Au Parloir - Épisode #122 - Alain Guimond

Episode Date: December 28, 2025

Dans cet épisode, je reçois Alain Guimond, vétéran des forces spéciales, survivant d’un lourd passé marqué par des abus dans l’enfance, des traumas militaires en Afghanistan et une dépendance à l’alcool. Après avoir frôlé la perte de son couple et passé plus de 10 ans en thérapie, il choisit aujourd’hui de briser le silence, de parler de santé mentale et de redonner au suivant.Un parcours brut, sincère et profondément humain. Hébergé par Acast. Visitez acast.com/privacy pour plus d'informations.

Hello, everyone. Here's Cedric Bergeron, again, in the merveilleuse of the machine 4771 at St. Terese. Welcome to a new episode of O'Parlourl.

www. www.cederick-Bergeron.com. Newvote, we've all right-of-the-court all the information. At least on the Patreon, which is my site paying where you have access

to six weeks in advance, without publicity. So the channel YouTube, my resso, all the track also at my career of Morris,

The link for Vatement-O-Parlower, T-shirt, casket, in collaboration with Anro. Company of Vettements Quebecoise

who do the Vettements-O-Parlower. You've got the promo-Parlower 15 that's off 15 for Sandra Beck that's on Rowe

or on the Vettements on-Barr-W on podcast, a big podcast, super interesting. It's the second person,

of memory, it's the second person who has made part of the Forces Armies Canadian. He has a new layer

We're talking of unity of elite, the GTF, all that. A parkour that's almost like many more of my

inviative, with an adult malveying. In this case, a priest proge of the family,

I think I don't have no reason to make a age of, at the age of eight years,

it has been a year, that's a guy who has try to deal with that, who's that he's

in the bodybuilding, in the sport, who he doesn't know his place, who has

an appell of the forces army Canadian, where he and then when you

become a soldier of elite, it comes with some missions, and when you're

already these bobo psychological, a mann I'm a mann I think

that the car accumule and a certain limit and there's a casseur that's made

in his case with the auto-medicamantation with the boasso with the boasts. And that it's not a chum and a pair

genial but it's a guy that's decided that it was a guy who had decided to tryy on him I think he has

been quite chaste to have been in the army because the army has come even pre-in-charge when he had started to

mal-all-all-a. Fack, he had come to have done to have done with long-time. And it's a reprieve-

40-and for that finally, he could be face to his aggressor and to be paid

with the law. And it's a guy who by he even, he's at 90,

95% the menager is well- made, a manage is a man-fired, who merit

his fierty, a combatant but in all the sense, yes, a combatant

in the army, but a combatant in the life, when you see these things

like he has been rough, it's so much, it's a podcast that's a

podcast that's very that's not been not used because he's that he

has been in many many facet of his in the

descent, in the down the mountain where it's a certain place. So it's a

podcast that has been special. I'll use the word special for me. Sorry,

of the long intro, but I really really liked this episode that. Different.

We go a year. We're not in the middle carceral. It's a podcast

for me is very important in the reinertion and of the reinertation and the

rehabilitation. And I think that the victims, the people who have been of the consumption, as long as the people who have made of the prison, don't need to be reinser and see to rehabilitate, it's the case of Alain Guimon. Again one once, I'm repeat, I endorse not necessarily the gestures, the gestures, the terms used by my

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Hello, Alan. Thank you. Thank you. Have you, we've made of Gettino. Yes. I'm always at least. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, you know, I'm, you know,

that's, you know, he's pete a two-hour of char just for to come to us to-as. For me, it's, I think, I'm afraid of, so I'm sorry, so I'm sorry, to bring your time, to have made the route for to come to me to watch. We're going to touch to do things that we're doing, to share, um, we're talking, um, we're To detriment of certain auditors who

often us listen to we're not not really an event carceral with you today.

A day, we've said we've said, we're going to get to be but we're already a podcast

with a veteran of the army and the people have really really found that super interesting.

And it's what you but the difference is that with our other invite,

he, it's it's that's it's there's there's there's

There's an avant, there's a pendant, and there's an after, with the subject that we see that we see that

I think it's important. I part of the project that in saying that's a podcast on the podcast on

saying that it's a podcast on saying that's a podcast on the reinsertion and the rehabilitation. I think it's really more

the longer the podcast, it's sure that, it's sure that it's often, the universe carceral, but I consider that the

people who have or the victims, it's all of the people who have been able to re-inserry, to see part of this group that. I'm doing with

you do with my people, I'm going to where I'm at the kind of type of family we're going to we're still in today and even with what it's coming

because there are some things that not there but in the beginning 2026 and we're so we're going to we're going to

let's go you come to where? I've grown on the on the on the river city of Quebec, Levy.

