Athletico Mince - Ep. 95 - Chicken Leg, Chicken Wing

Episode Date: November 25, 2019

Fresh news from the Gangs of the EPL, a Managers Lunch Club meeting, the Guru gets festive, Andy gets booted into his own car, and we receive two brand new WAVs Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/athleticomince. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to Athletic Omens with me Andrew Dawson. I hope today finds you well rested and without any imminent need for surgery. Imagine if you will that you are relaxing on the banks of the beautiful river-y in herifiture, the sun shining through the leaves of the old oak tree that you are laid against, the only sounds of the occasional fluttering of a mallard's wings and the gentle lapping of the water against the bank. Then suddenly you see a fisherman approaching, a very old short fat bloke breathing heavily and limping. His massive nose dripping mucus onto his dirty green combat jacket. He stands beside you and casts his line into the water.

You notice a large brown wet stain on the seat of his tracksuit bottom. This is itch's out with his arthritic fingers. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my co-host Mr. Bob Potemar. Oh, Bobby, Bobby. Should have brought a party. A rubber, rubber. Pants full of tougher yogurt I'll miss Dan not a man

Could he be any older? Fat shot another The poundland James Corden Welcome, welcome along Bob to this An of a theoretical men's. I think that fisherman was me. Was it? I'd prefer not to say it. I would want you to fall out with me.

Nice to say you haven't lost any weight then, never mind. And you know, you can always see me top off. Well have you got to really withered legs? Not lost a bit off me foot. Yeah nice trimming foot. My foot's got all slender. I've hurt me big. Senderer.

Well I hurt me right big toe. Did you? Yeah when you get older you know you'd stub your toe and it goes a bit further. That's gout man. You've got gout man. You've got gout man. You've got a gout bob.

Well about gout man as a soapy or gout man versus the joker. Yeah gout man come We've got a gout boop. Well, about gout man as a soap hero gout man versus the Joker Yeah, gout man come and help. I'm on it If with the soap hero films these days, you don't need to be that active because they all just use like a like a Yeah, like computer powers. Yeah, so he could do it from his big old gout I'm with her and I'm with her a quick given port give them cheese Leave it out gal men. I'm fucking bending my head. I'll leave you real marvel later on. I've got a request for you. What you think? You've got a quiz for me, have you? Right? It's called Doryongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongongong more cartoony in it. Pop, shepherds, peanuts, brine, oh yeah, butter and gimme just a little more time. I would have joined in there but I was sipping coffee, sorry.

Well I've gone down to B&M. Yeah, I'm very familiar with B&M. Well, that's exactly because I'm fair. I live close to a giant B&M Bob really It's even got the garden and outdoor department and everything used to be being cute now. It's B&M. Well that is a big change Not a B&M big macum. I look like next to a big fucking macum now listen So I'm taking you down those tender aisles Yeah B&M right? I visualise them now. Three items, not on sale, no special offers or anything. No tricks, put them in price order, I don't mind

up or down. First one is ah, and that's written on the box. Ah, Bisto, frozen shepherd's pie serves one. Frozen Shepherd's pie serves one Second one is three times a hundred and ten gram prints his drained tuna steak in Brie three you say three. It's those little thin, you know the little doors fellas The really thin ones yet 110 gram Andrew I say a three I visualize 110 grams 340 gram whole earth smooth peanut butter Which is your order Andrew so we've got shepherd's pie tuna drained and smooth But all earth suggests some kind of element of health in the ingredients So would it being client I think that would be the most expensive okay?

I like you think I'm gonna go for the cheapest being the Sheppard's Pie. Yeah. I'm gonna go for the beaners that's three tins of tuna, 110 grams. Is that a standard circular can of tuna? Yeah, it's slightly smaller. It serves one can of tuna. No, it's a tuna. Right.

I would call it the little can of tuna, you know. Yeah. Perfectly standard. Ha. No, it's it's a tuna. It's what I would call the little kind of tuna. You know, yeah perfectly standard Come on as the most expensive then the peanut butter and then the shepherd's pie He's there. It's just He knows his beard Your little face you brought the Be in it, baby! Oh, your little face, you brought the lovely thingy. I like me doing that, I was...

