Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Tony Hinchcliffe: Mob Kid

Episode Date: November 2, 2020

Kippy and Foley are back with a truly special episode featuring Tony Hinchcliffe. Tony talks his family being connected in the mob, Italian food, and stand up comedy. You know Tony from Kill Tony Podcast, Joe Rogan, Netflix, and Roast Battle.  Bonus episodes: www.Patreon.com/AreYouGarbage Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

hey what's up everybody quick reminder our patreon is up and running go to patreon.com slash are you garbage you can sign up for bonus episodes every week we're gonna be doing videos live streams with you guys the listeners it's gonna be a good time patreon.com slash are you garbage sign up today also every episode of are you garbage we have every recorded is now available for download everywhere for free you can go to iTunes or YouTube the videos there we have I mean we're talking Mark Norman Joe List Bobby Kelly Ari Shafir Dan Soder Shane Gillis Paul Verzi and Drew Schultz everybody so go check it out

on iTunes Spotify Stitcher wherever you listen also full video available on YouTube you can subscribe there as well Peace. Welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast this is are you garbage the show we sit down with your favorite comedians in front of the group classy

or if they're absolute trash I'm your host they truly coming at you on a beautiful fall day here in New York City from gas digital studios in the big studio could not be more excited here in the East Village my co-host coming at you from right fucking next to me he's white knuckle in it right now he's got something stewing in him he's burying some emotions down I could die it at this kids ready to blow but gang you know the drill the next time you're reaching for a best pal you go ahead and make it a kippy give it up for my best friend in the world I love you buddy you set me up for something I don't fucking like this

Kevin James Ryan gang hey what's up everybody thanks so much for tuning in as always please make sure you rate review subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube you can subscribe there as well and also www.patreon.com.org garbage yes sir check it out we're on our own we could not be more excited to have our incredibly incredibly incredibly special baby get he's a fucking huge get he's tuning in all the way from the coast via 5g satellite technology brought to you by gas digital studios he is a very successful stand-up comedian writer podcaster and actor you've seen him in crashing he's written

on the burn with Jeff Ross he's written on the roast of James Franco Justin Bieber Rob Lowe and the fucking King Bruce Willis you've seen him on roast battle he worked on Brody Stevens enjoying it you seen him on last call with Carson daily at midnight to Joe Rogan experience he has his own special out called one shot and of course the incredibly successful host of kill Tony gang do me a favor give it up for the kid the one the only Tony inch cliff everybody look at fucking home studio fucking things on the wall this guy's successful that's it this is it this is as big as success gets I mean

you've got the old AM radio mic right there you look like you're calling a fucking ballgame in the 40s that thing's quality absolutely man I tried to get I tried to get the shittiest shit pop first thing on Amazon that yeah I did the same thing it was like 999 I'm like this will do the beginning of the quarantine we're all scrambled and like we were Howard Stern to get fucking the feeds up and running yeah I like the two big wheels the reel-to-reel going in shit in my house looking like a fucking idiot no shit buddy thanks so much for fucking coming on with this man we appreciate it I know the fans appreciate

it everybody has been fucking asking for you and we couldn't work because no one's more garbage than me I'm gonna convince you guys I promise you think so I you know I know a little bit about you I feel like you really you really take care of yourself now you might have really came from garbage but you run a tight ship it seems it seems like you run a really tight trim kid dresses nice I've never seen you a couple of times over the years like if you pop into the stand or somewhere in the city always had a fresh tight leather jacket on nice jeans looking fresh yeah yeah I guess that's really what I'm claiming is I

might be one of the most recovered former garbage people it's like when you know I could be like the Robert Downey jr. almost sure yeah a good second average with John yeah now I'm like stress for little kids yeah mom was a two-door stick just got back from Pebble Beach this weekend and golfing up and down the coast California driving my Corvette I mean I'm sort of and now I'm like old guy garbage but I used to just be straight raw wait a minute that's what you roll in you've a Corvette yeah that's that's new money track holy shit that's Ricky Bobby level that's like you get a couple of bucks and

you don't know how to spend it I love it wait what year is the Corvette 2019 oh what color is it it's black black two little Bruce Lee yellow stripes this guy's the fucking a team I like him driving around like face man that's a transformer car damn that's not you have to come from garbage to fucking to that's that's your big that's when you went when trashy people get money the first car is always a dead giveaway well yeah well I feel like real trash like is like there's a difference between just trash trash and stupid trash right stupid trash we go for a Mustang yeah exactly you gotta splurge the extra six

ten fifteen thousand dollars and get the real fucking car now is that your only car or is that is that your your fun car yeah I don't have I don't need like some truck I don't live like that lifestyle you're showing up to the grocery store in a fucking vet yeah he can't get a camp in a case of water in the backseat you got nowhere do you gotta buy a six pack I don't know if you guys know how this works but people that yeah you don't have to go to the grocery store yourself that's classy that's classy well we're New York so we gotta go but still I just told you about the vet you think I'm walking through a Ralph's what

