Athletico Mince - Boiled Parsnips 31: Buttered Crackers

Episode Date: June 23, 2023

A stamping duck, a scary camping trip, Geordie Heat, a Littlepod, a listen to Talksport, and much more. (Rec: 30/8/22) Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello there Bob. Aya, Tisha, I can't read the right one Andy, it seems to be a golden writing. It's deliberate so that you can't read it. And I'm not good at late nights. Not good at late nights. Late nights? Yeah. Is that what it says?

We all like late nights don't we? You're advocating late nights. Yeah. What could beabs, disco? Yeah. What are you like early night, man? Oh, okay. I'm an early night, man.

Oh, seven. Now, I'm a 10 o'clock. 10 o'clock? I'm a 10 o'clock or a lot'clock? I'm a 10 o'clock, or I do do about 50 minutes to TV. I do one episode of Reality TV. I'm doing 90 day fiance at the moment. I do. I don't know what that is.

Oh, it's a good show. Strong, solid show. Is it U.K. or US? It's US has got about nine seasons. U.K. has one season. I would recommend you start on the UK What is the concept the concept is is people meet people online Make them their fiance then try and bring them to the country under what's called a K1 visa Which means they have to get married within 90 days. Oh, so they bring it to me from abroad. Yeah

And there's some crackers, Andy. There's, you know, the stereotypical, um, big 50 year old housewife, uh, 24 year old, say shells, resident. This, this, this sounds excellent. Oh, Andy, it's, it's totally, you know, I know you mock me for me TV choices sometimes, but that, we want a sounds excellent. Oh, Andy, it's, it's totally, you know, I know you mocked me for me TV choices sometimes, but don't want a beautiful show. It's just got everything. Oh, it sounds very good. It's got everything a viewer needs, you know, that involvement of like, sitting there saying he's definitely just there for the work permit.

He's just there for the work. Oh, maybe he's not. Maybe he knows, sir. And then you find out in the end. Well, that kind of ties in a little bit with the song that I've got to sing later on about a mushroom farm. I don't know if you were going to say, I've bought love. I've played a bit of music a while ago and you suggested I do a song, I think you said

mushroom farming. Right, you are. If you did, I've done one about mushroom farming anyway. Yeah, so I'll have that later on. Do you like love, though? Would you like to write, it's so about love, do you like love? Ah, I've done one about mushroom farming in here, so I'll have that later on. Do you like love though? Would you like to write, so about love? Do you like love? I love love. Yeah, love, love mixed the world go around, doesn't it?

Yeah, well, maybe, maybe. I should rewrite the mushroom lyrics now with a corporate more, love it to them. I've been listening all week, Andy, to that effing country music. Oh yeah, I can't get enough of that. So I would like to tell you about the gift of song. I've been listening to that country-buck and music. I've been eating my hot dogs from the can. I've been waddling around the streets of Sunderland

Pushing my old station in his fucking pram As I've been listening to that country fucking music I've been sitting on the toilet eating ham I filled the bowl with hundreds of wet wipes And now I just can't flush the fucking pan I'm not hunky, I'm not bright as a spark I'm empty door, door, turn, I'm pushing on shadows Chitties in the fucking dark

Oh yeah, I'm still listening to that country-fucking music Staring at the underpants on my living room floor It seems to me that they have started moving Trying hard to make an escape out of my front door But I'm not hunky, I'm not bright as a spark I'm mandy door, door, sun I'm pissing on shadows Chittles, chittles In the fucking dark, greg it, man Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah you know, yeah, it's like well done. It's someone like Baz Bainbridge, he's some famous fellow who makes things like praise. It's Baz, Baz Lurpak.

Baz Lurpak, yeah. Do you love Pac-Man, Laura? You're a solid butler. I'm a Lurpak, man. I know if I have conversations about butler, you know, butler and me, weak of bicks. And I'll give you another revelation I also like to put the Jacobs cream crackers. I do. Aandie I'm with you there put it on pretty thick. Yeah. And then some sliced cheese on top. What you think of this I'll run this past you then. All right. At this very moment I've only got a couple of the crackers left, I go, Jacob's cream cracker, think butter, and then, you know, that's squirty, primula cheese from the choux. You know that? Nice. Yeah. Can I just ask you, how hard healthy is that? Exactly.

