Athletico Mince - Boiled Parsnips 57: Kettles

Episode Date: October 2, 2026

A head injury, country music, safety, a Littlepod, kettles, Farke and Bamford visit Peter, and a crow story. (Originally recorded for Club Parsnips on 1/12/25 https://www.patreon.com/athleticomince) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

All right, Andy, what are you doing like? Oh, I'm all right, thank you very much for asking. All right, you think they're doing this one pretty fast. All right, let's have a look at the T-shirt. E-R-G, blue, white, red, black, white. Do you recognise that? Is it something like the St. Etienne shirt or the... It's close.

We're talking Syria are. Oh, I know, it's Sambidoria, in it? Sambidoria. Yeah. Why me? I can't believe. I believe I got that. Nice shirt. It had, who did they have? They had

Hullet, Lombardo, David Platt, Roberto Mancini, Gus Caesar, David Armstrong. Yeah. All the greats. Now listen, I like it a lot. Thank you. But there's

something like a spot or someone's thrown a dart at you between your eyes. What's that about? What is that? Well, spotted. Yes. It is, I think they call it acne. Oh, acne? Which is quite unusual for a 53-year-old man. It is, maybe it's a good sign that your hormones are still flowing around you.

It's probably a sign of hormone deficiency, if anything. But it's, as you said, yeah, it's right between the eyes. I think I know what's caused it. I've got a new hat to wear when I'm out walking a dog. What do they call them hats? Hats. Hats. Oh, bobble hat.

They just call them hats. Bobelette. No, it's like a bobble hat without a bobble. right a beanie a beanie oh a beanie yeah I mean whenever I see a beanie

I miss the bubble you know what I mean I think that they've taken it off It doesn't look quite right There's a bubble that needs a bubble Well it's a bit I got a beanie And it's keeping my head so warm That it's making it sweat Gotcha

And I think the sweat has got into me paws Yeah And created this bullet hole Yeah Either that or I've been hit by an air rifle pellet In your sleep Without realising it. I was hit by an air pellet, air gun pellet when I were a young.

One of my brothers... That doesn't surprise me? My brothers was brandishing it, you know, like for the laughs. Right. Set it off and it hit my elbow, came in, one hole, went out the other hole, another one, created its own new hole and came out. So I was pretty chuffed about that. I've got two nice little scars on my elbow.

I can actually sell shot. So you weren't shot by a four You were shot by a friend It's shot by a brother Yeah it's like living in America in it It is a bit I've been listening to your new book Oh right

The audio version of it I get to hear your voice Which you know I don't get enough of a lot Very nice that you've created One of the characters Based on myself Which one's that Well that's the one that's got a really

Really cracking ass No spoilers I'm not saying out else I know the one yeah thank you appreciate that It wasn't based on you But I do see it

Hey look I want to sing my song You got song The country music song I want to get this thing going You know we're gibbering on Well done Sundland by the way Etcetera Hope it keeps happening

I'll find the music shall I Yeah You're getting ready for Christmas Sunday You're getting it all You've been down to home since Be and them and get your decorations.

No, I'm not buying any new decorations. I've just got decorations that I use every year. Do you get a new tree or have you got a false tree? I've got a fake one. Yeah. It's decent though. It does the job. Are we diverting in a tree talk now?

Well, for my first year ever, I've got a fake one. I haven't put it up yet. I'm not one of these early get-ahead goers, you know. Yeah. I don't mind. I think times are hard and if people will want to stick their teeth. tree up in the middle of November. Yeah.

Who will we wait to judge them? Yeah. You know? Do you mean sticking up their ass or just stick it up? No, I just meant to stick it up in the living room. Right. Are you ready to sing your song now? I'm always ready to sing my song.

