Asmongold TV - I Played More Oblivion (it's honestly incredible) | Asmongold TV

Episode Date: September 21, 2025

I Played More Oblivion (it's honestly incredible) Asmongold show for all of his stream highlights, competitions, reactions & more. -------------- --------- Keywords: game reviews, gaming community, mmo gaming, gaming culture, reaction videos Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right. All right. Hopefully we're going to make some progress today. All right. Let's get this started. I don't want to f***ing around too much. Let's just start playing. Okay, so I just had to kill that, what do you call it?

I had to kill that wisp in order to talk to the shrine thing. And now I need to go to the fucking mine. Okay. This is the vampire mine. Okay. Where do the birds? There are any birds? Popcorn? I'm not gonna...

Why? I'm gonna be fucking fine. Don't worry about me. Everybody thinking I'm gonna get God. That's impossible. It can't even happen. We gotta go up here. Assassin's Creed remake like this could save Ubisoft. Remakes can't save a developer.

They just can't. Like, remakes are great, but it's not like this remake is gonna make me think that... Like, this remake makes me more confident in the new Elder Scrolls, but it's not like I'm going to think that now it's going to be amazing, right? Oh shit. Oh shit.

It is. So my gear's broken. Why is my gear broken? My helmet's broken? Do I have another helmet? I don't. I'm going to loot a helmet inside of there. That's okay.

Actually, why not just repair it? I can just repair it. What's it called? Repair hammer? R. Should be right here. Yeah, there we go. Okay.

And helmet. Perfect. Okay, now we're good. Wood door to the gutted mine. It's time. Nobody? Nobody. By Eastmears beard, we've got ourselves a live one.

Why is this been... Wait, what? Holy shit. Bro, why she got so much help? Pollyphoric hemophilia. What the fuck is that? Okay. Okay.

Bro, this bitch has so much health. This is insane. This is actually getting hard. Give me a minute. Give me a minute. Your apparel is about to break. Okay, she's almost dead. Got it. Holy fuck, this bitch was hard to kill. God damn. Jesus.

Dagger of wariness. Okay, I'm gonna have... Dude Let me heal Huh? Nothing to worry about, I guess Just my eyes playing tricks on me Whatever it was, it's gone now

Hello, who's there? Yes, it was nothing. Showing your face was the last mistake you will ever make. Fuck! Damn, she took a lot of damage. Why did she die so fast, but the other one didn't? I wonder, that was no big deal. What's in the coffin?

No shield? Oh, okay. Nothing good in there either. Silver vein. Oh, wow. I didn't even know you could get those. Okay. This is where I came from.

That's right. Damn, this bitch has a lot of health. Oh, my God. I got to run. I got to run. Yeah. Shit. I got a heal?

Let me double heal. I'd use a potion I have to use a potion I have to use a potion Uh, where are they? Potion of healing Okay, we're good, we're good, we're good, we're good All right, that's one, that's one

Yeah, I've brought mud crabs more fearsome than you Okay, got to be really careful now This is the part for you fall down and bleed to death Yeah Shit! Shit! I'm fucking dying. I'm fucking dying. This bitch is crazy.

This is the part for you falls out and bleed to death. Oh my god, I'm still fucking dead. Oh my god, I'm so fucking dead. Okay, um... I got one more healing potion. I've got one more healing potion. It's fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. Calm down. I have to stamina.

I have to stamina. I have the stamina. I have to stamina. It's over. It's over. It's not over. Nothing is over. It's over. Holy shit. Oh my god. Play more of numbling. What is that? Frost damage on strike. That's actually pretty good.

I think we're gonna use that. Holy fuck, man. Eat some food? What does food even do? It heals you? Okay. Jesus, that was fucking brutal, man. Oh my god. Wait, all my gear is broken. What? This is insane.

Okay. Give me a minute. I need another repair hammer. I gotta go all the way with this. I'm above cucumbered. Just a minute. I have to un-cucumber myself. Um, what do I want to get? get rid of. Ah, Jesus. I think we're going to get rid of this. And we're going to replace it with

the katana, the new one, because I don't really even need this anymore. So I'm just going to drop it. Because we have a new weapon anyway. Is this a new area? It is. Okay. Oh, I got another potion of respite. Save. Oh, you're right. You're right. Save. What's this thing on my character? Character? Factions? Details. Where's my debuffs? What's this debuff?

Where do I find my debuffs? Heal minor wounds. Oh, that's good. Okay. Active effects. Last tab. Drain fatigue, fire shield, resist frost. This is really good.

Rock wall. The wall will not wall. Okay. All right. was literally just there. What? Huh? Oh shit. Oh no. No. Oh fuck! You're all the same. Bro, I killed him in one hit. What do you mean humans?

Never take me down. Jesus Christ. I have to go back to the sword and shield. I'm healing. I'm healing. I can't heal. I'm really bad, guys. This is really bad. This is really bad. Jesus. Jesus. I've got to play it super safe, gentlemen.

I have to be super, super, super safe. No mistakes. Literally zero fucking mistakes. It says my apparel was broken. I can't go through this. Why not? Why not? Why not?

I can't. Jesus. Jesus. I did it. I fucking did it. All right. That's what I'm fucking talking about. Let's go.

All right. I'm above cucumber. Give me a minute. Okay. Let's see what we're going to get rid of the blade shield, the Legion shield. I think we're going to just get rid of the Legion shield for now. And I can use the Steel Greaves also.

The Steel Curry ass maybe instead. A lot of my stuff is almost broken, man. This is really bad. Okay, let's look down here. Wait, didn't I go down here? I didn't. Oh, repair hammer. We need that.

Tossa Dawn Road? I don't know what that is. Dude, this was no joke. Like, those mobs, like one guy, I kill in one hit. The other guy, I can't barely... Like, I've got to fucking terrain exploit that guy. Ooh, what's this? Oh.

God, I knew it. Okay, gauntlets of the Ford. Holy shit, that's really good. That's insanely fucking good. Fortify armorer on self. Well, we're gonna get rid of this other piece of shit. We don't need this at all. Okay, now we're going back.

That was insane, man. You're a parakeeer much better now? I better be. I need that. Jesus, these guys were insane. Like, this whole area was... Okay, I know where I am. So I have to go this way now, right?

And then it's this way. I think up to the top. Yeah. Yeah, this bitch was crazy. I could barely even beat one guy. That was scary. Sleep is for levels? I will. Oh my god.

That was a lot, guys. I barely survived. You must cure your vampirism. What? What? I'm not vampiric. It's not on there. It's not even.

true. You're a fucking idiot. Okay, anyway. Let's keep going. You're going to avoid those wisps. We don't want to have to deal with those. Okay. I have returned.

What is your wish? You who has been blessed by our lady's voice. Oh, you know what? Actually, I don't know what I need to do. Uh, quests. Azura? I should return to the shrine.

Okay. Hello? Thank you, mortal. Their spirits are free. And henceforth above my shrine, five bright candles shall burn forever in memory of their sacrifice. Yeah.

