Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Tracey Carnazzo: Trashy or Italian?

Episode Date: March 26, 2020

The super funny, SUPER Italian Tracey Carnazzo joins us this week. Tracey tells us about being Italian and growing up in NYC, the difference between sauce and gravy, and  how to cut family members out of your life.  You may know Tracey Carnazzo from her podcasts 90 Day Fiance Trash Talk, Teen Mom Trash Talk, and Only in New York. Have Garbage Questions: [e-mail] Subscribe. Rate. Review

Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H Foley. Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast. This is the Are You Garbage podcast. I am your host H Foley sitting to my, I don't know, my idiot, right? I'm 110 miles away from you.

What are you talking about? You fucking idiot. And that's the way he likes it, folks. Kevin James Ryan, everybody, give me a nice big round. Hey, what's up everybody? Happy to be in my kitchen right now. Thanks for tuning in, everybody. We appreciate it.

This is the first time we're recording on this, so hopefully it works out. Everybody's doing this bullshit. I know. The corona times, you get a little bit shittier of a product, you know what I mean? But the content's still going to be good. That's what I'm happy about. Everybody is recording digitally. So bear with us.

We're trying to, I'm trying to find out better solutions as well moving forward, so. But happy to be here. Thanks for, thanks for tuning in. Very nice. We appreciate everybody rating, reviewing the podcast, everybody sharing the podcast, everybody subscribing on YouTube, everybody subscribing on iTunes. And we have a very, very special guest with us today. She's not only an amazing podcaster, you can see her just about everywhere.

She's also given us a little bit of tips, a little bit of advice, and I'm a very good friend to all you garbage, our good friend, Tracy Carnazo, everybody. Thanks for having me, guys, I put on some makeup, nothing crazy, just like a daytime look. Fantastic. I feel like Michael Strahan and Kelly Ripa over here, doing this, doing this broadcast like this. How the fuck is Michael Strahan?

He's not on that show anymore. He's on Good Morning America. No, but he's on Good Morning America. Yeah, but he's not on Kelly and Ryan because my mom tells me about it every single day. That was a big to do when he left. He just kind of rolled out and down. On his wife's too, apparently. She was hit.

He pulled the same thing on his wife, Kippy. Did he really? Yeah, he made some flight attendant or something. I think that's why he's working so much. Talk about garbage. He's working to cover the fucking divorce. Cover the alimony payment. I understand that.

Dude, he got crucified for that divorce, crucified. Now he's on fucking 15 shows. He's a straight up Joey Fatone now. He is. Yeah, yeah. The Joey Fatone still operating? Talk about garbage. Yeah, he hosts a lot of shows.

He hosts every like network show and yeah. I saw Kelly Ripa in the streets. She is, I mean, she is ageless that woman. She is. Yeah, she's very tiny. I used to live in San Barbara and she had a place right by me and I used to run into her in town all the time and she's probably around, I would say, 72 pounds. Yes.

Yeah. She looks like she's smaller than you would even think. Like you think she's small and then you say you're like, holy shit, she fights her. She looks evil behind the curtain. I bet she's brutal. I bet she's brutal to the waiter. I'll tell you that. She ain't, she ain't cool to the waiter.

I'll tell you this, between me, you, Tracy and the lamppost, I used to have quite a crush on her back in the day when she started with Regis. I gotta be honest, I was Goo Goo Gaga over her. On days I would stay home sick, you know what I mean, huh? She was your girl. She was like your celebrity crush. Oh my God, I loved, loved, loved. That's a week.

That's trashy. That's a week's celebrity. You're in love with the daytime TV host. Wow. You ever see that one lady on General Hospital? I love her. I used to be brilliant to Regis, so I got it. Is that true, Tracy?

I gotta go to Tracy's house. I grew up with Reg. I even use Asperg Cream because Asperg Cream is aspen free. Has Regis no live or did he die? Regis is taken? No live. I mean, question mark for, you know, the next few months, but right now he's good. Speaking of which, talk about the garbage being said, Kenny Rogers lost it, lost Kenny

Rogers over the weekend. I know that's so sad. I used to go to, right on Queens Boulevard in Queens, he had a Kenny Rogers roasters and I used to- Wait, you've actually been the one? I have. I was very little. We can stop the podcast right now.

Oh my God. This kid's trash. I didn't have any Rogers roasters, folks, talking about an unprecedented situation. I remember there being some kind of cornbread. Oh, I bet there was. I bet you Kenny made a mean cornbread. I didn't even know those were real. This is the first time I'm- Tracy, you're the first- you're telling me that you've

also been there. I had- I thought it was just a bit this whole time. I didn't know. No, they're very real. So my two grandmothers used to be best friends and they were like pretty into roasted chicken. So we used to- We used to find a different- Do you have any family members who are into roasted chicken?

That, you know, we would be at Roy Rogers sometimes. You remember when Roy Rogers had the Honey Roasted Chicken? Yeah. I remember Roy Rogers all day, loved them. I remember when they weren't just on the- Roy Rogers and the Honey Roasted. And then, you know, we would stop in at a- I'm going to date myself right now at a Boston Chicken that was before the Boston Market.

Boston Chicken, yeah. Wow. That's what it first came out as. Yes. And then, you know, we would stop in at Kenny Rogers. What, the San Diego Chicken put a fight up on them? No, they were more than just chicken. Yeah, they weren't just chicken when they opened.

The only two things on the menu were just some sides and then you could get chicken or a chicken pop pie and that was it. That was it, yeah. And listen, I don't know, especially in New York, a lot of fast food places in New York are- it looks like fucking downtown Beirut. It's not a good scene when you go in there. I mean, they do know their way around a chicken sandwich in Boston Market, for sure. Look, because they're using real chicken.

