Athletico Mince - Ep. 52 - Three Foot Christmas Tree

Episode Date: December 22, 2017

We've got car-scrapping chat, a look in on the British Managers Club, Lenny Biscuits visits Argos, Barry Homeowner sings his CV and there's an update from Peter Beardsley… Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See out for details. Right then. We ready to go. I'm pretty much ready when you are, yeah. It's funny when you do something, there isn't that moment that says, right, go, you know, isn't like lights down or anything. Is it, have we started? Is this it? I don't know, it's, it's, it's, I thought, I told you in a bit of a toe and it begins well, you usually start off a side. But you'll not do the side, you're going then. He said you're a bit sick of it. I've been sick of it for three months.

I tried to change it to the sounds of the circus. I'm in a really bad mode, Andy, so you're better. There's a lot of responsibility on you. Just do the side then. All right, honky-tonk. All right, honky-ton Yeah? Alright, honky tongue. Got you talking to me, didn't I, I said, I had bad mood.

Yeah, what are you in a bad mood for? Because they're just booted as if the train were in the explanation. Oh, you smoking or something? No, they booted all of us off the train. And then I got, You're smoking. I got on the train, we were meant to get on,

but I didn't know whether this new train was gonna stop where I needed to get off, which is what a Louise's. Right. Got off at what Louise's. I haven't had any breakfast this time. Stalkers charted up by the way I tell them people where you get off the trend. I didn't tell them where. Oh I say the main. Yeah but I mean this is where it is a special recording the day aren't we. Then I went to star books, I will name them. And I got an egg sandwich. Right. to try to eat it on the street. Just an egg sandwich.

Yeah, but the bread was so crumbly that I picked it out of its little plastic thing. And the 78% of the sandwich just fell on the floor. So you're naming and sharing Starbucks here. And then this podcast is a vehicle to name and ship. Well, I should know the national corporations and their piss-pull-assomages. Hey, big business up yours is what I'm saying really. Now, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying this into business.

Some big business. Some big business. And then I got out of the the the secret entrance to seeker Trantrach. The secret entrance at Wartlowys and they've blocked off the road to Possessions. Right. So I had to walk all the way around the old three eye building. Right.

So yeah, I'm in a bad mood. So don't say it may, mate. What about I've done it now? Yeah, well, yeah, you have. So, sounds of Sunderland. Okay, let's have that then. Put me in a bad mood as well. I'm taking you to the hairdressers.

Oh, all the maccoms. All the maccoms. All the maccoms getting the rexmas bowl cuts. You know, yep. So, here we are. This is what I overheard. Are you going anywhere nice this year? Pff, I'd never completed that.

Yeah. That's just, there's not going anywhere nice. This one, maybe they're going, I'll tell you what, they're going the races in York, let's. Just, maybe they're going, I'll tell you what, they're going to the races in York, let's say that, but they're going to stop off at the Wey-Traw's Car Park.

How classy is that? And sitting the car park and having the dip as, but how's your jacket? Is he still pissing sideways? I have put a couple of foot marks on the carpet by the bath, and if he gets his stream right, he can get more of it in the sink. What you having for X-mas dinner?

Roast chicken or a dip or tower? Could you stop snipping a minute whilst that's not not in the sink? I've got that terrible cold. Oh, that vapes smells nice. What flavor is it? Alciation cushion? Oh, it smells so bad, give it a pull on it.

Okay. So that was my morning watching the macoms get the bull cuts. How nice for you. Piss inside, where's he? Yeah. Hey, I've got a couple of nymphs for you at the chose from. If you want to do that. Are you so fat that if you sit down and you're in it and on the toilet that it would all go all over your thighs,

are you not that fat and they... I'm not quite that fat yet, but I suppose that happens, doesn't it? Wouldn't you think? You're sitting down, would you not just like kind of really lean forward so that your Douglas sort of pointed into the pot? I'm maybe, but I mean,

