Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard - Meghan Trainor

Episode Date: July 8, 2024

Meghan Trainor (Timeless) is a singer and songwriter. Meghan joins the Armchair Expert to discuss what it was like growing up on Nantucket Island, how she felt about the age gap between her parents, and having to move because of her allergies. Meghan and Dax talk about how she got into producing songs at a young age, why she loves the true crime genre, and song writing competitions. Meghan explains how she deals with negative comments on social media, how she has become more open about her medical conditions, and having dual toilets in her bathroom. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dax Randall Sheppard, I'm joined by Lily Padman. Hi. Good evening to you. Hello there. Good morning to you is what I meant. In reality, it's neither evening or morning. It's 2.43 in real life, I'm telling, I'm telling.

Which is 6.43 on the East Coast, so that would be a good evening. 5.43. What'd you just say? Oh, it's two. Yeah, I'm sorry. Oh my gosh. My fast math sucks today.

Yeah, you already tried a fast math that blundered. I did. It was a story that happened 2011. The person's currently 30 and I said 19. Of course, they're 17 at the time of the story. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'll be beating myself up all night over that. I hope you'll rest assured.

Today's guest is an award-winning singer and songwriter and television personality, Megan Trainor, Delta's very first favorite musician and song. She used to sing all about that bass, about that bass. No trouble. Yeah, she sure did. I love it. Her albums include Title, Thank You, Treat Myself,

A Very Trainer Christmas, Taking It Back, and a new album out now called Timeless. Check that out and please enjoy Meghan Trainor. Make your nights unforgettable with American Express. Unmissable show coming up? Good news, we've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it Meeting with friends before the show we can book your reservation and when you get to the main event

Skip to the good bit using the card member entrance Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express visit MXCA YMX benefits vary by card, other conditions apply. He's an armchair expert. He's an armchair expert. He's an armchair expert. Welcome! Hello! Thanks for coming. Strong hug. You're so fit. Are those the pants you wore to the concert?

No. Oh, they're also pink. They were much pinker. Oh, wow. These are salmon, no? Yeah, those are salmon. They're very Nantucket Reds. Oh.

I cannot wait to tell you about Nantucket. Look at your water bottle. Yeah, she blinged out. I love her. It was for my second Z section. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I cannot wait to tell you about Nantucket. Look at your water bottle. Yeah, she blinged out.

I love her. It was for my second C-section. Oh, wow. You wanted to ventize the C-section by having that by your side, or this was a reward for your C-section? Right. It was a gift.

I was like, here's for the hospital stay. And I got more compliments on this bejeweled water bottle than my baby. And who gave it to you? JoJo Siwa's mother. Oh my god! Wow! They bejewel everything. I'm really new to this whole Stanley thing.

Huge deal. Only because there's young people in my life do I even know about it, but I'm really behind the curve. So an item like this that's so bejeweled... This is an expensive item, no? What would you pay for that, Monica? I bet JoJo Siwa's mother bejeweled it herself. Yeah. Really?

Oh yeah, they don't sell them like this. Yeah, she did that. That must have taken an eternity. Six to seven weeks. Yeah. Oh my God. Almost as long as it took you to incubate the baby. Yeah, I usually have a gallon around with me because I took a gallon a day

or a half gallon if I'm feeling exhausted. But then quick trips like this, I was like, we need a smaller thing. So have you figured out how many of these Stanleys equals a gallon? Three? Like three, yeah. I'm on two right now.

Well you have to go potty a lot while we're here? I peed here. Oh you already did? He was like, I'll step out. I was like, don't need to. Oh my gosh. I was like, I don't make that much noise. I'm an open door canapere.

How long dating a boy before you feel comfortable with a two? With a two? Yeah. That took me a long time. A long time. Yeah, that's a while. It was in an accident.

It took him like a week. It took him a week. You guys are the worst. They are. Shaking your hand in party. We were velcro. Day one, I was like, you're never gonna leave me. Day six, I was like, we're in love.

Yeah. And then month one, I wrote our wedding song that we walked down the aisle to. Yeah, we're gross. I'm so jealous. Well, we're in love. And then month one, I wrote our wedding song that we walked down the aisle to. Yeah, we're gross. I'm so jealous. Well, and it's hopeful. It's hopeful, it's a real thing. But also, what I'm, I guess, proud of you of

is you felt all those ways within six days, but you did date for a couple years before you got married. We like stretched out as long as we could till a year and a half. Just for appearances. Yeah, just to make everyone else happy. I literally called my mom and was like, when can he propose where people won't judge us?

And she was like, give it another few months. And I was like, no. Okay, now for sure you'll be the first person I ever met that grew up on Nantucket. Really? Yes, and let me bring you up to speed. I had no idea what was happening in that whole region of the world,

but last summer we went on vacation to Martha's Vineyard, which is right down the coast. It's the other island. Is there a rivalry? Enemies, yeah. Really? Oh yeah. And the sports, oh my God.

Oh, that super competitive island sports league. We all lost. Yeah, I'm sure. Tell me what the Nantuckity people think about the Martha Vineyardy people. I was in Martha's Vineyard and I got to hear kind of their, they think Nantucket's very bougie now. So are they. Yeah, big time. Lady Gaga has a house there.

Okay, we're getting into it. They filmed Jaws there. But Jaws isn't bougie. But it's like, fiends. It's iconic. It's iconic. It is very iconic. The other Kennedy's. When people ask me where I'm from, I'm like, you ever seen Jaws?

That's where I'm from. And I clump it all together. And when we really don't know, I'm like Cape Cod potato chips. Oh, everyone knows that. You hit them with Cape Cod potato chips. Yeah, woods, pile, fairy, what is it? Woods, what's the fairy? Well, you come out of...

Oh, oh, oh. Woods Hole. Wood Hole? Ew, that sounds like a shaman. I don't even know what the fairy's called. We just call it the fairy. This is a difference. In Nantucket, they just call it the fairy.

In Martha's Vineyard, they call it Wood Hole. They know names. Wood Hole? Well, that's the name. Grey Lady, I think is what it's called. For the Nantucket fairy? Yeah it the fairy and Martha's Vineyard they call it Wood Hole. They have names, Wood Hole? Well that's the name. Grey Lady I think is what it's called. For the Nantucket fairy? Yeah something like that.

Okay. That's kind of cool. I think Robbie will tell me but it's called like Woods Hole or Woods Pile or Pile of Wood. That makes sense. Yeah. Okay so what did the Nantucket-y people say? And mind you it has evolved since you were born. I'm 30 now but they had more stuff than us.

They were bigger. So when we went to their schools to play but they had more stuff than us. They were bigger. So when we went to their schools to play games, they had nicer, better, bigger things. And I was like, we're on a tiny little island. There's less of us. We gotta be stronger together. Okay, so you had an underdog. Stomp your grapes.

Oh, that's so fancy to say, stomp your grapes. We were like, we're gonna make wine with you. Yeah. It's bad. Oh wow. Also the notion that those two places would have rivals is pretty adorable. It's like, aww, you too. We find a rival reason everywhere.

No one can just get along, even in Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard. I know, I've had people come up to me, they're like, I'm from Martha's Vineyard, so like, watch it. And I'm like, what? I got a zoo. I was like, sir. Oh, that's their way of trying to talk to you.

Yeah. But it has become way more expensive since you grew up there, no? Probably. I remember gas was like $6 when I last saw it. And the houses are quite nice. I don't think. I'm trying to get away from that side of the world so much

that I love these modern, chic houses in LA. I didn't know it was possible because growing up there, there's rules, you can't build a certain way. You have to have shingles. If you want a fence in the front, you have to ask permission. You can't paint your house. So the first time I came to California

and every house is different and opposite, I was like, ah, where am I? You could be unique over there. No matter how much money you throw into a big house, it's still gonna be old and spooky. And the wood shake exterior. Yeah, and I'm like, there are ghosts here. And that's so charming for us when we visit.

Yeah, you're like, aww. Yeah. I'm like, ew, it's moldy. Speaking of houses real quick, I've been to your old house. No, you haven't. Yeah. Julie Bowen's house? Yes.

Shut up. And it's gorgeous. Isn't that the most gorgeous house ever? It's so nice. I literally sobbed leaving that house. Why'd you leave it? Because I was having babies and my brothers lived with me at the time and there's two bedrooms down on that wing.

It was like the man cave wing and there was only one open bedroom right in the middle of them. And I was like, I don't want my baby crying in the middle of them and I don't want them waking him up and then I don't want to walk all the way and I didn't think it through.

So I was like, bigger, let's go. Okay. So you had both brothers, you're in the middle, right? You have an older and a younger? Yes, we're like a year apart. And they were living with you? Yes. And where did they go?

You said tough shit? Just recently, no, I have tried so hard to keep them with me. But really, it's so recent that like, I cried about it this morning. My younger brother found love, which is amazing. And she's the greatest girl ever. I have the best sister. And he lives with her now.

And they're engaged and trying to find a grown-up apartment and live lives. This is Justin. Justin. So Justin. You saying his name, he's gonna die. Okay, well they might not like this part. Oh no.

Oh, Dax. But he moved from one Gale's house, his sister into another Gale's? Yeah, yeah, yeah, something crazy. It's modern. Yeah, it's not impressive. No, damn. But he moved out of one Gale's house, his sister into another Gale's? Yeah, yeah, yeah, something crazy. It's modern. Yeah, it's not impressive. No, no. I clipped their wings.

My boys lived in my house, my place, my babies. These are my brothers. Your little babies. I clipped their wings, I said, you live comfy and be my friend, that's your only thing you have to do. Okay. My older brother lived in our back house and recently we're moving into a new home

that doesn't have a back house. So I was like, do you think I should buy this house? It's bigger and cooler, but there is no back house. You're in the house. And he was like, this is great. Then I bought it and he goes, listen, I thought about it. I don't want to be in the house. And I was like, you're breaking my heart.

You said to buy it because you would come with me and now you're not coming with me and I'm going to cry and I hate this. And then I found him a new apartment and I moved him in and everything and it's devastating, I see him way less. You're very maternal. Yeah, you really wanted to care for them. Yeah, I worry about them so much. And my husband's like, hey, we have kids now.

Right. So let's put that attention into them. Also, if I was your husband and I had to live with both your brothers, I don't know. So at first it was weird and then my husband's more in love with my brothers than me. Oh, okay We had a little something this morning

Ryan came in hot and was like I don't want to do all these things with you and then I left crying and my husband Went to him first and was like proud of you. That was good And then then he came up to me and rubbed my back and was like you're exactly right to feel how you feel and I was Like oh my god Came up to me and rubbed my back and was like, you're exactly right to feel how you feel. And I was like, you're a liar. I'm mad at him, I'm mad at him. And he just had therapy. He just had therapy. He just had therapy and I was like, how was it?

Did you learn something? And he was like, I just love you. And I was like, that's crazy, you didn't learn shit. Well, he's either quite generous at seeing everyone's point of view or he's playing both sides. Is he a Capricorn? No, I am.

He's a Gemini. Really bad. Really bad. He trusts no one. He thinks everyone's out to get us., I am. He's a Gemini. Really bad. Really bad. He trusts no one. Gemini's are bad? He thinks everyone's out to get us. But me too. He starts negative.

And I'm not a Gemini. But me too. I wonder if it's in your rising or your moon. Oh man, we have to find out. It might be. We need to look into it. That changes year to year, I assume? No.

It's your birth chart. It's on one chart, your birth chart. There's apps for it. Okay, but doesn't everyone have a different birth chart? Yeah. I'm just curious, if you're born in 75 January 2nd, do you have the same rising as you would if you were born in 84? No, because it depends on, you put your exact birthday, your time of birth to the minute

and location. That's what I thought. That could explain some stuff. Why did mom and dad find their way to Nantucket? They're jewelers? They were. My dad's had like seven lives. He was 43 when he started pushing us out

Oh, okay. This coffee is so fancy. I don't even know how to open it. I can't do it Have you ever had one you live here in LA? What is this called a cream top? It's a very perverted name. That's cream I'm gonna be pooping later Yeah, you will maybe even mid interview My parents it's a long, weird story, but a lot of people go to Nantucket to vacation there in the summer. Then they love it so much they end up staying year round.

So my dad was that guy. He was like a band teacher at one point. He was a lifeguard, a police officer. Not a legit one, but like a summer cop. He's had many lives. Is he from Boston? He's from Springfield, Mass. My mom was from Vermont and New Hampshire,

something like that. They're indistinguishable if you've been, sorry. Yeah, it's like the same place, right? Yeah, virtually. So my mom would summer there too, because her uncle lived there. Stay with me, it'll make sense. Her uncle was on Nantucket,

who was good friends with my soon to be father. Which is the age gap. Age gap, yeah. And they said, it's 20. Oh! I love this story. She was 19 when she would go to Nantucket, and he was born.

Oh! And they were like, keep her away from Gary, and she was like, who's Gary? Oh, your mom's dangerous. I always laugh, and I'm like, you her away from Gary. And she was like, who's Gary? I love you. Your mom's dangerous. I always laugh at her like, you little hoe. She was like, I didn't like anyone my age. I can relate. He had his life together.

And now he's 75. And she's 55. And it's starting to sink in. Is she starting to feel like a caretaker? He's so young and so like, I've got to be doing something at all times that he's on it. I hope he doesn't hear this. I don't think he should drive a car soon. He got hit by a car recently, just walking.

Oh, no. And that really took him 10 years back. These falls aren't good. These falls aren't good. And he loves to go on walks. And he loves nighttime walks. If he's on a bike, he won't wear a helmet because he's from the 20s.

Probably also a Capricorn. He's March, so no. But he is old school stubborn. Can't tell him what to do. How did they meet? This is an enormous age gap. Nowadays, this would be rough. Back then, we were like, we're rooting for you.

But they've been together for 30 years. Yeah. So her parents are only five years older than my dad. Oh! Oh my god. It was weird. Is your dad. Oh! What? Oh my God. Well yeah, the uncle's friend. Is your dad hot, be honest? No.

Really? He was just like, you know what it was? The dude is charming. Okay, that'll do it. Charisma is his middle name. He's a musician, he would sing at church and at weddings and he would host. He hosted the March of Dimes on TV on Nantucket. So I was like, my dad's a celebrity.

And I would sing there with him at like six. Yeah, it was great. So really quick, not to psychoanalyze mom. She loves this podcast so much. Yeah, she's sitting in the car right now. Oh, she is? Oh, I have to meet her before she goes. Why was Stability so appealing to her?

The dudes her age were all a mess. 19-year-old boys, ugh. Yeah, they're not great. She had a few boyfriends that she says they were cuckoo or they would cause a scene at her house and embarrass her when she broke up with them. She was a babe. Okay.

Baby babe. Smoke show. I was like, where did my boobs go? I didn't get any of your boobs. I always tell her I get dad's boobs. A lot of people have beefs with their mom about that. Yeah, I was like something happened and I have get dad's boobs. A lot of people have beefs with their mom about that. Yeah, I was like something happened and I have dad's boobs.

But wait, when you were younger and you're waiting to go through puberty, is your expectation we're gonna get those? Oh yeah, I was like if you're back tracked. So you might have had a little heightened expectation. These cones will turn into boobs. Yeah, you're just like waiting for any day now. My brothers would be like, hey, cone tits. Yeah, what was it like growing up with two boys?

I played football. I played baseball. My friends were the cheerleaders, and I was like, I'm on football. I was a big girl too, so at one point, I was center and my older brother, a year and five days older, was quarterback. You were literally on the football team? I was bent over.

Oh, no. Oh, careful, Stanley. Held up pretty good. It didn't spill too bad. If you don't know what center is, I'm bent over with the ball, about to hike it through my kitch to my older brother. And I was like, at one point, who's messing with us?