I'll be right back, see ya! See you then! Well, there he goes, he wanders off, waddles off, to be in them. Oh, that was so good. Gangs of the EPL and Jala, go for it, do the introduction and everything. Gangs of the EPL! Lillililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililililil you're aware Andrew of the trouble that was in the England camp involving rain sterling, Joel Gomez, yeah it all kicked off in the canteen and luckily I had a spy working on the gravy station that day so I can report on what actually happened and how it unfolded. Is it wrong that I want to know more about

the gravy station than I want to know? You're gonna find out a whole know more about the gravy station than I want to know about the story. You're going to find out a whole not more about the gravy station. So it was actually about two hours after the match, the city Liverpool match, and the Liverpool and city players, whereas I was just gathering in the canteen for the post match supper, yeah? Mo Salette was sat at the table on his own, capping on about his ankle injury, yeah. Oh, my bloody ankle, it's killing me, I'm telling you, it's the worst ankle bagging in the

top of the table, match it ever. Do you get me? It is the worst ever, oh man, it's like a cobra bite, I'll never play again, why is nobody listening to me, I wish I was dead. That's good impression of what's on it. Perfect. Close to the eyes, it's like he's in the room. So for me, no, the Toefe Brazilian one.

You know what he's stood on the table next to Mordansson? He's wearing a tight, white, three-piece suite suit. So that's a nice number of items to make up the suit. In the A&M, one, two, three. Nice, can't you? Very catchy. Red Cuban eel boats and he's banging two chicken bones together. Right.

Maracas. Yeah. And he's singing. Chicken leg, chicken wing. One is fat. One is thin. Chicken leg, chicken wing. It's a Liverpool wind.

Chicken leg, chicken thigh. Man, sit to your shite. Chicken leg, chicken wing. For me, no, it's king. And then you hear more, say, oh, my uncle bang. It's a clunker chicken leg chicken wing it's a Liverpool win oh wow what you listen it's really tough like a fire injury chicken leg chicken wing it's a Liverpool win well Gomez James Milner that's all going on right and Jordan Anderson are at the Gravy station, yeah

Gomez says where's Gomez from? He London in he I don't know And you're not you're not even a James right you're not even James What gravy do you recommend for cheesy pester twirls? Milner replies You want to thick a gravy that will adhereester Twirls. Melon that replies. You want a thicker gravy that will adhere to twirls. That rolls out the chicken gravy and also the chicken turkey gravy. The onion gravy might work but only if you use some of the gravy skin. Salas still morning. Oh

man it's swelling up like a fog in melon and nobody gives a tear. Can you put me please I am a'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i'r ymdw i you feel the I-Warm and cause you an all-appy. John Nonsense chips in. Oh, he's got that one about the right height. You are a couple of spools. Watch your belly while you're born. Like, 70 lch of light and an insert stick. That would be 80 pounds. Please, plus, more stitching crackers. And gormas, I think I'll leave it he says is like more like a cockney though

I think I'll leave it you know the cheese is pretty runny as it is in it if I need any I can always come back for gravy That's pretty sensible Blan young man what mill did you you select Jordan? Boy on fish and mus much like country style! With an antistatic sauce! Bring on the clowns, I'm getting ready to blow! Alright, nice choice. Well, Jordy James and Anderson go and sit at the table

for me, no, I was dancing at and start eating. A few seconds later, Rahim Sterling implied Walker enter, go up to the buffet, right? Now Rahim has his little foot still within that he stands on, you know, so he can get a better look at the food that's on offer. Well, just at that moment, Joel has had enough of Feminine or dancing and singing and he shouts at him, and singing and he shouts at him. Get down here! Get down off there you tricky little prick! Rahim turns round thinking Joel's shouting at him, yeah? What did you say? Are you all laughed busted?

It's gone! I'm dead! You've seen that again! Get down off there you tricky little prick! Well Rahim, jumps off his footstool, runs across the canteen, does a forward roll, clambers up but Gomez's body and grips him in a headlock. You know a little bit like that kid out of the movie Logan. Nah, it's a bit like him anywhere. Jordan sees this, whoa, what's he dizzy?

