Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard - Flightless Bird: Haunted Houses

Episode Date: October 31, 2023

This week on Flightless Bird, David Farrier takes Monica to a haunted house to celebrate Halloween. And not just any haunted house! Each year Universal Studios puts on its Halloween Horror Nights, using its Hollywood tricks to create some of the scariest haunted houses in America. David and Monica meet with John Murdy, the creative director behind the haunted houses. Monica then comes face to face with her ultimate fear: Chucky. And not just one Chucky: Hundreds of Chucky’s. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I'm David Farrier, a New Zealander accidentally marooned in America, and I want to figure out what makes this country tick. Now this time last year, exactly this time last year, I investigated Halloween for Flightless Bird. I found out it had its origins in calcic harvest rituals before Christians made Halloween their holiday before eventually becoming scared of it themselves. The 7th century they had established this holiday called All Saints Day. In the 9th century, Pope Gregory, he said, why don't we put that around the time of this other holiday? They're celebrating the blessed dead. We'll have All Saints Day, November 1st,

and then the next day, we'll have All Souls Day for the souls in purgatory who didn't die on this day of grace who we're praying, and who we want to eventually go to heaven. In that episode, I also dispelled some Halloween urban legends. There was all this talk about the candies being poisoned, and your mother would look through, and then they'd make the apples and make sure there was no razor blades in the apples. Finally, I got a witch to visit my very old apartment to try and find out more about the ghost that was waking me up at 3am every morning. There is certainly energy here. There's certainly spirits here. Okay.

Yeah, I get this upper tummy, like just below the sternum, I get this kind of like rumbly feeling. It's now a year later. The ghost still haunts my room at 3am. And here we are at Halloween again. This year, I decided it was time to get out of my haunted apartment and go and get scared at another house, at a haunted house, a haunted house with Monica Mouse. So, make sure to be incredibly brave and don't even think about screaming, because this is the Haunted House episode. Haunted House with Monica Mouse was good writing, wasn't it?

Beautiful wordplay. That's why I get the big bucks. I wrote that and I had a little grin on my face. I was like, oh, I can't wait. Oh, it was great. That made me smile. It's Halloween. It's Halloween.

Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween to you. I love the fall. I love this time of year. This is exciting. It's really good. And something I've noticed from when we did the last episode for Halloween. So I remember last year being a bit like, oh man, Americans get really overboard.

This is cool, but it's too much. This year I'm feeling excited to see the decorations going up. My neighbor is investing in all those giant decorations from Home Depot. Depot, yeah. You know, there was a giant skeleton. Yes. But now they do all these other incredible monsters. Oh, you can go all out.

I mean, each one is about $400. And they are, her husband is like assembling these creatures. Are they rich? They can afford the monsters. Good for them. And they're really, really cool monsters. And so going there, it's like you're in a little haunted house. But my point is, I get it. Yes. It's exciting. I think it's the best of all the silly holidays that

happen during the year. I'm on board. Well, I like that. And that only took you, it was so fast. You became American so fast. Yeah. And you know what? I bought my first Halloween costume. Oh, you sent me a pic. It's scary, right? It's too scary. Tell people what it is. It's Pinhead from my favorite cosmic horror, Hellraiser. And it's just, it's all in the name.

It's just a man with pins in his head. Pinhead. Great name. But so scary. Very unsettling. And I sort of, I put it on. I looked at myself in the mirror and I was like, I can't wait to scare some children. Like that was my first thought.

It's going to be fun. Are you coming to the hayride? Oh, tell me about the hayride thing. Yeah, I've never been. You should come. It's tonight. Yeah, no, I'll go. Explain what happens.

It's in the neighborhood. Dax is on a tractor. There's hay. Yep. And also just explain to. There's hay. Yep. And also just explain to me the whole hayride thing. Because you can go to hayrides all over America, right? You get on a tractor, they drag you around in hay. What is it?

Yeah. And they often make it scary. Like that's, well, I guess not always, but we have one in LA. Monsters and stuff. Yeah, just like fun Halloween things. You drive through like a Halloween scene. And so what is Dex driving? He drives a Tesla because Teslas can pull a ton of weight.

Okay. And we're all in a trailer? Yeah, an open trailer. All sitting in the trailer on our butts. All sitting full of hay. Full of hay. In our costumes. It's a little itchy, but it's worth it.

And then he, from the front, blares Halloween music. He makes a cute little playlist and just drives through the neighborhood blasting the Halloween music. I like this. People from the neighborhood get in. They just pop in and ride around. They pop out. It's so fun. It's such a communal event yeah great brings the neighborhood

together yeah and i think that's what i didn't understand when i first moved here is that it it is a community event it's how neighbors meet each other it's not that scary it's more fun is my point well it is scary if your neighbors poison you and that's always an option have you heard about this australian this crime that's happened alleged crime so look i'm probably going to get the facts a little bit wrong because it happened a few months ago now but basically this woman served up dinner for her in-laws mushrooms and they all died no because they were poisonous mushrooms. She, for some reason, was the only one that mysteriously didn't eat the mushrooms. And she's saying it was an accident? She's still in the hospital, though.

Oh. What? That's a big fact. No, no, she didn't eat the mushrooms, though. She was all clear. She'd used some dried mushrooms and they were poisonous. I think they're still investigating. Really?

They found she'd disposed of a blender in the rubbish tip that she'd used to blend the mushrooms. And so why was that at the tip? That's suspicious. You don't make dinner with a blender and then put that blender in the tip. Yeah, three people died and one person is in critical condition. Wow. Yeah, it's actually horrific. It's not funny at all.

What's sort of incredible is this is really, you should seek it out. There's an interview with her. The news door stops her soon after this has happened. And it's just clearly someone who's quite stressed out about the situation because it's a bad look. You know, you serve up poisonous mushrooms that kill three people and you just happen not to eat them.

