Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - The Wild World of Lil Pete!

Episode Date: October 1, 2026

Are You Garbage presents stand up comedian and internet sensation Lil Pete! You know Lil Pete from stand up comedy, Chrissy Chaos, Growing Up Italian Podcast, Flagrant's New Yorker of the Week, Beer Game Show Presented By Barstool Sports, The P Boiz Podcast, and so much more! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! Watch AMERICAN GARBAGE: https://youtu.be/77zGwlLffWk?si=6E9dBr63JY7HgP9t AYG 2026 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows NEW AYG MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: DraftKings: New DraftKings customers, sign up with code AYG, spend five bucks to get $150 in rewards within 14 days - includes all markets. Ultra: Don’t sleep on @ultrapouches. New customers get 15% Off with code GARBAGE at https://takeultra.com! Gambling Problem? Call one eight hundred GAMBLER, one eight hundred MY RESET. Connecticut: call eight eight eight seven eight nine seven seven seven seven, visit CCPG dot org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty one plus. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days OR Trade with DraftKings Predictions to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable Rewards issued as Fifty dollar click-to-claims every seven days for fourteen days. Terms at d k n g dot c o slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Stop the Presses, gang. The American Garbage Special is out on YouTube right now. Numbers are cooking. We thank everybody for their support. Keep sharing it. Keep telling everybody about it. We love you. Yeah, and if you like what you saw, we are on tour right now,

we're going to be in Appleton, Wisconsin, San Jose, San Diego, Tacoma, Atlanta, Philly, Springfield, Fort Wayne, Connecticut, Phoenix, Arizona, Phoenix, Arizona, Timonial Maryland, Milwaukee, Chicago, Cincinnati, Columbus, all tickets available at RUGarBage.com. If you got a garbage question, come out and see the boy. Yeah. Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage, the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is R.U. Garbage. Oh, yeah. It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find that at the group to be. Classy. Yeah. They get the big old piece of trash. Gourbage.

I'm your host, Dave Trulley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Toadies in a new edition. She just bought a gun. My coach is coming from right next to me. That counts as a win. Luke. Give me a yes or no on that. You've used that one for sure.

No. Dig up the tapes. Show me. Call me a liar. You're a liar. Okay. Got me done the rights on that. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage?

He is an international businessman and my best pal in the whole wide world. Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan, everybody. And that was a lie. Shout out to everybody for tuning in. As always, we just make sure you're ravey, you subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube, full video available over there on Spotify, and the boys are climbing the freaking charts, baby. Then obviously the greatest website of all time,

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But, gang, we could be more excited ever incredibly. And I'm an incredibly special guest here with us today for the first time. This young man has been causing a start. A bit of an internet sensation. Making waves on the internet and in the comedy scene. Very funny stand-up comedian. Give us a favor. Give it up for a little Pete.

Little Pete's here. Talk of to town. guy. Thanks for coming. Happy to be here, guys. Thank you for having me on, man. Of course. You're welcome. Thank you so much for coming in. Give us the backstory, the origin story. I heard it's a sort of tale. Are you a New York kid born and raised? Born and raised, Brooklyn, New York, Bay Ridge.

I've been living in the same house for the last 42 years. Except for the one year that I was in rehab, which was almost 10 years ago. Very nice. You did a year in rehab? Yeah. A year. Did about six months in rehab, then about six months and a halfway. No shit. Yeah. That's a halfway house for you.

I was actually kicked out of the halfway house because they had actually made me the manager of the halfway house. This guy's got stories already. My kind of guy, O'P. Please continue. When they saw how responsible I was and how reliable I was and how much of a leader I am, they said, we want you to be the manager. Yes. We want you to be the manager of the halfway house. I was like, okay, great.

So you know me. I'm always telling my stories. We don't. And strip club stories and everything. One night, you know, some of the clients at the halfway house was like, we would really love for you to take us to a strip club. And I said, you know what? That's a great idea.

We're going. So instead of taking them to the NA meeting, I was taking them to the strip clubs. Sure. wound up hooking up with this cute little waitress. And it became like a regular thing. So no more NA meetings. Now it's like, everybody's going to the bar. Yeah, we're going to the strip club.

Wait, you were taking people from the halfway house to a strip club on a regular basis. On a weekly basis. Were they drinking? In the beginning, no, but eventually it led to it, yes. I caused a massive relapse. Really? If the Bay Ridge went out. And then you were asked to leave the halfway house?

I was asked to leave the halfway house. But why six months in rehab? Oh, that was the program. It was a six-month thing. Six months? Yeah, it was a six-month thing, yeah. Holy shit. You should try it sometime.

Yeah. Okay. All right, let's go back a little further. So, yeah, born and raised Bay Ridge. That's correct. What was the family dynamic? Like mom, dad, brother, sisters. What was the house growing up?

Only child. Only child. My father was Irish, okay? Very Irish Catholic, very into sports. Okay. Everything growing up in my household was basically focused around sports. Like, that was my job. Okay.

Make the baseball team. Make the basketball team. Make the soccer team. It was more important than schoolwork or anything. Okay. Okay. My mother is an Italian woman, also a very Italian Roman Catholic. She was a teacher, a special ed teacher.

Coincidence that she had a kid who's borderline special ed, you know. Is that true? Absolutely. Okay. Yeah. Verbal ability, extremely high. High verbal ability? 98%.

Performance ability, two percent. And I'm like, who the fuck are these two guys that did worse than me? You know what I'm saying? I want to meet them. I want to meet them, you know? Very, very classic New York tale. Irish. Irish Italian.

It's like fucking oil and vinegar. Did your dad play sports when he was growing up? Or he just obsessed with him? No, absolutely. He played in high school for Power Memorial with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. No shit. When he was still Lou Al Cinder. Basketball.

Your dad played with Kareem. Yes, he did. Holy shit. Yeah, Powell Memorial, 1961, correct. Powell Memorial. Yeah, it's not even there anymore. Damn. Is that a public school?

No, I believe it was, I believe it was Catholic. Yeah, probably a Catholic school back in the day. Damn. They're very Catholic, my father's side of the family. Like very, very Catholic. No, not Kareem. A lot walked by, you know. The dream, baby.

Okay. Was, you know, a very New York thing. Was your extended family in the neighborhood as well, like your aunts and uncles? and dad's family, mom's family, or was it? So my mom's family lived in Bensonhurst, but it was just my grandmother and grandfather, where we went every Sunday to have dinner. Okay.

Really? Yes. The larger side of the family, my father's side, the Irish side, they were spread out through Jersey and Rockland County. I only really saw them on the holidays. Gotcha. Yeah.

Rockland County. Correct. Family gets up there. That's bad news. That sounds like you're making it out, but it's it's. It's tough going. Rockin counties are rough.

Okay. Okay. Okay. So how were the grades in school? Okay. The grades in school were good. And did you go to Catholic school or public school? I started it at Adelphi Academy, which is a private school.

Adelphi Academy. Six blocks away from my house, yeah. That sounds like a cable company. Okay. Adelphi is a cable company. Spectrum, Spectrum Academy is where. Went to Time Warner College. So, yeah.

There were on, in the original kindergarten class, there are only seven kids. All right. My mother, my mother made sure in the early part of my life that I was in a small class where the kids got a lot of attention if they needed it. Okay. She knows what she was doing. Yeah, she knew what she was doing. Okay.