Okay. I'm new at Kingston in Ontario. My father would have to do go to do so I'm new there's a lot, but I think

I had even not three years. We're emmaged on the Rive South to Quebec, and it's like you're a Franco-O-Otarian with the sand

blue in the vene of Quebec-We? A melancho that, and Gattino not all, it's not everywhere, it depends on Gatino there,

but there's almost 50-50, Anglophone, Fakhof-Fan. So it just a franglete, that's mixed at the

that's the way of the I'm trying to I'm in aribeau of I'm I'm in a family

uny I'm in there's a attentioning who was present I'm not I'm not

nothing at a level I've had a to my time of my food,

I've made some I've done in mass all that so that I'm a fratry

I'm a friend who is my year that's that you're family

classic Family classic, I think. Your father did what in the life? My father was in finance. Okay. So, it's the same,

he had been to do just to work in finance. He had been in science before in mathematics at C.JEP. And, I mean,

my matts in the course of the so what's what's going to get to be. Yeah, some of the little bit.

There's what that's coming in the transfer genetic, I, I, I'm not put up new but it's not

bad. Oh, well, my dad, my father, he has plenty of chfeu. So,

so, yeah, well, In the same battle, we're in the same co-hafer. No, I'd say I'd be a ben active. Probably with a TDA, the school. I'd say, I'd be able to see, I'd be there. I'd say, I'd have perhaps five minutes of attention,

offere per hour, or something in the same, you know, I've been to a sport, I've played a hockey, a little bit of baseball, I've been in a skoot, that I've really really, very, very, loved. So, you're a friend that had been to stimulate. All the time. All the time. It'd have to stop.

And I'd say Of this Of this That's That's the most Who, Yeah, Who, yeah,

That's the fact Of course Abusely at the age of eight- By a priest At the Paroas who was

That's proche The family He was He was I mean The house Familyial We were

On a There was There were There was There And the And the And the

Presbyteer So, He was I'm not Demanded Your Wants, I'm not I mean, I look, we have

some years of decor, but we're, we're, we're part of the same generation. Is, is it something

that's something that's a very present at your like, I mean, I said, I said, we're doing,

we're doing, we're doing a creche in our arm, and I'm remember, the mess of the

night, night, maybe, maybe, maybe eight, nine, ten years, I don't,

I'm not sure that you're not sure, you're doing, something that's, something that was you're, My grandmother

was very croient, who is been in a room who's in the real of the friend that's

my grandmother that my grandmere loved that my grandmother was a little bit more than a little bit more more today

we're saying we're going to be more of the religion. We're we're not no, so it's a

opinion personal because I'm there's plenty of people who are coming here

that the religion has saved and I'm for the religion you're You know, there's a good, there's a good, there's a

bad in all, absolutely. So, you know, it's... It's... It's... It's... It's... It's... If we're in fact that...

If we're doing it's not because we've decided to have an association, it's because the life has made in sort that we've had used the tool to do that, and a proof of plus, you know?

Yeah, well, a... Yeah, it's a problem, it's... So, so, so... At age of eight-year-old, it's... ...are to have... ...it...

...it... ...at... So he'd come to at a close for that's like a friend. Yeah, yeah, it was a

old man. Yeah, he had like the benediction of my grandmere and all the he was a bened amy in the

parvoise, and he was he was more young, you know, and the and the people,

he had been a bit, he had different a bit, perhaps, the prete more of the people,

that we'd probably be platt a little than a little in the microphone that's happened, so it's happened,

it's so, A night, we'd have a grandmaire at our house and all of that, and I had an habit of my mother, I'd have to be able to do with, the little transition to dodo, sometimes, it would have to roaches. So my mother would have to be with me, and she'd be calm the pompon a little,

and he said, it's beautiful, I'm going to be, we'll go, we'll go and we're going to do with the prayer. So, so it's there that it's had come to. That's it. That's a commenced. So it's a-oh. So it's a-during. I'd say I'd say a little

15 years. Oh, shit. Yeah. It's a start at 8. It's due to be 15 years. It's just in 20 years. It's been,

so for me, I've got to with the time. In grandizing, it's like if a kind of agressivit grandisant

to me abit more and more of patience. At the school, it's a lot, it's been to see,