are you talking about fresh direct you can't take a nice car to the actual grocery store here well it's all Amazon we just spend all the money that we make that's just how it works that's the rule dude that's awesome that's my favorite answer so far to get in a fucking vet I can't even bring my I can't believe in this real I noticed this a lot during the pandemic because it's like why are I just I've never understood for like two years now loading water and stuff like toilet paper and paper like it's so it's so dumb if you if you're not on Amazon Prime right now you just you're just not even a human being you gotta really not

be trying yeah if you got a case of water in your trunk your trash I'll tell you that I got I got one that I'll take some out of every now and then like a real piece of garbage and they say it's real bad to keep those plastic bottles in a hot car because the microplastics just leak into the water what my mom has been slowly poisoning my family for the last ten years because every summer there's a case of water sitting in the back of the car for fucking three days yeah she's a classy broad holy shit alright so dude that car says so much I can't wait to hear about about your upbringing I feel I feel like one of

your parents had to be John Cougar Melanchem for you want to get a fucking bet that's so where did you grow up yeah where did you grow up youngstown the salt of the earth baby that's like the epitome of salt of the earth youngstown what do you know about what do you know about youngstown just yeah that it's like I'm the heart of America baby cold hard steel and Miller light commercial yeah keep nose to the grindstone blue collar and everyone there was some mob activity too I think there you go yep that's that's what I'm fishing for because the mob it's the central meeting place between New York

and Chicago so a lot of the biggest mobsters and really a lot of the most important people back in the day used to set up central camps in youngstown so it became like the third highest concentration of Italian people for a long time in America and what ended up happening is a lot of mafia stuff so yeah it was the biggest steel producing city in the world and when all that went down in like and it all happened all at once was a big deal in youngstown they were the largest steel producing city in the world and then overnight they were nothing and organized crime really ran rampant because all these guys had no

jobs they were looking to make money anyway they could whether it was betting on football games and all that and and as you guys know you know those mafia guys Fridays are for the girlfriends and Saturdays are for the wives or whatever big thing the Guma and yeah and that's what that's basically in a big way what my mom was to my father they were both married with separate families and had entire families so my mom and my dad actually were banging it out with each other for 11 years 11 years on the side with no one finding out and then my mom yeah my mom has four kids I have four older brothers and sisters like the

closest one is 12 years older than me that's my brother and then a sister 14 years older than me a brother 16 years older than me and a sister 18 or 20 years older than me do when you get into double digits it's it's a bad look so you have to come back from the double digits bread I'm very excited I'm just beginning here and there's two older siblings on the dad's side so they already were like done making families they're the same thing like 12 and 14 years older than me too so they were done making families but you know in such an Italian sort of community you don't like you know divorce is the last option so

they're you know sleeping in separate beds from their husbands and wives they're you know it's just a whole different operation and my mom got knocked up they took a little vacation to Niagara Falls did they go to the wax museum holy shit wait so was your dad a connected guy yes I can talk about it now because he's not so no point in researching anyone on the internet sure so he was so your mom was his gumad mm-hmm oh that was fucking romantic fucking situation well it's funny you say that because it really is and they both can't you know they were never together together they never got together and they are completely madly

even though they would never admit it in love with one another they can sometimes they sort of admit it if you get enough wine in one of them so I mean yeah but they're like never together so I think my dad maybe assumed that my mom would get an abortion but that was never an option so she had me at 38 in fact this is one of the the one of the only points that I was able to really think about that I wanted to mention to you guys was that my oldest sister who's I like I said either 18 or 20 years older than me that's crazy so check this out you're ready for this she was pregnant with her first child while my mom was pregnant

with me we got back-to-back picture of my mom and my oldest sister back-to-back with their bellies out in a fucking white trash what did your sister have a boy or a girl she had a girl so your uncle like two or three months old yeah that's your aunt no that's my niece that's his niece oh my yeah this is like a fucking spiderweb a white-trash Uncle Tony at this point I would be surprised if I had an aunt so what so where did they raise you did your did your did you just grow up in the house that your your mom lived in what did what did her husband say that did her husband think that you were his kid for a while or no

they separated almost immediately that was the final like it was like it was already over over but that was and they wanted to be done with each other anyway and it was just an absolute perfect excuse so he was gone but he wasn't like he wasn't that you know he just wasn't they weren't getting along anyway so it wasn't that big of a deal now the four older brothers and sisters all sort of like helped out it was like a panel of parents but my mom ran the whole ship and I stayed with my mom and in fact because my father was sort of connected and you know wanted to keep things sort of secret keep my mom told me right my mom

didn't want me going around to other kids and bragging about who my dad was or you just saying not bragging but you know mentioning that my dad is blank and blank you still gotta keep your mouth shut in the family it doesn't matter 100% and I wasn't a really I didn't know what was going on at the time so when I was a little kid she would tell me because my dad would come and visit like he was cool especially when I was super young and as I got as I grew up at all to the point to where I might realize that this shit's weird and becoming an adult I think he got less and less enticed by it like he's like good with

