Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast - Turning Up the Heat! w/ Ian Fidance

Episode Date: March 9, 2026

Are You Garbage presents comedian and podcast host Ian Fidance! You know Ian Fidance from stand up comedy, Bein' Ian with Jordan, Kill Tony, The Joe Rogan Experience, The Adam Friedland Show, First Date, Stavvy's World, Your Mom's House, Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast, Harland Highway and so much more! Check out IAN DO: An Odd Guy Doing Odd Jobs! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! NEW AYG MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ AYG 2026 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: Aura Frames: https://auraframes.com Promo Code: GARBAGE BetterHelp: Your emotional wellbeing matters. Find support and feel lighter in therapy. Sign up and get 10% off at https://BetterHelp.com/garbage Promo Code: garbage Liquid I.V.: Subscribe and save 30% off on better hydration at https://LIQUID-IV.COM/GARBAGE Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Merch alert, baby. Merch alert, merch alert, merch alert, and the quality is going through the roof, as they say. Hooking. Gang, do yourself a favor. Get over to RUGarbage.com. We got hats, we got shirts, got mugs, we got key chains. We got, we got wall art.

We got paintings you can buy. Go check it out. Are you Garbage.com limited supply list. Do it. Yeah. Hey, everybody out there. And welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is RU Garbage.

Oh, yeah. It's that little show. We sit down with your favorite comedians. And we find that it to be classy. Yeah. Just a big old piece of trash. Garbage. I'm your host, Kate Chully, coming at you on a beautiful day.

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Shout out to everybody for tuning in. We fucking love you. Please make sure you review, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube, full video available over there on Spotify, and the boys are climbing to charts. Get your fucking Warner Ladders out and start climbing a chart. Then obviously the greatest website of all time, www.

www. Patreon.com slash our garbage over there and get all that bonus content gang. We got the merch. We got the new merch. We got the tickets on sale. Uh-huh. Got the Patreon. Uh-huh.

The bad haircut. And we couldn't be more excited that we're incredibly, and I mean incredibly special guests back with us again today. He's goddamn family at this point. He's got a brand new series over there on YouTube that absolutely no one is talking about. But they should be. That's a dickhead. I'm sorry.

What kind of intro is that? That's mean. That's very mean. Give it up for Ian. Jonah Hill sometimes finance, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you. You're just going to saffty's brothers movie?

What? Fuck. You're starting already. No, I'm not. Listen, Foley is a little on edge because he broke his CPAP machine and he hasn't gotten a good night's sleep since the fuck Reagan administration. Dude, you came in. That thing looks like...

His table's wobbling again. That thing looks like an overhead projector out there. You're leaning on it. Jesus Christ. This is actually a brand new table. God damn brand new table. And he broke it again. Ian, thank you for coming in.

Thank you guys for coming. I feel fantastic. You know, I'm Pete. You didn't. You were an hour late and you were bitching that you didn't want to come out. That's, I said I didn't want to come out, but I didn't sleep because I got my back piece done last night. I was at the tattoo shop.

Is that what you call it? So. What? Are you that? You're not going to give me that? Are we going to do this? That's what they're called getting cummed on these days? Hey, I'm into it.

That's how you heal the tattoo. No, I got my back piece on last night. I was in the shop. How many times do you think he's going to say back piece? Yeah. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. Would you get a butterfly tramp stand?

No, it's, it goes from my shoulders down to my ass cover and my whole entire back. Did they knock you out for this? No, the fucking red dragon? It's wide. I got full his face. They said you don't have enough real issue. We're going to wrap it around to the front. It's to scale.

Yeah. It's one to one. He's got a brand new series on YouTube. Everybody's excited about it. Congratulations. Thank you. It's odd guy doing odd shit. Ian do.

An odd guy doing odd job. Ian loves putting his name in things. Which it's good marketing. And Foley loves putting his name in things. Are you garbage? And we're back. Anyway, the show is great. And it's so fun.

We're excited. To be here. It's doing well. Looks like it's doing well. It's doing great. It's doing fantastic. Partnered with YM.H. They're losing money.

They are. I heard they're out. Bleeding money. You got to watch. You got to share. If it doesn't pop up in a little bit, bye-bye funding. And, dude, it's so funny because I talked about it on here.

Sure. Yeah. And we were like, oh, God. This is ever going to happen. Well, I've been working on it for a year. I've been filming it out of pocket for a year. And thank you out there to the AIG fans, best fans in the world.

guys were messaging me, emailing me, and I got out to some jobs because of the pod that contacted me, and I've been out, and then now I have a ton of people hit me up. I just put out an episode today where I did Terry Blacks, all these people. I mean, just, I'm a man of the people. Who doesn't love you? I did. Thank you. The guy in my mirror. I am going to, I'm going to partner up with AEW All Elite Wrestling, and I'm going to go and do a. Very nice. Is that the one Billy Corrigan owns? I don't know. I don't think so.

I, anyway. He owns a wrestling thing. I don't know. Sorry. All right. Well, you don't have to bring him up just because I look like a rat in a cage. That's pretty good. Can I tell you today is the greatest day?

What's up with the beard? You're a little fluffy. Is it? It's just big. It's thicker than usual. I've been debating if I should trim it down. And I'm worried about doing it and mess. You look heavier.

You look very young Spielberg. I'm saying it's not in a little. That's rich. What? What? You called me heavy? I said heavier. I didn't say you're going to heavy.

He's probably skinnier than you now. Are you? What do you weigh? This is a fat suit. 71. What do you weigh? What the fuck is this? No, like 205.

That's good. Yeah, I know. How much have you lost? It's supposed to be my God. What do you fuck? I thought we were sandbagging it. What do you weigh? I wait 370.

Yeah. Well, you weigh 205, but you're not counting that 370 tumor. Who've attached to you? Mine grew hair and teeth. Just hair, actually. If you zoom in, there's no teeth. Also, Ian's look like you got dressed in as... Fuck!

Yeah. I have to wear... What's going on with the look? You're like the pie bosh. Where did you get that shirt? I got a... This is lost and found. Boom, got it.

My friends fan, Haywire, Boston Harkwar all day. They're great. You should check him out. Fantastic. I did an Ian do episode. You're dressed like a homeless guy getting a job interview. Well, why do you think I'm here? Right?

I'm literally looking for jobs. Does anybody have a collared shirt I can win? You look like a brilliant homeless guy. That's about to beat me in chess. About to turn MIT on its head. I know. I look like I play like the violet on the street. And then, you know, I get to the actual concert.

