Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Style Stealers - HARD FEELINGS PRVIEW

Episode Date: March 2, 2022

Hard Feelings - you want em, we got em!  PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage  Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AreYouGarbage

Welcome back to another exciting episode of them hard motherfucking feelings. You want to we got him? I'm a. I mean, oh, man, through a wrench in the mix. Big man, the first of all, the big man's on his own planet, dumb today. And you know it. You came in, you don't know who I am. Yes, Toby's name.

You went into the wrong. You went into the wrong building. Who knows what's happened. I'm a little foggy. I'm not going to lie to you. I think the big man was having a couple of fucking grandpa's old golf medicine last night. I had some spirits, one of it. Kevin, James, Ryan is here.

Hey, gang, thanks for tuning in. You're the fucking homies. You're both those in my heart, but you're also homies. You know that we love you. Thank you so fucking much. That patreon is cooking. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you enough, gang. I can't thank you enough.

It's fucking awesome to see the army of garbage. I fucking love. We got so many nice messages too about, you know, from the patrons. It's cool. Absolutely fantastic. Is the cat out of the bag about the other thing? What's the other thing about the next goal? Yes, we can talk about it on this here episode.

Excellent. Shout out to the bozo himself. Toby Mcscruffens. What's up? Before we do that, I have hard feelings with H Foley. Why do you? Wait a second. Hold on.

Let me clear my docket. Dink, dink, dink, dink, dink, dink, dink, dink. Sally, hold my balls. Clear my 330. What's your fucking problem? I'm sitting in a goddamn broken chair that your fat has broke. The old switcheroo. Fair, fair point.

Classic fat guy move. Fat guy 101 right there. You know, it's the fat guy killer. You know those plastic. Heart disease. You know, it's, you know, those outdoor. The plant, they're like three bucks at the hardware store. The solid one piece plastic.

Don't sit on that at an incline. You're fucking going for a ride. That's one of my favorite Jackass bits. Did you just kick the back leg? Yeah, you can just run up and kick that back leg and it snaps right off. By the way, even though Bam's not in it, I saw the trailer for Jackass.

So want to go see that in the movie theater. Oh, I'm going. That's something you see. That's a team building. We should go do that. Oh, that sounds fun. Do you see they have like the burrito truck or whatever and it punches them in the face?

And they're like, nah, seriously, just go get them a cup of coffee and it punches them in the nuts. I mean, they can't. That's comedy gold. Yeah. I feel like Jackass was the last thing that brought people together because I remember when that first came out, dad's kid's son's mom's.

I mean, that's insane. That's an insane statement. It's the last thing they really brought up. That's what I deal with is an insane statement. That really brought the America together. Let me tell you, pop-ups, nannies, little babies love that shit. All right, fuck you guys then.

You'll see it myself, dickhead. I just said we should get it. I don't know nothing about that chair. It should be a team-building event. And what's up with that hoodie? Wouldn't you got to get ET back to the ship, huh? What the fuck is this kid over here? No one deflects like H-Fall.

We're making fun of blue blank plain hoodies now. Is that what we're going to have to get the heat off you? Hey, look at you with your fucking eyeballs over there. You believe this guy? You're about to start delivering the Herald. Paperboy? Folks, we'll be right back. First of all, you came in here with a style.

You're a fucking style, Scooper. You are. He's got a black fucking, a black jean jacket. Oh yeah. Which on the record is a kip. That's a kip-a-rino. Yeah, I've realized, or I've come to the conclusion. You want to be me.

The Herschel, the black. I've come to the conclusion. Ha ha ha ha ha. Listen, what are we doing here? Who's biting Steve's over here? Listen, this is the conclusion I've come to. You started this war when you ripped off Toby's sunglasses. First.

We've been over this many times. Smart move leading off with my sunglasses to get me on his team. Listen, all the old treaties are null and void. I'm not respecting anything. It's every man for himself. Is that the new rule? I'm going to start tweezing out my hair.

OK. No, but I did think of this. What? Next Halloween. Do we do a Halloween episode? I don't know if we did or not. I think we might have talked about it. I'm sure we talked about trick or treating or something.

We didn't do it like Christmas where we decorate everything. Yeah, well, we could do outfits. Well, next year we should go with each other. I love it. And really go all out. I love it. Like get my makeup people in here. OK.