kids but like once I started showing like human qualities he's like oh this fucking yeah but anyway they told me that my mom told me that my dad was had a different name she said that his name was like I think it was Joe Smith or something like that and the CIA or something like no well that's not what they tell you believe it or not friends ask just say he's in the CIA I think it was like a truck driver or something that's why he's always gone for periods of time by a train yeah but no you come and visit sometimes but the whole thing was that he was Joe Smith and that he lived you know whatever he

doesn't come and visit cuz he lives way far away or something like that I mean he does visit but it just wasn't that often sure that's why and did their relationship did their relationship continue though like as you were growing up or did your mom meet somebody new no my mom didn't meet anyone knew around that time what ended up happening was that I think they stopped I think they stopped fucking like well she was pregnant with me or have right immediately after I was born I'm not exactly sure but he ended up see the big the big move was with his family because like she found out somehow they were just they

were done too but I think she heard rumors of there perhaps being another kid and sort of ended it was just over he moved on to someone else anyway he fell in love again first but let me let me finish this one interesting part of the story you guys might want to know is that so they told me his names Joe Smith and they told me you live far away and one day and I can't remember it's like nine ten eight years old or something like that I'm on the bus picking up it's like a morning trip and we're picking up one of the kids that's on the bus or out you know and I look across the street Jeff Lewis's house and there is a

white Bronco that the same exact car that my dad drove so I looked at it and I'm like that looks like my dad's car so the next time my dad came to visit I memorized his license plate and then on the next bus trip I matched the Bronco to the license plate so that is how I found out that my father lived like six blocks away from me my entire childhood holy shit that's fucking good for you and your fucking detective skills too you're like your old cop over here I love it well it was crazy because I ended up asking my mom about it that evening and it's like it was a crazy trashy breakthrough day for us because

she had to explain to me the entire story I found it out so young and found out how different I was and and and you know that shit's just crazy when your mom's like here's his real name blah blah blah blah blah your Italian is hell your your that he's a he's this and that and everything else and here's why you have to keep it secret here's what's really going on and a big part of me thought it was very cool you know what I mean I mean I mean in the movie natural psychology is also like tells you like oh your mom just like the first decade yeah in the movie you would grow up to become the mob boss of fucking

Youngstown that's how it would go you would assume your rightful place at the fucking table your mom must have been stunned that is such an Italian thing yeah I copied down the plate number ma he made the Bronco Tony made the Bronco that's such like a fucking that's such a guinea thing I love it shit that is fucking awesome she would be cracking up if she could hear you say that because that's absolutely true we don't know about it almost every point a year about around every Christmas time I bring it up he's out there checking tire tracks in the drive he's licking dirt he was here two days ago those tracks are fresh you

fucking lied to me wow yeah I would that's an enthralling story that's in is that common knowledge that people know that about you I mean if they put all the podcasts that I've ever done together like in different if you lined it all up but you know I'm getting straight to the garbage here that's a fucking story dude the twist and turns of that thing is nuts we've never had anything like that no that's fucking and also and another huge factor is that I'm growing up on the north side of Youngstown which at the exact time that I was growing up there it's still one of the poorest in

capital country but when I was growing up it was the crime capital of America per capital like Detroit and Chicago obviously might have a few more murders but if you line up the population of Youngstown with the people that were getting killed it was something ridiculous I think it was I think it was we averaged one a day or something which is crazy because there's like I can't remember the exact statistics I just remember it was horrible in the you know early 90s mid 90s late night it's been horrible the whole time but it was really especially bad so I'm being raised basically Italian white trash

combo in an all what had become an all-black neighborhood that was getting arson doubt a lot of gangs because now they were cracking down on the Italian mob in Youngstown so all the black gangs took over and it became sort of like a turf war but not really because the black gangs were just doing like sort of different kinds of crimes than the Italians were doing because good fellas and all those movies made the mafia like seem cool so they cracked down on it big time I mean that's why I'm guessing they cracked down on it I'm not exactly sure but they just weren't having it back then so so that's the crazy

neighborhood that I grew up in is just it was just a bunch of like a bunch of Rugrats in the poorest dirty as part of town first like 13 14 years of my life damn damn dude the way you explain that it you know like a sociology teacher a professor or something like that that is fucking articulate that's a hell of a treatment yeah get someone right in that no kid that's just something that yeah it's I've had to put the it's something you have to reflect on when it's your dog shit story so what are hold on what's your mom do for a living that's so funny you mentioned that one thing I was just gonna throw in there was that

another reason my mom and dad stopped hanging for sure was just after I was born my mom was going through a green light and some guy had just stolen a car a few blocks away and t-boned her at like 80 miles an hour and rolled the car eight or nine times so it like destroyed her spinal cord which was which was pretty rough but she would she would have it would have been better if she wouldn't have I think she ended up really enjoying pain pills during that time during the first so does the big man part yeah hey oh sit down you know what I mean but you know that was then and it certainly had a lot to do with

