Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Trashy Graduation Parties w/ Kippy & Foley

Episode Date: May 31, 2021

Kippy and Foley are back with a family episode! They talk trashy parents, graduation parties, and adults fighting children. Its a hot one! Thanks for listening. Love youse guys. Live Shows: https://linktr.ee/AYGLiveShows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage https://www.betterhelp.com/GARBAGE www.breathefum.com Promo Code: GARBAGE  Follow Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/kevinryancomedy/ Follow Foley: https://www.instagram.com/foleygrams/ Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans?

Hey gang real quick before we get the old show started let's talk about these live days we got coming up it's to keep it moving 2021 tour and we're coming to a town near you we're gonna be in Atlantic City New Jersey June 18th oh yeah and then we're gonna be in Chicago for our fourth and final show on June 22nd then we're heading over to Indianapolis Indiana at the helium over there on June 23rd get some tickets and then we're coming back Thursday night back to the windy city for two sold-out shows so if you heard a date on there that wasn't sold out buy some tickets and come see us it's gonna be a great time yeah guys the live show is awesome it's stand up and then we play AYG with the audience we answer your questions it's a good fucking time

get involved see you there oh baby welcome to another exciting edition of are you garbage the show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash now here are your hosts Kevin Ryan and H Foley hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast this is are you garbage sure is it's a little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out they grew up to be classy or if they're just a big old piece of trash I'm your host age Foley coming at you on a beautiful day down here at Antutti's basement it's a family episode I'm feeling good she's out of town for the weekend where's she at she's down ashore man memorial day she's there problem yeah she's down ashore that's fucking she's north of

Hollywood PD's problem yeah she's out of our hair yeah let her stay down there for the summer I'm fine with it a job at Flanders or something I don't know whatever the kids do down there pumping custard sure it's good stuff I'm sitting directly across from me from the Miami office from AYG south baby who think the new floor manager at fudruckers these guys are real pain in the ass I feel like I work at kahunaville these guys are real stickler make sure you do your silver it's my cabana where I stopped by Rudy's you look like you're gonna go bowling in the Bahamas Toby you do your side work this guy's this new guy's cracking down look out yeah ladies and gentlemen this man goes by many names head bozo but around this time it's gonna be one of those

episodes around this time around paycheck time you really butter me up we all referred him was Mr. Ryan all right Kevin James everybody the jigs up the fucking accounts empty we're screwed we're taking a couple of fucking suppliers didn't pay things went belly up yeah for a little inside baseball we're getting banged over the head right now anybody got 20 bucks I can borrow to make it through the weekend hey Patty that necklace is going back maybe catch you at Halloween or something god hey what's up gang thanks for tuning in as always please make sure your rate review subscribe on itunes full video available on YouTube and as you know those numbers are true not a fan not a fan of that at all I like a traditional true to roof that's the kind of guy I

am right up the middle okay no no bells and whistles wait a yes ended so far in the first fucking 90 seconds you jerk off I just sat here let you shit on my shirt for fucking 45 seconds you can't roll with the fucking with the true to roof god damn it and then also patreon.com you can sign up you get bonus episodes at AYG you can get episodes of hard feelings which if you're not familiar it's me and Foley behind the curtain a little bit behind the curtain it's a lot of somebody said it's like you guys do Festivus every week it's the airing of grievances the airing of the grievances whatever's been fucking hard feeling if I've been bothering Foley I hear it if he's been bothering me here's it it's a whole it's a fucking it's like an HR meeting in the world's just getting

you down whatever it is could be traffic could be anything it's not all the hugs and kisses over yeah at patreon's cooking shout out to everybody on the fucking patreon we love everybody if you ever subscribed don't fucking itunes youtube we appreciate it all thank you so much yes we love you guys very much quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire the magic man the t-bone McMuffin he hangs with the homies a lot the homies and we we shit on the homies we met the homies met the homies fucking salt to the earth people I'm telling you right now love the fucking homies love this guy t-bone everybody loves you what's up what's up McMuffin Toby McMullen everybody hey I didn't know when to talk all that intro you said my name about 15 times this host

today's a real cowboy I gotta tell you yeah I'll tell you if you hear about a party in Arizona in two days I got the crew for you yeah yeah t-bone I met t-bones buddies they're nice but did you meet the extended version of what I saw I met the twins I met the twins and they're exact if you made me if you made me close my eyes and describe t-bones friends it's these two fucking kids long hair high as a kite two skateboards fucking haven't had it they're not identical maternal twins different moms I swear to god those two would be the first yeah they were they were a cast of characters yeah but great dude shout out to the homies shout out to the homies big shout out big shout out they all the homies left today door closed I've been

keeping it together had a big weep on the couch nice yeah yeah long got a long rainy weekend ahead of you I ain't no sunshine and rainbows so that should do good for you you got some play station some dominoes money huh yeah some razor blades some rat poison a couple of revolvers I wish you I'd go out and get like three or four outfits for the cat and start taking pictures here's mr. mittens in a raincoat his name is lil snake and you'll put some respect on his name oh my god gang it's a fucking family episode it's me and the kip kip arena here uh do you want to listen you know I joke I think I think you're a fashionable guy thanks pal I like what you're doing this this seems this isn't the guy I know it's a bold kippy I got to be honest so I bought it

kippy I know wouldn't walk around and that's not even that's like what these kids this is that's not an uncle hank no this is a cool shirt it's a cool shirt it's from Zara make a couple bucks Zara I'm no longer h&m I've upgraded to Zara Zara's in the fucking Hawaiian shirt game I didn't know that these are big to everyone's doing these big this it's big I you feel like a boat I'm walking on the street I passed nine people with like a similar shirt oh it is what it is are you going to switch to red stripe that's why I like DXL I'm the most interesting kippy in the world I don't always shop at Zara but when I do I look like a double XL it's a large um dozen button that's why I like DXL everything's one of a kind I only made one kippy's ready to

pick up some dusty muff in the shuffleboard court oh yeah we'll be all over that shuffleboard court and all at bell del Boca Vista um I uh I bought it um but but but and then I wore it to uh I wore it this past weekend to a barbeque and I got my friends are sat like I like you know we I'm from a ball is this the look you showed up in with an open open I mean you look like an FBI wire man yeah you look like you should be in a van right yeah I'm fine with it um you're backing up Donnie Brasco somewhere forget about hey Donnie what's forget about it me it's on paul geomani I got a cold beer on my head forget about it call forget about it the hell is Johnny black the same as Johnny red no um you stink with a ham sandwich look at you brown paper bag um and I was real nervous