For your service, take this token that your deeds might be entered in the book of fate. Azura, thank me for allowing our followers' peace and death. You're rewarded me with Azura's Star. Which Martin needs a ritual to open a portal to Cameron's Paradise.

I should bring it to them at Cloud Rural Temple. Okay, let's go to Cloud Ruler Temple. And I will sleep while I'm there so I can level up. That's smart. Okay. I'm only level five. Um, maybe it's over here. I don't know where the beds are.

I guess we're going to find out. It seems like the beds should be here, right? Good evening, sir. Yeah. Oh, fuck. I can't sleep there. Um... Hmm. Let's see. Maybe here? No, I can't sleep here either. Lower floor?

Okay. Oh, I think I know what you're saying. The lower one in here. Okay, I got it. Yeah, down here. Okay, I'm gonna sleep for one hour. I have ascended to level 16. Strength, endurance, fast. All right, we are good. Okay, and I'll make sure there's nothing else over here that I need. It looks like there's not. Okay, great. I can't believe I got an item and it's worth $1,000. That is insane. Okay, let's go talk to Martin now.

Yes. The next section of the Mysterium Xerxes is very difficult. I haven't deciphered the rest of the ritual yet. I hope you are making better progress. Dajric artifact? I won't ask what he went through to obtain this, my friend. I know all too well the depravity of the princes of oblivion. Yeah.

Are you ready to give me the artifact? Remember, the ritual will consume its physical form. It won't be seen again on Tamriel for many years. I am ready. Ah, as you're a star. As beautiful as all the tales tell. I am ready. Delivered the Dajerk Outer effect.

What can I do to help? You should talk to Geoffrey. He needs your help. Trouble down in Broomer, I think. Okay. I put aside the dark arts when I became a priest. Mm-hmm. But the workings of fate may be seen in this too.

The gods can turn anything to good. Or so I piously told those who came to see me for advice. Uh-huh. Perhaps I may yet come to believe it myself. Farewell, my friend. Uh-huh. That an oblivion gate has opened outside the city. Shit!

It seems that the mythic dawn are putting their plan to attack Bruma into motion. Since you've dealt with these gates before, I'd like you to help the Countess's guard close this gate. Once they've seen how it's done, they should be able to handle any new gates on their own. Where is the gate? Captain Bird is waiting for you outside the Bruma City gate. He'll show you the oblivion gate, although I doubt it will be hard to find. It'll probably be the one that's really big and red, right?

You should rendezvous with Captain Bird immediately. The sooner that gate is closed, the better. Okay, let us go. Good evening, sir. Good evening, sir. repair your stuff okay i will that's a great idea where do i do that yep yep yep yep okay just stop uh hammer or armor vendor okay is there a vendor in this area i think there should be right

yes okay good wait why is there blue around my sword does that mean that the enchanted effect only lasts for that period of time yes okay all right i'll only use it in serious situations then. Okay, let's find the armorer in here. So the armorer should be, this says hammer and axe. I don't think this is where you

repair. I'm just kidding. It obviously is I'm fucking around. You can recharge it, though? Oh, really? Jotrid. You need armor or weapons? Newer repair. Come to hammer and axe. All right. And let's repair.

If I can't fix it, it ain't broken. Wait, it's $162 to repair everything. Okay, give me a minute. Have a look at my wares. Let's start selling some stuff, okay? Um, we don't probably don't need both daggers. So we're going to haggle a little bit. We're going to go to like right here, okay?

Just a little bit. And I think we're going to get rid of this dagger. and then we're going to get rid of the silver dagger as well because I already have the dagger of embers as well and iron arrow we're going to get rid of that. And then for armor we already have the steel greaves so we don't need the Legion grieves anymore right?

Actually, I don't know which one is better. Common Soul Gym. Should I sell these? No? Okay. I just don't know like what's what's sellable and what's not. Like a bear pilt. Why would I need a bear pilt? Soul gems are for recharging? Okay.

Sell it? Okay. I could sell this stuff too. Like silver nuggets, but I could craft with it maybe too. I don't think I need a skull. I'm going to sell the skull. Sorry. Varla stone for $400.

Like, should I sell the varla stone? Varla recharges? Okay, I shouldn't do it. Why do you need the spoon? Oh, that's a good idea. Okay, same with the silver. I'm going to sell this too. Okay, all that's good.

And what else does this guy buy and sell? Okay, all this stuff pretty much sucks. So we don't want any of this. This is all garbage. This is super garbage. Mega garbage. Okay, so now... Come back and see me again.

And now let's go back and we're going to repair. For the right price I can make any. This is so expensive, man. $162 to repair that. That is so stupid. This is so much money. Okay, let's do this one. You guys want me to repair, I will.

Okay, everything's repaired. Okay. Goodbye. All right, I have eight hammers. I should be fine. Wait, do I? Six. Yeah, I have six hammers.

It's fine. Okay, we have to go talk to the captain now. What is it now? Okay, who's this guy? What does he want? Look at the muscles on you. Thanks for coming. Since we had the hero of Kavach available,

I didn't think it made sense to try this on our own the first time. We're ready when you are. Just say the word and we'll follow you into that hell spawned gate. Let's go. Let's go. Give me a minute to talk to the men. Everyone's a bit jumpy right now. What are your pronouns?

Boys, listen up. We've got to close that gate over there. Nobody likes the idea of going into that thing, but it's our job, and we're going to do it. If we don't, Bruma ends up a smoking pile of rubble like what happened at Kavach. And that's not going to happen here, not while I'm captain of the guard. Boor, Soran, you're with me. The rest of you, stay outside and kill anything that comes out of that gate. Let's show these bastards how we do things in Bruma. Damn right. So far. All right.

Let's go. Here comes another one. Let me go ahead. I'm going to put on my normal sword. I don't want to use my special one. Oblivion Glade. Let's do it. We're going into the shadow realm.

So far, so good. All right, boys. How are we doing? This is no place I ever wanted to find myself I don't see how we can No no we can do this we have to do this we have no choice Glad you're here. We wouldn't have a chance otherwise. What's our next move? Follow me. We'll follow your lead so far. Let's go

I've got that shit What's up bitch get out of here? I've got that one Got him. That's one down. Got him. Ho's mad. Good job, gentlemen. We fight our way through. Oh, shit.

We got to watch out for that. Wait, my apparel's broken again? What? Where's my hammer? I can't repair. I can't repair. I'm on your side. Bro, it's my bad. My bad.

This oblivion place really seems like a shithole to me. No wonder they want to. to leave this place sucks here now oh you're right you're right you're right easy double hammer i've got that one do it see what happens oh one shot them okay all right let's keep moving here comes another one who yeah wait what what the hell with my arrows son of a bitch All right, all right, let's go, let's go. We got to run through it. It's a gauntlet.

There it is, there it is, big dick. Let's keep going. He one tapped him too. That was impressive. Look out. All right, kill this guy next. Nice. All right, let's keep moving.