Who wants to top not now, not me, I'm half poly, stiny. Gomez, get off his will ya! But Raheem's grips on tight and starts jabbing a fork in and around Gormas' tits, yeah? More still capping on. My beautiful ankle, will I ever get to meet the Rital Kicks now? For me no, it gets back up on the table. Oh! Chicken leg, chicken, chicken wing. One is fat, one is thin, chicken leg, chicken wing.

It's a Liverpool wing, chicken leg, chicken thigh, man, city, a shite, chicken leg, chicken wing. For me no, it's king. Then for me no, it's a star jump of the table, right on top of sterling. And sterling loses his grip. Milner keeps the two of them apart. What? says Jordan. Right, you two, come with me my lord, come with me. This needs butch, not like a seconder screamer. In a hospice two pounds it's seven to one, please. So Jordan takes them away at a separate room. Milner hands Jordan a ball of liver and onion

gravy. You might need this skipper. In the room, Gorma's explains that he was shouting at Firminon, not sterling and sterling accepts this explanation, but they are both pretty angry still, Andy. Right, Nark, on Yoto, isn't it? Look, have some gravy and make sure you bite into the hard lumpy lumps. Ah, I love your lid lumps. Well the births it's at the gravy and biting at the lumpy hard bits and just

like Melna said it meant them both come over warm, cozy and dappy, yeah? More pops is out around the door. Please, I'm begging you, somebody for a doctor or at least a qualified electrician and gomers and and Steve, you just spewed up on me fucking electric, yeah. And Gomez and Sterling, laps so hard, Andy. It was as if every lump in the grave was a joke bomb from the Chris Kamara laughter and psychopedia. Give us a more chicken wing, let's finish with that.

Here it comes. Chicken leg, chicken, chicken wing. One is fat, one is thin, chicken leg, chicken wing. It's a livable wing, chicken leg, chicken thigh, man, city, your shite, chicken leg, chicken wing. For me, no, it's king. Oi!

And that's my friend was the true story behind the wift. I'm really sorry, that's the first time I've... There's a lot of coffee and black coffee. And I think that should learn not to drink during these things. So it was a simple mistake and it was just a simple mix up in the end. A simple mix up in the end. And as reported, the end of the song... ...and the song started it out. He sorted it out. Yeah, he's the calm head. Good lad. In it out, yeah. He's the calm head. Good lad. In it all, isn't he?

Do you remember I got a Chinese vacuum cleaner a while ago? Yeah. And I said it was going to be the future. My future. And it turned out. I've been it off. I don't have a tool to that. I've forked out for one of them shark ones.

Any good? You've seen them off, says. Very, very good. Revolution. Absolute revolution. The chamber part. Yeah. You detach that, so you can use it as a hand held. Got you. You can carry it around and use it, you hose the other hand. So the other day, I've added the car with it. Really? Yeah, I took it outside, held it one and I usually use a dust pan and brush. But I can use the, I can use the sharp now. So I'm leaning

into the car, hovering the floor. Yeah, it's got a duster attachment. So I'm dusting the dashboard and everything. Bam! What the fuck? Card door slams right off me ass as I'm leaning into the car. Pushes as right forward into the car. So I picked myself up, I've whacked my face off the handbrake, the mouth bleeding.

Yeah. This voice says, Senior, Oh it's Corbin, Corbin, he says, senior there bleeding from the mouth, beautiful red blood flowing down your fat chin. I'll take that red as a sign you're going to vote Labour in the upcoming general election laddie. Well

he caused it, you know what I mean? He bit the mouth bleed, yeah, that's probably legal I think, so be tooth loose and everything, there's blood all over the place, he caused it, you know what I mean? He bit the mouth bleed. That's probably legal, I think. So be toothed loose and everything. There's blood all over the place. He says, uh, I observed that you're brandishing the highly-rected shark vacuum cleaner under my government.