I'm gonna take heat no I thought I walked in I'm like I did I was ready to just fucking I thought it was gonna be pink mist the second I opened the door just a head shop but uh we're sitting there we're out front smoking and someone goes yo dope shirt and I'm like and then I was yeah it's cool and I'm like wow dude it was it was like it was like a pep talk to get out of the car it's just not you that's the only thing I know but it is now baby get used to it can't be scumming in hot I don't know that's a good thing or not I don't know if this is you do it I don't know if this is you turn because it because it has a it has a I'm about to be on the run in South America kind of vibe to it it's it is what it is baby we're figuring it out day to

day you could have a suitcase full of Yale in a private plane somewhere oh you trying to hang out by the way Foley was sending us fucking private planes on craigslist to $222,000 we can get a Cessna you got you literally just told me of $300 in your bank account you're fucking shopping for private yeah because the cat's payable screwing us at the end of the month fucking jammed up over here gotta keep that rivers I told everybody knows now also everybody expects also the plane was from 1976 you're probably up kept it yeah I'll take it Zara baby 3490 Zara's pretty good nice can't really argue with that I'm stepping my game up you know but the fact that everybody's doing this trash I noticed that started to annoy me I gotta I gotta

figure my situation out yeah I'm not used to you in black you look like the evil Foley you look like you you you look like you killed the fucking Hawaiian chair Foley and this is a you look like you're about the screws you look like a bad guy in a movie so he's the funny guy huh yeah yeah you look evil you don't look yeah black isn't isn't fitting for you I like black I'm all black you're the only guy black isn't slimming on it's an eclipse supermoon last night and an edit lunar eclipse strange vibes out there gotta watch out maybe that's why you're wearing this wacky new shirt I bought it a week ago doesn't explain anything I live in my best life wait till you see my new shorts you know you're not wearing I got the I'm I got the euro cut bathing suit for

while what oh yeah my fucking hoagie crusher this guy walking around with two racket bowls I gotta gotta roll a quarters in the front wait a minute um we're gonna roll a court no I would uh what's that shirt made out of what's the fabric terry not terry cloth um linen there's no linen there's no linen pants coming right I've I've perused the matching what are you fucking ain't you do fraying over here and San Juan today we're not there yet buddy you're still climbing through the sewer whatever dragging me along with you man Jesus Christ this guy's I've been trying to get this guy successful for a decade he just got his heels plugged in the sand you better put your saint

martin wear away for a little while I was just I was just looking up fucking trips to saint and you yell at me for looking at planes how you gonna get down here how you gonna get down here kippy it's like 400 it's better than dragging me to the airport all the time we can get a private plane for 300 grand right that's 300 grand but you gotta put down 10% come up with that in a couple of months I found out my stepdad's been watching plane repo where they re like you can find you obviously finance those planes you got a lot of those that's what I'm saying we can finance it we'll get some old drunk to fly it we do we're barely covering rent it's a couple of birds to play hostess or whatever it is you both just canceled your memorial day weekend

haha see to these runs to these runs like a well you gotta tighten up the ship every once in a while you know what I mean don't forget where you came from you know what I mean usually that's when you're looking at your fucking navy federal account and you're coming up red uh dude I had a below deck I don't know what's going on but I had a negative bounce on PayPal today it said I don't know how I owe them 1467 I was first time I ever saw it I opened it up and it said red negative 1467 and I was like it's linked to my cards in my bank account I don't know we're gonna get Giuliani Giuliani in here I don't know these numbers I don't know what's going on but to do runs like a well old machine unless somebody doesn't play ball then

it's the fucking house of cards crumbles Toby's legit scared for the future nah you'll be all right we'll find you a good home I'm chilling I don't spend my money yeah either do I I take this shirt off I have the exact one under it huh we're having a fucking good having a good show in the real trash colors um that's a cameo app you can I don't we put an end to the cameo but we went up might have to dust it off in these next couple of days got a birthday coming up it's graduation season we'll come to the party yeah 100 bucks you get me in fully and I need a sixer I love a nice high school graduation party always fucking top shelf

nice that's when you always found out whose parents were trashy yeah that's when you first started to see the sun went down oh man the sun went down at a high school grad party the fucking wackos came out did I let the kids drink are they not letting the kids drink so it was like there was a handful of parties you knew you could booze at right my house was one of it was also like don't celebrate it let like the grandparents and somebody aunts and uncles like let the you know let the bozos thin out a bit and then when it's the crew you know 20 30 people hanging in the backyard you know we can we can booze it up a little bit went to this one girl's party uh right away you get there it's like they hand you a beer you know what I mean not

they're not asking who's driving who's doing nothing usually the classier ones the food is kind of presented first yeah there's a mom or maybe you know it's a good sign is if they're doing like high-end cocktails sure I mean when they're throwing out like a batch of apple martinis there's a shaker go or something like that that's nice yeah but we were at this solo cup and a half warm beer yeah that may or may not have a ping pong ball in it my buddy pack got so drunk at this party the it was still daytime and the grandmother was still there and he threw meatballs in the pool and meatballs was his cousin meatballs was the dog meatballs get in there so I remember this this girl's dad they were like someone was like yo where can we smoke weed

or something and he's like white you're wearing a tank top dude if you're a dad wearing a tank top at a grad party it's a tall look okay put some fucking sleeves on your baby your baby girl just walked down the aisle you're definitely not a sunscreen man so you're burnt no yeah he was he was like a yeah he was he was he was brown he was he got the oven mitt on one hand for the grill yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no apron this guy going and he's or if he does have an apron it's got did you lift it up it's got that big dong on it you ever see one of them oh my god did I see one my uncle broke one of one of those out of me when I was like he like had at the party he's like oh look at this and I thought I was like a fucking eight and I was like is that how big you're supposed

to be because I am this thing was like two and a half feet I was like I'm way off if that's the case I gotta go to the doctor that would be like nothing I'm doing mom make an appointment I got something medically wrong with me I just thought it was the Irish curse my fire to pediatrician will you that's a tough look I did that would be like a sex crime today what if somebody did that not yeah not at my house I remember my uncle fucking doing that bit like in real time I didn't hide this so it was like 85 or something like that yeah he was just out there cooking and showed us and it murdered oh yeah it killed it always killed cow he can't be doing that these days that's right that's right yeah so we're at this girl's party everybody's

fucking bombed up I think there was like a fucking like an air an air bounce house or a bounce house whatever yeah that's the kind of people we grew up with fucking and he's going he's like someone's like oh can we smoke weed or something like he heard the conversation he heard weed he's going who's got weed and we're like remember that song you know beanie seagull smoked the la la la Neptune smoked the la la you remember that it was like a jay-z song oh yeah yeah from back in the day I guess that was hot or whatever he that's the one rap song he knew and he's sitting there fucking blitz dude wait he wasn't he wasn't asking who was the weed to tell you there's not do it he was asking who's got it like someone asked where's the weed someone asked where's the

