd get the fuck off the plate. Kind of wondering what's an okay thing for your lawyer to eat. Something from a place with no substitution. A ham and cheese sandwich with no lettuce and tomato.

Yeah. That is wife packed. Yeah, there you go. Or at like a fucking five-star joint where the server knows him. He walks over, he hands him the $100 bill, and everything's taking care of. I want to see some azhou on his table when he's signing paper. Yes, yes, yes. So what age do you see me in fucking nerds rope while we're talking about, you know?

Right. I'm going to trial for murder here. Yeah, I'm going to hang myself with that nerds rope. I would say into your 30s it gets questionable based upon, you know, I mean, I love them. They're delicious. It is a more of a immature, immature snack. There's got to be football on somewhere. Something, yeah.

A road trip on the horizon. That's very good. Camping. I mean, first of all, I completely push back on this. I love them. Doritos can be enjoyed by anybody of any age or weight. Okay, you're taking this as a personal attack. That's what I think.

Yeah, I don't know. I just, that was my, I don't know, man. And it's just like not, I don't know anybody very respectable doing it as a guy who eats them a lot myself. I think maybe the size of the bag sometimes plays in. If you're eating, if you're 45 and you're eating a little lunch bag, that's kind of a, you know, I'm talking about. That's a tough look. You got a bag of teddy graham somewhere. It's a big chip too.

So you really got to widen up for, you know, you're on a phone call. You've got to hit mute and then you're, you got to. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It is. But, you know, I'll go a bag of chitos. every once while. That's crazy to me. Really?

I mean, I like the Cheetos. I'm just saying... Cheetos is a sneak hitter. Dude, they are. Loved him as a kid. Loved hot Cheetos as a kid. Didn't eat him for like a decade. Then had some of the sandwich recently.

It was like, so good. So, maybe the best thing has ever been invented. This Chester guy's on to something. He is. You know what turned me back on to Cheetos? When I saw W with Josh Brolin, when he played George W. Bush, that's what he had. He had a Dr. Pepper, a sandwich, and he had Cheetos.

The president's eating Cheetos. That was a takeaway from the movie. That was a take away from the movie. That whole movie. All right. These are presidential. I got to try some of these things. We were talking about hot fries too very recently.

Which they didn't, I mean, they have to be enjoyed outside. I don't know what that is. You got to eat hot fries outside. I don't think you're wrong. I think if you touched them in trash. Interesting. I'm surprised. I mean, it's not classy.

No. Oh, I don't eat them. Let's be honest. They're whacked. Who had that guy was a creep? We had to fucking had one. You couldn't see his eyes. I know he was all.

all smoked up. I don't hate them. I don't, but we had a vending machine in a high school that sold them for a dollar and we'd be eating them at 8 in the morning. Yeah, I mean, Arizona iced tea and hot fries. I mean, $2 deep and you're just geeked in the first period. You're snoozing

dude. I mean, just a crazy diet. That's crazy. I did, it took me so long. I was so fat and was chugging the ice teas those Arizona iced teas every morning.

eating Dunkin' Donuts and one of those in my car every morning and not realizing why I was so fat. I'm like, it's my tea and a bagel. No, I was doing a breakfast sandwich sandwich with the little hash browns. Great. You like those hash browns at Dunk?

That's great. I just had some recently. They're so good. You know, it's another sleeper for you kids out there? The hash browns at Burger King in the morning are fire. I haven't been to a BK Lounge in a minute. A BK Lounge. Gets busy after 11.

I know the door. man. There is one kind of near where I live and they got a big flex. They got a, that char. A sign of a good neighborhood. Yeah, there you go. That char ain't bad.

You gotta go bad. But you don't really fuck me up mentally is when you realize all grill marks on chicken and fast food is like painted on. Yeah, it's fake. It's literally a henna tattoo and we're over here pretending like it's fresh off the grill. But Burgerkin's got a little char flavor to it.

And I'm like, is that like a spray? Is that real charred? They're running through. That's flame broil. You can smell that. That's flame broil. You smell that. I like.

Smelled out probably from your house. It's good. It's got a nice linger in there. We were talking about this with Tim Dillon. We have to bring Burger King back for the country to heal. Yeah, what was their last big hit? Chicken fries? That was you guys.

But they were also watching Hay Arnold. They changed them again. When they first hit as like an exclusive menu item, limited time only, well, they took them away and then they brought them back. It wasn't the same. They were crispy. It was like a mozzarella. It was good.

They've fallen off. Kepp, what's talking about Shopify? Shopify. Now, we've talked about Shopify a lot here over at All You Garbage. We're obviously a Shopify family. Cheching! 100%. Shopify has made our business easier.

Yes. And if you're starting a new business, which is incredibly hard, don't think. You have a lot of things going on. Not to mention just the courage to do it. Is it going to work out? Is it going to be this? Is it going to be that? Am I going to surround myself with the right tools to build the business?

Well, here's an easy fix for you. Shopify is the right. tool to help build your business. Yeah, Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S. of A from household names like Are You Garbage? The brand's just getting started out. Get started with your own design studio with hundreds of ready-to-use templates. Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. If you ever purchased anything from RU Garbage, it's been through a Shopify website. I didn't even know what Shopify was. I started talking to the web guy. He just,

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Checking account ranking based on a JD Power survey published October 20, 2025. For more information on APY rates, my pay, spot me and travel perks, go to chime. I want to know. Are you still in the same spot? What's going on? Where was that last time we talked? House? No, I forget to be honest.

Yeah, yeah. I think so. Have you moved recently? You talked to us. No, haven't moved, haven't moved. Did you buy anything? I got a real dirtbag move. You guys might like.