I'm in direct to Moe Studio, and I'm a few seconds to you talk to you more-v-year command of who is with

we had two, three-million visioned by episode and he was there and sincerely if he had not been there, I don't know

if this project that exists again because they have really really had financially at the beginning with this project

and I'm to thank you to make this this particular that you compare my and there a lot of

people who make sure, hey, you talk of an affair of insurance, it's

what, in private the people me people, I'm so I'm talking to

you're to you compare my price, he's specialise in insurance So it's

so are the concierge in insurance life who are for a

reason why they're not that they're their speciality that

because when you get to a certain age as an if you're

a case and if you have a disease and it

is extremely difficult to quite impossible to have

an absolutely they they're they're they're there if you're

not sure that's assurable you can't that's assurable. Contact them. They, they, they

want to have an assurance of life. It's important for not to let your in the business when you should be there. Comparate my

prime. My view, I never, I want to get into the details of the agressions, of one, I don't,

to do you, don't, to do you, don't, I'm not, with that I'm playing with that I'm

don't, no, no, I'm, I'm not to get to be to live, I don't want to I, I'm not,

I think, that the auditors, it's their time, if there's auditors that allum, to be

to be to be to be to be to be inaud if it's so that's that you're in the idea, but, you know, it's a

beginning at 8 years, and I'm, and I'm a pattern of the prete and all, and I think at

this time that, today, I think, there's very few of family would be inclined

to let's a priest or an man who, you know, that's, you're probably you're

about the with who I do with who I do with who I do with them, and they're going to be a little guy in this moment, and they've been never offered to go ahead, and I think not that, I'd think he'd probably I'd think he'd love it. I'd like, I'd like, I'd like, but other generation, where we'd be

more, um, Alum, more conscient, I think, of what, I think, to put up. If there's, well, there's, well, there, you've made, let's make, let's make, laugh, that's my job, that I guess, and, you know, but, you know, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's

so, so it's it's a so it's a it's going to it's it's a long time in

in the parois and even if after that he's been after that he's always always kept with my

grandmother and he always been a little bit in contact with my mother also you know

it's you can't you don't know it's it's been it's a question it's

it's like it's a question I'm it was a prete it's he was a

he was em in parois he's a he's a he's fine At some, when he said, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I've got to have to be able to be that's a bit like, it's not a bit of it's not a problem.

It's not to be a bad thing. No, it's not true. At some point, all the world, it made. So, I said, I'll have it for me to sell, you know, at 8-year, you know, what's going to happen after? That's going to finish in tap onage and all, you know, and why, what I've finished by compend? Because I've only made, I'm made these hours of therapy there on,

and the medication, and I've passed by a couple of tempete for, for the, he said, what's the fucker in my

head, he was, he's like programmed at that age that, for coming to get to the charge after that, then,

then, you know, the kind of, you know, he said, he said, he said, he said, at my grandma

just, we had, and he, he had been to be coming me to call and he said, he said,

I'm like, I'm even more of attention of a woman, and he said, I think that a guy of six

can't put me it I don't know. You do you. You know, you know, you know, and after that it's been like,

excuse me, I, I'm sorry, I'm not going to but at this moment that, at 16 years, you're not

conscious or you're not still still what's going to before? Not before, I'm not, you know, because it's

when you it said it did it during it during you know, it's a one person

or, you it's, it's it's, it's not, it's so, it's occasional, You know, there's a event that five, six months later,

there's an other event that's a lot of, it's a bit... Chantage, the manipulation, he said, he says, what I'm in what I'm in front of, and it's more young,

and he's said, your grandmother, is all right with that, we're being by all of all, and all of all, and all right, and...

It's a... Naif, I imagine. But no, no, you're a man, it's a man, you're a dad, too, but then I'm...

Yeah, I'm... Yeah, I'm sorry, I said, he came to me to me say, he came to me to do, but I said, I said, I don't know, let's to do that, he's a fool a little, you know, okay.

And it's more tard, you know, you don't know, you're going to, you've got to be, you've got, and then, what I mean, the line, why I'm, why I'm, honestly, I've passed a good part of my life, enraged by the Christ, you know, and I never, and so, it's not,

for a lot, and that, it was a rage, invert the Church Catholic, and over the religion, and to be able to bring the churches, and to see, to be able to, to be a demon, you know, so, no, no, it's a moment of an end up, and the last time he made ask you to go, to love, and all that, and you know,

it's all the time, he'd give me money, me me, he'd give me, he'd, you know, de, de and, you know, he said, it's, you know, it's, you know, it's a matter, but when he said, oh, I'd say, I'd, I'd like that, I'd like that, to, find out with you, to talk to us, in your own, down, down to your , where, you'd, you're, you're, you're mad? You, you know, you?