Oh, and it's not but that hard health thing is basically just eat a seed of birds face of coming. So it ain't gonna happen. No, it seems to be fine. So you just suck it all out off now. Yeah, I've got me rheumatoid arthritis back though. That's terrible business. That's quite retro because you had that fewer euro. I don't know. I haven't had that nine. That's since my 30s. That's awful. Bastard things come back and you six, these can't handle it at this age. It's pretty funny. Yeah, me dad has that as well.

And he suffers bad from it. So a kind of sympathize, kind of vicariously through him. You kind of sympathize. That's kind of sympathize. That's like we're like contingent of something. I'm a don't really. of sympathise. That's like contingent of something. I'm a don't really. I'm a don't sympathiser. Yeah, not really.

But I like to see how that do. You haven't longed back from holiday, Andy. Was it one with a bit of buffet action? No, there wasn't any buffet action. It was, I went to Florida with the kids to do the Disney stuff. And you didn't have a walk up buffet. There wasn't, there's Corvian regulations now.

Oh, shit. Some of the places that used to do buffers, they'll now, they'll do buffers, but they bring it all to your table. So I mean, you know what, the American portions are like, they just bring you everything. Yeah. In like loads of balls and you see there you go,

get that down here and then Donald Duck comes along and poses for a photograph with you and you know you can't complain. What's Donald like is he alright? He's a bastard. He's a right bastard. That's why I like him. I was in one of the restaurants and he was there and the other lads were there Pluton or Goofy Mickey and they were doing kind of a song and dance route name brought out in the middle of the restaurant and Goofy Mickey put a clap in their hands You know dance and we haven't recite the side all that kind of thing Donald just starts stamping his big fucking duck foot on the floor

Repeatedly and he killed the mood don't you think Mickey Mouse is a bigger bastard than Donald Duck Why's that? I don't know he's a hero certain little sort of goody goody uni. Yeah, but I mean it's for the kids isn't it? That's what the kids want. They want them to be all happy and smiley you know like they don't want little musicians big ducks stomp in its fate everywhere. Do you like ducking chips? I love duck and chips. It's just a New Zealandie. A lot of putty ducks, you know, you get duck everywhere, but it's very seldom offered with chips.

Oh, yeah. I know. If I get duck from the Chinese takeover with pancakes and all that, and the whole you see it's all nice. I get cider chips as well. Get cider chips and everything. Yeah, and a slice of white love.

But the... No. No, not a pig. What, getting back to buttering just briefly, before we move on to whatever the hell it is we're gonna do. I also, when I was a child, used to get, you know, McVitties digestive biscuits.

Yeah. We had them with butter on before. Yeah, and I can see that that would work Andy yeah I still think putting them on waiter because he's discussed putting I love the way he said but they said butter three times butter butter butter butter butter yeah okay butter I went to the lake district that was my little holiday. Right, it was nice there, yeah. I don't know if you know, I always camp on the Asheness farm

up near Asheness Bridge in Kessik. Yeah. I just went on me on, do some thinking, you know what I mean? Yes, I don't know. I don't know what I'm thinking. When I go, do thinking, or like, just all the happens is I find out how dull it is just thinking. I don't know what I'm trying to achieve. It was empty when I arrived, which was nice.

Because with me I'm being on the Italian night, it can become a bit difficult. I've seen it, yeah. But on the first night, in the middle of the night, as would happen, I heard like a crew pulling up in a car, putting a tent up. And the thing is, Andy, this is big field, about 10 acres or something. And to pull it up, right next to mine. No way, it's just.

You get that, and I say that in car parks, you know, like retail parks, I used to go on like a nap in a retail park. Yeah. And you park right on the outskirts on the periphery and a little car will come in the park next year. Yeah. I think sometimes they'll bang on the window because they think you're dead. Are you a car sleeper? I have been able to get it. yeah. It's better than driving tight, isn't it? True, no that's true. It's hard to sleep at the services though.