I'm just yelling slurs. I have to wear sweatpants and a sweatshirt and have it breathed because my back is covered in bandage. What the fuck is happening? Jesus, get the CPAP. By the way, he's on the phone like a, like a fucking auctioneer trying to negotiate his CPAP. He's like, $9.409400.

$900 is not a lot of money for the machine that keeps you alive. That's crazy. I'm talking about you. You spent that alone on cold cuts this month. Yeah, I know. Well, the thing keeps breaking because it's out of water. You're putting grease in it. My deep friar's broken.

You're on the phone with fry daddy? I heard the guy go, Mr. Foley, it's not an air friar. It ruined my chicken wings. And I'm not losing any weight either. I got to have breathable clothes because my back is so covering. You're wearing a fucking collared shirt. What are you talking about? It's a large college shirt.

Where'd you get the collared shirt? I have a ton of collared shirt. In the summertime, you know. When I drove a cab in the 1970. Nobody reacts. You know. I'm not accusing you of not having collared shirt. Please.

That collard shirt is very dated. Please. Yes. In the summers, I wear a button. And it's covered advantages. Because I was going to shower this morning and come all ready to show. But I slept through my alarm because I was up all night in pain, going to the bathroom because I need to be full of fluids to keep my skin breathing. It's a whole process.

Shout out Tony Kaplan, R&D tattoo, the best, the only tattoo shop in New York. He gave you a deal, obviously. Yeah, look at you, huh? It was no CPAP machine, but he cooked me up. I don't get it. Because you wouldn't be shouting him out if he didn't. No, no, no. I shot them.

Well, yeah, they give me... No, but yeah, they give me a thing. No, I've been going to the shop for like five years, so I'm all buds with them now. Can you get rid of? No, I'm like a... I'm the tumor. And I... No, they're great.

They do great work. They're the best shop in town. They're better than everyone else. Reasonable prices. Fantastic work. You might as well be reading for... Clip-D tattoo, Ridgewood Queens. Yes.

Yes. Go out and see him and tell him your old pal E. Yeah. Now, check it out. What's let me say? Holy shit. Shit. Yeah, dude.

I better be Henna. It looks like the Red Dragon. Four and a half hours. You got a lady with a set of canes on it. I know. I had to make them make her boobs less big. But you see, it's a grim reaper holding a woman because the debt is always on my back. And women will be the debt to me.

What? Talk about a guy looking for an identity. That's crazy, dude. What are you talking about? I've been one of a back piece forever. Backpiece. Count it. I'm covered in tattoos from the front.

Yeah, that's a lot. Are you going to get that colored in or whatever? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it's like a process. Four and a half hours. I pass out at the end. Fainted. So did he.

All that had conversation. Part of the show? No, I watched a movie and FaceTimes and stuff. Yeah, look. Isn't that great? Yeah, a little buck crack, too. Thanks, I know. Open for business.

Yes, yes. And then underneath the smoke, they're going to put exit only. Is that true? I'm off guys. All right. And I don't bought them. Okay. I don't know I do

Hey with a good time Can I tell you I finally ate she crab soup I thought of you nice fucking amazing Amazing where'd you have incredible Grand Central Newark yeah Oh it's that oyster bar yeah Yeah that's a good spot

I went over there I went on a date It was nice we went to the whispering tunnel And then we also his butthole went to Train coming every nine minutes Don't touch me Give me back. You guys stink. All right, huh?

He lost the weight, but not the timing. Let's go. Speaking of things that you have and you, whatever this is. Remember I bought you a Christmas gift? Now, what do you have to show us here? I bought you a Christmas gift. If this is some of your skin, I'm going to be upset.

It finally, it finally arrived. It's my bandages for my back piece. And this is what I got for KJ. It's a, oh, it was a gift for the baby. Chappie wrap. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. Okay. Your coffee has a hair in it, by the way. I visibly see that.

That's mine. Yeah. Oh, that's so cute. Philly's colors, and it says what? I don't know. We're going to open it up. It says Lil Prince of Garbage. Oh, that's very nice. And I can't go empty-handed for the big man.

No shit. So I got you something. At Ridgewood tattoos. Yes, I got you a gift certificate. For a back piece. For you with the cat. That's very nice. So then when the cat's not around, you can look at a picture.

Thanks. That was in, he packaged this up. That was at your house. Yeah. That was for sure. It's got catnip in it. It's a regift. That's very nice.

Thank you. Yeah. Thanks. Mm-hmm. Sweat shirt, sweat pants, bad idea. Sweating already. Yeah, you're like breathable material. You show up looking like you're cut and wait for a wrestling match.

Yeah, take your stuff. Well, you're the one calling me heavy. I said you'll, take your shirt off. I said you'll look. I don't want you hot the whole episode. Take your pants off. I'll tell. Mm.

Mm. No, I'm trying to wear breathable clothing, so I don't have tight stuff. There's nothing about that that's breathing. It's loose. It's loose. Yeah, but it's not really beautiful. Do you guys fiber, the fabric? You know anything about fashion?

Are you that rich? You just run the heater up. First of all, Foley went back to Bluebell. Came home with the summer collection on. Dude, that thing, that shirt. Where did you just get back from surfing camp? That's got Cabana wear. What hell is that?

This is 2019. George. No, that's an 89 Caldor. Okay. Yeah, they fit. Barely. Yeah. This is from the neon tent collection.

They don't fit. Coleman. Oh, my God. Got this from Yetty. Thanks, boy. Yep, yep, yep. Two people had to put it on me. Are you going to be hot?

Yeah, I might take it off in a little bit. It's all right. Pop the top off. I don't know why you guys run the heat so hot in here. We don't. It's fucking New York City. I mean, what are you fucking conned? This is crazy.

Just because your heat was cut off years ago. It was in December. It wasn't cut off. It broke. Really? Yeah. How many letters did the city get? I got into it.

You probably milked a couple of months with that. With the landlord's boyfriend who's a maintenance guy. We got into it. You've been living there for like 20 years. I know. Why do you think? My rent is fucking controlled. It's called squad as rights.

Yeah. You know you you're there for a month. he got mail sent to you, it's yours. He's quoting some law from 1432. Actually, in the Providence of New Amsterdam. This was this land. Where do you lay your head is technically your land was promised to me. He's in there quoting Vickis, Gordon Wood.

All right. I wish that joke would have worked. It should have. You guys suck today. No, we don't. Yeah, you stepped on my red dragon joke. Honestly, because you tried it over there. Now.