At fourth grade level, I attempted to go to poly prep, but they didn't accept me. I was like the only kid in the class that did not get accepted. What's poly prep? It was a higher level private school. Gotcha. Yeah, more expensive, more money, better sports program. Gotcha. Yeah, all of that.

Okay. Then for fifth grade, I went to St. Patrick's, which was like a neighborhood Catholic school. Gotcha. Where I played all my sports. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Huh.

All right. Very interesting. Did your parents stay together? Did they separate? They never got a divorce, but it didn't really help the relationship. They were fighting all in time. Did that eventually move out? No, he died.

He died of a heart attack in 2006. Oh, I'm sorry to hear, bud. Actually had a heart attack while he was refereeing a basketball. ball game. Went to blow his whistle? That was it. And he died right there? He died on the court, yeah. Holy shit. He went doing what he loved though, you know? Damn. Were you at

the game? No, we weren't. Would you have been? No, but my mother typically would have. It's probably not by coincidence that she didn't go that day because it's probably better that she didn't see that. So they still, even though they fought, they still would, they were still, like

she went to his basketball games and he refereed. Yes. We had a golden retriever. a dog female by the name of star that dog probably kept the marriage together more than anything because they used to love to walk it together they used to love to take the dog to the beach even in the winter

if it wasn't for that dog there probably would have been some form of a separation between like between 96 and 2006 with my old man passed you know there's something to be said for that kind of love though yeah yeah kind of gritting your teeth and going to watch them referee you know in their moral sports games

Yeah. What was a vacation like growing up? Oh, wow. So we used to go to Cape Cod. Really? Every year we went to Cape Cod for two weeks in August. Wow. Yeah.

Good vacation. So you had no cousins or anything like that? Like, cousins, your age? Oh, no. On my father's side, yeah, I had several cousins that were year or two older, year or two younger. But you would only really see them once or twice a year. Yeah. Gotcha.

Yeah. What was your crew in Bay Ridge? You have a group of friends? Oh, yeah. I always had a big group of friends. Okay. I was always like that one guy that everybody really wanted to hang out with, you know? Okay.

That good personality. This guy's fucking walks in and takes the room over. 98% verbal. Yes. So you got, yes. You know, please. No, I still want to know who the two guys that did worse than me on the performance test were, you know? Okay.

What was the grocery store that your mom went to growing up? She went. It's called Food Town now. Sure. It was called Met Food back then. Okay. I don't ever heard of a Met Food. Yeah.

Did you ever say what your dad did? Okay, so my father owned his own business. Uh-huh. He owned a route in which he was a middleman, like a distributor. Of? For pasta, cheese. Gotcha. Yeah.

Having a route, having a rouse a good gig. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, he did well, man. Towards the end of his life, like around 2000, the business totally fell apart. And that heard him. That heard him. He became a teacher the last six years of his life so he could teach the kids and coach the kids.

and all that, yeah. Would you guys grew up in an apartment or a house? Private house. Right next to an apartment building. Nice. And your mom still lives there today? We still both live there to this day. You live with your mom?

Correct. Very nice. All right, we're going to get into that. For sure. I like it. What was your first car growing up? Could have been any age because I know New Yorkers at all, you know, it's not like you get a car at 16 or whatever.

So my first car, my parents actually gave me their Volvo, which was a 94 S-70, I believe. Nice car. So that I could drive to college. St. Joseph's College. To St. Joseph. Yes. One with Chris.

Chris de Stefano. Yeah, we were college buddies for four years. St. Joseph's College. Where's that? I didn't know that. Downtown Brooklyn. It is. 2.4-5 Clinton Avenue.

2.4-5 Clinton had that stuff. Right off the fucking G-train. Yeah. No, Chris was the star of the basketball team the all-time league. I didn't know you knew Chris like that. Before I did comedy, before he did comedy. No fucking what that.

Chrissy D. Chris D. was quite the basketball player. Big shout out to Chrissy. You say all-time leading scorer? He is? He's the all-time leading score. All-time leading score.

He's the girls team. You can fact check that. Shout out to Chrissy D. Okay. Wow. A Volvo. I didn't see that. I did not see that coming in a white Cadillac.

Something. I did not see them. My father had a white Cadillac. Yeah. He had a white Cadillac El Dorado. Yeah. What happened to that? I crashed both of them.

Nice. You crashed the El Dorado? Yeah, I did, unfortunately. Was he still alive? Yes, unfortunately. I mean, it sucks. I got an ass kicking for that one, man. Did you?

Yes, I did. How did you do in college? Did you graduate? I, um, I graduated from St. Joseph's College. You did? Yes, but realistically, my mother should have two college degrees. Sure, she did. She was doing a lot of your work.

She was helping me a lot with my work, yeah. So you were living at home, you lived at home through college? I did, yeah. Gotcha. Yeah. Okay. And what was the first job you had? As a teenager or even a kid, paper route, anything?

What was it? Oh, okay. So my first job, well, actually, my first job, well, actually, that my father got me was working at a answer to question straight yeah yeah for actually now it's a very life I love it got me a job working at a cemetery right geez okay which I got fired the first day because I couldn't find the bathroom I took a piss on somebody's tombstone right Pete right for the for the boss to roll up in his cart and be like get the hell out

here you fired oh my sure is a summer job I assume was a summer job what were you supposed to be doing digging graves I know we were like cutting the grass gotcha okay so maintenance Yeah. All right. Yeah. Huh. And what about after that? Did you take the rest of the summer off or?

No, got a job personal training out of Bally's in Elmhurst. How old were you? Like 18 going on 19? That was your first job, 18, 19? Yeah. Were you always in good shape? I was always in good shape, yeah. I guess athletic.

You always lifted? Yeah, since the time I was like 15. Huh. Okay. Oh. What was your first concert? Never went to a concert in my life. Whoa.

You've never been to a music concert. No, but I've been to a lot of like, house music type of parties like sound factory um raves yeah that that type of stuff molly all that kind of shit big time yeah you a lot of mollies a lot of mollies gotcha had my eyeballs spin it had my two pay friggin't standing up straight how when did you start wearing a toupee 2010 2010 when did you as a guy you know uh with male pattern baldness when did you start losing it did you start losing it was you started losing it early started losing it early um I did you did you start losing it early um I did cycle of steroids right in in 2002 for my Cancun senior trip wait wait how old are you I'm

42 you're 42 so in what year was this this is 2002 2002 your high school senior you're in high school you start doing I did a cycle yes I did a cycle because you're going away to Cancun you want to look good on the beach that is correct fucking sharp kid though I don't know to tell you that's all right all right and what your hair starts falling out because of that That was the beginning of it, believe it or not, yeah. Huh, so you start losing in high school. Yeah. How was the Cancun trip?

The Cancun trip was awesome. Yeah. It was worth every year that I took off my life with those steroids. Did you get laid down there? I did. Yeah. I did. Shout out to it.

I remember my mother found my steroids and she was like, you have to stop taking that. I said, sure, right after spring break. All right? I said, I'm going to Cancun. I'm trying to get jacked and I'm trying to get some pussy. Back off. I assume your mother knows everything that goes on in the house. She keeps it pretty clean.

Does she, and this isn't a shot, I'm very close with my mother, lived back at home several times. Does she clean your room? No, not anymore. The last five years, she has macular degeneration. She losing her eyesight. Okay. She had a knee replacement last May. Okay.