Look out. Easy enough. Got him. vampire, like this compared to those vampires was nothing, man. It's a demon lord. Not anymore. It's a demon bitch. Okay, we killed him.

That was easy. Am I still on expert mode? I'm on adept. Expert felt tedious. It just made everything take longer. It didn't really make the game harder. It just made it longer. Like, if I played through the game with expert mode,

I could do it or even like on master it would just make things take longer. It doesn't add in any new mechanics. It doesn't do... Ooh, ooh, oh. Wait, is this who I think it is? Oh shit, it's a cock sucker. Okay, we gotta get these guys. I didn't realize we had a cock sucker over here.

Let's go this one. We have to go into that castle. Oh shit. Oh shit. Cat if? What the hell is a cat if? Okay, good. He's dead. It doesn't even matter. You pathetic worm. Alright, great.

And now it's time. Oh, what's this? Magic essence. Oh shit. I'm going. He's gonna mix that 600 gold. Wait, what? 600 gold?

Fucking retard. What are you talking about? 600 gold staff previous corpse? No. What? How did I not see that? Holy shit. You guys almost let me miss that. Okay.

Oh shit. It's time. So far, so good. I've got that one. That guy just got dicked. Like, what's the plan, sir? It's whatever the fuck I say it is. We'll follow your lead.

Okay. I'm not going to make that mistake again. All right. Stay sharp. Yeah. Stay sharp. We got some silver nuggies, too. Oh, I'm over cucumber.

Give me a minute. What do I want to get rid of now? Let's think about getting... I'm going to put it on the Kabatch, Curious. I'm going to get rid of this. And the greaves are going to put... Oh, I actually... You know what?

I'm just going to keep these on. Yeah, we don't need that. All right. Let's look around. There's two pathways. Let's take this one. The rending halls. So far, so good.

Yes. Okay, he's dead. Shit. Got him. All right. We've got another one of their hearts. So good. I can just start selling their hearts pretty soon.

Oh, this is like a best. A special box. Grieves of the flame. Oh, fuck. And I can get rid of my. steel grieves and use those. I will whenever I run out of in-intorty space. Nope. Okay. That's all my stuff. Is this it? Oh no, it's not. Okay. It's mistake. Damn. Damn. And I can reflect spells with that shit.

So far so good. Oh my god. So far so good. So far so good. Save? You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. Quick saving. Wait, there's nothing up here, right? Oh, there is. There is, there is. Boredorbs to the dark Salbotian. So far, so good.

Yes. I've got that one. Fucking bitch. Nothing good in that one. Ooh. That looks really fucking cool. Vamps are way harder. Yeah.

This is an easy area. Stay sharp. Oops. Okay, got him. Anything big here? No, nothing. All right. Let me go down this way and see if I, if there's another one of those chests, man.

Like, that's a $4,000 item. Stay sharp. That's insane. I got a repair hammer. That's actually really good. I'm happy. I know where that leads us, so we're not going to go there. We'll go back up to the top now.

It's time. To the Fury spike. Dramura Claybor. 13. 13. Holy shit. What else do we not need? We don't really need the old Claymore anymore at all.

This one is fucking crazy. I still don't have enough space. Is there anything stupid that I'm holding on to? I have a cheese. We, I still don't have these cloth. We don't need cloth. I have all these daydric hearts. That's what's holding me down.

Sort by weight. Smart. We don't need any bones. Um, I don't need this anymore either. I don't need this. I have 37 rat meats. Now I have zero. Okay, let's go. And we search the sigil keeper. We got everything. Dramora Krinivir's shield. Uh, is that any good? I feel like it's not as good as what I had, so we're just not even going to use it. Okay, and this is the guy that we killed. And, oh, no wonder he died.

His armor sucks. No, I don't have the money. I don't have the space, bro. Like, I, I can't, I can't hold it. All right, I've opened the door to the sigil key. Bird and I have reached the sigil stone chamber. Now to close the gate. We've got to get out of here.

Here comes another one. Shit. Got him. Blood fountain, I don't really need that. We will go up to the top now. Huh? Who's this asshole? Oh shit

All right All right We're gonna bring out the big boy Bring it out the big boy Oh yeah Oh yeah Get the fuck out in here Biddle

I didn't mean to do that That wasn't I did not mean to do that to him at all Actually he has a healing post I did need to do that. But I actually didn't. And everybody knows it.

That was really bad. He broke the law. Did he? Of course he did. Long mantle of diminishing. It's only, well, I mean, that's kind of a lot. I mean, 24. I just don't have to wait for it.

That's the problem. Like, I want to use it. I can't hold on to it. It's time. Release the power. Yes Yes It's done

Captain Bird Here comes another one Bloody soul straight to Sutherland We got a few stragglers I caught metal crab More fearsome than you Okay let me loot his friends

Before I talk to him Uh Columbine root pulp What the hell You did it captain You closed the oblivion gate Believe me it was no picnic But thanks to our friend here

I now know we can close these hellgates. Yes. We can defend Bruma. Yes. All right, we need to start selling some shit. How do you guys feel about that? We start selling some stuff right now? Oh, I forgot to talk to him.

I'm dumb. It was an honor to serve with you, sir. Now that I've seen how it's done, I think my guardsman and I can handle any new gates that open near Bruma. That's right. What the hell do I do now? Oh, I got to go back up to our bar. place. Okay, well, let's sell some stuff. I need to find a place to put all my shit. Where do I put all my shit?

You violated the law. Since you lack the funds to pay the court, you must serve out your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit. I can't beat them. Because then, why, this is... Serve your time peaceably and pay your debt to society. I murdered an innocent man. I didn't murder him. He was in the way of my sword. All of your confiscations have been possessed. Hey. Go away. What the hell do I do now? Go to sleep to serve your sentence?

Do you want to serve your time? Yes. Wait, what the fuck I lost my points? What the fuck is this? What the fuck is this? This is bullshit, man. What a fucking piece of shit game. I gotta get everything back now. I didn't lose a level, did I?

No, I'm still level 6. I'm fine. I can't go in there now. Okay, let's go back up this way. You can just reload. It won't matter. I'd have to redo everything whenever I killed that guy. Also, I'm going to be honest.

I think that save scumming is not as interesting for people to watch as me just playing it on my own. So, like, that's also another reason. right? It's like it makes it more interesting. Oh, oops. I know it might sound silly, right? But like, I think that's true. Okay. I've got all my gear back on. It's fine.

It's not a big deal. It's more fun when the accidents happen? Yeah, yeah. You only lose a little bit of progress? Yeah, no, it's okay. It's, remember, like, I play games like this, you know, obviously, like, for my own fun, but if I'm doing it on stream,

I'm going to try to make it interesting, right? Yeah, it's content. Exactly. Are you shocked with how good oblivion is? Yeah. I don't like how the accidental hits, you know, do that. That's okay. I mean, that's just what happens, right?