You, you do, you, you do, you? , you do, you, you know, you do, you? he said, let's go. F'clock, and the last time I've seen, that I remember a little bit more, it was what? Then I said, and I said, I'm retien, in this moment

to pass it in the servo, my man. I said, I'm going to be able to never, I. I said, now I'm going to do all this time. And I said, it's never ever again. I said, you'll see,

what you're going to say, that you're going to say, that you're going to say, that you're that you're doing to do you get correct with that, with my grandmour, who had decided in

course of road, you were, they were all right with that. I said, do you. Fas what you have to do. And he may be, we've never, we know.

I can't ever, I think to try to be back after, because he, he called, I was, I was part of the

house, he called my mother, in the same for some of trying to , you know, so.

So, so, so, so, with all, and with all, with all, so,

I've been, like, my supap, and it's the sport. Go, go, go, go, the sport,

we're defonse, we're, I'm going to I'm sorry I'm just I'm and I'm and I'm

I'm trying to but I see I'm sure when I'm saying when I'm saying 16, 17, 18 10, 10, 20

I'm I'm asking but I'm not I'm not because you me said blonde you told you about your

blonde so you're being heterosexual in the life you're attired by the so at the

adolescence to so is that's to fokkate to make you a lot

to do to do you, the Ferry, but, you know, see, it's that, at the point it's...

It's a flashback often, and the way of the way of the confusion had to be,

I mean, when I was to be the more and then, what's what I'm to do,

what's what I'm that? I'm going to the flashback, it's what? It's a

fact, it's a fact, it's a fact, I'm, I'm, I'm just other,

and with my young, the little bit, it's all more than aggressive. And it's a feeling, it's a

resentment over the feminine because the little little little guy has done to get to put in the car,

my mother had been not abandoned, but it's that he had registered. You know, that the you're doing,

that's a place, it's a question, it's a woman, it's a family, it's a very soft, very gentie,

and I'm saying, thank me to me have to be connected to the sensibility, to the humanity,

but I have the love for my mother, and in the person, and over the feminine, and I don't know

why. So, with the time, it's quite with the conjoined. And then, there's a few that's in the fire of the action,

in the intimacy, and all of that, you know, you're in a flashback of an man that's made, it's being in front of face,

it's been very complicated. For me, amor, affection, emotion, contact, physical, it had to be

in all right, to be in my time in a place in a place in a while, what's what's the thing?

It's, you're more focused with your partner, You jump, and what's what's going to do? You jump and what's what you're a great, it's correct, it's correct.

We've got to, we're trying to until, you know, so, so, so, so, so, it's a few

I've only to demile it in course of route. You've been able to to be able to turn to, not, like you said,

he passed it to travel the, the head. Yeah. If I'm if you're the feeling that

you'd have been a feeling that had not been to regulate that of this way that, that's not

the way the way the way to do, but that's the time that's in it's coming,

I'm not, I'm not that's not that I'm not the way, but it's not, we're saying,

to be politically correct in explaining that's not the way but the way legal, the mannour,

is what you've done, in passing to those other, say, I'm,

I'm not too all alone. No. No. So is that is a thing you know?

Did you do a own own? Is it a process? Okay. With this man,

after this time after it and I've learned to understand to do that over this is that I'm a guy very curious,

I'm curious, I'm curious, I'm trying, I'm going to find out, I'm going to say, example,

we're a different by a subject, ah, yeah, it's a different, but probably that it's

might be maybe that it will be to be able to it, you know, so, so it's, so it's,

it's I've promised to mediske to do that, and what I've found out of after, and what I'm going to do you

know, and I'm going to do you know to do you're going to be to come back, but now I'm going to be

something, you're a guy who's mending down, and there's a group of indifference, now you're like 20? 40 years?

Like, really, we're not, we're not going to be talking to find to hear of some time,

but Chris, I hope to have to have to have to be I'm sorry, I'm Chris,

you, you're a guy who's a guy who's well, congratulations for that. I'm sorry to get to be able to work for that

sometimes, it's a lot of a little bit, it's always you know, you say, well, you know, it's me who

see, you know, it's me that, it's sure, I'm trying to so, so, so, so,

so you're adolescent, so you're in the sport, so, in other things in other things, in the sport,

and I'm playing, hockey, I've played, uh, of the Velro, the cyclist, the competition. You know, I'd say, I've been to say, I've been to say, my parents' in the rear of me,

it's a share, the cyclist, certainly, today, it's reduced. And he's supported, at this epoch, and that, and that's become, like, my chappo. I mean, I'm going to, my music. I know that we're not the other than the

old with, but I'd say, I'd passers, these hours and these hours in velour. I think there's, you're, there's people who are doing worse, huh? Well, I've made sure, but it's, it's,

it's, it's really permit to rest to ground-deck it's more than to don't know and then the alcohol. I'm afraid but you're

but I'm saying but I'm saying it's a I mean it's a job at a job it's a it's always I'm saved and I'm

saying today I'm for the few conferences that I don't and the little interviews move, you have

you have been to be in your body and you know and the endorphine that you know when I was I'd say when I

do you're that's an training also that I'm that made to me remit to me remit to me

