Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard - Armchair Anonymous: Unexpected Orgasm II

Episode Date: November 14, 2025

Dax and Monica talk to Armcherries! In today's episode, Armcherries tell us about an unexpected orgasm.Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch new content on YouTube or listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free by joining Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify. Start your free trial by visiting wondery.com/links/armchair-expert-with-dax-shepard/ now.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

welcome. That should have been for Halloween. I never did. Okay, you can do it now. Okay. Welcome, welcome, welcome, boom to our Jargonautomans. Today, back by our popular demand. Yeah. Unexpected orgasm number two. It's good. These are great. It's good. And I'm always, I will say I'm always a little apprehensive. You're really nervous people are going to fib. Yeah, I am. I'm nervous about fibbers and my radar's on, but I don't believe any of these to be fibs. No. And in fact, one I'll add, we're having fun, fun, fun, fun, fun. Three people are spraying all over the place. That's fun. And then another person, there's spray, spray, and then, oh, it's not very fun. It's not fun. It took a turn. It took a turn. Please enjoy

unexpected. And literally, I hope everyone gets to enjoy an unexpected orgasm. Tis the season to save money. And the best way to save is signing up for Racketon. With Racketon, you can make your list and save on it twice. Shop for holiday deals at your favorite stores like Adidas, Best Buy and Sephora, and then get cash back on top of the sale price. That's Savings on savings. You can check off everyone on your list, including yourself. Join for free today. Just go to rackaton.ca, download the app, or install the browser extension. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N. We are supported by Peloton. You know how life gets especially chaotic this time of year? Work, kids, trying to remember what day it is. For me, finding time to move can feel impossible,

but that's where Peloton comes in. Peloton has completely reimagined cross-training with the new Peloton Cross-Train Plus, powered by Peloton IQ. It's Peloton's most elevated equipment yet, real-time guidance, endless ways to move, and it helps you get more done in less time. I like the time crunch aspect of it because sometimes I only got 20 minutes to squeeze something in. This is perfect. With Peloton IQ, you get personalized plans, form correction, and weight suggestions that help you train smarter and stay consistent no matter how busy life gets. Let yourself run, lift, sculpt, push, and go. Explore the new Peloton cross-training Tread Plus at one peloton.ca.

All times come and go good times take them slow my life I had them both I've never one thing you gotta know

I'm gonna keep on shining Hi Hello What a warm, comfy inviting sweater you're in Is it fall weather where you're at? It is. Nice and cozy.

I'm not mad about it. Where are you? I am in British Columbia, friendly neighbor of the north. Do you have a fake name that you've already picked out? I would love for you two to come up with one for me. Dreamed of this happening. Betsy. Okay.

Yeah. Betsy's a very fun name for an unexpected orgasm. Like, oh, you know Betsy, right? You know Betsy. She's unpredictable. I can't believe I'm about to say this. story. Oh, I'm so proud of you. Yes. I applaud this. Literally, I just told my husband this story when I submitted it. So this is the second time I'm now saying this out loud. He had never heard it.

No. This was buried deep in the archives. And really quick, without giving any of the story away, what was his reaction? I'm assuming he loved it. He loved it. Yeah. These are good stories for husbands. They want that. And it should be across the board because an orgasm is a gift. Nature gave us a couple gifts. And this is one of them. I would agree. And if one smacks you out of nowhere, how exciting. Okay. Okay, let's hear it. Okay, I'll get right into it.

So set the scene here. This story took place about 15 years ago. I was a senior in high school at the time. My family, very adventurous travelers, and we were going on kind of one of our last big family trips before I went off to university the next year. And we were going to India for a whole month. A month. They are adventurous. Yeah.

My parents and younger brother had left a week before me. I had to stay behind to finish. exams, which I wasn't mad about because being typical 17-year-old home by myself for a week, I decided this is the time. I'm going to throw a massive house party. This is a night. I was going to lose my virginity to this boy that I had been seeing. Oh, wow, so much on the table. I'm approving of the second game plan. The first one, the house party. This is my big nightmare. Really? Yeah, I've got two kids, and I've got a pretty good place to host a party, and I travel. It's coming. Brisky business.

Oh, God. So anyways, as you can imagine, night did not go according to plan. I got way too drunk to have sex, ended up passing out. Oh, man. Did get some action, so I was happy about that, but no, not the full shabing. So sadly, woke up very much still a virgin and with a very trashed house. Okay, so all that to say, I was very horny teenager. Sex is all I could think about at this point in time.

So the thought of spending three weeks in India sharing hotel rooms with my family meant no chance of funny business. And this was honestly devastating. I was pretty active in the self-intertainment department. Right. And if you don't mind my asking, we're talking daily. I just want to comp it to my activity as a teenager. Probably daily at this point in time. Good for you.

Yeah, that's great. Miss those days. Fast forward to the end of the trip. We're in India. A trip is going great, having a fun time. But at this point, I'm feeling pretty pent up. My sex drive, all-time high. I've been messaging this boy back at home.

I'm reading The Time Traveler's wife, which turns out was a very steamy novel. Isn't it like really sad? You can, like, hardly be contained, Betsy. I love this. You're about to explode on the family vacation. I feel like that book is extremely sad. Is it? And sexy?