All right. Here we go. Three, two, one. I've been listening to that country fuck of music. Yeah. I've been eating don't a meat from night and five. I've been waddling around the street's sun. with my Alsatian Eric Fuck by my side Yes, I've been listening to that country folk music

I bought some cheap-rate juice from Kazakhstan I've been sucking on it like a new born baby And it's bent my eyes and turned my brain to land But I'm not honky I'm not bright as a spot I'm Andy Dawson and I'm pissing on shadows Shadows In the fucking dog

I'm still listening to that country fucking music Started seeing American soldiers under my bed These soldiers seemed to have started moving Trying to find a Viet Cong hidden in my shed But I'm like honky, I'm that bright as a spark, I'm Andy Dawson, and I'm pissing on shadows. Shadows, shadows.

In the fucking day. Oh, yeah. That kind of gets us in the mood, don't it, Andy? You know what I mean? Having a bit of a scene. Kind of does. Kind of does. We should mention, again, music there provided by the singer Frank Turner and his group.

That's fantastic, isn't it? Do you want a couple of names? to consider. Go on. Why did you look like that? He did a look which said you don't want them. I want them. They're unwelcome.

No, you've misinterpreted the look. The look was one of saying, Christ, I hope they're decent. That's all that was. Right, okay. You can be calling odd numbers. Okay. He only does things in ones,

threes or fives. Doesn't do anything higher than fives. Okay. He's Mr. 1, 3, 5. Colin odd numbers. Okay. Remembering, Mr. 135? Right, but it's just as a remembering for me, you know.

Or you can be Ian de greaser. Ian de greaser, he generates incredibly potent spittle that can remove grease stains from any surface in seconds. Ooh, tempting, tempting, anything else? Or you can be honky tonk, as per usual. I'm going to try being the de greaser. you know, I've got a lot of grease needs shifting in my pad.

I bet you have. Oh, really have, yeah. That's why I come up with it. Ian de Greaser. Welcome to the show. Ian de Greaser. All right, Ronnie. Hot dogs, how are you doing? All right, Lake. Thank you very much, yes.

I've had a blog, a vlog, I don't know what it is, sent in to me from Mickey Dixon. You know, he's from Teesside, obsessed with his safety and that. Got a bit of a Christmas feel to it, actually. Right. You want me to play it?

See you might get to learn something from it. Yes, please. All right, here goes. All right, Mickey Dixon here. I'm down the garden centre, you know, passing some time looking at the Christmas shite lake. I noticed in the car park there's no grip bin. You know, imagine the carnage.

Does a sudden snowfall or dropping temperature cause an ice puddles like done better thinking about. Oh, look there's Gary Padlocks. Getting his wife's wheelchair. the car. All right, Gary, do you know there's no

grit bin in this car park? No, grid bin? You're joking at you? No grid bin. That could be a pot of lipstick with a number of front-wheel

drive vehicles in here. I might just fuck off to homesense. I'm only eating a look at the Christmas shite maybe buy some old-fashioned sweets for the glove box

like... All right, Margaret. Mrs Padlock, how's your rip, love? It's fuck. I'm terrifying. The supporting tissue, completely raged. It's born on bone.

It's like scraping a fish slice down your brickwork. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, Margaret Padlock. Hold on, Gary. Gary, what's that you wearing on your feet? It's me chicken coloured slipans. Fuck sick, Gary. They're entirely inappropriate.

You might as well be wearing fucking ice skates. One false step, and your bollocks will be wrapped round your tits. Well, don't have a good me. I didn't know. wasn't a grid bin? I, right, fair enough point taken. Do you know what I reckon that's a good call about

homesense? I saw them topping up the grid bin last weekend. Especially if you're only here later. Look at their Christmas shite. Yeah, fuck this death trap. I'm off, cheers, Mickey. I'll see you, Gary, and Margaret Padlock's. Truth is, I should tell the council about

the lack of grit, but they're too busy printing leaflets about the multi-faith winter celebration and how the park, you know, with Senita, top in the belt. A lot of boomers. A tone between, you know, the love of her outfits and the lack of a proper Santa, like, you know. Hope they've got decent security bars, like, because it could be quite a rush if she kicks off a set with so macho, you know. One of her palm leaf outfits, like, oh, look, there's a daft lad collecting trolleys.