The coach's dad's friend. Why are we doing this? So it was an actual team. Oh, we were the Dolphins. In high school? No, this is third grade, fourth grade. This is Boys and Girls Club after school programs. Got it. I gotcha.

Okay, so you start singing at six at church. Very traditional place to start singing. Many of the singers we've interviewed started in church. Which concerns me as people start going to church, where will people start singing? My dad would have us go every Sunday and he was really cool and could sing, not great, but he was charming.

He knew it, really confident, really cool. He's a cool dude. When people would show up to church in the morning on time, he'd be like, come over here, we're gonna give them a song because they showed up on time. And so we would just, random pop-up shows. He knew I liked songwriting and wanted to be a better performer

and was like, well, you have to do it more, so I'm gonna throw you in there whenever I can. So he'd be like, Mother's Day is coming out, why don't you write me a song? He played the organ at the church? Organ and piano and keys, everything. He could play the big one too where he could step on the pedals.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And ever since I was really young, I would sit next to him and he'd be like, pull out the flute and I was like, no, okay, and like help him. All right, so this is a self-serving question because I was 38, so only five years younger than your dad. Do you say 43 when he started having kids?

Yeah. Were you conscious of him being an older dad? Not at first. At first he was the most fun dad and we would climb all over him and there's videos of us just attacking him and we didn't ever think of him as old until I got to kindergarten.

Him and my mom brought me to school and my friend was like, is that your grandpa? And we get that a lot. You don't look like a grandpa. You know what I mean? My dad was like, more grandpa-y than you. You look like a movie star. Oh, thank you.

And were you self-conscious of it? Yeah, I was like, no, that's my dad. I was upset. He was very stable when my mom met him. He has a good job. And they work at the jewelry store together. My mom especially looks really young. So this is exacerbated.

So when customers would come in, they'd go, oh honey, is your dad here? To her. Oh wow. Fuck. This is a unique story. I don't know, no one knows this part of me. Yeah, yeah, it's very unique.

And anyone who meets me and my mom, they're like, sisters. When they would walk in and see me and mom working at the jewelry store, they'd be like, girls, where's dad? Oh, wow. Oh, Christ. Like, that's her husband. Get real, that's my grandpa.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get confused about what's what. Now, in the end of the day, it's tiny, right? It's easy, easy. So I presume you guys know everyone at some point. It sucks to go get tampons. Yes, you know the boy working at the counter. Well, it's your friend's dad.

Oh, sure. I was like, hey, Dan, I slept over your house the other night. Yeah, just going to grab these heavy flow tampons? Yeah, I was like, there's got to be another way. Now, did you pine to be off of Nantucket? Yeah, it's also famous for people staying there. My dad was a band teacher and all the students that he taught there grew up and had children with him at the same time.

So all my friend's parents were like, your dad was my band teacher. And then it starts being like, whose cousins was that? You know? Very insular. And it's rough in the winter there, right? There's not much to do. So you do drugs and you drink and you hook up

and you do a lot of weird things at a really young age. 13, my brother started drinking and smoking. My town was tiny and there was nothing going on either. And several kids left junior high pregnant. That's better than mine, dude. Mine were suicides. Five. Five?

And the first one, they did a shrine on the wall because they didn't know what to do, so everyone started leaving notes. And then I think that inspired the other ones, like, well, that looks cool, I'm doing that. It is contagious. The head of some hospital in Boston came down to be like, we're going to switch things up

because this is not how you handle this. Right, so you basically got to ignore it and keep it quiet. Is that wild? Yeah, so we moved to Cape Cod. Is that what instigated the move? I was also allergic to this island. I was coughing a lot. I had this weird cough tick.

And I also found out I was allergic to certain molds. And these schools are just old and wet. I went to every doctor ever and they were like, are you getting bullied? And I was like, no, dude, I'm pretty popular. I just can't stop this cough. And then we did an allergy test and it was like certain grass, certain molds. And you just walk in those old buildings and you just see wet.

Yeah, it's a very damp climate. And did you have other tics? Yeah, when I was really young, I would hum at the table. Not a singing hum. I would take a sip and go, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. Oh, yeah. And I'd have to have an even number.

Same. I'm writing about it right now. I'm having so much fun. They're endless when I start remembering them. But did you do this one, Bree, and I both have so much fun. They're endless when I start remembering them. But did you do this one, Brie and I both had this in common as ticks where you have to check that you can go ah, ah, like you have to ah, check that you can make that noise, that very highest.

Yes, that. Up there? Yeah. You like needed to know that you could still make that noise. It would be overwhelming and you'd have to find it. Mine was, I still have it sometimes if my husband puts his big hand on this shoulder. I'm like, well then get this one. Aw, evenness. I gotta be even. If the radio station, when you turned up the volume,

it would always be like half and then a full bar. And if it was half, I was like, I'm going crazy. And my brothers would just mess with me. Or they would like scratch on the fabric of the roof and I was like, Please stop! And he was like, please stop. And he was like, yeah. You know? I had no idea what was going on.

Yeah, I had a thing with, anytime I had dry mud on my feet and then I'd be in the classroom that had that carpet, I would like almost pass out because I would rub the dryness on that carpet and it would give me heebie-jeebies until I'd have to go to the drinking fountain and make everything wet.

Oh my God. Wait, you made your feet wet? I would have to go to the drinking fountain and make everything wet. Oh my God. Wait, you made your feet wet? I would have to like wet my fingertips and there's just so much dryness on my feet and on the carpet that I had to find moisture. Poor thing. I was like so busy. Were you busy all day with the different things?

I was exhausted. I've always my whole life picked my skin off my fingers. We were just talking about this. Do you ever eat it? No, I don't swallow it. But you chew on it, right? I gather a pile. Okay.

We just got into a whole debate because I had a peel and I peeled this little piece off and for a second I was like, I want to chew on this. I didn't do it. But you wanted to. I really wanted to.

Were you like, God, it looks yummy? No. You want to feel the texture. So what about the texture? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My thing was when you bite a calisop and then you just feel it in your teeth. If I couldn't get my fingers, I go to my mouth

and I get my lips. I always get my lips. Oh man, I could cause damage. Like craters in there. I just look crazy, like I'm on drugs. Do you think that was a genetic disposition? I hope so. Nothing crazy happened to me at childhood

that I'm like, that tracks. Reading about you, it seems like you had the most idyllic, supportive, lovely family. We had a great family. There's always family stuff, but yeah. Yeah, of course. But the fact that you start singing at six, you start performing with your dad

and your aunt and your brother. You're in a cover band by the time you're 12. This sounds so cute and dreamy. It was cute. Walk me through it, I don't want to jump to it. But at six you started singing, what age does Garage Band enter your life? I was young.

When Mac was making computers again and they were like, this is cool, and now we're doing silver, that world. And my dad, it was a big purchase, I think it was my birthday, and he let me know this is a big deal. But he also let me know that he had a credit card and was like, anything I buy in here you could pay me

Back someday when you make money for music, and I was like fuck you Maybe I should be saving receipts I use for Megan they will be paid back and I did but yeah, he got me a Macintosh He also was like Dell guy all the way so he had to break his religion He's like I don't know how to use this. I cannot help you. But you figure it out. There's something called GarageBand on here

and you can make beats. Cause I was trying to do it on the Dell computers. And I was like, this sucks. But then I learned it right away. I would show him as a thank you for buying this. I wrote a song for you. And then it turned into every day, I was writing a new song.

So what kind of kid were you? You said you were popular. My older brother was popular. So by default, I got I was writing a new song. So what kind of kid were you? You said you were popular. My older brother was popular, so by default I got to be there a little bit. I was trainer sis all throughout middle school and high school. They called him trainer. Yeah, he's trainer and I was trainer sis.

And then Justin, how did he fit in? J-Train. J-Train. What a dumb question. They loved him because he was a freshman while Ryan was a very popular senior. And at a junior we became more friends. Finally, my older brother and I.

Because you wanted to be his best friend. So bad. I just followed him everywhere and he was like, get away from me. And now we're best friends, but it took so long. I just had to be a pop star. At that point in high school, we brought Justin to every high school party and we would roll in the three of us like, the trainers are here. Oh wow, this is ideal.

It was sick. We had a garage with a cold attic above it and we would have little parties up there. Me and my brothers would make eye contact and be like, are you over this? And he's like, I'm over this. And we'd be like, one, two, three. Everybody get out.

Oh, okay, you were really running the show. Ran the show, yeah. This is the dream. It is, if I was was your parents I'd be so pleased by this my kids all get along And was Justin trying to hook up with your friends and you were trying to hook up with Ryan's friends I'm trying to go with Ryan's friends, but none of them would betray him like that quote unquote I was like am I a monster why won't you look at me? They're like I would never do that to Ryan and I was like am I a monster why won't you look at me? They're like I would never do that to Ryan and I was like you're a loser Vi,

but he would hook up with all my friends. And I was like that's fine I guess. Yeah that's not fair. And was Justin gobbling up any scraps? No he was sweet and shy and insecure. Okay I like him. He's a sweetie. He found love.

He found love. It's gonna be hard for Ryan he's had too many options. So Ryan I wanted to ask if this is like an addict thing, cause he's sober now for three years. Oh wonderful. Oh yeah, yeah, he went crazy. He had to, he was too cool in high school. But he was extra cool out here too.

He was like my brother out here, and all the parties that I was invited to, I never went and was like, Ryan, go for me. And he was great at it, I never had to worry about him ever. But then we saw it was a problem, when he fell on his face and started bleeding and almost died like that He came out with a black eye and thought I almost died in my bathroom like this like this is my wake-up call He was so afraid and then was like him done went cold turkey, which is very dangerous with the amount He was drinking he could have had seizures and stuff and he didn't he did great

So he's on his third year now. And he's doing wonderful. And I forgot my question about it. Oh, he's only had like one girlfriend and he's very attractive, very charming, awesome guy. Everyone would be shocked to hear he only had one girlfriend his whole life and it was in high school. He's had flings, but it never lasts.

Or if a girl is immediately interested in him, he's like, I'm bored. What's that? He's always been a stud, everyone likes him. It's not hard for people to fall in love with him fast. And also, if you go out to your garage and you have like 10 super cars. He does not.

Well, no, I know. But I'm saying the odds of you committing to one of the super cars and only driving that super car when there are 10 there, that's a unique person that's gonna make that decision. Not that we should ever feel bad for gorgeous, popular guys, but I think it's harder for them to make that decision.

Does he want to have a family? For a long time, especially being sober, he's like, I need to figure this out, I need to figure me out. But now at three years, I put so much pressure on him. We'll meet a nice new lady and I'll be like, hey, you could be my sister. Do you think my brother's cute?

Do you like it? I'm aggressive and I know I need to pull back and stop. But I have the best love with my husband and he's my best friend and I couldn't live without him. I don't like pooping without him. I don't like peeing without him. I don't want to shower unless he's close. I'm codependent and I'm fine with that.

And I want my brother to find that happiness. That same codependency. Yeah. And now he truly lives on his own. And I'm like, I know he's alone. Elsie, you're gonna find the best person. Where are they? So loneliness scares you.

Loneliness scares me. Death scares me more. I hate death. I'm watching Six Feet Under right now. I wouldn't recommend. I love it. I watch Dateline every night. I listen to Dateline fall asleep.

I think people that are most fearful of death are really drawn. I cannot get enough of it. I think I'm gonna solve a crime one day. Do you listen to the murder podcast and stuff? Yeah, all of them, yes. All of them, yeah. I love it.

They need to have a good voice, though. And Keith Morrison is the best. Oh, I love Keith. I'm like, it's a lullaby. Are you singing to the choir right now? Singing in the choir? Singing to the choir? Preaching to the choir.

Preaching to the choir. I was like, shall I sing? Yes. Shall I sing? This is the answer. To promo, my whole album, Timeless, is about my big fear of death, but I turned it into a love song.

Don't worry, it's not like a big album of sad. I wrote this song called Timeless, I think you will love it. It starts with nothing's forever, that's what I'm told, and it doesn't make any sense to me. All these memories we make, where do they go? It can't just be poof gone. Is that an archway into spirituality?

I don't know what I believe in. I'm so confused and lost. I wish I could see a ghost so that I know I could at least haunt my kids forever. I tried, know what I believe in. I'm so confused and lost. I wish I could see a ghost so that I know I could at least haunt my kids forever. I tried, I went to a haunted mansion, I saw nothing. And I was like. I haven't seen any either. I accept that other people do, but I personally haven't.

I've seen videos and I'm like, I believe that, that's sick. But like, show it in person. I want to see a body in front of me that was here and is not. Because I can't find purchase in a belief in a God. Same. But I was listening to this book for the second time, A Brief History of Intelligence, great book, recommend it.

It's talking about the period in evolution where fish crawled out of the water and started eating vegetation close to the water line and develop lungs, ultimately becomes mammals, right? And my understanding of evolution Which is there's a mutation then that mutations beneficial and then they breed more and that's how the thing lasts Lungs is so complicated. How the fuck could that be a mutation? Are we saying one fish one of these days had a set of lungs and all of a sudden I was like

I don't think I buy this even though I'm the biggest proponent of science, I'm like, that's way too complicated of a mutation. Maybe it was like 100 million years. Well, it was. Think about the steps that led to the lungs. Even if you have a kabillion year timeline, for them to evolve one cell at a time, one mutation at a time, it's so complex and opposite of the previous system.

I was a little bit like, wow, do I believe this? Oh, God. I mean, like, think about when your wife, he was pregnant, and how there was nothing in there, and then there was lungs. Exactly. In a matter of months. But it had DNA.

Or a sesame seed. Telling it how to build those lungs. I don't know, that's deep. I can't help you with that. To go from gills to lungs sounds like quite a mutation. So you think when we die, it's like black and that's it? I do. Oh fuck.

You too? I want to not. Right, we'd all like to not. I do think that, but just last night thinking about the lungs was like, I don't know man, that's quite a mutation. So that means then you believe it is divine? I don't jump to I know what it is, but I did have a moment where I was like,

that's a little hard for me to believe. In the way this has been explained and we all accept it, I find it a little hard to believe that lungs could be a mutation. Do you believe aliens are running this? No. Damn. I believe in aliens, but I don't think

they've ever been here. They didn't make us. Right, they're too far away. They're not running the sim. Yeah. We're not their pets. Okay, back to your life. Sorry about the fish thing.

Really, last night I was just like, this is bullshit. No, I'm gonna ask my whole family. My uncle's very into that, so I'm gonna ask him. Okay, and it's a great book, I recommend it. But just, lungs is a mutation. Anyways, moving on. You write your first song at 12.

Here's what I knew about you. And I think you already know this because you've run into Kristin a few times in real life. Once, and it was the best day of my life. Okay, just once. Is that an award show? It was at James Corden backstage. I got to hold her. Okay, great. Oh Is that an award show? It was at James Corden backstage. I got to hold her.

Okay, great. Oh, that's nice. She's very holdable. She is. And at that time, she was two or three. Delta's first song she ever sang compulsively was All About That Bass. You stop it.

And she would say, do you remember this, Monica? She would go, all about that bass. No, twubble. Oh yeah. She thought it was trouble and she mispronounced it to trouble invite me over I'm pretty sure she told you that when you guys met because I think she came home she's like oh my god I met Megan trainer and I got to tell her that Delta sings all about that bass no trouble we own the

CD you own the CD you know you could mail in and you could get a little thing from you that was written and an actual physical CD. Delta demanded we get her this CD at like three years old. I was sent it to you. But we're like, honey, we have nowhere to play this. She didn't care. And she has the CD, but she doesn't know what she's gonna do with it.