I don't remember the sexy part. Maybe her kink is like being really depressed. Oh, I understand. I don't know. I feel like. need to revisit this book because I also remember being very sad now as an adult, but I remember this book was getting me going. Anything would get you going, it sounds like. You're just primed. I'm really just counting down the days till I'm home and can have some privacy. So we're in the

Jaipur region and we're so excited to go on this tiger safari. So we pile into this big open truck bed, kind of like a smaller semi-truck and there's like two benches where people are just sitting facing each other. And we're just in the open. So there's probably about 20 of us sitting on these benches facing each other can i interrupt you betsy are you monica doing what i'm doing i'm like okay is it going to be an elephant orgasm this will be new like riding the elephant grind and then i'm like oh rickety truck through the jungle bounce bounce bounce i'm like trying to figure out what's a red hair i have an idea we don't want to spoil anything yeah we don't i just want to know if you were trying to ratchet through options i have a thought like oh someone brought a broomstick

oh okay there's a broomstick oh okay we're on this truck we are the only white people on this truck surrounded by kind of a bunch of local families and young children. And I will say the whole time we were in India, everyone thought I was a Bollywood star. I don't know why. I had very dark long hair at this time. I was getting pictures taken of me nonstop. Oh, wow. All eyes were on me kind of at all times.

So the families are looking at us, kind of giggling, waving, taking some pictures. So I'm sitting between my dad and brother. My mom's off to the side of us. And we take off through this jungle. literally on the bumpiest dirt road, possible. We are flying 50 miles per hour for sure. Like there's no way we were ever going to spot an actual tiger is peer chaos. Oh, man.

He was just getting through it. He made me a prior engagement. Maybe he had a Tonka. Maybe he'll call for unexpected leave back. Sometimes there's overlapped on unexpected stuff happening. We're thinking, okay, this will eventually slow down like once we get to the tiger spotting area, but about 30 minutes into flying down the road, we realized. Okay, this is probably what the whole.

excursion's going to be like. So we're laughing to ourselves, realizing we definitely booked the budget version of this tour and are probably not going to see any tigers. The guys are just chit-chatting away, not even looking into the juggles. Indians love to talk. So before we left, I had chugged a few tri-tees because I was and am obsessed with them. Rookie mistake didn't go pee before we got on this truck. It's about this time that I realized I have to pee so insanely bad. My eyes are watering. Like there's tears streaming down my face and I've been clenching for the past 20 minutes. This truck is not slowing down. Like, we're just flying, bumping like crazy. And the guides really don't speak much English. I'm super

shy. Like, there's not a chance in hell I'm waving them down to be like, hey, can you stop the truck? Just let me get off. I'll just go pee on the side of the road. But I did know that we were eventually going to stop for a bathroom and snack break at the halfway point. So I'm just squeezing for dear life until then. And so we're continuing on, no stopping in sight, still flying. Every bump is really unbearable, and I'm starting to feel that familiar tension building in the downstairs region. Wow. Oh, my gosh. So you recognize that it's like, wow, this is transferred into a mix of pain and a bit of pleasure. Yes. Combination of the bumps, full bladder, three weeks of not being able to release, apparently reading the time traveler's wife, just being a very horny teenager.

The thought of tigers, maybe, too. That's what I thought. I'm realizing what is about to happen, and I feel like I have no control over the situation. Yeah, wow. What? And so I don't know about you, Monica, but when I have a full bladder, I can have, like, insanely intense orgasms and very quickly. Monica's never had a full bladder. That is true. I don't drink enough water to have a full bladder.

Hack, I sometimes don't always pee before sex. I have heard this. This was where this whole tip started, but suddenly it hits. It's honestly, I think, the strongest orgasm I've had. in my entire life. Oh. Oh. Like to the point where you need to get vocal?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm not one to orgasm subtly. I'm usually like very, very flushed. I have a hard time being quiet. So at this point, I'm just trying not to make eye contact with the families across from me who are staring at me, trying not to touch my brother or dad who are sitting very close to them.

This goes on for at least 30 seconds. Wow. It's the orgasm of your life. It literally was. I'm still trying to reach that kind of high again. Sure. Do you think part of it is because it was bad? I think so.

The tension was just so high. I'm bright red. Like I can tell, my face is on fire. I'm shaking like I'm vibrating. I'm definitely being audible. I'm gasping. I'm really trying. I'm just looking down.

Are you moving your body? Riving? I was more like shaking. So my dad turns. Oh, no. And he's. literally like, horrifying. Are you okay? Like what's happening? It's obvious. I'm having some kind of medical incident. Like everyone is staring at this point. Oh my goodness. And so I see

my parents look at each other out of the corner of their eye. And I swear they're thinking like, did that just happen? Because I'm not responding. I'm just sitting there. I'm looking down. I'm trying to gather myself. Sure. You need a cigarette. I'm just sitting there trying to process the fact that I, I just had a 10 out of 10 orgasm next to my dad and brother and mom involved 15 other people watched me. So I'm praying a tiger jumps out of the jungle at this point to take eyes off me. Like, this is horrendous.