They're actually cutting it from a chicken that used to be alive. Yeah. Boston Market's awesome. It's okay. Relax. I like their mashed potatoes. See, I'm not really into fast food whatsoever. The only thing that I really eat that's like from somewhere is pizza.

Like fast food pizza? No, like regular pizza. Like, I don't really eat fast food at all. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't eat it that much anymore either. Yeah. See, I consider this a trashy item. I consider fast food pizza would be like Domino's Pizza Hut.

Oh, no, I don't think this is not real. Yeah. What? You don't eat little Caesars? Well, you're New York Italian. I mean, she's not- I'm like real. Yeah.

She's New York Italian. She's not eating fucking Domino's and, you know- No, and I don't drink Christmas hot, so I'm definitely not eating Domino's. Can't hear a grandmother right now. That's gotta say, ah, no, I'm Domino's. I wasn't wrong with you. Yeah. See, I am garbage, but I do not eat-

I don't eat fast food at all. Wow, yeah. I don't either. Oh, he loves it. Oh, dude, I would eat fast food, man. It's not good. I cook everything I eat. I know how bad it is, and I still do it.

Like, I know- you can feel it when it does to your body after you eat it. And speaking of which, look at my quarantine fucking acne. It happens. It's bad. I never get pimples. I got one here, one here, one here. Are you changing your sheets, Foley? What do you mean?

He doesn't have sheets. He doesn't have sheets? Your pillowcases. Yeah, of course, of course, of course. Yeah, we change all that. I have a feeling that Tracy's like, you know, definitely garbage, but she's got some things that she's very, you know, kind of bougie about them. I'm a little bougie.

I am a little bougie, but then I also am very, very garbage. Sure. Where in New York are you from, Trace? Yeah, let's get into it. Let's start dropping this down. I'm from Forest Hills, but I live in Kew Gardens now, which is about one mile away. Holy shit. You still live out there?

I still do. I mean, I've lived other places, but this is where I've landed. So you grew up in New York City. What kind of, just a little bit of background stuff here. What kind of work did your, your mom and dad do or where we grew up with? So my mom is a Catholic school kindergarten teacher. Okay. Actually, she was for 25 years and now she works at a public school.

What's the animals? Yes. Animal. With the public school animals. She, and then my father, he passed away, but he used to work for the New York City Housing Authority as a carpenter and he worked in the Queensbridge Projects. He worked in the South Bronx Projects and he worked in Ravenswood Projects. Hmm.

Right. Pretty good. Pretty good. And who's from the, who's from the old country, as they say. So my father's side of the family was closer to Italy. My mother's side of the family. So this is really fun because, you know, when you get into ancestry DNA, and I did that to 23 and me and my mother swore to God that her mother was not Italian.

And guess what? I turned up with my results. I'm 89% Sicilian. Wow. And my mom's like, no, no, no, no, we're kind of Irish. And I'm like, hmm. Yeah. We're not 89% Sicilian.

Yeah. So we're, they just send you a switchblade back in the mail. Basically. I got, I got made a bowl of a garlic. Yeah. Yeah. No shit. You get made when that happens.

So, yeah. So you have to find your results at a social club down in Little Italy. It says, yeah, it says that, well, my, my, uh, my aunt, so my grandma, my grandfather's sister, she used to deal cards at the social clubs in Little Italy. They're from my father's family is from Little Italy. From, uh, like, uh, I think it was like Monroe Street over there. Okay. And that's where she used to deal cards.

Nice. Lulu's got a little trashy. Yeah. Well, Italians, Italians themselves, you know, it's like, they try to, they're kind of trashy, but they, like, they're the things that they like real bougie with. You know what I mean? A lot of like, you know, a lot of jewelry and stuff like that. Like they're flat.

Yes. They're flat. We like to call it gaudy. Exactly. Gaudy. That's the perfect, like they have like, you guys have like the white Christmas trees and shit. Yes.

Very. Your, your communion dress, your communion dress is supposed to be like a little wedding dress and you're supposed to have as much lace and frill on it as possible. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. We're in a gargoyle belt. I tried to, I tried to like minimize that at my communion because I already knew that

I didn't want to be judged. Like we don't have my mom, you know, she lives in Forest Hill. She doesn't have like a marble statue in front of the house. Yeah. Like a fountain with a tiger or something. Yeah. I remember when I was in high school, I was like, mom, why can't we get like a Mary on the half shell for the, for the garden?

Yeah. You wanted one. Yeah. I did. Cause everyone in my class had one. All your friends have one. Yeah. That is some, that's kind of, that's, that is Italian.

That's like New York. Right. Northeast Italian garbage. Do you think that a lot of people know what that is? It's like, it's like a statue of the Virgin Mary and she's like, she's in like a little band show. Yeah. Yeah.

Of course. She's doing like the touchdown symbol. Yeah. Yeah. She's, she's just got to pick six. I think, I think people in Philly, New York, Austin know that like I've had friends with that. You know what I mean?

Yeah. That's how you knew that it was like a good house. You were like, oh, Mary. That's another, that's a very New York thing. That's a good house right there. A good people. Right. I was like, mom, why can't we get Mary on a half shell?

She's like going side shop. Yeah. That was a big thing with, with, uh, uh, like blue collar trashy people back in the day too was if they had a picture of John F. Kennedy hanging somewhere in the house. Really? Oh yeah. He was, he was the guy. Just so you know, Trace, we're both, Kevin and I are both Irish garbage.

No, I know that. She's like, I've told you. She couldn't tell from my quarantine pimples. See, for, for us, if you had, you know, most people like in their car, they would have like a prayer car, but like Padre Pio on it. Okay. That's the Italian JFK. Yeah.