Sir. What can I do for you, sir? Okay. I think I need to go talk to. Do you want to talk to again? To Joffrey. And your eyes open. That's all baldy, by the way.

Good evening, sir. Is that Joffery? That's Martin. He must be in here. He's usually in here. Hale. Oh, shit. I didn't know he's in there.

That was him? Was it? Ah, there you are. We need to talk. Who? Of course. What troubles you? I can't stop thinking about...

That's Pegasus. About the emperor. We failed. We failed because we got... This has been a concern of mine... Have you helped Captain Bird and his men close the oblivion gate yet? Yes. Yes.

Good work. Captain Byrd and his guardsmen should be able to handle any additional gates, at least for now. But the Bruma Guard cannot defend the city indefinitely. The danger of oblivion are innumerable. The guardsmen of Bruma are not. We need to gather what allies we can before Bruma is hopelessly besieged. All right. If the mythic dawn manages to open a great gate here, the city will need a stronger garrison for there to be any hope of defending it. Okay. You should speak to the rulers of the other cities of Siridil, as well as the elder council. Ask them to send aid to Bruma before it is too late. Done. What else can I do to help?

Martin made some progress on the Mysterium's axes while you were gone. You should speak to him about it. Okay. You should speak to the rulers of Syriville. I comrade with best stay sharp. Who knows what tomorrow brings? I will do that. Actually, let me see how long they sleep for.

I don't know. Sir. Is Martin still asleep? No, he's awake. I figured out another item needed for the ritual to open the portal to Cameron's Paradise. Yeah? The second item is the counterpart to the first, the blood of a divine. This was a terrible puzzle to me.

Unlike the Deidre lords, the gods have no artifacts, and do not physically manifest themselves in our world. How then to obtain the blood of a god? But Geoffrey solved it. The blood of Tyber Septum himself, who became one of the divines. like one of his ancestors? This is a secret remembered only by the blades. Pass down from one grandmaster to the next.

Joffrey should tell it to you himself. Oh shit. Okay. Be sure to speak to Geoffrey about the armor of Tiber Septim. I'll continue my study of the Mysterium Xerxes. Okay. Where's Geoffrey? Where's the old baldy?

Good evening, sir. Where do he go? I always get confused. That's not old baldy. Maybe he's outside. He's probably outside. Oh, fuck. Okay.

Good morning, sir. Where the hell he is? Let's look around. We're going to find him. Hail. That's Bardagon. Maybe he's in here. This has got to be him, right?

That's Caroline. Who the fuck is Caroline? Good evening, sir. Hail. Okay, let's go up through here. Where the hell he is? Quest log? Oh, that's smart.

Activate quest. Sir. Where does it be? It said he's out here, but he's not out here. I'll be right back. Can he his bathroom? He entered inside? Okay.

Give me a second. Where the hell was it? I still can't find this fucking guy, man. Joffrey said he went to gavage? No, he didn't. Hail. Um, wrong quest. Blood of the divines.

Okay. So he should be in here. I thought I had already done that. Good evening, sir. Yeah, he's in here. That's Rolando. No, we... Oh, it must be the bottom.

Hail. Fuck, bro, he's running away from me. Okay, where is it? Good morning, sir. There, baldy, baldy. So, Martin wants you to recover the armor of Tiber Septim. I wish there was another way. The armor is in the shrine of Tiber Septim

in the catacombs beneath the ruins of Sankator, a holy place once. But Sankator became evil long ago. No one has returned from the shrine of Tiber Septim for many lifetimes. What evil works? I do not know. The catacombs of Sankator were sealed by the first grandmaster of the blades.

The four mightiest blades of Tiber Septim's Day, Elaine, Valdemar, Rilus, and Kassner went to Sanketor and never returned. Here, this is the key to Sankator's outer door. I fear I am sending you to your death, but we have no other choice. You must succeed. I will. An ancient relic of the first emperor who became the divine talus, the patron of our order. After the battle of Sankathor, Tiber Septim gave his armor to the blades in honor of our role in his victory. Damn.

The blades built a shrine in the catacombs of Sankatur on the spot where Tiber Septim received the blessing of Akatos. The armor has been there ever since. Before evil came to Sankatur, this shrine was a place of pilgrimage for all blades. But no one has visited the shepherds. shrine and live to tell the tale in centuries. Well, we got to go back over there and get it back. Keep your heart true and your eyes open. Where's this shit at?

Good evening. Actually, you know what I really need to do? Where the fuck do I put my shit? Sir. In that buy a house? How many is a house? How many is a house? 2,000?

Guys, I got 500. I could sell my shield and buy a house. Ah, geez, guys Spiral Tower Quest Wait, what? There's a quest? No, there's not. That's some bullshit. You get a free castle?

What? Where is it? North of Chorrel? Where the fuck is Choral? Not Choral? That's not Choral. Left of Choral. Okay, so it's over here.

So Fort Ass, is that it? Right here? Yes. Okay, let us go. No, this is really good. I've been waiting for this. Where's Mr. Horse?

There he is. Oh, fuck. Those are, like, bad. Those are, like, real bad. They got it? Yeah, I don't know how to get the horse armor either. I bought the Deluxe Edition, and I don't have the horse armor. I think I got cheated.

Remaster looks solid. Yeah, it's really good. Okay, let's go to the, Let's go to the town. Talk to the stable master. Oh, okay. Oh, what's this? I gotta kill this bird. Whoops, he ass. What's up bitch? What's up bitch ass? The fuck out of here. I had to take him out. That's just what you gotta do. No way. Wait, who the fuck is this dick sucker? Okay. You really want this? Why are you killing the horse?

The fuck out of here. Suck my dick. Anybody else? What about you? Sorry, no time to talk. I have to deliver these copies of the Black Horse Courier. Here, have one of the latest editions. Free as always.

What fuck? Okay, let me get back on Mr. Horse. I forgot about Mr. Horse. What weapon is that? The Dajric Claymore? Yes. Okay. So this is apparently my house.

I've never been here before, so I don't know what this is. Quest added. I hear battle noises as if the castle was being attacked. Make this my active quest. They're being attacked? Brother. Wait, hey, you son of a bitch! What's the fuck out of here?

All right, I can get any of that. Who's this? Marauder. That's a marauder. Maraud these nuts Got him GERRourn' Die,

GERRourn Okay Which one's the bad one? Do your worst Marrida word Got him Grieves of the flame again Oh, that's huge

Dwarving Currie ass Okay, now what? It should be fine, right? Like, it's on a big deal. We'll go inside. It's like, I'm about to get my house anyway, right? So it shouldn't matter. This is indeed a dark day for all of us left.

Yes. But I thank you for risking your own life to help us. Yes. Here, take this. It'll tell you all you need to know. As the newest master of the castle, I bid you welcome. Wait, I'm the master of the castle. That was it?

I'm the, I'm king of the castle. Holy shit. So can I just throw all my stuff on the floor and it's just there? Find a box? Okay, I'm gonna find a box. Am I going the right way? Um, should be this way, right? Left?

