Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Tom Cassidy: Philly Kid

Episode Date: January 18, 2021

Kippy and Foley are back with their old pal Tom Cassidy. The boys talk sneaking into sporting events, trashy cars, and trashy families! Its a fun one! Bonus Episodes: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage T-Shirts: https://www.PodcastMerch.com Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? You're Trash.

Hey, what's up guys? Thanks for tuning in to R U Garbage. Please make sure you go subscribe to the YouTube channel, that way you get the videos as they come out. Yeah, do it. Welcome to another exciting edition of R U Garbage. The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is R U Garbage.

It's a show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out they grow up classy or if they're absolute trash. I'm your host H Foley coming at you on a beautiful day down here in Tutti's basement. Ran upstairs to grab a snack, caught at Tutti in her nightgown and I gotta say the Pilates are working girl. So fucking keep it up. Tight little body on Tutti. Keaster on Tutti. My co-host is coming at you from right next to me. He is the CEO of R U Garbage.

CEO, COO, fucking JOO, whatever that is. He does it all. So if you're an investigatory body for the federal government or starts with three letters, keep it fucking moving. Or if you're an asset for the state of Ukraine, Kevin is the one you want to talk to. Kevin James Ryan everybody. Hey, what's up everybody? Thanks for tuning in as always. Please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube.

Those numbers are true to fucking roof. True to roof there. Kids are cooking on YouTube. Oh, yeah. And then also patreon.com slash R U Garbage. Guys, we're almost at our third goal of 600 patrons. The support has been fucking fantastic. We're this is a fucking bootstrapped organization here.

It's the fuck it's a three man team and we're doing it all. It's the support of you guys really makes it fucking happen. We appreciate it so much. You can go there. You can get bonus content. You can get bonus episodes of R U Garbage every week and get episodes of hard feelings every week, which is just me and Foley fucking shitting on each other a little bit behind the curtain. And then at the end of every month, we do a live stream with our top tier members. We you get to ask us questions.

We ask you questions. It's a good fucking time getting Bob, baby. Yeah, that is it. Next one's coming up right next week. I think excited. Can't wait. Shout out to our producer extraordinaire, the magic man. He puts it all together.

T bone Toby McMullin, everybody. Hey, what up there, fellas? Hey, T bone and gang. We could not be more excited to have our incredibly, incredibly, incredibly special guest here with us today. He's a great fucking pal of ours. He's a very funny standup comedian, writer, director, producer and podcaster. Okay. He's a writer for mostly for millennials.

He's been a writer for the F spot with Derek Beckles. He was the writer and producer for Danny's house on. What was that on vice? I believe vice TV. Yeah, pretty awesome. He has an album out right now called Funnymatic. It's available everywhere. And he's also the new host of the brand new podcast, top nine.

But the big question, but he's mine today. Is he garbage? And if there was an episode where I recommend going to get a box of tissues. Cause wait till you hear this tale. Whoa. Oh my Lord. Dang, do me a favor. Give me a nice big round of applause for my good pal.

Our good pal, Tom Cassidy. Everybody. Oh my Lord. It's so good to be here with two of my oldest friends in comedy. Happy to have you. I was stumbling on the intro here in the basement. Yeah. Your name is Tootie.

Tootie took care of me. I'm not nervous anymore. Gave me a little massage. Yeah. And Tooties would be a place where you would move into while your parents are working things out. Tooties always, Tooties always got a brown couch for you. Yeah.

Sleeping out on the sun porch. Smells like Bernie's. Tommy, thank you so much for coming in and sitting down with us. Oh my Lord. Thank you for having me. We want to hear the whole story. The origin story. Obviously we have bits and pieces.

We've been friends a long time. Go back since Moses wore short pants. That's right. Shout out to Uncle Junior. But what's the, what's the complete tale? You're a Roxboro kid. Roxboro trash. Let's get it out in the open.

I'm from an affluent neighborhood. It's the fucking end of the tracks. Okay. Fuckin' dead end. One way in, one way out, Roxboro. In Northwestern Philadelphia. The only neighborhood with a public bathroom. And no park.

What the fuck? We got Gorgias Park. What are you kidding me? Sounds beautiful. We got a nice monument. Gorgias Park. For the fallen soldiers. Sounds like you got exposed to radiation.

They got to put the asbestos somewhere, huh? That was very Rodney of you. Somewhere, huh? It's gonna be a fun one. I literally said, hey, let's have Tommy in this weekend's shit on him for an hour. Man, new podcast on. Come on, give it to me, baby.

He brought the costume for it. Shout out to Gumby for the onesie. I thought this was a good beef and beer outfit. You look like a superhero that's half dressed right now. You look like a gay Bazooka Joe. I got all black on them. Look at him. Tommy C.

Oh, it's so good to, you know, just mix it up with the place. We appreciate coming in. I think we did do a Patreon episode with you early on, probably about a while ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we do know some of the backstory. What you pitched about? Of Tommy.

What, that he was a patriot? That was also when we had like four people on the Patreon. In the big leagues now, baby. Thank you for wearing your fancy denim, by the way, as opposed to your white denim jacket that you have. Thank God it's not after Memorial Day yet. Tommy called me up after the Roan episode and was breaking my balls because I was very,

I distanced myself from the show that we were on with Roan. Yeah, I heard you. No, he was like, oh yeah, we all did a show together that Tom ran, me and Foley ran that show. Oh, he's on the flyer. Yeah, his fat face is on the flyer. And a life beater, if I recall. I think I called you Tim Cassidy, too.

Shout out to Tom Kinney, all right? Hey, what was that kid's name? That's a good kid, anyway. All right, so Rocksboro Kid. I have roots to Rocksboro as well. You know some of my family members. Played a little league baseball with Stevie Ryan. Yeah, shout out to the Roan.

Went to the movies with him. Got a hand job, too. Think we went to see Nutty Professor. Think it was one, maybe two. You remember that? I definitely went to the movies with Kevin's cousin, Steve Ryan. My whole times you're just once.

Say it again? Multiple times you're just once. I only recall the one time. My dad's whole family is from Rocksboro and still a lot of them still live there. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, Indians baseball. So we were on the same team.

21st Award. 21st and Ward? 21st Award is the district of where I am from. It sounds like it's in Katrina. Wait, yeah, what? What do you wait? There's like different districts in Philadelphia. So the 21st Award, it was like a baseball league.

21st Award. The word is award like an award. Award like a like a award. You lived in the 21st Award. To be honest with you, you know that you're asking me I'm not really positive. Either way, you're fucking trash. Pretty for it.

I just struck out. That's all I know. 21st Award, perhaps? Who tells people what district they lived in? Yeah, throw up. Hey, man. I'm just trying to be real specific. You asked me some questions.

Over there in Stevens district. I live over there. Well, the neighborhood was like different parts of the neighborhood. Different like baseball teams. Like I was on the Indians. Like Manny Yonk was like the Tigers and Dora was like the Orioles. So it was like all different. Panthers was Little Africa.

There was a neighborhood of my. I knew you were going to go race at some point with that. No, there was a neighborhood like in my neighborhood called Little Africa. I think it was just because like black people lived on the street. She was only a cultural. Five of them probably. Center. No.

Jesus. No, they came up with the name of the VFW. After a bunch of warm. Make a little. So go ahead. Well, you know, I went, like I said, to a private school all of my life. Holy family from first through eighth grade. Archbishop John Carroll 9th through 12th.

