Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Rehab with your Dad w/ Kippy & Foley

Episode Date: October 20, 2022

Are You Garbage is back with a Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. Its a fun one! FINAL RUN! Buy the Are You Garbage Card Game: https://areyougarbage.bigcartel.com/ Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/hfoleycomedy/ Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://www.bonfire.com/store/are-you-garbage/ Ladder Life: https://www.LadderLife.com/GARBAGE Displate: https://www.displate.com Promo Code: Garbage Better Help: https://www.BetterHelp.com/GARBAGE Support the show by downloading the DraftKings Sportsbook App and using the code AYG. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/LA/MI/NJ/PA/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/NH), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org/chat (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), call/text TN REDLINE 1-800-889-9789 (TN), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA).   21+ (18+ NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/LA(select parishes)/MI/NH/NJ/ NY/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. New customer offer void in NH/OR/ONT-CA. $200 in Free bets: New customers only. Valid 1 per new customer. Min. $5 deposit. Min $5 wager. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Ends 9/19/22 @ 8pm. Early Win: 1 Early Win Token issued per eligible game. Opt in req. Token expires at start of eligible game. Min moneyline bet $1. Wagering limits apply. Wagers placed on both sides of moneyline will void bet. Ends 1/8/23 @ 8pm ET. See terms at sportsbook dot draftkings dot com slash football terms. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans

Got a news flash for you bozos the card game is back on sale. Oh my god The original edition of the card game some of our favorite questions right here Got about 50 or so of them sold a bunch of them Put them on the shelf for a little while now We're doing one final run of the original series one last job, baby It's a good good time to get hammered with your friends and find out at the people that you know That you love her garbage so do yourself a favor the link is in the description Pick up a pack today because they're gonna go quick. Oh, yeah, and that ain't it tubby. We got road dates, baby

We got two shows in atlanta coming up in november Then we're going to charlie north caroline if you're in the area get those tickets for that We got two and filly that are sold out. We got one left in providence road island those tickets are moving We've got one left in boss and that is for sure going to sell out get those tickets We want to party. See you there. See you there Welcome to another exciting edition of Are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals? Or absolute trash

Now here are your hosts kevin ryan and h foley Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is are you garbage? Oh, yeah, big three. I'm your host h foley coming at you on a beautiful day We're down here at until these basements. She just went out the home depot bought a bunch of pumpkins and a pellet gun Okay, in case the neighbors kids start to get cute. She'll break right in the eyeball Okay, my co-host is coming at you from across the table the third time CEO of are you garbage? He's an international businessman. He's not to be trifled with in the boardroom or the bedroom Give it up for kj kevin james ryan. Hey gang. Thanks for tuning in as always

Please make sure you rate with you subscribe on itunes over there And then if you go to youtube, we got a full video over there in 4k. Don't want to add and those numbers are true to rope It's cooking almost at 100k get us to 100k hit the subscribe button Yeah, even if listen if you're out there and you're a listener and there's a bunch of you just the listeners on itunes I see those numbers every week. Don't there's a lot of use just go subscribe get the numbers What are we doing? Let's get that cool plaque in here melt it down make a cross out of it I'll be rocking my youtube chain go werewolf hunt Silver bullet style

Uh and then obviously the greatest goddamn website of all time which is cook god cook god cook it baby. Hmm, I Numbers over there doing all right check out patreon.com slash r U garbage You get episodes of a ug every week you get that every week you also get a fucking hard feelings That's the $10 home. These are the ones really making out like bandits Yeah, I've got a 20 level with a bunch of vlog stuff. We do on the row. We bring new guy luke He shoots everything we're doing a bunch of that stuff and we got a fit down level check the fuck out Yeah, a lot of value over there for your dollar sure bang for your buck and in these economic times

Who couldn't use a value? Sure. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm giving it back to the people. Yes How about a nice quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire the magic man makes us all look good He works the ones and twos he crosses the t's he dots the eyes. He's my best pal T-Bone McMuffin Toby McMullin everybody. What's up dudes? What up T-Bone? You two against each other? Yeah, how can you have two best pals? Well, I do wait you believe him when he talks? I'd sell the both of you's out. He told me that was a new shirt earlier today. This is my best gal. This is my wife They're both who is Amen sister

I do have a new one of these you saw it. It almost got ruined by uh, some uh wasabi almonds But I think I got the stain out. Sure. That's gonna be coming heavy bike. Did you do yoga in that shirt? No, why because the next little stretch down Yeah That neck did a little downward facing dog if you catch my drift. Yeah The shirts gain weight Bastards try to throw that shirt out he said namaste Whoa, look at you that was good stuff there

Fucking kippy carlin over here. Okay. Oh, he needs the ponytail. All right Had a little cancer. All right. Yeah, so what's cooking? Uh, nothing just got back from what I would argue I've been around this I've been around this goddamn country a lot. You have a lot of state We all have over the past year a lot of dates. Shout out to everybody coming out to the middle Middle-class famous tour. We love you love. Yes A lot of states we've been about 50 cities or so in the past 18 months to a year whatever that is 50 shows for whatever Um trashiest city. I've ever been to I know what you're going with Niagara Falls, New York

Hachi Machi let me tell you the town they forgot about What the fuck man? It's rough up there. Tell canada to take it the only thing and we did go off a little We did go a little off season, but I can't foresee a big big change. What is that in season? I guess in the summer. Yeah, I guess. Can you swim in it? What? No It's not shotgun full daddy We're talking heavy bike rapids. Oh really? I mean not rapids, but yeah We got on a boat went in that made of the mist. You did. Yeah. Wow a little scared

I mean, what are you not going to do it? It's the only thing you do you see the whole flood takes 10 seconds You should have ran a helicopter and fly around there I think they did they did have that but it was a rinky-dink chopper Not going with that dude a couple drops of water hit that blade The wind changes the wrong direction next thing, you know, you're fucking It's like the dunk tank end up in china. No way. I think not doing it. Um Yeah, man, we were up there for a friend's wedding and it was like two hours away

We're like, you know what? I'm never gonna come I went as a kid My wife's like, I haven't seen it. I was like, well, we're never gonna fucking be up here again That town was a little slow Yeah, I mean, that's you know, they were they were a little slow that's upstate, you know Sure slower slower pace slower pace. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but I mean, dude I waited an hour for breakfast At a diner up there. Mm-hmm best breakfast I ever had in my life. There you go. They're taking time putting love into it

Now where I ate when I was at Niagara Falls the rain forest cafe Yeah, there was a cheetah was my waiter If these goddamn butterflies all familiar I had that safari hat on yeah moss in my soup What's the ring was closed? I wanted the rainforest get you don't know the rainforest. It's like a hollywood, uh The hard rock. There was a hard rock up there. Wow. Yeah, it's like that. It's Not good foley. You have you do not understand how trashy this shit is It's covered in animatronic fake animals and they do it up with like fake fake foliage and shit

You know, like davin busters is like, hey, we're the sports theirs is and like you're in the jungle like the band that uh Chuck E cheese like those guys Sure, but a little more adult. It's like, you know, it's like you're on a movie set or something Not a good movie set independent movie set porn. You're on a porn shoot Oh the tiger fries, uh, yeah, it's stuff like that. We know we didn't go it was closed. Um They got a hot it's just I mean the whole the whole place is like and I was told The can the canadian side's way better. Yeah, there's a lot more money over there. It's just you know I mean, it wasn't even like a pizza shop or nothing. Hmm