Okay, this is so intense because if she did it, so much fear. And also what? What's going on with her? And wow. So intense. Whoa. But also if she didn't do it on purpose,

this is horrific. You've killed people you love on accident. People think you did it on purpose. People are at your door. You're probably in mourning. All people will remember was the headline of when it happened. They won't remember the exoneration or anything. They'll at your door. You're probably in mourning. All people will remember was the headline of when it happened. They won't remember the exoneration or anything. They'll always be

suspicious. There's one more bit of information. So her children weren't there. She gave them leftover beef wellington the next day, but scraped off the mushrooms. But the people who were poisoned would probably have been in the hospital by the time she served it to the kids. I reckon that would hit quick. Yeah, I don't know why she would not throw it out immediately. And look, I might, again, it's dangerous to be throwing sort of half-remembered facts about a news story that you read, but I also believe she possibly tried to poison someone else in the past.

That was the last line of one of the news articles. Wow. So yeah, it's really juicy and has Australia and New Zealand kind of enthralled. It's a ding, ding, ding. Wow. I mean, have you ever served dinner to someone but not eaten the thing that you're serving? No, of course not. Of course not.

But also, and I do these girls' dinners at least once a month and I have everyone over. They're so fun. But I always, every single time they leave, while I'm cleaning up, I think, please, just nobody get sick tonight. Nobody get food poisoning from this. I have a fear every time. Yeah. What a disaster. How embarrassing would that be?

Yeah. Imagine wiping everyone out. I had a friend that served octopus and it came with, I don't know how you meant it, because it comes with ink. And basically she was meant to remove the ink maybe or cook it in a different way. And she absolutely wiped out the entire dinner party with this inky octopus. You were there? No, no, it's this infamous thing, but it's exactly as you're saying. Even the chicken I get panicky about.

And yeah, the risk is much lower. I've been thinking, because there was that documentary that won the Oscar about the octopus, my octopus teacher, about this man who sort of befriended an octopus and hung out with it underwater. But it is one of those things where that did make me apprehensive about eating octopus. I mean, they are really smart. They're so, so smart. And apparently have really

sentient feelings. Yeah. And then it put me on the path of like, but I'm eating McDonald's all the time. I know. And then go, anyway. Halloween, we went to a haunted night together. We sure did. And I had my microphone. I documented the night. In hindsight, did you have a good time or a bad time? I had a very good time. It was fun, right? I'm really glad we went. I'm glad you dragged me there because I was on the fence. You were. Because I'm a bona fide fraidy cat. I'm scared of stuff.

I'm scared of anything, all things, let alone things that are actively trying to be scary. Although I will say, I think I'm less scared of those things than the unseen. Like the lady who kills her in-laws, allegedly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where do you sit on ghosts? I never believed in ghosts. I still don't. I think you have affected me a little bit.

You're a ghost, Derek. Yeah. We named him Derek. Still waking me up. It's a real thing. He makes me a little It's a real thing. He makes me a little anxious that he's real. I'm still 96% sure he's not real.

Swear to God, I'm still waking up at 3 a.m. every night, except when I'm not in my house. Back in New Zealand, wasn't waking up at 3 in the morning. I know, but I just think brains, ding, ding, ding, octopus, they're smart. And they do things without our knowledge. You'll say my brain has learned this behavior almost. You can learn when to wake up in the morning, too. No, your brain doesn't have a clock in there. Of course it does. No, it's not an alarm system. It's literally called your, I think it's called your internal clock.

Yeah, but if you have to be up at a certain time in the morning and you're anxious about sleeping in, you can wake up at that time. Oh, for sure. I think your brain and body are now programmed to do it in that environment. To do this thing. So I'm not waking up at 3 a.m. every morning going, just, hi, Derek. Move on for nothing. Yeah. Did you name him Derek?

Or he told you his name was Derek? No, he hasn't talked to me. He's just, I feel him. David's never seen him or talked to him. I've felt him. You've only felt him. He hovers over my body every night. He comes in the window.

He floats in. He hovers over me. I wake up. I say, hello. I don't mean you any harm. He floats back out. Same thing next night and every fucking night. To answer your question, David made up his name.

But I like it. I think it suits him. Do we have any updates on the pool? Oh, the pool? Thankfully, the times of the day that I go that are quite obscure, I haven't noticed a major change. Okay. Yeah, which means either I'm swimming at the right time or our listeners aren't swimmers. Yeah, I can't tell if that's a good or bad thing.

It's hard to tell. Yeah, the optics are confusing. You guys, comment if thing for us. It's hard to tell. The optics is confusing. You guys, comment if you're a swimmer in the comments. I'm curious. Curious to know how many people are swimmers David style or non-swimmers Monica style. Okay, Halloween.

Come along with us as we experience terror. Do you want to set the scene of where we are? This is so full on. I thought we were just coming in for a Halloween night, but we're sort of at a red carpet, sort of. There's a whole carpet here with people walking on it that I don't know. My guess is they are probably Universal stars.

It's just about 7 p.m. and I've invited Monica to Universal Studios, where during September and October, they have Halloween Horror Nights. This theme park is meant to have some of the best haunted houses in Los Angeles, and so it seemed like a good place to come to experience the American haunted house. Turns out, we'd arrived on opening night,

so there's a red carpet, and various celebrities we don't know are buzzing around in front of us. It feels very LA. We're at the premiere of a haunted house, pretty much. Multiple, and it's going to be so scary, and I'm trying not to be scared. You were saying in the car quite confidently that you didn't think you were going to be scared. How are you feeling now that we're sort of on the grounds about to go in? I'm feeling scared. What's your main scare?