her back but did she go back to work after that now she was basically bed ridden and she at the time was running a lot of the entire numbers operation for all of that company in young so I thought I was gonna say she worked at the nail counter at boss cops or something like that holy shit dude and any any woman running numbers is a tough brawn not only was she running it I mean running it running it she was like one of the and again I can talk about this now because I know for a fact that she would laugh about it because I've already talked about it

before and it's silly but you know she was like a she was like on the boss side of things that yeah not just collecting or even or even you know keeping of the number she was truly doing it all and at a very high level and with some people that were tremendously into those to that level of gambling and things like that it was phone calls all day in fact here's a good one I'll tell you you sparked a good memory is that fucking when I was a tiny little kid yes all the house and you know how obviously you're not gonna have give someone your real name okay I'll make up a fake name but I don't do the actual fake name that she

was and some fucking guy's son ends up doing the math that my mom was anyway so we'll say like you know say her name was Karen right her name you know in that world would be Carrie I guess we'll just say for example right okay so one day I'm a little kid and you know how when you were a little kid and there were landlines and shit I don't you guys are that you would pick up yeah phone some to be like cute or adorable or whatever sure and so the phones ring in one day and let's say my mom's name is Karen and okay and the person asks for they go hello is Carrie there and I know she lives here and I hung up and it happened a

couple times but eventually I said to my mom I go you know hey mom bunch of people being calling here lately asking for some he named Carrie saying they want to put a nickel on the giant I swear to God she literally is like Tony if anyone ever called you're asking for Carrie you put me on the phone and it stood out to me is so weird even though I was young I'm like why would you be Carrie and then later on again of course we figure these things out and also she's just very yeah she's very open and cool about it because they know they're just completely out free you know what I mean it's not like how it isn't in

Youngstown it's not like how it is in the movies where it's like you once you're in you either die or go to prison it's you know when they're cracking when they were cracking down on stuff during that time during the real ending part people are like okay we're we're out yeah we're getting out here something now was that something that was in your mom's family like you know she didn't just start doing that on her own right I have to assume her parents what's interesting is that was basically my dad's version of child support for her yeah yeah at the fucking kid and you're taking over this entire territory of

numbers this is your job came to your dad's side and was his family on my dad was his family was ingrained in the mob like his parents and you know it's not always families again that's another sort of like misconception is yeah there's families and you can be part of a family I mean you you know if you're there's a lot of independent people that are part of a family sure like a family where it actually runs in the family that's like you know Godfather levels of stuff I don't think that's really how it operates the last 20 years I mean maybe I'm wrong shit man dude I had no idea any of this no idea well so it's like a

hot Italian garbage it's a hot Italian white trash garbage and I love it but as far as like your upbringing like you know like when you when you were a little kid when you think back like you know when you're a kid you were like you know there was still like you know there was a home there was you know cartoons there was all that kind of stuff right all that stuff was was pretty much normal no it was pretty trashy so it was you know even though again my mom you know had that what would seem from the outside to be an unbelievably you know financially beneficial job it really wasn't that great she would make

sure that I had a new pair of nikes when the school year started and she would make sure that I had a couple new like outfits but other than that you know it was I would there was a lot of Pepsi she would let me drink as much soda as I wanted as a kid yeah now we're talking for pack we would always have those on the basement stairs I feel like when the mom lets the father slip out of the child's life they they overcompensate with like disgusting food that good lessons they go easy with the sugar cereal restrictions yeah I mean it's crazy I remember eating just slices of American that craft American cheese individual

American cheese I would just go through it where was your mom's side of the family where was your grandparents and cousins and all that shit are they in the mix three out of my four grandparents were dead when I was born my one grandma that was alive just passed away last year at 100 years old that's my mom's mom everyone else was already dead because everybody was having me late you know my mom I mean my dad was 39 so so you had no cousins your age or anything like that I mean yeah yeah I had nieces and nephews around my age but and I also had cut my consider my cousins like this whole group of family that my

mom ended up dating after my dad a whole nother crazy Italian family that was gigantic and ridiculous and that was you know we would visit there on like the holidays and stuff and hang out with them so that's my cousins that's like the origin story yeah like a master jewel thief or like an art thief in Europe or have your own fucking crew or something or vigilante you should you should be Batman technically that's the wild story that's the wildest story we've had no doubt you said I should be Batman and meanwhile I told you earlier my car almost exactly like the prophecy dude the yellow racing stripes is over the top

garbage and I love every second of that it seems like it but it's not along the whole side it's just on the two front divots you got to see it it seems it found more like garbage than it looks did your pop ever have a car like that or was it always like something indiscreet like the white Bronco or something like that black suburban after that you know I remember that's when I was like super young and having a white Bronco back then was cool I think OJ ruined that for everybody he put he put the kibash on the Bronco for a decade at least another garbage thing about me that I thought of when I mentioned the Pepsi that my mom