Hit me, please. Got rid of the Tesla, right? Had a model three, you know. Okay. And I go, okay, you know, it just wasn't, whatever. Lease was coming up to an end. I go, I want something and I want something nice. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Go ahead. Now, I was just going to say, can we guess a little bit? Yeah. Let's think of it. I'm going to write it down because I think I know where Kevin says that. I don't even, you guys will love this.

Hmm. This is the dirtiest of dirt. Go ahead. Okay. Is it a luxury. It's a luxury car. It's a luxury model. Would it be in the SUV category?

It's not. Whoa. I was going to say G-wagon. Me too. No, I can't do that. G-wagon. I'm bombing at the laugh at you and hopping into G-wagon. All the TV screens are playing in the head, red.

God, yeah. I just tried to high-five you, by the way. Oh, sorry. We got to edit that in. Get the high-fiving. Huh. Okay. Cadillac.

Mm-mm. No. Ferrari. No. No. No. No. I did.

Could you, though, if you wanted to? A Ferrari? Yeah. Uh, yeah. I mean, I don't be, are people, can you lease? But I wouldn't be, uh, comfortable, money wise. But yeah, I would be stressing, but could. Very good.

I'll give you a clue. I stayed in the, uh, the EV realm, the electric. Oh, Rivian. Rivian. Rivian. Rivian, no. Those are nice, though. Cybertruck?

No, God no. God no. God no. One of those new Broncos? No. A ruggler. A Prius? No, no, no, no, no.

Oh. Razor scooter. Lime. Lime, Lime scooter. I got to charge it up. I got a hopped-up city bike. Huh. I don't know. Are we going to know this?

It's a German car. BMW. No, no, no. Mercedes. No. Well, that's all a German car. Volkswagen? I hope they're German.

Maybe. Ford. What is it? Porsche. What? What? That's Italian. Is it?

I don't know. Is it German? Porsche. Really? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Because when I say it was German,

the split second after I was like, is it? I do. I do that stuff. All the time. You're like, wait. Oh, yeah. So I got a Thai can, which is the electric one. Tycan?

That's a whack-ass name. A taikin? Wait, how do you spell that? NYCAN. Oh, like the guy. Tycon. Tycon. It's one of those dual tomato tomato.

Cross Torreismo or TurboS? Just standard. Okay. The sexy car. But this is where it gets very... Very nice. This is where it gets very RU Garbagey. Okay.

It's used and I got a lease on it. Because here's the life hack. These electric vehicles, once they're used, their resale is shit. Because everybody goes, well, I don't want to buy this thing because in two years, the range is going to be better. Sure. Like an iPhone. Yeah, because it's still so new in the process that they're only going to get better. So this car already was cheapest shit because it was used.

And then on top of that, they go, well, you can lease it. And then on top of that, the guy working there ended up being. and like a homing like a fan. So, I mean, I'm paying like Tesla prices for this car. And, yeah, but I got to plug, Tri-County Porsche. Shut out Gary. Shout out Woodland Hills Porsche. But, yeah, so it was like $115,000 car.

But new, right? Brand new. Yeah. But the resale, I think, cut to like 60 or something. Yeah, I'm looking at one now. The 66. The life has, you know, and if you can't, I don't think they ever really do leases on-use cars, which was mind-blowing to me.

That's how shitty the E-B market is. We just want this off the law. Yeah, you got to move product. It may or may not have been in the fires. Yeah. Yes, exactly. So. No shit.

So I'm paying. You get a Porsche for 60 grand. That's like what a fucking Jeep. What a Jeep goes for. Yeah, but I'm, yeah, exactly. So I'm leased. It's like a two-year lease. So I'm literally, I'll probably end up going back to some more practical like a Tesla or whatever.

Is it feel cool? It feels great. It feels great. It feels like it's like some crazy expensive car. So I pull into a little. the comedy store and all the door guys there, all the other column was like, Jesus Christ man, how much money you make it on the road? I'm like, it's used, it's used.

It's a lease. I'm not paying, I'm only paying $100 more than it was for my Tesla 3. Yeah, you got to, you got the fucking bill to sell out. You almost feel bad. No, I get that. Because you're like, you're like, crumpled 20s at him. I get out of it. I get that. Because I did that, I bought a, I had a Kia and then it got stolen, the Kia boys got me. And the first new car ever owned, they fucking got me. Is it really that easy to hot wire? It's crazy.

You can hover with like a USB or something, right? You know, mine just is a screwdriver. The certain ones would just, yeah, it's a USB or they pop the ignition out with a screwdriver and then literally just the screwdriver just turn. It's like turning to the slide. I swear to God. It's that easy? I had to start it to get it from after I, but we found it.

I had to start it myself with a pair of pliers. Literally takes a second. Wild. Jesus. But I then got a used, not certified pre-owned. I got a, I went to Carvana where like you don't get to see it. You just roll the dice with it. Yeah.

and they drop it off. It's a real tacky. They drop it off. You doory dash the car. Dude, they drop it off at a huge Carvana fucking truck. Yeah. And like their sirens and they're, it's like, dude, they drop it off in front. Bottle service.

I know. Sparkers are going on. They dropped it off in front of my building. It was very, very embarrassing. What did you get, though? I got a used Mercedes GLB. to the lowest SUV you can get. What mixer's package did you get?

Cranberry juice, grapefruit juice. I did suit it. I'm a big used car guy. Well, this is, this was my thought. So it's like, I, dude, it was, I think, because he got a new Jeep around the same time. And it was like the same price. It's the same payment. I got it like, it's like two or two and a half maybe years old.