We always, we always have saints. Yeah. Saints in the car. Yeah. Hanging like on the visor, like a prayer card or something. Yeah. But JFK was huge because he was the first, I think the first Irish president or the first Catholic president.

So he was like our fucking. Yeah. No. First Irish Catholic president ever. He was the first hot president. Oh, he was. Oh yeah. He's that guy.

That guy was fucking something else. Can you imagine if him and his, if him and his brother were around today, they would have been, they'd be busted 20 different ways this Sunday. They had burned it out of the Oval Office in there. They couldn't look at your school board. Yeah. True. All right.

Let's ask some questions. Trace. Are you ready to play? I'm ready to play. Very nice. Kevin, you want to start it off? You want me to start it off? Start it off.

Let's do some of the, you know, some of the basic ones. Now, being, being, being an old school Italian, a lot of this is going to be, because I grew up with a couple of kids like that. There's no way this is going to fly with her. Sure. I know. Yeah. There's no, there's no way you're going to be garbage on a lot of these, I think, especially

the basic questions. You're just not asking the right questions if you don't think that I'm garbage. No, I know, but like what I'm saying, it's a different kind of garbage. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, okay. We'll start with this.

What kind of soap did you have growing up? My mother was like a dub bar kind of girl. And then when, when a dub body wash came out, it was big in the house. A big body wash, but a little piece of dub body wash is a step above dub bar. But I'll tell you what, I bought a dub bar the other night at the grocery store, because that was all they had, but it was still nice, took a nice shower with it. Nice and smooth. Dude, that's all I use.

I use the pink dub bar. Yeah. So my grandmother used to use the pink. I would use the white. Yeah. The pink is great. I feel like a lady. It's awesome.

Yeah. I'm an inside. Grandmoms always did have pink stuff. Didn't they? What was up with that? It matched the tile. What grocery store did you have growing up? Keyfood.

It's pretty good. Now a key foods. Nice. There's one right up the street. That's key food is the rich key food is the nicer grocery store in Astoria. Yeah. Okay. Can I just say something about key food?

Key foods are privately owned. They're franchises. So key food could go either way. It could be hit or miss because I want them to miss. That makes sense. I think I had like a, it wasn't a high end grocery store. I worked at the key food, by the way, that was my first job. What'd you do?

I worked at a grocery store too. I was the cashier. I'm a girl. There's no other job that you could do with a grocery store when you're a girl. Yeah. Yeah. I was the cashier too. Were you the sassy cashier?

Did you give attitude? Yeah. It was kind of fun. I remember I worked there when ketchup potato chips came out and we used to buy a bag and like share them. Do you want paper or plastic? There was no paper. There was no paper.

No paper. New York is only plastic, man. You go out, Trace, you might not know, you go out like, we grew up, it's paper or plastic. I'm down, I'm in Jersey now and it's, it's all paper. There's plastics only New York. They give you 10,000 plastic bags when you're there. Well now, I mean, it was banned for a little while and now that everyone's dying of, you know, the plague, they're letting us use the regular plastic bags again.

But now we didn't have a choice and I worked there and then I turned into a CVS and I just worked there. It's like whatever the building was, you just worked there. You came with the lease. I literally, if this is a whorehouse, I will do what I have to do. That's fucking crazy. You show it. They're like doing construction.

You're there like, I'm just waiting for you to open. I'm the bag. I'm the cashier. Yeah. Did you have to like take some time off while they redid the place? Yeah. I, I, um, I wasn't like, I didn't go seamlessly through them. I worked at Kifu when I was younger and then years later when it became a CVS, I was like,

I don't work here. I know the building, you know, that's probably get closed on a Friday, open up as a CVS. And I still have my key food shirt on. Yeah. What's going on? I'll tell you what, just to backtrack a little bit. I love paper over plastic. When you have it, when you have one nice, not too heavy paper grocery store bag and you're

walking back to the house, a little bit of fucking lettuce sticking out the top. You feel like you're in a movie. Yeah. Yeah. All you have to do is when you drop the corner, you have to drop the bag and go, wow. And then run over to it. Cause something fucked up.

Yeah. Like a baguette coming out of it. Yeah. Exactly. Those bags, those bags in the movies always got thrown on the ground when somebody got hit by a car or something like that. Ma, what are you doing? Oh.

Yeah. All righty. Tracy, I think I could dig in here a little bit. You ready? Dig. Have you ever been to a gender reveal party? Yes. Ah.

Garbage. I've got a thing now. That's fucking, I'm not going to any, any one year old birthday parties or gender. I'm not doing it anymore. That was it. Kippy. Kippy.

If you want to get her, you got to think about what the Italians do. Think about parties. Think about communions. I know. All right. Have you ever had a bar laid out on the washer and dryer at a party family? Like if like they had the washer and dryer next to each other, then you put, like, No.

Cause my washer and dryer was in the basement. Ooh. That's tough. Yeah. Sorry about that. Okay. Good, Kip. Not good.

What's your parents drink? Um, my father was sober and my mother is like kind of just like not good at drinking, but like she'll, she'll like have a sip of something once in a while and her favorite is Zambuca. Oh. The only liquor that we ever had in the house growing up, we had like just a few bottles and it was, it was gifts, you know, it was like, and they were all cordials and it was, we had a bottle of Kahlua, a bottle of fringelico and a bottle of Zambuca.

Oh, that's, that's real Italian. That's fucking. Oh, what do you do now though? That's the, that's the fucking get out of my neighborhood starter kit. It would come out only if my parents were playing cards at my aunts and uncles and they wanted to put something in their coffee. Yeah. There you go.