It's a Catholic school. You heard of that place? Yeah, main lines. Lane's got main lines. Got a little bit of cake. Buddy, stop trying to sell it like you were fucking drinking. I'm a fan of the show. Everybody kind of like tries to push their garbage.

I am garbage. So I'm trying to push my class. You know what I mean? Lead with Catholic school in Philadelphia. I don't really take it at a time. Your race is literally deep. You got to look through the people ever so slightly to get to that. Wait, your school wasn't in Philadelphia proper.

It was out on the main line. That's where you went every day in high school. I went to it was in Radner. It was in Radner. I didn't know that's a pretty nice area for folks. And did you have to do like you get that? Did you take public transportation? They send the bus to get now.

We had a yellow bus, baby. I would probably pick you up super early, right? Pretty early. I remember every time. 730. 730. I suppose I was starting at 9. What are you fucking?

Wall Street traders? I got to get in for the bell. Get some tips. Jeez. But yeah, man, Catholic school. I was just calling a private school to try to sound classy. Yeah, we got it. I picked up on it.

All right. And then the house that your family lives in now is at the house you grew up in because I've been to the outside of that. I picked you up there, I think. Bellmore Street? Yeah. Were you casing the joint? My parents were down Wildwood.

Sneaking through the back window. Caught me on the ring phone. I hear the Cassies are down the shore on Wildwood. Let me slide through and steal some meatloaf. One thing that struck me is odd. If I could just say of when I was in Cassie, there was a China cabinet in the living room. Yeah.

Still there. I sold to China. Yeah. It's got laundry in it. I grew up in the house that my mom grew up in. Is that the house that you're in now? I mean, I don't live there. They're still in there.

That's the house. Yeah. They live there. And they also have a summer home in North Wildwood. Which is also owned by Anglesey. Also very nice. Which house? I've been to that one a handful of times.

And also, I would throw you under the bus. Last time I was there, I went inside to use the bathroom. And there was a flat screen TV leaning against them. Leaning against the dining room table. Probably getting some work done in the house. I don't know. I don't want to call that. It's got rabbit ears on it.

Nothing on that? That should have gotten a lot better by my character. Wait, hold on. Go back to this thing. You grew up in the house that your mom grew up in. Correct. So at a certain point, your grandmother, either your parents shipped her off to a home

or something like that. How did your grandma, how did your mom get the house? Yeah. OK. So my mother's mother died when she was young. OK. Which is something that she talks about probably every conversation.

She sneaks it in. You know my mother passed you. She sneaks it in there. When mom passed. By the way, she's thinking about being a Patreon. Well, let's, all right, hold on. Let's put a pain in that. I want to bring this up.

Because Jeannie, shout out to Jeannie. For the record, we are very close with Tom and his family. We know his parents very well. I thought we were very close. Wait a minute, what? I thought she fucking hugs and kisses me when I see her. You know how these Irish Catholic people are, Kevin. I guess.

Probably gets on the pisser off. Which I think. So back in the day, we had a podcast with Tom called Center City Comedy and a couple of other of our buddies. I actually have all the episodes and I'm doing a Patreon. Anybody wants to jump on that. We had a podcast and Jeannie, Tom's mom, was a very big supporter of us.

Yes. I guess. We recorded at the shore house. We recorded at said shore house next to the flat screen TV on the ground. And I guess at some point, Jeannie had a beef with us and unfollowed our Instagram page. Really?

Yeah. Because we switched the Center City Comedy Instagram page to the Are You Garbage Instagram page. She's an emotional woman, Kevin. So she unfollows us, which I didn't know. Wait a minute, just not you, your personal page. But the podcast page, which is fair enough. I'll never listen again.

But then I don't know what happened, because we booked Tommy and 20 minutes later, Jeannie Tassidy follows, started following the Are You Garbage page. Put your fucking snakes in the grass away out. He must have got the call. Call Jeannie was like, hey, you can follow him again. Lift the band. I don't have anything to do with what that woman does online.

Are you kidding me? I'm not getting into that hornet's nest. She's also like, I love Jeannie. She's the kind of gal when I bump into her down the shore. I go, hey, you know, I'm not, it was the middle of the pandemic. I'm like, I ain't hugging. Fucking slops one on me real quick. Shut up, Goochie.

The old credit card swipe. No, she's a big fan of both of you. So is my father. Motorboach you on the boardwalk. By the way, also the last time I saw your dad was at Rest in Peace, the Chris Cotton funeral. But he just walked out to me. Holy shit, Foley's getting fat, huh?

Why he was wearing a leather vest, by the way. I just want to point that out. It matches the jacket. He was wearing a leather vest. Or he was wearing a leather jacket. Dual funeral. Either way. Good leather.

You were in sweatpants. What are you talking about? I was joggers. Foley had a wife beat her on. All right. So back to the house. So your mom's mom passes away when she's young. OK.

And then my grandfather passed away when I was like one or two. So I think he was there. And then I think he died. And then my mother, you know, took the house. It's still in the old broth name. I think my dad. I think my mom and my dad. Look at that state tax.

They're still collecting the Social Security, too. Got checks on a 15th adio, keep it moving. Oh, you just missed them. The investigation. We're going to talk to James Casley. Yeah, he went out to get milk again for the 15th time. They put baby powder in Tommy's hair. Tell him he's an old man.

What's that now? Tommy, put this blanket over your legs. But yeah, you know, he was a war veteran, rest in peace. We once read his correspondence from World War II on our old podcast. I think we might have. I think I remember that. My uncle got really mad at me for that, mad at the family.

But anyway, he was a war hero. God bless. Prisoner of war. Yeah. I feel like Tommy became autistic at some point during this podcast. During this podcast. But yeah, I mean, so my mom had a big family.

I think four brothers and sisters. My father is from the Delaware County area. Also had three sisters. Just a Delco kid meeting a Roxboro gal, if you know what I mean. Yeah, I believe they met in a bathroom at a bar. Wasn't the White House, I think. It was the Capitol building. It was the last Wednesday.

Tommy's whole family is down Delco, sharpening knives, listening to podcasts. There's going to be a couple of fucking dirtballs that are upset about this one. Yeah. All right, so what else? And what do you want to know? You've seen the show.

So brothers and sisters, you have a less traditional brother and sister. You have half brothers and sisters, I know that. Yes, less traditional. It's not nuclear in the sense of a nuclear family. I'm the same way. I'm the product of a second marriage. That's what you're asking.

That's what you're getting at. Yeah, a couple of wrong turns. You know, me and my brother and sister all came out of my mother. So I never really thought of them as my half brother and sister. But there was another guy before your dad. Correct. Nice. That's how that works.

Yeah. Do you know him? A little bit. Messages me on Facebook. I need money. I heard you do an AYG. I can follow him again now, huh? I was saying about joining a Patreon.

That's good stuff. But yeah, I mean, I don't have like a relationship with that man, really, but I love a fair spark up between you, your mom and your dad. Is that was that what happened with the first marriage? No, they and I'm not being disrespectful. I'm asking, you know, I love your mom and dad. Sure. But I love you, Jeannie.

They're watching. But I know I'm going to get messages after this. For sure. No, I think their marriage didn't work out. And then my father came probably soon after that because I know they were seeing each other before they, you know, had me and got married seven months before I was born or something like that. You have the shotguns clicking.

I know. I got. Call up Delis Andrews. We're throwing a party. Straight from the rectory to the fucking hospital. Squirt this kid out. I got engaged recently. Yeah, congratulations.

Thank you. And I asked my mom how she got engaged and she was like, I think I said that I was pregnant and he was like, OK, let's get married. Man, if that's not fucking blue collar, Philly, I don't know what. All right, the romance was in the air that night. I'm in the union. I got the bennies. Let's do it.