Someone leased it for two years or something. And I took it. It's like, I'm only going to fuck it up. Yeah. I've never had a nice car. This is, I'm cool with this. Yeah. I almost didn't like leasing a new car because it's just, it's too new.

It's like new shoes. You're like, I can maybe wear these today? It didn't feel comfortable. I didn't, I don't need something that nice. No, not at all, especially parking in Los Angeles and driving around the city. And I just, I didn't know you could get leased a used car. So the payments. I've never heard that.

Yeah. I think they're really trying to get them off the lot. Because I went to an auto dealership to look at some of their electronic cars. I was like, can I lease this use all? What are you talking about, kid? And I was like, oh, this portion is trying to get rid of them. They're like, because the resells is just such shit. I mean, it's usually like half the price of like what all these EVs about half.

It's like there was a portion I was looking at. And it was literally a quarter of a million dollars. And I go, what is this going for now? He's like, it's like 100K. I'm like, you know, like that's such a good deal. But like that should be a huge red flag that it's half the price. Wait, that car was. No, separate one.

Another one. There was one I looked at and it was like. 250 grand. It was fully decked out. It was like the turbo S or whatever. And every package possible. It was a like a rocket. It was unreal.

And then it ended up selling, but it was $2.15, and I think it was going for $1.12. Now, let me ask you this. Shoot us straight. You go in there, guys like, this is $2.50. Do you go, what the fuck? Or do you go, okay. No, only you're not doing. I do the same thing I do at a mall.

I look at it go, oh, all right, yeah. Let me talk to my girlfriend. Let me run it past the lady. Uh-huh. You always, are you blaming on somebody else? Is that your move? Let me talk to my girlfriend, see what she wants to do. I like that.

I divert to anybody and everybody. Okay, yeah, well, I get another appointment today looking at some other ones. So I'll come back. I have another appointment looking at some other one. I got a lot of business to conduct today. So I don't know if I can pencil you in. But inside. I'm a silent response.

Inside and go, what the fuck? Yeah. I do that too. I don't wear luxury clothes or any of that shit. Because, you know, you look at this sticker. It was a T-shirt at Louie or something. It's like $700. Just so I can get sweet baby raise on it an hour later.

For me, I can't do luxury clothes. With all flats? Yeah, right. Yeah. That's funny, man I've gone into And it's so funny Because my wife doesn't even want it

But like I'm such I'm such a just an idiot And like bad with money That I'm like Oh, she'll want an expensive purse It's Christmas Yeah I don't know

I'm not good at giving gifts This is what you see in the You know a movie This is what I'll do And I went in And I didn't even buy her that expensive I bought to let you know But like I was in there

And I was like I was a little drunk You're wearing a wet bathing suit You got to be a little booze I was all boozed up in a wetbeds. I was leaving the beach. Oh, really? Where was this? Is it in Hawaii?

In Hawaii. Okay. But that's a place where you can get a ride off. They're tax a little cheaper? Yes. So mentally, you're like, this is a good deal.

Yeah. I got to buy it here versus New York. Uh-huh. And like, I'm so good at jazzing myself up like that. Yeah. They just knew I bought it in Puerto Rico. Yeah.

It was very just so out. And I'm like, oh, you like, turn a thing. I look to what? I'm like, oh, 700 bucks. Not bad at Christmas. You know, I mean, a pretty good year. Like, take care of this, brood?

And then, like, the one next to that's like 17,000. You're like, all right, I think I've seen everything I need to see today. Yeah. I rushed my case here. I don't know if I told the story on here. It feels like a great story to tell on here based on that. And I, I'm sorry if I said it before, but I was dating a girl for like three years. And I ended up buying her a purse.

This was like early 20s. And it was like way, way out of my comfort zone. And I just was like, to your point, I was like, let me just. Let me do it. You think that's what you're supposed to do. I just, I fought it for. so long and then to you I go whatever I could do this show this but uh you know it's like it all come back whatever you bet you're a rapper right right right so four digit number or five digit

number four okay but but I was like 25 maybe like I was just starting to get some traction in comedy and I mean I mean the crazy part is we were a year into dating this is and it was kind of like it wasn't my idea it was kind of like this wow Christmas is coming up wouldn't it be crazy if this was a you know it's like trying to get a lease on a used one in there I got this on Timu So I go A bunch of squirrels in it

Yeah yeah yeah I just said whatever fuck Okay fine fine Like it was kind of just If I do this Everybody will be happy Because in my head I'm logical

I'm like Well you've said this past month You need a new blow dryer You need this You're tired of your keys Getting a lot Like there's just so many things That I think

These are the logical gifts But this was just like The one thing she really wanted I go whatever fine Fuck it I go to pay with her next to me Because she picked it out When she was with me

card declines. I'm on the phone with Chase Bank. I'm on the phone with Chase Bank. Like, yes, I made this purchase. It still, you can try again. I try again. It doesn't work. She goes, you can just put it on my card.

And I'm like, yeah, but then you get the points. Yeah, she ended up paying for it. And I had to like literally. That's a tough look, dude. I think the Venmo payment was capped out of something. You had to do like three payments. I had to have my business manager be like, hey, why are my girlfriend at the time?

Babe, what's your routing number? God. That's a tough look. You know, it just took all the love at the time out of it. It took any care. And like, no girl wants to deal with that. It takes you doing it. Yes, all of its goal.

A girl wants to wake up. It's under the tree. There it is. Nobody wants to see a guy be like, yeah, Trevor Wallace, December 30th, 1992. I authorized these charges. Yes, exactly. So that was, that was, man. That was tough.