All of that will be free with vacuum cleaners shared among communities in a plan based on the Sunderland Bay Leaf Sharing scheme. You remember the Bay Leaf sharing scheme, where everyone gets a go. Yeah, and he looks at the shark and he says, powerful, is it? Got good suck, does it?

Yeah, I'm really pleased with it. It's better than the Chinese one, I had. He says, ask me my best suck. God, ask me. Good question. I'm like, what, was he made out of you even measure suck? Is it, is it? It's a throw a straw or something. Amps, I don't know. I don't know, and I don't. What what's he made out of you even measure suck? Amps I don't know no, well, I thought you might know but I said to him what

Odio measure he says as a number are you an actual idiot? So I just don't have a guess I just 20 20 things me best sucked terribly he went Laya the most powerful suck is a five and my best one is a four vote labor and get a fucking good suck The sets so was our mayor politics That's the election slogan I think so I'm I'm really this I was a bit dearest But then he saw a block across the road using the hedge trimmer And he's edge and he went over and put it in what they arse instead so I think I got off lightly really. All things considered. No that's always nice to say him and he's out campus in vote Labour and get a fucking

good suck. So there you go. I don't know if you remember the last episode we briefly mentioned John Omsk. John Omsk, the Albanian trans. Trans? It's about fella. Yeah well he sent in a wav. Nice work, John Omsk. John Omsk, the Albanian Trans. Trans, yeah. It's a bit of fella, yeah. Well, he sent in a wav. Nice work, John Omsk. Yeah, he'd heard it and he sent in a wav,

so let's just say you're that then. Hey, John Omsk here, Albanian Trans Ovalod. I heard you guys chatting about me on your podcast and I wanted to give you an exclusive. Heads up to my new tracks. First up, here's a collaboration I've done with Estonia's DJ Puzzle Numbio. We will commission to do this one for the United Nations World Toddler Day. This is going to be played in all the nurseries and the baby schools of the world

all day long on March 9th 2020. Yeah, I have a little kiddie, he's a sugar and love that. Hey, next up here's a clip for my brand new single, as you probably realize immediately when you hear it, it's heavily influenced by the Bosnian underground table and chair scene, as well as sonic influences such as the shits and the alarm. It's called this is this is this is this is this is this Yeah, that's gonna be out soon on vinyl and CD and also as a soluble song you can spray under your tongue ah ah I'm currently having many talks with Vodafone about the music that I'm one of their

advertising so I'm crossing the fingers I'm John Amstk thank you for hearing me Wow John Amstk Celebrity fan of the podcast in that fantastic Yeah Well Toddler Day

Well Toddler Day Thank the March for putting your diaries Yeah they're gonna get like When they are that June they're gonna be like coke It's gonna be on a loop non-stop all day apparently all the nurseries. So there we go What I was wondering Andrew is Two crime files have arrived from America. So I'm going to let you choose.

Would you like a crime file featuring the singer from Oasis Lane Gallagher? Or would you like a crime file that features Paul McCartney and Bruce Forsyth? I've got to choose McCartney and Forsyth. Oh well, it's your choice, Andrew. Crime Files! Get it now! The 1980s was a time of great hope and expectation. The Berlin Wall came down,

it turned aflame by the bangles went up the charts and the M42 motorway was officially open just as work started on the channel tunnel In London a small nonsense potry open just off the King's Road It was the owner Neil Hunts first for a into retail nonsense pottery four days after opening He had sold only four nonsense pieces the future for Neil looked grim nonsense pieces. The future for Neil looked grim. On the 18th of December, Neil was sat at his counter on the telephone to his bank manager. Oh, it's all about interest, is it? Well, does a fuck off noticed interest you and your

bank of Todd? Well, does it? Because you're going to fucking get one if you don't back off. This is Neil Hunt you're talking to, and I don't take kindly to Todd Worry as goodbye. Just at that moment, two elderly gentlemen entered the shop. It was TV's Bruce Forsyth and Paul McCartney's from The Beatles. So Bruce, you're looking for a nice part of ours for Anthia. I think it's a great idea and this place looks the business. Do you know what sort of thing she likes to look at? Oh the nothingfish putty. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha mumbling in my pottery, spit it out if you want to buy something or get out if you're just warriors of the taunt! My friend here would like to buy his wife a nice slice of nonsense for a birthday.