She's not walking so well anymore. Gotcha. And dementia runs in her family. Gotcha. The last five years, she's slowing down a lot. Like, it's actually me taking care of her now. Very nice. Okay.

Very admirable. Very admirable. Good moral thing to do. But up until then, she strikes me as a kind of mom. Italian mom. Ran a vacuum five times a day. Kept to play spotless. Yeah.

Do you have any plastic on anything in the living room, the couch or anything like that? Furniture cover or anything. We did, but the cat just clawed through all that shit. And she gave up. Yeah, the cat, Tiger, Boon Boom. He just clawed through everything. Tiger Boombum was the name of the cat. Yes, he takes the biggest shits that cat.

Do you still have the cat? Yeah, he's four years old. Four years old? Correct, yeah. Okay. All right. Growing up, would you drink milk with dinner? And who cooked?

Your mom? My mom pretty much cooked every night. Okay. Yeah. Good cook. Yeah, she was a good cook, yeah. How was her sauce? Oh, her sauce was great, but not as good as her mom's.

Yeah. Her mother, my grandmother, Talia, was actually the better cook of the two. Where you guys would go on Sundays? Yeah. What would that Sunday dinner look like? And would it just be you guys or would it be any relatives of hers? So it was me, my mom, my dad. dad and my grandma and grandpa.

And then my mom's brother who lost his job in 1990, spent six years living at home with them. Nice. Yeah. I really, that was my Uncle Vito. I really liked that guy. He was cool.

He passed? He died of dementia two years ago, yeah. Two years ago. He was cool, though. He let me have a couple of sips of his vodka. He used to take me to the bar. Shout out Uncle Vito. Yeah, shout out Uncle Vito, man.

I used to watch the football games with him. He was betting on him, gambling on him. Guy had a lot of demons, but he was cool, you know. I bet you could still smell that house walking into it on a Sunday. Oh, absolutely, yeah. Yeah, it's fucking awesome. God, I wish I was Italian. Let's talk about Draft Kings, gang.

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After you purchase, they're going to ask you how you heard about them. Please support the show and tell them the boy sent you. Do it. Not back to the show. Not back to the show. But would you do milk with dinner? Was that a thing? You know, I was...

Like milk and pasta, milk and pizza? My mom was never big on the milk. I was drinking water from the time I was like 11 or 12. Sure. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Would your mom make breakfast in the morning for you?

She always did. She did. Yeah. Up until the time I was like maybe 33 years old. No shit. I swear to God. No shit. Yeah.

What are we talking about? Eggs and shit? Eggs, oatmeal. So you come down in the morning. She's in there. It's got the coffee going. Got everything going. Really?

Yeah. Your dad too? Your dad would be down there? Well, my dad on Tuesdays and Thursdays, he used to have to leave the house ridiculously early for his business. Uh-huh. But Monday, Wednesday and Friday, no, he was down there reading the paper. Me and him would be talking about the Nick game or the Yankee game.

And so you never moved out. You've always lived there. Always lived there. So, okay, so you go to college. We'll go back a little bit, but I want to hear that. You go to college. You get your degree. Yes.

In? Human relations. Human relations. And then what do you get a job doing? My first job after college was at a place called Arbor We Care. It was some type of social work. Okay. And it didn't go well.

It didn't last long. I got fired within like the first two months. I stopped my desk. And I went right back to the gym where I was comfortable and, you know, I had leverage. I had a leg up on, you know, other people. You started working at the gym as a trainer. Yeah, correct. So your days were before you did comedy, I assume.

Oh, yeah. This is way before I did comedy. All right. So how old are you? I'm 42. No, no. I mean, how old are you then? 23.

So you're 23. You're living at home. You're working at a gym. Yeah. Okay. And that was your life. You wake up. Your mom had breakfast ready.

You'd go to the gym. You'd come back. Yeah. She'd make dinner. She made dinner. Yeah. My whole day revolved around the gym, working out, you know, training my clients.

I mean, I did my little hustles on the side. I was selling weed. I was selling e-pills and stuff. Because I wanted to make enough money that we could go to the club on the weekends and we could have a good time. What's that look? Look, what's that look like going to the club on the weekend? It's you and what? You and how many boys?

Me and usually a bunch of juiced out guys. You know what I'm saying? Everybody had their hair mohawked. I was mohawked my toupee. Were you really? I swear to God. I was mohawking the toupee all the way around. Do you ever think about letting it go?

The toupee? Yeah. No. You like it. I do. What about getting the plugs? Oh, I did three surgeries with Bosley. With Bosley?

They named them. Oh, my God. You want to hear something crazy? So the third. surgery did not go well. I still have a dent in my head to the stay and I was in a lot of pain. I went to my doctor and I was like, my head's really hurting me. He goes, here, here's some perks that'll make your head feel better. Led to the beginning of my opioid addiction, which brought me to rehab about five years later and left me nearly dead in a coma of May 16th to May 26th

of 2017. Jesus, man. I thought I was going to get my hair back. Yes. Shout out to Bosley. I thought I was going to get my hair back. I wound up getting addicted to dope. But now you could do the thing that everyone's doing, not the turkey one, but they have it here. It's the same thing. Would you ever do that? I would really need to, yeah, I would really need to know that it's going to work better than this, you know? What's that set you back if you don't mind me asking?

This is $700 a month. A month? Yes. Well, what do you have to do? You got to get the upkeep. Yeah, you got to go at least every two weeks. Uh-huh. I'm going tomorrow.

It's not far from here. Right? At 11 o'clock and, yeah, they're going to take it off, clean it, re-glue it. So that stays on like we're in the shower and shit like that. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, all right. I didn't know that. I didn't know that.

Yeah. So you sleep in at everything. Everything, yeah. No kidding. All right. When they bury me at the end of my life, make sure they glue my two peat of my head one last time. Okay. I don't think we'll be there.

Back to the club. What were some of the nicknames? Luke's fascinating. Yeah. What was that crew? What are some of the nicknames that even the kids you grew up with? We had like 10 pets in the crew, man. Okay, so you got big Pete, you got Little Pete, you got Gay Pete, you got Junk Paul Pete, you got Sound Factory Pete, all right, you got nothing.

What was Junk Ball Pete? What's Junk Ball? Oh, he loved Coke that dude, man. He didn't know his name was Junk Paul Pete until he lost his phone one day. It was like, could I borrow your phone to call my phone? And then he rings it and sees Junk Paul Pete come up on the fucking caller I did. He was like, dude, I'm not a junkie. And then he was like, yo, you want to go get some tuttoots?

Yeah. Doot, too, tut. What were some of the clubs you were going to? Well, Sound Factory, when it was Sound Factory, then it became Pasha. Shout up Pasha. Yeah. Do you know this? My boys used to go to Pasha.

Really? Yeah. We used to go to Crow Bar. We used to go to Mansion. Mansion, big. Yeah. I love Mansion, man. That was a great question.

And would you guys go in there and sit down, get a table, do bottle service, all that stuff? You know, we always sat at somebody else's table for the most part. Smart. Yeah. Like them paid a fucking. Yeah. One time that I actually got a table, I remember at the end of the night, like, so many people were sitting there that I didn't know. They were about to kick me at my own fucking table. They were like, hey, who do you know here? I'm like, it's my table. They're like, no, it's not.

At that point, I don't even think it matters anymore. What kind of music is playing? Like hardcore tribal house. The fuck is that? Like that pots and pans Oof, oof. So that's going on. Yeah, yeah.