Dude, I had a buddy. We moved to, I moved to New York. In my first day here, he took me out. He lived here. He's like, you know, I'll go. out we'll get drinks so it's me it's like three or four of us he orders and this bartender was the hottest woman I've ever seen in my like literally the hottest woman I've ever seen in my life and I'm like New York is the greatest city in the world this is crazy and he is like out of a movie

I'm like this is so cool and he orders around a drink slides or his card it gets declined and it comes back and she's like this point it was declined he's like it all right it happens all the time you know what I mean like run this one and she comes back she's like that that was also a decline and we're like Dude, what the fuck? He goes, I knew the second one wasn't going to work, but I had to go down swinging. He's like, I had, like, maybe for some reason I did go through,

and I saved face. Before I pick up a shift, I got at least try the city bank card. He's like, it wasn't going to, I got denied the first time. She's not interested. Yeah, it still has a sticker on it. It's called to activate. It's a gift card. With the purse, you can't go back to the apartment and try to make a move after that either.

Oh, man. You know, I'm trying to think how the day played out. It was not great. If I had to guess. No, no. And that to me, like, that was a crazy purchase. Overall, I mean, like, it was like 5K in a year of dating. Yeah.

I mean, do my wife got a $700 person? We've been married fucking seven years. I think I was just younger. And I think I was just like. Young and dumb. Yeah, young and dumb. And I also was like, this will satisfy that. You know, I just, I felt like I was almost like, and this is not a great way to put it at all.

But I felt like I was like feeding the meter. I'm like, sure. This will get me to, this will buy me six months of like, Trevor's not a bad guy. Trevor's of a good boyfriend. You know, this, there is, okay. Sure, of course. Yeah, he's pushing the ball down for like, okay, he's a good boy.

He's interesting. He's committed this much. He's done this. In the worst way of possible, I was like, this will make everybody have. This will solve this problem right now. Yes, this will solve this problem right now instead of like the logical things that I was like, oh, well, like, what about somebody? What about something homemade?

It's something that's like from the heart. And then I just was like, the car decline. I'm sweating. How much long did you guys make it after that? Two years. We did it for three years. She's a great woman, but I think at that time I was just so like... That's what you say after a divorce. She's a great woman.

It's just at that time. Great woman. We're still real good friends. But you know, it's like this was my first like serious girlfriend and I had only like maybe got like gifts for somebody I was like starting to see or or relative. You were never that pot committed to be like, okay, now I got to get you a grown-up gift. Absolutely. And I was like it like in my head, I was like anything else.

over 250 is an insanely expensive gift. Like if somebody gave me a $250 gift card, I'm like, what do I owe you? Drop the trouse or, you know? So five grand to me was just like, you know, I'm doing math. And I'm like, dude, that's like, I think my apartment at the time was like two grand a month. I'm like, dude, that's like fucking two months. Yeah, it's crazy. And, you know, you start running these numbers in your head.

But then you're comparing, I guess love versus like a dollar amount. Then you're putting a number on it. And I wasn't happy that. It was not a good day. You're reliving that day. A lot of math going on. I remember even telling that to a therapist years later. He goes, five K for a year dating.

It's crazy. Talking about therapy? Yes. He's still talking about it. Oh, my God. Yeah, no, literally. He's still talking about this is probably four to five years ago. I don't know what my wife would have to.

My wife just had a kid and I don't know what you would have to do to get a $5,000 gift. Yeah. The therapist makes you pay cash moving forward after that. Got getting me on that. Yeah, it was you live and you learn. My parents when I was a kid If something like that ever did come up

Like the year we got a Sega or something like that This is your Christmas present And your birthday present Right That's what you stretch Yeah I'm a December 30th baby So I get I get thrown in everything Get everything

So it's like here's your holiday Here's your your birthday Don't talk to me for a year Would you get fucked? Would it be Or would it be over there Were they overcompensing like here's a great week You know

So I was raised Jewish so we would do Hanukkah and sometimes it would Give you 10 nights at least You have a bonus two nights Hanukkah's not a big money maker right For you guys as far as the presents No it's kind of I think about it

It's like a restaurant there's like one big meal And a bunch of appetizers and a dessert So it's like you know you might get Some real big night one but night two Like one year I got a roll One night out of the eight nights I got a roll tape from my dad He goes well you love tape

Like how did you wrap the gift with my own gift You're a piece of shit Scotch tape Scotch tape Did you love tape that much I mean I love tape But like What do you mean you love tape

I think you'd be talking about that In therapy He's like I love tape Just as much as the next kid Loves tape What making the fingernails and stuff I don't even know I couldn't tell you

I was just a crafty kid I would just like make shit Make it tape it up I lick the glue a little bit Trying to get fired up Reverse whip it or something Try to get a buzz going Yeah

But I think that that was probably You know They had six out of the eight gifts six nights and then they're like fuck it what do we what is this kid like give them give him one of the batteries there was a crispy roll of tape I will say but like you know it's funny because you're

ordering you don't know what you're opening each night so it's like I open that and my sister gets a Claire's gift card for a hundred bucks I'm like tape I got tape was pretty pretty garbage that's wild but but it it makes for a good it's like I remember that gift over anything else I got the year sure

sure tape yeah it's a traumatic memory of course you can I think I'm trying to hang myself with it later. What was the biggest... It was double-sided? What was the biggest president you ever got as a kid? Do you remember that?

Oh, that's a good question. Like a PS-something or... I wasn't a big video game family. I wish. I got a hand-me-down Xbox growing up. That was tough. Damn. Not even 360.