I think it's Norris Barcell, son. How's your dad's son? Nice. How's your mom? Nice. How's your job going like? Nice. Okay.

Stay sharp, son. Keep safe. Nice. Right, I'm inside now. Look, I, first thing, there's run, crags. Walking towards the Christmas shite leg, he's got a whole turban stuck off his ass. He hasn't got his walking stick. Now, if that isn't asking for trouble, then I'm Kenny G's car mechanic,

which I'm not by the way he uses We'll Be Senior in South Central LA He used to use talk of the town like But they went bust You know when the boss got neck deep into meme kinds Alright Ron You come to look at the Christmas shite

Aye Wife wants a big inflatable Santa For the front lawn You'll have to tether that Ron You know if a wind gust it might blow into the road Crash your car. A lot of Nissan micros in your road, Ron. And the breaking distance on them fuckers is next to now.

Go on, unless they've got the winter tyres fitted, like, yeah, I'm well aware of that, Mickey. Why aren't you using your stick, wrong? Ron, if you keel over, I won't be able to help, like, because my knee joints bone on bone. And I can't phone for help because the wife snapped me phone when she caught me registering for the post-cored lottery, you know. What's you got your trolley there, Ron?

Ah, some travel suites, a bag of onions. The wife likes to suck on an onion, you know, when we're on the move. All right, where you're off to? Driving up, Satan Carew with the other adult male that lives in the house with us for a few days, you know, in the caravan. I will make sure you check the other adult male doesn't get car sickness, like it might get delirious in the car, start pulling at your wife's scalp, making their eyes turn on milky. How are you getting on with your neck structure, Lee? Oh, it's still born on born, Mickey. Doctor says I should stop listening to ACDC.

But that's, you know, it's easier said than done when the other adult male in the house plays them round the clock. Ah, fair point. Take care, Ron, be safe. Oh, look, you're Don Goff over there, looking at the 12-volt reindeer shelf display. Hey, John, you check the transformer that comes with that. Check it's compatible with your dimmer switches

You don't want an overload Shudden you be keeping your ass out of my business You nausey fuck You are so to yourself, John Hey, I heard you and your wife went to wit me See if you could spot any seagulls with milky eyes Was it nice to yell? Ah, very nice

Do you want me to talk through the day? Not really, Don. Been too much talk about milky eyes recently Anyway, be safe, John Oh, that's the end of his... That's it. Is that where it comes to an end? Yeah.

Oh, well, there you go. Very abrupt. A lot in there to unpack. A lot to unpack. And some of the were taken on board. Come along to the Dominic Little Pod with me. Doenick, Littlewood. I have splashed out on a new theme tune for the podcast.

And I like to play that. all you boys and girls right now. Yeah, it was I got it from a fella called John Obsk. It's not exactly why I asked for, it cost me two grand, so I'm going to use it.

You better use it, rather use it, I haven't introduced you yet, by the way, before you start chipping in, piping up and all that. Coming up on today's podcast, why up to 95% of kids' toys bought this Christmas could be radioactive. And I'll be

telling you how you could lose a stone over the festive period just by moving your facial muscles. Right, now I'm going to introduce the guest, which is already redundant because he's already chipped in earlier. Sorry, Dom. It's the best-selling offer, Bomboa. Welcome to home, Bomber. Thanks coming along.

What kind of stuff do you offer? Is it what, coloring in books? Is that kind of thing? That's a sort of crime thriller thing, Dom, you know. Information pamphlets, that sort of thing, is it? No, it's like a fiction like a novel, you know. Yeah, sounds complicated. Right, let's get into it.

Tattoo removal, Bob. DIY, or would you use a professional? Oh, I'd use a professional. I wouldn't know how to start DIY. What, you just scrape out of it, Dom, or something? I think, yeah, you get a cigarette lighter, and you kind of melt it a bit, and then scrape it off with a batter knife.

Yeah, no, I'll go professional, thanks, Tom. I saw it on YouTube's. Yeah, all right Hey, speaking of cigarette lighters, ashtrays, you tried buying one recently, can't get him anywhere. Is that right? God, no one serves ashtrays anymore.