weed and he heard weed okay I didn't know he was standing there because he fucking he smells like a bar rack this guy and he's going I hope I don't get in trouble for this and he's going you can only smoke weed if you got a bong bigger than mine and I'm like this get me to fuck out of here sir will they be serving the cake soon where are the hors d'oeuvres and he's going is there a gift table anywhere I could put this down say her say the girl's name was Courtney right his daughter's name was Courtney's go Courtney smokes the la la la and me and my boys are like dude fucking steal the fucking quarter keg and let's get the fuck out of here she was getting railed freshman year oh yeah yeah yeah yeah I have to talk a lot of trashy dad at the graduation party

you can't be wearing a tank top or jeans shorts to your grad parents out there or kids if you're graduating that's what your parents are wearing you got to do something now you can't be the trashy house no a classy house that the house that stays over that's gonna just gonna be it's gonna be popping this weekend yeah yeah yeah yeah do it right drink once everybody leaves the sun goes down it's you're not being a normal party when the family's there when the family leaves you stock beers or whatever throughout it then do your everybody looks the other way like a fucking gentleman yeah shotgun a beer in the bathroom like a gentleman holy shit I'm a shotgun a beer this weekend when the parents get too loose it's never the kids it's always the parents

yeah well they don't party that much you know what I mean I guess well like they don't I think they're going like oh we gotta hang with the kids meanwhile I'm doing this every fucking third night you know what I mean I'm my stamina in high school I was fucking cooking then these fucking parents try a couple of tequises shots next thing you know their panties are on their head see I got the big man's number today you shut the giggies trying to fucking go toe to toe we were at graduation parties that are like parents fault kids kids fault parents oh yeah I remember the first I dude it was a scene we talked about this but I remember the first time I saw an adult punch like legit fight a 15 year old kid yeah yeah yeah we were calling this just dude had longer

hair we were calling him Bon Jovi and he did not it was like it was like it was like a it was like a cousin's husband or something somebody extended yeah somebody's cousin he was no blood relation he just came in fucking now doesn't know when to be at the party and does not give a fuck yeah he did he punch this kid through like a fucking stack of bushes this kid fucking this kid ended up in the street he appeared like Homer yeah yeah that's always a mark of your circle and your family oh yeah good old graduation oh yeah if there's no pool tough look everybody's just sweating it out like they're going through heroin with girls the fuck out of there he's chained to a chair sitting in those chairs sun beating down the plastic fucking tablecloth the chips are all fucking stale by

now because the air has been getting at him some old deviled eggs I think there's some beans left trash oh god good times though oh that's funny gang this podcast is sponsored by better help the folks at better help want to know is there's something in your life that's keeping you from your happiness something that's holding you back well better help can help with a license professional therapist assigned right to you you can start communicating with them under 48 hours it's not a crisis line it's not a self-help line we're talking about professional counseling done securely online in the privacy of your own home services available to clients worldwide yeah guys if you're not familiar with talk therapy it is a game changer it's been a game changer for me uh

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in all 50 states they're cooking over there better help you know what I mean uh special offer for our podcast listeners uh you get 10 off the first month at betterhelp.com slash garbage one more time for you guys write it down betterhelp.com slash garbage gang let's take a quick second to talk about one of our favorite sponsors here on the podcast who that you the fume inhaler it's absolutely fantastic it's a canadian made wooden inhaler with no electronics and cores that's filled only with the benefits of super plants oh baby no chemicals at it nope they have the nice cores that you stuff into the beautiful little the little inhaler that they have it's all natural it's portable portable it's great for allergy relief um you know what they told the chemicals that do

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cushy dreams fantastic product i've been dabbling in the cbd for about a year and it wasn't until cushy came along that i really felt like i was fully you found the winner in the experience yeah it's flower they got pre-rolls which is unbelievable take down a half of one of those you're feeling great i like to hustle in the morning that's how i do it hustle is great get you going gives you a little pep in your step and then when i want to tone it down in the evenings when i'm watching my cartoons and get ready to go night night i pull little dreams in there yeah throw a little bit of that little glass pipe good night good night guys sleeping good yeah smoking is the fastest the most effective way to get cbd into your system the flower looks smells and tastes just like high

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you know keep it fresh you know what i mean some of you some of your questions are like animal i'm like i don't even think i can read this on air so i get fucking i might get a fucking it's like a misdemeanor or something i have to pay a fine for some of these things i can't take you seriously with that shirt well you better start because we got another about 45 minutes left you look like robin williams and like in good morning vietnam iced he does though um yeah all right thanks for that i love it uh sure sure sure sure sure what do you let's see let's see this one's just nuts to me i don't this is from reed i can't even understand this ever pour an unfinished drink back in the bottle i guess if you pour a coke oh like from like a two liter only drink half and then pour it

back in i know exactly what the gentleman's talking about you do that you've never not finished a drink though this is that's nuts to me you pour it you pour a fucking 12 ounce glass of something and you can't finish it that's you don't you're not a guy who doesn't drink fucking his a half a soda in recent no usually i i pound it i pound everything just whatever it is so no in recent years i'd have to say no but i do remember pouring something back into a bottle oh wine oh yeah my mom a couple weeks ago we bought a nice bottle of wine it's bad if you're doing it to a nice bottle i'd let you do sutter home or cabin yeah she we poured her a glass and she didn't want one so she poured it into the bottle that's a little if she didn't want it then the bottle disappeared strangely enough yeah

you probably walked with it uh now that's trash yeah yeah i can't be that's a tough look i can't even think of what you would do it with i guess i might have combined oj or somebody combined to catch a bottle or two or to syrup or something yeah i mean come on that's what that's what you fucking do can't be having two half opens floating around hmm now you should be able to finish a drink that gets like my my my wife has like a one of those cups it's like that keeps a cup of coffee hot for 72 hours it's like who the fuck needs 72 hours to finish a cup of coffee i don't get that my i've never been drinking something where i'm like i need this cold all day it lasts 15 seconds it's gone yeah my uh my fear is that there's a level of garbage out there

that we haven't even gotten to yet like and it's just starting to poke its head up in comments and tweets etc etc the bigfoot thing photographs of what people are eating yeah what consider what's considered a meal it's like x-files like skull and molder well that one dude was doing like fucking pop off fucking hot pockets the other night on twitter each way i was like but had the uh the fortune cookie from panda express class up the meal hey no matter what is that what you think it does i think i think if you have any type of dessert or treat or a fortune cookie is not a fortune cookie that came from another takeout order on a previous day is not dessert but still they put they put the meal together in a gentleman's way the fortune was class to me