but then there's the danger of shitting out the back and all right, look, I put last week's podcast was foul Andy. Well, does your fault look mine? I take full responsibility. So let's keep stay a clear of the back of the back. In a free, please. In a free episode. Thank you. And it's my fault for even going there with that there. Oh, look, I'll give you a couple of names you can choose from. You can be, first one is International Adam. He's 45, he lives alone in what he calls a penthouse, but is actually a bed sit with a massive

window overlooking the local tip. He does 14 hours shifts for six months of the year, but he spends the rest of the time traveling around the world on his own. He's got a blog and an Instagram account and he's writing to look and women in the eye. Okay, well, it's a national Adam further. Very much like the fact that he can overlook the tip, and a massive window, big window,

he said, and he overlooks the tip. Yeah. I think I've told you before, I love the tip. Me too. I love the rules, the regulations. I love watching the people sneaking shit into the wrong, the wrong black bag. You can spot them, they look so shape-ish.

Lots of cardboard and stuff at the unspeporated, but they're putting the black sack in. Yeah, I've never done that. I haven't yet. I make it in my life. The mission is to get past the guards at the tip. Do you know what I did the other week? Speaking of a West recycling.

I kind of addicted to this. Scrap me, car. What you scrapped it? Scrap the tuk-'m kind of addicted to this scrap maker. What you scrapped it? Scrapped it, took it into the scrap yard, got 140 quid for it. I'm addicted to it. Well, you've done it once, is it? I've done it once, so you show you. I've got a year and a half to do it again, but I haven't got another car to scrap.

I might sort of try and pick up a 300 quid car and then scrap it for 140. It's 160 pound loss but I think the 160 pound is worth it for the experience of going and scrapping a car. It could be, it could be. Could you get it put it on the scales and the weight and everything? Oh you get your money's by weight so you get a heavy account, you get one minute. Yeah, you get the money, you get it. Yeah. I don't realise that well you know it doesn't just have to, if it's the scrappy out experience you want with the weighing more you get, yeah. I don't realize it. Well, you know, it doesn't just have to, if it's the scrappy-eyed experience you want with the weighing and all that, you could start clambering on church roofs

and getting the lead and all that stuff and copper and getting in like abandoned houses and that and getting the copper piping. Yeah, you could start doing that. It seems like a lot of work, but I'd rather just buy 300 pound car of gumtree. Okay. And then scrap it.

So if you can find a car on gumtree that's less than 140 you can make money. That's a profit. Yeah. Although if it's under a quid it's probably a non-runner. So how would you get it to the tip? You push it. From your big arms. Yeah. Yeah. For gift. Or get some mates and help us out. Yeah. With your monkey arm. So how far's the scrap yard from your fungaler? It's about two mile. The last bit's downhill, so that's quite easy. Oh that's nice, I think. I could free wheel it.

Once I've pushed it like a mile and nine tenths, I could get into the handle it off and just free wheel it down in the yard. Yeah, put a lot of wear on your slippers though, pushing it to that downhill, you know what I mean? Well that could just right them off as they attacked the lookable. Oh they attacked the lookable. Because that's're taxed as a lookable. Oh they're taxed as a lookable.

Because that's a run it as a business couldn't I? I like that name because of the net but are you offering me any others? I don't know the one yet. In the National Adam, or you can be crackers, McNackers. Yeah. 45, his testicles removed and replaced with a pair of clackers from the 1970s. Do you remember clackers? Do you remember clackers from the 1970s. Do you remember Clackers? Do you remember Clackers from the 1970s?

Erm, he spends most of his evenings down at the ice rink disco in a vest in a pair of loose shorts, clacking away in time with the music as he skits round and round. Right, he oh. So he's not a smooth glide or other one, Clack? No, he's not. Well, he kind of glides from side to side,

creating the clacking. Yeah, clacking on the back. Clackers, knackers weirdly. Was he wearing very tight shorts? No, very loose shorts. Sorry, loose shorts. To allow the clockers to sort of freely bang against one another. I'm going to choose international island because I want to be looking through that window

now as we speak. Yeah. Do you want to be called something different? No, you're on the opposite choice. You could be toddler baritory. Yeah. He's inherited permanent earache. Now that's a very unusual thing to inherit, isn't it? Not an earache. Yeah. But he has. He reads murder mysteries all day. Which reminds me, have you written any more tabt

the Huntly mystery? I haven't, but I've got one of them, one of them kids books out like David Walliams has done. Right, what's your call? Uncle Bastard. Right, he over. Do you want to hear about Uncle Bastard? Yeah, of course. I'm bringing up later on, but he's a drinker. He sells cutting shut cars on Facebook, marketplace. He goes up the club on a Sunday dinner.