We have an 11-year-old too, and I'm trying to imagine her committing daily to writing songs. And making beats. I didn't know your story started so young until today. Even though I was fully aware of you and thanked you from afar for this gift of Delta St. Wubble,

I didn't realize you were like fucking 12 and 15 and in bands and writing tons of songs by the time you were 17. My dad was very musical, so there was a piano in the house and he's been playing since he was 11. And then he was a band teacher, so he learned other instruments.

He had this weird thing where he refused to teach me because he was a teacher for so long and he said he didn't want to fight with me. Do you think you would have been able to take instruction from him? I was desperate for it. And then one day he taught me the circle of fifths and I was like, this is fucking lame.

Just teach me chords. And then he did. Wait, do you say the cycle of? Circle of fifths. I thought you were making a joke about Dax's fish story. Oh, no, no, no. It's lame. I thought you were doing a callback to the fish. He showed me, he's like, I'll give you the basics

and that's it. I'm not going to teach you anything else. You have to learn by ear. And that's what I did. So he showed me what a chord is. And then I just sat there forever. I've never loved something so much. So I was like, I will figure this out.

One day I found a guitar that was like an old guitar he never played, deep in the closet. And I was like, what's this? He's like, it's a guitar. I don't really know how to play, but I could show you three chords. So he showed me the three chords. I learned a whole song. My first song was from Jaws when they're drunk in the boat. And it was, show me the way to go home. Boom, boom. I'm tired and I want to go to bed you know that one no but I love that we'll go about an hour ago and it went straight to my head that's what I did with a guitar that's lovely two things are happening I was like excited

and I recognized the song and then I literally went that movie is so much bigger in Nantucket And you imagine Martha's Vineyard also It's the reason I won't go in the ocean so it ruined my life But I don't think most people know the song from Jaws So he might not have taught you but crazy supportive because he built like a little recording studio I just was so persistent that hours later. I was like dad. Look I learned a whole song and he was like, holy crap I remember in high school. He got me a ukulele.

And he's like, I don't know how to play this either, but I'm sure you can figure it out. And then I wrote a whole lullaby that day as like my thank you and would write him songs all the time. As I would write more, I'd get better and I would produce more and I'd get better with my production. And then eventually I was going to start traveling to do songwriting and we bought the equipment

that I could set up in a hotel room and work anywhere. He was like, I don't want you to have to rely on anyone. But the training was tough. He would have all the wires laid out on the ground, random, and he would go, put it together. Oh, wow. And I was like, duh.

Do it for me. Help me. And he was like, no, dude, when you land in LA and you're by yourself, you got to figure this out. And then I set it all up, and I was like, it works. And he's like, no, write a song. And then I set it all up and I was like, it works. He's like, no, write a song. And then in high school when I was like a beast at it,

after school every day, I would go home, write a song, and play it by dinnertime for all of them. Every day. My dad's like, you're not really great at something until you've done it 500 times. Been writing 10,000 songs. And so I was trying to get my hours in. He's a big part of this story.

Yeah, he's a big part of this. But I bought him a house and was like, we good? Yeah, do you feel like you owe him? Yeah, I got a job in Australia to do Australian Idol. And half of my paycheck, I was like, I'm bringing the whole fam and my dad. He's never been. He's 75.

We're going to live in Australia. So that's how I try to pay him back. This is my dream. Your daughters are going to pay you to go to Australia. I'm willing to buy my own ticket. but if they want me there while they're doing something like that is the dream. It was sick. Stay tuned for more of Farmature Expert, if you dare. Between 15 and 17, you wrote three albums and produced them yourself.

So embarrassing. Because of songs, I'm like, oh my God, I hope no one hears that. Well, that was going to be one of my questions. What on earth are you writing about at that age? So much love. You just were desperate to be in love. My mom's like, who are you? Anyone who didn't like me.

The first one, I didn't know what love was, and then the third album, I went through my first heartbreak, and then that album that I wrote and produced, I got a publishing deal because of it. So I was like, this is my Adele album, fuck you, I win. Yeah. This would be my guess, is that you would present very boy-friendly because of the brothers,

and then it would turn out that you are a girl with emotions and the boy would be like, hold on. He would present as male. I thought you were a bro with boobs. Also when I got quote unquote famous and started looking way prettier than I did, I got fake hair, I got makeup, I've never been prettier, I'm gonna find love.

And then I would go out with my bro and no one would approach me, no one would speak to me. And then we'd go out with my bro and no one would approach me. No one would speak to me. And then we'd go home and eat pizza. This is post. Right after base where I'm like, oh my God, guys are gonna line up for me. No one look at me.

How do you explain that? I asked my bro. I was like, dude, do I give off mean vibes? Am I a monster? And he was like, no, dude, you just take over a whole room. And sometimes that's intimidating for weak guys. And Darryl was the first guy that was so brave.

We were hanging out, he was playing piano, singing terribly, Coldplay. And I was like, Jesus Christ, who is this guy? Why is he singing to me right now? The ball's on this man. That is ballsy. But he was really swinging for the fences, playing Coldplay. There's a sky full of stars, you know? And I was like, what are you doing? He the fences. Playing Coldplay. There's a sky full of stars.

And I was like, what are you doing? He lives and dies for Coldplay. That's number one and then I'm number two. That's a good pick. Well, it sounds like Coldplay is number one. Ryan's number two. You're number three. Literally.

In the previous story. No, Darryl is in love with my brother. Okay, so you're also kind of hungry to learn. So you are doing it in high school. You're receiving some instruction. But then you're also going to these camps through Berkeley in the summer. You Wikipedia me, dude.

How do you know this? You have an excessively long Wikipedia by chance. Oh my god. I tried to whip up a theory. It's not real. Yes, I did go to summer camp. I went to band camp at Berkeley College of Music because I was trying to get into their college.

So I heard if you go there for three years, you get kind of a discount when you go in, or you automatically get in. I did two years, and then I got the third year for free or something, so I was like doing good. And then I got into the school, but I got 20 grand off or something out of 60 grand a year. And I was like, well, that stings.

And that would have been to go to college there? Yeah, college. And at the same time, I signed a publishing deal already. But you go to Nashville for a music convention. Even weird, I went to Durango, Colorado. Oh Durango, okay I've been. And they did a songwriting expo, but all the publishers I met were from Nashville.

So right, this is the part that I'm very curious about because I know how it works in acting, but I'm curious if you're in Nantucket and you wanna be a songwriter and you're going to band camp in the summer, what are these expos? My mom was Googling everything. She was signing me up for all these songwriting competitions online, like on Taxi.com or something,

and was like, you won! And I was like, what did I win? And they were like, the front page of their website. I'm like, hell yeah! She was just trying to prove to herself, I'm not just like a mama who loves my baby so much. There's good here. And so they looked up songwriting places

where you could go and submit your song, and that's what these expos were. And they were terrifying. Yeah, how do they work? Hundreds of people walking around in this hotel, you're lost, I'm like, I've never seen this many people in my life. You feel stupid, right?

Stupid, yeah. My dad was with me. We would go into separate ballrooms with a lot of chairs and then four dudes up at a table with a shitty boombox ready to play your CD. Oh wow. And you would walk up when it was your turn, hand in the lyrics, hand in the CD,

and be like, it's track seven, and then sit while the entire room watches you get judged. They listen to the song, you don't perform it. They listen to the song while you're sitting there. While you're sitting there. I was so nervous that I wrote on top of it, I'm 17, I produced it in my basement, trying to be like, yo, go easy on me, dude, please.

Yeah, yeah, setting the bar low. Anyone could sign up if you paid like 300 bucks to go. There was some songwriters there that were like, oh no, this is tough to listen to. Or like 50 year old men that were like, this is my dying dream, and you're like, it shouldn't be. It's gonna be me next year. How many folks were your age?

There was a few of us and it was us with our parents. But I remember the first year I went, they were like, your lyrics don't really make sense, but your melodies are really great and your production is great. And I was like, well, that tracks, I'm 16. That was good advice, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they were nice,

but you're just so afraid. And then my dad's like, we're going again. And I was like, I don't want to go again, dude. All they do is rip apart your songs, make you feel bad. And he was like, but you wrote a so afraid. And then my dad's like, we're going again. And I was like, I don't want to go again, dude. All they do is rip apart your songs and make you feel bad. And he was like, but you wrote a whole new album since then and it is way better. We have to go show them what you learned. And that was the album I got my publishing deal from.

It's hard not to love dad. I love dad. I love dad. I'm interested in what dad's doing. Cause he was like, I'm not going to teach you. I'm keeping sort of arm's length, but also very much not. It sounds like he had the perfect distance. Yeah, they've never been my managers or my momagers.

They've never been like, do this or else. I never felt guilty if I lost something. But like he stepped into the moment that you needed to be told to give it another shot, which is interesting. And so when I went there the next time, there was talk, oh man, Megan's gonna get the deal this time,

because someone's gonna get a publishing deal out of that, but it's rare. It's like, if you get it, you are the queen. Yeah, well, it's these stories of these casting workshops where someone really does. It never happens. It never happens. But we were just interviewing.

Oh, Eric Dane from Grey's Anatomy. He had gone with Alicia Silverstone. Yes, he had some success. I can't believe they do that for acting. I didn't know that. How are you going to get in front of a casting director if you don't have an agent? How are you going to get in front of an agent? Normally it's a scam. A lot of it's a racket.

I mean, yeah, I felt like I was at a place that was a scam, but it worked. And then at the end of the convention, they have legendary songwriters go up and perform. And I told my dad the the convention, they have legendary songwriters go up and perform. And I told my dad the second time, I was like, Dad, my goal is to be on that stage someday and come back and play. One of the songwriters there, Big Al, Al Anderson, and another writer who was really great named Chris Galbuta, who's now my best buddy. They were friends hanging out, hearing my songs, and they were just so impressed with

my album that I wrote. How old were they? Big Al was an old dude, like 60. And then Chris was a young but old at heart dude. That was like 30, I want to say, 35. They wanted to write with me, and I was like, I'm going to shit myself. This is the coolest day ever.

And we wrote a song called Can't Blame a Girl for Trying. And it was the cutest song on my ukulele. And Al said, we're going to sing that at the last performance. And I was like, on the big stage? And he was like, mm-hmm. I, and Al said, we're going to sing that at the last performance. And I was like, on the big stage? And he was like, mm-hmm. I was like, dad, I'm going to be performing on the big stage at the end of the convention?

And he was like, what? And I was like, uh-huh. And then we did it. It was so new that I had the lyrics on my phone on my lap, and it's probably on YouTube somewhere. A guy that worked with Disney was there and came up to me after and was like, hi, I'm gonna get that song cut.

That was wonderful. And I was just like sobbing, crying, calling my mom like, I was on the big stage. And everyone said I was awesome. And then Sabrina Carpenter eventually cut that song. No way. At Hollywood Records. The same song you wrote at this weird convention.

What? Oh my God. I'm a fairy tale and this weird convention. What? Oh my god. I'm a fairy tale and I'm a princess. Queen of the World, wow. It was a movie. Was this big yellow dog music that signed you? Yeah, I was like 17. They're like, we really want to wait till you're 18.

You graduated in the same year. This is 2012. Yes, I graduated then, but in high school, I left at lunchtime with my dad to go sign my publishing deal. I went back and was like, I got a job! And my friends were like, whatever. And so what did that look like?

I know you graduated and then you spent a couple years you were traveling to like New York and LA and Nashville to write with people. At that time, and even when you went to the convention, were you wanting to be a performer or just a writer? Big yellow dog, this girl Carla, she signed me. When I first went to go sing for them, she was like, well, you should be the singer. Yeah, that's like an end goal dream. So you were being conservative.

I'm just trying to get my way into there. My dad, he was brutally honest too. That's like his other thing. So he was like, I'm reading this article about LA Read and he says you have to have the look. I don't know if you got the look yet, but one day I was like, dad, don't worry about it. I'm gonna get in with my songwriting. People will be like, that's that big songwriter. And then at like 26, I'll be like, this is me, check it out. You did have the goal. It's just at that time you were like,

I'm happy to just be writing songs. I was like, any way to get in. And I didn't know you could make a living off of being a songwriter. And I was like, what a treat. What did that look like? You wake up at 11 and you show up to the session at noon. It was a dream job for a 19-year-old.

And you write a song with other songwriters, just trying to make it. So you don't get really paid to go to work. You show up and you write a song and you hope something happens. And then you make a demo of it. And then if someone had come to Big Yellow Dog Music in search of a song, they would listen to these. Other record labels would come to publishers

and be like, hey, do you have a song that's like, Poppy is about this? I wrote all about that bass a year in with this publishing deal, and for nine months nobody would cut it. Listen, I stumble into a lot of bad blood and stuff because I'm not super dialed in, but you meet somebody along the way though, right?

You meet Kevin. Kevin Kadesh. We're still good with Kevin? Yeah, wait, what do you mean you're stumbling in? A lot of these early stories when people, I don't know if at this point there's been a big Falling out. Falling out, or has anyone sued anyone?

Cause that happens a lot. No one sued anyone. We don't talk anymore, but it was wild. I was like 19 and he was a dad. You just got assigned to write with him? My friend was signed as an artist and she was working with him. And my publisher was like,

you gotta meet this pop star that we're gonna go see. We're gonna go say hi. And we became best friends. But I was also like, oh, this is the guy that wrote Geek in the Pink and a bunch of hits. I liked what he did. And so then you guys started working together. Well, I asked, could I work with him?

And at first I think he said no. And then someone convinced him to let me go there and write with him and that I would be better. And the first song we wrote together was all about that bass. Where did it happen? His studio's like a barn outside. There's like a hundred cows. In Nashville? Yeah. I drove like 45 minutes to get there.

He was like the highest producer songwriter I've written with. I was so nervous and I was just trying to impress him. And then we chatted, you know, who are you? And I was like, I was a chubby kid from Nantel Kid. And he was like, I was a chubby kid. And we bonded over that. He showed me a title that he had, All Bass, No Treble. And I was like, the kids, we say like,

y'all, I'm all about that. And we made it like, I'm all about that bass, no treble. And I was like, what if it's bass, your butt, and no tits, no treble. Oh, did you know that? I didn't know that. No one knows that. It's stupid. Bass is like thick, thick, thick, and treble is like so nice and thin. I love that.

Yeah. So then we wrote that song in like 45 minutes and we were laughing because we were like, no one's going to sing this. But I was like, I'll sing the demo. Like whatever. And there was like no auto-tuneune I just put on this sassy girl character Yeah, and I was like, I don't know if you know this but I can also rap and I was like, yeah It's pretty clear. I know size two. No one remembers that I rapped on that time Which now I'm like that's embarrassing. It's not though. I remember leaving the door being like do you like it? And he's like, yeah, do you like it? I was like, yeah, I think so. Yeah, I think it's good. You probably had written other songs

that you liked much more. That I was like, oh, these are beautiful. These are great big pop songs. And then when I heard that Epic Records loved that song, I was like, do they mean a different song or do they mean that song? But there were some steps before anyone loved it, right? At first you were trying to get other artists

to want to buy it. My publishers were. And I remember playing it for like an A&R at one point and he was like, oh, you're chubby and confident and you think that's a thing? That's cute, but it's not like a hit song. And then later on when I had a record deal for it, all those guys came back and was like,

yo, F you for not signing with me. And I was like, I played you that song. You said it was trash. Right. So people didn't like it, but also in that period, you write the song in 2012, I guess, but then it gets put out in 2013., you write the song in 2012 I guess, but then it gets put out in 2013. You had songs that got bought I guess,

or sang by Hunter Hayes, Rascal Flatts. Hunter didn't release a song, but we wrote together. What about Rascal Flatts? Rascal Flatts added number one with them. Wow. Which is 19. So in your 19? Like 19.