Blimey. So, I don't know where everyone's put in their ash, but in ashtrays, that's all I'm saying. Yeah, I looked in Argos, they got them. That was a nice item, Tom, thank you. Next one, number two, Euro millions. Absolute fucking piss take. Why?

Well, I never won it. I don't know anybody else who's won it. Have you won it? I've never won it. I've never won it. Well, you've got to be in it to win it. Yeah, you like it, you love it, don't you, Tom? Well, I've never won it, and actually, I don't know anybody else that, so it's a piss take, but I'll keep plugging away. Bob, do you ever feel lonely? Yeah, I suppose we all do from time to time, like. Yeah. More so than you used to, increasingly lonely?

Um, yeah, I'd say so as you get older, yeah. Does it bother you? No, I don't know. I'm all right with it. Maybe it should. Yeah? You're all right with it. You're like a bit of solitude, do you? Yeah, no, I'm all right with it, yeah. Yeah, all right.

Sometimes I'll go and sit in a church. Yeah. Not when there's a service on, just when it's quiet, you know? Oh, you're very lonely, Dom. You're very lonely. Well, I don't know. It depends on what you mean by lonely, didn't it? Never see anyone, you know, and...

I don't see many, but not as many as I used to. Miss contact with other humans. I'm not in the BBC as much as I used to be. No, you're not. I wonder if I'm being phased out. Right. You know? All right, well, that's the end of the episode.

Thanks for, uh, thanks for joining me, Bob Moore. It's a bit delightful. Cheer up, though. Thank you, everybody. Goodbye. Should I play the feature again, do you think? Just leave it. I think you should play it again, Dom. Yeah, there we go.

We've had some questions, Andrew, from past knippers. We have. Should we address some of them? We can have a look at a couple of them, I guess, now early on, yeah? You have some there in front of you? What I've got here? When someone says the word beach, this comes from Athletico Mark, which specific beach do you see in your mind's eye?

Or do you just picture a generic beach Like from a cartoon Or an old calendar Well, Redca Beach It was first that came to mind Is that your beach of choice? Well it was my youthful beach Yeah, Winkle Ciosk, donkeys, jellyfish and all that

But now Now I'm thinking of the Private Ryan one You know, that was a high impact beach High impact though, won't it? Robinson Crusoe Is Beach That's what I think A cartoon version of Robinson Crusoe

He's got long hair and he's got them cut off shorts. Yeah. And it's... But it's a cartoon. Yeah, that's where I think of... One palm tree. Yeah.

Well, this is interesting. Go on. John Sargent says, My TV roof aerial is now redundant with the advent of internet TV. Should I take it down or leave it up as an order to simpler times?

I think we've probably all got a TV area a little redundant on top of our houses. That's quite interesting, actually, Andy, isn't it? Because we've all got satellite dishes and, like you see, internet TV. and all that. Very few people

have TV aerial feeds coming at their houses now. Do they still pick anything up at those aerials? They will do, yeah, because you can get them free-view boxes that plug in directly from your aerial, so technically you could still use it, but I reckon I might go up there

and haul mine down and sell it for scrap. Hold on, no, Andy. If the zombies come, or the Chinese mess up the internet or something, Oh. You might be very glad. I might be the only one in the neighbourhood with an aerial and everyone will be desperate for a feed.

You'll watch a football? Yeah. Oh, you'll never get the football down the aerial, will you? Do you think the zombies will put a stop with the football? I hope not. I'd miss the football a lot with it. But, I mean, the zombies are coming, Andy. So, I mean, one thing that's...

It's inevitable, isn't it? It's inevitable. And, I mean, at least football will end. Do you know what I mean? So there'll be the final result. Eventually, yeah, the final standings. Who will have won football? I hope it's Sunderland.

That'll be ironic, wouldn't it? Isn't it incredible that since this journey of Athletic or Mintz died, that 10 years on or whatever it is, you can be sat there saying, hmm, maybe. Who'd have thought that would happen? Maybe we win football. Greg.