Uh huh. So yeah, there's that. I mean, you know, I got, I know a few different languages. I speak Spanish and French. You do not. No, you do not. I might, you might, you might speak kitchen Spanish. You don't speak French, Tommy.

We got us. No, I mean, you know, Roxborough is a neighborhood full of demons straight from hell. That's what I'm looking for. Give us the juice, Tomcat. I mean, it's how young when you started selling pills, screwing around. You got any on you like 10th grade. I think I gave it to some to Chris Cromie.

Rest in peace. Good kid from my high school who's dead. But I always thought he was a nice kid. Tommy's got a lot of that. The Cromie estate's going to be coming after us. The Cromie estate. Now he's a good kid. But I mean, you know, so I grew up in Roxborough.

I went to high school in a, you know, a nice neighborhood. So I mean, I had that I was exposed to, you know, the suburbs too. So it was both of those things. Yang and Yang, I think it's called. You know what I mean? Sure. Yeah. All right, let's play a little are you garbage?

All right, let's get into this. We're going to ask you a series of questions. Okay. To determine what we know. Do you honestly, do you think you're garbage? No, do you know you're garbage? I think that's a better question. I think it's all about perspective.

To be honest, I don't have a fucking lipstick on a pig. Have you catch my drift? It really is how you look at it. I mean, to some way, do you want the way I look at it is your trash. To some, absolutely. You were born with that hat on. I tried to wear, you know, represent Philadelphia, you know, I got the Eagles green.

I mean, some people would say so. Sure. But I don't want to just say I'm garbage right now. It's a top. Okay. Yeah. We'll find out how you live in there. Well, the shotgun wedding didn't do you any favors either.

I went to Europe in high school. All right, well, let's start off with that. I went to university. Let's start off with that. How old were you when you got your passport? I was like 15. That's pretty fucking good. It's not bad.

That's better than me. You went on a school trip to Europe. Yep. Where'd you go? I went to the works, baby. Two weeks in Europe. We went to, we started out. Perillo tours.

My mom's died. Did I tell you that? My mom was going on a Perillo tour. Shout out to Perillo. Yeah. She's like, I'll get the vaccine if I can go on a cruise. That's right. Essential health care workers and then the Perillo people.

Yeah. That's crazy. I got a bunch of mouth breathers that want to go to Rome. Taking a cruise right now. You got to be nuts. Yeah, that's crazy. We went to France. Then we went to Barcelona, Spain.

And then we went to parts of Italy. This is a school trip. Yeah. That's pretty, that's pretty impressive. Two weeks, pretty good. Fully went to a sock factory. Still got the socks. Free trip for school.

No, you got to pay. No, it wasn't free. Probably like two Gs, 15. Where'd you dig that money up? Something like that. My dad had it. A little slip and fall it after him. You know?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Why am I garbage? Hit three points. Hit three points.

I don't know what to tell you. I'm sure you were the last kid to pay to go. You were probably on the plane. She showed up to the airport with a check. Hey, don't cash us till we land. I was on a layaway program to get to Europe. Tom, he's at the jump seat in the cockpit. Your dad was probably, put him down below.

He don't need it. He don't need it. He don't need a soda on the ride over. He didn't need all that fancy oxygen. Get him in there. Pressurized cabin. Shit. His dad was the only parent asking for the cash price.

Now, do I get a 6% discount with this? That's pretty good. It's not bad. Hey, gang, want to take a quick second to talk about our new sponsor, Stamps.com. Let's face it, taking trips to the post office is probably not how you want to spend your time. It can be a hassle and tiresome.

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Damn, that's pretty good. I never did anything like that at the Folie House. It was this. You don't have a passport still. He took you to get some milk. Told you to shut up. Hey, Tubby, you just snickers and piped down with you. You're not going anywhere.

Split this twix with your brother. But it was the summer before 9-11. So it was right before that. It was a different time. It was wide open back then. Do whatever you wanted. Yeah, it really was. But I mean, it was a good trip.

Travel in the world, go to Europe at 15. That's pretty cool. That's your school keeping you. That's the school pushing you. Yeah, I got in trouble one day. I couldn't go to the French Riviera because there was guys bothering girls in our group. And we were eating.

And there was a glass window. And these guys were trying to come onto them. And I pointed my knife at them to tell them to get away. And then a teacher saw, and then I couldn't go to the beach the one day. What the fuck? You're sticking up for the group. Yeah, I know.

That's what I said. Bunch of French creeps coming up. Yeah, dude, that's how the French do it. Thanks a lot, Miss Pinoosie. Miss Pinoosie. Yeah, Miss Pinoosie, can I go to the bedroom? No, it wasn't her. She's just doing it.

Threatened people with a butter knife. That's great. Hey, listen here, you frog. Hit the bricks. Fucking give me a Roxborough handshake. Take it down, Delos Andrews. Give me a whiz win. A Roxborough handshake is pointing a butter knife

at someone. Oh, god. But so you know, it was a good time. I remember, I do remember my dad getting mad that my airplane was delayed. You didn't bring the soap back from the hotel. $3,000 I paid for this kid to flights delayed. Yeah, you had to wait for me a little bit.

I remember getting, uh. What do you mean? Picking you up. He yelled at me. He was like, what the f- He was mad that the plane was delayed. Coming back? So it was a dichotomy.

He sent me to Europe. But then he got mad at me because the plane was late. My mom, last night, trapped her. Well, I ain't paying for parking. He's just circling for four hours. This is an emotional time in my family being on AYG. You know, they've been separated from you guys for a little bit.

I heard from my mother last night. I heard from my dad today. They're like, they feel like they're here right now. Yeah, it's a big opportunity for all of the cast that needs to be on AYG. It really is. His mom's going to be at the fucking shop right later today. Now, when will our episode end?

Yeah. You heard Todd. She's going to be on television. My mom was emotional as shit last night. Why? She told me that, uh. She got a bad mozzarella stick or something. She was like, I feel really bad that we yelled a lot

when you were little. I was like, you're just realizing this now? And then she told me that she lit 15 candles down at the Basilica when I had my first interview for a writing job that I got. Oh, man. Lighting candles down at the Basilica. 15.

All the saints, Kippy. Not just at one little place. She went all over the fucking church. Patron saint of bozos. Patron saint of mediocre comics. Saint Marty. Dear Saint Marty, forgive me for I have said my son is a new job. Oh, my lord.

Oh, good. Hi. Saint Marty, Shane. Oh, man. All right, dude. So you know. All right. Our parents did yell a lot when they were kids.

But I see me and him went the other way. You went quieter. You're not like, we're the hotheads out of the three of us. Like you have a different personality than me and Foley. You're more reserved. You don't lose it. We matched that. You went the other way.

Tommy got hit harder. I think. Learned to spot. I don't know, man. Shut up, Tommy. He whets himself. I think sometimes I. He's under the coffee table.

What is this, a step mom porno? I'm stuck. Shout out to Stuckborn. Stuckborn. It's a big market. Those ladies keep dropping their rings in the garbage disposal. I get caught in the garage door.

I told you guys, you should flip these cameras just to this side and start shooting some of them. Make a little more extra money. That's a different kind of. Patreon's going off when you walked in. Tommy asked me if the insurance was paid on this place. Somewhere in South Jersey is a guy going, I invented Stuckborn.

And I ain't getting none of that kid. Stuckborn was cool. Yeah, I think I have a boiling point. But I think I don't reach it as much as I used to. I think I used to get more yelling back. But I don't know. Sometimes it comes out. But I mean, compared to you guys, I would say, probably not.