Okay, yeah, we're gonna go left. Private quarters. This is it. Gentlemen? We're bawling out now. Damn. Damn, this is me now. Okay, so do I just...

Where's the box? Where's my box? It's by the bed? Okay. I don't see it. I ain't seeing it. Where's it at? What's this?

Slow down. Shut the fuck up. All right, I'm going to drop something on the ground. Um, I can get these later. Okay, so where is it? Read the note. Note. Helvin's Will's Castle over the years.

What little fortunes have that available? I devote to Mantana Castle. So sadly it's coming to great cost. And many of the items within its walls had to be sold. Okay. Read that paragraph fully. It came to a great cost. And many of the items within its walls had to be sold to meet the enormous payments of such a maintenance.

If you find yourself within the means to restore a castle, a friend of my father's name Nelfast Morhan, still holds all those required is to repay the castle's debt. Well, that could be like a million dollars. I don't know how much that is. Mostly 2K a p... yeah, it's 20K. It's fucking insane. So I did all this for fucking nothing. Son of a bitch. And I... And there's not a single box in here?

Motherfucker. Okay. It's upstairs by the back. We're gonna look around. It's 2K for storage. Can I at least just put... Oh, maybe it's in here. Can I just put my stuff in? here and it doesn't despawn. Yes. Okay, so I can just throw everything on the ground.

Okay, that's fine. Why didn't you guys just tell me that? This is, yeah, this is my house. I live here. This is normal for me. Okay, we are gonna loot this and I think we're going to throw away. I think we're just gonna get rid of most of this stuff, right? I mean, like, I don't really need most of this, so it will despawn. Here's what we do. We drop these items. We go sell fucking everything. We come back.

We sell these items. Then we don't need to worry about it. I'm going to be... All right. Number one, I'm rich. Number two. And we're going to go... How do I...

How do I leave? I leave this one, right? No, it's east wing. I don't need that. Okay. It's this one. Yeah. So we're going to sell everything.

Where do the vendors? Where do the vendors? Maybe it's over here? No, that's not it. Imperial City. Imperial City Merchant District. Market District. Let's go there.

See, I never played this before. I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Okay. Good night. Stop talking. And... What is the quest I'm tracking right now? Oh, okay, so I have to go talk to this guy.

Okay, hello? Good. Allow me to extend my... Congratulations on your daring victory. I am at your service. I have everything you need to make the place more livable. Here, take this list. Only quality goods for sale here.

What can I interest you in? Oh, wow. What the fuck? So, which one do I do? I gotta do the bedroom? Good day. Okay, got it. I'm gonna try to barter with him.

Whatever you need. Okay, let's barter. Only quality goods for sale here. And we're going to haggle to here. And then we're going to start selling. Why doesn't you want to buy any of my shit? I'm just going to sell the curry ass. Your mercant.

Oh, I'm leveled up. Okay, good. And we already have one of these, so we don't need two. Let's just sell this now. A gold ring. I don't need that. That seems a fair price. Oh, I'm making big money now.

Oh, this is great. This is huge. for me. Okay, is there anything here I should like, like, I don't know like really if I'm going to use any of this shit. Like, sell the potions?

I don't know. I mean, like, I should probably sell the staff. But like, I don't have anything else that really does that does magic damage. So I kind of want to hold on to the staff. Should I sell this? I'm going to sell staff. A good price for a good customer.

I'm the good customer, by the way. A pleasure to serve you. Okay. Dramora Hearts. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you're right. I forgot all about them. I interest you in some of my fine wares.

Okay. Dremora Hearts. He wants them. He does. Dajra Hearts. $391. And I also need to, let me go sell my weapons, too. Look at the muscles.

What? Look at the muscles. Wait, what? Only quality goods for sale Okay, I've got to go sell this to the, to the vendor Um What? What? I ran into some goblins in the woods not long ago.

What is it, citizen? Shut up, bitch. I'm trying to find The best defense. Slash and smash. This is where I have to sell my weapons. It has to be, right? Herbal grow orcogue knows you need axes and blunt weapons

Yes Big ones Yes So he makes them and sells them here Yes Slash and smash the big ork weapons shop Big weapons for big heroes I like this guy

Can I interest you in some of my wares Okay all this stuff sucks I'm gonna go like right here And we're gonna sell Wait What about the items I had Wait, did I... Leave me alone.

Did I confuse myself? Oh, I need to go get them. That's right. They're in the castle. Yeah, let me go back to the castle. I have to go outside. That's okay. At least now we know what to do, right?

So it should be no big deal. Let's go back. Because, like, we sell those two items and we should have enough money to buy the box. Each race has its own set of special abilities and powers. Huh. But when I say that, I get bad. And let's go up here. It better still be here, guys.

Yes. All right. Now we're going back. Oh, I have to go outside. That's right. It desponds after days. Oh, yeah, I should sleep. That's smart.

This is a nice fucking bed, too. I'm going to sleep for 10 hours. You dream of someone sleeping peacefully in this bed when a shattery gaunt figure silently enters the room. Approaching the bed, the figure leans down and sinks its fangs into What the fuck? Sinks its fangs into the sleeping person. After a few moments, the pale figure rises, blood dripping down his chin,

as color flows back into the vampire's face, and his features fill out. You start to recognize the face as your own. You awakes screaming. What? I don't know what that was. Doesn't matter. Okay, let's see here.

Endurance. We're going to get more agility. All that seems good. Okay, great. Losely rather soundly. a murderer. That's good. You'll need a clear conscience for what I'm about to propose. Who are you? I am Lucian the Chance, a speaker for the Dark Brotherhood and you. You are a killer, taker of life, a harvester of souls. Your work, your deathcraft pleases the night mother.

And so I come to you with an authoring, an upper-pillar. to join our rather unique family. I'm listening. Then heed my words, for I will not repeat them. On the green road to the north of Braville lies the inn of Ill Omen. There you will find a man named Rufio. Kill him. And your initiation into the Dark Brotherhood will be complete.

Do this. and the next time you sleep in location I deem secure. I will reveal myself once more, bearing the love of your new family. Hey, yo, fuck, Rufio, yeah, true. All my homies hate Rufio. Excellent. Now please, accept this token from the Dark Brotherhood.

It is a virgin blade and thirsts for blood. May it serve. your endeavors well. Now, I bid you farewell. I do hope we'll meet again soon. Your path is clear. Send Rufio to his death and the dark brotherhood

will embrace you as family. Oh shit. Okay, well, I've got to go over to sell this, right? Let me go sell my stuff. Holy shit. What the fuck, man? Greetings to you. Travel.

Rupufio? Not yet. No, it's fine. You just joined the W.E.F. Is that true? Am I part of the Illuminati? Who will help an old better? Shut up, bitch. Oh, I gotta wait. Um, maybe 6 a.m., probably three hours. They gotta be open by 9 a.m., right?