I didn't try it over there. I was doing my seat. Why is the heat so hot in here, though, for real? I don't know. It's, like, crazy. I might have to crack a door. It is. Luke, it is crazy.

Also, all that ink could be fucking sopping into your brain, and you could be having a show. I'm getting tattoo flu. Listen, by the way, huh? Tattoo flu? You can get tattoo flu. After you get a back piece. A couple days after you get a big tattoo. Yeah, we got a unique.

Hey, are you zipping for a second. Can you tell me what is the heat on currently? Listen. I guarantee. It's like 77. We don't set it. It's a radiator. In 1918, there was a huge Spanish flu, and they crank the heat, and you don't have control over it.

What? Yeah, that's why the heat's so hot. What? Yes. Because of the Spanish flu? Yes. Why? Google it.

We're cold. Table man. Ask, as Google, if heat, if radiators in New York run hot because of the Spanish flu. And if that's the case, I will suck your dick on camera. Ask Google if he can come pick up Ian. Ian, did you have more teeth put in on the bottom? What's going on? It looks like there's an earthquake in a graveyard.

Holy shit. Earthquake in a graveyard. That's pretty good. Henry Foley, on the board. Yeah, that's too specific for that to be wrong. All right. Whip it out. You also probably knew that.

You probably told him last week. Check the receipts. Hey, if your seat peps broken, I'll blow you right now. Do guys know more about it. If you're dressed like a fat extra in a 1990s Disney movie about surfing, I'll blow you. You can't surf the big tuna man.

Probably the guy that hangs out on the beach but doesn't serve. If you're waiting for a callback on a remake of heavyweights, I'll blow you. Stop being a dick, Ben Stiller. I mean, that is a, I mean, it is a wild color choice for a 50-year-old man. That's all I'm saying.

Are you 50? 50? No. Just have my birthday. When? Last week. That's a birthday gift. Happy birthday, your cat's dad.

Happy birthday. Look at all the bad choices you made. Dude, we talked about it on Patreon. We went out to dinner, dude. His birthday party sucked. So bad. What happened? It was me, him, new guy Luke, Mark the shark, the new editor.

What was it fucking work? party? Rubinoff and Cassidy. Those are my friends. Where the fuck was my phone call? I called you when you didn't answer. When was this? Last year.

I've called you twice and you didn't answer. I've always called you back. Yeah, like five days later. Because I'm busy. Stealing. My landlord. I am busy with a lot of schemes. So it was a work party.

Not a work party. He doesn't have a lot of. He's not a social butterflip. Dude, can I tell you, can I tell you moments like that is so sad? I got arrested and my call was to the seller to tell them I couldn't make my spot because I can't make my $1.45. But I'll still need the $50 pay. And I'll be by to pick up my wings once I post bail.

Shut up and laugh at that. That was the funniest thing you've ever heard. Who else is going to, who else am I going to call? Cats can't pick up a phone. Man, I am surrounded by the losers. By the way, you just did Connix Unleased. I did. Thank you, Byron.

Somebody should have put you back on a leash. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Byron, Allen. Dude. What was your lead in? I heard one of you did a cat story. Yeah, I talked about cats.

I talked about being single. I talked about my mom. The lady who were on there with didn't seem amused by it. Dude, can it, you know, it was. It was fucked up because we sat down and they told me. How do you spell Ian? I was going like third. And he starts a show and he looks at me and he calls me some other guy's name.

Well, dude, I made a joke You on a DL? I made a joke I was like, I think I said like I'm bisexual And when you look like me You gotta take what you can get Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up with that.

The crowd was like, huh? And Byron was like, pause. It was no boy, no. You do that freaky-dicky shit over here. You do whatever you want it, you have. You clean it up on you fucking UPN 57 I tried to shake his hand, he wouldn't. I was like, Jesus Christ, I've been tested.

He gives you a pound, not playboy. Yeah. He's like Denzel Washington in Philadelphia. Hold on, let's watch it. Oh, did you drink out of this? Ian, he ain't right. On this episode of a lot of time. Can we?

No. Greg Morton. Ian Fightance. Oh, really trying to pump up the dick. I jumped up in the air and did the WWF sockets and they edited it out of the show. Tonight on the show, Ian Finance in no way affiliated with NBC production. That's funny. What's a gig like that pay?

Tonight on Comics Unleash. You got Bengley, Blakemore, and Ian Fidance, and Vanessa Graddick. Nice. What's a gig like that pay? Not enough. For being the richest man in the world. Byron Allen owns the Weather Channel. Does well.

He kills it. You figured that'd be a Jewish guy anymore? Okay. Wow. Getting brave. Getting bold. Ian, you're not bottoming anymore. No.

Well, I do bottom from the top, Byron. And what that means? is uh... show back I gotta feed the fish real quick oh dude that that was that was the first joke I made fucking telling me what he was like he was like you're from New York and I go I am here

was supposed to be ganging up on him DP in him as they said he's up with you I don't know he's got the fucking schoolyard bully vibes with that hat backward yeah whatever really my god fuck your mom last night

do you have to get out of here because you have fifth grade picture day after this I don't want to miss the Texas Tommy's at lunch Go steal some nerds lunch money. Ian. By the way, give me everything you got. Cover up the bottom teeth. You look like a acidic Jew and hiding.

Well, that's why I'm late. I had to crawl out of the tunnel. Bad for me, bad for me. We'll be back next week, everybody. Byron, come on, nah. Gang, let's talk about aura frames. Orra, aura. Now, you might have heard us mention aura frames before.

About 15,000 times. As being the greatest gift. you could possibly get somebody in your life, I'm going to tell you one more time. You got Mother's Day coming up. You got Father's Day coming up. You got birthdays. You got weddings. You got this.

You got that. Do yourself a favor. Pick somebody up that you love an aura frame and they will love you forever. Yeah. Dump all them, all them pictures of the kid, the cat, the dog, your wife, scantily clad, tasteful nudes, whatever you got. You can dump on a frame.

You can pre-roll it. You can pre-load it for them. So when they get it, they open up a body, they plug it. Holy sure. Shit, there's Gary, spread eagle. Whatever you do it. You got free unlimited storage. You can personalize your gift.

You put a message, and can add a message before it arrives. The gift box is included. You share your photos and videos effortlessly. You just download the app, boom, put them up. How you know. It was named number one by wirecutter. You can save on the perfect gift by visiting orframes.com for a limited time. Listeners can get $35 off their best-selling carver mat frame.