Can you actually afford to buy one of my nonsense clusters? You don't look as if you've got a penny to rub around your asses. Hold on a minute, do I recognize you? Hold on, do I recognize you? I'm Paul Mac and Macarnie from The Beatles, and this is Bruce Forsyth from the Generation Game on the TV. Do, do, do, do, do, do. I don't actually have a TV and I certainly don't infect my internals with what can roll music? What's your budget?

Go on, slap it on the counter. What's your actual budget TV, man? Get it, you, uh, did, did, did, do! That's 5,000 pounds in notary poncent pottery terms and you can take a photo of us for your wall to put the shop on the map. Right, right, well, what about this orange and blue glazed utility vase depicting Northern Farm machinery? It's a fucking pep and well worth 5 grand of anyone's money. Down the farm, where's the home?

Orange and blue, Miss Turner, this is for you and keep it too, deb, deb, deb, deb, deb, doob, deb. What's he on about? What does that mean he wants it? Oh, you sure she likes farm machinery Bruce? It's quite specialist. And Jimmy, he did, Jimmy, he did. I haven't got your fucking clue. I'll take it. Bruce picks up the vase and holds it lovingly to his chest. Paul Teller's Neil to stand next to Bruce and takes a photograph on his Polaroid camera. When it's dry, Paul and Bruce sign it and give it to Neil. You've made a good choice there. I admire a man who appreciates his agricultural nonsense.

How are you paying cash on check? We'll give you two grand and the photo should cover the outstanding balance. Oh, two grand, two grand for that fucking angry art masterpiece. You can take a hype to honky the clown shithaun and eat butter till you fart it out on to honky's fucking damn shoes Hey Mr. Potter calm yourself down it's a glue Wait, deal! Now it's fucking not! Now it's fucking not! In what part of this fucking new country is not a good deal? Fucking Norwich! Give me that pot! Neil grabs hold of the pot but Brucey won't let go

And you don't do, don't you, give it you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't you, don't But as he picks up the phone from his desk, Paul grabs the flex and wraps it round Neil's neck slowly tightening. BAAAHH FUCKING OUT! That's so fucking tart! Get off me! I'll have you know, my nephew- T- My nephew's teacher owns a Swiss army in knife, and my brother rents a flat above a machete job! This army is a knife and my brother rents a flat above a machete chop. You do, it's dibby dibby dibs. You won't get released by a challenge rims. Alright, alright, I'm taking your fucking pot, you tongue gollum.

Why is it always lickled me? My neighbor has wasted arms and then take his bins out for them. It's a waste. wasted arms and then took his bins out for them and went! Cheerio, Potter, now have a good day, won't you? Bruce and Paul leave the shop. I'm Neil Potter and I'm in deep. Neil Potter, Neil fucking hunt and I'm in deep fucking shit. The phone rings, it's the bank again. Look, I'm not going to get any more customers I mean, deep f**king shit. The phone rings, it's the bank again. Look, I'm not going to get any more customers when nobody knows a f**king thing about my nonsense

pottery. I might as well be selling lion's shit with the football I've getting. Now, no, I haven't got any celebrity f**king endorsements. I'm Neil Hunt not the fucking Armstrong! Then he remembers the photo. Hold on, I might just have the very thing, a picture of Bruce Forsyth and Paul Maccamacartney buying one of my pants! Park off! I think I might have a way out of this wall of shit. Now you fuck off whilst I can't take the press box.

I'm Neil Hunt and I will never succumb to Todd Warriors or the fucking CAC Bandits. So, that's secondly back to the 80s. Beautiful, just off King's Road there. Yeah, Neil Hunt is very much a man of our times Even though that was the 80s. This is the man we need right now Oh Is new You Don't put your pants

I don't think so, feel pretty good. Oh, your chakras are proud. I reckon they are. Well, but as we approach the end of the year, thoughts turn to the festive season and the ugly commercialality of Christmas. And the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas.