would let me drink any amount of that I wanted was was that she always drank ice tea and I always just drank soda and she never really taught me how important or how important just drinking straight regular water oh dude they didn't even talk about water in the 90s they didn't even exist I was sprite if you wanted to rehydrate you drank sprite that's that's what you did that was like a that was like a light soda was sprite I never got like a talk about this from anyone and I literally accidentally taught myself it really only in the past year did I really learn like oh I thought water was just like if you got fat you have to

drink water if I didn't realize that it was mentally at all calm you down or make you feel good in any way other than or better than any beverage I just always thought every beverage was equal in fact I thought water was garbage seemed like it was the base nothing's got no bubbles it comes it's free in the kitchen who the fuck wants that give me a ice cold scream and Pepsi I swear to God I'm not kidding I'm 36 I spent the first 35 years of my life fucking dehydrated and I had no idea with like tight dry skin and shit yeah and I mean hungover hungover drinking whatever not realizing like oh water real just

straight waters really the trick and I would see people you know out here in L.A. and like at meetings or at whatever you know fancy schmancy bullshit and they'd always have water and I'm like what a boring douche bag that it is remember going to the like their brain brain is off hey chief let me get a cherry Pepsi stack yeah remember dude going over someone's house for dinner and they would give you a water I'd be like where the fuck is the coke dude like I'm supposed to sit here have spaghetti and water what is this jail get the fuck out of here it was always water in a cup with no ice

dude I fucking savages savages would you rock the would you rock the three liter of Pepsi or were you a traditional two liter family definitely done the three liter you know I mean that was that was something that I had I went through it all man I remember when Serge debuted I was like the only person Tony came down for a search yeah like it was a new pair of a issues the local news is there interviewing you waiting in line crystal clear Pepsi oh yeah I was like I was a disgusting disgusting child I used to every Monday as a kid I had this my own routine that I would do where I would

you know those frozen like Mrs. T's pierogi's in the freezer oh yeah so my mom taught me and my mom found a way to get out of cooking or having any food needed for Mondays at all because my tradition was right before pro wrestling would come on which I think started at eight every Monday yeah at 730 I would set up a TV tray in the living room I would go to a frying pan I'd put a couple dollops of alright slice some onions and I put them in a frying pan with a couple dollops of butter and I let those melt down while the water boils and then you dump the Mrs. T's whole dozen progies right in a fucking pot of boiling

water and you throw the onions and butter on top of the fucking potato pierogi's when you're done and watch pro wrestling and eat frozen pierogi's with a giant taxi every Monday how old were you when you were doing this again you know not that not nine ten eleven but I mean we're talking it was young I remember like it being like up there I remember like having to sometimes if you're sauteing onions you're ahead of your time as a teenager yeah if you're sauteing onions at 12 to watch pro wrestling in a TV tray you're they're divorced dad at that point holy shit well an interesting fun fact that I could

probably rationalize that on is that my father is like a world-class chef that owned his own restaurant as well and my mom also is like extremely competitive in that field not like actually competitive but like for example my mom makes such good red regular spaghetti sauce with like meatballs and sausage and pork you guys know what I'm talking about here in New York right yeah like spaghetti sauce yeah starving right so and my father right sorry and my father like I said has owned an Italian restaurant my whole life so and if it's a big deal cooks specifically at that restaurant my brother on his side on my father's side

is like one of those whatever as big as a chef gets types of chef he ended up being an executive chef at this fancy joint in Vegas ended up buying the place and now has a chain of those places in Vegas whatever no big deal but they're they're crazy cooks they like do it in their sleep anyway my father who's own an Italian restaurant his whole life his favorite sauce is my mom's sauce and basically and I know everybody says this but I'm gonna say it here my mom's sauce truly is the best sauce and got here I've had people over my she actually sends it out to me regularly here in Los Angeles she she makes it

and then she chills it and then she freezes it into blocks and then she puts it into a frozen box and mails it to me oh my giant spaghetti dinner me and my friend will just boil noodles and thaw it out and fucking do it but what I was gonna say was is that my mom never gave my dad the recipe so one of the fun things about the relationship is that he would start craving the sauce and you know what I mean she would have you know it was one of those things she had complete control over him because he's such a fucking Italian guy that he needed the sauce whether he wanted to fuck or not or whatever he knew whatever the

situation was eventually he would just start sweating because you need to have the sauce once you have it once you have it regularly then you hate that woman but god damn it I love her sauce she keeps me coming back so so they did but so they did cook for you when you were a kid you weren't you weren't on your own your mom your mom was a homemaker tour to a degree to a degree when she did but again you got to realize that back injury really really took a huge toll on her during my childhood it was quite bizarre so she ended up getting better as time went on because I think it was mostly the pain pills no one I don't think anyone

was talking about it back then you know I think you I think something like that happens in the late 80s and your doctor says hey take this congratulations have fun it might be fun and then you're like what wow the doctor said I can take this is fucking crazy and nobody I think was talking about addiction or anything back then so I think that I think she just had a little bit of that like touch of like requiem for a dream like that lady I mean she wasn't on speed but it's like that lady that just loses herself in it and then next thing you know she's getting more and more and more and so it really like mellowed her