Carver Matt. That's what I give the Carver, Matt. With the code garbage, that's or a A-U-R-A-Frams.com. Promocode garbage. Support the show by mention us and check out terms and conditions applied that. Gang, this episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. As you know, Kevin and I have started and continue our mental health journeys. It's a thing that's never over.

It's a thing that's never over. Talk therapy helps. BetterHelp is an absolute fantastic place to start. We love BetterHelp. If you got a big problem, you got a small problem, you just want to talk something out. BetterHelp can match you with a licensed therapist specifically to your needs. Yes. And also it's a take a time to celebrate women and all that they carry at work, relationships

and family and the many roles they hold every day. March is International Women's Day. And I got a new, I got a new mom at the house. Love them, broad. It is forever changed how I view all the women in my life who are mothers, not mothers, There's anything, it's very, you know, there's a lot of stress, a lot of, a lot goes on that I was not aware of. So our hat goes off to them broads out there. Shout out to you.

And listen, they need, you know, everybody, mental health affects everybody. That's all I'm trying to say. So if somebody needs a little help, you know, maybe not you're in the right direction, talk therapy. It's a very good tool. Your emotional well-being matters. Find support and find a light and feel lighter in therapy. Sign up. I get 10% off.

at BetterHelp.com slash garbage. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com slash garbage. Do it. What was your joke about the fish tank? Oh, I was like, yeah, I'm from New York, and actually this fish tank's making me miss home. It's bigger than my apartment.

And the crowd was like, no, what was the joke? Who's the crowd? Come on. No, fuck you. The crowd. Nope, throw your laptop. Not the fish tank. The crowd is paid audience members.

They've been there since like 1 p.m. Dude, they, they just broke motherfucker off the stage. Buku money. Buku money. Is it out in Los Angeles? Yeah. Filming out in L.A. Sherman Oaks.

Yeah. Sherman Oaks. Yeah. What's the crowd in the studio? Are they largely African American? Why would that be? Holy. More of an African American show, I would say, right?

I think that's fair to say, ladies gentlemen. Yeah. I don't think that's crazy. Yeah. No, it's not. I support the culture. It's got a black host. doesn't mean it's an African-American.

Well, Greg Morton was African-American. Oh, and the girl was black too. So statistically, I'm the minority. Then they got the weird all-white guy around that. You didn't know you're being set up? Dude, can I tell you, I was in the makeup chair? Oh, my God. I was in the makeup chair and they were-

For black guys. They were like four. I was like, come on, chow. Come on, she. He's got a hot comb in his hair. Cover me up. Why ain't you got a color in my complexion? So we're in the makeup chair.

We're in the back. It was running so late. Two hours late. I'm the last episode. You're right. It is an African-American show. So, dude, this woman on camera went off script, and Byron goes, and she's like this comic from Atlanta, and he goes off script, and he goes, so you have an interesting family, and

she goes, Byron, my brother is gay, and we think he has AIDS. And everyone was like, what? and the producer dropped her clipboard runs out and then the woman comes back after the show she goes oh my god I think I blacked out and I just started talking it was like oh you mean the AIDS thing she was like the AIDS thing

I'm like Jesus Christ what your brother's number by any chance You know I get tested and I'm clean What's the matter? This table is pushing forward All he was right about the table Why don't you dip into the CPAP fun I'm gonna fucking fix on the table Well I mean fucking

You're lined up like you're fucking doing the tush push. Yeah, but also, do you really think the table's not going to wobble when you're putting 500 pounds on it every time you lean over and laugh? Ooh, that was mean. First of all, I don't think he's laughed yet at anything you've said. We're good? Yeah. You know what, keep that in. Let him see how the sausages made.

Can we be friends? You guys got sausages? What? He pulls it out of his butt. Have you ever been to Keynes? Who are you by Renal? What is Keynes? That was a crazy segue.

I'm trying to bring us back. I know. That's where we went to dinner. So we went to dinner. King's Steakhouse. That's where fucking Foley's bad birthday party was. Why was it so bad? It looked like Dave Justin out of birthday party or so.

It was just like a bunch of old. I've been to one of those. I know. It was a bunch of old washed fucking comics. Dude, so what? Why was it bad vibe? Really? You get out of here.

Because I'm not drinking. I know. I'm proud of you. So these guys weren't really drunk. Now, can I tell you, bad move knowing that you're with a guy who's teetering on the edge. I'm not. Teetering on the edge. I'm fucking fine.

No, no. I'll fucking drink right now, dude. Do you think I care? I'll show you I don't got a problem. Bad move drinking around him. No, it's not. I think in early sobriety... I don't want that.

I know you don't... I want people to enjoy themselves. That makes me... I know. I want these guys to get fucked up. I know. I know. But in early sobriety, I'd cool it on the drinks around the guy for a minute.

Listen, okay. No. See? No. I told you. Without. Without making you feel as if you were like the odd man. We're not.

That makes you feel like the odd man. Just nobody order a drink and then afterwards maybe get a, maybe get a drink at the end. That is so not us. We drink. Ben, why was the vibe bad? Because they weren't drinking enough. No, no, no. Dude, before we left, he's like, don't do that thing.

We're not fucking drinking because I'm not drinking. I'm like, all right, man. And like, also, I'm going to, you know, I'm going to grab. Listen, he's yelling at me to drink. This guy usually sucks down about 12 Manhattan's every day. He's nursing one until dessert gets there. I had one. And he was weird.

He was weird. Really? Was he going on like drink? Drink? Don't put the guy. Don't, don't not drink. And then someone already died. Don't not drink because of me, but I'm going to make it all about me by telling

you to drink. I said it once. This is why you were. Twice. Three times a fatty. I really wish I had been invited. Oh, yeah. You two.

Did you guys run a show together? No. I was never a big fan of Ian. I found his comedy a little pedestrian. Well, I found you to be a bit pandantic myself. I, uh, you did, you and I did, didn't we have something with Paul Goodman? Yeah, you ran Noche together.

I didn't, not with him. No, you weren't. I wasn't, I never. He had me like MC Noce and then like me, you, Finnell did something at some like lounge show once. I don't recall that. I would black me out too. I would forget

Looking like the lion No I wish I'd have been there Did you invite me or is this a little Folism? You don't wish you, you don't wish you were there I was going to invite you Yeah I'd have fixed the vine

Oh I don't think so I'd have vibed it up Yeah Going up Byron Allen next week Hey What is Keen's I'm believing all you losers in the dust What's Keynes?