I'm going to watch the strippers and he makes his nephew stand outside in the street. Oh, right. And he's his story. It is journey. So what is the story, though is journey. So what is the, what is the, what's the story though? They lost a goblet? It's basically just that, it's just, it's just don't go bastard, go on and be in a bastard. All right, you are. It's kind of a stream of consciousness or other than a carefully plotted story. Of course, because the kids like that. But it'll

be on baby say one next Christmas, dear next year. So that's good. Okay. And he, he told the baritory, he raised the mystery bird, he's all day in his shower. Yeah. Yeah. Or you could... now I've lost my rest of my description of him because of Star Book. Because of the train. Because of the train, yeah. Yeah. You couldn't be unit XB45, yeah. It's a sex robot built in Bolton. Now his off switch is a bit dodgy and part of his first is melted, right? Looks a bit like Andrew Neal, you know, politics. With the big head, Paul. Yes, man. Very nice manners, though. Unlike Andrew Neal. Well, you said allegedly. I can say that.

Oh, I don't think you have to say allegedly when six or sevens not got bad manners. Well, I don't know. Have you met any celebrities who have got really good manners? Yeah, I'm Brazil. Well, you've met him, have you? Yeah. No, I don't, but have you really? Joey Barton held a door open for me once. Really?

And talked about it. And then stopped the faggot, and he was very, very demoea. All right, I'm going to do a bit of this stuff, right? Festive. Press and observation, comedy, and joke. Right? Cosymodel goes into a bar, and that's for a glass of whiskey. Bells are right, says the barben.

Man, you're on fucking business, says Cosymodel. The barben is so shocked, his brass-hand falls into the sink. He he he he. A skeleton. With a brass-hand walks into a bar, an order's a beer and a mop, right? Barman is so surprised, his brass hand falls off and damages the Pyrex ball he's using as a drip tray. Oh, listen, yeah, try this one. All right, rabbit with a brass foot or just carrot juice at the pub, yeah. Bam says we don't do carrot juice, rabbit with a brass foot orders carrot juice at the pub. Yeah, Bams says we don't do carrot juice. Rabbit leaves comes in the next day, right?

He says, I love a pile of carrot juice. He's a lot of I don't, I don't sell carrot juice at all yesterday. Look, if you come in here again, I'll weld your brass foot to the bar still. Next day comes in, goes up to the bar. He says day he comes in, goes up to the bar he says, have you got any welding equipment? Barman says no he says, well can I have a glass of gallot juice then? The barman is so exasperated, his brass unmelt and his face turns in on itself revealing two little reds, one flies off to the Barclays Bank and one to Lodgeblank. Both explode and entering the respective buildings.

So that's a bit of brass and work and a... Very festive. You know, they're just old jokes, right? Very festive. You've enhanced them a little bit with brass and stuff. I'll be the sex robot, that's all right. Yeah course you can you remember as an M? No, I do. The X-B45. Yeah, I'll be M. We've filmed a live show that we've been doing around the land this year, haven't we? And you can now see that for yourselves for the rock bottom price of just 99 PENSE plus VAT. Oh, right. Yeah. It's through the, yeah, it's through the popular online Patreon service. So you'll need to go to www.ethletico-minz.com for further information about how to get that. What does Patreon mean? I think it's just one of the made-up words that they call websites because all the words in the dictionary have now been taken up by.com every word in the dictionary is gone.

Did not say a bell called Patreon games or something. You might have a Patreon. Patreon, Patreon games. That's Patreon. It's like that online. I'm out look up Patreon whilst you're doing the advert. So can I have that? That's pretty much it.