A lot of people pulling up screaming. Yeah, too much power. Screaming that they're pasties too, fucking hot. Anyway, so first thing in the morning, there was so much out in good morning outside me tent the farmer comes to collect your money and so I presumed it was him. There was so much out in good morning outside me tent the farmer comes to collect your money and So I presumed it was him then the door was a unzipped of me tent

Yeah, I didn't know it was unzipped rude and head pops through the door morning Robert I thought it was you from Stockton Council What a pleasant surprise Robert to meet you here in the middle of nowhere, Robert. Are you on your own, Robert? That says, yeah, it just makes us come away for a bit of pacing quiet. Pacing quiet, Robert, that's the last thing you need. Come on, shove over and let's have a nice little chat, Robert. Oh, a chat?

Yes. So I sat up, tucked myself in the corner, you know. And as he came in, I could see that all he was wearing is western, his underpants. Have you any biscuits, Robert? You know a tracker or an energy bar? Something outdoorsy?

No, sorry, older man, I found them a bit dry. He says, I know what you mean, Robert. As a matter of fact, my lips are very dry at the moment. It must be something to do with the fresh air. Then from outside the tent I heard all his crow and he started to chant, kiss the Alden and kiss the Alden and I was just about, because it's tempting it was just about to do it I woke up and I was just dreaming yeah I mean my story is a very rarely a dream but that's what happened so I was alone and filled with a lovely holiday yeah and he didn't say the olden man god not really I mean I feel like it's it's unusual that he's in your subconscious

there. And you're thinking about him, aren't you? You're thinking about him. Yeah, did the dream remind you at all of the movie Pretty Woman? No, not so much. Not really. I didn't think that there was any kind of millionaire bestowing gifts on a admittedly very sexy prostitute. So, no, bestowing gifts on a admittedly very sexy prostitute so no I didn't have this kind of connection there. I just wondered but never mind would you like to play a little game that I have devised? It is called are you feeling okay? Okay I'll go on that. Shall I play it? I'll play that yeah. Alright here we go concentrate please. to play it? I'll play with that. Yeah. Alright, here we go. Concentrate please. Yeah, that's the wrong thing. That was like cartoon music.

For when you got the toilet. Oh, calm down because it got a little bit silly. Got a little bit silly there for a couple of seconds, didn't it? So I told you, calm down. Focus. Bob. Yeah, welcome. Welcome along too. Are You Feeling Okay? Thanks for having me. Ready to play? Yep. Bob, Are You Feeling Okay? Now think about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can say yeah.

Confident about that. Yeah Humiliation Not feeling okay, you're not you're not You've got slight unease about the cost of living crisis right And also the thought of a cool you key went there's making you a bit gloomy. What with your rheumatoid arthritis and everything. And all that. Oh well. So, I gave me an answer.

You weren't aware, but you're actually not feeling okay, but thanks for playing. Thanks for having me. Sure have some questions from the passing of us. Go on then. I've got one here. I'll have to Tim Hulladeer again, the fellow who keeps asking for a day off, and we keep seeing North. He says, really, really need a day off soon.

Oh, look, I'll turn a blind eye for you just once to chuck the city. Honestly, yeah, I would say throw a sickie we want, miss him, will we? Yeah. Tell him, when a when a bothered Slimy see as asked how many do you need? Well, this is my rule of thumb sausages to Jimmy dodges three Pints for fish fingers five

Now that's a good list that Rhymes as well. I think does it maybe. So that's my answer to that. Yeah, I'll just say just at least one of everything. Robert Straw, Straw Bioneer, Straw Bioneercher, says, if you want to build your dream service station, what would it include? I think one of them, massage chairs, and a coconut shy, that do me.