You're just more subdued. Yeah, we were just following in the past. To do the right thing, you went the other way. To be more common, more subdued. You won't yell at your kids the way our parents might have yelled at us. I hope not. I yell at Foley the way I would yell that for sure.

Oh yeah, I'm looking for it. He's brought it out in me, though. Oh yeah, no, no, of course. I'm just saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You have a higher boiling point than me and Fatty. You turn the other cheek off. OK, I'll take it.

Which is very respectful. I got another one for you. It's pretty classy. What'd you get on the internet? It is pretty classy. What'd you get on the SATs? It's interesting you say that. I am 1140.

Me too. Hit it. Hit it. You can tell us about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In my mind, I think I got a 1230 for some reason. When I lie, I think I say 1230, but I got an 1140. Did good on verbal.

Really? What was that hospital you were born at? Roxborough Memorial. OK. I could see you being a backseat kid on the way to the hospital or something like that. What do you mean? Like a bus being born.

Oh, yeah. My mom says, my grandpa who died when I was like one, he would always park out front of our house and drop off the milk before we would find a spot. And my mom said that he was the one who, for some reason, had me in the hospital. And he dropped me off from the hospital like a gallon of milk.

And they're back nursery rhymes. I think you got it. And since then, Tommy's been a little gallon of milk. Oh, my good. I never expired. A crazy old man dropped off the baby. What? I think you got half the story.

I think that was the orphanage you dropped me off. They traded you for a gallon of milk and something. Something's fucked up. Instead of a stork, it's an overwice delivery guy. What's the name of the supermarket Genie shops at? They did buy it. It's got to be Acme. Acme.

Got to be. Shop right. Super fresh? Wow. Yeah. She knows what she's doing. You kind of hit the trashy version. We never really brought up.

People in Philly can turn Acme into two syllables, the Acme. You kind of stumbled on the Acme. Acme. Well, my. Headed down to the Acme. Yeah. Well, my dad worked at the Acme warehouse down by where all the.

Braggen. Down by where all the sports is in South Philly. So that was his job that he had for many years working at Acme. So we were Acme in that sense. But my mom went to Super Fresh when they were on the outside, I guess. Dude, Genie plays a fight. So you don't fuck around.

If you cross Genie, she'll fucking cut ties with me. But they've done for me lately. Where the loyalties lie. But yeah, man. Super fresh. All legit. Shop right. Not too shabby.

Little of the road. Pretty good. And you know, Wawa, for sure, as well, you know. What do you mean? Love a Wawa. We got that big Wawa in Roxborough now. But there was the original Wawa when I popped off when I was like six or seven.

Wait, your mom wouldn't shop there, though. Steal from there. Nothing on there. Nothing on there. They're known to have a turkey bowl for dinner every now and then. Really? I love Wawa, man. We believe you.

He don't seem like a Michelin star kind of guy. I got the sweater from Wawa. Wait a minute. Hold on. OK. She wouldn't. No parent shops at the Wawa, the convenience store. It's not like she was getting like lunch meat from there

and stuff like that. Back in the day, we would. Back in the day, that was like a, you would order at the. No, generally not, though. No. Just grab something for dinner on the way home. Yeah, some milk. All right.

What's your go-to Wawa order? Me? I like an Italian. Just a little bit of weight. Fabricio? Like a meatball, too? You know, Italian cold meatball warm, baby. Too bad.

Yeah, it'd be weird if you were eating cold meatballs. That's for sure. Well, I wouldn't be surprised. What's your nickname in college? Shout out to cold meatball. Yo, guys, cold meatballs on the way. All right. Let's do this.

What do you got for him, big man? Do you have any members of your extended family? It doesn't matter who it is. That was any type of local magician, clown, or anything like that. No. I don't believe. I can't think of any local magicians or clowns in my family.

Any mummers in your family? No, I don't think any mummers either. I believe my father's father was like, he had some. I think he was like a dancer. I think he like dancing stuff. Chippendale? Shout out to the cave on Delaware Ave. He was like a tap dancer, I believe.

And like did stuff like that. I think my father's father was like someone who was somewhat in that world. The show business. A little bit, but he was a teacher. OK. Could have been that good. No, I guess not.

Have you ever worn Axe body spray? Briefly, I would say, and you know, college was a different time. They came on with a heavy marketing campaign that you were like, I got to give this a shot. Oh, yeah, it was covered up everything. Yeah. Fucking weed smell, pit smell, didn't matter.

I think we just have to come to the realization that when we were growing up, it was different. I think everything is like when entourage was on TV and when it wasn't. Like it was a different time back then. It was. It really was. So I mean, you can take it or leave it, but it was different.

Entourage reference, that's fucking true. Different time, man. That's how I base life off of when entourage was on TV and when it wasn't. Pre-Queen's Boulevard? Post-Queen's Boulevard. I am Henry Avenue. Then he chased in the boys.

Anybody in your family driving an Esuzu? Oh, man. They only existed in the commercial. Oh, those things. Azuzu Trooper was that what it was? Whatever the fucking was. The Azuzu Trooper. Yeah.

I think my Uncle Richie briefly dated an Azuzu. Man, an Uncle Richie. Yikes. Dude, if you got an Uncle Richie, there's no way he's married. He actually just got remarried, actually. Yeah, remarried. Shout out to remarried for Uncle Richie.

Hey, man, we're all pulling for him. Trash only used. Only trashy people use the term remarried. Yeah, I got remarried. Second marriage? That's how people would say it. I would just say got married. Yeah, people would just say got married.

Hey, I got remarried. Richie, Uncle. Shout out to Richie. What's he do? He's in. He works for Villanova. That was vague. Not in the engineering department.

More of a custodial position. No, no, no. Villanova's probably paid some bucks, though. Yeah, he's in computer shit. Stealing them? Yeah. Come on, nothing on the stealing again? You're killing me here.

Trying to peg these dirtballs down. What are you against with my Uncle Richie? You're nothing to nobody. Sounds like a nice guy. He didn't do nothing to nobody. Richie never hurt you. Take it easy, Mickey. Does anyone in your family refer to genes as dungarees?

No, I don't think so. My dad is big on the dungarees. What about referring to pants as slacks? I don't believe so, no. We're still, we're a big dungarees and slacks family. Oh, yeah. We're just happy when my dad puts them on. Doesn't matter what you call it.

My mom used to call something. I don't know if it was pants or jeans, but they were called chinos. Yeah, perichinos. What's chinos? Chino is, I think, a cut. The brand, I believe. Nah, because, like, it might have been a brand at one point,

but I think it was like a type of khaki, like a perichinos. OK. Yeah. You can't fit in them one way, really. I don't know what they are. I just know you can't wear them. I got a quick one. Have you ever used the phrase, that's how they get you?

And if you have, what is it that is how they get you? You know, I think the further I get away from Philadelphia, I feel like longer I've not lived there. I think I did say stuff like that, that's how they get you. Probably like a cop pulling you over for a DUI or something like that. You say God bless a lot, I noticed that. I do say God bless.

When you hang out, God bless. So, like, I have two nephews as well, and my brother has a child. A couple of lookers, by the way. One kid's got a body on him. He's scrolling through that Instagram the other day. Kid works out. He's a boxer, an MMA fighter or something.

He would fuck you up, Tommy. Oh, they both would. He would kill all of us. Whatever, he's not my nephew. I'm just a guy on the street. I treat him like a Pokemon. He's got too much of a drink in his mouth. I ain't at Christmas.