Oh, Greg. Not Greg. Not Greg. Nick, it's a Greg's question. from Nick, Nick Amit. Oh, I think he got in touch to say he would pronounce his name wrong as well last time, but Amat, I don't know. Do either of you have any freebies owing on your Greg's loyalty app?

I am due to receive a free baked good. Right. Through the app, because I've bought nine, I think it is, then you get one free. Right. So I've got that in the bank. Any big good, Andy, or is the restrictions, you know? any baked good can be a sausage roll can be a festive bake

it could be a corned beef pasty it'll be a corned beef pasty because that's my favourite how often you go at Greg's probably about once a week and what do you buy the same thing every time or do you fiddle about a bit depends when I go it's usually a corned beef pasty like yeah I like a corned beef pasty or I don't mind

the ham salad sub rolls they're nice as well tell me this corned beef pasty is it puff pastry or proper pastry Well, it's like puff pastry, I think I'm not a fan, Andy I'm not a fan And I don't have a loiterly card Because I've never go into Greg's

I haven't been in since I was a kid, I don't think Oh well there you are then A bit of difference of opinion there then Would those some more of them questions Later on? I've got some questions for you I just like to update my records Basically now and again

First of all I've asked you this before But I'll ask you again Do you regard me as a friend A distant friend, yeah, but it's a long... Like distant because the geographical distance between us. Geographically, yeah. You know? Yeah.

It's not like we can pop down the boozer, is it? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Would you come to me if you need... You're not getting into the celebrity club if this is where this is going. It's not necessarily going there. Would you come to me if you needed help? If it was... I already have today, haven't I?

I asked you to help me try. and set up this app or whatever it is. That's true. So I would come to you for internet advice because my son's can't be bothered anymore. Right. Actually, you kind of see me as a kind of a surrogate son. I didn't say that, I didn't know.

No, I didn't not say that. Right, no, we'll take that as a maybe. What would you like for Christmas? I would like liqueur chocolates. Oh, is that all? That's all, yeah. Because I've got a massive, and I mean massive, bag of foam bananas and and shrimps that are going to last me from now right through Christmas. So, um, I would have asked for them, but, uh, no, I'll have liqueue with chocolates. Are you going to get me any?

I might do, uh, it's quite close to Christmas now, so they probably wouldn't come in time. Um, do you, uh, do like marzipan fruits? Marzipan, nah, not so much. Not fussed. Don't let marzipan. It's all right. Okay, fair enough. I tell you what I'm getting for Christmas because you haven't asked. What are you getting for Christmas Sunday?

I'm getting the Ninja Kettle. Oh, you're going into the Ninja Range? Have you seen it? Well, I've already got the Ninja Air Friar. Yeah. And I've got Shark vacuum cleaner. Same company, Shark and Ninja. Right. A lot of people know that.

Didn't know that. Ninja Kettle, it was half price in the Black Friday and it'll heat your water up to specific temperatures. Doesn't just do instant boil. You can do like 80 degrees if you want a hot chocolate or something. Right. Something you can drink quickly.

So, yeah. What's its maximum heat that it can do? I'm going to have to Google that. I mean, it can water go over a hundred. There's nothing higher than a boiling point, is that? Well, it's funny you should say that, Andy, because I got a new one of those taps installed two days ago. You know where you get instant?

Oh, one of them wankers taps? It's like a wanker tap, yeah. And it reckons it comes out of a hundred and five. But I thought that's not, you can't, there's no such temperature. Anyways up, talking about kettles, Andy. How much did you pay for this ninja? You said it was half price. It was down from, it was down from 99 to about 58.

58 quid for a kettle? Yeah, listen to this though, right? Six preset temperatures ranging from 60 degrees to 100 degrees at the touch of a button. Digital display provides real-time temperature readout as it climbs to your self. selected preset. Fucking entertainment as well as everything else. You'll end up just you. I'm a bit jealous.

I'm a bit jealous. Listen, quickly boil one cup in under 50 seconds. Rapid boil feature. Fuck. Now that is good. Now, Andrew, can I tell you an interesting kettle? No, it is a question, actually.