That's another old school thing that nobody does anymore. Nobody's playing cards. You know, we're playing cards. We're playing cards over here. We got warrants going. We're quarantine, but I'm just, I mean, we're playing who know. Yeah. Well, you know, you know what ruined it?

You know what ruined it? I don't know if you guys might be too young to remember this, but around like, I don't know, 2004 or something like that. I was alive then. Okay. So he's, he's not 13 fully. Sorry guys. I know.

I have beautiful friends. That's what I said. I said, you guys might be too young to remember this. I realized I'm an old man. People in my generation started to like really play poker. Yeah. There was a poker thing. A poker.

Oh, dude. My brother used to have the book. Yeah. Me too. He still read the book about the poker. What's the, there was a guy, there was a famous guy about the poker. There was like 10 of them. There was the, uh, Doreal Brunson's like, oh, Doreal Brunson, that's him.

He had the book and he would play the poker and read the book. Yeah. The guys would walk around with their own little like, with like the silver cases and chips and shit. Fucking loser. Yeah. But you were running a legal, a legal bookmaking operation in some kids' face. I'm talking about regular guys walking around.

It was me and Tracy's, me and Tracy's cousins were doing it. Me and my aunt. My Aunt Mary. Have you ever owned a cactus or cacti? I have, uh, like five cacti's in my kitchen right now. Cacti. I have five cacti's. Is that an Italian thing?

I just like them. It's a garbage thing. I'll tell you. I don't know. What? Cactus? Where'd you get them? Uh, I got some of them from Home Depot, some of them as gifts.

Yeah. People get me cacti as gifts. Really? Well, I know what to get you for Christmas. Yeah. Yeah. I have a whole shelf of like, um, ceramic cacti too. Tracy, do you make, uh, do you make cookies around, uh, Christmas?

Of course I do. I make cookies around every day. Look at me. You do the pits, you do the pit cells and all that? Uh, yeah, yeah. We do them. All right. I got one for you.

Are you a Coke family or a Pepsi family? Oh, we don't drink soda. We don't drink our calories. Jesus Christ. You don't drink soda? No. I'm always amazed when people don't drink soda. So what?

All right. So hold on. What would you drink growing up as a kid? We would drink, my mom would make, uh, powdered iced tea. Like the liquid iced tea. That's trash. I grew up with it. I loved it.

Fucking garbage. So good. Liquid iced tea or country time lemonade. Trash. Trash. Trash. It was never, it was never the actual liquid, but if we would order Chinese food, which almost never happened, but if we did, they would give you the can of Coke and my mother would

let me and my brother split it. Why is that? Which people that grew up in the city, Chinese was like, it was like Haley's Comet. You got it like every four years or something like that. Yeah. My mom cooked every meal. She didn't believe in, in, uh, getting outside food. Yeah.

That's, I'll tell you what, man, country time lemonade. I, when I was a little kid, I wanted to live wherever they made those commercials so bad. That whole thing on the porch, the kid riding, the kid riding his bike down the old dirt road, his feet off the pedals, that hidden valley ranch. I wanted to live in hidden valley ranch so bad. All that 11 hidden valley ranch. Dude, the best was clean living. Those powdered iced teas, right?

It was like another one was like four seasons or something was like the four C, four C. You were real trashy. That's all we had, dude. It was the member that were like, dude, they were like two feet tall and you would like goop down inside of them. Dude. I know I would let my brother make the iced tea because he made it too sweet. Dude, that was me too.

I remember the first time you got that like big green pitcher or the tan. Yeah. At the Tupperware. Yeah. Um, when you're, my mom first let me make it, you know, like when you got to the age where she's like, you make it. Oh, buddy, the governor was off, it was fucking, it was the wild, wild west out there. But how about when water would get in there and it would turn into fucking quick creed

in like two seconds when, when it drops of water, got into the, into the powder can. Yeah. That was turning. Oh yeah. It would make like little iced tea candy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh man. Another really garbage thing we would do with that. I'm sorry. Tea candy. We had.

So do the kind of candy we're allowed to eat. We had our own, uh, popsicle trays. Like you can make your own popsicles and we would put the iced tea, we would make iced tea popsicle. Yeah, we would. Oh, I loved it. Or lemonade. The lemonade's really good.

Yeah. Lemonade in my house. The iced tea went first. Lemonade, if you were in a pinch. Lemonade was always the last thing. But then what happened with those ice cups was you would suck on them and they would just turn into regular ice cube. They would, yeah.

You would suck all the stuff out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So we have the actual, um, like popsicle thing, like the little, cause we used to have to put it in the ice cube tray with a tooth, with a toothpick like tread. We weren't fucking hillbillies. Yeah.

My mom would pour the. We had the plastic tray. Yeah. With the straw. Did you have the one with the straw at the end so that when it dripped, you could just drink the drip? I think so. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Oh, you're like, you're like rich kids who got crazy straws and stuff. Yeah.

You know, it's like a little cheese maker growing up? No. My mother made her own grilled cheeses. Yeah. That's anything with, I had a lot of food questions and that's, they're all, yeah. I mean, I forgot your mom was diehard. You know, she was, I got a feeling Tracy's mom probably knocks it out of the parking the kitchen.

Oh my god. She really does. But I gotta tell you as, as good as my mom cooks, I cook a little bit better. Really? Now do you, do you refer to, do you refer to it as a sauce or gravy? I'm a sauce girl. What does your mom call it? My mom calls it sauce.

My grandmother called it gravy. Yeah. I feel like that's a real old school. Yeah. I feel like gravy is really only, I feel that's more Jersey now. People call it gravy. No. My grandmother called it gravy because see the thing is, and this is kind of the difference

between sauce and gravy. My grandmother would put like short ribs in it. She would put sausage in the sauce, meatballs, and then it was gravy. Yeah. Because it was like the drippings of the meat into the sauce, but like my mother calls it like marinara sauce, which is just garlic and basil and tomato and olive oil. She calls that fast sauce because it's like quick. I've heard that before.