He can work you next to the fucking tree. I'll take my lumps on Chestnut Street. Like a gentleman. He's flexing on you with things. Shut up, Tommy. That's funny. No, my nephew, Ryan, who is the other one who's another hot piece of ass.

Good looking kids. Oh, my god. Like butter. But he says stuff like that's a sin. So, like, that's like such a. That's that Catholic. That's that Irish Catholic. He's like a 21-year-old kid.

God bless. He's saying that's a sin. What does he? It sounds like something Aunt Tootie'd say. And does. That's a sin. So, I mean, there's definitely that level. Ever have seasoned tickets to G League basketball

or AAA baseball, anything like that? You ever go to the minors? No. Trenton Thunder? No. I mean, I went to a lot of sporting events growing up, but we would usually scalp tickets. Dad, can we get tickets beforehand?

Nah, nah, that's how they get you, Tommy. First, we got to find pocket. Yeah, we scalp a lot of tickets. Really? But yo, I mean, I saw some. You would go down to a game with your family. With probably just me and my dad, or like me and my dad and my friend, or something like that.

You kids wait here. I'm going to go get tickets. No, he'd bring us with him. What, he wouldn't wait up with us on the corner. Go for the sympathy price. Tommy, start crying. Tell one of you to start limping. Please, Sharron, why don't you see Randall Cunningham?

But yeah, you know. Mike Schmitch playing today. We'd roll through probably like first or second inning. You know what I mean? While the game was already started. But yo, I've seen some great games. Sneaking through the sewers. I would.

Tommy, hold your breath. Ocean's 11. Cassidy's 3. Sneaking in the bowels of the vet. Wait, hold on. I assume that your dad would be the kind of guy to pay for one seat and then try to push his luck to get you down to the closest possible.

He was a. He was a shifty man. Oh, he's looking for a bargain. He's a grifter. That's really what it is. You're from a family of grifters. All of you, the whole lot of you. Perhaps.

None of them were shooting you straight. Gina gave me, Gina gave me a hug. She took my wallet. It's like a pack of gypsies over here. That's what I've been trying to get at for the last 37 minutes. I can pull in teeth with this guy. Go back to your shanties. He definitely was looking for a deal all the time.

They were drinking snake bites. You're watching the game. He's setting up three card Monty by the nachos. Like, I feel like we would. It's like a Magner's Cider on the front porch. Rascal. That's why I was a little hesitant at first. I knew we'd get here eventually.

You want to give it all away in the first five minutes. Tommy was playing prevent defense. People all she's going out the door. Let's go. Get to the dirt. The nickel. He would always just try to save money in any way that he could.

So I feel like even when he didn't work at Acme Warehouse, we would park there. So we didn't have to. I know the security guard. It's all right. But to be fair, there was. How close was it to the stadium? It's about two miles.

Man, it wasn't too bad. It was probably, you know, it was a walk, but it wasn't too bad. It's in the same neighborhood, but it's a hike. Probably like a 12-minute walk, something like that. But there's always be like a reasoning, like, well, now we don't have to wait for the, like, get caught in like the traffic of the parking. Oh, yeah.

There's always reasoning behind everything, you know? Sure. I saw some great games, man. I was at the Sixers game where Alan Iverson crossed over Michael Jordan. That's one of the greatest Philadelphia sporting events. I know the Bleachers, but still. We were up there, but it was still, you know.

You guys posted as maintenance men in the fucking camera booth. Tommy's got a fake mustache and only six. Hey, we're here to check the boiler. Tommy, put a tool belt on. Act like you're in a union. Let's go. Here's this broom just sweeping place. Tommy, you can get anywhere with a clipboard.

I swear to God. Clipboard in a fucking hard hat. You know, there's a, you know, we'd be there. Dress like the fucking YMCA. The what? I'm trying to, who's the, who's sung YMCA? The village people. The village people.

I got this song and not the group. They all show up as different occupations. I'm an Indian. My dad's a cop. I just take Tommy's in handcuffs. His dad's actually he's arrested them. I got to bring this punk down in the basement. I caught this scalper.

Now that's a deep cut. Come on. It's pretty good. OK. I don't know how we got there, but we got there nonetheless. Fucking three-card Monty all the time. Probably can't trust anybody in that. Fucking guns out, knives.

We're a slight a hand family. You all got razor blades on their hats? Instead of taking off your shoes when you walk in the house, you got to empty your pockets. No blades, no bows. Check your weapons here. We got Norton's in this town. No firearms in the living room.

Make sure you go through the metal detector. You hit the rumpus room, kids. We're having fun. Now we're cooking, baby. Ever go to the liquor store with the specific reason of asking for boxes? No. Dude, that's so funny.

You bring that up. That's right out of the fucking Patty Foley handbook. Yeah, dude, go to that and like the Acme. You got any boxes? My aunt, who's like she was an executive for a very big company very well that she was moving it. She asked my brother to help her. And she's like, well, can you go try to find some boxes?

My brother's like, I'll buy the fucking boxes, lady. I'm not going to the store to ask some shmuck for boxes. You're loaded. What are we doing here? Yeah. That's real trashy. Because Kippy, your family is a drinking family. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You've heard correct. Word on the street? Yep, all reports are true. Reputation proceeds and sales revenue. They weren't that big of drinkers. That wasn't really, you know, you know, my mom definitely had some screwdrivers.

So that was her drink was a screwdriver? Get a little loose lift. Get smacked around a little bit. Start running her mouth about Uncle Richie on the phone. But they weren't like big drinkers, really, no. Yeah, no, you don't have to be a big drinker to go to the liquor store to get boxes. You've got to be trashed.

I wasn't thinking they were picking up a bottle of fucking reunite on ice. Oh, I guess I just think of people who go to the liquor store for things that aren't liquor to probably also be alcohol. True, yeah, yeah, yeah. I figured they're getting the boxes so they can also get a bottle of vodka as well.

Okay, good argument. Have you ever saved a cigar box for storage? That's a real, do you open up someone's like top drawer? There's a cigar box with like, you know, a pocket knife, some euros or something, foreign money. There's always a patch in there too, a nice patch. A necklace from like the 80s. Yeah.

I think I was given one, like a lion one, because I'm a Leo. Oh, okay. So yeah, I did have one of those. I don't have it anymore, but yeah, probably out of college, out of a lion cigar case. That was a big like first place you get on your own. You got a cigar box in your room,

like on the nightstand with condoms and trinkets. Keep all your stuff and keep your weed in there. Keep your lube in there. Have you ever done a shot out of a shot glass that was attached to a beaded necklace? Probably in college, yeah, absolutely. What about one of those boards? I see people doing shots on those boards.

Oh, we're like everybody does it? Yeah. Yeah, that's like real, that's real party shit. That's trash. Yeah, if so, maybe it was. I mean, when you're partying, whatever, if you're fucked up and you're just trying to get more fucked up, I don't care what you're taking.

Again, on Taraji's own TV, it's 2006, you know? Sure. It's a magazine. You ever do a Maxim magazine? I think I had the one hot like Lindsay Lohan Maxim cover on like my wall in college. Yeah, that's another, that's a question I've had on the list. Have you ever cut stuff out of a magazine

and put on your wall? Yeah. Real dirtball shit. I definitely did that in college. I did it in high school. Shout out to Terry Hatcher. Woo! Oh, man.

Went desperate housewives dropped. Loves her. I also love Jamie Lee Curtis. They're real and they're spectacular. Ha ha, deep gut. By the way, people love the deep cut Seinfeld references. Yeah? Yeah.