Anyway, it's a 75 minute live video of me and you ticking about. We took all the foul stuff out. We took the really unpleasant stuff out and it's 99 pens, you know, what's what's 99 pens these? There's packed a match of tax cards, packed a match is, packed a match is exactly a mascot, it's actually because all is nothing important important. So there we have a WWDW.ethleticoamints.com, or you can follow us on Twitter, atathleticoamints and we're on Facebook as well and you can get more information about how to get your eyes on that live video. Hey listen up, I've got a new feature. It's going to really stretch me as well and because it requires me to do one to four impressions. It's not something because all are again, is it?

Not you think I should drop that? Well, my instinct was I should, so I haven't prepared anything. Some people seem to like it. I love to laugh. Hey! I got balloons! Puffuffles! And it looks so.

Anyway, it's cold and this is the first episode of the British Managers Lunch Club. Oh, yeah. It's a select band of the Old English Managers, right? Aladice, Hodgson, Moise and Pardew. All the grits. All the grits, right? So the meeting up for lunch at Rool's Restaurant in London, it's like a posh club and the old wood paneling

in that and schooled in a sort of food, you know? So that's a nice type of food in a school that, you know, it's like, trickle put in and that and schooled in a sort of fold, you know, so that's a nice type of fold in in the school You know, it's like trickle putting and I'll be that mentioned dumplings that sort of thing. Yeah, and they have one of those booths. I'm sat behind them, right? drinking some port and eating and I spy and much is poor is a nice pie there, but 90 quid. No, it's it's the do like Sew it Stairking can be pudding, you know nice pie in there but 90 quid. It's the do like sewer it's staking can you put in? Yeah, it's a good size as well Andy. I think it's 17 pounds. The further home for the

enclosed spuds and gravy and all that. If you want the jacky white to mark getting some around you get that for like two three two thirty two fifty. And where would you sit? Just on the floor. Sit on the floor, eating jacky whites, fucking, soot, knob. Yeah. Right, so first, so like, they're being like, one of those booths, virtually, so they're in like, suddenly, I am. Oh, no, oh, no.

I'm gonna second, I'm just writing down, just for me next kid's book, Jackie White, soot, knob. Okay. Oh, no, oh, that says Sam Aladai, says an impression, right? Thank you for coming today and congratulations to every one of us for receiving huge, sacking and signing on bonuses in the current year.

Now this is an able, the BMC, that's their British Managers Club, to have a capital pot of some 25 million pounds and we are here to decide what to do with it. Roy, you first. You're trying to a Royer to now Andy. Well first off, can I conclude you like Alan on his new job at Crystal Palace. There are lovely, then he could. Alan's at West Prom. Palace. They're lovely, they're not good. Alan's at West Brom. Yeah, I know. Exactly. Hodgkin's at Palace was good. Exactly. Will the foot off? That's not how he speaks, is it?

Will now do. It'll do. There's a foot off going to congratulate Alan on his new job at Crystal Palace. They were lovely soft touch and easily ripped off. Well done you. Pad you says, now I am at West Brom. You're the palace manager. Oh my, look how old are you? What division are you in? Do we play our matches away or at home?

What's the pay off? Any good? Pad you says, sure it will be a biggie Sam. Sam and I both ripped them a dog-todd when we failed. Are we enjoying a minute feature? It's a good sofay, yeah? So Roy says, result. Where do they play this palace? There's no clue in the title. Are they a Bristol club? Lovely little bicycle repair shop in the railway arches in Bristol. Pad you just ignore them Anyway, my first of all, Fank Towney for the lingering destruction he administered at West Brom

Delivering us both substantial cash piles and can we all reissue a moilsy? That's David Moils That will give him an easy ride in matches this season to help him get a full three-year deal and a lovely big bonus contract with massive payout at either end or here here now Tony pull his chirps in is he's he's he's supposed to be Welsh I mean a job at the mole yeah that'll. I'm out of the job at a mole. So could I have an advance of a couple of mill? Is this still there?

Six years of the line is dead, really, anyway. Until I take the swans, he's always gone south-western. That's fine. That's all right. I'm out of a job at the mole. So could I have an advance of a couple of mill till I take the swansy job? I should be able to sting them for 30 mill over three years.