It's a steakhouse I did stay I said Keen's steakhouse And you went no I didn't. Someone said it. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, I really wish you would.

You're going to change the birthday with these vibes you got going on. Can I tell you something? Tell us. I didn't have a birthday party this year either. How old did you turn? 41. Yeah, you shouldn't. 41 last year.

40, I'll give you. Yeah. I don't want to have one this year. My buddy also threw me a birthday party to bowling alley. Yeah, that could. Is that right? Yeah, it was great. We weren't invited to that.

It was up in Providence. Oh, well, Providence. Because we were playing. Poor guys only. Because we were playing. Um. comedy connection. Then this year, I, actually this year...

Did you go and have a hot dog at the New York system? Act like you don't know the name of the place. Olony, Olney, New York system, I believe it's called. No. Great hot dog in Providence. Yeah? They also have coffee milk. I've told you about it. Coffee milk.

It's like Hershey Syrup, but it's coffee. You get that and you get a couple dogs with chili and onion and mustard. This is the most locked in. I've seen you all episode. I know. I'll tell you. I got you to she crab soup, did I dick? Dude, that was incredible.

See? How was the date? I, great. I, you bang her? Oh, buddy. No. It will happen. We, I said it was she crab soup and she said she was she crab squirt.

Classy broad. Yeah. What truck stop did you pick this lady up at, huh? Molly Pritcher. Shout out, Phil has a deep cut if you're on the NJ Turnpite, me. This guy knows his truck stops. A little bit of a lot, Lizard. Tute, shoot.

Could you put her right back on the Long Island Railroad after dinner? Woo! She put her hat back on. You got to get out of here. Smacks him on the is. All right. I'll see you later, kid. Can we kiss?

No. Yeah, no, Dave was great. It was awesome. She crab soup, amazing. But. Who pays for dinner? Come on. We split it.

Ran on the check. My heat's broken. No, we said, we got to catch a train. And we just left. No, of course I did. What do you tell? Oh, and then it was so nice, dude, we walked down to the subway, and it was right after a snowstorm,

and there were, you know, those puddles that looked like ice and you'll step in them sometimes? We were on the other side of the street, ripping Sigs, making bats on who would step in the pot or not? You and her go have some soup at a train station, go out and smoke Sigs? Yeah. My kind of gal.

This is as homeless as you get. I love you, babe. And then laugh at people stepping in puddles from across the street. It's a New York date. What do you want? You know, I'm a class, classy, classic guy. He robbed a soft pretzel guy. To a hot car vendor

Down the stairs Hey bucks or a hot dog Suck my dick He pushed his cart down the street And laughed when he chased it It was great It was really fun Well that's good

I'm glad you're finding love again Ah well I don't know Saying that You know What kind of Sigs did she smoke? Mine Marlboro Reds Oh she didn't have her own Did you light the SIG for her?

Of course You light yours Hand it to her Then you do yours That was the classiest movie It was a d' Dirt That's a bunch of hits off his Yeah

Yeah Let me just make sure it slip Hold on. Let me just even out this cherry for you. Is there poisoning it or I'm going to taste it? All right, I'll give me kills on this. Kills on this. Let's call that the episodes of people think we didn't bomb.

Well, we did. Now, the whole point of this is, it's a zip-pix. I don't know, but I'm not going to like it. It's a zip-pix. It's a nicotine toothpick that's helping me cut back on cigarettes, but they won't fucking sponsor me. That is the dirt bet, the most trashy thing ever. Try. No.

Dude, they won't sponsor me. I'm taking a wet toothpick. from you. You fucking nuts. We're not sharing it. Your figures have been in my pocket for a year and a half. Those things don't look. Seven years it looks like.

No, my stepdad used to do nicoderm. Anybody that I've ever dabbled with nicoderm? No. Get the fuck out of here. What doesn't matter? I don't like nicotine. Hey, let me go back to my original point. I didn't have a birthday party this year.

You had a shit one. Let's combine, redo, folian birthday party. Let's take you to dinner. Let's go. Let's go. He's just keen steakhouse and maybe pay my bill. Let's go. What?

Lugers. You guys. Pay me. Eat. Leave. Buggy to hang out. Let's go. Can I do the show again?

I'll show up late. You do my show. We can go bowling. I don't want to do dinner anymore. I don't want to do your show anymore. Dude, you know what would be fun if we want to do it? How many? If we went roller skating.

I will go. I'll go. I'm for sure the best. Dude, what if we went to medieval times? That would be a fun birthday. What? And filmed it for Ian's new show. Ian does fun things that other people pay for.

They don't allow productions they're owned by a huge corporation. They don't. Tend, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan, cable guy. Now,

let me tell you this. I think we really should have a joint thing. This is your Shia LaBuff interview. Hey, shit happens. Shit happens. Are you in a gang, Ian? Yes,

we'll call the Hasidics. Should have a bit. the five o'clock news that was awesome yeah oh Andrew he's the best interviewer that's great i think he's fantastic yeah it's really good god i'd love to get him on the pod and i wish he was here you see what i said you hear what i said folie don't listen to me and you're fantastic i'm not thank i'm happy for you you found love you got your you got your thing you had some soup you got your tattoo going yeah yeah you're pain right now you got all those teeth are here borrow a couple of you put his bottoms on your top

They're not renter center for I'm gonna take this off sweating But we should really have We should have a friend's dinner Yeah we should Yeah we should Hey dude Hey dude

We should Uh huh There you That changes the whole look No yeah You look crazier You look like a young Jeffrey girl Do I look like a vampire

Who's also an accountant Barrow didn't like that He looked like a comic who's bombing Oh Oh, dude, you are covered in sweat. There's no way any of that. That's all polyester you got going on. Hey, Richard Dreyfus.

I know. We're going to need a bigger mic. Holy shit, dude. There's the flux capacitor coming, pal. I have a different shirt. You are nine different people. It's crazy. You really are.

Nine different people, nine lives. I'm like a cat. Take a picture of them. I'm mad I say you up for that. He gets. Good. Man. Talk about wring around the collar.

Mm-hmm. That's like the shirt that janitors used to wear. This is my summer shirt. Will you finger-painting in that an hour ago? Take it easy, Miss Lippy. Miss Lippie. Billy Madison? I ever saw the film.

No. That's what I missed. He was 32 when it came out. I want to touch the heine. Ow! You've seen it. I know it. What?