Or a coconut shy, be good good, I need I'd say I'd say I'm not I'm not I'm not paying for it. I'd quite agree. I would say this then I'd like I like it if there's a McDonald's because I like a burger and a chocolate milkshake when I'm on the move I think there should be a shooting range including cross-bos Sleeping pods totally silent Yeah loading cross-boss, sleeping pods, totally silent. Yeah. And I was gonna say maybe a rolling keepy upy competition,

but I like the coconut shy, can I incorporate that into my ass? So thank you. You kind of fit in nicely with the shoot and range, I think. I went with a shoot and range in Prague once and the fellow who ran up was called Rambore. So you can kind of imagine from that, the kind of levels of health and safety

that he was deploying. Did you enjoy it? It was really good. Yeah, got to show some big guns and I felt like a big man. Thomas Winnerer says, why should I bother? Well, you know what Thomas, if you don't bother, nothing will ever change, so that's why you should bother. Yeah, to avoid not knowing or missing out. Yeah, that's both. Someone, I don't think this is a real name, someone called Rhoda Borax. Yeah. Says, if circles didn't exist, what would be the optimum shape of a manhole?

Hmm. I'll say the octagon does sound about right, don't it? Yeah. Because manholes are serious business and an octagon's a serious shape in it. It's a serious shape, isn't it? And you can get some good purchase. I think if you need to kind of haul yourself out of it with all of those straight lines.

Well, someone said, if a new Lee Kempin says if a new planet was discovered tomorrow, what would you name it? And I would call it the new planet. Planet 2022. That's not bad, Andy. Something like that. That's not bad, Andy. Something like that. That's not bad. Pete the Lynch says, what's the best spoon?

It's the dessert spoon. Terrible spoon, I would say, Andy, because it incorporates all the smaller spoons. Do you know what I mean? What would you mean when you say, table spoon? I mean, I just use a dessert spoon as a table spoon. Well, but I'm saying a table spoon, it's the big lad.

Yeah. Because you know, the teaspoon serves no purpose anymore, I don't think. No, if you've got a tablespoon, you can use everything. Yeah, I mean, sometimes if I'm making a cup of tea, I won't use a teaspoon of fish that tea bag out with a mug. Hey, hold on a minute, hold on a minute. And do you know those little yogurt pots that the kids like? You couldn't get a table spoon and them, could you? Don't care, donate them. No, I've heard nothing. Anything else question-wise?

Well, well, well, we'll go back to my few more a bit later on, maybe. Shall I try my song about the mushroom picking farm now? Go on then, let's hear it. I got a mushroom farm. It's quite near yum. Go on then, let's hear it. to look for the kids as we check them all for blight. But sadly, due to new Brexit Mushroom exports and regulations, the farm closed down perv and opened at the end of last month and all remaining crops have had to be insiderated. A mushroom team fell apart, the scenes, the lights are out of work, they went berserk and smashed up the sifting machine. Oi!

Okay, well, it's a modern tale, that in it, with a political under twist. Yeah, what a jointly tune! It is a jointly tune, enough to cheer up the nation, I would think. That's all, Pso. Managed to get old of a new bit of script for the upcoming Nutflix series, Jordy, hate, andry. Okay, ask me how I get them. How did you get them Bob?

I can't tell you, I just can't tell you. So here goes. Jordy heats. Crime on the Keyside outside the hotel, Devann and Newcastle. Do you think Spectready Howe is delivering his briefing to the squad? Right, as you all know, we are here to capture the nomarks who have been pilfering five fucking wines from the wine display a'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r a waiter and I will be acting as the mate on the lectern next year fucking entrance. Any

fucking questions, yes, Carol. Are there any egg dishes on the menu? I don't, it's fine fucking dining restaurant, am I with some fucking quail eggs. Oh are they gonna fuck off? Tiny little pointless bastards with no clout. I could eat 20 of them and it wouldn't even tickle me for a glass. Wait, wait, wait, whatever. Well, that's going to keep you communicating that with an old packing truck. Yes, what is it? Please say your Welsh. He's sorry sir, but mine keeps popping out all the time.