out and then over you know probably when I was about 13 14 15 is when she was got a lot more like mobile gotcha if that makes sense because the back injury was one thing and the pain pill thing was another so how about your dad's joint did you get to go and eat there and shit like that did you grow up in that restaurant what no no what the fuck okay so here's a good one here's another fucking losing foley's not upset about the child about like the non-payment of child support of the numbers ring he's like you couldn't get a bowl of spaghetti you couldn't get a fuck you didn't have it I figured he'd like bring

you to work with them and you'd sit in the corner they lied to him he said he lived fucking he was a truck driver Joe Smith me while he's three blocks I man a fucking mob owned Italian restaurant that's all I ever want to eat at yeah even though I even though I did the math on it and checked my mom and she told me and then we had a talk with him and obviously she told him he knows he figured it out here's how he did it blah blah blah but he never told his family a giant massive old-school Italian family so it remained just a rumor they had an idea you know I told a few of my close close friends I'm like

don't tell anybody but my dad's actually blah blah blah blah and of course they wouldn't ask their mom like hey mom Tony says his dad's really blah blah blah blah and they go no he's not and then they would come back to me like my mom said that your dad's not really that guy and that that times like that when you're a kid that's where it sucks a little bit yeah but anyway so what's cool what's it here's a crazy here's a crazy one for you so I'm bartending I move out to LA right after high school after spending a little bit of time at college but I moved to LA almost immediately and I long story short run

out of money fast so I have to go back to downtown to save money for a few months so I pick up working lunch shifts at this other Italian restaurant and one day it's rented out for like one of those banquets it's like a whatever 30 year high school reunion something like that and I'm bartending and I'm bartending and I'm slinging drinks like crazy just busy as hell you know what can I get you what can I get you because it's like open bars something like that and I get to this one lady and I'm like what what can I get you and she's looking at me like she had just seen a ghost I mean just completely locked in on my eyes and she

goes is your father playing and then she said his name and I go and I go yes and but I knew immediately who it was even though I had never seen her or never met her before and that was his original wife it was her high school reunion and when she saw me look at her bartending this kid she saw her the man that she fell in love with her 30 years earlier because I look a lot like what he did when he was younger he looks like what his dad looks like it's a very whatever dominant gene or something like that and and so she was really free this is like days of our lives fucking mob addition this is nuts so here's

what's interesting is that is when she said because obviously she has she had a lot of control over him somehow even though they'd been obviously broken up forever well she's the mother of his two actual you know children but she found it unacceptable that they didn't know me and that they she was like you need to come clean with your entire family he deserves to know your entire family you need to we're going to introduce them to his brother and sister so she's the one that brought justice to it so I didn't actually even eat at my father's restaurant and meet my father's entire family until I think it was 19 or 20

years old she brought you back in dude we get Shiloh the buff to play you I fucking know Meg Ryan for the stepmom dude this is this is a fucking movie let's go holy shit so what happened when you met I forgot I was on a podcast I was enthralled by the story I'm like I paint the picture I see you at the ball it's fucking so tell us about the first time you walked into your dad's restaurant to have dinner with the family well it's funny the first thing that I noticed was there's like old pictures old Italian pictures and like the hallway when you first open the door and and the craziest thing is I didn't even know that

my dad when I just said that I didn't earlier I said my dad looks like his dad but I didn't know that until I look on this wall and one of the first things I see is this very clearly I'm guessing had to be World War one picture is that right with fucking year was that could 30s could have been yeah now 1919 1918 1917 that's where you're talking World War one World War two that makes more sense yeah yeah the picture looked all this shit it looked older than World War two I don't know what it was you've never seen a family member before I can imagine yeah and I'll tell you what do I know yeah and I'll tell you what I would

have went back and got one of those fucking kids that made funny if you're saying that you were lying brought his punk ass into the restaurant and had a couple of goons slapping around why I ate fucking ziti to set them straight yeah the prince has returned this is like the lion king no I mean it really is and and it was absolutely unbelievable it was ridiculous I mean did the family accept you oh my god it was beyond accepting it was they were over the top they couldn't believe that they had this like you know and I'm telling them like well that's cool and all like I'm every my answer to everybody was even though I hadn't even

tried it yet I'm like I'm moving back to Los Angeles and I'm going to become a stand-up comedian and they're like that's fucking great when you're there check out the seros nightclub that's a cool thing I remember specifically as this old lady being like you have to go to seros I was there when I was a little kid and or when I was much younger and it's the best club in all of Hollywood and it turns out of course as you may know yeah became the comedy or in 1972 yeah one of my old Italian that I'm just meeting is like when you get out there you make sure you go to seros you'll have the best night of your life and I've

spent like I don't know 10 10 thousand plus nights there I mean you have to truly imagine being it's like being drafted to the coolest team in some sport like some the Yankees of old or the whatever the you know the Miami Heat back in that crazy time like it's like you're joining an Italian family you just got drafted to a real fucking super authentic Italian family and they're like hey yeah the weirdest party ever it's like a super birthday party wait they actually had a party for you like they love you they had a party welcoming you into the family it was a whole shebang because that was moving I want