That's the blockbuster line. How do you not... Maybe I should put it. Look at how sweaty you are. I'll put a t-shirt on. Also, a collared shirt with sweatpants and a pair of tins is a wild choice. But if you're taking the shirt off, let's see the back. There's a lot, man.

Oh, my God. Ian has a trash bag on his back. I wonder why you're sweating. You said it was all bandaged up. What the hell is that? Dude, look at that ass he's got, too. That is a wedgy. Is it?

Is it? Who had the wedge salad, huh? Extra blue cheese. Where did you get that, Keynes? Do you have your tits done? No, it's the tape under the time. Looks he's got a mastectomy. Come my back in.

You're all back. You're off camera. Get over here. You're a freak. Come back in. Ian, we're not going to air this episode unless you get back in. I'm going to be in Edmonton on the 13th. That is a wild pair of sweatpay.

You look like a cholo. I bought him at a Mexican shop. I'm pretty good. Telko. You look like you just got out of prison. Now take the hat off. I just want to see how many, like Mr. Potato Head. Now put the glasses on your head.

Watch how full is going to try to eat you. Put the glasses on your head. No, what does it matter with you? I want to see how many different ears we can get. Put the teeth in your mouth, right? What the hell do you want from me? Put your nose where your ears are. Let me put my dick where your mouth is.

That's all we need. I'm setting them up. Different. shirt design. You still got to take credit for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Friend lunch, when are you free? Never.

Okay, I tell you what, a lunch I like. Yes. I want to start shifting. I'm 50 years old, God damn. I can't be doing these dinners. Can I tell you? I do like breakfast lunch with friends, and it's so nice. You catch up.

You have some coffee. You never invited us. You're complaining. They're my neighborhood. They're my neighborhood friends. You go with fucking haystack. Fliperty. Sliperry Pete.

I'm talking to Haystack's Calhound. over here look it up it is a good reference now let me hey stacks calhoun let's see it this is this is gonna that's wrong oh my god that is whoo woo that is whew that is dead on dude viewers at home whole i mean they just saw it if they're watching them after you see haystacks calhoun go over to spotify check out ean doing odd guy doing odd jobs we're on spotify video. It's not a podcast. It's an old school TV show. It's the only TV

show on Spotify video. That's something to hang your hat on. I'm not sure of it. It's the only TV show that's not on TV. It's actually on an audio medium. Well, now that you put it that way, fuck! It's like doing a radio show by mail. What are you talking about?

Hello, my darling. You've got to wait three weeks. I know I made the joke. You got me Ian, that got you Oh Shee Hey, play boy

He's not so much of a freak After all, gang Give me in a big round of applause Baby Blues luncheonette When Great Greek luncheonette spot In my neighborhood Let's go

I'm not going out to fucking the end I'm not going out to JFK To get a Last time I had me At some fucking Vietnamese coffee shop They were looking at me Like I was fucking Colonel Kurtz

From that popular movie No, because I thought they could get a Cut for the pig. I should have went with that. They eat pork. You got me out of that one. Also, to push back, we like that place.

A lot. Yeah, it was really good. You weren't there. Me and him go a lot. What's a spot in your neighborhood? I'll go to you. Come to Manhattan. We're in New York City.

Let's go. Where are Manhattan? Where's a good lunch brunch spot in Manhattan? Midday. Go to the Smith. Sit down and have a nice jet. And a couple of cocktails. That's...

All right. I'll get my other friends to go and have a couple of cocktails. I have a cup of coffee with you guys and go party with the real guy that's what i like yeah we should really do that that would be fun i don't drink around them could mark the shark shut up i want you to drink around me yeah because you're fiended i'm not fiend this for anything what guy in a salmon shirt what he's nuts is cocaine water you are fiend for the pass with that shirt buddy holy shit i am hmm you look like the first get out get the delorean mcfly yeah take the

the fact that joke I just made. Take me back to seven seconds ago. Gippie's back, huh, you nerds? Somebody gave me a beer. I feel like the first kid out in kickball. That's good. First out, last picked.

Last picked first out. Anyway. Where's the DeLorean? Spit take for me. Please. I thought about it, but it would have just ran out of my. It would have been too.

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Look at that YG hat. Quality. We got a classic Bernie's dad hat. We got comfort colors teas. Upgraded the T's heavyweight teas for heavy white boys. We got Uncle Henry's menswear. We got Kippie's racing T-shirts. Kippie's racing T's.

We got the Bass Pro Shops. Knockoff. No big deal. How you done? We got the Palm Breakfast spot. Ooh. Look at that. And then.

And then send backs, gang. And get it for St. Patty's Day. Limited run. Kiss me. I'm trash shirt. Give it to it. Give it to a classy broad near you. That's real as you.

Are you garbers.com. Now, see, you're feeling hot too. I'm telling you. Yeah, it's hot. Fucking plate. That is a good hairline. What are you going to do with that? Huh?

What are you going to do with that? Why is it so long? With what? You growing it out for a roll or something? Yeah, butter. No, bread? Oh, fuck. No, growing out for more of a croissant.

Sesame bagel. Cream cheese. Now, do you like sesame bagels? No, I like salt bagels. I was joking. I like salt bagels. Salt bagel, French toast bagel, banger. Had it yesterday.

Before I fainted, I was asking what I ate yesterday because I couldn't remember. I kept going, what I ate today. You know what I ate today? Ian, how the fuck am I supposed to know what you ate? Then I fainted. my eyes open. Woof. Man.

Did you get some orange juice? Orange juice is good for a week. No, I was drinking Martinelli's. I was eating bananas, sugar. Dude, the whole process was a breeze. I had numbing cream. To be honest. How much would he and suck on a medical emergency around?

Well, you know, it's funny because I was telling a story about how I was not. It's more ironic. More of a. More of a, more of a clip. More of a story. No one wants to hear, but I, uh, no, when I was a carpenter, I pass out at work. and I was talking about it while getting tattooed, and then I fucking fainted again,

which is so weird. Talked it into existence. I talked it into existed. Tell yourself you're funny. Maybe I don't know. Big booty Latinas. No, I, dude, when I was a carpenter, I made a bet.

This guy bet me 20 bucks. I wouldn't eat a slug. So I bit it in half. I spit it out. Thank God. Because if I ate it, I would have went to a coma and died because I would have gotten rat long.

Happened to a kid in Australia. What's rat lung? Rat lung? Wait, say that home story again. I'm looking at it. I'm be honest with it. with you, I checked out. What happened?