It's the major antidepressure to the moment. Oh, absolutely, absolutely. I mean, I'm saying, the physical that I have,

the physical that I'm positive to the fact that I'm train, but at the base, I'm training, it's a little for it's in health,

but for me, push to gym, it's 10% of health physical, 90% of mental. Yeah, it's the

meyer antidepresser to the world. The proof is that I'm not if there's been someone who should be in it's been

me, but I'm you don't have done you've got I'm anxious but the sport I'm with you with you're in

100% it's the I'm doing the I'm going to the march of the course of the car in a car

and it's not it's not being an fool an cranking that you will be going to make a

time that's you'll change it's a clear, it can't you're in that's

in a fact you're at a time and at a moment I'm at some

I'm to happen to happen to be to be and the more and more of the car that that this man

had known. He had touched. So I got in plenty of face in the weights in the gym I've been a gym rat. I've been

quite a lot. I've been quite more than that also in the past even at the beginning of the problems of the health,

you know, the hormones, the pressure and all that. But I've been there than that. I've even made a stage

in culturist in 1996, but I been there done that. Natural, of a boat to the other I'm not

but I'm clas but I'm but I'm doing it but I'm wondering after after

why I'm why I'm down in front in front of the same explanation that's that's

to be to make a carapace it's it's a part of the little in the

part of you know it's you know, it's it's it's, it demand like a

bit a respect but in me, I'm so much I'm somehow

that I'm not no problem my car my physical probably for me, you know? Before that the camera

were on, you know, you've asked, you know, it's not always to be easy to receive, what the people

say, and I'm, it's, because I relate not, you know, and you know, you talk to what you've talked to do this

that, you know, where it's some of, sometimes that's the last you've been to say, you've been to say, you know,

to get the the bad man, you know, you know, I'm saying, you know, when you're, you know,

when you're not, you know, you know, You know, what you've What you've been to say, I'm going to I'm going to

I'm trying to I'm even a gag that's just that's that's the word carapace and you know

that's a carapace. I'm talking in my show of the show of we're just of,

we know, we're the little the little guy anxious of eight eight years,

he is in all that, and we're on the we're, we're, we,

you know, it's, it's, it's, it, it's, it's, psychologically and physically,

so we're pre-affronted more at the level physical, but at the level psychological, when we're we're looking, we have an impression that we're, that's almost a suit.

Absolutely, absolutely. It's so, but, but you're going to be at a place that, you know, I've never been in my head, it's to say, I'd want me

to get to my car that he has touched. Totally. That, it's something in which I relate not, but, you know, that I,

the mentality that, to say, I'm in a total transparency, and I'm open to over today to talk about about whatever, I'm doing the time, I'm doing the time as much as much,

it's been, it's been quite long time, that I'm able to be able to be in a mirror, yeah, you know,

it was like, no, no, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, I'd like, I'd like, it's, it's,

it's, you, it's, you're gonna, you, you know, with your mind, with, you, you know, And I said, and I was going to, and I was, I was there, I was, no, it's the right, it's the law who's the way it.

It's not good, what he had come up. So, even if you had all in the chamber of ban, it, it was always a servite. I'd want to be. So, I've had to have, because it's important. It's the sole bodied that we have. It's important, a little, to get, to be, to be it. So, I'm just, I'm just to, I'm just, I'm having all right, because I had not been able to pay them to buy them, but I'm doing it, but I'm doing it, you

I'm going to do, in a couple of gym, sometimes I've got, I'm braced, some of the phone, and there's been, it's doing good, you know, the world, you're doing, you're here,

you're so, yeah, but there's what other after, you know? So, I'm talking about, then, after that, I mean, I said, I continued to go to go to school,

it's not easy, it's like I said a, I'm going to to get to, uh, I've reached a diploma at CEP and in

art plastic. Okay? Yeah, I've had a coat artistic that I'm even today. And at the time, my parents, it was these academics. It had been, it's very far for us, the first of the first of the class, the diplom, and

all that. So I think that, in a way, you will, you know, you've, you've, you've, that's, you've that you, but I, I'm not trying to put in, I'm just, and I'm just a mouton-nought, you know, not, you know, not to fashion negative, but I've never fifted in the mule, I've fete in the mule, I've got to put more in the mule, and I'd just Not in New York, not not even,

capable of to register a bit of data. So I've reached a year to be my second

with the course for the year. And after that, then there have to be to choose what you

want to do later. And then I think to to force army. Okay. I had

a professor at the school, I think, he's in moral or who was,

how is what they're what they're in, the, the formation professional professional. Yeah,

an all a line, a bit, an oriente oriente, yeah. Arrienter. What's what I was in?