Take this. It's from a friend. Wait, what? Finding the thieves? Wait, what the fuck? Finding the thieves guild What the hell? Go on Okay And I'm gonna barge off of the finest goods

And I'm gonna find Okay And I'm gonna sell these two items So we're gonna sell the claymore Uh yeah Yeah we sell the Claymore And We sell the Reveler maybe

That's just not reasonable Okay I'm gonna take it down to here Got it. Got it. Okay, great. So now we actually made progress. Stop talking. Okay.

So now what I need to do is I need to go talk to that guy. Oh fuck! Oh shit! I'm gonna loot him. I want to loot him. Die! Take that! Do your worst!

I do not fear. No, do not feed... Lou, woo, woo, woo, woo, loo... Damn, she got a hot. Oh, damn. This guy got fucked up. Silver arrow? Oh, wow.

Okay. Now we gotta go talk to this guy. The merchant's end. And we're gonna buy the bedroom thing. That's what we really need. Hello, whatever you need. So, by the way, I'm sure there's something to suit you.

This is what I buy. I buy bedroom. Is that correct? Yes. Done. Thank you for your patron. Take care. All right, not so bad. And now we need to go kill that guy. Let me see how this works.

So we're going to go back to Battle Thorn Castle. And I should be able to unlock my stuff. Okay. We're gonna put all of our stuff away right now And there should be a box Because this is the bed room Is this what I think it is? How can I be of service?

I'd like something to eat I'd love to oblige But we have no kitchen What the fuck? Wait, I bought this but I still don't have I still don't have a... Oh, oh here it is. Is this where I put all my stuff?

Can I put all my stuff in here? It's next. the bed. Okay. There's an area next to the bed. No, there's not. There's just not. Oh, this one. Okay. We're going to put everything in here. Okay. Uh, oh, wait. How do I F? Okay. Got it. All right. Um, let's see. We can put these away. Put that away. Keep the potions. I don't need any of this shit Miscellaneous Um

I don't know if I need this stuff or not I mean probably fucking not Like I don't even know what this shit is Store it Yeah this shit's heavy anyway So let's just get rid of it Gold Nuggets

And I'm gonna keep the keys in everything though obviously Same with that too Can I keep these Mythic Dawn common I don't need these anymore right I don't think I do. Okay, I think I've made a lot of space now, guys. Yeah, we've got a lot of space. I feel like we are totally fucking good.

What's my inventory now? Yeah, I have 200 space. That's a lot of space. Great. Okay. So, where's this cock sucker that I need to kill? A knife in the dark.

I must go to the end of ill omen. Where is he? That's not it Does it show it on here? I have to go down This is okay Let's go outside Yeah, I know, we're good

Rufio dies Rufio's gonna get his ass beat That's what's about to happen Okay Um, and now Let's go over here Alrighty We're gonna kill him real quick

Hmm Damn this area is really nice God damn. He's innocent? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I have to talk to the stablemaster. That's a good idea. Wait a minute.

We have to fix something, guys. Is this a stable master? What is it? If you are looking to... Um, no. Good day. Must be in... Nope.

I'm not going to worry about it. Let's just go. Welcome to Brat. Oh, wow. That's really nice. Okay, let's go this one. at the Imperial City? I didn't say that.

Okay. We're on our way now. Shame about that oblivion gate? Yeah, it's too bad, right? Damn, bitch. Damn, bitch. What the fuck? What's he starting up trouble for?

He'll be gonna die. Yeah, that's what? This is it. You smell funny? Yeah, true. Oh, Yeller. You know, I like playing game. You know what?

We need to find another one of those games to play that's like, uh, there was like a few of those like schizo, uh, fucking video games. I actually really like playing those. I think the only other one I was going to play recently was dokey, dokey literature club. Oh, oh, give me a minute. Hello? That's what I thought. That's a classic.

Yeah, I haven't played that at all. Wait, what the fuck? Oh, that's an oblivion gate. Oh, those are really bad, right? You know, there's like a certain point of the game where, like, because i'm like just going over here i'm just talk about this for a minute so the only other game like this that i really played from like heavy mastery armor okay um oh i'm level 50 armor that's really good um what was i said before oh yeah the only other game that i played like this ever before was um

dragons dogma one i played all the way through dragons dogma one beat the whole game and ever It was really fucking fun. Okay. It's the scene of the crime. Where's the dagger? The blade of woe. Nice dagger. You have my ear, citizen. Where is it? Do I do it? Do I kill him? Feed. Wait, how did I do that? Okay, well I'm gonna kill him now.

Alright, here we go. Ha ha ha! The man named Rufio is dead! bitch the eyes wait what about my eyes my eyes seem fine I'm good

that just looks like me normally okay now I've got to go back to sleep now they're not upset about the fact that I stabbed that guy in the face while he's asleep right like that's just the way it is wait oh oh right

right right um is there a bug oh I was confused for a minute there Okay, now we're gonna go back to town. Or back to our castle. All right. You can sleep there?

No, it's okay. I didn't know if you could or not. I assumed I had to go back to my castle. This came for you, sir. A note from Nilfus. What the fuck does Nilfus want? Where's this bitch ass? Uh, where'd it go?

I don't even see it. Go to Miscellaneous tab? Okay. Mysterious note. No, that's not it. No, that's not it either. There. I hope you're pleased to the region's purchase.

I might not be interested in an Ichin-Dwemer forge. Still in working condition. Okay, yeah, sure. Facilitate all your armor and weapon repairs. I know a person of your means and discrimination that would never balk at such a price, which barely covers my own expenses. How many money is this? Is it expensive?

2.5K? I'm broke, bro. Like, I can't buy anything right now. Okay. I gotta go to sleep. My boy. My boy. How do I know this?

You'll find that the Dark Brotherhood knows a great many things. For you are now part of the family. Now what? Now you embrace your fate. For the slaying of Rufio was the signing of a covenant. The manner of execution, your signature, Rufio's Blood, the Inc. As a speaker of the black hand, I directly oversee a particular group of family members. You will join that group and fulfill any contracts given.

You must now go to the city of Shadenhall, to the abandoned house near the eastern wall, enter the basement an attempt to open the black door you will be asked a question answer thusly sanguine my brother

you will gain entrance to the sanctuary once inside speak with Ochiva we must now take our leave of each other you and I for there is much work to be done I'll be following

your progress Welcome to the family Okay You are now one With the Dark Brotherhood Visit Oceiva At the Chadenhall Sanctuary

Damn, all right Your new life Will begin Okay Um Where the fuck is that? Oh, it's over here Okay, let's go over there

Oh, I can't leave Yeah, this is, um As I said, like I really didn't expect this to be a video game. Because I only played Wow for like 2006 like onward. So all of the good video games, I don't even know what they are. Yeah, I don't even know what good video games are at all. I have no idea. This is a good one, yeah.