What are you, are you, so this is what, 2008, 2010? Roughly. In that area, yeah. From 2007 to like 2014. So what are you wearing? Are we talking like, that's a long time. McClellan. That's a lot of Mollies, yeah.

That's a lot of Mollies, bro. That's a lot of drugs. Called a Mollies is real trashy. That's a lot of freaking drugs, Ben. That's a lot of, oof, oof. That's a lot of maze. So you guys would always take, you guys would always be on something. when you're in there.

Yeah. Sitting there getting banged out. Wearing Ed Hardy stuff. Wore a lot of Ed Hardy, wore a lot of Christian order gear. Yeah, true religion. True religion. To this day,

everything is true religion. Yeah. I have true religion jeans. Shout out to it. It was wild, man. It was the total dark side. You know what I'm saying? We were hanging out with escorts,

strippers. What would a check usually look at the end of the night from a club like that? What happened? What would a check usually look like at the end of the night from something? What are you dropping? You probably could have got buying on like three or four hundred bucks.

That's it? What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? We were really drinking much. Maybe get like one drink. You probably buy like like six. Because you're all fucked up on drugs.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was way more of a of a drug party person growing up. Now I'm more of like a wine guy, you know? What kind of wine do you like? So you still drink? I still drink, yeah. Okay.

It's fucking low beat, right? Okay. I don't do opioids. I never did it since I woke up from the coma, but I have partied over the past few years, you know. Gotcha. Yeah, I know. A little toot, two, two, a couple adderals, yeah.

Sure, okay. You know? Kind of California sober. Yeah. Bay Ridge. Bay Ridge Little Pete's sober, you know? Hey, you find out what works for you, you know what you mean? We're walking less of a dark path these days that we once were.

Towards the light, baby. Yes. Towards the light, little bit. Any memorable Halloween costumes growing up since we're around that time? Would you do Halloween? Would you do mischief night, I would assume you and your buddies? I got a hell of a story for you guys. Please me.

First of all, I am dressing up as Chuckie this year. He did say. Why? In mid-performed the performance. So there was one year, right? This is 2008. My grandmother... He's good on years.

2008, so you're in your 20s. I'm 24. Okay. 2008. So my grandmother had been in the hospital for like a month. She had pneumonia. She had been living in an old age home for the past year since my grandmother, my grandfather died. Passed away.

Yeah. So she dies on hollow, morning of 2008. Okay. And my mother comes to tell me and my response is I'm not missing the party of Pasha this weekend. Okay. Because I'm dressing up as a baby.

I'm dressing up as a baby with a diaper and a bonnet and all of it. Uh-huh. And this was my first weekend ever trying crystal meth. Now you were planning on doing that? I was planning on doing that. You're playing? Hey, we're doing crystal meth this weekend. You're snorting it or smoking it?

Snorting it. Snorting it, okay. Yeah. So we had a wild ass weekend. I'd imagine. Dress as a baby doing Crystal meth. Diper. Bring your grandma back to life.

Diper bonnet. And my mother had just sold my grandmother's house. Okay. So, you know, she came into some money. And she gave me a little bit. So I had... What are we talking? She gave me about 10 grand.

10 grand. 20-year-old kid. She hands you 10 grand. Handed me 10 grand. Now, was she aware of your nefarious activities? No, not at this time. Obviously. Not at this time.

Yeah. So we had... had a while weekend i rented out a hotel room all my friends everybody's dressed up you know so where do you rent a hotel if you don't mind me ask you maritime maritime wait in the city yeah in the city the mar on the west side yeah correct jesus i stayed there and i'll never forget man me me and this me and this me and this guy it's a nice hotel beautiful for yeah beautiful so me and this guy were competing for this one girl all night right we leave the hotel to go to the the the part of the This is on, excuse me, this is on a Friday.

Okay, this is Friday night. It's Friday night. We leave the hotel. I leave all my friends in the hotel to go to the party at Pasha. Uh-huh. We get to the front. Dress as a baby. I'm dressed as a baby.

You're on Crystal Meth. I'm on Crystal meth. What's she dressed out? She's dressed as red riding hood. This dude did not have a costume. Oh, come on. Is he your boy? I just met him that night.

You got him hanging out in your hotel room? You met him that night? Well, he came with her. He came with her. He came with her. Okay. Were they in itemish? They had just met on a dating site.

They hadn't hooked up yet. Nor had I hooked up with her. Did you know she was coming? Oh, yeah. I called her to invite her. Uh-huh. So we get to the front gate of posh. She brings a dude.

She brings a dude. But little Pete. Yeah. Little Pete can't be stopped. He wants to get in there. So we get to the front gate of posture, right? This dude has quarters. He's got quarters.

In rappers, I pulled out a G. You know what I'm saying? I pulled out a G. Game over, you know? Game over. So we go in there. You know, we had a great time. Me and her end up going back to the hotel.

But we did not hook up. I think he went home. Okay. We stayed there until like 3, 4 o'clock in the afternoon, and she tells me I want to go to Pasha again the next night. And I'm like, well, I got my grandma's funeral coming up. I'm not sure if I could do that. So you guys, is she doing Crystal too?

No, she didn't do no crystal. Okay. But you guys are up all night? Up all night. Yeah, I think she did like Somalis, but she didn't do no crystal. Okay. And it's just you two hanging out in the hotel room? Just us now.

Talking, whatever? Talking, yeah, whatever. Gotcha. Yeah, she actually ended up giving me a ride home, everything. Okay. So now I get up to go to Pasha the next night. You stay at the hotel. No, no, I went back to my house.

About three or four the afternoon. Yeah. Okay. Change your diaper. Yes. Absolutely change the diaper. My mother tells me you can't go out again tonight. I got the whole family coming tomorrow.

I was like, all right. On Sunday or Saturday? This is on a Saturday. All right. So they're coming Sunday. Yeah, they're coming Sunday. Same day is the New York City, Marathon. So I sneak out the house. I go pick the girl up in a car service. We go back to

Pasha, right? Meet up with all my friends there. Wild night. A lot of party and a lot of drugs, everything, you know? Towards the end of the night, I end up sliding out the back door, right? I was all Ked out. Ked out. Kedatine. Yes. Sliding at the back door on purpose? No, I just literally bumped into the back door. Next thing. I'm like, where the hell am I? Okay. I end up getting into a limo with some guy that I do not know, okay? And I'm telling him, like, I got to get home to Bay Ridge. You know, I got my grandmother's, you know, I got my grandmother's wake tomorrow. Okay.

And he starts driving me, but then, like, I get, like, paranoid. I thought I got kidnapped by Albanians. Listen, you do not want to cross Albanians. You know what I thought I got kidnapped by Albanians. So I'm telling the guy, like, I have to make a phone call, blah, blah, blah. And this is back when they're the driver? Yeah, this is back when there was still pay phones. So, like, I'm trying to call my mother from a.

freaking pay phone and I'm dressed as a baby by the way. Wait, you are? I'm still dressed as a baby. You got redressed as a baby to go out that night. Yeah, like I regress. You slowly weekend posh. You stuck out of the house dressed as a baby. Yes, bonnet.

And got to a car service. Got to a car service. Did you have a jacket or anything? At a jacket. Okay. It's not an animal. All right. So, um.

And this limo driver. He thought I was trying to get away without paying the bill so he kept picking me up and putting me back in the limo. I am like, I am definitely getting kidnapped right now. Definitely getting kidnapped. Holy shit. So we finally get back to Bay Ridge is the New York City Marathon going on.