Could be fun. Yeah, I love it, man. Get you a fat suit. Maybe not by then. I don't know. Maybe I meet in the middle. You might have to lose a couple of Benjamin Buttons this thing.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Kippy is foley, foley is kippy. Now, back to the fucking hard feelings. Yeah. What was your beef? You broke this chair and then swapped it. You broke your chair and then swapped my chair with your chair. This is obvious to what's happening.

Toby's clearly lying, ladies and gentlemen. Toby is clearly high on drugs right now. Now, speaking of high on drugs. I'm age 40. Nice to meet you. I'm so high I'm not even going to defend this accusation. I'm just going to completely change subjects like a psychopath. That's kind of what I do.

Hold on. So all treaties are off the table. Everything's null and void. Everything's fair game. Everything's fair game. OK. What are you going to do? I'm just asking.

So when I can throw that in your face next time you try to fucking, hey, I'm the blue jeans guy. I mean, the shit you guys are staking claim to is insane, by the way. I think you've claimed any sort of jewelry. And no necklaces. You fucking. I already own a necklace.

You screwed me on the watch. Screwed you. What do you mean? So you're the only guy who's allowed to wear a watch? Yes. OK. OK. No, not anymore.

Do whatever you want. Yeah, of course not anymore. What are you talking about? Let's see how ugly this can get. OK. What was the name of those shirts? Tony Braxton's. What were you wearing?

What was her hitch? I want to talk about this. OK. OK. So for the folks out there. I got a little hard feelings with you, by the way. Me? Uh-huh.

Go ahead. No. I'll take the one two punch guy and the sons of bitches. Is this a game we're playing? I'll play it all night long. What? Couple nights ago, we went out for our Christmas dinner for our company, a little dinner here.

Me, T-Bone. A little team din din. A little team din din. Me, the bald guy, T-Bone McScruffins, new guy, Luke. NGO. Try to enjoy my meal. But I can't. And why can't I?

Because there's all talk about what crazy stunt we're going to pull for the next fucking Patreon milestone. Yes. And what did we settle on, Kevin? What did we settle on? A one time, O-T-O-T-O, one time, one time only. $10,000 roulette spin bet on Black, baby. In Atlantic City.

In Atlantic City. And how did we get there? Because we were kicking around ideas, maybe some gambling, something. And new guy, Luke, goes, we should do the entourage bet. Where do they walk in? They put $10,000 on Black first go every time they hit AC. Which we were like, love it.

Let's do it. I was about five or six main hands in here at this point. So I signed off on it, because first of all, I like the action. You know what I mean? Sign me up. Action Jackson over here. Well, here's the thing.

Betting above your pay grade is always fun. But then we did a little fact check. And the entourage bet is $5. Fucking dyscracia. You can't get any rush out of that on red on a Wednesday. Now we're talking. Hey, listen, double and throw four zeros on the end of it. Oh, man.

10 G hot. So that's what we're doing when we reach. I think we're going to do, I forget the number, $3,500 maybe, or $3,400, $3,500. OK. Once we reach that, it's going to be a $10,000 spin in Atlantic City. T-bone obviously capturing the whole thing with the buddy.

Man, that's a risky one. It's been keeping me up at night, dude. I got a phone call back from FJ Kerback, whoever. F.C. Kerback, for more than great coats. Whoever owns the Jeep, we win this bet. The Jeep is mine. OK. I'll be able to get it.

OK. You're just going to pay cash? Maybe. Come up 10 large. I mean, I don't know if you're up 10 large. Minus cocaine and champagne. You would be up five large. Why would I be up five large, Dickhead?

You don't get the whole $10,000. Yeah, we do. We each get 10 Gs. Yeah, but you started with, you're each putting five in, and then you doubles, you would each get five on top. This is personal cash, by the way, we're talking about, which is currently way more than I have in my bank account.

Let's go on record, man. I got about $2,200 in here. I'm fucking leaking. Yeah, this is make or break right now. It's like the goddamn Titanic over there at DD Bank. I'm fucking shoveling water out, dude. This thing's going under. Women and children get the fuck out of the way.

Dude, that flexial guy to come over. Turn a screen into a boat. I'll tell you what's bad is the credit limit is fake money. Coming up with three Gs in the end of the month. Capital one wants their money. They ain't screwing around. I know, so I think a $10,000 bet is clearly insane. What if we'll be a good time?

Because that is new money, baby. New money is that's fucking. We're going to live it. We're going to fucking do it. I was also thinking about buying like 1,000 scratchers or something and doing it that way. See what we win by a whole wheel of scratchers? Ooh, a lot of work involved.