Excellent. Good show. Hey, readjust, relax. Oh, you went in the fucking daytime host right there. Yeah, okay, great. Moving on. Tommy stink on me. I don't know what it is.

By the way, whatever window or something. Whatever meat you ate before is coming out of your pores. That dog food that he had, the calcality. I'm catching whiffs of Kobe beef or whatever. You tell me I got to eat right. I eat right. Now you're complaining. Yeah, I didn't eat right before the podcast.

Well, I need to keep on my meal track. Otherwise, my blood sugar gets low and then I'm all loofy and goofy. Here we go. I think you could spare to lose a meal or two. Yeah. Tommy, let me ask you this. Please.

Now, this covers any member of your family. I don't care who it is. It's your fucking mom, your dad. If it's a cousin, you see once a year. Have any of you casities? We're wax. That's another thing. That's a good.

Wait, what? My mom's maiden name is Wack. I knew that. Shout out to Jeannie. Yeah. I knew that too. Also, there was a weird thing at a time where you two might be related.

Yes, my grandfather. That was quelled very, very quickly. What do you mean quelled? By my parents' lawyers. Squash that real quick. Oh, my God. Jacobi and Meyer? They're splitting up a fucking above ground pool 12 ways.

Uncle Richie's coming over in the summer. He's swimming in the club fully. So that's enough for Uncle Richie, OK? He's going to get pissed. The man's been through enough. No, on my mother's side, her father, on his aunt's deathbed, she told him that his mother had an affair with a foley. I fucking shiced her.

Fat guy, short hair, cool jean jacket. So there's a possibility that he had a foley or. That's a very trashy thing. Deathbed confessions. Oh, yeah. Of an affair with a foley? Tell me about it. I'll have a couple waiting.

I skipped a couple meals when I found that out. Dude, an affair with a foley, you fucking, you take that to the grave. We don't let that thing out of the bag. I found out about that. It's like the scene in Crying Game. Crying in the shower. If I need a blood transfusion, I'll give you a call.

Any of your family members ever appear on Antiques Roadshow? Trying to hawk an old vase or something. Trying to hawk an old football phone. Here we have Steven Wack. Here we got a 42-year-old dirt ball. With a Garfield alarm clock. Check the date on this. My aunt Donna has her entire house, I believe,

is filled with just knick-knacks. I don't think you can move without a knick-knack. Stepping on a knick-knack. Yeah, knick-knacks go to a point where it's too much. She's got a lot of knick-knacks. What was your question before that? Thank you, Tommy. I'm sorry to ask you, I apologize.

No, I appreciate it. Have you or any member of your family ever appeared on the local news? For any reason at all. I was on Dino Fest, I believe, in 1997. I'm sorry? Dino Fest. What's that?

It was like a dinosaur exhibit of bones and stuff. And they interviewed me. It was my first television credit. Saw your teeth. It's funny, it was great timing and rhythm, but I don't get the joke. Teeth stinks. That's what I'm jacked up.

They were dinosaurs? OK. wasn't Jeannie was just on the news not too long ago. My mother and my father, I believe my uncle Richie as well, they were posting it like they did the Ten-Eye show. They here in the green room, just the parking lot. Talked to local wacko. They were on the local news for.

Here we have three local bozos. They're going to tell us exactly what they saw. They were at. They were blaming each other for the crime. I was sitting here having a screwdriver. Oh, mind the bio business. He's yelling at me. Look, look, look, look.

Finally, I turn around and say shut the hell up. I'm having a drink. Jeannie's going to get so pissed at this. The real reason why I am trash is that all of my parents are going to watch this and bitch at me. Sure. A lot of people's parents that do the show aren't going to watch this shit or care what the fuck they

say on a content podcast. I'm going to hear about this shit. That's what makes it so much funner because it's like danger. We're making fun of it. We're shitting on Jeannie. I love Jeannie. I want to see her. She's a sweet girl.

Classy lady down the hall. Hey, I love my parents. Back to the local news stuff. They were featured on a guest starring role ABC. No, they were at the Villanova championship basketball parade, I think. They sneak into that. I mean, it was on the street.

What was that grift? They're all dressed up like a sitting juice. Listen up. I swear to God, I was a water boy. They're watching from a tree like angels in the outfield? No, I'll have you know that my father attended Villanova University. Thank you very much.

A work release program. Next question. Wait, what was it? Yeah, tell us about the local news. I remember because I remember her posting it on Facebook. Oh, and they won the championship. They were at the parade for Villanova. I don't know.

They were in a good time. They found the cameras. Couple of choices. Yeah. He thought it was girls gone wild. Have your parents ever attended a parade? They love a good parade, man. They love parades, for sure.

St. Patrick's Day parade. If I know where the candy, they throw out. It's never a parade guy. Oh, parades. Love a good parade. No. When the Phillies won, come on. No, I was OK.

Yeah, I stay away from those. I was perfect timed. I was 21, the fucking year. Sure. You get a school bag full of beers, put a 30 pack in a school bag, and just fucking go out boozing. I meant like a proper parade. I always thought they sucked.

I'm not going to the 4th of July parade or something. They were brutal. Because I always wanted. Give me a sixer and a fucking Roman candle and call tonight. He always makes you up for the Garfield flow. He's off his strings. Shoot him. Three Shriners are chasing me.

He's coming right toward us. That Garfield flow is coughing. They used to go around with that shopping cart that had all those toys in it, remember? Like they would collect toys. They were like blow up toys. Do you guys know what I'm talking about? Yeah, the hammer and the baseball bat.

Yeah, I used to. I see that I'd go nuts. Oh, yeah, of course. Would never let me fuck. I couldn't go near that thing. The difference between me and you is I got whatever I wanted off that thing. My dad would be like $50.

I'll shut him up for an hour and keep it moving. You can have whatever you want. Sit there and have his marb reds and peas. You got a BB gun in there? You got a BB gun in a dinner roll to shut this fat little bastard up? Don't stop asking questions. I'm not even sure if he's mine.

OK. Good stuff. Tommy, do you prefer cocoa puffs or cocoa pebbles? Because there's a right answer here. I'm going to go cocoa pebbles. My man. Good job, buddy. I prefer fruity, though, to be honest with you.

Ever appeared on a company website for any reason? Have I? Yeah, like a picture of you working or anything like that? Yeah, I believe my one job out of college, I worked at a place called Compass North Realty, where I was a property manager for temple students. I got a question about that job. And section eight tenants and stuff,

I had like 400 tenants that I was in a contact to. I believe I was on section eight there real quick, didn't you? Hey, listen, they were something else. But you're trying to make it sound like you were the CEO of Maryland? No, I was just saying the job that I had. But I was on that. Fair enough, I apologize.

This is from a patron. We always do a couple of Patreon questions. And since you're talking about that, this is from Ben. He asked me because he goes to the temple. He knows I went to temple. He said, were you a Maxis or a draft horse kind of guy? Hey, Ben, thanks for the question. It was more directed to me, but I was passing it off to you.

Take it easy, Frazier. I get them a little mixed up, but I think Maxis. Maxis was the pizza place on only a course. Right next to the 7-Eleven. And the draft horse was, draft horse used to have dollar beers that you could use your diamond like your campus box. Draft horse was like the bar.

Yeah, the proper bar and restaurant. Yeah, I thought that was nice. I was a good time. Definitely took a few interns there. Oh, yeah. And I like both of them for different reasons. I think I got the buffalo chicken at Maxis. The buffalo chicken slice at Maxis

was a fucking game changer. Shout out. I mean, the cheesesteak. Oh, that was good. Sandwich was pretty good. And draft horse was good too, yeah. Both. Shout out to Benny, T.U., baby.