So I can't get to my freaking house. This is during the day. It's during the day now. We partied the whole night. And we have to run across the marathon to get to my house. You say we, who's we? Me and the car service driver.

And the guy... Why's he running? Why's she running with you? Are you in the car? We got to get to my house. I have no money left on me. Oh. My money's dropped.

My money's dropped. It's gone. It's spent. So this guy's going with you. To get his money for the car service. So you parked the car on the one side and you guys have to walk across the... We ran across the New York City Marathon, me dressed as a baby and some fat fuck car service driver going across the marathon. Well, the marathon is coming this way.

Right into my front door where I got my whole family dressed up in black suits. I walk in as a baby. Oh, my God, dude. And I'm shaking everybody's hand like, yeah, yeah, how are you guys doing? It's been a while since I seen you. Ma, can I get $100 for the car service guy? for your loss. Yes.

Holy shit. Was that, was that the, hey, we need to have a talk about your partying conversation? That was one of the first ones.

That was one of the first ones. That was one of the first ones. Interesting. God damn, well, Pete. And then the, then you had one bad night where you ended up in a coma

and that sent you off to rehab. Well, that was years later. That was years later. Okay. What did your crew think of like the Jersey Shore people at the time? Oh,

they were big fans of the Jersey Shore. Big fans, yeah. I used to live. love that show yeah did you grow do did you ever are you a seaside guy oh we used to go yeah used to go yeah shout out DJs yes one of the greatest clubs what DJs DJs DJs and seaside have you been there yeah I been there have yeah I been there yes I have why what do you mean why it's being well I was clubbing dude you were I was clubbing no you weren't the DJ it's a boy it's in the home depot um hmm I mean yeah please no I don't I mean I don't know I don't know I don't know

where to go after that. You do Christmas at the house with your mom? Oh, yeah. White lights on the tree? Colored lights. Colored lights. Yeah. You decorate the outside of the house?

We used to. We haven't done in the past few years. So you're kind of running the household now. Yeah, that's correct. Nice. Now, what, you know, please, if I'm stepping over the line, how is it bringing ladies over the house in the past and now? Or do you do away games?

I do a lot of away games. But I have brought a few chicks over the house in the past couple of years. Nobody actually met my mother. She was not home on Saturday when I would bring them. She's usually at the boyfriends. Your mom's got a boyfriend. Oh, yeah, yeah. So she's okay to go to the boyfriend.

She's not like, you see. Yeah, no. She doesn't walk on her own, you said. She's walking better, but she's needing a little bit of help. Gotcha. So she still has an active social life. Yeah, yeah. To a degree.

Okay, so she's over with the boyfriends. Yes. girl comes over what does she say you say oh this is like my mom was here said none of them met them yeah no i i put her on the table i'm they're aware of yeah i was gonna say they know it's not a fucking bachelor pat it's obviously a family home yeah there's picture of me my mom my dad the dog from the 90s sure sure you guys keep the butter on the counter in your house or you keep it in the refrigerator we actually don't have butter at all what yeah my mother hates that stuff like butter and stuff yeah butter yeah she doesn't like olive oil i assume we have olive oil yeah yeah okay

No butter. That's a first. Get the fuck out of here. Holy shit. You guys have a bakery that you get fresh bread from? Oh yeah, Pani Antico, right up the block from my house. Pony Antigua. You have a pizza place that you go to all the time over there too?

Nino's. Nino's pizza? Big shout out. Ninos and big rich. You do slices or pie? Slice. What's your go-to slice order? Pepperoni.

Respect. Would you guys get pizza delivered to the house? We do, but sometimes it's actually quicker if you just walk up the block. and get it. I'll get the block and get it. Yeah, yeah. So you're do pizza on like a Friday night. Would you do the seven fishes at Christmas?

I don't really like to eat fish. But would you guys have that? It's been done. My mother loves fish. Uh-huh. Yeah, but it was only one year that we did that. What was the last vacation? What was the last vacation you went on?

In 2019. It's always a year. In 2019, I actually went to Mardi Gras in New Orleans. It was like it was a company trip. Okay. What is the current occupation, if you don't mind me as? Deja, what's your day gig? Okay, so have you guys ever heard of J.G. Wentworth?

My wife, yeah. So, yeah. Yeah, I work for a company that does that, but like a way smaller family. And what do you do? Exactly. Like, I'll broker the sale of an annuity. If somebody's looking to get cash for their annuity, I will determine the value of it. And, you know, I will broker the lump sum of money that comes from them from the institutional bank to the person that's selling their payments, their annuity.

Wow. So that's like if I came in, okay, if I got hit by a car and I was getting $5,000 for the rest of my life, you would give me a lump sum and replace it at. Correct. Right. And a smaller value. At a smaller value. Yeah.

And then you would take the monthly payments. Yeah. So what do you get commission on that? I get commission, yeah. Are you doing well? I've done well the last five, six years. No shit. Yeah.

Huh. I've never talked to anybody that worked in that. And I've, you know, growing up every dirtbags that's my money and I need it now type thing. What are most of the annuities? Is it like insurance payments or is it lottery? It's insurance and lottery payments. Those are the only two. Either people that have been injured and they can't really work anymore

or people that have won small scratchoffs usually between like one to 10 million. That's a small scratchoff. Yeah, we don't do like Powerball guys anymore. Since you've somewhat gotten, you know, you went to rehab and did all your stuff and just have wine now and all that stuff, have you been good with money? since then. Oh, yeah, yeah. Would you say, you can read that?

Would you say you're north or south of that? Just curious what you're holding. I was north of that at the end of 2024. And then I reinvested my crypto. Uh-huh. Okay, and I lost some money and I'm a little bit south of that right now. Just a little bit south of that. Right now that's about what you're sitting on.

It's a great fucking number. God damn, Lil Pete. It's a great number. It's little Pete's money and he needs it now, dog. And you guys own the home. We own the home. Right. which I assume is skyrocketed in price since when your parents bought it.

Oh, yeah, they bought it for probably like 100 grand back in the 80s. Now I'd say it's north of a million. Probably right on the cusp. Yeah. That's a classic answer. What are you whipping around town? You got a car? I have an Accura.

You have an acura. Of course you do. Buy it new or certified pre-owned? I bought it pre-owned last year. One of my friends from childhoods, is a car dealer. He goes to the auction. Did you drive in here? Did you take a subway?

I drove. Yeah. You drive a lot as opposed to thinking the subway or car service? Yeah, I drive like crazy. Those deep Brooklyn guys don't ever take the subway. Yeah. It's always cars. You get the car detailed a lot?

Like once every two or three months. Once every two or three months. That's pretty good. Keep it clean in there? A lot of water bottles. Do you eat in the car? No. I'm not the neatest theater.

No? I'm not the neatest theater. What size bed do you got? You got a king-sized queen? No, I sleep in a twin-sized bed. I'm sleeping a twin. You got a twin-sized bed. Same room.

I've been sleeping in that room. since 1992. What's the what's this? Has it been moved around like if you it the the the linoleum was redone and the walls were painted and the door was fixed because like there was a point when I couldn't even lock the door to my room so like I was afraid to even like jerk off I was afraid my mother's gonna walk in my god lopee exactly yeah what's like about chime as you know baby life comes at you pretty quick you ain't lying big man start adding up

uh huh you know what I'm saying I wish you I could go back and tell my younger self, if you're going to do a little banking, make sure you save your money, make sure you do it right, watch out for bank fees, all that kind of stuff. I'll tell you what I really wish. I could go back and say, hey, I wish I had chime. I know. Listen, if you're out there, this is where chime comes in.