Is there an act to it? Yeah, Carol, shove it in harder. Who Eddie? Yeah, that's what she said, factored, said, well, couple, let's fucking do this. He's not gonna be a fuck out of the seat. Anyway, interior, hotel diva restaurant, be it's in the well-shaceted at their table,

John John is taking orders, the only other dine as a siren dave, the hairy bikers, a customer approaches chief inspector how at the restaurant entrance. Good evening sir, do you have a, I can't read your name. No I do not, for I am Mr Sting from the massive house with the massive driveway and I have just taken delivery of the world's most massive Serano ham which is festering in my massive ban so that Trudy doesn't clock it. Large table for one please and an extra soft cushion for my gorgeous ass. Ok alright if you would like a packet of home rice sir.

He seats Sting at a table in front of the chilled wine display cabinet. Your waiter will be of a very shortly sir. First of all, before you nick off, I have some questions. Fire a factor in visa. Is this restaurant classy and up-market? Well, we like a factor thing so. Right. Are there any nausea crackers in here? I can't stand norse parkers.

I don't want any more guests allowed in tonight. No, the diner's here, very fact in discreet. Right. Next up is the wind, a vampire. To be honest, we're not absolutely sure.'s a good lad though and you won't get any argy fucking party for me. And tell me which is your most fancy but love-wine? It's the 19th, 76th month's year I, it's that purple bottle there, just be honest, you are fucking ed.

I think about it. Now, send the creepy wet and all the head, instantly and without hesitation. o ffag y ned. O, sy'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod, mae'n gwybod French-seaf-fuck on French-shite. I think the souffle has eggs in it, Carol. I it does but it's hidden egg. I need to be able to see the egginess of the egg. I'm the sirma panchex and meatballs. If the egg's hidden, then the food's forbidden. Interior, Harry Biker's turban, Dev. This is nice isn't it, Sai? Yeah, it's like a posh party isn't it? All the walls and all the things are like a wonderful treasure filled with filled dream. Yeah, the sort of dream that your hope will never end. What do you love more? Things are dreams. It's got to be things because things are real.

Interior restaurant entrance. George Clark, the architect arrives. Well, well, this is an amazing space. It makes amazing use of light and reflection. Have you ever thought of installing a feature wall of glass to make it even more amazing? No, not more fucking cool, mate. I was sorry, but I guess Mr. Sting doesn't want any more dine, is it? No, that's a fucking hammer blow for you. Here, no worries. It's been amazing. Just seeing this amazing space and getting glanced at the amazing Mr. Sting. I'll just, I'll just hop down German Kibabs. They're doing some amazing things with Grieh Meets.

Well, all the best for that fact, that there was an interior thing on the table. I will have a massive steak, a massive ball of chips and a kelly-welly with the squirty cream on top and I will take that classy purple bottle of wine as a gift for Trudy to stop and get no madty if I'm omelette. Well, none is not dare anymore've somebody else nabbed it! Close up of wine cabinet. The purple bottle is missing. Right, everybody, stay exactly where you're fucking are.

I'm Tiffy Specter, Eddie out, from J.O.D.E. and someone in this restaurant is a fucking thief. How dare you include me in that accusation? Are there a good mind to...ation? Are there a good mind? Don't even have a good mind? How dare you include me in that exact accusation? Calm down Mr Stink, it's not personal. I'm just still fucking job. Carol Denise, please search the Harry bikers and Mr Sting. Out of my fog and wear watch, I'm searching Mr Sting and it could get very fog and personal. Denise searches the Harry Bakers.

I, Lads, can you put your hands out to the side and spread your legs please? Dev, he he he. This is like a party game where everyone is smiling just because of the fun, things and that. Ah, do you agree, Sai? Yeah, it's like, unwittingly, we are out of our comfort zone and living life in the moment, you know, like we did when we were kids. Ah, chaff, Mr. Howe, all clear over here. Carol, search is sting. Put your arms out to the side and spread your legs.

No chance, do it, or I will grip your bow, so tightly they will subdivid into their individual cells until they are indistinguishable from a fork and paste. Oh yeah, no problem madam officer. I'll clear sir. Well that's a fucking mystery. No that a fucking bad. Come on we a better pack up here and rethink our fucking strategy. Holy holy holy holy holy all done. I've just written a song in my head that will register its and make you a dog this incredible moment. Mr. Sting picks up his loot and begins to sing. Oh Mr. Sting, yes Mr. Sting, he's over six feet tall.