I was fucking jammed up over that's just all out of town is this bad t-shirts keychains. Can't get any crab rangoon. I'm out 25 bucks to get on the old uh 25 beans to hop on the made of the mist 25 50 to hop on a made of the mist they charge it for the poncho Now I came with it. Okay. Yeah, and how close do you get to the falls? You're you're you're in there, baby Really soaked? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Isn't that dangerous? I was nervous Let me ask you if he drove into the falls would have put put the boat down. Is it coming down that hard? What do I look like I'm on the fucking Cornelian Marie? I don't know. I guess yeah

I mean, it's yeah, it's fucking it's one of the wonders of the world. Isn't it is it salt water or fresh water Fresh, but it tastes salt. It's salt. There's something in there a little stank on it. Yeah Probably sewage. No, it's really clean canadian. It's like fresh fucking Uh, it's from and there's no like eerie or something There's no pool where you can go swimming or something like that. I mean, I'm sure you could swim further away. Huh? Yeah, it's fucking I mean it's and I I went as a kid because we're trash We were like, well, let's go another thing. We were up in canada and we were like, oh, we're up here Let's take a look at it

Dude, we went to like madham tussaud's fucking wax museum. It's like time. It's like a really shitty time square. Jesus. Yeah It's bad. Uh-huh. There was like the weed trucks out on the fake weed and stuff. It's a fucking scene, dude Yeah, where did you eat? um We ate at a food truck indian food truck had a coddy roll two codderows They were fan fucking daystick. Okay, two of those and then that night we found this place wine on third, which was there like Hip socialite, you know, it was a bar for the most part, but had a okay Uh menu who's working there sesame street characters. No, no, no, no, it's just proper proper

Minnie Mouse This is the first time I ever saw that I we got the meat and cheese plate as an appetizer It came out with like 74 pounds of meat on it to the plumber. I was like they knew there was only like there's enough meat for like 12 guys There was I tried to count the number of pieces of uh, like pre-sliced Hormel pepperoni that were on there. It had to be it was more than a bag It was like he did one whole bag and I was like, now let me top it off with another bag It was a lot of priests make a whole pie with that. Oh, yeah, which I've never seen on a charcuterie board

It was right next to the jelly beans All black ones I thought they were things No, but it was a fun trick you gotta I'd recommend go see it. It is a thing But you do it after 10 seconds You walk to the falls. You go, holy shit. That's crazy. You hop on the elevator. You go down you hop on the boat There's an elevator. You gotta get down to falls. That's pretty cool. You get off You get on the boat on the elevator go through the rocks. No, just they built like a just a standalone tower, huh?

For fatties and then um fatties do that Sure sure a lot of fatties. Yeah, take your rascal scooter over the falls. Watch me do a flip, bro But then the whole thing takes under an hour you get there you see you go, holy shit This is crazy. You look you do your pics you send the ba ba ba ba You go down you hop on the elevator The boat comes every 15 minutes. There's the rides only like 12 minutes You go in there and you're done. You're like, all right. What the fuck what the fuck else we do? You hit madden two so's or sent a casino folks. Did you go to the casino? I did it

Figure we're going to you know, we're gonna be Vegas. So yeah Saving losing my money out there like a gentleman save the rent money. Sure. I feel you but that's pretty sweet If you get a chance go, but it's trashy. It's a good time Hotel was all right. Everything was I would do the grand canyon I don't know if I have any interest in agorfall especially after I saw your videos. It was like, all right I mean, it's pretty cool. I saw a video online. You posted something I didn't post nothing one of these did you follow my wife? Of course. We're friends on social media. Sure Certain check groups

Certain back pages Um Yeah, great canyon would be fun. It's one of those things you're like, I gotta do if you're that close You're like it'd be weird to not fucking do it. Yeah, grand canyon is different. That's real classy Are you? I don't think it is classy. What are you talking about? There's no pizza huts out there Well, it's just in the desert. Yeah There's no pizza huts in the heck of falls either. I want to go on record. This is the nicest whole I ever seen Well, you know when we flew to vegas uh with to

To do the shows with burt shout out to mr. Kreischer shout out to me burt crazler the best. Um We flew over the hoover dam You were sacked out or in an aisle or something like that. I got a good view of that. Mm-hmm that thing looked impressive I don't know how they dug that thing out. That was pretty sweet. Yeah, I don't get that Just even like I was watching them build a rest stop the other day. I was fucking I was driving home from the heger falls It was like I'm like that. Oh someone put up all of those bean. There's a crane put not like one beam and it took him like nine minutes And I'm like, this thing's gonna be here all week, buddy. I fucking wrap it up. Let's go

I need my annie and stat Trying to get some cologne Yeah, all right, but gang This is a family episode as you know as you know when you sign up pretty old patreon there You can have a question rattle on the air. You ain't lyin got a bit of a backlog. We promise we're gonna get to all of them And we'll do that Right now On who wants to be? Oh you got

Uh, we got a couple of heaters Uh, let's see This one this is from talker first time long time five dollar bozo respect it The good stuff, uh, is it garbage to keep the shoebox to store your new shoes in? I do this I found myself doing this. Is it a garbage to keep the shoebox to keep? Yeah, of course for a little while You keep everything I've just gotten to the point where I can break away from like I just got a new iphone I threw that box out immediately

But normally I would keep that for a couple of months. That's dirt bagment. I kept my tv box for like two three months I wasn't sure the warranty to return but I didn't know not and you gotta you're gonna have to fucking catch me slipping All right. Yeah, we had we had a uh a wolfgang puck pressure cooker Uh that my aunt gave us that you wanted the casino and we kept the crashiest sentence ever said on this show We kept that box It was signed

That was a kid's college fund. What are you gonna do here the puck man? That is John Hancock on there. You mean wolfie sign that? Yeah, wolfgang pucks. All right. I don't mind them If you're a 45 year old broad you love wolfgang pucks shout out to him It used to be emerald, but he's kind of falling off a little bit. They love uh, what's uh, they love gordon too ramsey Hey, get out of here with that euro trash. Oh, shit Fucking wolfie's euro trash. Yeah, but he's cool Ramsey's the coolest. He's yelling at everybody kick rocks with that guy Plus we had a one of his dumps down in ac

Kate puts who's great. What are you talking about? No Are you just saying that to win the argument? Yeah. All right fair enough guys. We've decided a gerbil in my mashed potatoes We've descended into foleyville early this episode Plus he wasn't even back there cooking. You don't know that could have been back there. I would have heard them actually Yeah Bloody drag slap this shit out of you Shut up you. Um, I'm a wolfgang puck. I'm always I always wonder why he hasn't got hit I'm sure he's had to

But if that would be they'd be showing that they'd be really leaning on that No, because then that would open the floodgates where people start smacking him around He goes into these small towns starts running his mouth I saw one where they thought I think I think it was in jersey strip mall And uh, yeah, what do you expect? It was what do you want from these people? They uh, they They accused him of planning a mouse I know exactly who you're talking about man that one dude was not having it. Yeah. Yeah

It was an old black lady, right? It was it was an old black family in the restaurant the one dude Was no bueno. Yeah trying that bullshit. Yeah, fuck out of here. Yeah. It was great food was probably delicious Or he started poking his fucking nose around in there Um Yeah, but I keep I got I got a box of three in the house right now shoes Yeah in the box. Have you warned them? No. All right. You haven't warned them. That's one thing Well, the ones are wrong size. They got fucked up the other one. I'm just kind of waiting on I have a I buy two if I like a shoe. I buy a replacement real quick. So I have it

This is a very funny conversation Given that the studio looks like an s and lg warehouse Yeah, shout out to kelly heart. Shout out to kelly heart. That's a bunch of clothes and fucking shoes We literally we're looking at amazon department store heavy bike Heavy bike. Hmm be doing the numbers on resale on these things For everything be gary v in it man Good stuff too man. Shout out to shout out. He was the man. Uh, this one's from man You know what he doesn't want that I want to get involved in I jump in a rope