Chime is changing the way people bank. It's hard, listen, it's hard enough to keep a buck as it is. Then you got these big corporate banks coming after you. Overdraft fees. Overdraft fee. Monthly statement. They got it. Oh, $5 for this, $10 for that.

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Chime is a fintech, not a bank. Banking services and chime card provided by Chimes Bank Partners. Qualifying direct deposits required. Terms and limits apply. Go to chime.com slash disclosures for details. What, uh, wait. Wait, wait, do I hear that linoleum in the bedroom? Mm-hmm.

The floor's linoleum, yeah. Like a wooden looking. linoleum. Oh, I understand what you say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I got you. Yes. Okay, okay. That makes a little more sense. Can you remember what that's called specifically. Polly something? I don't know. Huh. But all right. So it doesn't look like a kid's room. What's on the walls? Any posters or anything? No posters. Um, no. Just a mirror and the walls are like actually like a lightish tint of green, which is supposed to help you fall asleep at night. Very close. You ever have any, uh, uh, uh, fish tank in there, hermit crab, anything like that? Any other pets?

Other than the cat. No, no pets other than the cat. Any holes in the wall that you've punched? No, not currently. Okay. But at some point? At one point there was a hole in the wall. Not from me, from a friend.

Yeah, that was just like, whiling out, and he slapped the wall on his hand with it. Gotcha. How old were you, when you got your passport, or do you have your passport? Well, I got my passport when I was 18 going to Cancun. I don't think I still have that. Yeah. You haven't traveled outside the country since you were 18. I went to the Bahamas when I was 22.

Okay. Never been to Italy. Never been to Italy. Huh. Okay. Do you think white lighters are bad luck? No. You do karaoke?

Never done karaoke. Never done karaoke. You steal a steak night from a from a steakhouse? No, never. Never? You steal anything? No. Like airport or anything like that?

Never. What's a date look like? You go out, you do a drink or like if you're like a nice lady out. What are you doing? I go to Fushimi. in my neighborhood a lot. I've done a couple of TOWs, done a couple STKs. Okay.

That's where you take them. Yeah. Obviously, a little P-Pays? Yeah, no, always. Good tipper, I assume? Good tipper. Good tipper. Very nice.

Okay. Where are, uh, I'm married. What are you doing the apps? Is it more? Um, no, I was on Hinge, like, real briefly. Um, three gigantically fat bitches hit me up. You know? And Hinge was sending me the link asking me if I want to boost my profile.

I was afraid to click on it. Because I was afraid if I did that more fat bitches were going to hit me up, you know? You're like a slender gal. What does the name Martinelli's mean to you? Martinelli? Mm-hmm. You mean Stevie Martinelli? I don't know.

Martinellies. Martinelli? Apple juice company? Oh, I never heard of it. Really? It's the glass apple, the classy glass apple juice. Huh. Do you ever have a Manhattan special?

Never had a Manhattan special. No shit. You have an egg cream. I think I had like one or two of those. I'm kidding. Okay. Um, hmm. You ever have your picture taken with an exotic animal, a monkey, koala.

I don't think so. Ever have your picture taken with an exotic dancer? A couple of times. What was the name of the last strip club you went to? Um, I go to Hustler, strip club for the most part. It's actually closing down. The one over on like, whatever. On the west side.

Yeah, I go there a lot. What's a lot? Um, like every two, three months. You go there for a night? Yeah, for the night, yeah. Have a couple of beers? Have a couple of glasses and wine. talk to some, you know, chicks.

Sometimes we do the back rooms. You go to their solo or you go to a couple of your boys? It could be either or. As of the last few years, I mostly went solo. No kidding. Yeah. Expect that. Yeah.

That's like, that's a level of, I don't want to say creepily. You get older. I like going, I like going by myself. I don't need the whole, I don't need the big group thing. I'm going, I want to do my own thing. Will you go out to dinner by yourself? I do, but not at like a fancy spot, you know. Gotcha.

Like, I'll eat at like bar restaurants by myself. Sure. You cook at the house? I cook breakfast every morning, sometimes dinner. You make dinner for your mom? I do, yeah. What do you normally make? We'll make, like, like, breaded chicken cutlet, like with pasta. Make, like, steak with, like, mushrooms and asparagus and spinach.

Very nice. Like I said, the rolls, the last, since the pandemic, like, the rolls totally changed. The universe was like, you guys don't want to cut the cord? All right, we're switching this shit up. You're charged now. Yeah. We're switching it up. Do you read it all?

I read on my phone about like, you know, the stock market, about, like, crypto, that kind of stuff. What kind of crypto you into? I like the AI and RWA blockchain tokenization. Like he's saying, I don't know. Do you know what he's talking about? Yeah. Like near protocol, render, like those types of coins, yeah. I don't know.

Are they like the, I'm a proper idiot when it comes to it. Are they like the ones that are like really cheap with the big upside? Yeah, correct, yeah. You could win big, but you could also lose your shirt too. Lose your pants. Lose your toupee, lose everything, you know. Lose the accurate dog. Do you go to the dentist regularly?

Oh, yeah. You floss every day? Every day. You floss every day. No shit. Yeah, I try to get my teeth white and like once a year. Once a year. You go tanning?

I do. You do? I do. You got like a monthly membership somewhere or you jump around? It's not a monthly membership. Like you get like five tanning. and one free one. Right.

And I'll try to base it around like if I'm doing something like important. You know, like the last time that I went tanning was right before like Tim Dillon's party in the summer in the Hampton. Sure. I had there. He said he saw a little Pete. Oh, you were there? You're there? You son of a bitch.

You didn't even know you were there. I muscleed up to courage and say goodbye to you when I left. Oh, that's wrong. Oh, I'm sorry. That was me. I was a little drunk that day. I thought that was Roseanne Bard. Look at you.

not even getting spotted at the party. What do you forget about that? No, I was just watching tires with him on it. And when I realized you were on the show today, I was fucking amp because I was just watching that scene where you blackmailed the dude. And I was like, that shit was so fucking gangster, bro. That was so gangster.

Thank you, buddy. I appreciate that. When you shower, bar soap or liquid gel? No, bar of soap always. What do you use? What's the brand? Dove, like white dove. Yeah.

No washcloth, just straight bar soap. Yeah, yeah. And what's the shampoo? Do you have to wash that? Or no, what's the protocol? They don't want you to shampoo it. They want you to spray it with a specific spray. Okay.

Take a comb that they give you, put a little bit of water in it and just run it through like that, you know? Yeah. Yeah. The getting it wet is like that from a faucet, not a good thing, you know. So you can't just have the shower blasting on your head. No, yeah. Really? You got to be careful with that.

The other day when I went to one of those Asian rubbing tugs, you know, like they make you shower before they fight you down. Yeah. And she shined the faucet on my head. I was like, toupee, toupee, too pay. How do you say toupee, Amanda? And she was like, oh, to pay, how much you pay. Did you get a happy ending? Absolutely.

Okay. Now, was it like the whole thing or just the happy end? Like, was the. I did full service. Full service. That's what? Massage, nice massage. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What's that run you? That's a corner of 20 bucks. That ain't big. At least a little stress. No, yeah. Especially in this economy. Sure. Sure.