I had talked, and he had a little, and at this time, that's a time, it's a little bit of, the time, the hair, spiky, noir, gothic, a bit of the patente, I was, I'm rebelle, and he said, I think it's going to have a bit of misery with the authority, but at all the line, it's that I'd search.

I'd search a structure, I'd search an authority, and I'd be, and I'd and I'd just, I'd like something that'd be in a force-armie, to make part of a family like that. I mean, you're in a family, but it's like I said to my mother

last night, she said, I want to know that I'm going to say, my grand, that I'm always liked, I said, you know, I said, ma'amac, that's not, you know, the problem, it was it had been me, I'm codedeped by the same

when it's happened that, you know, I said, I said, at some point out of my place, I said, you're going to be able to be able to by this preight, and then, after that,

what's what I think, of an adult, of a woman, of a mother, you know, and I said, I know that it has made a lot, it had made a lot,

but I said, so, a bit with that today, it's all right. But, you know, we're so, we're telling us by the genus,

you know, I think, one of my invite, Claude Forge, it's a droop, because I've talked to him

with someone, yesterday or before the year, and, you know, he's going to see his first therapy for the consumption,

he has been abused by the director, it's after 40 before he had been to a other therapy,

you think he's going to do you during the four years, you're in the prison, and that it

could be to be because, because, he, for him, a therapy, it's synonym

to, you know, you do, it's it's been, it's a common because my mother's, it's not that we're doing

that's not, it's not our child, it's normal, you know, when you know, when you're doing adult,

you say, well, it's not in all the time, and my mother, she said,

she'd have been it could be it, but it would be it, it'd be to it,

you know, it's not, I think, I think, I think, if your mother had been,

she'd I've never, we've never. You know, we're going to be in 80. The religion is still a little more present than today. So, no, no, we've had been a lot, in large, on, I've had been. I've had been there. I've had been to do, man, I said, I don't want to do.

I say, at a couple of people, you have to have. And I said, I know, I'm. And, just, we're talking about, we're talking about bough, it's one of the psychedelic, with Bufo, who made to reconnected with all, that, that made really good.

You know, no, I know, I know, I know. In the medicines ancestral, you're the adem. ancestral, because I reconnected with the love to my mother, and it's just I'm doing, I'm just like, I'm

and I'm doing, but I'm saying, when you're when you're doing, it's just when you're doing your own, your mind,

he's too much, you know, he's going to get these links, and he's made up here, yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah, so I, , I'm interested to the kids at the school, and in the school, there was

there were the school, there were to be little blonde, and all this, and all over, it's, it's never

It's never been simple. It's never been simple. It's always been a bit chaotic, there's not an estime personal, always having fear to me far to make it wronged. So, well, it's me who's me who I let's wrong with me. I mean, I'm not black like a neage. And then, and then, and then, I'm trying to do you. I'm in front of those

end upholizing. I mean, there's bodybuilder after, and I mean, I'd say, I'm not a genetic for that. You've always just to be a lot. Feltupef had a pack of job after, after to go and after to go plastic, I've even, I've made a session at the University of in cinema, theater, I had five courses, I'd have passed one,

a 60, I said, it's a beau, finish for me, the college. I said, I'm in-queathed. I said, Papa, Mama, I'm, there I'm not able. I said, I'll just, what you're going to do. I'm arranging. I'm going to arrange. I'm going to work. The driverer, the stations, service, in a gym or,

or, or some, or some of the menage, or some of the small, you know, and, and, and, of the bar, obviously, as, like, as partier. And I'd say, I'd say that, that I'd like, the force of the most I'd like, and we'd say that's a little that I'm a little bit of that I

find that I'm doing with the project that I've brought to today and the job work, it's a lot of South of Quebec, and animator in a Mason Jones, I really really loved that. The connection with, to be there, to be present,

to be, to be, to be, to be, to, to, and without judgment. And, without, talking, or even even, even again, at this time, conscious of what it was

being in your life, you're able to relate with these young, that, that's, you're, so, they're, they're some of the young blessed, it's just to be conscious,

necessarily, of what you've been to be used at this time at the time and I think they're also. Probably.