Okay, let's go this one. Boarded up door to an abandoned house. I got this. I'm gonna do it myself. I did it. Holy shit, I fucking did it. Okay. Let's look around here. See if there's anything that's useful. There's got to be something really good at the top, right?

A breadloaf. Groves. This place is a shithole. A broom. All right. Yeah, this place really sucks. I have to open the black gate. Oh, shit.

Oh, shit. The book. Okay, let me go get the book. Oh, go get the book. I didn't see the book. I forgot. Sorry Where's the book?

The Waters of Oblivion 200 fucking darkness And you'll fuck about that shit How much was this again? $75, I'm taking this This is my book now This is 75 bucks bro That's a lot of money

That's an assload of money Okay Ancient Black Door To Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary Sanguine, my brotherhood brother. I've gained entrance to the Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary. I must now speak with Oceiva. Greetings, brother. Greetings. I am Oshiva, mistress of this sanctuary.

Lucian has told me all about you. I welcome you to the Dark Brotherhood. Yes. You stand now in our sanctuary. May it serve as your new home, a place of comfort and security whenever the need arises. When you're ready for work, go and speak with Vicente Valtieri. He handles all assignments for new family members. Okay. But before you go, please accept this gift from your new family.

A unique set of armor lighter than normal leather and black as the void. Now, I've kept you long enough. The Chente is waiting. You'll find him in his quarters. Go now, my child, and may Scythus go with you. Sithis? Who's what Lucian Lucian isn't here very often

His duties with the black hand Keep him very busy So he trusts me to keep the sanctuary in order Okay who's Scythus Those fools in the church And their so called nine divines There is no divinity Beyond the eternal and terrible rule

Of our dread father Scythus Damn, okay Go now dear family member and may then So where's his armor shit shrouded armor fortify sneak fortified blade holy fuck this armor's really good oh damn by lose all of this

that's a lot to lose guys that's a lot to lose night mother wrap you in her cold loving embrace okay I wish to welcome you to the sanctuary my newest brother Everybody here is so nice. My dear Gagrin, you are a life-taker for the Dark Brotherhood.

Our very existence relies on shadow and deception. Do you not value our secrets? Yes, yes, of course I value our secrets, and I have never betrayed them. But using stealth to kill, it's just so weak. Based. But brother, what of the contrast? that require subtlety. You must at least strive to earn the bonuses that are offered.

Bonuses? Ha ha ha ha ha. Useless, I say. Gold and magical trinkets are no substitute for the freedom to slaughter anyone I please at any time. Oh, Gowgren! Your methice may be crude, but your heart is always in the right place. It is an honor to make your acquaintance.

your acquaintance. These people are really nice. Get away from me. Never mind. Oh, baldy. Ah, here you are. So good to finally meet you. Hello.

Warmest greetings to you. I trust you've already spoken with Ochiva. I am Vicente Valtieri. I provide assignments for all new family members. Please do not let my appearance unnerve you. The needs and tenets of the Dark Brotherhood come before me. my own needs as a vampire. Now, if you're ready to get to work,

I can provide you with your first contract. Yes. A contract is a secret pact one enters into with the Dark Brotherhood. They provide us with gold and we remove someone from existence.

A contract is fulfilled by a skilled assassin, such as yourself, who keeps the Dark Brotherhood's end of the bargain. Kind of makes sense. So it has always been. While carrying a out a contract, you may have the opportunity to earn a bonus if certain parameters are met. Now, let's begin, shall we?

I'm not sure how you feel about pirates, but you've got to kill one. A captain, in fact, on his ship, surrounded by his crew. Interested? Yes. Excellent. Here is what you must do. Go to the waterfront district of the Imperial City. There you will find a ship named the Manor.

Marie Elena. Board the ship and find its captain, Gaston Toussaud. He'll be in his cabin. What about my bonus? Eliminate to Sword in any manner you see fit. The pirates have been moving a lot of cargo on board lately. You may be able to smuggle yourself on board in one of the packing crates. Oh, and one more thing.

Get into the habit of asking your fellow family members about any current contract. Their insight may prove invaluable. A cure for vampirism? A cure? Yes. Yes, I believe it's possible. A mage named Raminus Polus has done some research. He's in the Imperial City at the Arcane University. Okay. Cool.

Farewell, brother. Thank you. This is a really nice place. Except that. That's pretty much... That sucks. That's not a temperate bed. I'll tell you that. Get away from me.

Okay. Yeah, this is a really nice place, man. Okay, well, um, I guess now the next thing I need to do is I need to go over to the Imperial City and get on the ship and then kill everybody. That seems pretty fun. Let's do that. Okay.

What the hell do I go? Oh, it's up this way. That's right. Wait, how the hell did I leave this area? Okay, I was in here. Oh, it's this door. I didn't even see the door, of course. All right.

And now we need to go to the Imperial City. Quest's a watery grave. I need to go to the Waterfront District. Okay. Now? Waterfront District. Okay. Click on it.

No, I'm good. Set it as my active quest. Oh, did I not do that? Activate. Hey, sweet lady of where as? Oh, hey, sweet lady of mine. I'll see you again. Yes, I'll see you again.

Sweet lady. What? Morning Blazes. You ain't one of me, crew. You best start explaining yourself, mate, if you want to get off this ship alive. The dread father summoned action. Oh, the justice is at hand, pirate. Justice?

Ha, ha. I've been avoiding that all my life, mate. Let me show you how. Okay. Wait. Oh, just give me a minute. All right. All right, let's take this bitch out.

I sat that bitch down. Oh. Captain, Captain just... The lusty, wait, the lusty Argonian made. What the fuck is this? Oh, we're at a clamor, Captain. We're coming in. How goes it?

Fantastic. Thanks for asking. Hooray. See you. Goodbye. What's that? Showing your face was the last mistake you ever made. Who's there?

Who's there? Me. It's your boy. This... The fuck out of here. Got to here, bitch. Okay. Damn, look at all these books.

God damn. What a nerd. Jesus. It's money? Nah, these are kind of expensive. This one's good. I'll take this one. Yeah, I'll take...

Read the Argonian one? What's this? Note, read? Move the top first, reach inside, and take out all parts, being careful to note their order. Put the carving in the rod. I'm not going to remember that shit. Open the container with a key.

Oh, wow. I got an emerald. flawless pearls and gold. Nice. Fuck yeah. Wow. Well, that was nice. We got all that done all for nothing.

And then let's see what do I have to do now. Okay, yeah, I've got to go back. That was great. Read the fan fiction? Okay. Map. Quest, inventory. Probably miscellaneous for.

right? Wait. Nope. You can't unread it. That's right. I can never unread it. I can always read it later, but I can never unread it. Okay, it's this way, right? Yeah. Okay, is this the... No, that's not it. Is this it? Do I have to go down in the well? Oh! Well, wait a minute. Okay, so I went to some random shithole. Oh, it's this one. There it is. That's fine.

We'll go in through here. Yeah, it's the basement. We have to go talk to this guy. I feel like that was a pretty easy kill. Honestly, that went really well. We just killed that guy? It was a joke. It was the easiest kill of my life.