Will you sneak or even growing up? Did you sneak snacks into the movie theater? I don't think I ever did that. No. You keep it pretty tight as far as your diet. Do you eat fast food or anything? I eat junk food, but I'll try to like do that one day out of the week, you know? Okay.

What tickles your fancy? I love pizza. I love rolling roaster. What's rolling roaster? Rolling roaster's in Sheepshead Bay. It's like... Making eyes on it. It sounds like chicken.

Yeah, it's like a chicken. chicken type of burger place and it's really good. Huh. If you like five guys or if you like Wendy's, you will love this place. Oh, that looks old school. It is. It is. They got milkshakes.

They got pizza. They got everything, man. What about candy? You like candy at all? I love chocolate. You like chocolate. Yeah. Ice cream.

Sure? Yeah. Keep ice cream in the house? On Sundays. On Sundays. Yeah, we'll get ice cream. You and your mom? Yeah, correct.

Like you'll go out and get it or you'll get like a pint? I usually go to either this place little cupcake up the block for me Or I'll go to Carvel And we'll get like it's it's smaller than a pint But it's I'll get that for the house, you know Gotcha you guys have a little ice cream Yeah my mother'll stick a fork in anything At first she'll be like no I don't want it then you leave it there

She'll give it 20 minutes So you guys hang a lot of the house You guys watch TV and she liked that together Were you sit and watch a show? You know as of late Not really because like she is obsessed with watching this show NCIS That I can't stand.

Crazy. Yeah. It's on every second of every day. I want to watch the Knicks. Sure. I want to watch the Yankees. I want to watch the Giants. And because my old man was so into sports, she can't even look at it at this point.

Right. Yeah. So I'm just like, all right, I'm going to the bar. She's like, no, no, no, no. I'll put it on. I'm like, no, no, watch your shit. I'm going to the bar. And you'll go to a local bar right there.

A local bar. Hang out, have a couple of pops. Exactly, you know. Just wine. You have your. Pino Grigio. Exactly. What brand Pino?

Do you have a go to? Sauvignon Blanc? Yeah. Lately, I've actually been trying really not to drink that much wine, you know? Okay. A sugar, right? Yeah. Wait, you drink Sauvian Blanc or Pinot Grisio?

Either or. Either or. Yeah, whatever they have. Gotcha. Nice. You like an edible? I've never done an edible. Really?

I've never done any type of hallucinogenic. Never did shrooms, acid, or edibles. Okay. You smoke weed? I do. I do, yeah. Okay. Vapen.

Do your vape pen? Before bed, mostly to fall asleep. Take the edge off. Yeah. You go to bed, do you have the TV on in your room? I don't have a TV in my room. You don't have a TV in my room. You don't have a TV.

When you go to bed, you go to bed. Lights out, bang. My room is literally just for sleeping. There's not a whole lot to do in it. Gotcha. Yeah. Who was the most famous person you met growing up? Could have been like a local celebrity, like a Yankee or something.

It didn't have to be like a movie. Okay, so we went to, I had a kid on my soccer team growing up, right? His father was the chiropractor. for the WWF. So, yeah, we, we, I met Steiner, I met Triple H, yeah, we met macho, man. Sick. Those, those were the funnest events, like when we used to get to go to WWF, man. I love that shit.

Who's your favorite wrestler of all time? Mankind. Shout out to Mankind. Shout out to Mankind with the mandible claw, Mr. Sacco. Mr. Sacco. And let me tell you, Vince McMahon's one of my idols, man. He's one of my fucking... I've never heard that.

That's great. I never put two and two together. that the WWF would have a fucking chirofractor. Because they probably got six guys on. Yeah, it makes perfect sense. That's a good one. You call them starters or appetizers? Appetizers.

What's the go-to order at a diner if you go to a diner? Like mozzarella sticks, chicken wings. Uh-huh. Very nice. Probably a cheeseburger for the main course. Cheeseburger for the main course. You watch Shark Tank? I've never seen it.

Okay. Interesting. Tough to get a real. Some things that I think are going to get you on. I don't... Are you currently in a beef with any neighbors? Anybody across the street? Not really.

Like, this past year, my next door neighbor was annoyed that I hadn't shoveled my snow yet. Yeah. But I was going to do it eventually. Sure. I get around to do it. Come April, you know what I mean? That was almost a little bit of a spark, you know? And I'm sure if you guys have heard the story on the internet, me and my mother's boyfriend,

actually got a fist fight on Christmas 2023. I don't think I have. Same boyfriend now? Yeah. Yeah. He basically yelled at me for not getting a pint of ice cream on sale. And I told him to leave the house. He did not want to leave.

This is two years ago, so you're 40. Christmas, 22, I was actually 39 at the time. Okay. So we got in a fist fight. Hold on. You went and bought ice cream on Christmas Day? This is the day before Christmas. So Christmas Eve? What'd you get ice cream for? well for Christmas Day

And it wasn't on sale That's what he got upset about There was one on sale But I didn't get that one And he was like what the first Were you paying for it? Well this is what happened right My mother had sent me to the store

And she was like This is the stuff you get for Christmas Eve This is the stuff you get for Christmas She didn't tell me that the Christmas stuff Was his stuff and he was reimbursing her He's very particular about grocery shopping Instead of figuring out how to make it in life He figured out how to save money on fucking groceries

So he walks in on Christmas and he's like, Christmas Day, yeah. He's like, get over here, I got to talk to you. And I was like, what's he, Italian? He's Italian. Okay. Older Italian guy? He's 74 at the time of this fight. Okay.

And the way he spoke to me, like, I just snapped out. I start yelling, get the fuck out of my house. He's like, I'm not leaving. It's not your house. I'm like, I go to the door. I open the door. I say, get the fuck out. Get the fuck out.

he takes the time to vent about all the things that he's been wanting to say. It's like you're short, you live with your mother, this, that. Jesus Christ, what a dick. He goes, you're never going to make it in comedy. I'll go, I go, yeah, fuck your dead wife. I'm like, fuck your dead wife. So he takes off his beret, and he comes up. He wears a beret?

He wears a beret. He starts. He's not a guardian angel, is he? I hope not. He doesn't sound Italian if I'm being honest with you. He starts slapping me in my living room on Christmas. Flapping you? Yeah.

So I hit him, boom, boom, he goes down, right? Yeah. My mother's screaming. He gets back up, right? I'm hoping the guy doesn't have a heart attack. He has a very bad heart, seven stents. I'm glad to see him get back up. He takes a metal umbrella can and slams it over my toupee.

Fucking thing goes flying. Then I hit him again, right? And I grab him by his shirt and I throw him out the front door. People looking at the Christmas lights. I get over him, I'm like, you fucking pussy, you don't never. talk to me like that. I'm out here with love, baby. It's fucking little beat, dog. He goes to the police precinct.

Files a police report says, I assaulted him. Next day I get home from work, knock on the door. It's the cops. I went out in handcuffs like John Gotti. So you got arrested. I got arrested. Did he drop to charges? No. We had to get a lawyer, okay? My mother, who was the only witness, basically testified that I acted in self-defense. Nice.

And the case was dropped. Nice. And he's still involved with your mom? Yes. I told her you have to get back with him because otherwise you'll be home ruin of my life, you know? So does he stick? Have you guys made up?