Did you still have to pee after that? Yes. So I was going to say the story doesn't quite stop there. I'm sitting in my post-orgasm shame for probably another 15 minutes or so. And we finally get to the midway point of this tour. I'm clenching for dear life. so excited because I know there's going to be a bathroom here. So we pull up still just in the middle of the jungle and there's this clearing with this little cement structure. So I'm like,

okay, thank God there's the bathrooms. I try to like subtly make my way over there. I'm speedwalking. Get to the bathrooms. It's just three cement walls with open back just facing to the jungle and I go in and it's just a little drain in the middle. And there's no roof so you can kind of hear everything going on. So I make it to the bathroom first as I was speedwalking over there. So by the time I'm in there, the entire truck is now lined up to use this washroom because people probably similarly to me were dying on this bumpy truck. And so it turns out I had been clenching so hard that I literally could not relax my pelvic floor. Like it was stuck. And you're squatting. It's not like you can relax your muscle. Yeah. And the back is

open to tigers. Yeah. Nothing about this is a calm situation. I hear the people out there. I've been in there for way too long already, probably going on five minutes. I hear my mom, she's like, are you okay in there, honey? As if that's ever helped with anything. Absolutely not. And I know that if I push any harder, it could be possibly a honest situation. Oh, boy, okay. Sure, all those chai teas. Yeah, I gave up and I had to get back on the truck for an hour drive back. What? It was excruciating. This was the worst hour of my entire life. I get back to the host. hotel pee for what felt like five minutes did have a bit of a tonka situation. So thank God didn't push any harder. Sure, sure, sure. Wow, I'm glad you made a man. You had so much happening

in your lower GI. Yeah. Maybe your mom and brother and dad thought you shit yourself. Right. That could have been it. And then luckily you were in the can forever. Exactly. Oh, yeah, she that reinforces that it was that. I'm going to lock that away in my mind that that's what they think and we'll go with that. Yeah. I guess I can only say as a parent, like my thought of my parents seeing me orgasm is absolutely a nightmare. Now, conversely, your kids are just these dumb things. Everything's whatever. You clean their poop. I promise even if they did think it, they're not like, oh, she's a pervert. You're just like, oh, this, this is new. Kind of like the time she poop up her back of her clothes and her diaper. Definitely worse for my perspective. What I think could

have more likely happened is that you could have developed in that moment a very interesting kink because your greatest orgasm was in public being stared at and being shamed. Like, I could imagine this turning into some weird kink. I could too. Did it? No, I am still so mortified being that this is the second time I'm speaking this out loud. I thought it was going to be that a tiger appeared. Oh, and you sprayed.

Yeah. Yeah. You just got so excited and into it. It was so majestic. and tigers are hot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And feisty and scary. Well, they're solitary.

They're unavailable because they're solitary. Yeah, that's right. You know they'll never really link up with you. Happy ending to the story, the boy I was trying to get with before the trip, did lose my virginity to him and he's now my husband. Oh, my God, you're married to the guy. Wow. I also just want to say, thank you both. You've changed mine of my husband's life by introducing us to Emily Burger.

It's now an obsession. We might be the only two people who talk about it more than you guys. Oh, wonderful. Where did you get at New York? Yes, planning a weekend trip back there just so we can go eat there. I'm also gluten-free because of autoimmune, but it was the one time I've cheated in eight years, and it was so worth it. I agree. That's the place I'll do it.

That pretzel bun? Oh. Well, Easter egg, we are going to have Emily on. So maybe we'll get to find out how she stumbled upon that recipe. So nice meeting you. That's a great story. Just loved it. Great meeting, you guys.

Monica, congrats on Beth's dead. Just binge the first two episodes this morning. Unhooked. Oh, good. Thank you so much. It gets way more twisted. All right. Well, take care.

Have a great rest of your day. Bye. Wow. Oh, what a great story. Next to your dad. Yeah, no, that part is rough. That part is rough. Yeah.

You know you got to spray when you can do it. Right. Exactly. That's how intense it was. What I know from that story is I've never had an orgasm that good. Really? Yeah, I just can tell. Why?

Well, first of all, 30 seconds? My God. Rob, how long do yours last? 95 seconds. Oh, 95 seconds. On average. We are supported by Cozy. Let me tell you about the time I tried to move my old sectional up three flights of stairs.

Two broken picture frames. one scuffed wall, and several questionable words later, I learned that furniture should not require an engineering degree to get into your home. That's exactly why I love cozy. They've basically solved every furniture headache you can think of. Their pieces arrive in manageable boxes that actually fit through your door. Wild concept, right? And assembly is so simple, you won't need to call that one friend who's weirdly good at building things.

But here's what really gets me excited. Everything is designed for real life. Spilled coffee on your couch? The covers are washable. Want to redecorate? Their design consultants help you figure out the perfect setup. Need a different configuration? The modular design lets you switch things up whenever you want.

I mean, finally, furniture that understands we're human beings who occasionally make messes. Change our minds and yes, sometimes have to move up three flights of stairs. Transform your living space today with Cozy. Visit cozy.ca. That's C-O-Z-E-Y.C-A. The home of possibilities made easy. You're back.

your walls and your sanity will thank you. Mom and Dad. Mom and Mom. Dad and Dad. Whatever. Parents. Are you about to spend five hours in the car with your beloved kids this holiday season? Driving old Granny's house? I'm setting the scene. I'm picturing screaming, fighting. Back-to-back hours of the K-pop Demon Hunter's soundtrack on repeat. Well, when your ears start to bleed, I have the perfect thing to keep you from rolling out of that moving vehicle. Something for the whole family. He's filled with laughs. He's filled with rage. The OG Green Grump, give it up for me, James Austin Johnson, as The Grinch.