For me, it's I get really scared by humans with animal heads. Wow. Okay. In real life, I'm scared of murderers and kidnappers. That's why that was in my prayer. No kidnappers, no robbers. In the world of things you know aren't real, what gets you in the world of movies?

There's going to be a Chucky thing in here. Demented kids scares me. Is it because they're little and creeping along or is it because they're children? Yeah it's because they're kids and like kids are wily already and so if they're demented. I'm with Monica. One of my greatest fears is having a child who turns out to be wily and demented. Anyone who's read the book or watched the movie We Need to Talk About Kevin knows what I mean. And then of course there's Chucky. I know Monica hates the demented doll and I'm excited that one of the new haunted houses this

year is nothing but Chucky. Haunted houses first appeared during the Great Depression. Haunted houses first appeared during the Great Depression. Halloween pranks had gotten out of hand, and so they were kind of invented by adults to distract kids. Now it's 2023, and they're for adults as much as kids. The production value is here in Hollywood as high as they get. Before we go inside, we meet up with John Murdy, the creative director behind The Haunted Houses, will be screaming in tonight.

I've been a horror fan since I was four, because that's when I saw Frankenstein for the first time. And something about those films just, you know, drew me in from a really, really young age. And, you know, horror has been a huge part of my life ever since. Halloween is a giant part of America that I'm still figuring out. When did it get into your blood? I was born and raised in Southern California.

My trick-or-treating career was very, very short because when I was 10 years old, I started building haunted houses in my parents' garage. 77, Star Wars themed. That was my first haunted house. I didn't ask permission from George Lucas, so hopefully he'll forgive me that. I was 10.

By the time he was 14, John had 200-odd people lining up outside his haunted house. His dad had to step in at some point to rein things in a little. But tonight, the reins are off. Since 2016, he's been refining the haunted houses here to make them as scary as possible. What makes a good haunted house? In my opinion, you need three things. You need characters, whether it's from a film, a TV show, a myth like Monstros, the Monsters of Latin America, one of our houses this year. It's all drawn from Latin American myths and legends. But you need characters that can translate to performers.

And our performers in Horror Nights are called scare actors. The second thing you need is great environments, iconic environments that are recognizable from whatever the property is. And the last thing, you know, it really comes down to the fans. Do they want to see it? Is it something they've told us through social media? Because our fans are very, very vocal. They are engaged with us year round and they tell us what they want to see. So those are kind of the three magic ingredients into creating a memorable haunted house. Why do you think Americans love being scared this much? Like there's a fandom around just being scared. Yeah. Well, we study that and then we use it against you. That's what we do. All your phobias, all your fears, that's stuff we study and then we turn it on you and make you deal with it.

That's really what it is. It's very similar to riding a roller coaster. If you think about when you were a kid and the first time that you were going to try to ride a roller coaster that you were afraid to ride, you're waiting in line, there's all that nervous energy and anticipation. It's the same thing with kids, and meaning, you know, older kids that come to Halloween Horror Nights. Once they've done it, it's like a badge of honor, a rite of passage. And I think that's really what it's all about. Before we head inside, I had one final question for John, a man who's been getting off on scaring people since he was 10 years old. He's probably a psychopath.

We should lock him up and throw away the key. Monica hates tiny, scary children like Chucky. How is she going to cope with things tonight? You're probably not going to fare well because I'm having a little spat with Chucky at the moment. He's really mad at me because I've never given him his own haunted house. We finally did it, but then he hijacked the whole thing. He raised an army of killer good guy dolls.

And his goal is to create the ultimate kill count so that he could be top dog in the world of serial killer, not just serial killer dolls, but all horror movie characters. So that's his goal. And he's got the perfect setup for it because everybody's just waiting in line. And that's what he said he's going to do. So I feel compelled to warn you. This is the best news imaginable. As we walk towards the main gates of Universal, Monica genuinely looks unsure of things. She usually seems quite put together, at the top of her game.

But I think the cracks are showing. There's now going to be a whole army of these tiny doll kids. What a face you she appears, Monica. Also, while we were talking to him, I bit my lip. And I think it's bleeding. So it's already horror. It's already on brand. I'd warned her to wear sneakers on her tiny feet as we might need to do some running.

As someone checks our tickets, I look around me and notice the swarms of horror fans here tonight. A lot of them are in black, head to toe, wearing hoodies and t-shirts of their favorite horror films. It's kind of overwhelming. Now, if we get lost, Monica, we're going to meet back here at the front, okay? If we get lost, this is where we meet. But don't you have your phone? Can't you just text me? Oh, yeah, that's true. Okay, but if our phones die, we meet right here by this fountain.

These horror nights have become fairly iconic here in Los Angeles. I mean, they have Universal Studios behind them. They help cement monsters like Dracula and the Mummy in pop culture. They know special effects. They know how to make you feel scared. Monika and I push into the crowd, and realise that some of those in the mix are actually actors, ready to scare us. How much on alert do I need to be?

I think there are people lurking in just the general crowd who will jump out at you, occasionally. Okay. Okay! I'm gonna- oh god, oh god! Oh no, I hate this, I hate this, I hate this. We're not even near any of the haunted houses here tonight, but suddenly a man bursts from the crowd. He's carrying a chainsaw and zeroes in directly on Monica. And by zeroes in, I mean he charges at her, chainsaw revving. Monica's just run away from a man with a chainsaw.

This is the best. Oh, what are we doing? I hate this. I hate this. You ran straight away. And then he followed me. Having Monica here is kind of great because I'm scared too, but she's more scared I hate this. You ran straight away. And then he followed me! Having Monica here is kinda great because I'm scared too, but she's more scared,

which makes me seem like the brave one. This will be a good bonding experience for us. Fear bonds people together. It's really special. I know, but I think you're just gonna leave me in the lurch. You know, you're safe with me. It's okay. Are you sure?