Gone to my head, I'm going Maxis. My man, all right. Let's talk about this. Let's talk about now. Let's see if the upbringing, nature versus nurture, what you're like now. Where do you go to the grocery store now? I go to the grocery store across the street from me,

from my house. I think it's just a neighborhood grocery store. What's it called? I don't even know. Associated or probably something like that. It's not good. No names. It's a fresh grocer.

I don't fucking know. How old were you when you stopped going to the pediatrician? Were you like one of those kids that went to the 20s? You're supposed to stop going. I used to go to the pediatrician when I could drive, by the way. Yo, I went up until college. Shout out to Dr. Rogers. I don't have a doctor now, because my last doctor

was, shout out to Dr. Endo. Your last doctor's your pediatrician? Yeah. I feel like I stopped going to my pediatrician when I was like 18, probably. I believe. Fair enough. Fair enough.

I also feel like my doctor was just, when I was growing up, was just a doctor. I don't believe it was a pediatrician. I don't think I ever had a child doctor. You had to have. So where were you going to fucking? I feel like my mom went to the same doctor. Really?

Good pap smear. Tommy's legs up in the stirrups. Get that tight butthole. Do you currently owe anybody any money? No. I mean, besides like credit card debt, but not too much of that. Doing OK.

We don't got to fucking open the books like that, do we? Jesus Christ. Toby, cut that. I got a couple of bucks on the street. Yeah, what do you want from me? No, no, I don't. OK. Foley owed me, I think, $300 once for, I think, three years.

Yeah, it was about three years. Did you pay them back? Yeah. Oh, look at that. Eventually got it. No big. Settled with my debt collector. Gave him $222.

I used to have a joke about it. He's like, you don't need it right now. That's what he used to say. When you need it, I'll give it to you. Which is like he was waiting for my life to fall apart to give me the $300 you learned. We've seen the bit. I just remembered it.

It's been a while since I told that joke. It's old school. But OK, no debts. Anyone in your family ever own a non-working car? Had to have been a car parked out on the street. Yeah, definitely. I think my dad had a Mustang. I mean, it was a pretty nice car.

But I mean, it definitely went in and out. Do you remember what year the Mustang was? I believe it was in 1995, Henry. That was a good year. No, but that's really true. That was like. It was a while ago, though, when he had it. It wasn't like an antique.

It wasn't like he had a 66 Mustang that he was. Yeah, but they were the new bodies that came out. It was kind of like a special series. Do you remember when it was parked and didn't work? No. I mean, out of college. So what year are we talking? I feel like the more we talk about this,

the more my accent is coming out, like out of college. Yeah, out of college. I don't even talk like that. Yeah, hide that trash. Comes oozing out. But yeah, I don't know. 2010, 2011. What are you, a detective?

Well, I'm just saying, a 50-year talking about how great the car is, it's 15 years. He just said it was great. He didn't compare it to a fucking GTO or something. He was just like, it was a nice car. Wait, what year are you saying? 2008? Hey, listen, you don't even have a car.

Why does it matter when it was fucking? I don't know. At some point, it was not running. But it was like an antique, almost. It was 20 years old. Can I talk to you for a minute? I don't know what you're not wrapping your head around here. What's going on here?

It was an older Mustang. He was trying to fix up. At 95, this is an older Mustang. That's my point. I believe when he got it at the time, it wasn't too old. It was still OK, you know? All right, you say so. Mustang, folks.

Growing up, disposable plates. Were you guys a paper or styrofoam household? You peg me. I peg you as a styrofoam. Yeah. I feel like this is the question that drives me to insanity. Like thinking about something horrible happening with a styrofoam plate right now.

Your dad would paint your mom with a stack of 500 or something. You dumb bro. I think we're paper, though, to be honest with you. Now, would you use those for holidays and stuff? Or would you use the real plates and nice china for holidays? What the fuck do you think we had the china closet for? Old laundry. Hockey pucks were in there.

But I think we used it more for parties. I think generally, like maybe if we got like pizza, we'd use paper plates. But generally, we use plate plates for dinner. That's how trashy is. They call them plate plates. You know, like a plate plate. No dishwasher.

I don't think I've ever had a dishwasher. Really? I thought there was a dishwasher. One of the times that I was at your house, OK, there was a washing machine or a dishwasher on the front porch. It wasn't a dishwasher. I swear to God, listen, I'm not trying to be funny. I swear to God.

Why start now? Your dad was redoing the kitchen. OK. Along with the Mustang. He was putting a dishwasher in the Mustang. It was probably the Mustang seats in the kitchen. It was probably a washer and dryer, to be honest with you. They just got a new washer and dryer.

Shout out. Yeah, there you go. Whirlpool, baby. Ooh. Big whirlpool. Have you or any of your family members gotten to a fight at a Little League game? I believe my father was not allowed

to go to some of my Little League games because he would argue with my coach. I believe he was ejected from at least one game. He was also coached. He coached for a couple of years, too. But he didn't coach you, right? He coached me. Oh, he did?

Yeah. We won a championship in Fall Ball once. Because I always thought it was 21st award. I always thought it was strange. No, Fall Ball could be. Pick it easy. I always thought it was strange that dad that coached but didn't coach his kids.

Yeah, that's weird. Yeah. Some pedophile shit. Maybe he's trying to get back to the community. Yeah, I know my dad coached with his buddy, but his buddy's kid was on the team. We were already aged out. It's just a weird thing to be a coach and your child's

not on the team for children. You miss the boat, buddy. If you want to coach, have a kid. Yeah, what are you doing? My kid can't handle my style. I would like to jump back real quick a couple questions about the washer and dryer. If memory serves.

We need to clean a blanket. What room is the washer and dryer in the house? I believe it's in the kitchen, if I remember. Oh, really? Do you want to get the blueprint out when you were casing it? There's no blueprints for that house. I think didn't go get permits. We didn't pull any permits on that one.

That was done freehand. Now, the kitchen's in the. That was piece by piece. The kitchen's in the back, and then there's like a little laundry room on the side. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn't being disrespectful. I love how you're saying that now,

if you shit on his mom and his uncle for fucking 15 minutes. I did. You did. Yeah, I'm not trying to be respectful. You're coming to Toadies, you're getting to eat. What do you want from me? I mean, I'm going to have to hug his mom and tell her it was all for comedy.

Do what you've got to do, all right? Baby, let's get these views up, huh? Scandals and animals. Fucking Uncle Bob touched me. Let's get a few more views, huh? All right, you can go do your paper plate. Let's see, let's see, let's see. What was the longest you ever went without going to the dentist?

I feel like I went growing up, but I mean, I did need braces, and they never, I mean, I think they probably asked me. I think they were like, do you want braces? And I was like, no. And they were like, OK. Dodge that $2,000 bullet. I think that's what you don't want. Give one to my kid one, you know.

Same thing with his appendix. Does it hurt so bad you got to get it taken out? Nah, I'm all right. Yeah, kids fine, let's go. Walk it off. Just go sneak into a Phillies game. Put this exterminator out, hold on. Hey kid, you know how to drive a Zamboni?

Nothing wrong. Now stop crying. You want to see the flyers or what? Nothing wrong with supporting the urban community and catching a ball game while you're at it. Listen. But I went to the dentist, but you know. When was the last you go now, currently?