Yeah, he does the weighted ones weighted ropes. Really? Uh-huh Might do that for fat court Pretty good. Uh-huh. Did you get jump rope and uh, I'm pretty good at it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want to not believe you But um, um, that's why I wouldn't just randomly be like I want to jump I was you said that about golf and I didn't believe it and he's actually pretty good Yeah, you just don't believe me is what it is. Well, you're a bozo. What are you talking about? Every time like I didn't believe you but you're actually good at that Hey, you never played an organized sport before

Yeah, I did you're a little squishy around the edges. What are you? I'm terrible, but I'm lying. What? Yeah, I don't lie. I said I'm pretty good at golf. I was pretty I'm pretty good at golf. You're a great at golf Yeah, compared to a fat idiot. Like, no kidding. That was me I don't know the gentleman Wait, I was gonna ask you what when you were a little kid did they roll in uh with um Jump rope for heart was the organization. You didn't have that day? No Oh, it was great. It was like half a day. It was most we're talking double dutch, right? That's what I'm good at

Really? No, he's talking about No way that it I would never have the the fucking gumption What I used to see when I used to see kids doing double dutch and they did it well I was like that looks like a magic trick. I I can't comprehend it crazy But we had this this squad I don't know what they were they were kids and obviously some adults would come Like once every couple years or every year It would take up

It was elementary school or maybe middle school. It would take up most of the day until Lunch, okay, and then we had a couple classes afterwards But it was called jump rope for heart and they would come in and we'd all be in the gym And they would do a bunch of demonstrations about jumping rope So Then you could buy jump ropes that give you some some crappy ones You'd go out on the floor and they'd show you how to do it. They did like a whole thing You didn't do any of this stuff. No, really can I get a google and jump rope for heart?

They've raised 1.2 billion dollars since 1978. There you go. It's a charity organization. There you go. What are the what's it for? Uh, it's just gonna give you a heart transplant in a couple of months It just says that they're the all caps premiere annual event for elementary school and middle schools with thousands of schools and millions of Kids participating across the u.s. Every year you ever get in give you a really into something for like two weeks That's what jump rope for heart did everybody who had them for a couple weeks Then they just went out. Yeah, that was big back then I feel you everybody was in and then you're like, what are we doing? Yeah, how's everybody fucking jump and rope? Yeah Fucking seems for the brawls. What are we doing here? Get a football dead Tommy

Learn how to fucking you can't do the throw a tight spiral. Can you do the rocky? The pitter-patter because I can just do the like I can do it. Yeah, I'm pretty good. Oh, you can do that Yeah, I mean like my endurance isn't good. I'm gonna get a little footwork. Yeah, I got a little bit of footwork I can do the doubles I can cross up What? Yeah. Yeah. Well, you have to see this. Okay. Are you kidding me? Yeah, I mean, I haven't done it in a while But I'm sure I'm I would put any I would put any amount of money I have that I could still give me like five minutes I could I'd be you're rolling about 19. You're rolling about 19 dollars on it. I'm willing to bet 1,300 dollars Those taxes are a bitch. All right, folks. There they are kip. How about that draft king? Oh, baby?

Love that draft king. How about dropping a little cash on the sixies this season Gang basketball is back through yourself a favor get on draft king sports book an official sports betting partner of the nba Spend a little money have a little fun They got all kinds of crazy deals going on throw down a five dollar bet you get up to 200 dollars if your team wins It's wild through yourself a favor. I like to bet on the sixties. I like to bet on the over I like a little parley. I know t-bone likes a parley. I'm starting to sweat just thinking about it Do yourself a favor and get on that draft king. Yeah, gang Just go to draft king sports book app opt-in and place a stepped up same game parlay today

It's easy peasy like the big man said i'm philly till i die also dabble in other teams if i see something That goes my fancy dirt bag. Yeah, come on. I like action, baby. I'm an action jacks. I got five here 10 here 500 air Whatever, let's go. Let's go. Keep it moving. Lay it out. Let's lay it baby laying up for losers Let's go. I'm the Celtics if it lines my pockets With payouts bigger than ever draft king sports book is where we go to bet on the nba in all sports Download the draft king sports book app now use promo code a yg Make any five dollar bet this week get 200 dollars in free bets If your team wins only at draft king sports book with promo code a yg minimum age and eligibility

Restrictions apply see show notes for details. Of course do it. Yeah, kippy. It's time for better help better help best in the biz The best in the biz gang. I get stuck on problems all the time. I get focused on the problem I get hung up on it. I sit there. I dwell on it. I worry about it. I'm shooting you straight here I'm telling you how my brain works and it's no good But you know, it's crazy if you go on better help they can help you to find the solutions Yep, and they help figure the things out for yourself So you move on from things you get on with your life and you keep going and you don't got to wait in some office You can do it all online and if you're looking for a specialist that you don't have in your area

Guess what better help can help you with that. Yeah gang. Uh, I recently signed up not too long ago I was a big fan of talk therapy for a long time hit a little bit of a rough patch in the old kipporino life He's real crazy. I'm back at it, but like somebody who's healthy. I'm working on my problems. There you go I roll towards the big man. I'm working on my problems. Yeah by giving them to me Uh gang, it's easy peasy the communication is great. You can send messages You can meet uh face-to-face like in uh on a zoom if you want or privately or whatever's up for you It's fantastic. So if you're thinking of giving therapy a try, I highly recommend it better help is a great option It's convenient accessible affordable and entirely online get matched with a therapist after filing out a brief survey and switch

Therapist at any time which is easy peasy when you want to join when you want a better Sorry, when you want to be a better problem solver therapy can get you there visit better help dot com slash garbage today Take a 10 off your first month. That's better help hlp.com slash garbage do it Yeah, I wanted to do that the ones I I love them They used to give us we're like it was like a rope. There was no handle on it I don't think there maybe there was plastic and there was like red white red white red. Oh those things were awesome They were all right and they were like b. Do you remember those those things stung? I hit by when the older kids would whip you one of those fucking whip. Yeah

Dude you catch it in the back that in my middle school. That's all they became was weapons The older kids were just chasing around they'd fold them in half or maybe fold them two times And then they would just have this like and they were like heavy plastic Because they would hit the plastic they were like plastic chains that would just hit Constantly had them with endure the whipping close your locker and just catch one of them in the eye. It's like Yeah, they were bad my brother my brother stole one one time and it was great He like came home and I'm like remember the stuff that was at school It was only just lived at school and then you're like he had one at home and I was where did you get?

It was like he was was like he was showing me a gun, dude. Yeah, I still I think where did you get this? I stole one of them beautiful, uh burgundy kick balls one time Oh, man smell them. I can hear oh had that thing pumped up to the max So patty found out don't make me go back and give it back really got me hemmed up dude ratted me out If you killed somebody and you went to patty, what would she say? Because a lot of that was What's the reason I killed them crime of passion? Uh road rage

No one saw You're not sure like there was no like yes for ranch. They gave you blue cheese and they show red Yeah, gotta kill everybody knows denny's now Um I don't know if she would drop dime on me She might give me a little cash to get out of town probably dye my hair Blunt you're drawing more attention to yourself Gotta get a nice tan

Bobby the flash Everybody the flashiest suit they had Uh, I don't know what about the piece would she uh, did she Road rage if I was if I listen, this is difference My generation if I was wrong She wouldn't they wouldn't they wouldn't back you up if it was something like mom. I was in a jam I got hemmed up, but but but but but she would she would be okay But my generation ain't like yours parents were like no

None of none of that why isn't billy playing you're not playing because you stink. Yeah, but that wasn't my generation I mean that wasn't your family. Yeah, I don't know if that was really my generation I think that was like a little that that was if we're looking at the generation is like The sprawling 20 years of a generation or whatever 15 years that was definitely the lower end of my okay my generation Because I remember hearing those just like the Participation trophy and shit that was all that wasn't that wasn't me. I remember I remember hearing the jokes about that shit Which uh, I still have mine hanging up. Thanks, Denise Uh, I don't know she would my but you have a jump rope trophy hanging up. No, I was kidding. I said participation trophy

Um, I don't know if she would She would probably get me a let me get a head start for sure She wouldn't be answering the door not answering the phone and where are you going? Where am I going down south to try to hide out in europe got that inner pull over there to snag No, that those the european you got to get to what swiss the switzerland or who doesn't who doesn't transfer out really I'd russia Ukraine yeah, that's nice Sharing a bunk bed with snowden. Uh, I don't know brazil right there's like south america. Where did they get? What's his name?