Do you get paid a lot? I don't know what I made on those songs. You don't? That's my other issue in life, and I've said this before, I don't know what money I have. I have no idea. Okay, that sounds liberating. I don't know if I want to know, but I should know. And they tell me, we have meetings about it.

Or they say if you're in trouble. You glaze over. I have my mom there, my dad there, my other manager there, my husband there, and I go talk to me like I'm six, dude. I don't get it. I know, it's confusing. Can I buy shit or not? Literally, I was like,

am I good with this Amazon purchase or no? And they're like, yes Megan, you're fine. But I know you don't get paid for like nine months, at least. So when bass was huge, everyone's like, how rich are you? I was like, broke. You were trying to sell it and it got rejected mostly, but then is this apocryphal or real?

You performed it in front of LA Reid. Yes, he loved the song. I lived in Nashville. Carla was like, girl, they want to meet you. And I was like, what do you mean? She's like, just get over here and sing some songs. And so I met an A&R named Paul Panias who was working with L.A. Reid.

He said, do you perform for the people? I was like, not all the time, but I have and I can figure it out. And I played in front of him some of my ukulele songs, but I didn't play bass. He's like, could you play bass? I was like, I could probably learn it. I don't like sing and dance with tracks and stuff. I don't have that down. So he was like, play it on ukulele

when you come to LA sometime. And then a week later, I went to LA for a songwriting trip and I texted him like, yo, I'm here. And he was like, can you play for LA tomorrow? And I was like, oh shit. What's your anxiety level when you get an opportunity like that? I was so scared, dude. I was up till midnight shit. What's your anxiety level when you get an opportunity like that? I was so scared, dude.

I was up till midnight learning it's three chords. Eating the skin on your fingers and clearing your throat. I played the ukulele and I learned the song. It was three chords. I learned it that night and I sent a voice memo to my parents. I said, I know you're sleeping, but please wake up. I need you to tell me this is good or not. And they're like, it sounds great.

Just don't forget to smile. And I was like, OK. I can't imagine that song on a ukulele. Oh, it's so cute. I put it everywhere on the uke. Oh, you do? Yeah, I have a uke right now that Coldplay signed, no big deal. Oh, ding ding ding, Coldplay. Wait a minute, can we get some context for LA Reid

for those of us in the dark? He ran Epic Records, but he also signed everyone ever. Humongous. Hank, Avril Lavigne, Usher. He's like a Jimmy Iovine level. Yeah, he's one of those. He was very supportive and good to me and always listened to me. He was like, I only trust the artist.

I was like, shouldn't do that, but okay. I went into the office to go play for him and I waited hours. And I was like, I want to fucking pute, like, wrap this up, dude, where is he? And they're like, he's almost done in a meeting. And I was like, I wanna fucking puke. Like, wrap this up dude, where is he? And they're like, he's almost done in a meeting. And I heard rumors, everyone's like, heads up, he brings everyone in the building to come watch. What? I just sat practicing in Paul's office for hours.

Were your armpits completely sweated out by the time? Yeah, I put a jacket on for that reason. I like dressed for this. Yeah, I would have been so damp. So damp, so scared. And then finally he came in, but he only brought four people in. And I said, is this everyone? And he goes, oh, you want a crowd? One second.

Oh! And then he got everyone. But you didn't want a crowd. No, I was like, shut your mouth! You don't! I was like, if you say another word. So I did that to myself, lesson learned. And then they all came in and they're all crossing their arms. Ah!

My name is Megan Trainor, and I'm a singer-songwriter and this is my song all about that bass. I'm from Nantucket. I'm a singer from Nantucket, here I go. And then I sang it, I messed up some chords and then LA and I locked eyes and he was like, shoo, bop, bop, shoo, like singing my backgrounds for me and I was like, well he's digging it,

I'll just stare at him. And he signed you 30 minutes later. Well they stuck me in a room of all white with no phone, no nothing, with my thoughts. They played all about the bass song over and over again. My theory is he's like, don't worry about her. We can fix this. Listen to this.

Because they played it maybe eight times. And I'm sitting there like, oh my God, oh my God. You can't hear them listening to you? Oh yeah. Oh, you can. And then finally a sweet girl came in and goes, do you want some water? I was like, please, you can. And then finally, a sweet girl came in and goes, do you want some water? I was like, please get my phone.

And she brought me my phone. Because I thought I was like a prisoner in there. I don't know why I didn't move. Yeah, this is like... And then I texted all my family. I fucked up. I failed. I messed up a chord.

I'm not getting a record deal. And then Paul Pontius walks back to me and is like, we got you a record deal. And I was like, are you sure? And he's record, dude. And I was like, are you sure? And he's like, yeah. And I was like, all right. Oh my God. And then you, I presume, re-recorded it.

Everything everyone hears is my raw demo. The song never changed. That is mixed by Kevin Kadesh. In his barn. From his barn. They said master that. I said, wait a second. Holy shit. Wow. Wouldn't that mean that you and Kevin

owned the master and the publishing? No, at that time I had zero publishing. Okay. That's a whole nother story. Then you had the master, is that what you got paid on? How did that work? I don't think I have it, I think Epic Records has it. Okay, because it sold 11 million copies when it came out.

Now I have publishing for it, but I had to renegotiate my publishing deal because they signed me with no cuts no nothing so they were like we're not gonna give you everything so I signed a regular deal for a baby girl songwriter that and then I was like hey we should talk I have a number one song right now and then I gave them five more albums for a normal publishing percentage. This world is a bit fucked, as we know from Taylor. At any rate, because I had a fantasy that you're struggling, you're flying all around,

you can barely afford to live in Nashville, you write this song, it comes out it sells 11 million copies, I'm thinking that you go from probably zero dollars in your bank account to like three million dollars in an afternoon. No, and it takes nine months, so I was at Park La Brea with my older brother. Oh my God, for people who don't know about Park, they've heard us.

Laugh, girl, laugh. I love it. They've heard us talk about. Oakwood. Oakwood, which is where young actors go. It's another one, yeah. That's nicer than Park, I think. I don't know, I always dreamt of living at Park La Brea.

It seemed fancy. When I first moved. There was like throw up in the elevator a lot for me, and I was like, why, babes? Why couldn't we clean this up? Yikes. Crazy smells, crazy noises. Because that too houses a lot of people here temporarily to pursue their dream. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My mom was helping us. I was paying one grand and she was paying another. Well, that brings us to the success of that song, I'm sure, is one of the more unique experiences of anyone's life. She's my Macarena. Yeah, she is. And just the total anonymity to... It was number one in 58 countries.

Yeah, unheard of. So like a kind of global overnight... We'll never do it again. You know? Well, it is kind of like Pulp Fiction where it's like awesome and also, oh boy, we set the bar real high out of the gate. But I think within that enormous success, and you won Grammy Best New Artist of the Year,

this thing is a juggernaut, it's number one for weeks and weeks and weeks. I think it brought some haters out of the woodwork. Yeah, the more successful you get, the louder the hate can get. What I was reading, I thought, well, you were dealing with quite a lot of stuff at 20 years old.

Is that on my wicca? I just got some hate of the song lyrics. This one seems kind of ironic, which is your body shaming skinny girls. Skinny girls, we gotta give a pass here. Wait, what? Yeah, cause I said, go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that... that part. People were mad about that. They're so mad at me. I literally say, I know you struggle.

I have like the skinniest friends that are like, you I look ugly here I'm here to tell you every interview is perfect. I didn't get that far They're like you said skinny bitches and you hate us when we hate you Or did it just sound loud it kept coming up in interviews That's what that period was riddled with is that all these interviews she'd sit down and then they would blast her with like they're saying This is anti-feminist and they're saying you're body shaming. I kinda wanna go like, if you're skinny, we got a girl that's wanted to be lighter her whole life,

we can't let this go. And the whole thing of accusing you of being anti-feminist is in itself anti-feminist. It's like, let's attack this 20 year old girl. I was like, all I do is write anthems for women to love themselves more. Exactly, that's so stupid. Oh, it just really made me mad reading about it today.

I was like, what is wrong with everyone? Can't you see? Oh, this is a 20-year-old woman from Nantucket who doesn't feel like one of these hot pop stars. Yeah. And you guys are just blasting her. A lot of people still today ask me like, how do you find this confidence in yourself?

And I was like, I write these songs because I don't feel any of these things. I write these songs so that maybe I can believe them someday. Well, they're almost characters, right? MGK, we interviewed him, and he created this persona in high school. This persona was his armor. Like, bass, I was like, what do I wish was on the radio? I knew writing, I was like, no one's going to play this.

And when they did, I was like, uh-oh, we broke through. And then meeting fans, meeting their parents in the meet and greet, they'd go, hey, we were about to meet my meeting fans, meeting their parents in the meet and greet, they'd go, hey, we were about to meet my kid, and they wouldn't leave the room for a year until your song came out, because they were so sad and insecure and depressed.

And whatever you put in that song, they're happy now. So thank you. And I was like, okay, I got this. Yeah, here's what's feminist is my little girl was walking around the house singing that song, feeling a million feet tall. Yeah And I do think that you come across extremely confident, which is a compliment.

Like you come across very confident. I've gotten way more confident. And compliments. Hopefully you've gotten far more compliments too. But I think there's a misnomer about quote confident people because everyone's confident in some areas and not confident in others and so they think that confident equals a toughness. Oh, whatever we throw at her, she doesn't care.

They equate having confidence with not caring. Or not having feelings. Exactly, which is so crazy, but I think you might suffer from that a little bit. I write songs too about how I don't post all my sad things. I wrote a song called Don't I Make It Look Easy on my last album. I just posted a picture and I read all the comments for an hour and I sat there and was thinking about this for way too long.

But just so you know, you won't ever see me cry on this app and I have a filter for every single lie. Don't I Make This Look Easy. Just because I'm looking great on Instagram and happy and smile, I'm not one of those people that posts like, I'm having a breakdown. So don't compare yourself to my life or think that everything's great.

Yeah. But at 20, when you are dealing with so many things at once, like a dream come true, an impossible hit that you probably are having a hard time comprehending. I couldn't understand, I had no idea. I didn't know about charts. But if you're in the real world

and if you turn on the radio, your song's on, which is bonkers. Yeah. And it's on for months and months. But if you're in the real world and if you turn on the radio, your song's on, which is bonkers. Yeah. And it's on for months and months. My parents will still record the little speakers at a Target or something. Yeah. And zoom in and they go, what a banger. I got it the other day.

We cannot get over it. If I'm in a store and my shit comes on, my knees collapse. I go, oh my God, that's me. So cool. It's the coolest thing in the world. Oh, I love it. Was that negative stuff hurting your feelings? Yeah, but not as loud as nowadays.

Back then, you saw it less. You didn't have TikTok. My mom, though, it wrecked her because she would stay up all hours of the night on Twitter, back when it was Twitter, and would delete, so I didn't see it. And one night before I was on the Today Show, I saw something so mean,

and she was like, I'm so sorry I tried to delete it before you saw it. And I was like, what show, I saw something so mean, and she was like, I'm so sorry I tried to delete it before you saw it. And I was like, what do you mean? You delete these? She was like, oh yeah, I sit there and I delete them all for you. And I was like, mommy.

Could you imagine reading people rip your kid apart? No. No, well I was imagining being your dad and hearing some asshole in an interview accuse you of not being a feminist or something. That would be impossible for me. He never comments on that stuff. He doesn't. He's trying to lead by example. Maybe, or we don't even bother him with that stuff.

I think it's so heartbreaking for my mom that I'm like, I don't want to... I'm such an open book lately because I don't care that I'm like, I want to help myself not be poop shamed and talk about my anal fissure. Well, I had an anal fissure. Yeah, that shit hurts. Normalize some stuff, especially with giving birth and all that.

I wrote a book about the gnarly, and my mom's like, can we not say anal fissure today? And I'm like, God, it's a long day. It's fine. And they make me feel normal when I know I'm not the only person that has it. Can we talk about anal fissures for one second? Because the thing I am grateful for having had an anal fissure. There's nothing to be grateful for.

It just sucks. There is. And people with anal fissures will be in the comments section saying, there's having had an anal fissure. There's nothing to be grateful for, it still sucks. There is, and people with anal fissures will be in the comment section saying, there's nothing good about an anal fissure. Anyways, the color of the blood is to be observed once in life. It is so- You think it's gorgeous? It is, it looks like Hawaiian punch.

It's impossibly red. It is bright red. It is the brightest red I've ever seen. Oh, and it's mixed with pee. In the first time I turned around and saw that, I was like, what happened? Yuck. Did I get shot?

When I went to a butt doctor finally, because I was like, I can't take the pain anymore, and the girl put a device up there and looked, immediately she was like, oh, yeah, that's a big anal fissure. I pictured like a parasite, like a worm. I was relieved to hear anal fissure, were you? I didn't know what it was, so I was like, oh my god, I have fissures.

Like, I got fish in my ass, get it out. And she was like, no, honey, it's just a big slice. And I was like, oh, it feels like a big slice. Well, the doctor looked and said, oh yeah, you have fish ass. Oh god. This is no problem. I thought she was saying that.

I was like, am I gonna die, you know? I thought I had hemorrhoids was my assumption, because I didn't know about anal fissures. I've never had a hemorrhoid that comes out and I am so terrified of the day. Me too. Have you had it? I've never had it. But when I saw all that Hawaiian punch, I was like, that must be a hemorrhoid. That's what I thought too. I was like, it's gotta be the internal hemorrhoid and it's coming out and I'm gonna die like this.

And I was expecting it because I sit on the toilet way too long. I had already been warned. I love it. I could spend the whole day there. Well, you husbands, you disappear like that. It's our only sanctuary. But it's not because my kids come in nonstop. I can't do that. We're potty training my kid, so don't attack me, Internet, but I pooped with him. Yeah, that's great. I mean, that's wonderful. Everyone hates when I poop near people, but listen, we both pooped at the same time. He was on his little potty and I was over here.

I use poop-rees. I know I can smell my poop. But we're like, we did it, buddies! I love that. Stay tuned for more Farm Chair Expert, if you dare. You would like this. My ex-girlfriend Bri and I, we had dreamed about one day having enough money and resources to build this toilet that we designed called the Rabbit. It's two toilets that are joined by a central tank system.

That way we could hold hands while we were doing it. And then we called it the bunny toilet because when you put the seat up, it would have looked like bunny ears. And you know about my toilets? No, do you have your own toilet? What? You're not saying this because of my famous toilets?

No. What do you mean? I have two toilets that sit side by side. No. Are you fucking with me? No, you're fucking with me. We are. You have dueling toilets in your bathroom?

I was on The Tonight Show, they won't stop talking about it. No. Wait, so you and your husband, they sit next to each other? This is so romantic. Yeah, so it is the best invention in my entire life. I can imagine you talking to the contractor. Here they are. One is bougie. Oh my god.

I thought you were doing this to me! No! I've never...oh! Those are my toilets. They sit side by side. Oh my Lord. When we first got there, there was like an old school bidet. And I was like, we're not gonna use that. And I was like, I have an extra toilet,

let's just pop that one next to it. And my plumber laughed at me. Of course. And I said, what's so funny, my dude? Get up there, like get it going. And it has a shared toilet paper. I put one in the middle for him. Central toilet paper. I get the boug the middle for him. Central toilet paper.

I get the bougie toilet and he has the cold one. Well, you should get him a brondle, the seat. Yeah, we're moving into a new house and it has a toilet facing this way and a bidet across from it. So I need to make this one a toilet. So it's gonna be a little different but it's a tighter bathroom area.

So we will be close. So you're gonna be like knees to knees. Knees to knees. And that's better. I wanna see him. I knees to knees. Knees to knees. So romantic. And that's better. I wanna see him. I got destroyed for this. Oh, of course you did.