Sam, of course it will be in the Kermin Islands tomorrow. To see, this is like satirical. This isn't it. It's like we got a private eye. So I'm getting a bit bored of it. David, isn't that noise? That's David Moise. Hey, thanks folks. And don't worry, Sam. I'll sell you Andy Callell in January in a heavily inflated fee. Anyway, I've proposed that we spend the 25 million on a Bitcoin starter called Britcoin.

That's a kind of currency that's backed up by fuck all and is destined to blow up in investors' faces. Oh, what we have to do is get out at the right time, like we always do and move on to a new scam. out at the right time like we always do and move on to a new scam! Oh, I'm struggling. Why? I think we should open a catering company and give them the contracts for our various clubs. Serve up any old shit then fuck off when the margins start to fall.

Alan, what about an online fashion retailer called Britlook? Blazes, ties, chris shirts, nylon suits, everyone says I look da bomb. So I could be the face of it, could run it for a year then go bankrupt, leaving our suppliers to cry into their soup. Lovely. Tony, I reckon we should release a perfume. Four men called Poulis. It's a bit cedry with a hint of pork belly. Don't pay our suppliers and fuck off after a year. Sam says, that's some great idea, isn't it, but what about this?

We set up a trust in Lichtenstein that pays us the interest tax-free, our mix loans towards tax-free. So we basically do fuck all and make a fortune. And they all agree. Oh, so sometimes. Right, let's get pissed and eat some owl. Ha, ha, ha.

Oh, that's a new feature, but that's good. I've struggled with it a bit. I think there's potential there. Some good voices. Over rightly in the voices. And a lot of satire, which I think we've been with it a bit. I think there's potential there, some good voices. Overriding in the voices. A lot of satire, which I think we've been lacking in so far. Bang. Noughtiness talk, which is a plus.

Yes, but you've introduced it there. Well, I did briefly. Well, just a reference. I like saying, right, let's get pissed and eat some owl. Yeah. Do you think you should have been owl or owls? No owl. I think it's best in here.

Well, yeah. Have you seen these pigs in Blankets? You can get there inside Yorkshire Puddin's. No. In Little Yorkshire Puddin's an individual pig and Blankets inside a Yorkshire Puddin. So the pigs in Pear Street, the sausages, it's a standard pig and Bl in blanket. What is it? What, I've got some wives' questions. I forgot the question. What do you think about the pigs in blankets inside Yorkshire Pudens? It's rude to ignore that.

And I will come back that because she wanted to ask about your Christmas dinner and that, and it's just reminded me. All right, okay. So sorry, carry on. I didn't know you could get them in time. And do you feel about them as a concept? Well, because of me bad art, thanks for asking. I can't really contemplate aband sausages and bacon,

and I'd be so, they're like, now in my mind, all those delicious things have lost the shame. I mean, I didn't deliberately bring them up to sort of torment you. No, no worries, because they literally have a look at it and I don't see what you're seeing anymore. I just see, you know, and the fat. Inside I just see like it means third art, re-third art, re-sale. Do you know, Andy, I saw Professor the other week from the television show I was doing, I was like,

Mr. Hart, the Hartman, UK's top Hartman. And I thought this was quite interesting, just in case people are interested in heart conditions and that is that it's only the arteries, right? Three of them. I think there's some more, but the three main ones around your heart. It's only those three arteries that fur up. Artrees in your legs, in your body, in your arms, they don't fur up.

It's just those ones. Yeah. And because, which was nice for me, he took an artery from somewhere else to put, to replace my big artery, what they call the witter maker, the one that you, this called the LAD or something. Right. So that was replaced with one from the other side of my body. Right. And it's an artery that can't fur up.. Oh right, so good as new. So why does everyone get this done then? No, everyone's school. No, everyone does not everyone not even people that have got fur arteries. If you this is an Unfurable artery you've got either why can't everyone why can anyone not just go in and get the that put where the fur

You can't it once it gets to I mean man was not even I should you nearly die before you get that done Well Andrew it's probably to go to the piss this far if funds were limitless Yes, I suppose we could all go in on our 40th birthday for To have but I mean there's dangers involved. You know they have to cut your freaking chest Oh, and what do they do? What what are they replaced this artery? They take out to the put the third one Did this swap more? No, do you know like I? So you haven't got an artery on the left hand side now?