Just the regular Xbox. There's a porno in it. There was San Andreas by Grand Theft Auto, which was pretty beast. Best, biggest gift I got. I got a... One year, my dad got me some dumbbells. pretty cool no shit oh yeah yeah that was pretty cool i think i learned to defend you some yeah i was 13 and it was like uh from big five and you could like spin the sides off and put more weights on

it trying to think it's another good good gift that's not bad that's a good gift he figured he's playing with all the tape he's probably taking a heat at school got him out of fight yeah i think he had a drum set one year that's all right a lot of like a real drum set or more like a toy it was pretty solid my dad was a drummer growing up so he was uh so he kind of was in the now and so i think it was a little also a little bit of a gift for him to be like you know these are these are dw's kid these are good shout out to dw yeah no that one brand i know yeah that was uh that was probably a one of the the bigger biggest gifts i think that's not bad i want to hit you with a couple of the newer questions that we have so please please spend a minute um you're are you in an apartment or you got the house got the house you got the house you own this

house i do you do okay what's the uh leasing it's pre 35 year lease it's all eve yeah yeah is there any cereal in the home. Boxes of cereal. No, I don't believe so. Are you kidding me? No. You don't have any cereal at your house. That's a nice guy.

I love cereal though. Yeah, people aren't banging cereal like that. Like the life you're living. No. God damn cereal import tax. I was going to ask you is a cereal on top of the fridge. But I guess it ain't. The fridge is like it's in some wooden panels.

It's like hidden. Oh, is it? You got a couple of bucks. Okay. Not a big Not big Well, well Well

Mr. Pre-owned porch Look at you Is there a pool at this house? I'm sweating Did you have this house When we were here? I think so Because I think I remember talking

That like the backyard Has like It's like a pool coozy Oh I don't remember that It's like the size of maybe Two of these tables They call that like a lap pool Kind of

Or something You couldn't A what? Lunge It's essentially the size of like two cold plunges. Yeah. It's like in the summer, if you don't heat it or you don't touch it, it feels like a pool,

but it is a jacuzzi mainly. How often you win that? Never. Once every three months. Yeah. You'd have a pool guy for something like that or not? You too, funny enough. It comes over with the rake.

He does two scoops, gets three leaves out. He's like, you call it it's a pool. It throws like a little, uh, a little tide pod in there and we're good to go. Yeah, it's pretty funny. That's one of his stops. Yeah, but let's talk about that chili pad. Chili pad. Chili.

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Sleep and comfortable. Uh-huh. It actively cools or warms your bed by using water. It's a thermostat for your bed, and water is the key here. Fans just move hot air around like a bozo. That's all the fan does. We're talking about the chili pad. He uses actively chilled water to cool the bed. Oh, God.

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if you don't like it with their sleep trial. Visit www.s.l-e-e-p.com.combe.com dot me slash garbage and never wake up hot and tired again. Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay. Hmm. You're going to decorate the house for Christmas? Get cute with it?

Uh. I guess you're Jewish. Yeah. But I do like some holiday cheer. There you go. I got some home good stuff from last year I can throw up on the mantle. Do you throw a manure up and do the lights? I got a manure somewhere.

My parents live like 40 minutes for me, so I usually, they decorate and I'll go to their house for that. Very night. Get your holiday cheer in there. Yeah. How do you feel about the bread and butter pickle? Inchamma? Was there a comma after bread and butter?

No, bread and butter. How do you feel with the bread and butter pickle? What is, like a physical, like a pickle? And the kind of butter pickles? You've missed on this question quite a few times. You got no cereal? You got no bread and butter pickles? What are I going to eat if I come over?

Are you saying like, how do you, is... Do you like bread and butter pickles? You don't know bread and butter pickles. You keep saying it. Is it bread with butter and then a pickle? No, it's on a bread and butter pickle. What is this? You're Jewish.

You don't know bread and butter pickles? This is nuts. This ain't on me. No, I don't know. Yeah, a type of sweet and tangy pickle made with a vinegar-based brine that includes a significant amount of sugar and a specific blend of spices. I'm not familiar with this. I like a dill. Just a straight-up dill.

I like dill. I don't like those sweet pickles or any of that. What's that one called? Bread and butter. Is that it? I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan. Not welcome in my home.

Yeah, I'm a kosher spears guy. Could have yes-handed me on that while. I didn't know what you were talking about. Is this a term everybody should know, bread and butter pickle? I got to be honest, I didn't hear it until he started asking it. That's, you were a weird kid. Okay. I think I've heard of a butter pickle or something.

It's like a sweeter. I'm going to fucking lose it. That's bread and butter. Luke, back me up. B and G. B and G pickles. A little sweeter. I need this bullshit.

Not my favorite. Have you ever posed for a picture with a cigar? Oh, of course. It's like college didn't exist. Was there anything better than that? I literally have a photo that I just saw in Snapchat memories recently.

It's me in the Vegas strip smoking a cigar with Mickey and Minnie Mouse. I don't remember paying them. So I was 22. I was wearing fraternity letters on smoking a heater. in front of Mickey and Minnie. They were probably also smoking it for being honest.

It's a Vegas strip. Sure. Do you put your hand on a wall when you're at the urinal? Mm. Or you're like a no touching anything kind of guy when you're there? I have before if it's like if it felt like I was overfilled. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. I'm not at that age yet. You have an automatic pepper grinder at the house? No, that's crazy. My pepper grinder is actually broken. and it seldomly all twist it and then it all fall out. That's the worst.

I never knew how to use them when I was a kid. That might as well have been fucking ancient technology. Yeah, it's like the kitchen's nice, but my appliance is great. The amount of times I flipped scrambled eggs with a spoon is unheard of. That's wild. But, you know, where am I? You're ruining that pain. Are you cooking on?