You know, I don't know. I mean, I'm not really, you know, I go in a center of the youngest and, you know,

these things like so, they, they can't they can't me talk, and I'm more and I'm more more than just

the more than just the words. It's so. It's like, you know, it's like, you know, I,

you, I know my gym, I know not all the world, but my coach, I know all the world, you know, and I'm saying, like, this guy, that's sure,

it's an entanant in life, you know, I'm not, you know, you're not, you know, there's no, there's a, you know, there's a,

there's a, you know, when someone, a parkour, no, whatever he lists, this parkour, we,

we, we're able, we're able to, to be able to say, to be able to be, so, so, I'm, I'm sure,

so, I'm gonna be a, a good place in my heart with the young who who have made to make a

bit with us and then it's a community of the community and after that it's been after that's

armed. At 25 I'm at the time, I'm at least, we've got on the subject on a subject

we've got very little about, on the case I relate to much, and I think a subject

that's very, in this moment on the on the on the on the on the

on how you, how you, made of the front a bit if I

search the word when something is grave but we're banalise thank you I'm trying to

I'm being banalized you know I've done I've done to get a period until until

that it's impact on my health after we're after I'm after

I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm that the young

that you listen on on on TikTok it's so, you know, it's a lot of, you know, the guy that's

called the Trent Twins and I'm, I'm saying, I'm doing it, but I'm just I'm doing, and I think, like I said, banalized,

what's what I'm impacted on your life? Is I, if I can't talk about and we can't be operated

at cause of the price of steroids, you know, and, yeah, effectively, but, but you know,

but you're, but you're, you say, you know, we're doing, we're going to Porgy, and we'll do that, and then we're going to do, and then we're going to

maximum, and it's what, what in your life? Of the fashion positive, you know, is that you make the same effort, if you want, the entrainment, you recover more rapidly. Yeah, we know, we know,

the side, I don't know, positive, of steroids, because, you know, I mean, the world doesn't not for anything, you know, I'd say, yes, it's a problem, but to bring some of the pud, for to reveigh, also, it's not, it's not the

best of the option you know, I focused too on the outcome on the result final. I'd putt up attention to

processus. At your to be able to get to do it's important to do you know, it's not just to say I'm

the most the most the best of and the pre-workout and all these things

I'm I'm subceded with the resulta because I think for me I wanted I want to

me really me alone me to be able of a car that was to be able I've had to have to have

to have a world, you know, and the impact negative that the price the sterile had had been the problem

of pressure, I've had been in the problem of aggressivity, I mean, you know, after that you

when you're in the time it's a ta'clock. Oh, that's not that's not that's not

for you listen to I'm doing a movement of on on bottom with my

but I make not a bit to you let's and for me, I was

all of that, but it's a price to pay that it was correct. So I'd say, I'd say, I'd

say, I'd buy it, at a pretty, t'clock, t'clock, any, whatever it's all right, so I'd even dis-equilibre hormonalement, terrible, ginacomasty also, and it's when you debarck, normally, when you finish a sick, you're a protocol, you know, for

to give you the time to your system, to stop quite, but we'd have to do you know the day or the night. So, yeah, well, I'd just have, I, I'd say, a, I'd say, a month, to squatty, five and a few livres. The month After, I had the misery to live in a play, the force it had more malpard, you know,

psychologically. Psychologically in depression. Fucked up. That's that. And after that, the chican at all over all over to do that with the blonde, and, you're... You're not able to be able to

get to have been. Because, she's... She'll have been in the middle and, I'm, it's finished. You've got to put control on what's going to be so, you know? And then, the force starts drop.

I mean, I've been can't even have been a certain force natural but the

advice that I would say, I'm doing that I'm doing, I think it's bad at but it's not a risk

I'm not I'm afraid to say that is super dangerous, but if you you're not to do it

and I'm not the reality, it's your reality, the mine, it's the

I'm to explain why I'm I'm to do do it to do you do,

I'm, it's the I'm saying that I say I say to person to get to enter there's a because of one

it's a idea of a addiction what's what's the that's a lot and then I'm talking about

and I'm talking you're like you you're a guy who has made a someone who someone who's

someone who look we're not we're not we're not we're not we're not we're not

it's not something for for the impact you know I I mean, I've seen a chirology, we've opened

the car, for me, I just had a mastectomy, I'm a chis, or whatever, you know, because I was

getting rid of these titan of the end of , you know, because, you know, you've done, and,

and, and, yeah, I've done in a time, but I'm not in that's in

that time, but each car react in different, you know, they're not they're not they've done

they've done they've done they're doing, you're a guy who aromatize easily to me. So, you,