Online. Imagine thinking this is normal. I was like, sorry, you don't know what love is. Get over it. You didn't go out and claim, oh, I do the most normal thing. I had two toilets. I said it like once casually on a podcast,

and then it blew up. Of course. I've had a lot of those moments. But you guys are just comfy. You're so comfortable. Oh, yeah. I want that. If you got something weird going on in your private parts. I'm like you need to look you like can you please see? I was to marry I think I'm like will you check out my butt you know Side my lover

Everyone should be free to have their own comfort level and then find a partner at the same comfort level But if two people Two lovers like you and your husband or a Brie and I back in the day, and you want to hold hands while you do that. I know, I think it's nice. Yeah, and we have new babies. Some people are so bummed. They're so sad.

Well, I'm bummed because I'm nervous that I'll never be that comfortable. You'd be surprised. No, Monica, we have been together recording this show for six and a half years and then friends for eight years. And she has not and will not fart. I won't fart in front of my team, but I will show them my open hooch. Oh, wow. In a fitting, you know? I'll go, it's there.

I'm not like, look at this, guys! But they've seen my open hole. But I won't fart in front of them. Farting is different for girls. Farting feels scary, but also I'd be fine with my lover pooping in front of them. Farting is different for girls. Farting feels scary, but also I'd be fine with my lover pooping in front of me, or us being knees to knees, but I'd just pee. Oh, I don't like him pooping next to me.

I tell him that, I go, you know we're not supposed to do that. We just pee. Oh! We're not shit. It's all for pee. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. You had assumed poop, didn't you? Here's why we did it it because we have young babies

So we're getting up every hour on the hour and this dude pees like a girl So I was like get out of my way I have to piss Chris and I have been in that situation where I'm like you need to hop up now I'll sometimes if I'm peeing and he has to go I'll hold my legs. I'll go go in sure and he's like no I'm not doing that. There's a shower, figure it out. So then I solved this crime and I was like, we're gonna pee at the same time. Okay, so this is more for number one.

This is practicality. This should be a thing. If you have enough money, yeah, why not? Okay, or plumbing, yeah. They're like, your pipes don't work like this. So we're like, come on. Okay, the other thing that happened shortly after base came out is a tour was planned,

your first big headlining tour, and your throat exploded. Yeah. And you had to cancel the entire North American tour. In your 20, what happened? I had a big polyp, like a big blister on my cords, and then it exploded to where I could like taste blood from singing every single night and talking all day.

And my voice isn't as strong as other artists. Like Rihanna can smoke and drink and then go to a two hour show and kill it. I can't talk very much in a day and then go to a show. Yours is sensitive. You know, like mine are just senstient. That's why I do sound the way I am, which is cool because my dad loves it because he's like, I can always tell it's you on the radio because you sound like you. But I had vocal surgery and then it didn't help

like it was supposed to. Then I had to do it again with a different doctor, and I haven't had surgery since because she was amazing. Dr. Baraboo, she saved my life. If you have vocal issues, go to Dr. Baraboo. What does she do? She goes in there. She went in there, and instead of carving off

the pimple of the thing because you lose some cord tissue, she's like, I'm going to get the problem, pull it out. And she shows you your whole surgery. The surgery I had before that, nobody showed me what happened. Nobody took notes. I don't know what happened in there. I like it. And she tried everything to not get to surgery. She's like, I'm going to put you with this vocal coach and do these warm-ups. I need you to be quiet for four months. I did that.

Then I ate too many edibles while doing that. And then I lost my mind. And then panic disorder started. Then I had panic attacks. All from the edible experience. Yeah, I took 50 milligrams on accident. Okay. Opened up a demon in my head. They generally come in five milligrams.

I was doing the Kiva coffee beans. Five milligrams. I was fine. Ran out. got a lollipop. It was 25 milligrams. Forgot I ate the lollipop. Was too high. Ate another lollipop. Was in the mood for probably just a lollipop. I said I want to get really, really high.

This is a day off. I was doing a puzzle and I stopped breathing. And I was like, Daryl? And my soul left my body. And then it came back later and I was dry heaving all night. It's horrible. But you had the wherewithal not to go to the back later and I was dry heaving all night. It was horrible.

But you had the wherewithal not to go to the emergency room. I knew, like, I fucked up. Or Darryl had the wherewithal. I was like, I'm dying. My best friend and my husband sat in bed with me all night and I was like, just make sure I don't die when I close my eyes. And we watched Pixar all night. And then I was high for like three days straight.

No way. Yeah, I wouldn't leave. And then panic attacks. I knew I could get to that place again, and so I would bring myself there all the time. Was that your last edible experience, or have you clawed your way back? Never again.

And then I would get paranoid because my brothers used to smoke weed, and I'm like, I can smell it, I'm getting high. It's that bad now. Sometimes if I take Tylenol PM now too, I'm like, I think my heart's stopping. Like I'm pretty sure I'm gonna die. I have that if I smell Captain Morgan still.

You panic? Yeah, well just because that's the first time I ever threw up. I registered that Santa's being poisoned. Yeah, my husband is an alcoholic too, so he doesn't drink. Oh, no kidding. Oh yeah, so now I'm in a sober home.

Oh wow. And so I don't drink because of that. I had Shirley Temple's on my 30th. Oh wow. Do you wish you could drink more? Not really, I'm not good at it. Even on my wedding night, I had tequila, and all I got was a splitting headache.

Yeah, that's how Kristen is. What's going on? I get hungover at night of? Right. Yeah, Kristen's like, I would love to do it, but I have half a glass of wine and then I have a headache. Yeah, I feel horrible, and then I'll either go on Amazon for too long, you know, and order some shit I forget about.

So there's no point for me. Now, having started so young writing, because here's what you see as a common trajectory with artists, is like they have a very prolific period, and then later in their career they write less and less and less. And I'm more curious, is that an age thing or is that just there's a window? I think it's also back in the day they would make money from songwriting. They would make like real cash.

We always talk about it now as like he made all his money off that one song. Right. And he didn't have to do it anymore. And was like I'm gonna go live on a beach somewhere. But nowadays I don't make money from my songs anymore. I make monies from deals on I'm like an influencer. Or if I have a private gig. I laugh all the time when I'm like an influencer. Or if I have a private gig, I laugh all the time

when I'm doing something ridiculous, and I go, I just wanna write songs, but this is cool too. Yeah. But also as a kid you were writing them nonstop for the joy of writing them, and you had no fantasy of even making money. Yeah, so I still do it now because that's my first love

and I feel like I'm good at it and there's fans out there that enjoy it. But I guess I'm curious, what seems it could be this situation is like a young athlete Yeah, like will I get worse and worse? No, not even worse and worse just burnt out because you started it so young. Do you have any of those fears? No, because an album cycle for me. I'm not writing all year long anymore I did back in the day They would have me do a session every day and I was like this too much brainpower

Do like my brain is gonna give up even when we're doing sessions for an album I told them Monday Wednesday Friday I need days off in between to give my brain a break But some people could do three sessions in one day and I'm like that's animal work I love people do drugs though to help sure a lot of our best writers I like especially as a parent with these young kids I tell them if you want to work with me you meet me at 9 or 10 a.m. And then we're done at 6. I want the whole song done I'll be done writing by noon

And then I'm just recording it and asking the producer to take six hours on it and usually we'll get the whole thing done Which is crazy a lot of people spend months on it. I'm like I want it. I am I found producers who are quick like that We're fast enough to keep up with me They love it because they're also parents, and they're like, I get to go home, put my kid to bed, instead of being in the still till two in the morning. A lot of the shit's completely unnecessary, but it's just how people have been doing it for 50 years.

Yeah, usually they just go till four in the morning, and I'm like, for what? Why are we still here? It's almost a say, like we worked so hard. Studio rats, like live in the studio. What's one of the crazier private gigs you've been asked, and you don't have to out the people, but just like scenario.

Just recently, my last one was tough. I've been at a couple parties where people have paid an exorbitant amount to get a really prominent singer to come, and I think this is so unfair to the singer because there's like 14 people here or something. It was bad, dude. Tell me.

I can tell you who, but it was like a bunch of smart people. Very smart, but they knew they were socially awkward. In the meet and greet, they were like, where do I stand? I don't know how to do this. And I was like, it's okay, buddy. Like, come here. And they're like in suits and they were so sweet, so nice and cute. They wanted an acoustic gig and a Q&A for an hour.

I did enough songs for a half hour. And in between each song, they would ask me questions about my whole life on a stage in front of all these people. I was kind of a club, but a theater too. Okay. I've never heard so much talking in my life. During a musical performance.

It's not even their fault. They're like at this company that works all over the world and they've come together at this one place to meet in person for the first time. So they're like, Janice! They're like, it's so good to put the face to the email! And they're like, Janice! And they're like, so Megan! Like, screaming with a microphone,

what would you like your legacy to be? And everyone is talking as loud as they can, and I'm like, oh, I don't know, no one cares! And then I sing my acoustic song with my guitar player, Chris, who was at my Durango Things with me. And I was just singing my heart out and maybe four people were watching and they're chitchat. And I was like, I'm in the back of a restaurant again,

which I used to do those shows and they were soul crushing. And I was like, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. But also like, this is a job, this is a job. You're lucky to be here, you're blessed. Give me my money. The mental racket to continue your year. I do think a lot of people would hear that. Big artists are doing these gigs

and there's so much judgment, like why would they do it? But this is why, because there's no money. Yeah, no, and I'm buying a house that I cannot afford. With two toilets. And my managers and I, when we get deals like this, we're always like, we gotta do it, we're house streaming. We're gonna do all these gigs. Have you played anywhere in the Middle East?

No. You probably will at some point. I always hear about these, like, come play at some prince's birthday party. Oh no, I wish, oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well like, Rihanna just sang at this Indian wedding, and I think it was for like,

It looks like the Olympics. $11 million or something. That's a check. You could really do some house shopping. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're there for a reason. Yeah, they are. And then someone else told me this crazy story

about playing for like an oligarch. I don't know what an oligarch is. Of Russian billionaire that's been anointed by Putin. Oh no. Yeah, not great. Well, this was pre-Ukrainian invasion. It's still bad. But they finished their thing,

and the guy said he wants to hear those two songs three more times. And they said, well, no, we don't really do that. And the guy was like, you're definitely doing that. It became kind of like a mafia show. When I do a private gig like that, I go, what else could I do for you? When it's an awkward crowd like that, I go, what else could I do for you? When it's an awkward crowd like that,

I do save the day because I go, all right, come up to the front of the stage, FaceTime your daughter or FaceTime your kid, or just record and tell me their names. So for half of the show, they were barking out, Stacey and Katrina! And I was like, okay, hi Stacey and Katrina, it's Meghan Trainor and your mama loves you.

You know, I just did like 50 of those. And they were like, okay, hi, Stacey and Katrina, it's Meghan Trainor and your mama loves you. You know, and I just did like 50 of those. And they were like, that was the best part. I am your entertainer tonight. I am here for you. Okay, this is potentially dicey, but I'm so curious. I'm only willing to really bring this up because I just watched this horrific video, but you were on a show,

you were one of the hosts with Puff Daddy. And I had a really weird run-in with him early on when I just was on Pont, where we almost fought, but he had a bunch of security guards. And I didn't like him then. I was like, I don't like this guy. He's a dark motherfucker. And then I just saw this fucking video. Have you seen the video of him assaulting the woman in the hotel? It's the most gruesome serial killer. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Kidder, drugger. I. Oh yeah. He beat her. On a video. Kicked her, drug her, I mean, it's so fucking dark. Like, can't you go to prison for that? Her big statement that's come out of that is, basically like, I appreciate everyone having that reaction and people need to listen to women the first time they say it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That was incredible. That's her big takeaway, which is incredible. She's been saying this. Yeah. I didn't even know anything other than that video. I don't know like any of the backstory. She had already said that that had happened. And no one really cared or listened

and now people are listening. But how was the show? Yeah, well, was it like working with him every day? It was hard. It was hard. The first thing that was hard was the hours because we were told, okay, we're gonna start shooting at 8 p.m. and we didn't start shooting until midnight.

What was the show? It was called The Four and it was talent competition show. It was like a brand new show that he was a producer on and we were trying to make it a big thing, like American Idol and one of those. It was a great concept, it was very cool. The singer would come out and audition. If we liked them, they would get a blue circle

and it was up to us to decide, but we weren't on each other's teams. It was a singing competition. Singing competition and it was me, at one point, Charlie Walk, who then got canceled immediately during Me Too. Sounds like a really safe environment for you. That group. They were like, are you okay?

I was like, no. Khaled was very sweet. He was a big teddy bear and he was always kind. And I saw like, oh, nobody knows this. You guys are going to get Scooby-Doobs. I just saw Diddy not be nice to him. Fergie was the host. This girl's in a corset, in a dress, and heels,

working her ass off, has a kid at home waiting for her, and she's there working, and me and her, they're right on time, ready to go on stage, and we're waiting for hours. And then they finally show up, like I saw Diddy yell at Calla, like, you look like Easter bunny change Bully like go change your outfit and I was like no Khaled you look great. I'm sorry, you know And then there was always drinks under the tables

I would knock him over on accident all the time and I was like I'm gonna die here He's gonna be so bad, but we were cordial. I try to be friendly and like how you doing? But there's a moment on the show where I'm crying and and they turned it into, are you sad the artist is leaving? And I was like, yes. But it wasn't that. Uh... Eee. Weird. And I meet so many people now, years later, who are crew guys, and they come up to me,

they're like, yo, I did the four with you. And I was like, are you okay? And they're like, nah. It was one of those shows. People use that as an example of what we're not gonna do Because it went till four in the morning and we were miserable those poor singers had to sing out like 2 a.m Oh my god, hope you're good A lot of them are 16, you know Not even made sense, but people loved it and it still has viral clips, but it'll never be a show ever again

I hope doesn't seem like it based on what's going on. Yeah, and that video rattled me. Yeah, it's very disturbing. Made me so angry. Okay, let's talk about, most importantly, Timeless. The T-Pain song, Ben Like This, is already out. How does one decide? I love that song. Yeah, it's really good.

You've worked with a lot of rad people, and you guys are from such different backgrounds. I've loved him the most my whole life. When I had my agency meeting with CAA, they were like, who's your favorite artist? And they've only heard all about the bass, so they thought some doo-wop person, you know, and I was like, T-Pain.

They laughed and they were like, huh? I was like, T-Pain is my god and my king, and he's taught me everything I know. And I want to pee next to him. Literally, and every year on every interview, they're like, who are your favorite songwriters? I'm like, Carole King and T-Pain. And I always bring them up and they're like,

that's so funny. You just love this guy. And then recently he's been blowing up on TikTok because people are like, did you know he could sing? And I was like, yeah, I've always known. Yeah. From first one in. Auto-Tune can only do so much, okay? But that dude is musical and all his Tiny Desk performances are popping off.

And so I knew I always want to collab with him and I finally got his number. He knows how much I love him. And I was like, my dude, my dream in life is to have a song, say, featuring T-Pain. I'll do whatever it takes. I'll send you a hundred songs. I sent him a bit like this and he was like, this is incredible. I would love to. Come on, it went that well? It went that well, it was so good.

Then he ghosted me forever, for like months. Uh oh, Monica. I'm triggered by being ghosted. I was like, oh no, he hates me and he hates it. So I sent another song, I was like, if that one sucks, this one can work too. Still ghosted me. And my team was literally like, where is he?

Did he text back? And I was like, no, and I'm freaking out. Then it was my birthday, and so I gave up on that dream, but I was like, at least have T-Pain show up to my birthday, please, that's all I'm asking. I was like, I've never got to hug him. Please, if you don't get T-Pain, I'm going to be pissed. And so then they got me a cameo,

and they played it for me at the beginning of the day, and I was devastated. I was like, that's it? Yeah, this is not what I, no. I was like, that's it? Yeah, this is not what I... No. I was like, I could have paid for that. And then later that night after the party, they're like, there's one more gift in the basement for you in the studio. And I was like, I'm so tired, dude.