For the last three days, we've had no water in where I live in Tumbridge Wells. And I went out. So can you tell me, why did it lead, in Tumbridge Wells, why has it led to a run on electric kettles? Because people are boiling the water to use for washing, washing their bodies.

There's no hot water, is there? Well, I've got hot water. The reason is, Andy, because it's a bit of a stupid question. The reason is, is because Tumbridge Well, is. full of wanker taps. So if you've got, if you've been relying on a wanker tap, you don't have a kettle. So I, it's like one of the first, one of the first, no many times I thought it was an advantage because Sainsbury's two days back, it was apocalyptic people trying to get water and that.

And all the kettles had gone. But it was one of the few times it's been good to have been on the telly like, because one of the, a young lad, an assistant said, can I help you? And I said, I'm trying to get a kettle. What's going on? I didn't know the water had been to end of. So he went back into some warehouse or whatever and dragged us out of kettle.

Anyway, so thank you to him. You got down the fucking river and get some water. You're a fisherman mate. Incidentally, and the two things. Mine was 18 quid, Markell, all right. But secondly, I enjoyed the experience of having an old-fashioned cup of tea

rather than a wanker-tap one. It is better? I thought something, you know, might be... Listen up, Peter Beardsley. He's been in touch handy. Good. I haven't heard from him for a while, I don't think. Shall I tell you what he's...

till I read it out for you? Well, is it not a cassette or something like that? Oh, it is? It is a VPG or something, so I can actually play it. Yeah, press play about now. Okay. All right, Bob. I thought I'd check in.

Now, a quick chat, you know. Just up here in the spare bedroom, wrapping up a few presents from my grandchildren. And the wife, of course, got the kids some hot wheels, candy floss maker. And I like this small. all you're doing it and it's a joke thing like a jockey-joke-joke-joke you press a button and it says

oh shit your pants you know it'd be a fun like if someone's farted it uh the wife's got to sell at the moment for leg bandages so can't make much progress with the rat in at the moment Alright, I just noticed a chaffinch on the lawn out of the window there. Oh, it's flown off. Probably got to Turkey or Libya. Long flight, that's all. Hope it gets a nice juicy worm for a journey. Right?

Wife reckons the foreign lad next door has been trapping the birds, you know, they make cakes with... So I keep the ass peeled about that, you know, I doubt it very much. Oh dear. Dog dirt. So what's been happening? Yesterday there was a knock on the door. It turned out it was my mate, Daniel Farquire, you know, manager of Leeds,

and his nephew, Lord Patrick Bamford. So he knocked on the door and I answered. Greetings! Herbert, greeting Herbaird'sley. I've since the neighbourhood looking for a mouse costume, so I thought to visit her and say hello. All right, then.

All right, Lord Bamford. Oh, the fuck is that at the door? And what's all the secret chit-chat about? That's the wife says. I should send you far back, and Lord Bamford's come to visit. Well, invite him in, you egotious night creeper. So I showed them in the TV room

where the wife was sat in a carlagan and knickers giving their legs a good airing, you know. Hello, Lord Bamford. I say what's a delightful pleasantness it is to welcome you as into my humble folklandaboard. Would you care for a couple of soft boilers or even a four-egger omelet either of you? Farquhar.

That's very kind, Frau Beasley, but I'm on the Mungaro. And my... What the fuck is this point? Yes, I'm on the Mungaro. And my appetite is how you say shot or shit. What about you, Patrick? What's about fumbled eggs? Would that be possible?

Fambled eggs. I'm not aware of that dish. Pray fill me the fucking in. You know, fumbled eggs, where you fumbled them in. in the sand with a fit of fatter. Fambled him in the fan with the fit of fatter. I think he may scramble eggs, love. Yes, fumbled with a foffy coffee, if possible.

I'll go and do that. You don't want anything, love. No, Peter. Just pass me that dog bed to cover up me downstairs. There you go. I get them make some then. Sir Daniel, how's he going with you at Leeds? It's going very well and I find the challenge most rewarding.