Yes, I wherever I've got and I've got a I've got an artery that a non-ferring artery on my left hand side Where the meat that feeds me heart, yeah, right? They took that artery from the other side I want to put in when they took that out don't put anything it's like when they remove varicose veins from your leg They just pull it out and your blood just finds another way to go this is stressing me this is They just pull it out and your blood just finds another way to go. This is stress and me, this is. You know, taking a look at you, looking at the state of your under, I think you should take more interest in how health and these, some of this wisdom I'm giving you.

Honestly, sadly, Cut that out. Sadly, in the back of me heart, they were replaced with two veins because they can't fit new arteries around the back of your heart. Right. And the problem with veins is that they run at a different pressure to arteries. So they're really under, you know, it's tough work for them. You know, handling the workload of an artery.

Anyway, I'll cut this out and put it out as a set of podcasts on my garden. But we call it heart matter. Heart shite. From the heart. Heart talk. Heart talk. That's shit. Bob Morton was heart-wank.

Oh! Oh yeah! So, I can't find the wife's questions, but she puts them on me phone for me. So, bear with me, Andy. Sorry, this you have to fucking edit this. This is going to take a little Christmas Eve edit. So, Andrew, she just wanted to know, could you tell,

hi Andrew, she says. Hi Bob's wife. Could you tell me about your Christmas tree? You know, like what plastic is it made of, how tall is it, where do you store it for the rest of the year? It's three foot tall, it's three foot. Yeah, put it on a chair.

Oh, I can't afford a six foot tree. You've got a three foot tree. Yeah, it's white. What's that a tree? It's a pot plant, isn't it? Well, it's not, it's a fake one. Oh, it's fake. It's one of them white ones. Right.

From Woolworth's. Was it passed down nearby your mac and man before? Might have been. It was, wasn't it? So I keep it on a chair. And when I just keep it like under me bed. Have you got my on your bed? Yeah. What else is under your bed? Some magazines. Oh, and don't give that image up. You look you look perv enough as it is without saying shit like that. So what kind of

magazines are you? What you leave out for Santa and Randy is in Maccom and a grip, a grip for the Santa. And some whiskey for the Santa and some grips for the who? Santa Claus. Oh, good, he's not bad. Sorry, love whiskey. Tell me about your Christmas food and drink just generally, do you get it all up the asda or might you like venture to max and spend for your cheese or do you get it online? What will you be having? Tell me about your Christmas.

Your Christmas hope, you know, to get bailies. Pigs in, yeah, I've got three bottles of beer and I've got 12 tubs of sweets. Don't you say tubs of sweets, haven't you? Don't you say tubs of sweets? What are we talking about? Celebrations, refreshes, three celebrations, three heroes and three quality straight.

No, T.O. And which ones do you... Four of each of those, that's 12, isn't it? So I can instantly tell from that that they were on offer if you bought four tints. Yeah, we're to look them down to four quid. Four quid is the optimum buying price. Bang, four quid you're in. Four quid a tin or four quid for four? Four quidquid a tin so you got sweets you got a bit of a pig's in blankets yeah I just get the standard ones I don't get them in the Yorkshire puddles right what else

might you do means I don't like mince pies I've got some pork pies tell me about you got pie you want to make a pop pies it has the mini CNS breeze mini pot pies yeah right because I like to sea and spree's mini pot pies. Sea and spree's mini, right? Cause I like to go flash for Christmas. Cause there's a great big load of meat in those mini pot pies in a handy. You don't get much meat, but you get a lot of crust. You do get a lot of crust.