When I was a carpenter, I made a bet for 20 bucks. This guy bet me I wouldn't eat a slug. So I was like, Jackass Construction Company? Hi, I'm Ian Knoxville. Hi, I'm Ian Wilmington. I'm going to frame a basement and eat a slug. I didn't go through your panty drawer. So I did used to put on homeowners underwear and come down and make my coworkers laugh.

You would. It was funny. little belt back on. Yeah. Ian, you are one sick. Barron, let me tell you, you ever hear the man, John, I'm Brian.

So I bet, this guy bet me 20 bucks. I wouldn't eat a slug. He's been telling this fucking story. If I had to hear him eat a slug one more time, I'm gonna fucking eat one myself. So you ate a slug. I didn't eat it.

I bit in and half spit it out. Uh-huh. Thank God. Thank God. Because they have so many toxins and parasites in them. It would have killed me. You could get a thing called rat lung. Rat lung.

Yeah, the remix. Rat lung. Say it fully. And what happens? Dude, this kid in Australia went into a fucking coma for like 426 days and they fucking was paralyzed and then died. I spit it out the next day exactly.

From eating every slug? He ate one slug. But that's not a rule. Fact check. Look it up. It's slugs that eat the poop of rats and the rats have to eat mollocks. So you have to be in like a...

That's like two slugs. Well, you don't know. So that's a slug that's got to eat rat shit that a rat was eating muscles? Yeah. Fully's hungry again. Now do they have those at Keens? Check the menu.

Where can we get that for lunch? Somebody's rat muscles. Extra slugs for me, please. Wait, isn't Escargo's slug? Snail. In the family. Not for me. It's all right.

I like it. It's good. Oh, dude. For Ian Doe, I was an oyster farmer. Ian does odd thing. Ian do sounds like a bad fruit. Ian do, an odd guy doing odd jobs. I was in Portland,

and I, What's the name of the show? Ian do. An odd guy doing odd jobs. Ian do. When I was little... Why don't he just called Ian doing odd stuff? Or Ian does.

When I was little and I wanted to do something... I didn't... He didn't like that. He didn't like that. In my partnership with YMH, I retained 100% creative control. So no, I will not be going back to development. Huh.

Can we buy it? How long is I'm going to buy it and shelf it like less moon viz? South of Byron Allen. I'd be on a network. Gay guy does gay shit. Coming this fall is NBC. Crackeray's motherfucker doing dumb shit. Leave back, lean back, pull it back.

Yeah, come on, fat Joe. I'm sorry. It's not just me. It's not just me. It's all you. It is all. you the table's leaning that way you are a fat man who leans a lot and we are seeing the results look at that table uh yeah um okay so i passed out 24 hours later

oh my god the story does not end well if you let me finish it ended five minutes ago did the slug make it the slug unfortunately did not make it he died he uh yeah no it was a bad idea but thank god i could have died i could have died and you wouldn't you wouldn't have been here could have died could have died What if I did die and all of this is but a dream? To give me this really shit. Hinch me. Oh, my God.

Shut up, Luke. Yeah, isn't that nice? Like we get to shark to take your job. Normally I don't like that, but I enjoyed Luke catching that. These Jewish guys got mocked you. You're hired. Come on. I'm Ian.

Ian, one of the things we've talked about recently and we've been talking to guests and you know, you're, you know, wacky guy. Cooky guy. What is one of the things that you might do? It doesn't have to be expensive or anything, but that makes you feel classy and, like, rich. And you're like, oh, when I do, like, it could be valet in your car.

It could be like you have a nice robe. Or when I go to the store, I buy multiple things of paper towel just to have. Eating she crab soup? Yeah. Smoking a cigarette in bed. Wow. Makes you feel rich? It makes me feel alive like a real adult.

Or putting a little bow tie on my. cat and sharing a meal. I got to give them both of them. I got to push back, I think, on both of them. The laying in bed, having a cigarette. With an ashtray on your chest, you got some tunes on, the windows open. The rich guys aren't doing that. Yeah, well, I'm a different type of rich where I'm not.

I'm getting there. Now listen to my TV show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. See me on the road to infidance.com. I'm going everywhere. I'm booked up until 2027.

Don't underestimate me. 2027. Yeah. I'm feeling good. Who's underestimating you? He panicked them. A couple guys. But they'll pay.

People are big. I'm really great, but I'm moving on the conversation for some reason. Where you're booked until 2027? I feel you don't have the respect of my peers for some reason. I have the respect, but nobody seems to voice it. You're booked all through 2027. Yeah. That's great.

Yeah. You got a good agent. Yeah. Shut up. CAA, Matt Schultz. You're the fucking man, bro. Yeah. Yeah, no, dude, the road's been

fucking great. I've been loving it. I've been selling better and better and better and I'm really, really enjoying it. Every set I do is different. It's very, like,

improv-heavy. Some of it's not even funny. A lot of it's spoken word. Did we ask him about this? That's always the mark of a guy spiraling. Oh, yeah. I know.

It's going great. You're having the, you're answering questions. No one is. Yeah, we're moving more and more tickets. I saw more t-shirts, more more people are coming out. That's a great question.

CAA says, thrilled or stoked. We've been working on manifesting. You're not even with CAA. I'm just spelling letters. You don't know, Matt Schultz? No, no, no. No, my agents at Alameno are really good.

L. M. M. I'm just making stuff up now. Improv heavy. Ian Finance.com. No two sets are the same. I'm improv. He's heavy. That's funny.

You got to see. see this guy. You gotta see him. Come on. Yeah. The three of us should tour. That would be fucking incredible. It'd be like gangbusters, dude.

If we did a fucking bus tour and fucking film did and then I... You mean the special we already released? We didn't release. No, dude. If we... And what if we did an episode of Ian do? What? That would be...

You know, I'm doing an episode... Are you still in production now? Yeah, I film all the time. We got so many episodes banked. I film all the time. I got the guy. My job today is podcaster. No, I'm doing an episode of Subway Takes, and I'm doing Subway Take my job, and I'm going to interview

Kareem and then interview a couple other people. Yeah. It's, dude, I'm having so much fun with it. You're stealing a guy's show. Yeah, a little bit, you know? Man, that guy just got financed. Yeah. Woo!