to cry being like this this is the book this is fucking this is insane you have to be writing this I would assume I mean it's already it's already written you know what I mean it's it's it's it's it's just history it didn't get your dad oh yeah get dice to play your dad again another absolute funny thing that you mentioned that because he is exactly like my dad he talks exactly like my dad that's exactly who and what I always thought when even when I was a kid and I'd see dice on like HBO or whatever I'm like wow that's just like my dad I mean he's not that you know he doesn't wear like muscle shirts and gloves and shit

you know dice and like your dad's walking up the tables in the restaurant hickory dickory duck let me ask you this how was the food at your old man's joint after all that time top shelf yeah absolutely absolutely unbelievable and I go back there now every year since then around Christmas time and he shuts down you know the whole joints shut down and I go in there and I can bring whatever friends or whoever I bring with me I know where I'm going I know where I'm going this Christmas that's fucking awesome really he shuts it all the way down and you sit at the bar and he just keeps bringing out courses everything

except for I never and he knows this like the one thing I would never get there is regular red sauce with meatballs and sausage or because it's just silly that would be you know that would be like you know the way my mom makes spaghetti sauce it would be like fucking if Pablo Escobar did someone else's cocaine yeah I got this at the house I'm not even a stepped on shit you kidding me I can taste a fucking bacon soda get out of here literally you have to understand I have gladlock blocks of my mom's sauce at all times for the last I lived out here for you know continuously now for like 14 or 15 years and

there's always an emergency reserve just in case all you need noodles so he still owns it he still operates it is that kind of the last thing that he has that he's that he's doing he kept the restaurant after everything after the settled he just closed it like three or four weeks ago that's it the pandemic hit hard and he was done anyway you know he's a he's he's an old he's an old he's got to be older than yeah and I was surprised he didn't close it down soon obviously you guys have a pretty solid relationship now everything has been somewhat mended to a degree and yeah super super cool and you're close with

your best of ways like this last yeah this last trip for example I took my entire podcast crew with me because we were doing you know crazy sold-out shows we had it routed Columbus Pittsburgh Cleveland and Youngstown's right between Pittsburgh and Cleveland so I had a Brian Redban and Jeremiah Walkins and Joel Jimenez the Joel and Jeremiah the band for we had Jeremiah yeah lovely yeah he's definitely garbage yeah he has another wild garbage fucking there's like they were like they were doomsday preppers with like fucking they were like strapped to the teeth with guns and shit he's real Midwest trash real Midwest trash but

this last time so like we got in what was the order of events we had a whole day off in Youngstown I set it up that way and what we did was we hung out in the afternoon with my mom we rolled up from Columbus two and a half hour drive so we get there we'll say noon or whatever and we fucking eat pasta like you wouldn't believe like I mean truly like mounds of this shit and then you finish it you're like well I'm definitely not gonna have seconds I don't know why Tony's mom is saying you know when you get up just get it yourself the thongs like I'm not gonna need more pasta than this but you know everybody does it's crazy you just

have to picture them I want it so bad I wanted I can't I'm sorry we block that off on Friday afternoon I stayed at my mom's place they they were all at a hotel right around the corner they got to rest up for a few hours and then we all went to my dad's place bottles of red wine galore peppers and peppers and oil with the craziest bread that just fucking melts away and then coarse coarse coarse coarse salad minestrone like you know gourmet everything fuck this fancy salad fancy soup fancy appetizers calamari this that you know unbelievable pasta dish but when I when I do eat at my dad's place I get the

seafood pasta it's incredible that is instead that's a classy order to seafood pasta it's a fucking pop and it is but it's a bold order at a fancy joint or a steakhouse or an Italian restaurant because it's it's risky business you know you don't know when the seafood man you don't know the mixers there's so many things that can go wrong well that's why it has to be done so well but not at your pops though huh see who came in today what are you talking about it's Fred he would never in a million years you order at a diner no one's ordering this that's the one thing about wise guys they'll do a lot of shit but

I'll tell you what they eat and fight any old fucking seafood now the muscles better be fresh when it comes to shellfish mobsters it's top shelf they're not getting the day old it ain't happening dude how about that and you're fucking with that go ahead I'm sorry I'm sorry we got a little bit of it the way even in that prison in Goodfellas that size of that ice chest that yeah the fucking big fresh lobsters yeah I want to hang out with Tony's parents on Christmas and and fucking dude successful stand-up you're doing a fucking sold-out show all around that area and you come home with your whole

crew talk about fucking local dude local boy makes good fucking an ostracized kid on the fucking playground didn't know who his family was everything was kept a fucking secret when rightfully so you should have been running the town at 13 meanwhile you're making your own fucking parochies watching wrestling and look at how that fucking story ends that's fucking insane and you know the without a doubt that's doing without a doubt that's well yeah but without a doubt the two are correlated you know what I mean sure like a coincidence of course if I had obviously normal parents and some boring normal what people think is a