I've heard that before. Fast sauce. I'm fucking starving right now. Geez. All right. Moving right along here. Do you know anybody that's double jointed? I don't think so.

Because that was always, remember the kid at the bus stop that could like bend his arm? Wait, now that we're doing this on video, I can do that. Oh, I can do that too. That's it. That's all we got. That's nothing. I'm talking about the kid at the bus stop that could bend his arm all the way back and a little ball would pop out of his inside of his heart.

Yeah. He was always from a weird family. Oh, that kid was trash. Yeah. Have you ever had any uncles or relatives stay at your place until they got back on their feet? You're about to have one. You think I would let someone in my house?

No, I'm just saying. Not now. I was running off when I was like an uncle or a cousin who was like in the basement. Yeah. I had my aunt lived in, when my brother moved out, my aunt lived in his bedroom. And then my cousin used to stay in the basement sometimes when she worked in Queens. That's a tragic thing. Yeah.

When she worked in Queens because she lived out very, very far in Suffolk. She would come and stay for like, you know, a few days in the basement. A couple of days. Yeah. Stay in the basement. That's always a tough one. I was on the pull-out couch for like three weeks and I was like, really, really cramp in my style.

I was like, hit the brick. I'm trying to watch some fucking cartoons on Saturday. Oh, that sucks, man. I know. As a little kid. Tracy, do you have your own place or do you have roommates? I have my own place. I live with my boyfriend.

Okay. But it's my place. Oh, it was very adamant about it. It's my place. It's my place. So you're in there cooking all the time on Sundays and stuff like that. I cook like crazy. Yeah.

I cook every meal. Like now people are staying in the quarantine. Like, oh my God, we have to cook every meal and I'm like, yeah, I mean, this is literally what I've been doing my whole life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's easy.

I thought people were going to poison me forever. Like not just now. What does your boyfriend do? He's a comic. Oh, okay. I would ask you, but is it who? Do we know him? You know him.

We'll talk about it later. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Fine. Fair enough. I don't want to put him there. Of course.

He's trying to get a race. Is it Regis? We need some scandal for the numbers. Yeah. Yeah. We're changing the format scandals and animals trying to get the fucking ratings up. How do you feel about cottage cheese? Love it.

Nice. Yeah. We were never. That's weird. 2% pot style friendship only. Everything else. Nope. 2%.

Friendship is the brand. Right. 2% pot style. Nothing else. What did you say? Hot style? Hot style. It's the large curd.

Oh, I love the large curd. Big fan of large curd, Kippy. I'm going to throw up. I'm going to throw up. I'll tell you what happened with cottage cheese. So I don't fuck with break stones because they have a ton of additives and when you eat it, it tastes like glue. I love break stones.

No. No. No. I'm a big gorilla glue guy. I always used to eat friendship and then one day I ate friendship and it was not good. So I stopped eating cottage cheese altogether. And then I found out that friendship changed their recipe back to take all the additives out and then I was back on cottage cheese.

I'm getting some at the store. Soon as we get out of here. I can't do it. 2% friendship pot style. That's it. What about when there's a little, what about when friendship sometimes puts a little bit of pineapple or cherries in it? I'm out.

I'm out. How do you feel about skim milk? That's the only milk I have in my house. Did you have milk at dinner growing up? No. Yeah. Milk at dinner is fucking trash, dude. I know.

Dude, I'm out there searching for somebody who else did it though. My mother was big on keeping us away from dairy and we used to say in the house, dairy is scary. What'd you grow up in a fucking video because she was so against us eating cheese or drinking milk or she was like the devil. Wait, you didn't put Parmesan on the spaghetti? No, that didn't count. That didn't count.

Yeah. Italian cheese doesn't count. It's American cheese. It was like, yeah. It was like no cheddar. It was like that kind of stuff. It was like, watch your cheese. You don't want your cholesterol to be high.

Oh, that's. Kippy, what do you got, kid? Do any of your family members, cousins, whatever extended family, anybody have a sport logo tattooed on them? Like a Giants tattoo or a fucking Jets tattoo or a ring. I'd imagine she'd be a Jets fan. Okay. I'm going to say something worse than that and I don't know if this counts, but he lives

in Florida. My brother lives in Florida. So he's got a tattoo of Marilyn LaGuardia on his shoulder. It's worse than that. He has on his. He's got the belt. Like on the side of his finger, he has the Newport logo. Oh, that's it.

Shut it. Now is the last time I ever say to him, he's got the new I don't want that to reflect upon me. I'm not very close to my brother. It doesn't matter. The gene pool. It counts. That counts.

Wow. The Newport. What? The Newport swish? Yeah. The swish. Oh, my God. Yeah.

Where's he live in Florida? He lives in Port St. Lucy. Okay. Oh, wow. That's fucking. That might be. We've had a lot of tough answers on this, but yeah, that's a that's a new low here on our garbage.

But my, uh, my cousin who obviously doesn't talk to us anymore, her husband had the fighting Irish guy on his leg. Oh, that's big. That's big with our people. We are. Yeah. That's really trashy, man. You got this guy or like, you know, Shamrock or something.

Yeah. Yeah. He had a shamrock too. Yeah. That was, that was going to be my next question. You kind of jumped ahead and answered. I was going to ask you. Do you have any family members that you don't speak to anymore?

Do I? I mean, I talked to my mom and I talked to my brother once in a while and you know, Tracy runs a tight fucking ship. It's fucking one way in, one way out. Oh yeah. No, I ran into like my, my cousins, like I ran into them or like my aunt and uncle that we don't talk to in the stores. Like I ran into like my aunt and uncle in Costco and they just like look at me.