Oh Mr. Sting, that Mr. Sting makes all the pork looks more. He drives a right red spareska and he owns a lithium mine. Oh Mr. Sting, now he is the thing, he didn't steal the wine. My wee wee is dark! Cooked a baccalape, I German kebab house. Mr. George Clark is sat in his cow with a donno in one hand and a bottle of purple wine in the other. This is an amazing taste. That's the end. So did you follow the story under you Nick the wine? I wasn't paying attention. It was George Clark. George Clark. Yeah he's having it around the back of the Gibab house.

God who knew? Who knew he was a thief? Have you got young? Kebab house in Sonland. We were getting one. We're getting one. They're in the process of putting it together. I think it's next door to the shelter charity shop. That means anything, but yeah. Why don't you make a real effort to get your phone app together? Get down there on open and be the first mac I'm doing a video do like an influencer video of me going in there eating German meat. I think you should do it

Right, I might do I've watched that thing about Mac McAfee Maca-Fee Good It's all right, and the it's all right. It's the thing about that would stock festivals meant to be good I started it. I couldn't be bothered. Couldn't be bothered. Well, I didn't want to watch it because we'd thought I went to the Lades Festival last week and then I didn't want to kind of like see things that you know might occur in her world. I was just that kind of terrified because she's just little. I picked an episode from that Lades Festival. They've done them on the morning morning or wherever it is it's quite a sight in it it's just bemused and frightened

teenagers just wandering around in all directions yeah like like if they've been a war or something like that she had a good times that's the main thing hello don't eat glue! I don't know. Welcome along! I introduced you yet, that's speak. Sorry. Why you turn? Welcome along to what I'm not calling the Dominic Little Pods,

due to legal reasons I can't go into, but all I say is that I refuse to be silenced. What I guess today is a former TV personality ad fisherman Bob Boba. Hello Boba, welcome along. Hi, thanks for having us. To the Dominic Little Pot. Did you also used to be a weatherman Bob? No, I don't know. No, not me. No. Yeah sure. No, I don't know, no, not me. No, don't know. Yeah sure If you're just giving me someone else's maybe you're not the guest I thought I was booking They were like we'll crack on I've got some notes here. You got a new book coming at Bob. Yeah, it's a

It's a novel called the Satsuma complex. Yeah, it's about blog who meets a lass So that's all right, isn't it? Well, I'll be out, I'll reach the last one. Now a Facebook, I could have done better. And if anybody wants to read, the one that I've done in 2009, it's called Don't Get Done, Get Done. Great ways to stretch your money, not your budget. And it's all Amazon for 62 Peds. As we're both offers, for something we could discuss on the podcast today, do you use a pencil or a pen or a typewriter?

I use a laptop, you know, like I suppose you call them computers, they're in the... Oh, a computer. Yeah. Do you call them computers, they do a... A computer. Yeah. Do you print it out yourself and hand it in in a publisher or do you just send it by email? I send it by the email, dumb. Right.

Because while I've done mine in 2000, then I have printed it out myself. I didn't realize you could just send it in for the email, said it. But I did read on the internet recently you could make your own print rig out of vegetable oil and such. Yeah. So I don't know how true that is though. What else have we got here? Have you ever tried writing with your foot instead of your end?

I have tried that at Dom, yeah. I thought it as well, to bleed night, man. It isn't night, man. Absolutely not, Yeah. Yeah, it's good to try that just to see. That's what I think. It is good to try just to see yeah. It's like that question why bother well you know just to see. Now I want to prove it to that because this is a different part of the podcast. Okay. Would you describe your wife as being giggly? Um no. Do you know what? Do you mean like bubbly, Giggly?

Yeah. Teeheehee, you know what I'm like? No, she's, she's more GIFOI, I don't know. Oh alright, okay. My niece, my niece is very Giggly. Very Giggly. Yeah, don't worry too much about her question, that's a special question. And I ask that to every guest who comes on a podcast. Good question. No, I'm very good question. Composting a database. Yeah. Giggly wives. Giggly lassers.