And like any insufferable influencer these days, I'm bringing my crew of lesser talented friends along for the ride with A-list guests like Gromk, Mark Hamill, and the Jonas Brothers, whoever they are. There's a little bit of something for everyone. Listen to Tis the Grinch holiday podcast wherever you get your podcasts. Hello. Hello, Dylan. How are you? Wonderful. Do you work in customer service? Are you a gamer? Why do you have this great headset? I do not, but I just got this from a new laptop box. So thanks for calling that out. Oh, wow. I just came as a free accessory. Yes. And Dylan, where are you? I'm in Yellowknife, Northwest Territories, Canada. Another Canadian. We just had a Canadian. You Canadians like to come on accident. I guess we do. I'm wondering if I could possibly be the most northern collar to armchair anonymous.

How high up are you? Are you on the same latitude as parts of Alaska? Yeah. So not quite in the Arctic Circle, but close. Oh, my goodness. And what are you doing up there? I'm a land surveyor. Okay.

You've got the tripod and you're out there dialing that thing in. That's me. Were you like an outdoorsy kid? Were you a Boy Scouty type kid? How did you get drawn to that? Yeah, always outdoors. That's what kind of drew me to the profession. And do you have a lot of bear encounters?

A couple polar bear stories. That's cool. So you have an unexpected orgasm story. Yeah. And this is a bit of a tofer. Kind of blends in the story with some lovely prompts that you love on, I'm sure anonymous. Oh, boy. Wonderful.

This is great, great, great. Okay, so I'll set the scene. So this was, I guess, 10 years ago now. My girlfriend at the time and her mother had just moved towns. And they just got in the keys to their new house. So we had decided we were going to do renovations. We were going to be painting all day. There are some tradesmen there doing some work on the house.

So we get there. Everything's going well. And I get the urge that I need to shit my pants. I need to use the bathroom now. So I'm weighing out my options. I am seeing that the plumber is now working on the toilet and is replacing that. So the toilet is on the back deck. Oh, okay.

This being a new town, it's a Sunday morning, not really sure what's open. Also, how rural is this? Do they have neighbors? Could you shit in the woods? Great question. So I'm from a very rural area, but they just moved into like in town limits. Shitting's frowned upon in the yard. Yeah.

And new neighbors. So it's a corner lot, so streets on two sides and then backed on neighbors on the other. And I'm realizing that this is a very urgent situation. A little bit of backstory. Pooping issues on my life. We've go days and days and days without pooping. And then your body's like, this is happening now. Yeah.

Sounds like IBS. Or an opium. addiction either or hopefully the first so I step out on the deck I see that there's no real good spots in this new backyard to hide I see the toilet on the deck I'm like well maybe I could just maybe I could just do that oh my God that feels crazy but better than pooping right on the deck but then what they're going to bring it in with he's going to then take it into the grass and take a hose and spray it all out somehow without anyone knowing oh I mean who knows been super logical you know You're not thinking straight at that time.

So as I'm weighing out these options, I am also noticing that our elderly new neighbors are in their windows just peeking at us and super excited to come and say hi. Oh, boy. The only thing that I know is open being the Sunday morning. There's a gas station about five minutes away. I make the decision that I'm going to drive to this place or at least find somewhere where I can go do my business.

As I'm running to my car, the elderly couple step outside. And how's it going? You know, trying to introduce yourself. I'm sorry, got to go. But yeah. Oh, okay. Good. You have to protect yourself.

Not the time. So I'm in the car. I'm driving, you know, radio silent and I'm realizing this is bad. I'm not sure if I'm going to make it. I'm looking around seeing if I can just pull over anywhere. And I'm not seeing much so I just decide I'm just going to gun it to the gas station. I am clenching with everything I can. Shoulders are backed up against the seat, left foot against the floorboards, and I'm now lifted up off the seat of the car.

It's dire situation. And then all of a sudden, my legs start to tremble and I let out this guttural moan. My legs give out and I explode in my pants with semen. Wait, what? With semen. I absolutely came and I was so confused. Oh, my God. He blew it.

What? Moni. This is so confusing. He was squeezing so tight and then somehow. Wow. Okay. Did you have the waves and things? sensations of pleasure? It was an insane orgasm. Good or bad? Good. Oh, it was wild. Okay, this is not

that dissimilar from the last story. She had too much yon. She had to pee her pants. The pressure that's happening below. Yeah, below deck. Boy, did it build. Not only that, but I realize I think I've definitely shit my pants. Okay. At the same time, sure. Lots going on down there. However, I'm still like super clenching and realizing like this is not done. So gas station in sight, I'm in total shock. I'm like, what just happened to my body? Wait, I'm sorry. I have a question really quick. So when do you think you got hard? That's such a great question. I'm so glad to you asked. Thank you. Not hard or aroused in the slightest bit. I was completely shocked. An erection free flaccid orgas. Yeah. Okay. Wow. Wow. That's cool. Should be studied.

That's an anomaly. Yeah. So I can. Continue driving, still realizing that this is not over. I realize I have to go to the attendant, like at the front of the gas station, as for the key, I'm like pulling down my sweater in the front of my jeans. I'm like crouching over, probably looked more obvious. Realizing now is a 16-year-old boy. Oh, man. I'm like, how do you have to key? I'm hastily running into the bathroom because it's still a dire situation.

And I don't even shut the stall door when I absolutely destroy their bathroom. and pull down the pants and realized that, yep, full of come and a fair bit of shit in there as well. Oh, my God. What a visual. So I did the only thing possible, which was to lie and tell my girlfriend that I wasn't feeling well. I threw my underwear out and I drove home in silence for 45 minutes

questioning what just happened. Yeah. Yeah, because you're 16, you're really liable to be afraid of any, like, uh-oh, you're always waiting to find out there's something defective about you. Oh, my God. I'm a weirdo. I just will betray us. any moment.