I'm done. What is it? And he was like, I can't tell. It's a puppy. Let's go. And I was like, what? And then I went down there and my whole family was there and friends. I saw a security guard and I was like, what's happening?

And then they're like, hey, Megan, what's this? And he came out the bathroom, did a poop joke, said, don't go in there. Oh, we love him. I love him. And my knees broke and I fell. I was laughing and crying at the same time. And I finally got to hug him.

It was the best hug of my life. And I was like, you look so good. And he's like, thank you. And then he was like, not only did I feature on Ben Like This, but I also featured on your other song you sent me. So he had already done it. Oh yeah, my team effed with me and said,

don't tell her you did it, save it for her birthday. Oh my, what was the gap between you sending? Months. Months. Months. Like four to five months. This is a long game they're playing. Was this December 22nd? Yeah, I renewed my vows too.

On that same day? Yeah, every five years. This is the day? It was the best day I'll ever have, so it's over now. Also big birthday, 30th birthday, renewed vows, T-Pain drops a steamer and then comes out of the bathroom. That's the perfect joke. It was the best day.

And then we played all our songs for each other. Oh! And my dad was crying because he knew that was like my lifelong dream. So when you ask someone like that to feature on your song, you send them the song and then they just send you back? Usually, yeah. He lives in Atlanta, so I knew he had a studio there and he records all his vocals himself and produces all his tracks.

So I was like, yo, if you just lay a verse on this, send it back, let me know. And there would never be any talk beyond that, right? Like you could never go like, oh, I love 97% of it, but this one line, you would never be able to give notes on a feature. I wonder if you could. They're mostly great.

You don't give it to an artist that you don't trust. He murdered it. Both of them. And the coolest part was the other songs called Love and Hold. Both my brothers wrote that song with me. What? So when he played that, my mom and dad were sobbing. And they were like, we wrote a song with T-Pain on it?

So cool. Too many dreams came true that day. Do you have other fun features on Timeless? Yes, I have Nisi Nash. Ooh. I know. The greatest actress ever and like a comedian beyond. She is on Reno 911.

She's on Getting On. She just won an Emmy for Help Me Out With This Show. She's on Claws, but she won an Emmy for her drama acting. The Murderer! Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Dahmer. Dahmer! Dahmer!

She was the neighbor that was like, something's fishy here and it's not my anal fissure. You know what I'm saying? She was like, something's fishy here and it's not my anal fissure. You know what I'm saying? She was like, something's going on. Somebody believe me. Okay, now listen, I love serial killer stuff. I was so excited to see Dahmer. You watched it. I couldn't watch it.

I couldn't watch it. I couldn't watch it. Why couldn't you? Too much, too real. My thing was knowing the smell. They made such a meal over the fact that he had rotting bodies and he kept trying to cover up all the smells. I don't like when it gets gross.

I could watch Slaughter, dude. I could watch Murders, and I could not watch this. That might be the only thing I was too much for me. I think you've got to shut this off. That and Reindeer, I'm making my way through it. Oh, baby reindeer. Baby reindeer. Baby reindeer is the best show ever.

It's incredible. It is a tough watch. It's so hard to watch. But my good god, I hope that actress wins every award there is. Me too. It just triggers when I shouldn. But my good God, I hope that actress wins every award there is. Me too. It just triggers when I shouldn't have slept with someone and I did, and then I have to

be nice and I have to go through that whole experience. That's my most hated moment in life. You feel guilt and shame and then you want to be kind, but you want to get out of there. That was so overwhelming, just the beginnings. And then his whole fucking getting molested in the drug addiction stuff. I'm like, Jesus Christ, now this is my story and I've got a watch. I know I'm like, oh my god watch You know what don't watch that show, you know, yeah, not for you I'm watching it

But I don't think it shows ever taken a bigger toll on me the amount that he went through I feel like someone's been through a little bit of each moment. It's so relatable on so many little tiny places Oh my god her texts. Oh my God. I can't not. You're just in bed like, no. Oh my God. And when you find out it's real and he's the guy, I looked it up and I was like, Darryl, it's him.

I was like, no. What a brave story to tell. My last episode was the crazy drug episode. Yeah, me too, episode four. Bro, keep going. It's hard. Keep going. I know, I know. That one took it out of me. It's hard. Keep going. I know, I know.

For me. That one took it out of me. Keep going, it's great. It gets better. Also, it locked into how desperately he wants to get into comedy and he's out there and that guy just preys upon him. It's like, okay, great, now I'm back to just moving to LA and I just would do anything to be seen.

It's rough. There are guys like that, for sure. They're like, you wanna be a little star? That's cute. And I was like, I gotta get outta here. Ooh! Yeah, scary. Okay, so Nisi, had she ever sang before?

No, she had an amazing speech when she won an Emmy. She's like, and you know who I wanna thank? I wanna thank me for believing in me and doing what they said I could not do because she was always in comedy. And she was like, I could crush a dramatic show. I'm an actress that can do it all. And that clip went viral of her.

And the next day, my managers, we were like all crying watching her win the award. I always ask them, like, I need inspo to write. My life is pretty great and boring right now. And they sent me that clip and they were like, duh. So I wrote a song. I think your kids will love it. It's like, I want to thank me.

And it's a big upbeat awesome song. And I use her quote in the beginning and I use her throughout the song. And I sent it to her that night, I wrote it, and was like, if you get the chance to record yourself listening to this, I would love to know if you like it. I would love it to say featuring you,

I'd love you to get publishing on this. I want you to be my co-writer. And I would also love, if you do approve this and love this Can you come over and sing backgrounds on it? And She sent a video of her like sobbing listening to it clapping She's like I didn't even know this could be a possibility from winning that award Hmm, and then her wife and her and her daughter came over and sang backgrounds and it was the best day

Oh my god, my mom was just fangirling so hard. You had so many great days. We've had a lot of great days. I'm happy for you. Thank you, I never want to die. It's too good. Not that one, I think we should not. It's not one, it's too good here.

And my past life must have sucked if that's real. You know what I mean? Or, Sim, you must consider the fact that you could be in a simulation. All the time I'm like, please don't wake me up. Right too good. Don't unplug. Yeah. How old are your babies? Ten months old and three and a half. Oh, wow. So you're really deep in it Yeah, and will there be a third or not? Yes. I'm gonna have two more girls

You already have two girls. No, I want two girls. I have two boys. Oh, yeah I need my daughter. So you're manifesting it? There's a lot of dudes in my house. Yeah. Are you trying weird sex stuff where there's positions that are supposed to make the sperm that's slow go up the hill?

It's like all my husband's fault, but I love my boys. They're perfect. Apparently, it's only up to him. On the second baby, I tried eating extra acidy foods. I took some weird questionable stuff from Amazon and I was like, this could make all the difference. I did a weird position.

Just so you know, I'm not yawning because of you. You've yawned twice now and I'm freaking all new personally. I knew you clocked it. Here's some fucking coffee. No, listen, I knew you clocked it. What's wrong with you? I left Lisbon, Portugal yesterday. Okay, you're deadlocked.

At 7 p.m. here. What were you doing there? Oh, Jesus shit. The yawn, I wanted to clear up. Twice. I, you're deadlocked. At 7 p.m. here. What were you doing there? Oh, Jesus shit. The yawn, I wanted to clear up. Twice. I saw you register at both times, you're like, oh fuck, this guy's yawning. How was the concert, was it great?

Oh. I was head to toe in pink for Lover. Quite a time to be alive. I hope people have those moments at my concerts. They do for sure. They have to. They will. I was even debating whether I not to tell you the Delta story

because I live with someone who gets that all the time. Kids' relationship with Frozen is obviously very powerful. And so I see my wife quite often hear from parents, there's only so much you can take on. It's very hard to compute. You're hearing it, you know intellectually what that means. But when you're on the other side of it,

it means so much to you. So like Delta singing that song for a year. It's the greatest thing. It is the greatest thing. But I can't imagine you can necessarily internalize that you did something and it was a part of someone's life. So definitely kids were at your show and they were there with their dads and their moms

and their dads and their moms got to see them be happy in a way that nothing but music can make someone happy. Yeah, it's a power. And it's the sweetest moment on Earth. And yeah, you can give that to people. It's crazy. Okay, so everyone should check out Timeless, the whole album, you will tour with Timeless.

Yes, September and October. And where will you be going? All of America. Will you be here? Yes. Can we go? I will be at the Q Forum, you have tickets. I'll see you there October 19th, please be going? All of America. Will you be here? Yes. Can we go? I will be at the Q Forum. You have tickets. I'll see you there October 19th.

Please be here. Oh, OK. For the love of God. I would love to bring my daughters. Your daughters can come on stage. I'll do whatever they want. I know that'd be too much. That show, I told everyone to go on stage.

Paris Hilton's going on stage. Everyone's going on stage. Oh, really? So LA is the show. I hope TK will be there. LA is the show. It's going to be the last show of the whole tour. Fun.

So we're going out with a bang. It's also like my last bucket list. I've never got to tour arenas. And people think I do all the time. They're like, of course you could. I'm like, nah, I haven't. And I didn't tour for seven years, so I don't know if people are coming. But I'm doing Madison Square Garden,

which I want to throw up. I can't believe that's real. You've never performed there? No, and Natasha Benningfield is opening, which is a joke. It should be the other way around. Paul Russell will be there, who sings, give me a little boo-dang.

Oh, I love that zoom-ash-a. He's so nice, he's so sweet, I was just with him. And then my good friend, my TikTok lover, Chris Olsen. I don't know if you've seen him on my videos, he's so good. You don't know anything. We're not on TikTok, I know. Okay, he's memos. He is gonna do something.

He can sing, he can dance, he can act, he's great. And then my older brother never has DJed before, but he is going to be the DJ every single night. I love this. This tour will be his first recital. This is wonderful. And he's my child again. You lured him back in to your home.

You're my baby boy, and this is your first time performing. It's cute that you live on your own, but now you're coming with me for two months on the road. What other cities? We're doing Red Rocks. Oh. Literally never been to many of these places. Nervous, I'm so excited.

It'll be fantastic. We're very excited to come see you. Where do people go to get tickets for this? My Instagram, there's definitely a link, linkin'bile. You got a link tree? Yeah, it's gotta be there. Tiktok, it's gotta be there. Okay, you're on TikTok as well.

I got 18 million followers on TikTok. Dang, girl. Whoa, 18.5, I sl gotta be there. Okay, you're on TikTok as well. I got 18 million followers on TikTok. Dang girl. Whoa, 18.5, I slay on there. I'm an influencer now, I dance. Yes. I do fun fun, I talk about my anal fissures. Oh my gosh. And the people love the realness.

This is the first time I'm regretting not being on TikTok. Oh man, you would love it there and you would hate it. Okay, Megan, you're so fun. I hope everyone listens to Timeless, but more importantly, I hope they go immediately and buy tickets to see you on tour. Show up. September and October.

Please come to my show. If I see empty seats, I'm gonna cry. No, they're gonna come to your show. There'll be no crying. Tell everyone you know about the album, please. Yes, Timeless. We will be at this LA show. We are excited.

Dude, you're gonna be on stage. What are you gonna wear? Don't make me sing. Don't make me sing. Thank you for having me on this podcast, this is huge. And I get to meet your mom now? It's the biggest podcast I've ever been on. Yeah, she's outside, she'll freak out.

She's like, I'm honored to sit in this driveway. Love you. Bye. Love you. Stick around for the fact check. Because they're human, they make lots of mistakes. Are those called jellies? Yes, they are.

They are. They're still called jellies? Jelly shoes. Jelly shoes. I call them that. Was that an actual brand or a description of a shoe? I think it was a description. Okay.

Unless maybe there was an original brand. Jellies. But I think it was just a description. Do you think anyone thought that meant the shoes were jealous? Oh, I hope not. Okay. You're getting tacos tonight?

Taco Tuesday, this lovely couple that we've hung out with a few times at the fishing lodge trip, invited us up to do Taco Tuesdays. Ooh. Yeah. Well, that'll be fun. What kind of tacos are you gonna eat? Well I'm always nervous when I attend, you know, the fucking diet's so goddamn restrictive.

It's like, you know, I'm just praying they have corn taco shells. Oh fuck. Now what's the move if they don't? I guess I'll have a plate of the ground beef and throw some lettuce on top and some salsa. Now I have a question. Ask it.

Oh, I have to pick the right person. Oh, okay, there's a thought experiment. Okay, I guess we'll go with Letterman. Okay. Oh, this is high stakes already. Yeah, that's the point. David Letterman you're referring to. No, Jonathan Letterman.

Oh, Jonathan Letterman, yeah. Okay, if Letterman called you. Oh, that'd be fun, yeah. And then you picked up and you said, hey Dax, it's Dave. I really enjoyed my time with you. I've been thinking a lot. Six years ago.

Okay. I've been thinking about you a lot lately. Oh wow. And I'm wondering if you wanna come over for dinner, would you ever wanna do that? Yeah, what, tonight? I plan tonight, but how about on Friday? Could you do Friday?

Of course, yeah, I would love to. I'm really looking forward to that. I really wanna talk to you about sobriety and. Oh, great, it's my favorite topic. Oh, I thought that. Well, that and molesting. Oh, I wanted to talk to you about that too, actually. Great, I can't wait to hear.

All right, great, well come over at six. I'll send you my address. My wife and, uh-oh, does he have a wife? Yeah, yeah, he's got a wife and a child. My wife and child will be there. Okay, should I bring my wife and childs? Yes, please, I would love that. Okay, bye.

Okay, bye. And he hangs up. And then you get ready. First of all, what are you gonna wear? You know my normal stuff. Levi's jeans and Ohm t-shirt probably. Okay, let's go back to the phone call. And I'm gonna dress up.

You don't have to, you don't have to. Okay good, I won't, because I don't dress up generally. Oh, okay well that's fine. Okay, I'll see you then. Great, can't wait. Bye. Click. Okay. Okay, and you're really, okay. I'll see you then. Can't wait. Click. Okay.

Okay, and you're really not gonna dress up? No. No, no, no, no, no. I don't dress up. You know my feelings on this. You do. I've ranted on this. All it is is this elaborate system

to establish class and rank. Not in this case. That's how it started. Well, but it's just vestigial. We're carrying on with it. No, if he's like, it's also fun to dress up. Sure, if you like dressing up, great. But the notion that people need to present

in a certain way to establish that they belong in a certain place, I fundamentally reject. He just likes doing that and he. Then he should. He should do everything he likes. Wow, you're really not gonna come. I would never dress up to appease someone's sense of propriety.

But if it's like I'm hosting a fun dinner where people dress up. Yeah, but it's like I'm gonna wear red shoes because they're fun. Will you also wear red shoes? That's crazy, no one would ever request that. So like I'm gonna wear a suit, cool. I don't know what that has to do with me wearing a suit.

Right? I think. I'm gonna wear my hair up, I'm gonna wear braids, I'm gonna wear a watch tonight. Like why is the suit any different than any other thing? I'm gonna wear a watch on Friday, are you gonna wear a watch? It's different.

Tell me how. It's not different in theoretical terms. It's different in the reality of the world we live in. Yeah, we do live in a world where you're trying to establish your status by how you dress. We do live in that world. I don't deny that. Okay, we're going on,

I am going on a vacation with our friends for 4th of July, and there's a dinner one night that Charlie's planning, and he said, dress up. Oh great, that sounds great. It sounds like everyone wants to. Well I don't know if everyone wants to, he just said that, and I think it would, it's fine. It sounds like what you're saying maybe is,

it's really fun to put more effort into something to symbolize that this is important. Is that fair? I guess, sure. I'm not thinking about it that intensely. I'm just saying if someone tells me, we're having this dinner and we're throwing it and dress up, it'll be fun.