Because I went like a decade without going. Yeah, I haven't been to the dentist more than that shit probably 20 years. Yeah, I went to the dentist, I think, like right before the pandemic. OK, that's not bad. What did they say? I had a few cavities.

I didn't get them filled. But yeah, you know, take care of your teeth. You ever think about getting braces? You know, to be honest with you, I am thinking about getting a Vizaline. Yeah, why not? It's like you can finance it. It's like fucking $1,200 or something.

Does it work? Yeah. What the fuck is that? What is this? Is this a commercial for a Vizaline? I don't know. I think you use promo code Garbage, everybody. How does it work, Tom?

Well, first you steal it from somebody. But so yeah. OK. I got a couple from the Patreon. As you know, when you sign up for Patreon, we will ask one of your garbage questions. It's just kind of one way to guarantee us asking your questions, just because we get so many requests

each week. So when you sign up, we will answer your question. This is from Eddie. Have you ever had to share a bedroom with a grandparent? Which is a home run of a question, Biggie. Oh, that comes from that guy's life. Yeah, that's a good one. Or an uncle.

You know, we can extend it, obviously, an uncle or something or an aunt. No. Down at the shore house in Wyattwood, I feel like. Down the shore is definitely a little bit. No, I know. So my mom and dad had a bedroom, and then I had a bedroom, and then my grandma had a bedroom.

So there was that aspect of it. So no. How come your sister and your brother didn't have a bedroom, just out of curiosity? I mean, I guess mine was theirs. They were older? Yeah. But I mean, that's just how I refer to it in my mind.

But when my sister was pregnant, we shared a room together, and it was a bunk bed. So my sister. Sleeping in a bunk bed while you're pregnant is not a good look. So I don't think it was like for the whole pregnancy, but there was definitely like a couple of months in there where she was on the bottom bunk, and I was on the top bunk.

And I was always worried that I would wake, because I sleepwalked when I was a kid, and I was always worried that I would like. He's choking her out. Yeah. Killed my little baby fetus nephew. But yeah, so that's pretty bad. Tell me about the sleepwalking.

Well, that's a tough one. There was one time where I walked out into the street, and a car was coming, and my dad stopped me right before I walked into the street. Why was he in the street? Get away from the Mustang. He heard me, so they knew I streetwalked. They knew I was a hooker.

They knew I was turning tricks, so they'd always hear for me. No, they knew I sleepwalked. So there was lights on in your room? They heard me walking down the steps. They heard the door open to the exterior of my house, and I walked outside. I think this was like in high school, probably around the time my sister was pregnant.

Cool kid. Talk about playing it cool. I don't sleepwalk anymore, so that's good. Get trying to run away in the middle of his fucking sleep. So I almost got hit by a car sleepwalking, but yeah. All right, I got one or two more here. Just got to wrap up. It's leaning towards trash.

Leaning? I know. It's so funny that I had a goal of trying to not. Yeah, you came in here. I went to private school, so you got kicked out of public. You went to Catholic school, didn't pay full fare, I would assume. I might have worked in the rectory.

What's it to you? That was great school. My family did that, like, my aunt got a job as a secretary at the prep, so all the kids could go there for three years. All right, this is from Colin. Did your shower get extremely hot or extremely cold when someone flushed the toilet?

Colin, that's a great question. Mine turns off when someone flushes the toilet. I swear to God, the shower stopped. Yours turns to shit. Cold, definitely. Yeah, it would go cold. Yeah. Yours went hot.

Shoddy plumbing. Is that what it is? Is that what it comes down to? It's just like bad water. Yeah, I guess. I mean, well, it's not an electricity issue. I know that much. A brother's a plumber.

690 guy? Union guy? No. Next question. Scab. I think he did just. Tommy's got line crossers in the family. He is.

Fucking Russell Buffalino. Your uncle is an inflatable rat. I heard you pay in houses. All right, let's do one. A lot of pipes are missing. It's supposed to be like that. Where's all the copper? 5 cents to 3 inch.

All right, this is from Will. We kind of touched on this at the beginning. Have you ever ordered a beer tube at a bar? Oh, God. Because you think you're real cool when you do. Again, man, different times. College, for sure. College was, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, absolutely. Because they dropped when we were in college. Because we're the same age. They dropped when we were in college. This thing that looks like a bong that has a spick at the end. Yeah, it's like it has like eight beers in it. It's like two pitchers or something. I remember when those dropped my buddy at the bar

being like, whoa, hang on, hang on, and pulling out the calculator on us. Oh, yeah. And being like, nah, they're ripping us off. Yeah, you're paying for the fucking sizzle. I always thought a pitcher you were getting ripped off too. No, pitchers are the way to go. I never trusted a pitcher.

Yeah, pitchers are great. Dude, pitchers to the dome, good, great. Really? It's never a pitcher guy. Yeah, they ask you how many glasses you need. I'm like, I'm going to get a pitcher, like whatever was the cheat, like Coors Light or whatever. They're like, how many glasses you need?

I'm like, just one, Daddy. Oh, really? OK, drinking one of yourself. How much? At a table or just like, keep the pitchers coming. How much is a pitcher? 8, 9 bucks, 10 bucks, probably. Unless you're in a real dirtball fucking bar,

and they give you the pitcher, and they don't give you any glasses. Because they know that you're going straight off the pitch. I've done that for sure. They never clean those. In that Bud Light pitcher that's, oh, he has a spout on it? Oh, yeah. That plastic pitcher, the clear one

that was always, like, amping and shattering? Yeah, big fan. Yeah, Jake Spar and Wes Chester, you said. They had the Nickel Beers or whatever. Knockback pitchers there, and then when I wanted to get classy, I'd go down the landmark, and I'd get one of the towers that we're talking about. If you think beer towers are classy, you're trash, so.

The towers were for the weekend. The pitchers were for the week, baby. I got a stun on the weekends. Well, I think I have all the information I need to render a decision. Yes, 100% grade A with onions. Roxbarrow trash. Gerbage.

Yeah. But you knew that. This was just fun. I am what I am. We love you. We know you. We know your garbage. We're garbage.

Yeah. You got a brand new podcast coming out called Top 9 with Anthony Moore. Top 9 podcast with Anthony Moore. Me and Anthony. It's going to be weekly. It should come out this week. I don't know when this comes out.

So it should be out when you hear this. But we have guests on. And they give us their Top 9 lists in anything. Instead of Top 10, it's Top 9. Top 9, baby. Number 9, baseball, Indians. That was my number. So you guys are free.

The Roxbarrow Races. Come on down. Did you say the Roxbarrow Races? Top 9 podcast. Tom Cassie and Anthony Moore. Kip, what do you got for him? Guys, thank you so much. As always, please make sure you rate, review,

subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. And then again, like I said, patreon.com. You sign up. We'll ask you a question. You get a lot of bonus content. And you help support the fucking show. It's just me and Foley.

Ain't nobody giving us no fucking handouts over you. You know what I mean? Me, Foley, and T-Bone. Shout out to T-Bone. Love you, T-Bone. Guys, at Cameron Comedy on all social media. Hi, it's Foley on Ice on Twitter. Foley Graham's on Instagram to reiterate what Kevin says.

Thank you very much, Tommy. Thank you so much for coming in and sitting down. Thank you, Tom Cass. Thank you so much for having me. I know it was a little heavy-handed at times. It gave you a little bit of, you know what I mean? I've been thinking about this all week, giggling about me and you, us three sitting here,

chopping it up. Well, it was great to be here at the base, man. Thank you for having me. Shout out to Tody. And we love you guys, and we will see you next week. Peace.