Absolutely. You're eating all that teflon. Yeah, I cook a lot of breakfast. The rest of the day is kind of miscellaneous. Okay. Are you at the house most of the day? Yeah. When you're not on tour?

Yeah. I work from home. You're working from home. You're doing a lot of that. What are you doing? An Uber Eats? Uber Eats or, yeah. Yeah, because I got a few, like, people that come over.

You got a crew. You got the crew. So, yeah, it's like, I always feel like an asshole if I'm like, I'm going to go upstairs and cook. And then they're all just starving, snacking on slim gyms and a couple chumps. You straighten everybody out for lunch? Buy me? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Try to keep them happy. Good guy. What kind of luggage you're rocking with? A way bag? Okay. Not bad. I'm not one. I'm not one of those Ramoa insane people.

Are you a Ramoah guy? I don't even know what that is. Dude, Oh, my God. Away is like kind of what you have. It's just one of those like hard show. Yeah. The world of a base.

But is it a, what's a car? It's a brand. Away bag. Away. You know that? You don't know bread and butter pickles? It's nuts. What are you saying?

Aroma. Have you heard of this? Yeah, my girl's got one. Oh, it's insane. It's like a $2,000 suitcase and it's silver. You've probably seen him at airport. Lighttime warranty. Yeah.

So it's $2,000. You can't fit shit in it. Whoa, it's kind of, that's, I mean, just even... Is it one of the motorized ones that you can ride? No. Those are cool. You got a manual this bitch. Oh, wow.

Okay. Look at that. So you've probably seen those at the airports. That's like, 007 type. But it's one of those things that if you don't know what it is, you're just like, oh, it's a normal suitcase. Yeah, I just, I never assumed they were like expense. I never assumed that was anything. They got a phone case on there.

It's $180, $190 for a Ramoa, and it's not even mag safe. What are we doing? What are we doing here? I can't charge this, bitch. The wheels stink. on the bags? Yeah, because I always got to carry my girls and it's like the wheel

stink? Yeah. Like smell or they're just no good? No, they're just no good at the mobility. Oh, yeah. What do you do with your nose down there? Freakow? You got to put it up there and you go, that's a man with a closet and it's foot fetish.

If you asked me. I went to buy a suitcase at T.J. Max and we opened it up to look in it and it smelled like fish on the inside. Like it was used. So I paid extra. You had any pickles laying around back there? We were put on to,

I didn't do it, but someone on the team went out of a, Briggs and Riley. Yes. Oh, what are we cooking with you? Ali Sadiq put us on to these. Lifetime warranty. Apparently very good.

$729 for the 22-inch carrying. That's too expensive to me. To me, it's like what you get for a whatever? What's a Samson I call it? $199 or whatever. You know what I mean? It's like you're not going to give me $500 of value in a fucking super. Where I always mess up is I buy the cheaper version and then try it for a little bit and

then it's shit and then I end up buying the expensive one. I know. So I ended up losing money in the end because I could have just got the expensive one from the get-go. I go middle of the road with that kind of. Give me something the last two, three years as much as we travel. I'll spend 200 bucks and I'll go to three years. But I had one, I just got like one of these like dupes from the away bagger or any of these on Amazon. Like a wheel like shattered off.

I'm lugging around selling out shows with three wheels. Well, it also is one of those things where it's like you don't think about it until you're using it. I'm already at the fucking airport. Then you're one of the guys buying luggage at the airport, like a goddamn terrorist. You know what I mean? I've always been to get the cheaper one and it sucks. Your whole life is, you've never made the right decision. It's crazy.

I buy shoes and sneakers sometimes at clothing stores. I'll go to an H&M and be like, let me get the pair of shoes. I'm like, they're $12. Not H&N. They're like, they're half rubber. You have these at 12. They're like, we have every size. Nobody's buying these.

We got halves. We got quarter sizes. We make them in the back. It's a mold. I also always get sucked into buying a pair of sunscreen. glasses at a clothing store. You know, they have them like up and they'll have them like as an impulse. Of course.

Yeah, I think they look cool. And Cologne. I bought Cologne from the big and tall store. Tatee like bacon. Bread and butter pickles. You're spraying it down with Pam on there. Will you listen to it with the radio in the shower? Do you have a radio in the shower?

Or a music device in the shower? Not really. I like the shower for the, I like give some good shower thoughts. I like quiet, actually. Hmm. Not too bad. But, you know, everyone's sort of all bringing a Bluetooth in there. Like I'm back in color.

I'm just never in there long. And I like put it on, I get like a half a song. I'm like, hey, I'm just standing in here so to listen to music. I've started to with my new routine. I bring the, uh, the Alexa in there. And I get that gone and floss and take my time, do my little routine to my, um, uh, toner, moisturizer, all that shit. The guys that bring on the road with me, both openers, they use, uh, they play off the iPhone.

iPhone shower. You can't even hear it. It doesn't work. Listen, it's louder for us than it is for them. Yeah. I agree with that. Dave, those speakers and the, they've, they've, they've, gotten better, but they used to be so bad.

You used to have to put it in a glass to get the echo. Yeah. I once had an Uber driver driving with a phone and a cup playing the music. That's crazy, dude. That's wild. Yeah, let me get that all. It was probably a lift the more I think about it. How do you feel about chips on a sandwich?