Or reward us. No, because you don't, shooting in your car isn't fun. No, but the sprain. I know, but it's like, how did my body just do that without my permission? Yeah, now we're getting into some real familiar territory for you, PTSD. Oh, Dylan, what a lovely. Yeah, double whammy. Thanks for sharing.

Thank you so much. This is so cool that I'm getting the chance to talk to you guys. This is incredible. My sister loves Armchair Anonymous. We talk about them every week. And I didn't tell her I'm doing this. Shout out. See when she pieces it together.

Well, it's great meeting you, brother. I'm delighted there's someone at the top of the world listening to the show. It's kind of exciting. Be careful with the polar bears. We'll do. Take care. Bye bye. Hello.

Can you hear me? Beautifully. Is it Kylie? It is. Where are you at, Kylie? I'm in San Marcos, Texas, right outside of Austin. Pretty sure that's where Monica almost drowned. Yes, we tube there.

Oh, shit. That's where it was. Are you from there? I've lived here for about 15 years. And do you love it? Do you recommend it? 10 out of 10, recommend San Marcos Rivers, best river in the world. Yeah.

I've tubed it like four or five times, I think. It's so delightful. And it's warm. Yeah, it's 72 degrees in the water every day of the year. And then Texas is just hot all the time. Oh, beautiful. So already, you know, you are a very kind-looking, sweet-looking person. I would even say just at first glance, maybe even shy.

So this is really incredible that you're willing to share this story with us. It's very admirable. Thanks, y'all. I appreciate you giving me the opportunity. Are you shy? Yeah, and I get that wrong? I wouldn't say I'm normally shy. I think talking about this is a little out of my comfort zone.

A couple people really strongly recommend. I don't use my real first name, but I'm going for it. Oh, good job. Okay, well, you've heard our previous one, right? Aren't they so life affirming? Like, they just make you happy these stories, generally. Totally. I went back and re-listened to them and it gave me some confidence. Okay, great. Set the scene for us.

Okay, so I grew up in Des Moines, Iowa, and I was a horse girl through and through. Gloved riding horses started when I was a little girl taking lessons at the barn. I'd worked out a deal with the barn where I could feed and muck stalls on the weekends to help pay for my lessons. My dad was a school teacher. My mom was a nurse. So we didn't have tons. of extra income to support this very expensive habit, but they were able to scrape it together to get me this discount right off the track, Thoroughbred. And I was really excited. Oh, wow. My friends had these fancy imported warm bloods, but I was happy with my guy. And aren't those racehorses? They're real twitchy and kind of erratic, no? It takes a lot to ride one of those successfully. Big time.

And this one hadn't been trained very well. All he knew how to do was go really fast. So in the winters, it's really snowy in Iowa, so we're not able to ride outside. So we get switched to the indoor arena. And one of the things our trainers do during our lessons is take our saddles away from us sometimes just to help work on building stability, balance, create good core engagement. In the winters, we would just kind of get in that routine of not riding with saddles. So one winter day, I go to the barn. It wasn't for a lesson.

It was just a normal training. ride. And I wanted to be a good student. So I was like, you know what? We'll forego the saddle. I've got this. When you're writing, there's a few different gates. There's the really gentle walk, pretty self-explanatory. Then you go into a trot, which is a lot bouncier. Not super comfortable when you have a saddle. Definitely not comfortable when you don't have a saddle. And then there's the canter, which is this really nice kind of loping gate. My horse, the retired racehorse that he was, He was always wanting to go as fast as he could during this. So it was this like push, pull kind of dynamic between the two of us.

But we get into the canter. It's going great. He's pulling a little bit. I start to notice these kind of spasms in my abdominals. I don't think too much of it. Bring him back to a walk. Take a little bit of a breather. Then we get back into it.

We're cantering. He's trying to go fast. Bring him back. We get into this good flow. And these spasms are getting a little bit more intense, a little bit more sensational. Oh. And they start going a little further south.

Like what you guys would call PQs. Yeah. I'm experiencing the PQs. Can I ask quickly your backstory at this age? You'd had orgasms already or no? No. Okay. I think that's an important detail.

Yeah. It's like what's happening. So you're not very familiar with all the stuff that's happening. No, I was not sure what was going on. I liked it. Yeah. Yeah. I wasn't sure what was about to happen.

And so as I'm feeling these sensations, I'm starting to squeeze him tighter, which indicates to him to go faster. Oh, wow. So he's going faster, and I'm feeling more sensation and more sensation. Oh, my God. What will give? And then I just remember the world starts to get spotty and then dark, and I can feel my eyes rolling into the back of my head. And my mouth is open, and I'm for sure making a noise. Wait, are you by yourself?

Yeah, how visible are you to the coach? This wasn't a lesson, thankfully. But my friend was there, and I bring my horse back to a walk. I feel this intense sensation of wetness. Oh, wow. And he's just looking at me, like, you good? I think I just had an orgasm. Okay, good.

So did you know? Yeah. Was it obvious to you once it happened? Like, oh, that was an orgasm. For sure. I was like, that's what it had to have been. But I think there were two things at work. I think the stimulation of not having the saddle, but also having the core engagement,

the squeezing of the abdominal muscles, I think that at 15, I was really. shown like what a double orgasm. What? Wow. That is so exciting. And do you think your friend had any idea or they missed it? I was like making noises. She for sure knew something was a...