AHHHH! You know, you're safe with me. It's okay. Are you sure? It continues like this for the next 15 minutes. I keep trying to talk to Monica about the experience, then something scares her and she screams and runs away. It's really hard. They get super close. I could feel the heat of the chainsaw. I think things have calmed down when a fan approaches Monica. But turns out in this setting, that was scary too. I thought that lady was... I thought she was a scary lady because she was beelining towards us. Just a fan of yours.

Regular. She's an armchair. Stay away. She had wild eyes. As we walk further in, metal music is blaring, heightening the already unhinged atmosphere. Eventually, we make it through the chainsaw attacks and things seem calmer.

It's very visceral because we all know what chainsaws do. Yes, yes. The main thing you're warned as a kid is to stay away from the chainsaws. Oh, I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. We head towards some very long escalators to descend towards some of the haunted houses. The sun setting. And it's a moment of tranquility before the real horror starts.

What's that sunset? A dream to live here. There's a picture of me. I must be 10 or 11 or something. My family came and there's a picture of me at the Hollywood sign. It's like, I'm going to live here one day.

And I do. As we travel down the final escalator, the sun finally sets and we descend into darkness and more importantly, into terror. How are you doing reliving that night, Monica? I forgot how much you screamed, actually. It was so good. I kept trying to talk to you and you'd just scream and run away,

scream and run away, scream and run away. You had bad timing. You would always try to talk when a chainsaw guy would come out. The great thing about the actors there that we both noticed is that once they know that you're scared, they remember you. Because you were getting quite fucked off. I was. By the end. Yeah. Right? You're like, just stop. Stop.

And then you'd see another one and you'd be angry and then they'd just prey on you even more. Yeah. I mean, I guess, spoiler, but at the end, we were walking out and we had to walk back through the chainsaw guys you look so fed up i was so you're just tired you're exhausted and then we get to the front and we were like are there bathrooms i was like i'll just hold it until we get home and you're like no we're here let we should just go now. And then we had to go back through those guys in order to get to the bathroom. And that's when I was mad. What are we doing?

Why are we doing this? I hate these people. I don't often see your mad face. And it was really fun to see, like, you just fed up expression. Because it's not something I see very often. And I really do enjoy it. I wanted to yell at these guys. It's a strike.

You shouldn't even be here. I don't think they're SAG. Yeah, off union. They are acting. And you do wonder the people that are attracted to those roles. Because when you're in the haunted house being an actor, you're just in the one place, just continuously scaring for hours. It must do something to your psyche.

You almost, I think you must get so bored of it. Yeah, the same reactions every time. And then that's where my real neuroses and real fear starts to creep in. Because I feel like it might make you go mad. Like it might make you go actually crazy. Actually go demented. And then you have access to all these people. You're dressed up.

You have the weapon. And if you go crazy at any moment, everyone's dead. And also, everyone just thinks it's part of the act. Exactly. So you could be murdering someone in one of those rooms. More people would be filing through. And they'd just be like, oh, this room's quite bloody and scary. This is part of it.

Very realistic. Yes. And you could probably just kill all night exactly that's a there's a movie plot in that i bet there is a movie yeah there's a haunted house it's closed down now but it used to be set at an old psychiatric hospital out of the city maybe 40 minutes you'd go and so the actual settings were terrifying because it's an old closed down psychiatric hospital and there were always rumors that old patients who had been let out when it closed would walk the grounds and so

whenever you went through that haunted house there was always this idea that some of them were like previous patients who had like wandered back to this place and then you can't tell who's an actor and who's the thing that's the scary thought there's a documentary about it called spookers it's actually really good it's about the actors there and what they're actor and who's the patient. That's the thing. That's the scary thought. There's a documentary about it called Spookers. It's actually really good. It's about the actors there and what they're about and who they are. And it's actually kind of special because some of them, like, find themselves in those moments of acting. It's like this whole other community of actors.

I mean, I do love that they're called, at Universal, that they're called Scarectors. They have this very specific name. And I bet they do feel like it's a community. I also love that there's this guy and his job is just to design haunted houses. He started doing it when he was 12. And now he's doing it at one of the biggest theme parks. And that's a job for an adult man is building haunted houses.

I do love that. There's a job for everything. There is. Dream big. Dream big. In Dark Tours tours you did a semi haunted house right yeah mckamey manor yeah around the midwest they'll do you sign a waiver and they're allowed to touch you and fuck with you yeah that's fucked up yeah i mean that mckamey

manor is this and full disclosure i didn't get very far like i opted out pretty quickly because the idea is no one makes it through and no one does. But that's more just because he's kind of torturing you. The thing with the haunted house that we knew, no one is going to touch us. At McKamey Manor, you do actually get assaulted. You sign up for that. And so that's a whole other haunt. Also, I feel like we touched on this for a second on the fact check right after me and you went. But how can they be so sure they're not going to touch you?

They get so close. There are a couple of times where I thought, you're breaking the rules. If I just jolt a little bit, you'll touch me. You're going to be in contact. We're in a Sioux hungry country. I was also thinking, isn't there the worry that you will give someone a heart attack? I don't think you sign a waiver when you buy your ticket for these things. We didn't sign anything.

No, no, no, no. It is a thing. But to their credit, no one did touch you. That I know of. I mean, I have so much adrenaline. I just don't,

I can't be sure. With that hold up in court, no one touched me that I knew of. But you're right. It's like a thin line. They get very, very close. Because they're kind of like hopped up on their role.

They are. They're hopped up on the adrenaline of fear. Stay tuned for more Flightless Bird. We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors. Flightless Bird is sponsored by BetterHelp. How's therapy going for you, David? Therapy's going good. I have been in regular therapy now for about four months.