Who was the mac of feet mac of feet he got got down there the virus guy only guatemala or something There's like no change the dude that does the anti-protection. Yeah. He was also into a little uh, yeah Kill a guy. Oh, he did Legally, I know the dog snag somebody down in mexico the estate lauder guy They got him down in belize But he was trying to he was in belize, but he was trying to get to somewhere something He couldn't get out of belize because he got into belize all all bad paperwork. I just watched the documentary really Yeah, playing on my escape man

I'd go to argentina To the nazis went at least for a weekend Go get an open go ahead and all inclusive for the week All right, I gotta listen to go foley at the brunch counter He was he was at the hibachi table He had shrimp in nine shrimp in his mouth I gotta list the seven non extradition countries to consider. Let's go. All right. All right morocco This is very this is very patreon, but i'm in not bad uh, indonesia. No you go to morocco. I said not bad

indonesia no morocco. Yeah, hong kong indonesia gets a sneak out like a sore thumb. Where hong kong I'd have to become a crime boss down there Down there. That's the update down there. I don't think so over there. Whatever ain't going Plus they have they'd be chasing you with dog catcher nets I'd have to get in bed with the the yakuza And they ain't the cub scouts. I could tell you that That was very dangerous I'm sorry from uh back to back to school

The widgets you're gonna have to get the hell's a widget You're gonna have to get in bed with the that or the concrete pours. Let me tell you that's no walking the park All right, I apologize mr. Dangerfield Shout out to ron. Did I tell you the line? I've been listening to his old record And he said his father-in-law got a pacemaker until every time he sneezes the garage door opens All right, hong kong's out morocco. Maybe no i'm all morocco. Yeah, morocco is great. Yeah, and also okay. Yeah morocco United Arab Emirates Nope, you can have a lot of fun out there, but I don't think you can booze. No booze

You can't hit women Plus those guys are all fucking that shit up. Uh, where is it? Uh bolly or no bolly's. All right. That's not the UAE. No, that's um In asia, right? Is bolly in asia? Yeah No, wherever these bozos like Antonio brown are going fucking acting a fool They're gonna get all of us fucking shut down over there Because you're over there doing stupid shit. Those guys don't fuck around. I'll chop your hands off and shit like that Fucking fooling around at the pool I'm telling you

Fucking execute you for a pool noodle Okay All right, uh, andora. I don't even know where that is. Oh, uh, yeah, it's in chicago, isn't it? It's a restaurant He did he wasn't connecting it to anything. I'm glad you gave him that much credit The indoor is it the endoras? It's a whole country Really?

Man, they really aren't making the headlines, huh? Getting well laying low playing it right the kind of place you want to be that's very you want to be a place no one Ah, is that named chicago? I don't know. Yeah, I got my feet up on a beach somewhere. There you go Is it in the water? Uh, no clue. Uh, and then the last one is katar No, katar You'd be building one of the world cup stadium. No way get the fuck out of there Yeah, you got to go morocco casablanca style. Yeah, that's how you do it. They don't have extradition

So you could murder somebody here And go to and how you and get there and if you get to morocco, you're good They don't have anything where they uh, well the problem is, uh, they can Cut deals I believe Like they want you to have political leverage, but yeah, it's like yeah, they'll sell my fat ass in a heartbeat Kidding me

Or I could we can pick up move the whole shop over there Do it from a beach or something have to pay off them a little bit. Yeah, I like payoffs kickbacks that whole kind of thing I'm in could we figure out fake passports and all that stuff you would I'm thinking about getting a eu passport Oh, yeah, I'm thinking about getting a german passport so you can slip over just in case I can fucking I got a couple associates that have multiple passports case the shit goes down, huh? Yeah Well, you can also go to countries certain countries. I believe I think with an eu pass where you go to cuba cuba. We can go to cuba now americans. I think they shut it back down What the fuck really what are we doing?

And it was only only you can only go there was only like eight people that could go Eight it was like journalists. No, it was like eight categories of people I knew a bunch of dirtbags that went and hung out for a couple of weeks over there Said it was awesome Uh, no, you can't go just to hang you have to have a there's eight reasons. Yeah, it's like journalist education medicine Uh, pornography religious activities, pina coladas religious activity. There you go. I'm going to church I'm a catholic for god's sakes. I think it's like more of a mission Oh, fuck that

Unless you do a bad boys two style roll in covert ops blow up the building come in Remote control cars with bombs. See you do it that way Oh, I was thinking more like fast and furious six. I didn't see that one. I tapped out after two How about hopping on a jet blue flight out of miami? All right, let's do it. Let's do it like that Puddle jumper like that. All right, let's get back on track here. It's from whack my wee wee $20 Yeah, can we get serious here? How y'all feel about putting ice and orange juice? I'm a big fan first couple of sips good because it's cold and it's not watered down It needs what here's the thing orange juice needs to be watered down a little bit

I got a curveball for you. You're nuts with that orange juice and ice With a little bit of club soda boom making homemade orange jena Which might be my favorite beverage the orange jena very ever rated. You have one really I I exercise self-control. I don't know how you do. Yeah, everything. I have self-control H. Holy. That's a good thing. Yeah Yeah, try to stay away from uh, I'm all right. I think it just waters it down too quick But I do like a nice cold. It's like I like the thickness. I like the I like it buddy. You're preaching to the choir. I love an oj a fresh squeeze oj I can't do the fresh squeeze. They don't do them that much in new york anymore

But I mean new york has gone downhill with the delis and the diners so so much over the last 15 years But back in the day when I lived up to the first time when I was banging on the upper east side There was there was unbelievable delis A bodega's on every corner and they would have the things outside They were always in the corner and they went around and they had the fruit They had the flowers. They had a guy out there and every morning They would put out these little like bangers of fresh squeeze orange juice with the with the with the orange tops Sure, they'd be packed in ice. Oh

And grab one of those So good So so good. Yeah, but you were yelling at me for drinking one a couple weeks ago at the airport because they're no good for you It's all sugar. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Your body can't process the sugar I believe it's that needs the fiber Everybody says that my body can process anything. That's my problem Have you looked at your body? This is fat court. Have you looked at your body? It can process it though

I could need a license plate and get it in me I guess if that's your definition of process. Sure. Yeah Sure, sure, sure. Six teaspoons of sugar and a glass of orange juice. Yeah God, I remember as a kid adding sugar to it As a little kid we had this little tiny uh It looked like a little coal bin But you know, like those little cute little things a little coal bin

Like a little like a like something like a little coal bucket that had like a little spoon You know, they had those little cute little things you put sugar or butter in or whatever. Coke. Yeah, yeah Coke. Yeah, you could right now. We have a little like a little dingy that has a little paddle and the paddle is the spoon Adorable. Yeah, sugar dish. You sugar dish. Yeah Um Yeah, I used to put put sugar in it Well, really you're like a human onion, you know You smell like shit and I don't like it. Make me cry