You know, it's funny? This past week, he needed to go to the hospital for another stent and a hernia surgery. I took him. I took him. Good for you. You got a nice heart. Yeah.

And after we get done with him in the car. After we get done with this and I get home today, I'm going to go grocery shopping for him. Are you really? I swear to God. Is he staying at your house or is he in this place? No, he's at his house,

which is two blocks away. Well, make sure you get the ice cream on sale. I know, no, this time I'm prepared. What kind of ice cream was it? Canoli-flavored Ben and Jerry's. He wanted you to get that on sale. Yeah, he wanted me to get the $2.99 discount, yeah. And would you get instead?

That's what this was over. I paid full price for that and some green tea ice cream, and he lost it. And then I lost it. Jesus Christ. You know? Hey, little pizza like the ice cream. Canoli-flavored Ben and Jerry's ice cream?

is delicious. It's not where getting your head cracked open, but it's good. I've never seen it. I don't have a bed and jerry's man. Huh. That, I mean, fist flight in your mom's boyfriend. I mean, a little peach trash. Yeah, that's crazy. That's crazy. It's trash. When was the last wedding you went to?

Last wedding I went to. It's a good question. I could tell you the last funeral I went to. Sure, go ahead. My best friend's father actually passed this past summer. It was like maybe mid-July. Sorry for you. Yeah, yeah. Nice service?

Oh, it's a beautiful service. It's a beautiful service. Okay. The last wedding I went to, I can't even think of it off the top of my head. What do you slide in the envelope at a wedding? Say one of your cousin's kids got married or something. Like $2.250. Two, good.

Good answer. Didn't even have to think about it. You bring abroad with you to the wedding? The last wedding that I remember going to, which is probably like in the 2010 era, I did not. Is there a lucky lady now that you're court, like, is there a, semi-serious relationship, serious relationship, anything going on? You still play in the field. I was, like, dating one of the girls that I had met at the Hustler Club.

Like, we were kind of, like, going to dinner, like, maybe, like, once or twice a month for, like, the last year or so. Yeah, she's a cool girl, great person. Dancer. Dancers. She's a very ambitious young lady. I like that about her. You know, and her schedule is crazy, busy as mine is. So, like, the most we would really have the chance to meet up is maybe, like, once or twice a month, you know?

You still kind of do that? Yeah. We still meet up once a place a month. You guys are? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yes. Have you ever gone to your high school reunion? I have not.

You have not? Take that off the list. Any future trips coming up? You got any plans to go anywhere? You know, we were actually supposed to go to Los Angeles last year. I was supposed to do Bad Friends podcast. Okay. Shout out to the boys.

Yes. Big shout out to Andrew, Bobby Lee, Carlos Herrera. So it was the week of the riots. All right? and I was actually... I was sure there was riots? I don't remember for what? I don't know if I want to ask what it was for. So yeah, it was the week of a riot.

It was the week of the riots. Okay. I was on my... Social economic commentary. I was on my way to the airport. I called Carlos and he was like, yo, bro, these riots are crazy. Andrew left town.

We got her schedule. Oh, shit. And we just never really wound up like glocking in a date. Was it the fires? Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Not the riots.

Riot. Yeah. I am so like, I have no idea what goes on in LA, you know. Something to do with Rodney King. I'm not really sure. So, yeah, but I still talk to Carlos, and I wanted it, because I have the hotel on the flight for like another year. Oh, you got the credit.

Yeah, got the credits. Great, nice. Yeah, love that. You like to do a staycation. You ever just get a hotel room in the city now? You do. I feel like, yeah, that's right. That's right in the wheelhouse.

Yeah, yeah. You like room service? Do a little room service? I haven't done room service. Well, you hang out, just hang out in the room and just relax. Hang out in the room, chill. Yeah. When was the last time you were on a plane?

Probably 2019 when I went to New Orleans. Okay. 2019. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I'm overdue. I'm overdue. You do a cruise?

Never done a cruise. I feel like you'd love a cruise. I think I would love a cruise. Do you like Florida? I love Florida. Where have you been down in Florida? I've been to West Palm Beach. I've been to Tampa.

I've been to Fort Lauderdale. Actually, I have a cousin that lives in Fort Lauderdale. Cousin lives in Fort Lauderdale. Yeah, the overdardale. Yeah, the overdoverdardale. Yeah, the overdoverdoverd. Yeah, the overdoverdoverd. that I was telling you guys about that was at Palm Beach Gardens Hospital.

Okay. Yeah. What you OD on? I actually got some oxycodone that was cut with fentanyl. Gotcha. Yeah, and it was four pills. I did all four of them in the bathroom and a chick fillet. Uh-huh.

You snorted them or you- I snorted them? Nice. I went down in a gas station. I was buying cigarettes. Thank God there was an ambulance filling up at the pump. No shit. And they were like, yeah, put them in here.

We'll take them to the hospital. Narcan? It was beyond Narcan. And I had to be put on life support, and they had to actually stick the needle in my heart because my heart stopped. Yeah. They had to shock me. I caught, like, a deadly pneumonia called Klebsiella.

They had to do an amazing, like, life-saving surgery where they had to put a tube in me here and another one there, and they had to, like, drain the infection out. This is all pre the rehab. This was after I had been kicked out of the rehab. Ah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like a week later.

Gotcha. Yeah. It's a miracle you're here. second chance of life. Definitely, man. Very familiar with it. Love to see it, man. Love to see it.

Thank you guys. I got one more. I'm pretty, I mean, I think I got all the information I need. I'm just convinced. Chick-fil-A bathroom? I'm just curious now. I think you're a very interesting guy. What's your favorite movie?

I've never, we've never asked this. What's your favorite movie? Very good. All right. I got three. Give a run on the, give me 10. All right, all right. The Lion King.

The Lion King. and not fucking see that comment. The Hawaiian kid. Yes, I love that movie. I remember when my mother took me and my best friend to see it in 1994. Uh-huh. One of the best days of my life, man. Love the movie theater.

You know, I think it was United Artists in Sheepshead Bay. Love it. Yeah. True romance with Patricia Arquette and Christian Slater. Yeah, that was great, man. Okay. That was fucking great. And I have to say, Gladiator.

Holy shit. You knew. Lil'L Pete. Lion, King, and Gladiate. I have come to reclaim Rome, baby. That is fantastic. Well, now Little Pete has come to reclaim Rome. Let's go.

Love to fucking see you. What time for Little Pete, everybody. Little Pete, ladies and gentlemen, 100% garbage, but 100% fantastic. My kind of guy. Thank you, you so much for coming in and sitting with this. Appreciate you. Do you have anything coming up? Do you want the folks to know?

I am going to be starting my own podcast in a new year called Little Pete Big World. Well, I like that. That's sick. And I'm going to be headlining. the Brooklyn Art House on Halloween. I'm going to be dressing up his Chuckie. I'm going to be doing all new material. It's going to be a wild night.

And you guys can just basically get tickets. There's a link in my bio. Love that. Little Pete, ladies and gentlemen. We love it. One more time for little Pete, me. Let him fucking hear it. Kippie, what are you got for him?

Guys, our tour is about to get underway. The Army of Garbage Tour. We're starting off in Appleton, Wisconsin. For five, four or five shows. I'm our San Jose, San Diego. Tacoma, Philly. Get your tickets at RUGarbage.com. We love you.

Pete, we love you. I love you guys too, man. Gang, we love you, and we'll see you in three days. Peace.