you have gut rot yeah you yeah you now have gout you're late on your bills um you will be late on your bills in the future this one's like a sophie's choice for us a little bit because we're garbage not that the new one i'm sorry okay i've never i've never saw the film so i never know what that means it's it's it's a it's a rock in a hard place right yeah i think she has to doesn't you have to she has to save someone but then someone dies so is it's nicholson in it no i think it's the you love me you really really love me sally fields maybe really sophie's choice i'll have to check it out i have no little time this weekend more plans fell through more of a beaches kind of guy i don't

gonna be started you know that's listening to on the way in here kelly clarkson break away i don't know that one choking me up you know kelly clarkson i know kelly clarkson i don't know break away her main hit i'll spread my wings and i'll learn how to fly somebody that's like real singing song yeah i know it that was like an old irish song that's what it reminds us and learn how to fly i'll drunk um i'll tanked up in a bar and like you know the words of danie boy oh you ever been to a concert where you didn't want to seem like you didn't know the words so you're singing along but you're not quite right you're the last word you're like the height man been there that's trash oh yeah um all right this one this is a sophie's this is

on one end i respect the hustle because we're garbage fair enough on the other end it directly affects us financially so i don't know what to do what this is from ryan is it or bad news is it trash to share your patreon login with someone else i don't want to encourage it but i get it sure right and i think it's the right answers to go like i'll turn the other way i'll be like the parents at the graduation party once the sun goes down i've never i wouldn't know where to send a check to netflix hbomax on top of that send in a check whatever you don't have a checkbook they ain't getting in anyway how do you pay your rent every month check whose it's not mine okay just check it i used to pay my rent by leaving a stack of cash in the bread box and a different

shady character would come scooping up every month jesus christ that's awesome that is awesome it'll be in the bread box if he gives you any trouble go for the gut i had a guy when we were at temple he would hit you up a couple of days in the because he was hand up he was i paid cash up until six months ago really yeah yeah let's try it shouldn't be paying rent and cash it's a bad look it's over a thousand bucks that's tough that's what i'm saying if it's like 500 i can respect that no i was fucking and they weren't hundreds either you were a fucking 10 and 20s kind of guy it was like you were in fucking your bad boys too with the money knows if he's counting them gets into fives early that's not a good sign for it's probably not all there gotta take

the rest of the day off to count this yeah no what were you gonna say i forget um paying cash yeah i forget what i was gonna say cash is a bad cash for rent so it's a tough look oh check it's not your check is that a money order no yeah me either what uh what are we doing over here planning city june 18 come on out to the 830 show tickets are at it one show we condensed it it's one big show we're doing since things have changed all still socially distance but one big show fantastic um yeah you know i'd appreciate it if i get a little money it's times are tough not everybody's got cash and also you're sharing you're spreading we would be lying to say what like i said i've never i've never i've been watching netflix for over 10 years i've never

paid yeah but there's no i don't when i watch netflix i don't watch mr netflix what do you mean oh you're not watching him do they're watching us okay yeah but like i said after dark just don't post it anywhere that's all i care yeah i don't care if you share with a friend sure helps spread the word everybody's been hammed up sure we're currently hammed up currently sounded us yeah i mean hey fucking benmo me to five bucks yes him can't be the come down bitch all right let's see here this okay uh this is from will you william how long have you lived with a slow shower dream i've lived in my parents house with a slow sink drain for 35 years what are they doing over i don't know why don't get a tub of drain oh

did they do it comes and it goes and it comes up and they don't know when the guy comes they've had the bathroom redone two or three times since i've been since we've been there twice at least still does fucking drain every time i'm a nice bathroom nice bedroom nice and i expected i don't know what it is you're talking about a family who their toilet shits onto their lawn yeah doesn't happen to you in the front it's a little bit of an issue with the plumbing downstairs i think she's goddamn kids putting these paper towels and these butt wipes in in the in the in the toilet how many times he taught you get out of there uh yeah that's i forgot you you guys have plumbing issues all around it seems mm-hmm yeah it's okay that makes more sense it's really more

patreon material but fair i don't know my father's gonna appreciate this to be to bias um i uh hey you got like shit on your lawn i can cut it what do you care what are you kidding but i won't yeah we're not cutting it um i was just homeless past weekend up until yesterday actually i think i got home yesterday two days ago um and the the shower i grew up in i don't know what dude it's like you're it's like you're waiting you need a fucking set of waiters when you're taking a shower i'm not about that either after it's like all door and i'm like what are i feel like i'm gonna get it fucking stung by an healer yeah they're crabs in here yeah when we get mudbugs i don't like it's weird but it's also like i get it the the broads old now and it's

the secondary showers they got their shower sure you know and she just does baths for the kids now yeah they're not taking showers now but it's like i'm like what the fuck you look at his light bulbs in those rooms i'll do the kids is barren and some of them like some parts of that house yeah um looks like a sample home but also we got fucking uh it's too much house uh we got uh now because we're on the sixth floor so our bathroom sink clogs up that's a big problem in new york city the higher you go up because it stacks on yeah and the buildings from like 1932 the pipes haven't probably been replaced you know maybe once in like the fucking fifties or something so it's just like years of shit so we get jammed up so i gotta have fucking drano on deck

and the second it sees i fucking you gotta do it up i'm doing it probably maybe once a week i'm doing drano there's nothing trash here and nothing to make you feel more like a man when you do a full when you're doing a drano oh i treat that like surgery i feel like i'm i feel like nobody goes in the bathroom for an hour and a half don't touch it don't cover i'll cover the sink with it with a with a t-shirt don't even don't even look at the sink pour that shit we have this one stuff put a little behind my ear we have these we have it's a new kippy it's a good company we have these crystals that we got from the hardware store and whatever drano is drano is like you pour it down and then you pour scalding hot water or something like that

after a while yeah this one is cold water well i don't like that this one's no fuck around they're like don't put out water on it blow the pipes it's crystals and you hear them in there cooking it's like pop rocks and soda baby it's exactly what it's like you hear it working there's this thing now that they're doing i saw on tiktok the other day where it's like a foam bomb you put down in there and it shoots like it fucking if it's like a pipe bomb for you that's like yeah and like all this gook comes out pull a chair oh really yeah which i kind of like i don't want to come in the other way me either push that down in the sewer to the fatbergs you know about the fatbergs in the sewers fatbergs fatbergs they're like clusters of like grease and uh butt wipes and paper towels

i've seen i've seen i've seen i've seen yeah let the rats handle that wait you said uh light bulbs at any point in your life have you had like one of those shandal like like ceiling fans that holds like three lights and like but you're down but you're down to one because the other two are in it's in the living room it's in the bathroom if you're ever moving a light bulb from room to room that's already in a fixture that is a tough look yeah it's not good it's not good especially in new york you can just go buy a fucking you can buy one light bulb which i like about new york and we got one of them they open up the box take it it's great it's when you're real hemmed up trash uh speaking of bedrooms this is from chris did anyone did you or anyone in your