Uh, all right, let's see here. This is from clock ten dollar homie here Is it garbage to ask the bartender or wedding to use their tip jar for change from a $20 bill? Yeah, you can't go into the tip jar Yeah, people do people people step over that line so so much Yeah, stick your hand in the fucking tip jar. What's wrong with you? I get also if you're there Tip them with hit the hit them with the 20 and then you're good. Make sure you make the whoo-hoo Call attention to it if you have to make eye contact as that 20 enters and then you're good all night The wedding we went to yeah last weekend. I went full Chrissy D

route I did everything Chrissy D said The envelope was fat And when I got in there, I had a hundo walked up to the lady to bar. I was like, I'm gonna give this to you now Here's a hundie Amazing service all night Even when I switch when when they switch bars from the cocktail hour To inside the where the reception was she was there and I went to put another 20 She's like, no, no, my god. You don't have to do that. I put the 20 in there

I didn't get that once I dunked about I dunked the hundo on it all night and you got you got to let her know I was like, what's your name? I did I was going. Hey, whoo-hoo. Hey debora Becky Dubski right here. I said, well, I good with the seven ounce scores life by the way. I gotta say Hey, we're fucking see you in three minutes. Jesus cry was ordered two at a time We're thimbles of beer. She was squeezing the lime in for me and stirring my uh Uh Tequila and sodies

I don't like to straw and I don't like having the lemon rind in there. She was doing herself. It's good Stirring it. There you go. You got to take care of we got to take care of bartenders there. You got to Could you get jammed up? There's like a you know, 200 300 people all going at one or two bars A lot which they did a good job. It was never a wait at the bar. The food was delicious The steak was good. Yeah really came together. Um All right, this one's from the one and only Philly tea $20 piece of trash here. There you go first time question Appreciate uh, is a garbage address in your old dirty construction clothing while unemployed So when you go to the liquor store when it opens at 8 a.m. You can pretend that you just got off the night shift

I respect it. I respect I gotta say the thought level of that is I would love for you to be like, whoo Long night, you know what I mean? Sprint some water in your face. Yeah What time is I got to get the kids off the school what something These nights are killing me say that from the aisle Pretty soon. I'll be on day shift Just put in my time, you know, but I think I would do With that is I would change my profession. I wouldn't I would go doctor or something like that

Go in there with a doctor goes in with a lamp in the stethoscope Pocket full of cotton balls and tongue depressants that's what I'd be doing, man. No, no one does that Changing profession every couple of weeks. I think I'm gonna be a writer this week the village people I'm an indian chief Go in there as a cowboy one day. How are you? Uh, I like that's a good time. Uh, this one's Aaron. This one's like a bit of a oxymoron, I think is the word Is a garbage as a kid your dad would take you to free art galleries and tell you to fill up on the hors d'oeuvres because that's dinner

Man, but trashy move but arc multiple art galleries. That's classy. It is I mean, I've never I don't think I've ever been to an art gallery. That's a decepticon type of trash those kind of dads My dad wouldn't know he wouldn't know where an art gallery was if it if it landed on the house Oh, dude, I remember my buddy's my buddy's family went to like a french restaurant And I told my dad the eye roll could be felt like even even a french restaurant. He's like, okay Displate baby metal posters pull this in the biz. What are they gonna think of next remember when you're a little kid?

You'd kill for something like that. I know now the technology is caught up We're living in the future you can get on display and you get something cool like this They got cool gaming stuff. They got movies. They got cartoons and they got those licensing deals with the big dogs Star Wars netflix whatever you're into they got you covered. It's like the literally millions of cool. Does you go on there? It's like the god damn encyclopedia. It's fantastic Uh, they were nice enough to send us we got one and we got one hanging over by t-bone Uh, they're awesome. They're cool. They're easy peasy that go up. They're sturdy sturdy. Just pop baby They look different. You know walking you don't see four thumbtacks hanging up a ripped piece of paper

Classy class it up a little bit. We were also still dirtbags Because it's movie references, you know what I mean tv shows. That's why we're not hanging up a Picasso. You know what I mean Of course, uh, click the link in our lady I know click the link in our description to see some of your favorite displays and save up to 29 Get 25 off when you buy one or two and 29 when you buy three or more. Holy crap. They're giving them away Discounts will automatically be applied to your car when you click the link or use the code garbage when you visit display.com That's display.com code garbage or click the link in our show notes. Do it. Yep. Yeah, but let's talk about ladder baby Ladder let's talk about taking care of the family god forbid something happens and it always does

You don't want to put this off you put off going to the dentist you put off going to the dmv You put off getting a haircut not this baby get yourself some term life insurance today No doctors no needles get up to three million dollars in coverage. You don't got to see anybody you do it all online It's absolutely fantastic and you go to bed at night with the peace of mind that you love ones are taken care of Yeah, gang. Don't be a bozo get squared away early on It's just a few minutes on a phone or a laptop to apply Ladder smart out algorithms work in real time So you choose and find out if you're instantly approved

No hidden fees you can cancel at any time get a full refund if you change your mind in 30 days because they're good people over there at ladder Ladder policies are issued by insurers with long proven histories of pain claims They're rated a and a plus by am's best. That's a lot of a do it Finally since life insurance cost Uh more as you age now is the time to cross it off your list. So go to ladderlife.com slash garbage today to see if you're instantly approved That's ladder ladder life.com slash garbage ladder life.com slash garbage do it now back to that goddamn show back to the show We ended up in a poetry reading one time on a friday night. I can't remember who's it was

As a family. Yeah, it was like a cousins or something like that. Not a cousin or like a friend of my my mom's or something Oh, no. Oh, man We were dying laughing on the way home Just ripping this lady's life apart Doing the poems and stuff. Yikes. That's a tough look Yeah, I don't think I've ever been but I get that. However, I can't say this Again, not to bring the wedding up again, but the orderds at the wedding were phenomenal I could do just ordervs for dinner

Sure Like a tray of those puff whatever they are and some scallops some bacon wrap scallops I'm missing that so I could see that this way and should be nice. It's pretty good Um All right, let's see here $10 homie wendy Is it garbage to have collector plates on a non-collector car example of 2002 honda accord? Oh and it says collect like I guess yeah

How do you how do you love to do that? I don't think you are I'm assuming because that's got to be like registered and stuff, right? Yeah, although antique it would say Okay, yeah antique or collector historical. I think is one as well. I think it depends on the state to be honest with you huh, um because we have My family's got a couple of dealer plates Yeah, we do what yeah throw a dealer plate on it It's got magnets on it so you can stick it on any car really

Huffy believes in no time Let's go Right in your um, maraca with pennsylvania dealer tax I'm in my Chevy lumina go around. I'm right. I'm riding on two wheels like they do in dubeye Oh man The feds would find you in three seconds Yeah, no, I'd have the full garb. I would I would love that. I would really I would love to have people. Hey, I mean, I think people are after me anyway

If you really set them off, I'll be good But yeah, we got dealer plates, which which How do you score them? You have to be registered as a dealer I'm a dealer like a weed dealer When did your family own a car dealer? They did it obviously Yeah Um selling a car on the lawn. Yeah

Uh Yeah, you're throwing one of those uh dollar bill wind tunnels get a couple of hot dogs on a donut tray It might as well be a used car lot. Sure. Yeah. That's pretty good. So we got that if we're ever in a jam Nice, we can you know, we gotta go down there down where we gotta go down and get it from the piece overnight express I don't know if I'm waiting for the ups man. I'm hot tailing it out of here Dude, she jacked she jacked compass me the other day or not the other day a couple months I needed something overnighted