I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of Christmas. I think the ugly commercialality of year thoughts turn to the festive season and the

ugly commerciality of Christmas. Do we really need all those gifts we give each other Robert? What does it tell us about ourselves? It tells us in my opinion that we value possessions over love and Spoods will enlightenment. You might be right. I think we should take the chance now to remove some of those needless Possessions from your life specifically your life before they all dream of consumerism begin soon You are but Do you own a coffee machine? Yeah, I've got a little pot or bean bean cup. It's a pot one, yeah. What was the RRP?

Do you remember? It was the only cheap. I'm going to say 50 quid. 50. I'll take it. I think I'll be able to say all this podcast recently. You have a very expensive and very high quality iron Oh, I've got a lovely iron. Yeah, yeah, good. That's the indulgence. I'll have that as well

I'll come around tomorrow and think that and the coffee machine and you think it'll help me Definitely yes, you're feeling all happier. I've got a list actually bluetooth headphones 150 quinoa above laptop 400 or above. I've got a laptop. I love that. Apple watch. No. Played as version only. No. No, it's just thing. Rock sack? I've got a rock sack. 100 pound minimum. No, it's not.

No, no, no, no. Christmas tree, artificial preferably pre-lit. No, I've got a natural one. Sorry, go ahead. It's been very, very disappointing. I don't feel your shackle was turning in on themselves. Yeah, I feel a bit dizzy with my hand. I'm like, the ghouls will leave you now, Abuse. I'm fading away like a gas or a smell fading. There he goes. Hey, the ghoul row was just in that room.

The ghoul row was in it. Has he helped you? I was talking about you not having too many possessions. Oh, we've got, yeah, T we have yeah far too many it's really kind probably got Lord's Boid Millie now yeah well he's gonna take me coffee machine right which would be liberating yeah and also what else he wanted as well I can't quite remember he's gonna come in it's gonna come clean out busy yeah good British managers lunch club okay yeah interested very right well I was in British Managers Lunch Club.

Okay, yeah, interested. Very right. Well, I was in Cobb and Garden shopping for some kitchen gadgets. Doing, yeah, well, down, chopping gadgets, never mind. Carey-o. Specifically, I was looking for a Hong Kong waffle maker that makes waffles in the little spheres about the size of golf balls. Right.

And I think, in our wonder if you agree, Andy, that's a nice size for a breakfast item, isn't it? Beautiful size, you can just pop it in, and on you go, beautiful, isn't it? Well, I eventually found one, but I was knackered walking around, so I thought, okay, I'll treat myself to a nice pie in Roles restaurant.

Well, got lucky, Andrew, because I was put into the boob right next to a meeting of the British managers lunch book. You got big Sam David Moils Steve McClaren Tony Poulis Ian Holloway they're all there. So big men. So I'll tell you what happened. Sam, Sam maladies. First up thank you for attending this BMLC meeting. My treasure informs me that we are still knee-deep in cash and with Christmas sackings coming up I think we'll have plenty to spend in the forth coming year. All the members lick their lunch club badges and sing. Money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money.

So Steve, how's it going since you're exquisite, destroying exit at the QPR? Oh, says McClaren. Me and Casper having an absolute ball. We've started lots of new craft hobbies. We do tie, die, embroidery, paper, mashy, modelling. It keeps us nice and busy. The other day Casper made a bead necklace out of tiny seashells, lacquered with a crispy sweet sugar icing.

It was so beautiful, I cried like a little baby mackerel that's lost its mum. Very interesting, Steve. But I'm thinking more about your plans for a new destroyer exit campaign. Right. I'm sending a box of fun and laughter bars to the chairman of Middlesbrough every week. It's a candy cuddle in a chocolate cat's suit. If he gets rid of woodget then I think I might be first in line. I'll insist on a five-year deal so I should get a bump up here when the shit it's the fan. Oh lick their badges. Money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money. What about you Tony, Tony Polis?