Yeah. I know that. I saw my dad in a while, while parking lot and we'd fucking, if that's not the most Philadelphia trash thing in the fucking world, I love it. What is we fuck? They're not each other. Yeah. It was like, it was like the while, while West, we've both had our hand on our.

Yes. Exactly. Ready to go. Yeah. They're not talking to family. That's one thing that we, I said, I feel like you're all borrow money off each other. You all need 20 bucks to cover rent, you fucking trash bag. You look at them and then you just spit on the floor.

I'll, I'll, I'll Italian grandmother style. I think the, I think the Folies are too scared of not having anybody in the end. So, you know, we, we, we could never not talk, we, we can never cut anybody off. Yeah. It's a very family dynamic. It's like you, you, if once somebody gets cut, you go, oh, that's easy to do. I'll just cut them and them. And once the scissors are out, everybody can get clipped.

It is refreshing. It's very refreshing. It is. No, trust me. Is it? I like a big Christmas. Yeah. No, we have very small holidays.

Um, the only people that come to our house because you iced everybody. You spit on me. Yeah. Get out of my house. So we got like a lot of, a lot of funcals and fans over in fuzzens. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That's good. Funcles and fans. Yeah. Fuzzens too. I have a lot of them too. A lot of fuzzens. I put the moves on a lot of fuzzens and we're denied.

We have to move on some cousins too. Yeah. That's always, that's always trashy when you're like, yes, my uncle, not really my uncle. I don't know if a lot of people do that anymore, but like, Hey, what's up, Uncle Tommy? And then you're like, Uncle, you haven't seen Uncle Tommy in 20 years. Yeah. Yeah.

He's trying to explain it to somebody. Like Kippy, remember when, um, I was trying to explain my uncles to you, you were like, who's it? Your mom or dad's sister? I was like, well, it's my mom's first cousin's husband. You're like, what? Steve in my book. He ain't getting an uncle.

That's fucking Steve. Yeah. My aunts and uncles are like my mom's old coworkers. Yeah. That's a real big one. Um, you know, what's another kind of trashy, I don't know if it's trashy. It's just weird where, um, if you call an aunt or uncle just by their first, a real aunt or uncle.

Oh yeah. It's like, what the fuck is that? Yeah. You just don't care. You're like, Hey, Steve, how are you and Nancy doing? It's like, whoa, buddy, we would have got a smack for that. That's a hit-able offense. Yeah.

See, I had, I had a lot of cousins that were, uh, my parents age, so they were, they're like my uncle. Like I'll say that's my uncle, but I just call him by his first name because he's not really my uncle. He's not really your uncle. But yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I definitely, there's some of that on my family. My, I have like two half brothers that are like, could be the, you know, you know, my sister's kids age, you know, it's the kind of dicey. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Tracy, will you, will you smack as a kid?

Did you get hit? No. Kippy? No. My brother did. So I just, I was like, all right, don't want, I knew, I knew where the line was. You know, I didn't, I didn't know. No, my parents were like corporal punishment kind of people.

We got smacked around pretty good. And let me tell you something. We deserved it every single time. Yeah. Me and my brother used to beat the shit out of each other, but that's about it. Oh yeah. Oh dude. My mom was a single mom.

I told my, but he got divorced and then it was just me and my brother and my sister in the house and that was fucking hours on end. It was just lawless. I mean, granted, I was beating him up because he got a Nike. He got a Newport tattoo. Jiro, Jiro, Jiro. How old was he? He was seven.

No, imagine. I just love the cool, refreshing flavor in the books. Hey, when you find your brand, you find your brand. Yeah. He's a loyal guy. You know. All right. We got a good witness, Kevin.

We got to go a good prop ad cop on this kid. Find out what's up. All right. What was your first concert? Billy Joel. Pretty respectable stadium or Shea Stadium. I was like, wow, that's an A1 fucking. Yeah.

Wait, four or five. Yeah. It was little. It was a little baby. I think that was like a monumental tour. That tour. Yeah, it was. I don't know.

I don't remember. So it was Hairst Native Stadium or Yankee Stadium. It was probably so I'm 35, I'm going to be 36 so it was probably around like in the late 80s. Maybe like 88, 89 something like that. It was definitely before River of Dreams for sure. Then you're talking about the Christie Brinkley years and it all went south. Who's the fuck are you drinking, Kippy?

It's a Yeti. Oh, I have a Yeti too. You want to see my Yeti? Yeah, Yeti up. Fully. Go get your styrofoam cup. You've been sipping scissor powder. Oh yeah.

Plug your podcast real quick as well. Okay. So I got Teen Mom Trash Talk and then I have Only in New York and I have 90 Day Fiancé Trash Talk. Awesome. I will, I'm going to do a bumper before the episode so I'll put those as well for you. Love it. Yeah.

Normally we would do this in a much professional manner. No, I like that. You'd get to see Uncle Hank and his true element down there in the studio because it is Rona. You got his Rona going. No, you know, I got to tell you, I'm very grateful that we're not doing this in the studio. Do you want to know why? Why?

Because you make it sick and die. No, I don't care about that. The angle that you put the guest at is very unflattering. Wait, us specifically? Well, we would change that up. It is such an unflattering angle that I was like. I really have to die it before I do this podcast. Well, I'm glad we did it this way then.

Then it worked out perfectly. This is much better. Look at how thin I look. You look great. You look fantastic. The makeup, the daytime makeup, just like, you know, a little out for a stroll. Very good. Thank you so much.