And I call her I'm like, hey, I didn't get it yet. And she's like, it'll be there Tuesday The overnight was 52 dollars And the two days certified was only 14.99. I'm like, I'll pay you back the money. They're on a different level Yeah, they're on it. They're thinking on the different levels They don't realize I needed it now. I don't care what it costs You know, a lot of people are doing now. They sell these uh, we're gonna be poor forever They're taping uh leaves to their to the yeah to the to the license plate. Mm-hmm pretty sweet move I had my buddy, uh, they're a bit uh

My buddy and his brother a little hippy-dippy guys have an easy pass first came out They were going on a road trip from like they were like going rock climbing and like Fucking, you know, Maine or something all the way up there. So they had to drive to like a bunch of states So anytime an easy pass is coming they'll pull over and just put a t-shirt a t-shirt there Like tape a t-shirt drive through for a mile or two get out take it off. Yeah Pretty good. I was like, I guess yeah, they're gonna, you know, this is way back Because there was no real fucking way of catching either, you know That'll send the state trooper over by the way

Forgot about that had a little run with a state trooper out there in Niagara Falls New York statey, I believe I don't know what he was. We didn't talk a lot. I fucking pulled you over on a horse Try to chase you Gonna have that angle of pursuit really down pat got to close in on an angle like a d-back That's pretty yeah, I got hemmed up I was doing 80 in a 55 Are you Sammy Hagar? What the hell? That's crazy. Yeah

Well, you know You might be driving next road trip. I might have got 18 points on my license and that one fair enough Um, save that for the page. I want to hear all about that. Of course. Um, all right. Let's see This one we've talked about a long time ago But a lot of people they like upvoted themselves or comment on it. So, you know, I wanted to bring it back to light This was from alex Fresh $10 homie. Have you ever pulled an empty popcorn bucket out of the trash at the movie theater and taken it up the concession stand for a free refill? I didn't even know they did free refill. They do on the largest largest of everything. You can get a free refill

Okay, well, so does it mostly self dispensing now. No That mostly got this nine that not everywhere and I gotta tell you can I sit can I say this? No, can I say this? That coke machine The self-dispense one Sucks. I don't know what it is. It's not great And if they don't have regular cherry coke as one of the buttons and they just have regular coke And then they have the the the little circles underneath where you can pick. It's not the same juice It's not the same syrup. It they're not that same mix. Yeah, it's not good. Toby back me up on this

The cocoa freestyle machine suck ass. I agree. Yeah, I agree. You know where we were they're doing too much Where did we stop we were in where the fuck were we were in kentucky or somewhere driving up from nashville to indy and one of the stops where we got where I got you the Soda that was all right, dude. That had oh I was like a fucking brewery with the amount of spouts It was like a 30 fucking individual that was polar pop polar pop. Yeah, that was that was free refills, too Those animals were pulling up. Oh, remember that. Yeah, the lady was walking out holding them like that six cups It was a you buy the cup for a month Free refills and they were coming out of the woodwork 6.99 for a month of sodas. So sure

um Yeah, and then also I had one In a styrofoam cup from the waffle house to go. Remember kasey b ran over that. I was in a styrofoam cup, too That diet coke Yeah, that's all right. It's like the original formula they used it was fantastic. It's all right It's pretty war. They've at the movies. They've backed away a little bit with the remember when it used to be wax that covered the cup The cups used to be covered in wax sure that way they were awesome that styrofoam 100 percent But what they're doing now it's stupid

The popcorn's still pretty good. I'll give you a heads up your ass as you believe that you gotta do something Do you see that trick? Do you put the butter on with the straw? Yeah, get down to the bottom You're not gonna believe this. You don't like the butter. I'm not that big a fan of that butter plus. It's all over you Yeah, it's all over you. And I just I can't go for it Yeah, you like leaving room for all your other food to get all over you Well, yeah, I got my m&m's that I'm gonna put in the popcorn as I eat it on top And then I usually have that kind of serves as the moisture of or like the The topping for the popcorn

You know if I had if I if there was a real butter option, I would coat it real butter. No, it's not hitting I would drown it in that if it was real butter, but I whatever that is I'm not feeling it. How do you guys feel about the snow cap? Only ever see him at the movie theater big fan. All right. Yeah I remember I definitely go through phases where I get they hit me up. I get a box that like hits me real nice They're always out around Christmas somewhere like an aunt's house Well, it's that is a small version of what's referred to as a non pre-l Which a larger one of the big one the big those are like a it's like a half

It's like a quarter size. Yeah, those things my uncle Mike love them They have those in a lot of like the loose candy places Yeah, they do candy by the time those come in a gift bag and a gift bag for like the hollow or like a gift basket for the holidays Joe aunt's nut house used to have the member Joe. It's not house of the mall. No ours was we're not all nuts And I think it's still open shout out that we're not all nuts and rich bro, Pennsylvania I got a question for you fellas. I'm listening. Hey Toby as a kid Were you ever allowed to get the can the loose candy in the grocery store with the scoop? Yeah, that's what we're talking about that didn't come out until they redid in the grocery store

That came out They redid our groceries were probably when I was in like junior high or like late. I love that came out Uh, yeah, I would just like go grab if I was in my dad I we could just take a couple handfuls for the walk, you know what I mean? We weren't checking out with it Uh, just a little taste. They'll do you that might as well have been gold bullion in my family I don't know why you think that it's like you're not paying for the packaging It's in bulk. They do that in Europe a lot there from the week that I was there. They did a lot in France for the week You were in that one city

They did it at the movies in paris It was all haribo stuff Top shelf shout out the haribo, but it was in a cone. It was in like a plastic cone was weird Man a kooky over there. I don't know. I know what they're doing with the candy. I could pay it out We weren't allowed to there was one place called snacks by the pound that we were allowed to go in there Who's also your nickname? We go in there and hit that pretty hard that's where I fell in love with the um The coca-cola bottles the haribo coca-cola bottles

man It it it doesn't give you quite enough to satisfy you so you just keep going. They are something else Something else I tell you. All right. All right moving on. He's fucking chubbing up over here in both instances Uh, this one's from Matthew ever use rubber made container instead of a suitcase Yikes When I moved out onto my own I got my no not moved out on my own when I got mine I moved out So I moved up here to my buddy's house. Shout out guge

I moved up to guge's apartments up on his floor for a while And then a bed and then a floor it was a whole whole scene but when I moved out of there I moved in when I moved up sleeping in the kitchen at one point You were kind of I don't know why you're trying to defame me in front of our listeners. Oh, what do you mean? No, my I slept on a kitchen floor and an air mattress for six months. You know that I was joking. Um, No, I was based out of the kitchen Because I was kind of my my my my you know forward operating base It was a tight railroad kitchen at the end of it

It had like a breakfast no, which was pretty nice. It was like a nice bench Sure It for not for sleeping you were sleeping like a half moon all the time. No, yeah I so I kept my clothes in there Because when you lost the weight, that's where I went and got the clothes when you gave me your old clothes Yeah, so when I first lost all the weight you came up and Cleaned you out. You were poor. Oh, yeah as a motherfucker. I needed those Yeah, yeah

Hemmed up. I told you the I'd be like fuck. I gave you I remember a pair of slacks and stuff I told you the other day. I think I texted you when I was on my way to uh, JFK I said, do you remember I said, do you remember when I walked home when I did the laughing skull festival? And I walked home from LaGuardia because I didn't have bust money. You heard that right? He walked like on the on ramp like he walked with the cars I walked down the grand central grand central parkway or a great grand central parkway. I walked down that And had to like figure out how to get up the retaining wall or whatever

I thought it'd be like 15 minutes. It took me four hours I dude, I'm swear to god took me four hours That's also you flew without a light without without photo ID for some reason. Yeah I flew down there with a wrinkled up, uh Social security card and a um A credit card that I don't think was mine Why would I have a credit card?