I like it. But homemade. It's like if a restaurant tried to do it, I'd be like, you can't infringe on this. I appreciate that. They'll do that in a New York City bodega. Yeah. You'll go, hey, let me get the. fucking chop cheese and hand them a bag of

Oh, yes, I've seen that. And they'll do that. I didn't realize until later on in my New York City tenure that they would do that for you. But I do have a couple of Patreon questions that get to. Guys, as you know, when you're doing the old Patreon, we'll get to your garbage question. This one's from Lance, $14 Canadian dirt bag here. Is it garbage or go to a bowling alley in a walking boot when you have a broken foot? You can't get a shoe on that. You'll be slipping all over to a way.

Put some grip tape on the bottom. I'm a big proponent of any kind of obscure medical device. If you're in one of them, you've got to live a bit of a more limited life. You don't get to go bowling until after it comes off. Is that a fair assessment? If you're on the injured list, you're on the injured list. What are you doing? I go hang out.

Be a glue guy. Hang out. Have some beers. I'll keep score. Whatever. They also got that contraption for kids where it's like just like the roll cage. Did you see that? Just giving that.

That's not bad. He can bowl from his seat back there. Or you have a friend and be like, oh, I'll bowl for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm with that. But you don't want two broken legs leaving out of that bitch. That's even worse. Those things are slippery.

I'm bad in those bowling shoes. They're giving more and more people those boots. Boots are everywhere. You see the boots or them scooters. The scooter boot combo's crazy. That's, dude, back in the day, you saw someone on the scooter. They survived a war. Now it's like you turn your ankle and they're giving them to them.

I don't even like you ask it. man I don't even like asking what happened because if they say it's not broken I'm immediately like that's stolen valor you're a pussy They're like while I tore a ligament in my left toe Shut the fuck up They put the I would tell a doctor And I just give me a give me I'd rather a cane

Yeah Than walking zoom in zipping up on this thing The scooter's tough It's such a bad look Were you ever on crutches as a kid? No I want it to be though Yeah

It was good There was attention dude Guys that would milk it off and do it good They look good. I couldn't use them. The football players are really good at it. If you could get a good lean. Yeah, because they would position it where the tripod or where the tripod, Jesus Christ, I'm an influencer.

Talk about a creator brain. The triceps are kind of cranking out where they got the jersey and it's like cut up here. I mean, you're injured on game day. Still rocking the jersey? Got the jacket on or something? Yeah, that's a modern day coming home from war for any chick in your sophomore class. Yeah. Sure.

For sure. I could never do them good like that, though. I always look like a fucking idiot. I didn't know how to get the rhythm in them. in the crutches. On the crutches. You'd be a fucking one of the wheelie guys for a shore, dude. I see.

I once saw a guy down the shore in Keenan's Irish pub wearing a neck brace at the bar. And I was like, dude, go home. You don't belong here, dude. You don't belong here. It's a startling thing to see. I would rather you have the dog cone on your head than a neck brace. It's just, there was a guy in front row in Jacksonville, if that says anything about the type. One of my favorite shows ever,

but the guy in the front row with a neck brace. He's probably the mayor, dude. It's just so startling. It's a lot because... It's a little off-putting as well, if we're going to be honest. Yeah. And the newer ones that have the plastic that looks like... Yeah.

It looks like the base of Darth Vader's... Yeah, put a turtleneck on and shut off. Cover that thing up. Yeah, just get a turtleneck and put some, like, metal underneath it so we don't have to see it. Oh, damn, dude. Oh, that's great. All right, listen, this one's greatest from Mid-Atlantic Dirtbag, $10 boner here. Is it garbage if you use chat GPT to look up discount codes?

That, does that work? Yeah, it's got it. Right? It's got to. Give me the most benefit. You know, if that's what you ask, give me the most, the biggest discount code, brands are going to be getting fucking slammed left and right. Yeah.

Is there anything you use chat GPT for? My chat, jipt is fried. It's, I think the long you have it, the worst. worse the shit you use it for always. I don't disagree with that. When I first got it, I was like, help me make a diet base with iron efficient stuff. Now I'm like, why is it called a sperm whale? Like it's never.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. I've never used it for anything beneficial at all. I wouldn't know how to get on it. I honestly wouldn't. It's not the matrix. It's a website? Website and app, yeah. You got to pay for it?

No, it's all free, but you can get like an upgraded version, which I don't know what that does. I'm out. Can it do pictures? Is that what it does? It doesn't make people. You can do it. You can do both. Yeah.

You can do both. But I could be like, where's the best bread and butter pickle in New York? And it would say, here you go. Be in the know. Do that. Best bread and butter pickles.

Best bread and butter. But there used to be so many websites that could do that. I forget what it's called. There was an app that did, but there was like, honey was one. There was like some browsed. They were like,

they sponsored pods for a while. And like it did work, but you would always have to like download it as like a plug in. Yeah. There was like a website that everybody used to use back in the day like the same way we'd watch movies in college or his website There was like a website that everybody would use like you get like hidden codes or something No shit can't remember what it's called that was more that was I think I remember what you're talking right there was a there was a website that did that Yeah give you the promo codes

Fuck my computer just died we have time for one more anyway Let's do it let me just pull it up on my on me phone There's something wrong with this computer too this was fully charged about and what's yours now Dude I've been I just got a lot Destroy like four computers. Nice. Brand new. I never had a laptop my life.

Really? Yeah. It's crazy. How did it? He owns a production company. It's crazy. I never had one. And what would you do?

How would you? Where? Anything. To get my bread and butter pickles? But you had a PC at home or something? No. Mac at home? Years ago, but I didn't do anything.

How did you ever use the internet? Phone? My phone. It's crazy. It's crazy. Zoom meetings, phone? Yeah. Editing, phone.