family ever have an ocean themed bathroom oh yeah ocean my cousins had an ocean themed living room i think please tell me they lived in aruba no there was like there was like seashells on the wallpaper it was nice it was real nice we actually have one of the lamps in my bedroom now it's a huge lighthouse it's fucking classy no real nice we had it down the shore my whole the everybody's got it down the shore i know but this was we had like a light the light in the light in the living were in the bed in the sorry in the bedroom it was like two single beds like two twin beds and the light between that was like a three foot lighthouse that stood on there it was like a proper like made of wood like it there was like 17 000 lighthouses in this fucking apartment yeah i'm not a fan of

that shit no it's i don't like the way um just give me a regular house i know i'm at the beach i'm looking out the window i don't like the way beach houses are decorated sometimes especially renters the ones that you rent when you were a kid we that's what we did i didn't like it yeah like fucking crab fucking nuts and shit like that like get the fuck you get tangled in it what is this long john silvers trying to fucking have a big house crab shack you ever been to a joes crab shack there never been with joes no never been to joes there's one i i drive by on route one it's closed now you're not talking about the one down in miami uh joes no it's joes stone crab i'm sorry yeah no this is just joes crab shack they were advertising a bunch although i never been never been it's a

tough look those uh corporate seafood i feel like they probably do pretty good though i don't know i've never been to a red lobster either i wouldn't say anything's fresh you don't think but they're moving quality though that's that they're moving quantity that's kind of the one thing i think they got working for them baby they're moving like fuck they're moving units it ain't sitting there for a couple of days i mean it's a burn in turn you see what you think all red lobsters are packed 24-7 all the time they have downtime i know bad days but i'm still saying they're selling more than fucking mom and pops fucking they're ordering more too got the freezer probably stacked with them i don't think so i don't know though what do i know i'm just some fucking poor smart you know what you

know what i do know what do you know guaranteed we have multiple listeners who have worked at red lobster just gonna say that who can fucking tip us to what's going on back there hit us let us know baby does the lobsters come in fresh are they frozen are they already cooked that's what i'd like are they already red they drive themselves yeah and bonus points if you worked at a red lobster in like iowa yeah what's going on there just hamburger coming under i'm not doing that hamburger painted red which i've said this before i'm a crab guy i i i said that this weekend i'm a crab over lobster all day i don't know if it's the blue i don't know if it's the blue collarness in my fan like i just 40 cores lights in you they were looking um i just don't know i just prefer it and i feel

like a fucking snob when i'm eating lobster i feel like they know i don't belong you know what i mean the lobsters know the people around me i don't want this guy this guy's a jerk all this fucking big forehead and motherfucker you're so many with a little bit of class yeah um i'm gonna eat my eyeballs i don't know uh all right let's see there's a couple hot one they got a couple of hotties hit it this is from philip with an f um did anyone in your family or does anyone in your family or you eat things past the expiration date or borderline how are you with borderline food that's a great question um the follies are many things garbage okay rich is not one of them the one thing my mom is always extra extra cautious with it goes quick yeah like if we have let's say we had coleslaw one

night the next day it's gone okay now that's from last night what coleslaw is a little different it's not there's not an asset coleslaw never had anything that was pre expert or post expiration date was served at the foley house unless it was frozen yeah those birds freeze a lot everything i know it's crazy yeah i mean every day walk it every day before they went to work something would get put out for dinner um there's something wrapped up in a paper towel in the sink like i said i was just home and my mom was down the shore so it was me and my wife in the house and uh my wife's like oh is this chicken can you ask your mom if this chicken in here is good so i text my mom it was like chicken breast or like it kind of looked like yeah it was like

chicken breast was it cooked it was cooked yeah yeah a toppy i don't know what it was in i didn't say it she just said can you ask my i might have been in a bag like a plastic bag not wrong brown bag wrapped up in newspaper yeah um i love walking in it so it was like it was like grilled chicken or something she goes can you ask your mom if this is good so i text my mom hey is the chicken in the fridge good and she goes no like exclamation point but this is how jesus but she goes not for us it's for it's not good for you it's good for your stepdad because he plays by his own rules she's going he'll eat what out he's like a garbage disposal so she's like he'll eat it but you shouldn't eat it wow yeah yeah i'm surprised the piece keeps it in there even that long doesn't

just put the kibosh on it for everybody because my mom it's out he plays by his own rules so it's like he'll be like what happened to the chicken and i think she just knows at this point just leave the fucking chicken if he eats it he eats if he gets sick he gets sick that's so garbage yeah leftovers she said how that's the rules we play by well no it's not good for us but for this one guy can eat it yeah what the cutlets in here yeah from fucking yeah from the 80s that's a good are you garbage question have you ever got food poisoning at your house oh man i feel like i live with food at the rate my bowel movements are liquid something's happening and it has been for 20 years not at the folies i'll say that right now this broad's got i've been on the planet 45 years

45 years not one person food poisoning ever oh yeah no i was being i was kind of joking but said he had the runs yeah i'm just saying that was more about my diet all together i say yeah yeah i apologize it's okay i wasn't i wasn't i wasn't taking shots at patty i didn't think you were what would you what what rating like restaurant restaurant rating would you give your kitchen like a b c my kitchen at home or my parents i think it's too mean to do parents my mom gets an a yeah my mom gets an a i close my place down c minus i would need an inspector who plays ball for sure yeah no shit somebody on the take give him a patreon subscription going out the door the fruit flies alone would close us down yeah we're good with it sometimes we just let it go like

sometimes it just gets away from let it ride yeah yeah it's a great part of being an adult sure that's what that's what then you clean it again that voting you know whatever sometimes you don't have to do the dishes i didn't mean to make it weird with the uh with the food poisoning thing no it's just i'm just gonna yes and um it's fine thank you you don't need to apologize i want to apologize i was just like yeah i get diarrhea all the time you're like nothing not 45 years not once in my mom ever do anything we're all ever i get like that sometimes as you know oh man sometimes yeah sometimes you go down fucking like the more attention you draw to it the worst it gets i don't know i don't know where we're going here yeah you see what this next question

is like do you love your parents you should have a bitch i'll kid you you know what i wanted to ask you were you ever a pallbearer as a kid because i feel like i was too many times yeah well they were like this one's sturdy get him um not not as a kid you that defined you as garbage if you were a pallbearer if you were like 1314 carrying someone out trash a tough look that means it means there was a means there was an accident or a tragedy i remember being a paul you're not carrying your pop-up out when you're 13 i remember like cousins or like you know like like older cousins that like you called uncle i remember fucking bringing a few of them to the promised land really as like a as like a 13 14 year old kid and they're getting like whacked out by an uncle