Yeah, but like a lot of like, that's like a big TikTok YouTube thing. Yeah, Mr. Bees has done that a couple of times. They spend like $100,000 on scratchers and they win like $5 million or whatever. Did they do that? No, they generally lose. Damn, $100,000.

That fucking sucks. Yeah, Atlantic City. $10,000 spin. So that's what we're doing. I'm kicking around the Borgata would be the classiest, which I've only ever been in and then thrown out of. I honestly not sure if I'm allowed back on the grounds. Really?

Yeah. What if you want to go in there and get one of them sandwiches? You can get one of the sandwiches. Yeah, no, one of my buddies got real fucked up and like I was trying to get them out and they like, I thought I was being peacemaker. We went down for a bachelor party or something. Turns out you're throwing haymakers.

Yeah, no, it was more of like, hey man, listen, I got them. Oh, they're like, get them out of here. Peacemaker, you maced a cop. Stole the horse. Man, stealing a cop's horse, that's something. So it was more like, I was just trying to be like, yo, I'll take care of them type there or whatever. Like, I got it.

You're like, get them the fuck. They were like, he's got to go. I'm like, OK. And then as I'm keys, it became an incident. And then they started giving me shit. I'm like, hey, I'm on your side. I don't like this guy either. Give me the taser.

I'll take them. I'll stick them. I think my he might have got banned for life. I don't think I did. I think he had to go to like, he had to go to like, Borgata Court or something. He had to go see a judge like in the basement or something. Tonight on Casino Court.

Were you pommin' and ace that whole time? So either like, we could do the Borgata or we could do like, you know, Wild Wild West or something. Some real Baileys, some real fucking, somewhere you could fucking crank a couple of heaters. Somebody said, Wild Wild West is still in operation. Yeah, we were there. Since we were talking shit about it,

that's where we should maybe go. Yeah, maybe we'll figure it out. But you don't take that kind of action. That's another thing. I don't know, guys. That sounds a little wicky wild. Wild Wild, Jim West, Desperado. Ruff Ryder?

You don't want nada? None of this? None of this? I didn't see the film. Neither did I, but that was a hit. That was a hit in the charts, big man. What do you do? What do you have your head under a rock?

That's Will Smith getting jiggy with it. Ooh, getting jiggy with it? No, that was Wild Wild West, Jim West, Desperado, Ruff Ryder. I actually did see the movie. It was pretty good. Kevin Klein. Wasn't there like an octopus dinosaur or something? There wasn't an octopus at the end.

Got wonky, right? It was Cowboy Robotics with seldom works. Yeah, it's a real tough look. Yeah, that movie is notoriously shitty. Yeah, it's a tough look. It's the water world of the West. Water world's not that big. Hey, I didn't know.

I don't get it. I learned it after the fact. I really like those smokers. They were cool. Who? The smokers. The bad guys were called smokers. That's right.

And they were cranking. Dennis Hopper's squad. Those guys could crank some burnies on a fucking wave runner. They were fucking zipping around. Oh, those dudes are on wave runners. Couple of pole mulls. They were going. How can we have a weaponized wave runners?

More. We should have those. I'm sure. GI Joe had them. No, we don't got them. What do you mean we? I mean, like, they're not stupid. I'm sure they have a wave runner ass thing

with a fucking gatling gun. Do you think? GI Joe, they rocked them. Sort of a mask, I believe. You remember a mask? You're probable. I would assume you're probably way more accurate with an actual gun. There's a little inflatable John thing is.

How about those submarines he can zip around? I want one of that. I want one of those things bad. Yeah. But if you put point that down and hit the gas next thing you know, you might not be able to come up because you could go down. Hey, look at you worried about a thing you're never going to do. This is great.

Welcome back to H Foley, everybody. You really did go from that would be awesome to we're all going to die. Yeah. What if you depressurize the cabin? I'm very scared of the bends, aren't you? No, you get thrown in that tank. What do you? They don't have those tanks everywhere.

You can't. OK, they got that next to the ice machine. You can't even take a bath. What are you talking about? Worrying about the bends. You're crazy. That's like if you go like 200 feet down free diving. And if you come up too quick, you're worried about them.

OK. All right. You haven't been under. See, you haven't been. You haven't wet your hair outside of a shower in fucking seven years. Worried about the bends. OK, scuba Steve. Fuck out of here.