Now this has got to be an incredibly common occurrence, right? I've heard from many women who ride horses that they've had orgasms on the horse. Is it kind of like standard? Have you seen anyone else have one? I haven't talked to anybody else that has. I don't know if we're all super loud and proud about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do think the bareback factor, though, really added more to this.

Now, so if I'm you and I'm 15 and I have that experience, I'm like, when are we riding again? Yeah. Did you want that to happen again and again? I knew the addict and you would ask that. You knew. So so often growing up, the middle school and high school guys would be like, do you fuck your horse? Oh, uh-huh. I think that I didn't want to be like too much of a horse girl.

So you're a little nervous to actually commit to that. Well, you don't want that to be your identity. I think it's a girl that fucks horses. But there's a big difference between riding a horse and having an accident or as a kind of a small difference. You think it's a small dog. I think it's a pretty material difference. That's so exciting.

Did it ever happen again? It didn't happen again. It was a one in done. I'm glad it happened. But I'm also happy that it was just once. Did you feel a little like next time you saw the horse, you felt like you didn't want to like look at him. Shy. Yeah, shy.

I gave him extra treats that night. I was like, good boys. Okay, great. Were you like, God, we're really sympathico. We work really well together. You're kind of asking if she fell in love with the horse afterwards. He set the standard for me. I'll say that.

Like, level up, gentlemen. Yeah, that's right. Did he bite people that are really high strung those race horses? No, or is that a stereotype? He didn't bite people, but there was definitely a time the barn was getting fed while I was taking him out for a lesson. And he was pointed at the barn. And as I was getting on him, he just ran through the fence, splintered the fence and went right back into his stall to eat his dinner. Oh, boy.

Yeah. So explosive. That's what you want in a racehorse. Oh, well, Wiley. Well, Kylie, that's a very innocent and cute story. Yeah. And that was very exciting. And Monica would have been in life.

I love with the whores. Well. Yeah. Can I do a quick shout out? Oh, you can do a ton. I want to do a shout out to my soulmate Kelly and Taylor Goodman. They're both big arm cherries and excited that I get to talk to you guys today. And then, Dax, I'm in recovery.

And day seven came out when I was really coming to terms with how dangerous and toxic my drinking was. I just want to say thank you so much for being so open and transatlantic. The biggest thing that you did for me was you really gave me hope that there was a beautiful life on the other side of addiction. I saw that you were successful and you had a family and friends and just this beautiful life that I didn't think I would ever have access to and that I didn't deserve. And so I just can't thank you enough for being a beacon of hope to all of us that have experienced the turmoil and tragedy of addiction. Oh, man, thank you.

My pleasure. That's wild. I'm happy it helped you. How long have you been sober? Almost a year. Awesome. I had some time stacked up, and then I tried it one more time. You're going to do it like a lady this time?

It wasn't great. There wasn't a lady about it. Definitely not. Yeah, every guy, you know, his big fantasy is like he'll be able to drink a glass of wine like a gentleman. Yeah. So he's like associated with it. Somehow you'll do it very classy. Two bottles later, you're like, wait, that was not the plan.

Yeah, when I'm asking the 80-year-old bartender at the VFW, if he knows where to get Coke, you all, I guess I wasn't a gentleman. I guess I wasn't exactly gentlemanly. Well, that's awesome. Congratulations. Yeah, so nice meeting you. Thanks for saying that. Thanks so much, y'all.

I appreciate it. Bye. Bye. I want to go ride a horse now. I liked that, but I'm not into riding horses. Right. You're scared of them. Yeah, they kick you, and you internal bleed.

Yeah. If you get behind a horse. them a lot. Well, if you fall off, that's how happens a lot. They come around and turn and start kicking. Step on you, me. You mean step on you? And they freak out and they're like doing, you know, they move their leg around and you're on the ground.

You know, and you asked if they bit anyone? Yeah. That also could be part of the falling in love with it, though, because some people like biting in sexual activity. It came up yesterday because we were talking about necks. I think necks are very attractive. And you kind of want to like put your mouth on it. You want to nibble it.

Yeah, a little bit. Oh, that's bad. Yeah, chum, chump, chump. Hello. And I see your name is in quote. So is that a fake name you've already supplied or do we got to come up with one for you? I've supplied Cynthia. Okay.

I appreciate that. A lot of people make us do the work for them. I had to name someone Betsy earlier today. Oh, did you? Yeah. And is Cynthia someone in your life that you like? We find that that's often what people do when they pick a fake name for this. Or you don't like.

Actually, it was the name my dad wanted to call me. Oh, it is. Okay. I always say I'm glad we didn't because I think of my nickname was sin. My life could have took a whole name. direction. Oh, right. Sure. Yeah, that would be an easy nickname to come up with. And where are you, Cynthia? I'm in Canada. Get out of here. We're three for four. Yeah, three for four. You Canadians like to unexpectedly orgasm. We now have enough data. That is enough. Yeah, that's plenty. A sample of four.