you know what i mean like to the point where i knew it i like i knew the drill i don't need the guys at the fucking funeral home to tell me what to do if i can stand side pull it out i've i've only done it a handful of times i think uh fully i'll move over move a casket up a staircase like a couch you're like an eastern european you got it strapped on your back hey fully that hey henry the elevator's over here i don't need a witness days what do you guys got a maderson there i can move that one i'll take this one myself boys won't you guys go catch a smoke by the muzzle lamb muzzle by the muzzle lamb you get one of those you gotta have cash to get those no probably not get one of those and they're like james dean i had to do the shirt i had to do

somebody uh got cremated and i had to like the six of us like fake what like you pushed it we had to do that but just like real weird what's it on it's on like a you know a serving tray not a that's a bad look it's on like a fucking you take the top off marty who's got a lighter i gotta like the stern is uncle denny is served this past weekend uh oh god this is going to get dark oh shit i saw we were going down the cremation lane oh like this is tough people say tish pish weekend i cremated you buddy i didn't not personally i paid for it i wasn't throwing the coal in the oven but i they they threw holy water on it's just in a box sure

and they threw holy water and i was like come on put a coaster down man you sustain that thing it's really good who's got pledged i didn't put i didn't put any lacquer on this thing oh Jesus um that in the same vein of ever being uh fucking paul bears a kid is funny this has ever been to your parents wedding which we've talked about i have i've been to my dad's wedding yeah tough that's bad yeah yeah it's real it's not classy it's not a classy thing i would say it's 50 50 that one of those people aren't your real parent but that does that make sense that's more logical than it'd be weird if your parents if you were there and your parents were getting married i feel like i know somebody who who had a kid well why weren't they together to begin with

they were together but then he's didn't get married until after they had the kid that's a little creep that's a little that's more suspect than a second marriage i don't know that's kind of no it's not how about this i knew a kid whose parents got divorced they both got step parents they got married those divorced the original parents got back together and then the step parents got married what that's a real sophie's choice he lives on general hospital yeah what the fuck that linked to north carolina god damn that's a fucking maybe we should screw that's weird i've never had any there's a fucking flying here that i'm pretty sure came out of your fucking armpit no but i had a spider in my car last week that scared the fuck you might as well had a gun

where's the mcdonald's fatty dude i looked over a little fat one dude like fat had a little purple on him his fucking eyes were just mugging me and i was like what are you doing i fucking pushed him out the window rolled the window up that was that was last turn around he's driving the car that listen that was last week we had to go to my aunt's funeral we were in pennsylvania two days ago we pull up to the cemetery i look outside the window my girlfriend's like oh my god there's a spider out there i'm like that's him he's been in my car dude there's no way this was a different spider he looked he could have been on peyote or something no he was in the car and he wanted money and he wanted the goods was like are you my uber

are you here for henry it's scared the shit out of me um how do we start talking about spiders i don't know the fly that came out of your arm oh yeah there's flies in here that's like an omen oh yeah that you smell we gotta get out of this month i got me i got a june first baby here we go we gotta get out of this let pager and start processing some of those fucking digits a couple of things start falling through um let's see this one this is from haywood jablomi uh don't think that's his government name i like it and this is something i've never heard of uh if i would say haywood's good haywood's a great name it's a real name right haywood like yeah haywood johnson sure haywood jablomi that's great it's a good piece of business you kids out there

and know what they're doing um if i were to say what is it i've never heard of this do you understand do you know what rotten ronnie's is rotten ronnie's rotten ronnie's what's a rotten ronnie's do you know rotten ronnie's no i can't get over haywood jablomi real highbrow stuff we're doing over here um rotten ronnie's is a nickname for mcdonald's oh okay rotten ronnie's yeah i could see it pretty good i never heard of that sure ronald ronnie rotten ronnie's a little slanderous against a great corporation but other than that uh what's the person's question ever swipe milk crates from the back of a rotten ronnie's wow wow we used to take them from wow for skating you would like try to ollie them or like you know we use them or like in the woods when we go smoke weed or build

a fort or whatever we we took a lot of milk crates just throwing a lot of milk crates in my life never would think in a million years to go look at a fucking rotten ronnie's what the fuck was going on in your town i don't know that's where your main supply of milk was coming through that's that's a tough look yeah you go to an arby's like a gentle love of milk crate let me tell you that right now records this that anything you ran out you ran out of examples after a record and you don't have a record player love milk crates records other things more stuff miscellaneous things whatever chotsky yeah you have yet to name one more noun uh baseball cards baseballs

what are you a pitching coach baseballs dude generic sports equipment other things other things you find under your bed toys transformers could be one skateboards baseball mix oh my god you are another kind of stupid dude i used to i i had a couple we used to put them in there i've seen dj's with fucking with sense of sense of humor is usually a good signifier of intelligence

you're you're the perfect amount of dumb and funny it's crazy it's so crazy i'm saying you're very funny but also very dumb i put stuff in there my head hurts you don't have them in your apartment now no i couldn't go away with it now keep in the bed up take a hell of a lot stronger i've been made to that i've been made a fucking plutonium get elon miskin there i can work on that shit uh my head hurts yeah from a bakery or something like that not fucking rot ronnie's um oh you don't need to eat there sir tell you that right now all right this one's from dylan have you built this country have you ever attended a car race at a dirt track raceway this falls more into me we were i was a racetrack kid going up unfortunately

you were a low-level racetrack kid that's not like you were out fucking in the main lawn at talladega no we were hanging out with fucking juniors wife yeah we were fucking you were in some shit hole in the middle of pennsylvania now flemington new jersey even better but uh my stepdad used to race cars and it was exciting to watch him but i would the main attraction the big thing i would get buddies to come with me and the big selling point was the fucking derb was the smash him up derby what that open for them that that's the closer the tracks the tracks mayhem after that yeah no shit so it was an actual race it wasn't like a square where you just fucking cram into each other this was an actual race so there was some fucking you could like

slam into each other dude they would just drop like a dead car in the middle the they would first of all they would soap up the track with suds they would they had a like a fucking tank like a water tank machine and then they would actually do like races on there afterwards that seems dangerous yeah so you want to fucking smash them up baby that's not like your your stepdad did real real races yes and then the last one was the smash them up derby or you would think even just putting soap on that track it wouldn't come off for the next race well i mean this is this isn't up to nascar fucking i mean they're trying to get asses in the seats here okay that's the fucking it's you know i mean they got the oakridge right yeah rusty walls isn't coming in on the weekend