Did you catch many birds this summer? I am not knowing what you are meaning at this moment. You know, for your cakes. Patrick. Daniel doesn't eat cakes because he's on the Fandallo. Oh look, on the table. That's Fott fields and a Fandy Floss. Can I have them? I love Fandy Foss.

I think these presents are for the grandchildren, Patrick. Don't be so rude and disrespecting. AI folks, I use the scramblers and a toffee coffee. Oh, but I love fucking Fog wheels and Fandy Foss. I'll buy them for 50 quid. You look very poor. I'm sure you could do with the money. How fucking dare you say that. No, no, Mr. I'm sure he meant nothing by it.

Shut the fuck up, Benfess, and leave this one to me. Listen, Lord, fucking Phamford. I suggest you take your O.T. fucking face out of this house before I lamb you so fucking hard. Your tongue pokes out your ass, and your eyes go milky before turning into hardened fox, Todd. Patrick's start. Patrick started to cry.

I apologize Apologies, Frau Beasley We are in the act of leaving Well, I couldn't resist So I pressed the button on the little unit Who just shit their pants? And the wife Had a good laugh like, you know

Mrs B Passes Passes their megsia, Peter And you're going to have a go on my fronties While I get them down my neck So that was at me here And I've been, wife not in such a good mood now really so I'm keeping out of the way I'll tell you what I'll

do a couple of jokes from my old joke book before I go right here ready what is a difference between a rabbit and a plum they're both paper apart from the rabbit they say time flies like a narrow fruit fly fruit flies fruit flies and Like a banana. Oh, there's a wife. Get down here, Peter, you fucker. Yeah, I better go. See you, Bob.

One Peter B.C. The only one Peter B.C. See you, Bob. Oh, well, thanks, Peter. That's nice. It's nice these gun visitors. It is nice. I was a bit sad,

because I wonder if Daniel got his mouse, costume that he was looking for. Perhaps we'll find out next time. Do you fancy your quiz? Go on then. It's a bit like the one we did last time. I've been looking at the top 40 chart of yesterday year. Yeah.

And you need to tell me whether these acts from... It's the 1st of December, 1974. It is 51 years ago today. And here's some groups or singers or whatever. And you tell me if they were in the chart or if I've just made them up. Okay. Number one, sneaky Peter. Made up.

Made up? Yeah, I've made up. Sneaky Peter. Well done. Oh, I've got a little thing to play whenever you get it right and get it wrong, haven't I? Fuck, come on. Where is it?

Fuck sick. It's a little ding there. Well done, yes. Correct. That was worth. It's worth waiting for, wasn't it? Don't you? Feels good.

Second one. Splinter. were Splinter in the chart Yeah, they were riding high in the charts, I reckon. Do you remember Splinter? No, but it rings a bell. Splinter were in the chart on December of the first, 1974, with a song called Costafine Town.

All right, here's another one. Candlelight Strategy. It was candlelight strategy in the chart in 1974. Bear in mind, this is the era of the three-day week and the loss of electricity. No, you're trying to push me one way, so I'm going to go the other way, say no. You think I've made that up? Yeah.

What does that mean? Where's you got it, right? Oh, right, nice one. Number four, hello. Was there an act called hello? Yeah, of course there was. Of course the one. Of course the one.

Fuck me. Yeah, there was, yeah. Check me out. Their hit was called Tell Him. And finally, the train operators. train operators in the chart or were they not? No. You think I've made that up?

I think you made that up. Bastard! Five out of five. Hey, that's a rare occurrence, isn't it, Andy? Yeah. It's a nice thing for me though, isn't it? Andy to have got five, right? I'll try the ding noise again for you because you've got five out of five.

Here it comes. There you go. Well done. Well done, Bob. Yeah, I mean, you could have even considered celebrating me victory with the John Homsk. No, we don't need to hear that again. That's enough. Thank you, Parsons, for your attention today. Thank you very much.

Yes. Thank you for bothering us. And we'll see you next time. Goodbye.