I've got a galopie, pork and egg. You've already bought that galopie. Yeah, yeah. But you're eating it already or you'll wear it to the prison. I'm not gonna throw it. You're not gonna throw it. do you poke the egg out? I'm not prepared to tell you not prepared to tell me. I think that's wise. So what do you is there anything like I bought a bottle of pot and a that I'm gonna have to say cost 80 pounds did you but million air ball no, but that's no. But that's... We don't even know. No, because that's my idea, because there's no pork pies,

there's no celebrations, there's an assagment when you're not my Christmas tree tree. It's a quiz. It's to buy a really old bottle of pork. I'm gonna ask Alan Brazillian what she'd pay for a bottle of pork. We'd probably pay for a grand money. And without it. So, well that's been a little bit of an insight, Andy.

Do you watch you have for Christmas dinner chicken? Do you have turkey? Turkey. Why don't we have chicken? Do you have turkey? You have a turkey. Why would anybody have chicken? Can you check it? Well, and this chicken, this turkey that you buy, is it frozen? No, it's a fresh turkey. It's a fresh turkey.

Yeah. You go at the butcher's for it there. Yeah. And how many pounds is it? It's a 11 pound. 11 pound. Oh, you're so good. Yeah, and how many pounds is it? 11 pounds 11 pounds I don't like this fervent question and it's quite It's lucky you're lucky lucky kids and you'll carve it with one of those electric carvers. Yeah God, that's a chance so and you get a Christmas pudding final one job, but no, it's not worth it

I'm not asking any more your questions. I'll read. I've got Barry O'Mourner. He's done what, again, it's been sent to me. He's done like a video CV. You know, like to try and get employment in that. Okay. This is touching, go in that. Okay. This is touch and go, all right? Right.

But does that mean this is the chances of me pulling it off of a touch and go? I am. So what's happening now? No, what does the phrase touch and go? Touch and go. Yeah, that makes it. That makes it go. Well, this. So I'll click the music.

Yup. Yup. Yup, magnificent. wondrous, majestic, breathtaking, and a homeowner. Yeah, I won't let you down. Make in love to a golden eagle. Yeah, yeah, if you need reliability, if you need muscle, if you need a creative pin, if you need design stimulus, if you need to impress, then how about a guy that will blow your lazy mind?

How about a huge man that moves stealthily than a tram? If what you need is a friend by your side, then come fly with me. I won't let you down. I'll just take you up, up, up. Up into the business sky. You'll feel, feel like you're making love make it love to a giant he's lantern yeah yeah got five GCSEs two A levels H&D and business management currently junior negotiator Winston's estate agents make name the Korean

fist 75% of deals close within their crucial 48-hour window. Certificate of superb from the Valentine Gym group, move a shaker, cross off Baker, I won't let you down. I'll just take you up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up into the business guy You, you feel You feel like you're making love Make it love in a sapt in jobsuits Perfect dental alignment Extreme sports are my casual indulgence Once up sailed from the roof of Stoke Library

I love full maroonies, love interior design, love artisans produce, love really intense Mind expansion hubs with fellow travellers Have the occasional Samarina nightmare, where an ape digest me But they are well under control of runies. If it's a pillow, it's going to be ducked down. If it's a river, it's going to be fast flowing. My name, my soul, is Indian. My physical self, is UK based.

My name, is Barry C. Homo, and I am part of your life story. I'm a homeowner and I am part of your life story. I won't let you down, I'll just take you up, up, up. Into the business sky. Well, Lando, it was touching goal. Okay now, it's, erm, it's impressive. Let's hope he gets work. I'm sure he will. Hii, Leniscuits here! Dores back from the Argos.

I was there at 4 o'clock this morning. I smashed the window at the front, walked in, set off early alarms, walked straight up to the counter, jumped over it, strode into the factory bit of the back with the meat, jumped over it, strode into the factory bit of the back with the meat all the stuff, helped me self to one of them fit bits. Pulled it on me wrist, synced it with my iPhone, put in me step target for the day, 8000 steps. Then I scroll

back towards the door, but then the place was swimming swimming were couples and the alarms are still going off. Get this, I handed the copper an envelope with 23 grand in it to cover the damage and the fit bits. A flashby wrist at him and I said, our quarter knicked it! War are tripped! War are tripped! War are true for all are true So are you shit? I thought that was gonna fit bit was gonna replace it someone I could have nicked it, but I fit bit I don't know he might be in quick fit next time on us and I'll see the same fucking thing Yeah, Peter Bees these two sent me one of his stories, one of his, I don't know why he calls him, an update, some of that.