they they need to they need to fucking they need to sell some merchandise can a gopatric here yet yeah so they would soap up the fucking there would be a some fucking hillbilly some redneck with a fucking like a fire hose and a clown nose yeah with like a thing a palm olive oh no but it really suds this fucking course up and it was a proper fucking track suds did up and they would drop like dead cult like you know abandoned cars so you'd have to fucking maneuver around them and these fucking tanks would come out already causing accidents yeah buddy i was a fucking i was right up in turn one screaming hooting and hollering oh i'd imagine that'd be dangerous for the crowd or something it would do it was the 90 i mean somebody nobody gave a fuck about

anybody got bumped off out there oh yeah i'm sure somebody got whacked with a piece of funnel cake in their mouth yeah yeah yeah caught a fire stone that ahead yeah i think i don't think it's open anymore um but i would totally like fucking gillis and six and those dudes they go out to like central pennsylvania do the dirt track oh yeah the quarter i think they call like quarter midgets with like the big fucking wing on the top uh huh that's a dude that in that fucking case of course light or something that's a good fucking time i want to go to a monster truck show to be honest i'll go let's do it we're definitely gonna go yeah we have to we gotta find out what they are though that's the only thing they do in wild would grave diggers on the beach we can go down there

that's crazy yeah i think i can meet him yeah is it the same driver no there's multiple trucks oh really he's not taking that down the expressway i mean there's a multiple grave digger trucks it's a national brand oh it's not just one car i would argue there's i mean we can like big foot's not big foot was the best classic blue fucking pickup nice how many grave diggers are there how many was the first thing that pops up 41 grave diggers 41 grave diggers yeah oh bill ripped off seven trucks currently competing yeah that's a fucking circuit like a team well you're not going for the you're going for the truck you're not going for the driver so someone's in akron ohio at one and then another one's in phoenix you're telling me grave diggers

like blue man group yes yeah that's that's just like crushed a dream i didn't even know i respect yeah no shit so how many as google how many big foot's there are there's only one big foot i guarantee it no way it's the same fucking model you think the big foot people just google it right you think the big foot people will radar you think the big foot people were looking around going these grave digger guys are making seven times the money is me do you get it oh yeah am i in the van no for mash radar riley how many what is it grave diggers yeah chuckle out of the kid how many grave diggers are there is that what i asked no grave diggers big foot i'm gonna get that 90s grave digger shit go 80s big foot well there's many theories that there might be there are currently a squad

yeah they're currently five competing big foot five yeah with six full-time drivers and two fill-ins 20 trucks have been made since the debut in 1975 okay okay i'd love to know what that fill-in does on the side something's shifting know what tires are using over there on the big on the big foot good years fire stones good years are for bozos okay i got firestones you got firestones on the latitude a latitude with the attitude aren't you think i'll run a fucking grave digger anything screw underneath them hit him in the balls who do you think would win in a dirt track race between three of us in our in our call you don't have a license so you're out you don't need one um you're on your board i probably would he's a horrible driver hold on are we in cars

that we don't care about yes oh come on i mean being that he proper stops at green lights i don't think you're gonna you're not a good rubber hits the road baldy i ain't gonna be worried about that i know for a fact and you're a legacy too imagine me beating you in front of your stepdad ah he'd be pissed junior you take junior away from you i know for a fact i chop in his car he still got it smoke both of you know now how could you know that you don't even know where the gas pedal is yeah i've driven what makes you think that you would beat us because i'm naturally good at shit like that now driving if you want to get real trashy how to go car growing up was big big into go karts we go to ocean city maryl it was like we like it was like a thing well my cousin i

would i'll get out of this guy i'm putting my money on kippy yeah let's go base of thunder you know what i mean go rubbing is racing fucking trade and paint if you have access to a track yeah and it really let me on it without a license i mean what would we race each other do times like qualify times i i mean if someone had okay i'm putting it out there in the cars i got used both no way he wouldn't even fit in it sitting on top listen this is going out to you know a lot of people tens of thousands of people if somebody has access to a fucking dirt track anywhere in the country we'll fucking come out and we'll do and we got to use your car we got to use up they're not gonna let us use your their car you can rent this shit it's like yeah these hillbillies let us do anything

cash talks um we'll we'll figure we'll do like a qualify we'll do right well you're not gonna fit in a fucking race car i'll get in there in a couple you barely fit in your jeep all right no comeback for that in the middle of a weight loss challenge um bell's gonna toll right after this too yeah he had a fight you just had like a bacon egg and cheese before i'm like it's a weigh in i'm eating one one meal a day do they make see public centers for bucket seats i'll bring the ones from the plane airline airline yeah aircraft grade i got my own helmet um if you have some sort of or any i guess any sort of race track there's like they have them in they have them in fucking in ranger's we can go do them they have like the

proper they call it like the autobahn or something though they have them they have them up at uh ridgefield or where's levity live i just blacked out dude i just blacked out you're stumbling over your words a lot more with that shirt on you're in like you're you're in half retirement mode i'm fucking starving myself me and t-bone have a weight loss challenge this fucking guy tells me he lost five pounds in three days he's grieving by the way which is cheating salt tears that's fucking god i'm over here starving myself fucking doing coffee and burnies i'm fucking wire i'm starving too um starving you had a croissant in a bag of chips literally 47 minutes ago it's moved through me my engine's running these days i'm out i'm a little more active i'm turning and burning

talking about race car to put a pin in it if you got access to a to a racetrack and are willing to look the other way on some paperwork on some driver's license numbers talk to the boys a couple of floozy track girls wouldn't kill us either yeah a couple of girl to drop the anchor chip in the middle oh yeah that's what i'm talking um my mom would love to do that really oh she'd be out there really showing the goods did that was was was drag racing ever a thing when you were in high school and stuff no we used to go down to like essington ave and feel i never i was all scared of that shit i never i thought that shit was stupid and i never did that shit there was this one kid wane he's gotta be dead for sure dude that's kid this kid fast talk about fast and loose

wane pushed it oh man he was like he was a kind of guy you were just like what the fuck i i kept him at a day and i i ran with some nefarious characters and this kid was just like your radar's up right away yeah we had a couple of dudes like that he would go down racing with my boy and like they would go down with them and they would like spin out i'm like well it was like fast and furious dropped and we were in high school so that was like that was big people in a parking lot doing donuts and shit that stuff was lame i tried in my 96 Chevy lumina oh god didn't work front of chicks yeah strike out be wearing that shirt hey see you guys eat her again that's mean i don't know how that's supposed to make me feel