right childhood then you end up with what no work ethic no fucking inner hunger not growing up fast all that stuff but to mention I'll throw one more cool thing in there because you made me think of it when you're like what a redemption story what a fun trip to Youngstown was that on top of all that I had to squeeze in on that first day on that Friday that we got in I remember now though I dropped those guys off at the hotel and before going back to my mom's after pasta I had to go to the other side of town and do a podcast with boom-boom Mancini who's from Youngstown he's like a god where I'm from he's the

biggest the biggest deal and he just started his first ever podcast that's a very famous boxer that former champion of the world that killed a man in front of all of America you guys probably know this man see me baby of course you can imagine he's born and raised from Youngstown gave back to the city when he became a champion he's literally a god there so the only thing cooler than all that and having those magical times and getting to most importantly share it with a few friends is going having to run an errand like oh I'm in Youngstown oh I gotta go to boom-boom Mancini's podcast yeah that's just like a hot sentence to

even say yeah yeah it's like being in Washington DC and having to go do George Washington's podcast that's fucking making it baby I'll tell you what man I liked it before I fucking love you now I'm in your fucking corner that is a fucking tale of tales right there holy fucking shit how do you not get behind this guy I fucking I mean why and I think you know a lot of the douche baggery that I do come across as and the bright braggadocious you know cringe worthy stuff that I say and do a lot is because of as cheesy as it sounds that like I know what I've been through like it's you know I don't mind playing the

bad guy I feel like I can always eventually win it back and you know sort of play the heel and enjoy that part of things because it doesn't get any wackier than what I've already been through I want to open up the movie alright fucking an exterior shot of your mom's house in the evening probably like on a fall day and we kind of just go into the house it says Youngstown whatever year and it goes in you can slowly hear the wrestling on this fucking small TV you see the TV stand in the living room with the old couch and it fucking goes in and there's a fucking young Tony Hinchcliffe salt and fucking

onions making his own fucking dinner and then fucking do the juxtaposition like your dad what's going on with that and all that stuff and fucking just build it up from there oh my god final scene he peels out in a Corvette racing stripes fucking you driving down the pch in the fucking that fucking doing 80 with your hair blowing back that's fucking and I'm serious you guys you guys should have literally today there I am flying southbound on the 101 a hundred miles an hour as douchey as it sounds loud music all the way up just having the time of my life I played golf at Pebble Beach this weekend I found golf four months

ago now I'm addicted to golf yeah I'm an asshole look at you fucking look at he's also I mean you know from trash but he's the only guy to ever wear a collared shirt as a guest on the podcast is that a William Murray golf shirt that's classy who's that was that a pig I don't know whatever whatever looked good on Amazon anyone who doesn't shop it for everything on Amazon deserves to die now I could see Tony going to the pro shop at a country club and fucking just buying it out give me two of those three of those four of those take it off the mannequin I need it let's go I'll catch catch me on the first T-box wow holy

shit there's no game in my game I do go to those pro shops at fancy in fancy golf courses and I go straight for the clearance rack yeah your garbage a little bit in you fucking 120 for a shirt get the fuck out of it yeah no you can find some good ones there that you'd be surprised of course wow ladies and gentlemen what a fucking episode what a fucking tale we really didn't get the question yeah one question because that was just fucking gripping as I've ever if you if you like Tony before you got to love them now and I don't care who you are who you know what it is get fucking behind this fucking buddy you

got a fucking I'm rooting for you kid I fucking love that that was a fucking story fantastic thank you 100% garbage yeah yeah you are trash but you are the fucking garbage boss I'll tell you that boss of garbage there you go you fucking earned it talk about talk about being the head of the sanitation department it's fucking Tony Ingecliffe you drive that fucking veteran LA blast and Dean Martin whoever you want kid you fucking earned anything you want the anything you want the gang out there to know other than kill Tony what do you got coming up you getting back out on the road what's

the story I'd say yeah I've got some dates coming up in the middle of November going back to visit Austin and Dallas for the first time in a while and other than that I took the rest of the year off it's a pretty easy breezy just kill Tony just hanging out with the crew having fun in a big giant empty main room of the comedy store normally with 550 people in there and now killing about nine there's about nine people in the room so we're we're doing something right absolutely buddy fucking the show is unbelievable the fucking story is unbelievable his podcast is unbelievable he's one of the guys fucking

charging through the future in the fucking entertainment industry and we could not be more than happy to have you and hear that fucking tale buddy thank you so much for fucking being a part of the show we loved it yeah man you guys are absolutely great that it was fun to a fun to share the story with you guys are doing great work over there thank you thanks brother Kippy what do you got the folks out there they got to know before we get out of here as always just make sure you rate review subscribe on iTunes full video available on YouTube and check us out on that patreon.com slash are you garbage yes so

guys the next time you hear us we'll be coming at you from from our own studio digs again we thanks gas digital for everything we love you guys and hope that you continue on this journey with us and the hope that you continue to support gas digital Tony one more time thank you so much buddy we we really appreciate you coming on we'll see you gang later peace