I kind of want to see the apartment. What do you got? What do you work with back there? What do you look at? There's a lot of pillows. Hold on. Let's see. That's always a mark of a classy bra and got a lot of pillows.

Let me get up. Yeah, it's nice. It's nice. I'm in the bedroom because my boyfriend's working in the living room, so I'm not going to harass him. But, you know. That's a pretty big fucking place. Thanks.

So this is my bedroom because I can't flip it. I have a little set up. Is that a king size or a queen? This is a king size. Yeah, smoke a lot of new ports in that then. So it's your place, but he stays with you. Well, I own the place. Oh, we're talking to the homeowner.

So if the shit comes to shove, he's packing his shit and getting out to the left, to the left, right? I mean, it's been four years, so. Okay. Oh, wow. I think he's in queues. Otherwise, he's out on the street and that's happened to me before. I sort of have my girlfriend's house one time and all my stuff was neatly put in trash bags.

I think she's serious. She just throw it in trash bags. That's one thing. Very nice, beautiful place. Thank you so much. But we're not quite finished here yet. Oh, I'm excited. A couple of questions.

Have you ever owned any of the following animals? Oh. Hermit crab. No. Guinea pig. No. Lizard. No.

Snake. No. Turtles. No. Turtle snake. I'm going to be honest, I've had about six of these already. And finally, a ferret or a hamster. I had a hamster happy.

He had an ear infection. I made my mom bring him to the vet. They put him on the same kind of amoxicillin that we would take the bubble gum one. Oh, I love the bubble gum amoxicillin. They gave him the bubble gum antibiotic and it was just like a little dropper of that. And then I had rabbits. I had rabbits my whole life. Growing up, we had like a co-op outside the house.

My father built this like apartment building for them in the backyard. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. It was insulated. If you got, if you keep in your rabbit inside, that's, No, the rabbit shouldn't be inside. Did he eat them at all? No.

But Tanya's like rabbit. I know. He's not like a town you live in in the woods Italian. He lives in the fucking country. Yeah, but my father was born here. But yeah, crazy old Italians would definitely. Artie Bucco shot a rabbit in his backyard and cooked it. But he didn't have any food one night.

Yeah. Well, I mean, it's different. All right. I got one. Have you ever had a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese? No. I've never been to Chuck E. Cheese. What about McDonald's?

You ever have a birthday party at McDonald's? No. I've never been to Chuck E. Cheese. I've never been to Chuck E. Cheese. I've never been to a birthday party at McDonald's. I've been to a birthday party at McDonald's, but I would never ever have allowed that. Yeah.

That's tough. Do you ever see the fights at Chuck E. Cheese that happened at like birthday parties where the parents getting like big fist fight brawls? Oh yeah. Yeah. It's disgusting. I can't.

Chuck E. Cheese to me is a stomach virus. Yeah. It's not good. I try to go to a Chuck E. Cheese once as an adult, but they wouldn't let me in. Did you go for the pizza? I was going, I wanted to get, I wanted to get their pizza. Yeah.

It was nothing. They're like, sir, where are you going? Oh my God. I'm just going to get some pizza. You can't be in here without any kids. Also stop sitting in the playground. Get out of the ball please. Get out of the ball pit.

There's a Chuck E. Cheese at this mall, not too far from my house. And there's a Nike store next door. And I don't even like going to the Nike store because the Chuck E. Cheese is near it. Yeah. I feel like, I feel like even like the, like the daughter with Chuck E. Cheese is greasy. You know what I mean?

Yeah. I don't even like to look at children. You don't like kids. I don't like germs. It's a bold statement. Yeah. I'm the same way. I don't like germs.

I listen, I'll look at a picture of your kids really cute, but never make me meet it. Okay. Okay. Good to know. Good to know. I've got a hard and fast line on kids. I like it.

I know. Tough cookie. Tough Italian cookie over here. Okay. All right. Go, go, go, go. Tracy, do you have any Omaha steaks in your freezer? No, I wish.

Ah, no. Interesting. Delivered steaks as fucking. But you always save the cooler, don't you? The cooler. That's white styrofoam cooler. I got a couple of those in my mom's garage. Those things come in handy.

Yeah. Dude, going into my mom's garage is like going into a fucking garbage person's museum. There's just, What kind of people are we? Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.

Exactly. This is, you know, I had a macaroni and cheese. I doubt you guys had box macaroni and cheese. Oh, we did. We did. Dude, I've had like five boxes so far this morning. I'm talking to her. You idiot.

I know. We used to do the craft blue mac and cheese, right? The blue box. And while I would swallow it, it was like swallowing fire for me. For some reason, the craft macaroni and cheese gives me heartburn. Even when I was a kid, that is the fire of a thousand suns. Wow. Really?

You know what? The craft, the blue box isn't too bad. That's middle of the road box macaroni and cheese. That's fine. Once in a while, we would get Velveeta. Velveeta. Velveeta. You got a couple of pots that you're eating Velveeta.

Yeah. That's real cheese. That was never a dinner food, always for lunch. A never a side dish, which is weird. It was never a what? It was never a side dish. It was always the main event. It was always the main event.

Yeah. I guess some chicken nuggets from time to time too. No. No. Is that or not? Would you skip me little chicken? No. I remember we were a strict blue box craft macaroni and cheese family.

And then my dad got remarried and I would go over his place and my step mom fucking. She dropped the box of Velveeta on us. And you were like, I don't love you anymore mom. Dude, my head exploded. Dude, I was like, what the fuck is this shit? I thought I was rich dude. Hey Pop, you better make a run at this broader. I'm gonna tell you that right now.

Dude, that was something else. The Velveeta. Oh man, I thought you were so creamy. I was like, you don't have to mix it with water or anything. It just cut the cheese already. Dude, we were a big Velveeta cheese family growing up. Big Velveeta. That was a big clump.