So please set the scene for us, Cynthia. Okay. This all started eight years ago. I drive to work every morning. It's a 45-minute drive. I enjoy. I'm driving, and I always have to pass over a train track. This one day I passed over the train track and it felt a little better than normal. So I pass over it and that led to what I'd like to call an unexpected celebration. Okay. And I'm thinking, okay, what's happening here? You know, I thought maybe it was metapause. My hormones are fluctuating. So I kind of go on my way and a couple days later, same thing happened. After the first time as you approach the railroad tracks, are you starting to already get a little titillated like it could happen again? No, just enjoying the drive, having my tea relaxing. And I thought maybe I was tense,

so I just tried to relax as much as I could. And the same thing happened. And Cynthia, is it a full orgasm or it is the hints of an orgasm? No, it led up to a full one. Wow. What a blessing. How big of a track? Well, the first time I kind of wanted to back up, go forward, back up, and go forward. It was exciting. Yes, yeah. But when it's it happening again, I'm like, well, something's going on here. So I was a little nervous. more so. I thought, should I pull off to the side of the road? What should I do? So no, I thought, you know, I'm a woman. I can multitask. There's no one on the highway. I should be good. A couple weeks pass, and my ex-husband and I are gone out to watch the music. It's a little

dive bar that has some really great local music. Place is dark. And without warning, we're sitting there and I have a full-blown... No, out of nowhere. Yes, not even a hint of anything. I'm like, what the fuck is happening to me? I was really freaked out. something was wrong with you maybe medically. Yeah. Yeah. That's when it was, this is not just hormonal fluctuation here. So I looked at my ex. He didn't even know what to do, what to say. And I said, I have no idea where that came from or how that happened. Luckily, it was dark. The music was loud. And I wasn't in front of anybody. Oh, my God. He detected it? Well, yeah.

Yes, he did. And I thought, okay, I need to get to the doctor. So you don't get it the next. day with doctor's appointments. So I had to wait a little bit. While I was waiting for my appointment, I think it was like a week or four days. We decided to go curling. I've only been twice in my life. Can we just say really quick for the folks? Not familiar with curling. This is the thing you've seen in the Olympics. There's a huge stone that gets slid down ice and there's little brooms and you're going next to it, right? Yeah. I'd equated to shuffleboard, but on ice. So anyway, one of our teammates were talking and stuff. He comes up from behind me, puts his hand on my shoulders. and I feel another one.

Oh, wow, wow. So I twist around really quickly and I lose my footing on the ice and I fall down, but I caught myself enough. It looks like I'm just doing a push-up, you know? I just got myself about five centimeters from my nose planting on the ice. So I'm totally discombobulated. It's not dark. There's no music. I can't hide this.

Yeah. But the whole idea of me falling, I think, shocked my body somehow. So everybody, you know, are you okay? okay, and I'm like, okay, they're concentrated on that. That's perfect. And I have to make up a bit of an excuse. I said, yeah, I'm fine. Just not feeling really great. So I think I'm going to set the rest of the game out. They don't think anything of it. They just think, okay, she slipped and I can be known the odd time to be clumsy. My doctor's appointments coming. I go to the doctor. Now, my doctor is very abrupt. She's 83. She's probably 84 or five this year. She's running out of time.

Yeah. She comes in and says, okay, what can I help you with today? And I break in, tears because I have to tell her and I feel a lot of shame over this. Yes. Uh-huh. Just so stupid, but yeah, very human. Oh, yeah, I know. I feel like a freak. I kept saying, what is going on with me? I tell her, I have involuntary orgasms. Right. And she looked at me in shock and she said, oh my God, don't tell anybody that. They'll laugh at you. Oh. That's okay. You have to know the doctor. That's what I expected from her. I said, no, I don't plan on telling a lot of people. Right. Sure. She says, I'll make some referrals for you. We go three years.

It's very hard to find somebody to help with this. I've got on the internet. I've contacted some people, but they just said, we only do the research in it. We're not doctors. We can't help you. And are you finding, though, in your internet searches that there are other people that have this condition. Is that happening?

And if so, is that comforting at all? What I found out was that it says there was only 4% of women have this. More than I would have thought. Yeah. I had to take some time off work. I work in the public sector. and searching and trying to find my own information. Is there any part of your brain that's suggesting that maybe you just enjoy this?

Or is that completely out of the realm of reason? No, it's not enjoyable anymore. And over that course of three years, is it happening often? Is it increasing or staying the same? When I'm off work, I'm more relaxed. Then the more relaxed I am, the less it occurs. Interesting. So it's like a stress response.

Yes. So I thought perhaps that's what's going on, is something psychological. But it's still occurring and I really don't know what to do. My kids are worried about me because they're saying, Mom, you feel like you're isolating yourself. And I said, I just need to spend some time. I told him was menopause. So then life threw me a bit of a change. My mom passes away unexpectedly. My husband and I break up two months later. And then I find out the next year that my dad has cancer and I take care of him. Now I bring this up because for some reason, I don't know if it's just someone's looking out for me

to give me a break some way, but everything kind of calmed down then, which I wouldn't expect because that was the most stressful year and a half of my entire life. I come home and I go back to work and it starts again. So I'm thinking, wow, I must find my job really stressful because this seems to be when it's happening and it gets worse. So I try to get accommodations from my work. I finally find out that what I have is called PGAD, persistent genital arousal disorder. Wow. Okay. It's a disorder So they're supposed to give me accommodations, but they keep saying the lawyer said, we don't have to. To fight, that would have brought a lot more stress. And really quick, when you get this diagnosis, is there any prescription available or is there any treatment that's known for it?