I'm gonna dress up. I'm just not thinking like, oh, but I hate dressing up. So fuck. I'm not gonna do it, I'll just do it, because it doesn't cost me. Right, because you enjoy being dressed up. That's a huge difference right here. I cannot stand wearing a suit and a tie and a button-up shirt.

Just because it's uncomfortable. It's totally uncomfortable. And then I sit down and like, I gotta get this jacket off. It's insane to wear this jacket. You would never wear your normal jacket during dinner because it's really restrictive and it's a second layer that you don't need because you already have a shirt on.

But there's this other jacket we've decided you should wear while you're eating, which just on the surface we would agree is pretty preposterous. Well, that's different, I guess, for me, because no, if I'm wearing a jacket, it's part of my outfit, I'm wearing it at dinner. I'm not thinking.

Yeah, and you love it, you want to. Like you're excited how you look in the jacket and everything. But for me, I don't enjoy being in a suit. The collar's always too tight on my neck. I've got a tie that's gotta constantly be adjusted. And then I've got this thing on, do I take it off and drape it over my chair?

Am I supposed to have it buttoned? All of it, I don't enjoy. So if I said like, guys come over, we're doing cowboy boot night, and then my friend goes, oh, cowboy boots really hurt my feet. I'd go, great, don't wear them. Okay, but you wore a suit to the day we were supposed to wear suits at Bill's,

Bill Gates' day when we were in India. Oh, well, I was mandated. Okay, so you would have to be told specifically. Yes, and now to go on a business trip where we're gonna interview somebody and it's for my job, I'll wear a suit to a premiere, because that's my job. But dinner at a friend's house,

if they're saying you gotta wear a suit to my house for a casual dinner, I'm gonna have a hard time with that. Is there anyone? That I would wear a suit to their house? If they did what I did, which is like, some of us are dressing, we're dressing up. Can I ask you?

No pressure, but everyone's dressing up. Yeah, why is it important that I'm also dressed up to you, host of this dinner? Well, I'm not the host. David Letterman is. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn't care. Great, then of course I'll just dress how I'm comfortable.

And you're not uncomfortable being in a place where everyone is dressed up. No, not at all, not at all. Okay, well that answers my, cause this wasn't the thought experiment. It now became the thought experiment. Oh, that's my, because this wasn't the thought experiment. It now became the thought experiment. Oh, that's kind of fun. But it was basically the same thought experiment,

which is you arrive at Letterman's house, he's made dinner, homemade, and you can't technically eat any of it. Would you eat it? No. No, I'm not going to injure myself to make someone happy. Well, but wait, there's always something for me to eat. Well, so you just find something.

Yes. But what if everything had garlic and gluten? Like, I mean. Well, then I couldn't eat it. I can't eat, Monica, are you suggesting I eat something that's gonna make my joints hurt and my skin flake off and my eyebrows to be polite? Kind of. It's a white-tie garlic bread party.

Yeah, exactly. It's one thing if he didn't make it. If he ordered food, there's less pressure there. Right. But I think if someone makes food for you and you go, like you accept the invitation, you go, and you do not eat the food, I think that's really bad. Let me just paint another scenario.

I'm the host, I invite six people over, I make six ribeye steaks. The guest goes, I'm vegetarian. Well, obviously you can't eat this steak. It doesn't hurt my feelings. They're a vegetarian. I wouldn't be offended. And that wouldn't even injure them. So this other food that someone made for me,

if I go like, oh man, if I eat that garlic and that gluten, tomorrow my wrists are gonna hurt so bad I won't be able to journal in the morning and then my eyebrows are gonna flake off and turn red. You'd have to be a crazy host to still want me to do that. I mean. I mean there's no difference than someone like going I'm allergic to apples,

I have a hard time breathing if I eat an apple and I go I'm still gonna need you to eat this apple. You have done it many, many, many times. And lived in real agony. I mean, there's 10 years where I didn't even know that's what was going on. I was seeing a surgeon for my knee. No, but I'm talking about more recently.

When you've known, before you got super, super strict on this diet, you would do stuff, you would eat stuff. I wouldn't. And you'd be like, oh, I'm flaking. Yep, and also I would take my immune suppressant before I did that. It happened one night at the fishing lodge, which is like, what got put out was like

gluten, gluten, gluten, then garlic mash, garlic, asparagus, and then fish. So I couldn't eat it, I don't eat fish. So I just didn't eat, but I was a blast at the dinner party. I told a lot of stories and joked and talked and had fun and then I got back to my room and I had a tub of cottage cheese with ground beef poured over it. What'd you think?

So I get, okay, so no one. Do you think though that there's an inherent difference from our childhood foundation which allows me to do this and for you it'd be scary, which is like you'd be really pointing a finger at your otherness. It's more than an otherness, it would feel rude. And like the last thing I could ever be is rude.

Right. I didn't have the could ever be is rude. Right. I didn't have the leeway of being rude at all. Yeah, totally, but I would argue that even if, when I walked in, you thought I was rude for not wearing the proper outfit, over the course of a dinner, you'd realize, I'm not rude at all, I'm very thoughtful and conscientious of other people,

and you would go, oh, he's not rude, he just didn't wear the outfit. Like, I think my character would shine much brighter than my outfit choice. If I left someone's dinner and they concluded I, Dak Shepard, was a rude person because I hadn't had the right outfit on, I can't see that happening.

Yeah, but what about the food? The food is more likely to cause a rudeness. Right, again, and if someone thought I was rude because I was unwilling to eat food I'm allergic to. Yeah, you don't care. Yeah, that would be, and I just, I can't see that happening. If they spent the whole night with me and I was asking them questions about themselves

and engaging. Well, that's a different kind of, it's more like. Disrespectful? Yeah, to me they're very similar. Like rude and disrespect are the same to me, I guess. And to be fully honest, I am disrespectful. I don't respect the premise of wearing suits. I wanna move on to the food thing

because that's why, this is how I was trying to start. Oh, because Taco Tuesday. That was the actual thought experiment. It got thwarted by the suit. But the food thing is really why I wanna ask. Because you're going to someone's house tonight and there's a, you don't know what's gonna be there. Yep, I might not be able to eat.

Back to the dinner party. The host is cooking. So in that case, she's like, oh, you're gonna love this carne asada. I cooked it with 10 cloves of garlic. I would then have beans and rice. Wait, okay, but I'm back to Letterman's house. Oh, okay.

So yeah, so there's zero for me to eat at the dinner. Yeah, I want it to be so that you're in a rock and a hard place where you have a plate that's empty or you like, would you ever, because I think if I were in that position, I would. You would move it around your plate. Yeah, or honestly, I would probably just eat it. Yeah, yeah.

I'm just sucking it up and having the scratchy face for a day. But if it's not, then I would just sucking it up and having the scratchy face for a day. But if it's not, then I would just pick it around and mess up my plate. Cut it up, move it, dump some in your napkin. Yeah, but I'm never just putting a plate with no food or not putting a plate in front of myself. I would go, I'm so sorry,

you clearly worked all day on this, it looks delicious. I would love to eat it, I can't eat garlic or gluten. I should have told you that ahead of time. So I can't eat anything. And they would go, oh my God, what are you gonna eat? And I would go, I'm delighted to eat cottage cheese. I can go grab something out of your fridge. I know you don't want me to sit here and not eat.

Let me just grab something. I'm so simple. Oh no. I could fix this easily. And then my wife will eat all this food. So you'll have one of us. Okay, take them away then. It has to be just you.

Oh, it's just me and one. You can't pawn it off on anyone else. Okay, he's made this elaborate meal for me. I don't have any cottage cheese here. I don't eat cottage cheese. Okay, would you mind if I looked in your fridge? I guarantee I can find myself. Oh no, my fridge smells really bad.

There was a stink bug in there earlier today and I don't feel really comfortable with you opening it. Do you have a stick of butter? I used it in the garlic. Garlic puree? Yeah. In the garlic smoothies. I'll order you something.

Don't worry, I'll order you something. Oh again, that is, I really could. This guy doesn't eat anything I cook. By the way, we're pretending we live in a reality where I can't post anything I want to their house. That's tricky. Not if I say, I just eat something out of your fridge and they go, our fridge is broken.

We have no other food. If they would prefer I sat there and ate nothing, or prefer I make myself sick, versus order something to the house, I guess I don't even wanna be friends with the person, even if they're my hero. If I found out that was who Letterman was, I actually don't wanna be friends with him.

I think you would still, knowing you, I think you would still want his approval pretty bad. But listen, I think that your speech was good. Oh, what'd you want? I'm so sorry. Oh, right, right, right. I see how much work you put into this. You put so much work in.

It looks so good. I'm sorry I'm gonna take it off. Make sure you say it looks so good. It looks so, oh, I said that. I said I would love to eat this. This is some of my favorite food. I just happen to be allergic to garlic. Just allergic, I can't eat anything.

And in retrospect, they should not be wearing a tank top to your party. Yeah, that's what you should also add, okay. All right, wow. What would be a fun thought experiment for me would be like, what could someone arrive and do at my house that would offend me? And they would just have to,

I don't care what the clothes are, but if they were completely booger stained, that would be the only thing, is I would want that there be some bar of cleanliness. Oh, okay. If they came in and they just had food spilled all over the front. But not if it's Aaron. Well, he doesn't have any.

I mean, if he's- Well, you're right. He could poop at the table and I wouldn't care. Okay, well, we got to the bottom of that. I think if you came to my house for dinner, I spent 18 hours cooking and you didn't eat, and then you would say your speech and I would get it, but I would still be sad.

Right, now, I hate to flip the tables on you, but we've known each other for quite a long time. We're very good friends. If I came to your house and you cooked everything I can't eat, that's on you. I actually, I'm mad at you. I'd be like, how can we consider it? Why did you fucking invite me over?

You know I can't eat any of this. But you don't get to. This is like you invite me over, the only thing to drink is fucking alcohol. Like you just wouldn't do that. The only thing for dinner is cocaine. Listen, I would never do that, but you can't have it both ways.

You can't be mad at me for cooking for a bunch of people and not including you, and then also reverse, not expect to. If you're cooking for a bunch of people, great. If you invite me over for dinner and you make garlic bread and pasta, then you really don't give a shit about me. Of course.

Yeah, I know. I would never do that. Or if you invited me over for a fish fry. I mean, man, this is a real fuck you to me. Well, maybe you'd like it. Okay, well, there's some potential problems coming our way, but hopefully we'll be able to avoid them. Anyway, I'm surprised you weren't gonna try the fish.

No, because I've done that a million times to make a million people happy. You know, I dated Bree for nine years. I'd go up to the Puget Sound. The dad's cooking, he's catching salmon. It's an hour old. It's cooked the perfect way, and everyone's like, if you're ever gonna love fish,

this is the time. I'm like, okay, I'll try it again to make everyone happy. And at a certain age, I'm like, I gotta stop making other people happy to try this fish. I don't like it, and it's okay, and I don't drink. Like, I think because I also have some experience. It's not. No, you wanna know the real stressful thing is that.

When you first get sober, and you're going to people's houses and it's cocktail hour, and it's a fucking bummer if one person's not participating in cocktail hour. It's a vibe, everyone wants to do the same thing. Nowadays different. So maybe you missed a good window to get sober. Nowadays people, if someone says like, I don't drink, there's no pushback.

Like you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. But certainly at 29, where I was moving through the world, it was a bummer for people to find out I wasn't gonna be drinking with them. So it's like, I had to learn to get over that. And I think once you get over that, I think maybe it liberated me to go like, yeah, I don't, it's okay how I am.

It is okay how you are, but you do have to be considerate of other people. Of course. I don't even think that's a measure of being considerate. Wait, what, sorry, what? Like I need you to eat fish, you know? Oh, right. I don't think that's being considerate.

That's not. I mean more not eating the food that the person made. That feels a little more testy in the consideration. It feels like it's gonna be a bummer for that person that they worked really hard to make something they thought I would like. And that's a bummer, but we'll just have to deal with that because I can't eat something I'm allergic to.

Yeah, I get it. Ding ding ding. We need to start watching Justified. Do you want to do that together? Do you want to commit to that? Because everyone that I end up having these conversations about Walton Goggins with, which happens a lot for me, because I talk about how much I like him,

almost all of them go like, well, did you watch Justified? And I go no, and they're like, oh, he's like, you've seen it? Yeah, so I think it's maybe worth us time traveling, watching that for Goggins. I would do that. Adam Scott was the person I was most recently,

we were gushing over him and fall out and his uncle, Baby Billy, and then he was like, well, you've seen Justified. And then I felt like crazy that I hadn't. He said it in a way that was like, it was shameful if I hadn't seen it. Oh my God. I'm claiming to be a Goggins fan.

Okay, well. How about this, okay, now I'm gonna reverse the roles. Okay. Okay. Who is it? I don't think it can be a guy because it'll cloud it. So it's Jennifer Aniston. Okay. She's like, hey Monica, hi.

Hi, it's so nice to meet you. Oh my God, it's so nice to meet you. Jen Aniston. Yeah, I don't call myself that, but I know people call me that. So I just thought I would cut to, yeah. No, that's really funny. I don't know if this has gotten back to you at all,

but I love the podcast. What, are you serious? I mean, I get through Dax, but I'm really there for you. I think you're so wonderful. That is so flattering. Yeah, I listen to Race to 35. I listen to Sync. What?

Yeah, I look at your posts on Instagram. I bought Sergeant clothes because you wear them sometimes, Sergeant. Sergeant. Sergeant, yes, I'm sorry, I forgot. I'm hanging up. Wait, no, no, no, hold on, I'm not to my, the thrust of the skull.

I'm gonna, I would love to have you over for dinner. Do you wanna come up to the house and have dinner? I would love to. Great, I'm gonna wear something really slinky. Okay. You wanna wear something slinky? Sure. Okay, you're right, it sounds like you're a party.

Yeah, sure. What are you wearing? Do I need to wear like? I'm gonna wear a nightie. What color? A negligee. What color? Is there like a color code?

I have a beautiful blue one, it's kinda see-through. Ooh, that sounds cute. Is anyone else gonna be there? Or just us? Maybe a couple other people will stop by. Okay, cool. Yeah, what are you gonna wear? I don't know, maybe it's a good excuse

for me to go shopping. Oh, yeah, I know, I love that about you, because I like to shop too. Yeah, I'll probably buy something black. In fact, you've turned me on to quite a few brands. Argent, The Row, shockingly. I can't believe I didn't know about The Row.

I can't believe, oh my God, I bet you look so great in The Row. Oh, it's a little baggy, really, because kind of my calling cards, what a great bod I've got. So it feels like kind of a waste. You do have a great bod. You do, I've noticed.

I've been watching you on Instagram. Oh my God. Do you have the jelly shoes? Yes, Instagram. Oh my God. Do you have the jelly shoes? Yes, well. Oh my God. I got them because I was jealous of yours. Well, maybe you and I should both wear the jelly shoes too with our sling.

You're right, this sounds so much more fun. So I might be like, I might have the moral high ground in court, but you're definitely gonna be more fun and you're gonna fight it back more. So you kind of won. I'm gonna give you a victory for this whole thing. Thanks. Wow. Yeah, that really took a left curve It did it shocked me too. You you wish you had said sure I'll dress up. Yeah. Yeah. I got this great Bertoni I don't make it. I don't know

Hit me with a bit what Oh Dolce I have a great Dolce and Gabbana suit. Oh that sounds oh yeah It's been tailored. Oh, I can't wait to see that. Yeah, my shoulders look great in it, wait till you see. I can't wait to see that. Yeah, you can see the V in my back. Right. A little nonstop. I have some coaching to do.