No, it was my social security insurance card or something. Yeah, I was my insured insurance card. Yeah, it was my expired health insurance card I think you're all right Um, all right, let's see Shout out to the bozos and the homies. Um, this one's from big j doperson homerun's name. That's great This just says living directly next to a gas station question mark As a young man, it's convenient. We live next to one at the titan house. Yeah We're all over there and get some snacks. All right, but we didn't have a we didn't have a straight shot There was a fence

It's where to go out We had to walk like a block to get there Take your life in your hands, too But if you're there running running low on burnies whatever what it was fucking or if you're leaving for the night Hit the gas station grab the burnies for the or you're coming home Stop and grab some doritos a die coke a gatorade for the morning. Whatever it was It was all right. We would walk from there too. We were we we would that we would We would leave out of there into the city walking. I walked it every day to work or take the bus. Yeah

I walked every day to and from work. Um Yeah, it It's not a lot That's a lot for philly Because if Philly's not like a really walking city, you know, they're delivered in new york I mean, it's like it's probably like 15 blocks. It was like a yeah 15 minute walk It ain't nothing crazy down brode street there Um, shout out that we lived at broad and worton

Luke oil, I believe it was no broad and tight No, Titan doesn't intersect with broad. Oh, we did live a broad award the intersection was that part of I'll be giving up our old addresses either the titan straight house that turned into a comedy a philly comedy I don't think there's any more the bees are living the bees live there. Uh A couple other people Del Colo, maybe I thought the mayor lived there. I don't know a lot of people did keen cob It was keen cob Shout out to the boys

Philly doing all right, not an on time rent payment in 10 years. Oh, man. That was poor bastard. I wonder who is the sucker on that lease Oh, it was me for a while with you in the basement Because me and or me reggie and cotton lived at a place in uh in uh sunset park and another comedian friend of ours Was on the lease Yikes, if he was a real friend, he would have paid on time and I drug him through the courts You'll get it when we got it And we don't have it. Yeah, you're like splitting a big potato to three of us Uh

I just want some chris $10 homie here and everyone read is it garbage or go to rehab with your dad? Both go kick it Yeah That's tough booze I kind of get if you're like if you're like a big booze and you're like, hey, let's tighten this up together I I can get that. Yeah, if you're doing hard drugs With your dad Bad luck, but people have been there. Of course. I'm not judging. I've definitely drug done drugs with people's parents For sure was never big on the drugs, but yeah, I mean

sure I did ketamine with my friend's dad in the back seat of a mercury sable Shit Shout out to columbus olio talking about ripping lines like a gentleman Yeah, maybe a bump of meth a weekend warrior something Doing kitty in the back of the mercury That's a two-seater two is that that's a two door No, I think it's a four door, but I think it's one of the ones where the seat goes up

Oh, it was that's a two door. Oh two door. Yeah. Yeah. It was a climber. Yeah, car. Oh those cars suck Why were you in the back seat with them? They were jerking each other off. What do you mean? I'm not gonna jerk a guy off at a passenger seat. Was it his car? No, it sure wasn't I don't know whose it was. Yeah, no one in that dude No one in that story has a driver's license let alone an insured vehicle Wow Uh, all right here. Let's see. This is from emmerich, uh, 20 homey Uh lifelong bozo is a garbage have more than one shirt with the county you live in

On it. I have multiple delco shirts. Delco. I'll give you Because we're all Philly dirtbags. I respect delcos famous Delco is kind of it's like orange county. Yeah. Delco is kind of famous. Uh, or at least, you know notoriety I mean, I'll it's always sunny. I think it has a bunch of or like to go to delco one time or something. It's Uh, delco proper shout out to our boys and keep her and uh, tommy pove and butterly and the whole gang So delco definitely has some Clout some clout that's the word Did you see by the way? I don't know if we talked about it

Uh, he's the bat star at one of the guys took the lady to wildwood Really took her to the boardwalk down there. I they didn't even fucking call to consult me tell me they're operating my backyard I'm the motherfucking king of the boards daddy. Oh, they go to sam's at least come and kiss the ring Uh, no, I don't know. I didn't want to just saw a clip and then everybody started tagging me. He's like you believe this shit He didn't win I think I voted off right then on morris pier Garry she doesn't want you anymore Uh, all right, let's bank through a couple of mo here. Let's give we got a lot of first timers

So let's get those first timers out the whiz There you go. Um This one. I'm not even sure this is for matt $10 homie is it garbage to bar your front and back door shut with old shower rods So we are safe. No, I'm all about it. I guess the doors don't lock because I asked you that question a couple weeks ago I said, do you ever slept with it with a Uh, a chair up against the door. Yeah, never said chair But I remember we I've done like stuff around the windows and stuff like that for sure

I'm all about that the foley houses like that. Yeah, that has Security measures we'll say Crazies like home alone too. Yeah You know what I'm a big fan of the rod in the windows in the window The the like the window slides that way put a little metal rod in there and in the little in the yep I forget I forgot what house it was One of my dad's one of the houses I was in with my dad The sliding back door to get onto the patio. We used a fucking hockey stick. Yeah. Yeah, that's all right

The blade off it was like one of those cheap wooden ones took the blade off fucking hacks all of it down Took the front gate of a castle Yeah, shut that down. Yeah, you put the stick in Oh, yeah, put the bar down is what what they would say at my home. I brought a hit each other with it and shit Oh, yeah, put the bar down and shut up. Uh-huh and close the curtains Nobody peeking in put your valuables in your asshole go to bed Like a normal person They don't do it anymore, but when I was a kid the value that the

The family whatever jewels for lack of a better word they they the heirlooms. Yeah, they they move are you inheriting anything? like of Value you think uh, I like it. Did it is Did your did your parents estate have any commemorative plates coins jewels? Well, you know going up in value. Yeah, my my my dad passed a few weeks ago as you know And uh, yeah, and um, whoa, I have uh, 50 percent of a railroad and I don't got fucking anything Just hit the camera. Yeah, so an idiot Might inherit anything. No, obviously. I know not of money. I guess I get 15 minutes in the garage

Let's grab what you can and keep it moving tar all over your body patty says otherwise it's getting thrown out No, I just meant like get rid of it. Is there any I get a set of earrings like there's some there's something of significant That your mom had a necklace. Uh, doesn't she see I know she has some set of 9 11 earrings or something She's got she's got some sort of national tragedy jewelry I didn't mean money. I know I know you guys are poor poor bastards nine 11 earrings. Doesn't she you saw the ring What ring by the ring that I had this weekend. That was my dad's ring

We each got one of my dad's rings Do you had one of your by the way it barely fit on your pinky nail? Yeah, it was uh, that was a tight squeeze. I'm a larger man But he was a bigger guy too, but it's from younger his younger days. I preserve now He wore it up and he wore it on his uh, he got it on there. Yeah Yeah Good. Yeah, I'm a fat piece of shit. I'm not. Hey, I didn't say that. I just said yeah just that Okay, there's a Monica for my grandfathers, but it doesn't really work

It's out of tune real attitude Every time I played the deer come up to the backyard Bunch of mailord start circling the house The dog shits himself I don't think we have I retire my play blues traveler. Well, we never had anything of significant No, there's uh, there's some waterford crystal. I think she got when she got married to my dad Everybody has that. Yeah, I don't think there's anything of actual significance. Nothing like that nothing