Right, so I'll play that for you. Please do. We must have been next to his clock. Yeah, but where we go. No one, I'm just back from nothing on today. I got a set ofier caravan there used to be lovely, but the site has got a lot of well said bonuses to you on it now when there's only anyone up to their weeks. You know, I've got a school year pieceade, a princess, a princess, a princess, lowering a bucket into a well-like little group of kids doing meaming meaming over

your roses, and nice chicken wrapping in the cow and the way back in the chicken was nice and lumpy, really lumpy, lumpy lumpy, you know, not them thin slices like I did have a nothing frog that spat what now like I found them But the pump started making a whining noise and packed up They're pikes roasted and Plats that crack like so I've putting a little red on the frog's chin and stopped it shattering off the skin. Dog dead.

My son was a lad like he used to stay overnight in the car and you know, middle-air fishing together catching up magnet, white and falconed. We got a decent card with bite-led open and stone spud in the calivant. Must be there in the years since you know me in the last winter fishing. And it knocked me in the last two, really was last night. Inau'r yw'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i' mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd ind i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i'n mynd i' You all on the Albanian fellow side, so I filled those over with some banana skin. And then mother tried to get back to sleep, and he talked, talked me talk, shouting again, and I'm not about to look me on the shed, and I noticed too little ways, cricket stumps.

That was, so when I used to play cricket with me, Yn gweithio'r yw'n gweithio'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch ywch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch ymwch yw'r ymwch yw'r ymwch ywch ywch yw'r ymwch ymwch ymwch yw'r yweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio'r At the end of the call I got a few minutes to talk to him and told him I was going to caravan but he just said he didn't beat me but the place. And I go now and I know wife once had had boiled eggs so I'm popping out after I had to the wife's eggs. Good baton weed oil in there. So that was Peter's, that's enough to it. He sounds like things are looking up for him

because he seemed to be down. The last time we heard from him, but you know, do you think he was a more upbeat then? Nothing, definitely. Yeah, I think two thousand eight and he's gonna be a great year for Peter Badesley. So she understands what that?

I think his wife always gets the phone before him when the son for me. Yeah, I wonder if that's deliberate. Well, he's just trying to keep him apart, you think? I don't know, Andy. I don't know. Maybe he'll tell us one day. Before we go as well, I think we'll just mention the live videos as well, which you can get via our article minst.com. And it's 99pn plus V8a because V8a is important isn't it? The cable is all alive. What's in the video again? It's the live show we've done this song. I'm trying to think what it is like.

There's Barry Hormone a song, there's some Steve McClaren, there's some Lennie biscuits. Oh yeah because the people I've nerded could Steve McClaren what happened to him? Most of it is new stuff that we haven't done in any political New, isn't it? Pretty much yeah. Well, it's pretty much. It's pretty much, yeah. No, I'm not accepting pretty much. You've never seen one of songs being done before. Oh, yeah.

That's about the only thing that's been done. And it's got games that are going to be available. Yeah, obviously Mark Lawrenceson. Not Lawrenceson, then. That's why. Brand new stories, you never say, plus you get to see how it feels. And I've got a really appaillain boil on the side of me head

during it as well. Nice. And of course, Robtson Green gets to meet the rap-up-ed-need-es. Oh, does he? Scottish song. Scottish song. side of me head during it as well. Nice and of course, Rob's in green gets to meet their rough up in the woods. Oh, does he? Scottish song. Scottish song.

Oh, that stuff. Yeah. What a bargain. So, happy Christmas to you, Andy. Yeah, happy Christmas to you too. I hope you enjoy your fair and your tiny tree. Yeah. I've got an eight foot tree.

Hmm. That's nice for you. Well you know I make an effort. Well do you want to pull this cracker before we go? Yeah go on then. Pull it pull harder. Pull it pull it. Pull it. Fuck. Bob. Bob. and in ambulance.