Or is he? What? What? What? Where he at? Ooh, there he is. There's Baldy. Hello?

So, the pirate has been a little. Wait. Excellent. Why is his hair? No one will mourn his passing, and Sithis has been appeased. Please accept this black band as your reward. It is a ring whose powers are quite useful to those who value discretion.

I'm glad you've returned. The contract is waiting. If you're ready. I do. We need you to stage an accident. Kill the target in the manner specified, and you'll receive a considerable bonus. Do you accept this contract? I accept.

As I expected. Good. The target is a wood elf named Bainlin. You will find him at his home in Broomer. Intersecretly and avoid his man-servant, Gron. On the second floor is a secret door leading to a crawl space. Inside are the fastenings of a mounted head that hangs over Bainlin's favorite chair. Loosen those fastenings any night between eight people.

and 11 p.m. and the head will surely fall on Bainlin as he relaxes in his chair, as is his custom. If Bainlin is eliminated in any other manner, or if the man-servant Grom is killed, you will forfeit the bonus. Now go, and may Sithis be with you. I know what to do. I can do this. So what we're going to do is I'm thinking we pretty much just go in there and use the ring. Oh, yeah, you're right. You're right. Hey, where's my ring? Black band. Okay, well, this one's just like way fucking better.

So we're gonna use this. Yeah, that's way fucking better. I don't, I, I, I, I, I got my sparkleys on me. Oh shit, bro, I'm fabulous. Okay. Where is this loser? Sleigh, bitch. I know, I know.

Oh, have pity, sir. I got nothing to eat. Pity. Just if I can get in here. Maybe there's an area up here? No? Shut up! I have to focus!

There's no back door, guys. Totally fine. It's just what happens. This is part of the process. All right. It's okay. Winners win. Okay.

All right, what? No, it's just the way it is, guys. That's just my life. This is what happens to me. Okay, I'm gonna F5 right now. Got it? That's it, isn't it? It said it's on the second floor.

What did the quest, what do the quest say to do? Now we wait. Oh, fucking, uh, fucking, uh, okay. There we go. He said eight and 11. In your dream, you see a beautiful young woman holding an infant to her breast. It is only as you draw near that you realize that the woman is a desiccated corpse, and the child is a purple and bloated dying of a plague.

as mother and child crumbled to dust, you awaken. Yeah, that's happened before. Do I remove them now? Yes? At the right time? No, no, I am at the right time. Check if he's in a chair? I got him.

I got him. You fucking retard? What a moron! What a fucking idiot! I have to loot him. I have to loot him. I have to loot him. I'm not. gonna loot them. There's no way, right? There's no way. There's no way. There's no. I'm running.

I'm running. It's okay. We're gonna get away. Okay, can I travel back? I cannot fast travel with enemies. No way. I'm running, boys. I'm running. Run really far away. I know, I know. We're gonna go all the way over this way. Man, that shit was easy. Man. No, I didn't. How could I have lost the bonus? The two bonus conditions were that he died with the boarhead and that the servant was not killed. Both of those conditions were secured. I get my bonus.

Baldi. The accident has been staged and Bainlin lies dead. Well done. You have more than earned your reward and bonus. I present to you this. dagger. It's an enchanted blade known as Sufferthorn. Its prick is deadly, I assure you. Yes, you are quite an asset to this sanctuary. In fact, I believe you are ready for advancement. I hereby appoint you Slayer. Well done. Now go, child of Scythus. Go and rest. You'll need it.

All right, rest is over. Back for more. It just so happens I have another contract available, one that requires. an expert in infiltration. Oh, shit. Of course. As always, you fail to disappoint me. Your target is a dark elf named Vailen Dres. He thinks he's safe in prison.

He is tragically mistaken. A prisoner recently escaped from the prison using a set of secret tunnels connected to the Imperial City's sewer system. It's a perfect way inside. Just outside the Imperial Prison is a grating that leads to the sewers. It has recently been tightly locked, but I will provide a key. Okay. It should be easy enough to

locate Dreath in his small cell. Besides, I think you know the way. Hmm? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Veil and Dreath has been imprisoned for many years. His tongue is sharp, but his body is limp and frail. He will prove an easy, pleasurable kill. You will receive a bonus if you fulfill the contract without killing any of the prison guards. Now go. And may the Knight Mother go with you. Here you are. Welcome.

Brother, if I may have a word. Of course. What is it? I've been meaning to ask you about your last contract. I heard there were some... Oh, fuck. He's getting a performance review? So you heard.

Yes, yes, it was quite the debacle. The head just wouldn't sever. Cut, saw, hack. Buy, sit this. I swear. where her tendons were made of steel. Sometimes I wonder how you survive at all without me being there to watch your back. Rye.

Well, my contracts await. Maybe we can talk some more later. Walk always in the shadow of Sithis. You are like a dark gift from the night. Okay, I'm not take a break. I'm going to take a break and chill for a bit. That was fun. That was actually fun.

Yep. Check the reward? I will. I will. let me look at it um steel cutlass sufferthorn is five damage and damage health on strike that's actually pretty good damn that's really good yeah maybe i should use that

2006 was a great year in gaming yeah it was dark brother it's one of the best quest lines i don't even know how any of this works i have no idea i just pretty much play the game and i don't know what the fuck right but uh that was disgusting yeah bro it was good like this game's been really fun to play. I didn't expect it to be as good as it is. I thought it would just be kind of like kind of basically just bullshit, right? But it was actually pretty fun and I've enjoyed it a good amount. I do. I like it a lot. You kill an innocent person which triggers the Dark Brotherhood? Oh really? I just did that for fun. That was accidental, to be honest. You missed this

during the wild game craze? Do you think this would drive you to revisit other older titles from that era? Yeah, it would. Still think games are better now than before. So, in a lot of new games, the combat is better than this. But that's it. Everything else is better in the old games. Like, the stories are better, the dialogue is better, the narrative is better, the voice acting is better, the vibe is better. You know, all these things are better.

Told you about fallout new Vegas. Yeah, yeah, I heard a lot of good things about that one too, yeah. No DEI or furries? Well, I mean, that's kind of a bad timing. There was literally a scaly fan fiction, but yeah, I know what you're saying. The story hasn't been wokenized. Yeah, yeah, it's just good. Wait you have more advanced equipment. Yeah, I know. It's going to be a lot. I can sit and chill and talk for a few minutes, but I'll make sure actually I can just go save game. But yeah, it was really good. I've been pleasantly surprised at the quality. of the game. I think we'll probably play a little bit more of it tomorrow. I haven't really decided. And we streamed more oblivion after Exhibition 33. I don't know, like, I don't know how long all it goes, but I'll probably do more of that then. Until next time, I will be back on tomorrow.

And we'll probably play more oblivion then, and we'll get back into it. So I'll be back on same time. And I'll see you guys then. Bye, boys. Peace. See it.