You know, and then as I got older, my mom started buying Easy Mac, which you would like microwave with the power dude. That was fucking trash. You should have got some of your dad. Wow, that's too funny. If I see him in a wall again, I'm gonna ask him if she's still making them. Listen, your dad probably disowned you because he was like, I give this guy Velveeta. His mother gives him blue box and he chooses her out of my life.

Fuck this guy. Thanks to me. Yeah. Tracy. That's so funny. Tracy, have you ever been in a wedding that had a cash bar? No. Ever been to a funeral that had a cash bar?

I've been to a funeral where there was Spanish music. Okay. Drive by? It was in the funeral bar, but there was like a boom box. Oh, that's tough. Yeah. Tough luck. All right.

I think I got one more. Okay. We can where we can, you know, land this plane a little bit. All right. One more. And this is again, I don't know. I didn't ask you to first because the Italian, the mother cooking, but then you said you were a blue box family.

So I don't know. Yeah. That was a lunch. That was a lunch. Um, any, I mean, I obviously know it wasn't a go to, but frozen pizza. Okay. What would you say? What for lunch?

For lunch. For lunch. It was only a lunch. Today. Okay. Today or when we were kids? No. When you were kids, when you were kids.

Eleos. Oh, we have a winner. I love it. Eleos. I, uh, I still like it. I'm never going to buy it or eat it, but I still like it, but I do understand it's not pizza. It's just Eleos.

Also a good pizza roll. I'm not going to throw it out of bed. Yeah. Totino's are all right. I love it. Yeah. But not regular. I'll tell you this, especially, especially in the quarantine right now, as we can relate

to this, there is levels for the frozen pizza. Eleos somewhere in the middle, but you know who reigns king, undisputed, no question about it. That fucking DeGiorno is all right now because that's like, that's like, um, eating Domino's. Yeah. Self rising DeGiorno's. It's not what I want from a frozen pizza. A tombstone.

On the other hand, give me a tombstone. All right. What about in Trader Joe's? I mean, let's, let's get organic over here. Some Amy's, some Trader Joe's. I hate Amy's. I had Amy's pesto pizza. I was going to throw it on the stairs.

Yeah. We don't pesto frozen pizza. Like a jerk. What are you doing? Fancy. Yeah. No. You go classic.

You don't. Oh, you're doing Alfredo frozen pizza. Who do you think you are? That's true. I like a nice supreme. You a supreme fan, Trace? No,

I don't, I don't, I don't fuck with pepperoni. I don't, um, cured me. So you only need me, I don't need any pork, except for a Brigitte.

And it has to not be. Ah, Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, I'm not saying,

and I don't, I don't need pork besides that. And I don't, I definitely don't need pepperoni yuck. Oh, I love a good slice of pep. Forget about. No!

You can't do it. It's something else. She's a complicated woman! I really am. You are very divisive. I like it. Very um, you're fucking pure garbage or you're like no,

I'm fucking a bougie ass bitch. And I like the thing. I want what I want. I have, I like it. I'm sitting on my bed. I have 14 pillows. That's nice.

Not decorative. Ferhyun sized bed, homeowner, king sized bed, pillows. I am. But then she's got a brother with a new pork tattoo. So who the fuck knows?

I'll say this though. I think we've uh, I think we've gotten our first non-garbage on the show. Really? Yeah. I'm saying, I'm saying you're not garbage. No, we had,

we had uh, Jared Fried wasn't garbage as well. Oh, okay. Oh, I'd like to not say that. What? Okay.

I think he's 100%. Sure. I see what you're saying. Yeah. That's, that's for sure. She is not garbage. I don't think Tracy is garbage.

She has a very classy, maybe one or two garbage qualities, but a classy, a classy dame nonetheless. I also love reality TV. So, Yeah. That's so many people. It's great. I love reality TV.

I watch, I'm a big 90 day fiance guy, big 90 day. Yeah. Love it. I have a 90 day fiance podcast. I know I got to listen. My wife,

my wife, my wife's from another country. We had a, where we had to do the whole, from Germany. We had to do the whole, we just got married a couple of weeks ago. I remember that.

She, so we're going through, we're changing the status of her visa cause she was here visiting. So we have to, we're going through that process. Yeah. But we did, we flew back and forth for years for like five, four or five years. Oh wow.

This is exciting. Yeah. I flew over there a couple of times too. Yeah. To get pimple cream. Germans make it strong. Yeah. Tracy, thank you so much for joining us.

One more time. Sure. I have 90 day fiance trash talk, team mom trash talk and my brand new podcast, only in New York would host HEMDA from Keith and the girl and Andrea Allen from the hot mess comedy hour. And you guys can follow me on social media at tricks. He,

Tuzena on Instagram and Twitter. That's T R I X I E T U Z Z I N I. And to get all that information, you could go to Tracy. Carnazo.com. Whoo. I love it. Tracy, you're killing it too.

Your numbers are through the roof. You're doing awesome. I'm so happy for you, man. Appreciate it. And we appreciate you coming on the pod. We know you're doing us a favor here. Couple of lowlifes like us. This is great.

Thank you so much for coming. Kippy, what business you got? That's it guys. Just, you know, as always, full video on, on YouTube. So subscribe on YouTube. We're, please rate and review on iTunes.

Tell a friend. I think we're going to be moving to two days a week now that we're out there. And, you know, we're just trying to get some product out there during this, this crazy time we're in. So I think we're going to be moving to two times a week. Nice.

Everybody hanging out there. We love you. Stay safe. Tell a friend, you know, that's right. Social distancing. Two feet apart. All right, guys.

See you. Thank you. See you, Tracy. Thank you. See you.