That's great. And it's working out for me because my brain often gets in the way of things, even when I know what I'm sort of meant to be doing. And you can talk to friends and stuff, and that's great. But having a therapist who can kind of swoop in and sort of break things down, it's like an outlet. Yes. Because you walk around with all these things sort of building up in your brain

and just knowing you've got the space. Yeah, it's really good. Yeah. I'm becoming more American in embracing therapy. I love that. And yeah, it helps you figure out what's holding you back as well because sometimes you just walk along and you don't really understand what the thing is that isn't working.

Yes. And having a therapist kind of take you through that and break it down, super helpful. If you're thinking of giving therapy a try, give BetterHelp a go. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible and suited to whatever your schedule is.

You just fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch them at any time for no additional charge. Make your brain your friend with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash bird today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash bird. All right, let's get back in here.

As we spend the night getting scared, we started to think about real life scares. When I was living in New Zealand on my own in my apartment, I woke up at about one in the morning and I just saw a man standing like at the end of my bed. And okay, so spoiler alert, it was just a hat on like a edge of a shelf. But to me, it was a man and I lay there being like okay what do I do I'm alone in my apartment no because I was like just planning what to do oh so what I did was I started yelling and screaming like a maniac and ran outside of the apartment onto the street yeah I get that and that was my solution and then you peeked back in and it was a hat.

Yeah. My technique was not to attack, but just to yell and scream and run. Everyone has their own real-life scare stories. Everyone around us here tonight. Many of them much scarier than an outline of a hat in the dark. Scariest thing that's happened to you in your real life? A real- life scary thing? Blood clot.

Yeah, blood clot. Yeah, I had a blood clot. It was very scary. The brain? No, no. Yeah, you would think. No, it was to my arm, which is a rare one. Monica tells me it's rude to question Americans about their health ailments, which, frankly,

is fair enough. What is the worst way of dying, do you think? Um, underwater suffocation, I think. Like, a car that gets underwater and you're stuck in that car. Oh, my God. Also, because I can't swim, you know, it's like this added element. I think mine is buried alive. Like, the whole claustrophobia thing gets me every time.

I don't mind having my head chopped off or something like that. That's okay. Quick and easy. It wouldn't be quick. They have to slowly chop it off. Like, yeah. Yeah, it would take a long time. Yeah, it's not like a quick decapitation.

I mean, dying in general is a big fear of mine. So I like to think that a night like this is kind of some sort of catharsis around death. If you're going to get deep and meaningful, isn't that what it's about? Like confronting death and surviving? I think so. I think it has to do with controlled fear. Most of our fears are uncontrollable. We don't know, but this is like, you know you're going to be okay, really. We see signs to two haunted houses in front of us.

We've made it. The Last of Us is in front of us. And The Exorcist, because there's a new Exorcist film, and that's very scary. What's scarier for you, possessions by a demon or zombies? Uh, possessions. I'm not scared at all. I should never say that, because I'm obviously going to be so scared. It's scary if they make it scary where they get in your face and they're all bloody like that.

I've discovered that when Monica gets scared, she sounds a bit bossy. It's time to navigate the huge lines that have built up to the exorcist house. There's so many people here in line. Have you ever seen a line that thick? It's insane. It's not just a line. ever seen a line that thick? That's insane. It's not just a line, it's a thick line of like 10 people wide. There's a buzz in the line. People are excited, fizzing. Yasmeen and Frankie look to be in their early 20s and they're pumped. What's your favorite thing about Halloween in America?

Honestly, the thrill of it. It's just awesome. I feel like it's soul awakening, I guess. Honestly, I'm an actor, so I studied film. So just looking into monsters and stuff like that, just growing up with it. I don't know, it just feels like home sometimes. You can watch Christmas movies or Thanksgiving movies, anything like that. But when it comes to Halloween movies, it's just so amazing. Especially every year, there's coming with original ideas, new ideas, remakes, reboots, requels, everything you got right there. It just makes it even better. I think it's something about it being dark and the anticipation. I was worried about the strobes inside, about Monica's seizures, but she reckoned she'll be okay.

I imagine if she did start seizing, people would just think it was part of the show. We can hear screams coming from inside, and eventually it's our time to go into the exorcist house. Something scary is gripping my arm. Monica is gripping on tight. The house is full of gross stuff, blood, dead animals. Monica says, ew, a lot. Ew!

Oh, God! Then the scares start coming thick and fast. Actors pounce from behind doors, dressed as possessed victims. Monica's coming undone. Gripping my sound gear, I can dissociate a little. I'm here to document. It makes me feel safe. But Monica's lost it.

She's a hot mess. It's hot in these horror houses, and this year they've added some bad smells. We pass through a barn of some kind and it smells like a barn. It's visceral and it's hard not to lose yourself in it completely. But eventually we emerge into the cool night air,

both of us very much on edge. And that's our night, going in and out of haunted houses. Something called Holidays in Hell, and one based entirely around the Last of Us video game and TV show. And while each of these houses had its own unique, harrowing ways, when I reviewed the audio, it was all the same. In each house, it was just Monica screaming and yelling. You're being very brave, Monica. I yelled too. I wasn't immune. No! I hate leprechauns.

From each house, we emerge hot and sweaty, but relieved. Relieved to be free. I'm so sweaty, like my face is dripping. I know, oh my god, we did not dress appropriately. I'd noticed another thing about Monica. She was getting annoyed at me for not protecting her. But what was I meant to do? Attack the monsters? Attack the actors? They need to stay back because if they on accident touch me, I'm suing. I'm suing. This is your fault. You'll have to live with that. What will you do if I'm dead tomorrow because of this? As we're talking about dying, a car with flashing lights passes by. There's another car following slowly.