We're all off it. You would get the stock job and do a quick back and stab. Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, just don't know Sam. Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well,

well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, it was a lovely club, lovely people, lovely area. But I wasn't going to take them to the cleaners, so I said no. Beyond a Sam, I've got my eyes on emergency job. Beyond a Sam, I've got my eyes on an emergency.

Got them over a barrel rescue job at Everton, lovely club, lovely people, lovely area. Rick and I could take them for five mil. Money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money! Mark, why are you up to lad? Well, I'm wondering, that's not people basically who are well. You know, there's nothing mainly, you know, you're muttering and making sure I said next to nothing and they can't be tied down to anything in particular you know how it is but Mark what about cash generation that's what we're interested in

well I've got a couple of darts players and a couple of celebrity chefs on board for me bras for fellas idea you know I'm rotissing a j-string for the big lads I'm wearing it now and it feels good very good for any natural separatiu balls out a bit but that's all right o'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod i'r dod or and per minute per million that's one of the easiest gigs in the book you know almost set yourself the minute you take the job money money money money money money money money money money oh by the way gigs you can't wear one of me um huesy boobs bras because his back air gets tangled up in the book I thought he'd want to know like no what about you Miles he what's brewing

I got a few A islands in seven fires like Tony there. I'm after the big prize of ever and when the foreign guy gets the boot, great club, great fans, lovely area. And you can rinse them as easily as you can rinse a cabbage leaf. But if not that, I'll eat and look a leech when the foreign lad be els a fox up again. Or even knowledge maybe when that foreign lad beels a fox up again or even knowledge maybe when that foreign lad sinks either way it's three years guaranteed on a bumper lump when the fuck hits the fan. Money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, eh not the way what's your plan? We need to be pregnant with cash so who are you

going to fuck? I'll be good honest with you Sam there ain't that many offers coming through since all you got involved in the politics. So after Brexit I think I might have to look for a foreign job maybe in Europe wherever that is. Should work well for offshore purposes and after you've took your cut I can plow the rest into my side of flea breeding program because I reckon I'm on a winner using their pistol power vehicles of all speeds and uses could be a multi-million pair of out business. By the way Steve, I think you've got a bit of um, cuckoo on your forehead.

Cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, on your forehead there. Oh, don't be like that. Don't be such a plunk of sorrow saying that's my hair island, my hair! Shut the fuck up, Steve! It's time for a special announcement. A very special guest who brings with him today a sack of cash, the size of a fiat panda. Members, please stand for the recently paired off destroyer exit King of the Month.

It's Mr Mr Neil Warner in walks Neil Warner can slams a sack of cash down on the table Warner what's he the oh god he's a funny one Yorkshire that's where it is isn't he the bit you know yeah so so um um love that money pitlabs and let's party. So what happened to Cardiff Neil? It's a lovely glow, lovely lovely people, you know, lovely fans, you know, lovely area, lovely stadium, superb team, great set of lads. But you know what it is when you contract running down, it's down to get out of. Oh yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy League football. I love my Premier League football. I'll watch a bit of championship if there's no Premier League match. But only if there's no Premier League match. So you know Sean Dice with his wavs. Marcus is it Pellegrino? Marcus Pellegrino? West Damien. West Damns sense his tactics out.? So it's team of a Saturday morning,

Oh no, wow, I've intercepted one, because of me electroconnical genius. So it is a little sample from it, so Westam tactics, so we'll have, yeah. Beautiful. Sideways. Sideways. Sideways. Sideways.

Throw it. Sideways. Sideways. Keeper. Sideways. Forward ball. Sideways. Sideways. throwing backwards keeper sideways forward ball backwards and so on that's just a sample from it it goes up to 90 minutes yeah 90 minutes through the entire game yeah second by second second by second. Second by second. That must be wonderful for them. Sure, that's, I suppose, that's kind of like a little dig at some of the recent West Ham performances.

Yes. That's satire. Yeah, but it meant, it's meant, it means no harm. It means no harm, because I think they're going to get dig themselves out of it. There's some good players in there. There's some worse teams in that league, isn't there? That's a bonus. That's a bonus for this one.

Alright, thank you for listening to this one. Thank you for watching. And see you around. Back soon, bye bye. you