Yeah. If you like. I forgot some brandy for a podcast this time. I'm freaking very much for joining me. It's been great. It's been a pleasure. I really am. Thank you. The, he's very small, small dom you know. Very small. Compact. Compact man. Yeah.

I'm thinking maybe five, two, someone like that. So there you go. But that's not wrong with that. Yeah, I'm talking about the criticises. He functions adequately I think. Yeah. Talksport, right? I got hold of a nice bit of audio from Jim White and Simon Jordan's

Deadline show from last year. How did you get that? How did I get it? I can't tell you I'm the... So if you'd like to be Simon Jordan... Right. Let's say it's a nice little extract. So here we go. Oh my word, how exciting is this sure Simon? It's like a roller coaster on the moon, just as an asteroid is about to hit. Do you agree Simon? Don't really James, just not listening to a sedated hippo underwater every day on. Oh you're so contrary Simon, this show is where it's at, all the last minute deals as they happen exclusive to our listeners.

I don't mind admitting, my descending as they happen exclusive to our listeners. I don't mind admitting, my descending call on is stretching to its limits and my privates are rotating like a Catherine wheel. That is how excited I am. I'm afraid you are facilitating an indifferent response to an inadequate premise. I like they say, a beach ball works just as well on a plane field if you've given birth to an idiot. What does that even mean Simon? It means that we should move on from this transgression of moral perpetues. Hold on, just hold on, how thrilling is this? It's sensational deadline day breaking news and we can reveal that according to my sources, jilling them under 21- 21 prospect, Kyle Forbes is going on a season long loan to Sutton United.

It's a done deal. That's incredible. Breast taking. Dramatic. It raises the very long hairs on my shoulder. And I'm not ashamed to say it. What do you make of this bombshell Simon? Oh, I don't know the boy but the financial model at Gilligan is indicative of the malaise, the permeates and underthrusts the current status quo. It's a contradictory between efficiency and efficacy and it's not future proof for the lad. Time for a brick while I hyperventilate.

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minds. You're hearing it here first and it's gonna shake the system right away from the Premier League to grassroots. Listen up. Stockport County have made a last-minute bid for all the mathematics out of fear for a centre back just grim of £100,000. That's mind boggling. It's fantasy, it's making my gall bladder vibrate so furiously there's a real danger my tie will ignite. What's your use, Simon? Well, Jim, I think you're still a striker of the Malays in the current paradigm of thought shows a fundamental misunderstanding of the optics involved.

You don't pay the ferryman to rob Peter and then pay Paul and remember what goes up will continue to go up until the point at which he comes down. Madness, absolute madness and remember you heard it for your first. Here first, more after this message is your face like an air-dried fig. On your hands, bulbeth and powdery, is your mind foggy and bent. On your thoughts' wayward and incoherent, then you need the Kiro XT air fryer with top and bottom heat distribution fans, blows away your grief and despondency for just 29.99 plus delivery charges. Transform your appearance and your prospects with the Kiro XT multi fan air fryer because conventional cookers are well shit. Oh that's where it ended. I didn't tear it after the adverts.

Alright. I think you had enough probably. Nice to hear the air fryer mentioned again there. When that plus buttered weight a bit because I think it takes us back to the almost the beginning of this. The early days. It's yours a one drawer air fryer or a two drawer. It's one drawer but I've got a new insert that you can put in it that you can do like chicken breasts on or maybe fish fingers or burgers.

So it's like a different, it's like a higher kind of shelf you can put in it so you can do as much. Are you still using it as much? I use it regularly yeah. Yeah and it can become a bit addictive from what I've been doing for my research. Well Andy I think that's about all that we need to discuss today. Yes. We need to thank the fasteners once again for their support. Thank you so much. Yeah. And we'll continue. I've got the scaffolders around today so I'll go and make them a cup of tea. Very nice. We're reconvened some future time. See and thank you and goodbye. Thank you.