I wonder if someone's fainted or something. I mean, we're getting a little delirious. We're sweating so much from fear and running and we haven't had any water or snacks. I know, I'm exhausted. And I'm hungry. As we stumble around trying to find some bad food and some water,

one of the staff members starts talking to us, curious about the microphone. He's a young guy, gripping a brush and shovel. He's here to keep things clean. How's your night going? It's good, it's good. How's y'all night going? It's going really well. What's the scariest thing you've seen tonight, would you say, in your job? A fight with a scare actor right now.

He just said, a fight with the scare actor right now. He just said a fight with the scare actors right now. A sentence I didn't quite clock at first. He's saying that somehow a member of the public got into a fight with some of the actors tonight. What Moniker and I had been thinking about earlier. I guess this is why we saw those flashing lights. A fight? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What happened?

This scare actor, he was fighting with another person because he got scared too much in the maze. flashing lights. big theme or a whole bit me you broke up a fight tonight yeah I did yeah okay who came out on top the actor or the scared tourist I think the actor cuz likes security jump on him so yeah they just jaybo do yeah why because people can't control themselves when they're scared yeah it does it does happen a lot yeah it's like it just happens regularly. I'm surprised, but working here, yeah, it happens often, especially this time. Yeah. Well, you, sir, are a hero. You broke up that fight. You're a good man. You're keeping everything clean. It's so nice to meet you. Nice to meet you guys. I'll definitely follow your podcast, guys. You guys are cool. Yeah. Have a good night, man. You too.

And with that fight in mind, fights that happen often apparently, we head into Monica's version of hell. The Chucky haunted house. The ultimate wily, demented child. Maybe I'll have to fight him off. I'm actually, I'm pretty nervous about whatever nightmares I'm going to have tonight after all of this. What are my dreams going to be? Chucky was birthed in America in 1988 thanks to a horror film called Child's Play. In the movie, a widow buys a doll for her son.

Little does she know, the doll is possessed by a dead serial killer. Bad luck for the kid and nearly everyone else in the film besides Chucky. And so with that in mind, we walk into Monica's worst nightmare. Just because their eyes are weird. They're like glass marbly eyes. In the line, she's not alone in her fears. I don't know. Just I don't like the idea of like a small little person like chasing me.

Suddenly, Monica has a revelation about horror and about haunted houses and about why fear can be sort of special. Where everyone's sharing the exact same emotion, it feels good. It feels very unifying. I think that's part of it, because if you're afraid on your own, it's horrific. But being afraid with a group. Yeah, there's something that's like, oh, we're all in this together. Yeah, it's kind of beautiful.

Chucky. First time and last time I'll ever say that. And with that... I have to take a deep breath. We do the final haunted house. Ah! David! Ah!

Stop it! And yes, there is violence in there. Violence against me. Monica just punched me. This haunted house has turned Monica full feral. Okay, you're halfway through. How are you feeling? Halfway?

Oh no, I thought we were almost done. She's in survival mode. And you know what? She survives. We emerge alive. Monica, you did really, really, really well. Thanks. I feel depleted. I feel like you faced one of your greatest fears and you came out the other side a bigger person.

Thank you. I'll take it. I'll take it. Not any help by you. I tapped your shoulder one time to make sure you're okay. And you lashed out at me. You tapped my shoulder to scare me. Chicken tap. And you hit me with violence. You used violence.

Yeah, I did. And I will. I'll continue to. Oh. That was fun. I'm glad you brought us here. Thank you. Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween.

So for the record, there was one bit of violence in the entire night. Well, actually a few if we go on what that guy told us, but it was you against me. Yeah, you instigated that. me yeah you instigated that at the most extreme time of fear you poked me literally and figuratively and then you tried to claim it was a protective nudge it was a protective there's no such thing what is that what's a protective nudge well you're afraid of someone accidentally grabbing you, he grabs you. Yes. Thank you, Rob. Yeah, it was an amazing reaction. And I got to see a new side of you.

The truth is, I will stick up for myself. Yeah, absolutely. If someone attacks, I'll punch. I'm still blown away by the revelation we had in there from someone who wrote at Universal who says fights are not uncommon. They happen. And it's exactly what you were talking about. The idea of people getting too scared and maybe lashing out or something happening, that goes down. When we have psychologists on who say that you're in your reptile brain, your amygdala, that is what's happening when your fear level is so high.

Totally. And you just lash out. Your frontal lobe is offline. So you almost, you can't even get in trouble or be responsible for having that sort of reaction. I always remember when I worked in the newsroom, I witnessed the most incredible thing. And I'll often debate the merits of both sides with friends. But my buddy was sitting really concentrating at his computer.

He's like typing away. And a colleague came up behind him wet her finger and gave him what's called a wet willy have we talked about wet willies in regards to the oh we haven't we haven't i thought maybe we got into this when i cracked the egg on roosevelt's head about the idea of what constitutes a soul and what's friendship and a joke but anyway the wet willy was a thing did you hear wet wet willies? Yeah, we have them in America. We have them in America. So I watched this happen and she gave Dan a wet willy

and his lizard brain kicked in. He just got a fright. He was full of rage. I just remember him getting up and she saw what she'd activated in him and just fucking ran. And this person let out a roar and just chased her. And this chase, fortunately, the chase deflated the lizard brain. It's not like he got up and lashed out, but it was a really amazing chase.

I think it's so interesting because obviously the wet willy was a bad move. You can't do that. Nope. Certainly not in today's world. But also you can't chase someone aggressively screaming. But this is where we get into self-defense. Yeah. And I get conflicted, I guess.

You can't shove your finger in someone's ear. You definitely can't. And then you can't be a victim when the person has a reaction to that. I agree. I agree. Because it is this lizard brain. Yeah. They're not thinking.