Yeah, no shore house. No, nothing like that. I'll get the shore house. There you go I'll have to fight my brother in court for that'll be a knocked out drag out battle I can't wait till we all see each other in whatever court Look at atlantic county court. Kate made county courthouse. I've been in there before Hammed up, um No, I got nothing you got anything like that your family I could see that I could see your mom having I mean like more air looming like oh, they do have a painting or a whatever or something pretty nice martini shaker There you go. It's bedazzled

I've only been used 8,000 times The inside's all worn away No, I'm sure your mom's a classy lady. I'm sure she has some some painting some artwork some furniture stuff like that You know what she has she has a giant julia child jackpapin poster autographed. That's pretty sweet That's not bad. I wonder what that goes for. Yeah, I wonder how much that original cookbook goes the the original julia child's cookbook I don't know. We might I always confuse her with julia roberts Not even joking. I gotta do like that that equation in my head. She wasn't a pretty woman. Can I get there? Shout out to julia childs

I love during oceans 13 Our husband was in the come work for the company supposedly Work for the oss world war two May or may not have been uh associated with certain organization Virginia, okay May but their operation Yeah, I think you have an insider scoop on this. Why are you whispering to hundreds of thousands of people? Don't tell anybody but I think I'm an idiot

I thought julia and julia The movie tucci was in it that meryl straight man. She's something else in that. She's great. You ever see that julia and julia? Good movie Saw kramer versus kramer. So did I we watch that in health class. We were talking about the wars That's the first time I saw a set of knockers when he was nailing that broad. I don't remember. They didn't show us that part Yeah, uh, dustin hoffman sort of banging some chick and the kid came out in the middle of the night She was walking on the hallway buck naked the first time I saw a naked woman Hot che macha I never looked I can't push it for my dad to get a divorce after that

Let me get the voice bring some broads over here Spruce to place up a little bit, huh, will you With my beak, huh? What's it deal? Two christmas isn't too nice What's your what was the second two christmas isn't two nice sets of titties Really good We start breastfeeding again, huh? Mama

It's a classy program here and I get off the do is Now back to loot in our parents house I don't think I don't think there's anything of value in my parents house I'll tell you this is pretty trashy tvs from like 2022 you might know or 2002 dude our tv downstairs legit is pre 9 11 And it works like it's 9 11 tv. Yeah, I don't I don't know how it works, but it works It they must have put smart technology in this back in the like way back in the day

Anticipating the day that all this stuff would come together because you can get uh sleeper cell tv Sitting around waiting to be activated like the god damn manchurian candidate. I'm never going to that house again transforms in the middle of the night stabs us No, you because you could get netflix and stuff on it and you shouldn't I'll tell you things would have gone different at that tv had been on that plane We're not going anywhere I got netflix Uh, we do this which is pretty trashy Um, which you might know is we have a set of foley estate wine glasses. I saw yeah

That's in that's yeah, I feel like we're talking the patreon heavy, but that's a those are the those are the good wine glasses Yeah, they're the good wine. I don't even think we have good ours are the ours is like the metine the martini shaker It's like they're getting no cycling through quickly and they break a lot at We have a lot of stuff We have a lot of stuff in the house that the foley name is on that we are not affiliated with yeah, that's trashy. Yeah Yeah Yeah, and if we drive by a place that says foley's we're all getting out of the car and taking a picture Sure. Yeah, yeah

Um, anybody else we own three bars and uh In county cork Is sheep farm ours I I would tell you uh, it's not trashy We are so it was when my mom my mom got remarried and my dad my stepdad moved into the house They were together for a long time before but it was like, you know, this official like my mom changed her name um And to kelly was there you know her new married name So they got embroidered tap embroidered hand towels for the powder room with k on them for kelly

and We're so dumb Me my brother and my sister all thought it was for kevin The k like we didn't realize you put your last name on hand towels like that's what rich people do so My brother this is fucking bullshit. He's got towels with his initials on them Let me get a hoodie it almost created world war three dude my mom's like it's our last It's my new last name. We're like, okay

I always thought we never never had anything like that when I was a kid This was though, but this was too. I mean this was probably 2005. We would maybe have a uh an outdoor mat That would say patty and terry or something like that That's to us was like we had where I don't even know where to get those made Our cousin made them one year Because she was doing like just the whole piece of the car She was doing like painting and she made them as like one of the family christmas gifts But going over to people's houses two things the embroidered

um Hand towels and stuff like that like nice nice white fluffy towels Well, we only had them in the powder room on the first floor in case people come over to look classy We were using fucking shop, you know, we were using shop rags and fucking gojo handja Hang orange hand cleaner like we were goddamn mechanics washing your hair with lava At 11 years old that pumice getting in your eyes. God damn it. I love that stuff Nothing reminds you of a hard day of work of fucking cleaning your hands off with that shit Hands would be cracking

But you know the white and blue the white tote bag with the blue bottom. Yeah That would have like a k or f on it. Yeah It would never be the first middle initial and Man when I was a kid I was like some day I still look at those. I think that the brand that they are is very expensive. It is I don't know what it is That was always in the back of like a nice Like a Mercedes Benz like some rich chick that you want all these rich rich girls had them. Yeah And I'm like where you just got money laying around to do that. Yeah

Crazy crazy. I remember one time I found out my buddy My buddy's family was getting their dry cleaning dropped off Picked up and dropped off Like in the burbs delivered because I walked up and there's a bag of clothes on the front door And I walked like I walked into the house. I'm like, yo, it's a bag of fucking dirty homeless guy. Yeah And I kind of put that that's the dry cleaners coming to pick that up. I was like, okay I'm gonna see myself out. I don't belong here no more Yeah

Real new money. I felt like a fucking idiot I didn't even know that was possible in the burbs Took a lot to use the dry cleaners at my house. My dad would have to give his uniforms Uh dry clean, you know, my dad would dry clean not even fucking around his jeans jeans shorts crazy Go get a mean crease put in them Straight down butter with those. Yeah his jeans and his jeans shorts. Go. I gotta go pick up my jeans I gotta go pick up my shorts. I can come out Because they were like a fucking they were like a there was like four pair of you know, I went for I would say

1988 501 Levi's Like the original four pair like they were the first four pairs ever come off the line Cramped up real nice when my uncle passed away. I got a majority of his clothes And he had he was he was a businessman He had so many button-down shirts that I wore But the first time that I wore them was brutal because he would they were all dry clean. I got like from the dry cleaner heavy starch

Dude, I remember wearing them and like I would have like cuts on my neck after wearing them for a couple hours You turn your head. You almost slit your carotid artery. Yeah Dude need a couple a couple of fabric softers loosen those It's up a little bit. I don't want to fucking fluff cycle. Will you daddy? I got a hot date tonight Uh, we gotta wrap it up gang gang. We love you. We love you. Come out and see us on the road there Uh, a couple of things coming up. It's gonna be really fun couple things coming up Atlanta by this point might be sold out charlotte still has some tickets left get those if you're in the north caroline I think that's on the border, right?

Yeah, if like that's north carolina south carolina ish or wherever come see us in charlotte pick up tickets to that second Boston show at it That's gonna that might even be gone by the time this comes out and providence Should have some tickets left pick those tickets up Philly sold out The card game is on sale as you hear this get those while supplies last We're doing one last run of the original deck of cards this bad boy right here. Toby hit me. It's like over I think it's like 53 or 52 of our favorite original questions of the fucking of a yg

So that'll we're doing one last one of them get those as well Fouls on insta the whole nine yards check out the chip the clip channel new guy luke is out there banging away On the clip channel do it all baby activate the are you garbage activating? Are you garbage army? We love you. We'll see you next week