No, there is a medication, but I'm having severe menopausal symptoms as well at the time. So I didn't want to mess up too much with that. But I'm just happy. It's a big relief because there's a label to it. Yeah. Yeah. So it's comforting. I'm not alone.

That's mostly how I was feeling at that time. And it just happened at the same week, I find a psychotherapist, the next province over. It's probably a two-hour drive or so. And she says that she can see me as a patient. So I go to her the first time I drive there. And she says, she thinks the treatment for me is to masturbate more. And I said, okay, I'm single. You know, I'm not sure how much more I could do of this, but I'll give it my best.

By the way, no one's ever been given that homework. I know. You need to jerk off. It doesn't get rid of it. I go to her three times. I'm not getting anywhere. $300 every time. Same week, I find a practitioner in my hometown that I've never seen before. And I call and talk to him. And I said, I've been looking for eight years. I can't believe that I haven't seen you in any of my searches. And he informs me that the week before, they changed their Google analytics because people were finding him all over the world and not locally. Oh, weird.

So he treats people from all over the world for different symptoms, not just this. So I tell them what I have. He says, yes, I've treated women that have this. And he says, make an appointment to come in. So he does an exam my abdomen. And he says, oh, you've got a lot of shit in there. And I said, oh, okay, I didn't think that had anything to do with you. Like literally?

Yeah, that's what I thought he meant. He said, no, you have a lot of scar tissue in there. And he said, you've had surgery on your abdomen. I said, I had a hysterectomy 22 years ago. And he says the scar tissue is pushing down or pinching on a nerve that's leading to your vagina. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Yes. And that's what's causing the orgasms. Wow. Wow. It was mechanical. Yeah. I just felt like this guy was my new best friend. So anyway, we had treatment.

Now, the treatment is a shock wave therapy. It's a gadget that he can hold in his hand, but the treatment is like a jackhammer. It's breaking it up. I guess they use the same therapy. to break gallstones. Now, inappropriate question, but feels on topic. Look what we're talking about here. Do you have her orgasm while the jackhammer is happening? Okay, because you'd be hitting the scar tissue that's hitting the nerve and now we got repetitive jackhammering. Good question. It's very painful. I've had two children. I said, this feels like labor. He says, yeah, that's what a lot of

women say. And how long would these sessions be? An hour. And that's why there would be a week break. I'm not sure if it's six or eight times I did it. It got less painful as we went because there was less there. Finally, I got rid of it. I felt, I guess, what it feels like to be reborn or something. That's one of the reasons I want to tell the story because I said, yeah, I hear it's only 4% of women. He says, oh, no, it's much more than that. People are just too embarrassed. He treats women, I don't know how often, but he says I've been doing this for years. And is it generally that situation where there's some kind of scar tissue or could it run a gamut of causes? No, he asked me the first question was, have you had surgery in your abdomen? So that's

you what it is. Oh, my God. How interesting. This is fascinating. This one got medical in the most interesting way. Yeah. Hopefully this helps somebody. I was really nervous because I do work in the public sector and I don't want anybody to know who I am. But I didn't want that to take away from the fact that if anybody could feel like, wow, that has a label, they could get treatment for it. I was told after that he treated someone that had it for 20 years. Whoa. Her outlook on sex was that she did. never even wanted to go near it again because she didn't have the pleasure of it. It was more

the annoyance of it. Yes. Well, Cynthia says it was kind of a public service announcement. Yes, exactly. I just want to help somebody not feel alone. So how long have you been free of this? Just since the summer. Oh, no kidding. Wow. Back to work full time, no issues. I can concentrate on my day and what's in front of me and enjoy my life. Probably gives you someone's anxiety just like, oh God, I'm going to dysfunction. Is it going to happen here? I'm going to be with my kids. Is it going to happen there? Yeah, probably a ton of anxiety.

I actually didn't go very far. That's why my kids were saying, Mom, I had to tell them because they were getting really worried about me and they thought I was really depressed. I was in my room a lot because I thought I don't even want to be by anybody, especially my children. Right. No, no, that's probably the last thing you want to do.

Wow. Incredible story. Yeah, thank you. You're welcome. It's really nice meeting you guys. Yeah, you too. Stay warm up in Canada and happy holidays. All the best.

Take care. Wow, we really learned something big. Yeah. P-GAD. It makes sense. It certainly does. It's wild. I still have a hard time not being jealous of it.

I recognize it would be inconvenient. It would be bad if you were like at your kids' school. Oh, yeah. In the middle of an interview. And I just have to be like, like, like you guys would all know, but the guests would never. But then we'd have to, because the guests would be like, he has peagad oh jesus and then we have to tell her

but then they'd be like are you damp now it's best that they don't know so they're gonna know like are you damp now I don't want them to ask them yeah I don't either can men get peagad I hope no no I don't want to jinx myself fuck I'm a little on the fence

yes man can get it okay so for anyone listening if this is happening you got scar tissue bro you're gonna have to go up to Canada for treatment but that's okay it's a great place to visit Yeah, absolutely. All right. Well, that was sensational.

Yeah. Yeah. We're another great one in the books. There'll be a third for sure. All right, love you. Love you. Love you. Do you want to sing a tune or something?

I know a theme song. Oh. Okay, great. We don't have a thing song for this new show. So here I go, go, go. We're going to ask some random questions. And with the help of our Jerry's book, it's suggestions. I'm a flyer rhymedish, on the flyer rhymedish, enjoy.

Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondry app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Armchair Expert early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.