They're acting out of fight or flight. Yeah, completely. It's immediate reaction, though. If he's going to chase her, I feel like Lizardbrain is gone at that point. If it was like a quick turn in elbow or something, then I feel like Lizardbrain. I think, to be fair, the chase as he was running, it lessened the Lizardbrain. It's not like he caught her and got into a huge fight. His reaction was to get up and get her.

Just attack. Yeah. Yeah, it's funny how you're reminded just suddenly you are this, like, back in caveman days. And you're just like, ah. We are animals. Yeah, no, we are. We think we're all ahead of that, but we're really not.

Oh, God. And not to take it here, because this is. It's always a good sign. This is bad. You know what? This is why we have to train our law enforcement so specifically, because they are in fearful situations all the time, and they cannot act out of their lizard brain.

Well, I think that's why it's so crazy to me, because I always find the police here so scary because they carry weapons. In New Zealand, some carry guns now, but mostly it's tasers. But in New Zealand, there's always stories of like that lizard brain kicking in and you suddenly fire a taser off and like people screw things up. Obviously, America has so many issues in our law enforcement in this way where people are shooting people. Oh, you're suddenly in these situations where, yeah, it's all on. Yeah, you are, I guess, having to deal with your lizard brain activating. It's not like you can intellectually go in there and sort everything out.

Yeah, and a lot of people, I think, think it's just 100% racism. And race is a huge factor here, and it's underlying, even when people don't know it. and it's underlying, even when people don't know it. But part of it is, I don't think they're necessarily trained to turn that amygdala off. There must be a way to. Maybe it's just that no one should have guns. I mean, that really could be the answer. It seems to be the answer in all these other countries. Yeah, I think it would be a big help.

I guess that's why they have those crazy courses where you're meant to run through reacting to targets. You see the good guy pop up, and then you see the bad guy pop up, and you've got to choose. And that seems like something you have to really train for. Just desensitization. Yeah, yeah, basically. Yeah. I mean, another bad place to take it. This is sad, but I have the thought. I want to ask you if you had the thought when we were there, there could be shooting here always that's the unfortunate thing about crowds anytime we're in a crowd now yeah it is that's the world we live in that I guess when I was a kid I'd never think about in America or back in New Zealand yeah crowds feel scary I just came back from a film

festival and I was sitting in a theater a lot of the day, you look for exits, right? It's that really sad universe we live in. And at Universal, I think that's probably part of the fear is in those houses, you are closed in. Exactly. And the only exit is into another scary room. And that feels... If you let your brain go there, you can feel very trapped. And if something bad were to happen, there's no chance for me. And also because it's all scary sounds and it's loud and it could go down. One of the most surreal things, there was a band called the Eagles of Death Metal and they played at the venue with the Bataclan. There was basically a shooting at that gig and the band hid and traumatic people died Terrific knew the drummer at that show for Eagles of Death Metal. Yeah, right the singing ended up in New Zealand

Jesse Hughes, yeah I mean that really messed with him and I ran into him in New Zealand through mutual friends and he was this was months after And he was just a complete wreck and I think just every show now for anyone in that band That's never to leave you right never that's like the most extreme version of it all of trauma yeah and yeah and he just wanted some weed just to calm down like that's what he needed and he was just in a fucking state well that's the real scary stuff for you jesus i'm glad we went there. Yeah, it's Halloween. Is your fear of Chucky gone? Great question.

No. I was considering having Vincent dress as Chucky for Halloween, but Natalie vetoed it. Okay, good. Very adamantly. No, absolutely not. Because what if someone punches him? Well, not the scary version. There's no not scary version.

There's no not scary version of Chucky. Overalls in a rainbow sweater with orange hair. That's still version. There's no not scary version. They're all scary. There's no non-scary version of Chucky. Overalls in a rainbow sweater with orange hair. That's still scary. It's triggering. It is. And then if someone punches your kid, that's on you. He's going to be running around. Oh, God.

Okay, I'm really glad she said no to that. It was really fun doing a haunted house with you. I loved listening to the audio back. And I was originally, it was this episode, I was like, we're going to take the audience through each haunted house. But listening to all of them, literally, it all sounds the same. It's the same. Just a lot of screaming.

Just a lot of me being really, really scared. I want to know, how scared were you really? Because you put on a brave face, and I think you did channel your fear into amusement over my fear. Yeah, you were a big help for me. But no, I definitely, I was scared. Like my heart rate was up. I was super sweaty. There were actors that would, when you'd go through a door into a new room,

they would often come out from behind you as you went in. And I found that horrific. Yeah. And I was hunching down and you didn't see any of it. I was yelling as well. I just had the mic on you. So I came out really for the audience very brave, but I was yelling, but I just didn't have the mic close to my face. Right. In the first haunted house, we were a pair, you know, we went in together and we felt like a team. By the end, you were many steps behind me, just trying to gather my audio.

Using you as a shield. Exactly. As I predicted, leaving me in the lurch. So I was correct. Yeah, and actually, that's really important. You went in first into most of those rooms, and that is true bravery. I was behind, and so that is where the coward typically goes. It was for the sake of the show. Otherwise, I never, I would have said, true bravery. I was behind. And so that is where the coward typically goes. It was for the sake of the show. Otherwise, I never, I would have said, you definitely have to go first. I'm not going. I can't be peer pressured either. So I'm surprised I even did this. I'm proud of myself. Just finally, we all have to watch some scary movies together. Australian movie,

which I keep lecturing you about. Talk to me. I think we all finally need to watch that together. Super scary. And I also really want you to watch this horror called The Descent about these female cavers that go underground and some shit happens. Oh my God. Female empowerment, really fun scares. And I think if you want to get into horror beyond The Nun and those franchise ones, I reckon it's going to be one for you. I texted you because my friend and I once watched Scream together, the newest Scream. We had planned to have like a scary movie night. We watched that. We're both really scared.