You got finance. You just got finance. You show up and just takes a large job. Two guys from customers there. Let me tell you right now. Do you know how it would go down like gangbusters? A bus tour, me following in an RV. I'm okay with that

I just liked the sound of that better Dude what if we did that We did like activities and camping That would be fun Why don't we go skiing Do you guys like skiing I think the activities are of a sexual age Killington

Stowe up in Vermont I don't like those places My cousins went there when I was a kid We never went I grew up I grew up snowboard him but I'm a ski guy I took myself on a one man

solo ski trip shout out keystone in denver amazing i ran it a ski and ski out air bambi incredible fucking so much fun up on the mountain i got oh god i would love it i kind of want to get a new cat make him a travel cat but then my other cats would be upset that i bring him around and they'd be jealous yeah i wonder how that's going to go over on the board meeting you'd be voted all this fucking head of crazy That'd be a power struggle within the condominium. You're not a pet guy? I have a dog.

Yeah. I just don't dream about taking him skiing with it. All those say rare? He's a wacky guy. Yeah. I'm an odd guy doing on jobs. That's what it is. All right, let's get started.

What do you say? Get started. What have we not been recording? Jesus Christ. You guys are you? The white coats come and take you away. They got that net, the dog net. Oh, my job today's head to hospital.

I'm going to act like what it is to be on the end page in rehab. Yes, it is. Now, where can they find the show? YouTube.com slash Ian Finance Comedy. It's on my YouTube page, YMH's YouTube page, Spotify video. The only video on Spotify. Yeah, the only TV show on Spotify. How many, how many Ian do the math to come?

Comes up. Ian do Ian Fidance. There you go. Ian Dushow. Yeah. That's a black guy. There you go right here. Oh, yeah. Terry Blacks. Terry Blacks. Okay. Did you go to Terry Blacks? Yeah, I was a pit boss of Terry Blacks.

No shit. A pit boss? Yeah. So I learned how to smoke the meats. And then I went and I got adopted by an Australian family. And then I did, I was head of security of the comedy mothership. Whoa. Yeah. So I wore head to toe tactical gear.

and I had like a whip in an American flag with a spear on it to protect free speech. You know, it was like a joke because everyone thinks that they're all like Marines there. It was great. It was so fun. I did a thing where I acted like I was lost in the mothership like Blair Witch style, you know. It was very fun. Very nice. Don't lie to me.

I'm serious. I'm trying to plug your show here. Thanks. Odd guy doing odd jobs. Episode three, Big Guns Tattoos. Yeah, I got my tattoo license in Wisconsin. You got a license to do that? 65 bucks in an hour, boom, licensed tattoo artist.

I tattooed that S symbol, the Stozy symbol, you know, on the sky's leg. Turned up pretty good. I'm, uh, say so myself. Oh, that's good. But yeah, yeah, I oyster farmed in Maine, John's River oysters. It was amazing. Just pop them out of the water, shuck them, eat them. Incredible.

Okay. Amazing. Okay. Yeah. That's good. You want to sell it more? No, no, no. It's good.

Check it out, gang. Yeah. Maybe if I say a couple words, I was people watch. You did battle. You did battle box. Yeah, they opened up the arena to me. Canine training. Got tackled by German Shepherds.

Sauce pizza. Saucy Sicilian. Shout out. They watched this show. That's how I got hooked up with it. They contacted me. Shout out to them. Saucy Sicilian out in Oklahoma City.

Saucy, they used Sicilian pizzas? Yeah. Really good. Really good. I was a 50-year-old guy. I like Sicilian now. I like do Sicilian pizza. 50, 50 years.

That diet decaf diet root bear. Cillian. Playing cheese. Are you telling us or are you telling yourself? I'm not telling myself anything. No, he does diet, rupee, Sicilian, and... What is better about Sicilian? Eighth graders shirts.

Oh, okay. All right, so your tastes are changing. It's more of an older, elder statesman slice. You know what I love now? I love Gooden Plenny's. One of those? Huge Good and Plenty guy. Is that name of a black comic in Philly?

Gills. It's licorice. You never had Gooden plenny's? No. Really? You're an old soul. Surprise. Yeah.

A little Good and Plenty. It's black liquors with a little candy coating. Candy-cating. I try to stay away from candy. Do you? Yeah. I had some to keep my blood sugar up during the tattoo, but... You got a tattoo?

We got to wrap it up, gang. What a great chorus. Gang, check out Ian's brand new show. Ian do. I got a show. Odd guy doing odd stuff. No, Ian doing odd guy doing odd jobs, you fucking idiot. Why are you just called an odd guy doing...

Ian finance an odd guy. What's a guy? Ian Duh. When I was little, I had a speech impediment and I couldn't talk. And when I wanted to do something, I would just go, Ian Doo. And there's a video of me staring to my dad going, Ian Doo, and he sawing a two by four. And I just annoyed him enough to where he gave me a saw at three years old. So I would just say that to annoy my parents into letting me do stuff. So everything I do, I kind of do like a little. That's how you texted us, Ian Doo, podcast.

So everything I do, I try to give a little nod to like, my family somehow. Well, I'm teasing you. We love you very much. I love you, man. Thank you for coming on a show. Thank you, and I was teasing you about the gift.

Thank you for everything. Your, yes. My gift is genuinely very nice. Love. Thank you. Are you thanking them for my gift? I said it was beautiful. So I'm going to use it to sleep on tonight.

What? I love you guys. I love you, I love you. I'm so happy for you guys. I think. And genuinely, it makes me smile. Shut up.

Think of our memory. All right. And we should do a brunch or something. Yes. And not just say it. Let's do it. Let's Ian do it. Let's Ian do it.

What are you doing tomorrow? Ian do not pay the check. Ian, I'll buy. I'm not splitting appetizing. Yeah, right? Me and me and Fully sharing She crab soup. What the fuck at?

No, just bread. Getting herpes. Dude, we should go eat at the seafood place in Grand Central. Get some she crab oysters. Let's do it up. Midday. Nah. Gippie, what do you got for him?

I'll be at the seafood place. at the train station. We're going right after this. Yeah, gang, we're on the road right now. Shows are selling out. That's great. That sounded pandering. No.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding, obviously. Me too. I heard you book till 2027. Oh, Byron. I'm doing Pittsburgh Improv New Year's Eve. First and the second. Let's go.

Okay. That's a lot of tickets. That's a big room. You know, I sell that room out? What? I didn't hear you. I sell that room out. Good for you.

Feels really good. Yeah. Okay. I was really trying to prove something to me. I drink diet root beer. And things are going great. And everything's fantastic. Only Sicilian.

Again, get your tickets. And merch. We did limited quantities. Get a while last. We love you. Love you. See you next week. Peach.

Bye.