whoo all right let's let's power through a couple more we gotta get it up please i love this one from tony p homer and have a question tony p ever swimming public in jean shorts i can't say i've ever swam in denim on purpose maybe falling in a pool getting thrown in a pool or something but never on fucking purpose that was a great time to pull away from the fucking microphone for 30 seconds that was my ears rich and that's throwing people in the pool his garbage that was big oh that was huge yeah huge there was no cell phones well we have we had cell high school cell phones can't everybody had their own cell phones you had to be like oh the big thing was i had to come up with a way to get the cell phone out of their pocket so you'd be like

my parents used to do that to each other yeah because they're fucking hill like it's like my my cut they would throw each other in the pool remember the one kid that was like no fun he would like be like holding on to the fence or whatever it's like i'll break the fence you're like relax we're wearing bathing suits here take it easy fucking chuck whatever your name was i was always a kid who was on the like you know exalt an auxiliary player he wasn't on the squad he always got called up from the miners remember one time it works a big foot fill in yeah he's the alternate driver one time it was okay god damn dude you might have to snip a little bit of that sometimes i think you forget your broadcasting

i want to and people go you get mad at henry sometimes i go yeah because i hit him in the ball and he's over there eating a ham sandwich i was taking to my story which wasn't very funny he's about throwing a kid in a recyclable thing full of glass we didn't do it but we had him when we were swinging he's like no don't do it yeah like what you're saying freaking out but it was you know shards of glass that would have surely ripped him to shreds look like a wolverine got him all right this one's from nicholas new patron first question ever install an aftermarket cup holder in your car those are next level trash when you gotta like hook it into something like another basketball

yeah like hooks on to something yeah that's really you know what else is really trashy too the ash tray that would go in the cup holder that you would ash in that it would have you've ever seen that no it was like a big it looked like this it looked like the wah wah cup and then this would be like a cylinder like a funnel with a hole in it and you would ash in that and then put it in no way the people that had that always had the fucking the air the the things on the vents with the juice in them the air fresheners hit the bricks that was for fucking russians or something I didn't know what that was no way dude you got in your car and you had one of you had fucking cherry sauce blasting at me you better be an uber driver in Uzbekistan take a hike with

that shit stunk now get me a tree or a fucking I used to smoke things to kill that stuff dude I'm for a minute my mom had ones that fans on them oh they were yeah the glade plug-ins it's like this is for your basement this is for places that have mold and not the fucking not your air conditioner telling it's telling a jet engine firing up yeah for breeze I think or somebody did the little oils and you're like what are we doing yeah you know it's the trash it smells like the fucking janitor's closet you know it's the trashiest air freshener it's the old school one and we had them when we were kids god where it's the jelly inside and you you pull it up and it's like a cone of jelly you know what I'm talking about I still try

doing those and my wife was like and it eats away at it when those things dry up it was like a civil war soldier that was left out under a tree just like mummified yeah the glade you twist the cone and pull it up but they were the things like I would like reuse it it was called reuse and I would just fucking rip it open oh yeah you don't fucking you don't work the governor on that you fucking high and dry baby man those things got real sad those things those smelled like urinal cakes you walked into your house right away you're a smell like you were in the fucking you were in the john no those things those things stunk and I thought they were great I thought I was gonna like show my wife like look what we got over here she's like what the fuck it no way are we doing that

yeah I really thought I was like check these things out sometimes I don't realize how trashy I am I think I'm classy man you had those things and you were a kid you're like poking at it and playing with it that and the little thing like a little dirt ball did you ever lick it yeah I mean he was looking at his deodorant I don't believe so only on holidays July 4th would come around um it's it's crazy that that's like a legitimate question apples and cinnamon all bets were off that apples and cinny my mom stills once the fall hits it's all apples and cinnamon not those things no candles whatever yeah walking to my mom's house you feel like you're walking into fucking same I'll never forget dude shout out to Yankee fucking sugar cookies dude that thing we had one in

college I felt like I was a Keebler elf dude that thing was cooking dude fucking Yankee candles forget it those things that put you to sleep they're also like 55 claims about drifting away those things are bangers yeah um all right let's do one more and this first of all the name is super funny because it's something that's this is from shh shh shmarded um and I'm for sure stealing this ever call getting a bunch of apps for the table sprinkling the infield that is fucking and that's the kind of quality questions we're looking for around here at Tooties sprinkled the infield a little bit get a couple get a couple of fucking apps that's great sprinkled the infield I've never heard it refer to as that but that's fantastic oh yeah because I'm a big fan of that walk in

sprinkled the infield a couple of fucking apps for the table let's get things started real quick while we're looking over the menu let's get muscles we'll do one red one right we'll do the tomato salad anybody want the clams you want oyster you want this you want that bring it we just did I went down with my mom's it was it was my mom's birthday we went out McGurk's Horsham and Horsham there's another one yeah um this is a meter central meeting point but fucking big table had like 15 people to talk about sprinkle in the infield yeah it was like Blitzkrieg with appetizers they were dropping them things every on the minute some like fucking flatbreads were going some fucking fries some of this some of that little edamame oh edamame at McGurk's real nice

look at you down there it's been a couple of blessing it up yeah all right gang we love you very much thank you for everything we'll be back next week uh June 18th at Linux City New Jersey yes we have an 830 show all right they opened up about 30 more tickets for the 830 show it's gonna go there's not gonna be a 1030 show we want it all combined into one great fucking show yeah so there's more tickets June 18th at Linux City get on that fucking grab some ticks also uh the fourth and final show in Chicago is on Tuesday of that week I believe it's the 22nd Tuesday the 22nd there's a 9 p.m show there's still tickets available available for that get those fucking ticks ASAP also indie baby we're talking indie helium comedy helium comedy club Wednesday the 23rd

yes get those fucking tickets as well also people are hitting me up they don't know what's on sale we have Boston on sale we have the stress factory New Jersey on sale we have Baltimore Maryland Magoobies on sale coming to Magoobies we have Cleveland Hilarides on sale we have Columbus on sale we got Providence we got Providence on sale and we're adding a bunch more dates as well down we're gonna get everywhere people are hitting me up hey do shows here do shows here we're gonna be doing New York we're gonna be doing Philly we're gonna be doing Pittsburgh we're gonna be doing Texas we're gonna be coming to Florida Pacific Northwest everywhere baby West Coast we're doing it so just hang tight we're waiting on all the restrictions and shit to change so we can uh

well so we can let our beaks make it worth our while you know what I mean that's right we'll have something out soon with everything on it and all that stuff maybe and real quick real quick I want to give a big shout out to John in the Facebook group organized a bunch of people who donated uh like about that Johnny Griffin 1500 bucks to the American Cancer Society in Sam's name so thank you so much everybody yeah you guys are rock solid your absolute um fantastic support system we love you we appreciate you we'll see you next week