So it went horribly and we had to stop it multiple times. We took her dog out and when we were taking the dog out, we opened the door and there was a person there coming in and we just screamed in their face. Gave them a massive fright. We did. We did. And then we had to say, sorry, we were watching a scary movie. And anyway, so we decided we're going to do it again this season and watch something scary, and i asked for your advice yeah you know the

descent is what i would recommend there's another thing just that lift thing reminds me at that film festival i was talking about i was staying in a motel and every day i'd be in the lift ice machines everywhere by the way but i have a thing and i think it's because i'm i don't know what it is i think i'm tall yeah and maybe i'm a bit, but often when the lift door would open and someone would be waiting outside, they'd look up. I'd always give them a fright. Really? And it really got to my ego a bit because I'm like, when you let the door open and another human looks at you and they jump. Yeah, they're scared of you. Yeah, that happened to me quite a bit this week and it was really stunning

to get to me. Wow. And it's actually affected me now because every morning I go for like a walk, an early morning walk to get a coffee. And it's because I walk so fast, I'll sometimes overtake people. Right. And that can scare people sometimes. Well, of course.

When there's suddenly a big guy walking up. So I'm now crossing the road in advance if I'm having to walk past people. It's made me really scared of me being scary. Wait, that's very conscientious of you. And it's a ding, ding, ding to an episode of Synced. I really appreciate you because I was just saying, I want men to be a little more aware of their presence when they're around women or especially like one woman walking by themselves don't come up behind a small woman or any woman walking by herself and just come up behind and

walk around that's scary yeah 100 and the other thing that factors in in today's world is we've all got earpods in exactly so usually i'd whistle or like walk about so they sort of look and see that I'm approaching. Or like make a big stomping noise. Yeah. I've done that too. But that doesn't happen now because people are in the world. So you're the only option

because I have long legs and I just tend to like, you've seen me walk around the neighborhood. I look like, it's like, I'm just walking so fast. You're on a mission. Foot pods here are quite narrow. So yeah, I will just cross the street because there's nothing, again, there's nothing worse. It's like that lift thing.

There's nothing worse than walking past a woman and she like jumps. Yes. Because you clock the mentality that you're walking around with a lot of the time, which is I might get attacked. Which is a mindset I don't have because I'm big and tall. Yeah, and a man. And probably stupid. So I'm just not thinking about it. So yeah, I cross the road.

Yeah. Well, maybe at this film festival, people. So I'm just not thinking about it. So yeah, I crossed the road. Yeah. Well, maybe at this film festival, people had been in. It was a horror festival. Yes. Okay. They'd been watching scary stuff. But that doesn't make me feel better. I don't want people to look at me and jump.

I know. I know. I don't want people to look at me and smile or laugh. Laugh is not great either. I'd rather have a jump than a laugh. Yeah. See? No, people are just on edge because they've been watching scary stuff.

Okay. So don't take it personally. Also, two things. One, you just talked about walking fast. And on this trip to Universal, you noticed that I also walk fast. You gave me a compliment. It was great to walk with you. I'm so used to walking with people and I'm like, oh, God, hurry up.

Great walker. Great speed. speed yeah you commented on that and let's take a moment since we're talking about scary stuff to talk about your movie the reason you went to the film festival yeah yeah mr organ mr organ has been out for a little bit now it might still be at some theaters okay still playing yeah and it's funny because it's a documentary but it's played over the last couple of months in quite a few horror festivals, which is very funny. Because he's scary. He is scary. He's a real-life scary person.

But yeah, Mr. Organ, it's out in the world. So if you're in a city that has an Alamo or an indie theater, check it. It might be playing. Check it out, guys. Have a watch. Thanks, Monica. Yeah.

Yeah, we watched that a long time ago. We did. It's great. Yeah. It's scary. It is a bit scary. People are. Real life.

I always say this. Real life is always scarier than anything you could make up. Except Calvin as Chucky. That's the scariest. Vincent as Chucky. Oh. Imagine Vincent. Oh, okay.

Vincent as Chucky is a little better than Calvin as Chucky. Yeah, it was going to be Vincent as Chucky. Okay. Because he's that age. You're like, Calvin could be with a knife, could be an evil kid, right? He could get demented. I think Vincent's a little too young to get demented. That was my opinion.

Okay. We need to talk about Calvin. I think you still need to err on with caution. Have you ever been worried that Calvin, because this is real, like if you have kids, do you ever think, what if they're What if he goes bad? Yeah. Not with Calvin. He's like too sweet. He is friggin' sweet.

He really is. If all the kids, your kids are the ones that aren't gonna go nuts. Maybe Vincent. I don't know. We don't know yet. We don't know yet. Well, if you put him in Chucky, maybe he'll love it. Get excited. There's little shies are, ooh, yeah. I love this. Feeling this.

Oh, man. All right. Well, this was super fun. Happy Halloween. We did it. Field trips are really fun. And also, holidays, because they're markers. We've done this show, we know, for over a year because we had a Halloween episode last year.

Halloween part three next year, I'm really keen to go along to one of the hell houses where the super intense Christians put on these haunted houses through like what they fear. And that's a whole cultural thing that I really want to get into. Instead of Chucky, it's a room full of gays. It's so ridiculous. And I really want to go there and just figure out what is going on in their heads.

Yes. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's my goal. All right. Well, I hope everyone has a happy Halloween. Yeah, happy Halloween. Don't have any razor blades in the apples. Don't.

Eat all the candy. Eat all the candy. And don't lash out if a friend tries to, like, touch your shoulder to offer you help. Stick up for yourself. Bye. Bye.