Look at notes. Well, we do Zoom meetings here. But there's been Zoom meetings here. But there's been Zoom meetings. where he's like, let's just do this from home and we call in and he's the only guy on his phone. Is that bad? He's in the wrong shape. Anytime somebody's on a phone in a Zoom meeting, I go, I don't need your opinion.

Yes. Thank you. What do you mean? I'm the creative. When somebody joins in their in their car. Correct. Talent can do that. But like, if there's an executive or somebody on there or they're like walking, I go, you couldn't have.

You ain't got five minutes. Turn your camera off. Oh, I'm walking around all the time. Yeah. He's in a shower to one time. Probably lost the deal. I'll get up and go from my bedroom to the kitchen to get a coffee or something.

You're always on the phone? Never a laptop ever? He's never had a laptop. I guess that's probably crazy to you. Dude, he got a laptop and I needed to use it the other day because this is broken. It's over here. I went on and I went to look at something to YouTube

and it was, I'm not even fucking around. It was blank because there was nothing to even recommend because he's never put a word in it. It was, it was said, what do you enjoy? And there was not one video up like for you. I've never seen it.

You could probably sell that. That's like a rare, like an untapped algorithm. Fucking air gas. A unbiased algorithm. Oh, wow. Am I going to have that? Am I kind of starting fresh with this thing? Yeah.

What was the first thing you do when you got the laptop open? First of all, to get it open, it took them about 10 tries. They have a weird, they have a weird code. It's like swiping the keys and my X wasn't working or my Z. It's my password from fifth grade. Yeah. It's literally just the bottom letters. Yeah.

All I've done is open. MacBook, PC? A MacBook. Okay. I don't know. I'm not an animal. A PC. He's never had...

That's crazy to me. Oh, like, been the... Yeah, never. What would you do on flights? Just watch everything on a phone? He's a big phone guy, though, yeah. I got the movies. He's this.

You know, he's this. Oh, yeah, I'm that. You know he's going to be in a bad mood if you're a head, and he's looking like this. He's watching some videos he shouldn't be watching, and he's getting charged up. I do that at the house now. Instead of sitting down and watching...

watch a TV. I'll sit, I'll go to the kitchen. If I'm eating something, I'll go to the kitchen where the cutting board is. I'll open the spice drawer. I'll put my phone up like I level and I'll eat standing up and watch. I come hang out. Drive the car. I got a spice rack on the way. We can get two popped up pretty soon. I get your bread and butter pickles. I think you'd like to be honest. All right. Let's see. We got time for one more here. Um, This goes back to the etiquette. This is from Paul $10 investor. If you're at a service counter,

deli, coffee shop, wherever, and the person has their back to you, what is the etiquette on getting their attention? Do you say something? If there's a bell, do you ring the bell? Do you try to make some sort of noise, or do you just wait for them to finally notice you? Mr. Wals?

And what's the time period you wait? See, I hate confrontation. I'm waiting. You're just going to have. You're going to wait? Yeah. If he's right. Dair turned around.

But what is he doing? Is he making a sub? He's on the phone? Who's a wrapping fish? I don't know. You know, I might fake a phone call. Hello? I would make some noise.

Hello? Oh, sorry. Oh, yeah, no, take your time. What are you guys doing? That's pretty good. I'll give you that. I'll do something like that. Man, long day.

It's cold outside. Hit him with something like that. Yeah. The ring in the bell seems crazy. That's weird. Just you just right now that you say that, I'd be scared. I just feel like it puts their body in like a shock. It's like every day.

They're traumatized by that bell. Every time they hear it, it correlates to work and needing to work. And like in an urgent manner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not like a chill vibes. If you get there, maybe he's in the back and you don't see anybody. The back is fine. You hit the bell.

But first of all, we talk about this with Stobby. Delly guys scared his shit out of me. Yeah. They seem like to fucking knock you to fuck out. I always hate when they ask me about metrics. Metrics. Well, they'll be like, how much do you want to this? I'm like, a quarter pound?

I don't know anything about it. What's enough for me? What's enough for a guy like me? What would I? I want. You or me, what would you get? I was at a butcher in Dallas one time. That hell?

It's like a country song. I was at a butcher in Dallas one time. You should have seen her. But these guys scare the shit out of me because this guy's got a slab of brisket the size of a U.S. map. And I'm like, what does a quarter pound look like? I don't know, man, a quarter pound. I'm like, how the fuck. Yeah, I don't do this for a living, bud.

Like, here's how dumb I am. He could have done anything with his hands and I would have been sold. Yeah. Like, just it doesn't have to be proportion. but when a waiter does the side, how big is a pizza? It's about this big. I don't fact check it. Yeah.

I don't check their work later. Just give me any sort. Give me something. I could have been like, what's a quarter pound of briskin? He's like, that's about like this thing. All right. Yeah. But for him to say, I don't know, it's a quarter pound.

I'll do a half a half. That's a dick move. It is, but I got a half pound after that just to one up. So maybe it's an up sale tactic. Fuck you. Let me get a half pound in that. Give me a half pound of that brand new Porsche over there. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Trevor Wallace, one of the absolute best in the

Business. Thank you for having me. One of my favorite podcasts to do. Always so much fun. Thank you, Alpha Beta Mail Tour. Get your tickets to Trevor Wallace.com. Coming to a city near you.

Coming to a city near you. This guy's an absolute pro. Kills it on the internet. Buddy, we love you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Kepie, what do you got for? Guys, we're on the road as well.

Philly, get those tickets to the Met. The boys are coming home. Tickets available for the Met. Are you Garbage.com. Love you. Trevor, we love you. Love you, buddy. Gang, we love you.

We'll see you next week. Peace.