Yeah, you didn't start telling her that you're gonna look better than her at this dinner. No, you can't do that. Oh yeah, I'll come to you, I'm gonna look way better than you at this dinner. Oh my God. Wow. Anyway my God. Wow. Anyway.

Okay. Okay. Speaking of our good and bad qualities. Yeah. I texted your mom. Oh. And asked her your exact location and time of birth. I can guess what she said.

But I need you to download something. Download something? An app. I can't. Please, it's a fur fact. I gotta fuckin' get an app. Oh no, see, here we are. I gotta get an app to make you happy?

Dax, come on. Okay, I'll do it, I'm doin' it. It's for our job. Co-star, co-star. Co-star astrology? Yeah, I'm doing it. It's for our job. Co-star, co-star. Co-star astrology? Yeah, I've been wanting to do this for so long. This is feeling bad luck to have this on. This is playing with the dark arts

to have this on my phone. No, I have it, and everything's great. I think, does this happen to you that, I think my face is changing enough that my facial recognition is working less and less and less, and I'm wondering if it's time to re. Oh my God.

Yeah. Okay. Co-. Yeah. Okay. Ghost hour personalized. Okay, get started. Yeah, get started. Okay, what is your birth date? January two. What time were you born, 12 58 a.m.?

No, 1 10 a.m. 1 10, okay, I was close. Okay, 1 10 a.m. city. Ypsilanti? It says Wayne, Michigan. Wayne County. Oh wow, there's a Wayne County in Georgia. Oh.

There we go, Wayne County. It just says Wayne, Michigan. Okay, not Wayne County. Uh-uh. Let me go back, let me see here. I thought I was born in Ypsilanti. Good thing we're doing this. You're born at 33155 Annapolis Street, Wayne, Michigan.

Okay. Well, I've lied on a lot of passport forms and- Oh my God, our visa. Yeah, yeah, I'm surprised. Well, maybe that's why I was getting so much heat. Oh yeah. They did not want me in there. Full grown adult since age six.

The responsible friend motivated- Oh, it's already worked? Yeah. Okay, the whole point of this is I wanna know your moon and rising. We know you're a Capricorn. It wants my phone number, no way. Oh, just put mine.

The phone number should not affect the moon. User name. Let me just do my email. Six characters, set a password, okay. This is laborious. It's gonna be really worth it. Because there's a lot we don't know about you. We're gonna find it all out.

Enter the code we texted you. That's you. Okay. Anytime I wanna use this app, I'm gonna have to call you. 225450. 225450. this guy, okay. What day at a glance?

What do you want me to do now? Okay. By the way, there's these, I read in New York Times about this. There's certain apps that are tracking how fast you drive. Oh my God. And selling that to insurance providers.

That has to be illegal. You would think, but it's not because you consent to this weird thing and the long thing. I didn't have any of those apps on there, but I might have to get rid of this app after this in case it tracks my speed because it would make my insurance really hard. Good afternoon, 68, blah, blah, blah.

So you're saying, oh, you, okay, I see you. Okay, now at the top. True love is terrifying. No. That's not a great thing to read, right, when you. Okay, yeah. Power in routine and sex in love. Pressure in spirituality.

Ooh. Trouble with thinking and love, pressure and spirituality. Ooh. Trouble with thinking and creativity, no. Okay, listen, go to the top, tippy top, tippy top. Okay. Where it says depths. Chart. Yeah, go to your chart. Chart, okay, I'm at my chart. It'll say sun in Capricorn.

Yep, sun in Capricorn. Now what's your moon in? Moon in Virgo. Oh! What does that mean? What does that mean? So is mine. Your moon is in Virgo?

I have a double. But your sun is in, your sun is in Virgo. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. Fascinating, so your moon is the planet or house or something that. Oh. That rules your emotions. Okay, the moon rules your emotions? The moon rules your emotions, moods and feelings. Okay.

We have the same. Oh, that sounds potentially explosive because we'll both be having like bad days at the same time or feeling sensitive at the same time, right? Not necessarily, but it's just, okay. On the flip side, we'll both be very happy at the same time.

So I guess the highs will be higher and the lows will be lower. I don't think it really works like that. No. It's just, it says, this is the likely sign you most think of yourself as, since it reflects your personality when you're alone or deeply comfortable Your moon is in Virgo meaning your emotional self is analytical responsible and pacifying a bundle of nerves You struggle with the need to be pure that may come out of self-sacrificing or nitpicky tendencies

It's in your fifth house meaning you find security and safety through romance self-expression creativity and pleasure Okay. Now, what's your ascendant? to find security and safety through romance, self-expression, creativity, and pleasure. Okay, now what's your ascendant? Libra. Wow, read what it says. Your ascendant is the mask you present to people. It can be seen in your personal style and how you come off to people when you first meet. Some say it becomes less relevant as you get older.

It changes every two hours. So if it doesn't make sense, reconfirm your birth time to be sure. You're, mm. Oh, because it's every two hours if you're a couple hours off. Oh, your ascendant is, oh, they're explaining the mechanics, the voodoo of it.

Okay, your ascendant is in, oh, they're explaining the mechanics, the voodoo of it. Okay, your ascendant is in Libra, meaning you come across as compromising, courteous, and fair-minded. Oh, you said courteous. I don't come across as compromising. Though sometimes passive-aggressive. No, I'm pretty directly aggressive. I'm never passive-aggressive.

Okay, keep going. Okay, you going. Okay. You seem inclined towards balance in all forms. Sorry, no. Well. I'm the least. No, this is not who you are. It's who you present.

That's the whole point. It's like the mask you wear in the world. So it's not who you are. You do come across balanced, even though you're not. Yeah. Yeah. Balance in all forms, aesthetic, romantic, and judgment. Yeah, I see a lot of that.

Okay. Wow, I'm so glad we finally answered all these riddles about me through this app. It's been haunting me. Yeah, I bet it's very comforting. Yeah, I learned so much. Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh and have been wondering for a long time what your moon and rising were. Do you think it's interesting that's like, first you're a Capricorn,

and then like, well let's add a whole other thing now. Let's say you also have a moon, just really quick. Okay. So now we're gonna give you this other thing, okay. So that means you now have two of the 12 options. Well, in different, doing different things though. Like if you want to. Like my Venus or my, what am I, Virgo.

So Virgo's interacting differently with Capricorn than it's interacting with Virgo? Well, your emotional life. Like if your emotions were Capricorn, you'd be different. Does that make sense? Not totally. If your emotions were Capricorn, you'd be different. Does that make sense? Not totally. So is it when the sun's out you're one way? No, no, no.

I just don't know how emotions could be deducted from one of the other arenas. We have lots of parts of life that are. That are free of emotion? Well. I don't think there's any. The way we, yeah. Lots of stuff. Yeah, okay.

All right. I don't know that much about it. My emotions are. Okay. My emotions are never offline to my knowledge is all I'm saying. Oh, I posted our video. Can you accept collab on that?

Oh, sure, sure, sure. People are writing in. Oh good, did you see anything interesting? Well, somebody said since I like it so much, we should have an astrology expert on. Oh yeah, I'm sure I could get through that. This has been fun. It's fun, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like we wouldn't, it's tricky. Can we acknowledge it's a little bit tricky? Yeah, but if we're having. Because we wouldn't have like, I wouldn't have divinist, is that what they're calling? A water diviner on? Like I wouldn't have someone preaching pseudoscience

that I just really don't think it's true. Right. So this is an interesting zone because I don't think it's true, but I guess I would do it. Yeah, because it's interesting. It's fun. It's fun.

Yeah, water divination is not that fun. Can we find one with a really fun personality? Yeah. I'm sure there's a lot. People that are in astrology seem to be really fun. They're probably in Aries. Okay. The name of the ferry going to Martha's Vineyard,

is it Island Queen Ferry? No. Well. It says there are several ferries that go to Martha's Vineyard. What's the one that leaves out of Woods Hole? Ferry that leaves out of Woods Hole. Oh, Stream Ship Authority.

There you go. I didn't really look at the name of the boat. Steam Ship, I'm sorry. Steam Ship Authority. Steam Ship Authority. Ferdy from Woods, wow. I know we can't. I can't talk.

I just said Ferdy from Woods. Steam Ship Authority is the ferry that runs year round from Woods Hole. It's such a fun ride. It's really beautiful. I bet. The enchantment starts on that ferry ride. Yeah, you feel like you're going to another world

and you are. Yeah. Okay. Rihanna was paid six million to perform at the wedding. Okay. Rihanna. Rihanna was paid six million. You're the one that taught me that. I know, I know. Rihanna was paid six million. Oh my God, months for the wedding. Okay, Rihanna. Rihanna was paid six months. You're the one that taught me that.

I know, I know. Rihanna was paid six months. Oh my God, there's a- For the Indian wedding? Yeah. There was such a fun video on her Instagram this week of her and ASAP Rocky, and she's being so playful. And he's just standing there looking at her

as she's dancing, and it's very funny. And he's acting over it? Yeah. No, I liked it for them. Yeah, sure, sure. It worked for them. But there are these relationships that are, I'm not saying theirs is like that,

I didn't even see the video, but there is some people like that kind of disapproval, like aloof, they like a partner and they said aloof. Right, it's a trope, but it was a good video. Okay, well, I'll try to add it to the, do I have to download an app or? It's on CoStar. Okay, you said we've been recording for six and a half years

and friends for eight years. We've been friends for longer than eight years. Because Delta's nine and a half. And I started date night babysitting before she was born. About 10 years. 10 years. Just want you to get that right. All right, we don't have time for this

because we spent so much time on the hypothetical. Yeah. But I listened to the Taylor Swift episode of Acquired in which they get into the business of her, but also the music industry business. And it's fascinating. And you just yawned, and that's a ding ding ding because you yawned in this episode twice. Oh, right, and she was upset.

Yeah, she didn't love that. They get in the music industry and how all that works and streaming and the amount that artists really make. It's crazy. I was gonna go back and, exactly. Yeah, you got to billions of downloads before you're making millions of dollars. Yeah, and I was gonna go back and listen

and write it up in a succinct way, but I didn't have time, because it's long. So I might still try to do that for another one of our fact checks, so stay tuned, but also you should listen, it's really interesting. Did it talk about, because I think a lot of the time these platforms get a lot of hate for what they pay the artists,

but it has been pointed out to me by someone who knows the business very well that that's a complaint with their label. It's a mix, it's so complicated. Yeah, but the label determines what they're gonna accept for a stream. They do, because they own it. But.

They could technically not go on the platform, but at this point, they're kind of forced to accept whatever that is. If you are, Radiohead was refusing to go on Spotify for a while. But also it's split. I wonder how it compares though to what, the tricky thing is, is it's very complicated because you would hear it on the radio for free.

And I don't think they made shit when it was on the radio. The royalty that a radio station played was non-consequential. Except the songwriter made a lot of money. It's broken up into two. From the radio? Yes. I think radio's exposure is. And to buy the CDs.

Yes, that's my point. So there was a paradigm where you were happy to give it away for free, i.e. the radio. Your royalty was bullshit. Because people would fall in love with the song, they'd go buy the CD, and then you'd make a lot of money on that. For the artist.

For the artist, yeah. Yeah, but for the songwriter, the radio was the way to make money. And then now it's not. And often, back then, the songwriter was not the singer, which then incentivized a lot of singers to write their own music so that they could get from both revenue streams.

It's very complex. But what I was gonna add is what's tricky is that by all accounts, Spotify, Pandora, Apple Music, that's now the radio. But there's zero need now to buy the physical product because you can listen to the song you wanna hear immediately. So yeah, created a very new and unique situation

that has not probably been dealt with ideally. Yeah, it has not. They don't make anything. It's crazy. Yes, and so I don't have a position on this. I'm not like, I'm not pro platform or anti-artists or any of that. But I do think the many people who are calling for the artists to get paid more,

they should also recognize that subscription is gonna be $60 a month. They have to be, we have to be required to pay. Exactly. So I think there's a lot of cheerleaders for it that they think these streamers are keeping a bunch of money. It's only $12 a month for these fucking streamers. They're not gonna be able to pay.

You're listening to 1,000 songs a month and you're paying 12 and you're the one with the moral high ground. I think that's the part maybe I'm bristling at, is there's a lot of criticism, but none of these people that are angry are gonna pay $60 a month for these streaming services. Well, they might if that's the only option to have music.

Most people can't afford to add $60 a month. If it was required, I don't think it would be $60 a month. Well, if you wanted to pay these people the royalty that everyone wants, you just have to break it down into how many songs you're listening to a month. I'll go back, I'll get the stats and stuff. It was very interesting,

but Taylor makes a couple million dollars, Taylor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I know. They don't make money out of streaming. They're only building popularity so they can go on tour and make their money on tour and on merchandise. And a lot of people that, like, you know, Megan is like, I have kids, I haven't been on tour in seven years.

She can't make any money. It's crazy. Yeah, I do think, though, that people have this idea that these streamers are making a ton of money at the expense of the artist. And I'm just saying, none of these companies are even profitable. Spotify had their first profitable quarter recently.

Like that's crazy. So for it to be $12.99 a month, there's no profit. So I'm just pointing out that if people want that, that's cool, I'm happy to pay that, but I have a lot of money. Yeah. Maybe it'll drive everyone back to the radio. Maybe.

And I gotta wait like an hour to hear my new favorite song. You wanna hear my new favorite song? Sure. Okay. Hannah, she's a great source of fun new music. She of course is a musician herself and she has her ear to the street. This is, got my eyes are bad. Remy Wolf it's

called Cinderella and it is so fun. I was driving the motorhome by myself through the desert with the song cranked. Oh wow. It's a jam, right? That's great. Yeah. I have a new song too. Oh, play it. Everyone knows it by now.

It's very popular. Oh, is that a bummer?. Oh, play it. Everyone knows it by now, it's very popular. Oh, is that a bummer? Well, no. Okay. I'm happy for her. But, we'll do this one. I mean, I like so many songs on this. I love them.

["My Friend's Song"] The whole album is so inside. Very very inside. Do you know it Rob? That you bang on your couch I thought, you thought I'd be better So long, you couldn't lose You said, we're not together So now when we kiss, I finger-shoot You said, baby, no attachment

But we're, Deep in the passenger seat and you're in the hours It's casual now Two weeks and your mom invites me to her house in Long Beach It's casual now I know what you tell your friends It's casual, It's casual now. That's a complicated song for me as a listener. Why?

Because she's unhappy with the arrangement and also she's saying like, eat me out in the front seat of the car. I'm like, that sounds great. And also banging me on the couch. I'm like, that sounds great, but she's unhappy with that. So it's really conflicting emotions, you know?

Those things sound fun, really. Yeah, they sound really fun, those things, but then they're not fun for her. Well, it's complicated. It is, and it's, what was the word? Prosaic. No, well that's a great word. No, she said it's casual.

It's casual. Casual, yeah. It's the same songwriter, producer that does all of Olivia Rodrigo. Yeah, I know. I've done a deep dive. She's very popular now. Her name's Chappell Rhone.

Everyone knows her. Deep dive again. We're on it. We're a mess for some reason. But the whole album's so good, and it's very hot right now. It reminds me of PJ. Harvey? Yeah, PJ Harvey.

There's kind of a PJ Harvey. Me, I might like PJ Harvey if you're on this. I like Chappell. Oh, okay. She's at the Greeks soon, PJ Harvey. Oh, she is. Yeah, eating out in the front seat of the car, that sounds like a good time.

Yeah. But it's not working out of the car, that sounds like a good time. Yeah. But it's not working out for us, so it sounds pretty bad. All right. Say bye. I love you. Thank you. Thank you.