, it's so, so it's just, I know we're just, I know that's a thing that's important, you know,

that's a thing something banalized, and it's, you know, it's a drug, it's, it's, they're,

it's, it's, some of, you, see, it, it's, it,

it, it, it's, it, it's, it's not, but it's change, enormously,

on the level, psychological, yes, but it's, it's an enormous impact, and it's

Not physically, not like the heroine, because you're a reason to do, but it's something that's a lot addictive to do you know, mental, cerebral. You know, like

the activant, an activant is not a medicament that's going to be addictive physically, but it's a medicament that's a

psychologicalically, I have been for, and that it's just, hey, if I don't know if I'm trying, I'm doing,

I'm doing, so, so, so, car, you know, to have a big shape and he ran to 60, you know, at 60,

you're going to get to be able to get to be in the past, and you'll have been to have been to be the best of the world, you'll have

put this chest that. You'll have, like, old Kogan, who had, there's a million,

but a guy like Sylvester Stallone, yeah, at his own age, he's in the millions

that you know, and the people, and you look, you look, there, yeah, there's a

shape for a guy of 70, but you don't know, Chess who had at 30 I don't know. It's not, you know,

so I'm, so I want to be that you know, you know, I'm invent these words, we can't

be able to a long time. You can't. Well, the advice that I'm not with you, and it's,

it's not because you're the chum in the thing, you're obliged to do you mean, I'm in a

little gym, it's pretty pretty normal, so if you so if you do it, so if you're like,

if you know, inform to with someone who knows that, a good coach, but my view, person,

Mage like the most, at least, at the beginning, you know, you know, you want to start, you know, you're going to start, you know, hey, Mange like the world, move a little. Dever, you'll watch at how point it will change your physique. Yeah, and why do you do you do not,

if you're not going to be able to, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I don't, you know, I'm sorry, I'm saying, yeah, when I was, when I was, you know, when I was, you know, when I was, you know, I'd like four march, I see, I want to

have to be in mind. You're not a quarter of an athlete, but you're zero-zero-zero in form. It's the sport, one of the sports, one of the world, but it's one of the sport the most most

more than the sport. It's a big of, so we're going to get in, we're going to get in a bit there on, because, you know, I thought it's something important, and I think that's something that I,

I had already time to talk about here. Twenty-five-year in force. Yeah. You're trying, you know, you You know, you know, you've got to have your place rapidly.

All right. Because, you've got to have been to manage, you're still in your life. No. It's correct. It's a couple of years that's been in your life, but you've not made it the manage. You don't know what it's been. You know, you've got to have been it in, but I'm just going to have a place, you know, and it's in a...

It's in my... It's in my... It's in my... And the bottle, you know, he starts to crack it, but he's... But, you know, you're put it in the front. The mid in the front. The jander, it's...

It's in per-dard my job, justly, with the adobe, in the communeoteur, I made, like, come in a moment of an hour, I said, you know, you know, it's what? It's there. It's been, like, a cut to point in the face, the Force of Armée. Perfect, the Force of Armée. So, I'm starting my demarche. I know anything to the Army. Rewing in part, there's a lot of my family inmediate, even in my grand family, who had been in the Force Army. So I'm going to go, and I go to St. August, St. And I'm going to be, I said, I'm going to be enrol. Okay, okay, you have you've been informed? What do you know,

what you know, the forces of me? Nothing but in touch. He bought me in the war. What I'd what I'd I'd like to be

a popper at the time for the forces army. And he said, he said, in this moment, the metis is a firm.

He'd say, I think it's more a contract at the level, to the and he said, you'd like, do you,

he'd say, you know, you know, you know, he'd say, we're doing in the infantries,

it's interesting, yeah, yeah, but I'm to do you, I'd like, the appell was hard.

Between the time I was in-roled and the time that I've put in my job with the young,

I think I think I'm a year and a year and a year that's poor and I did, I'm

making, I'm doing on the cashier on, my card of credit to get a house, it

would be in it's a $267 dollars per month. It was another time.

It's a other time and I had a another time to have to I'm two, three,

three, my job, there for force of army. When I was into the force, without there's a course, I

had a call, I had a minute, I didn't, me, I'd never, I'd try to,

I'd try to make that the force of the army, and it's a first day. Is it

you, you think, you know, we're saying sometimes, the young who are going to

come down in the criminality over, let's, get to a gang of and stuff

like that, you, you, we search a family, we're a little, something like that, you know,

it's all that, you think, you're going to, without the without the without, without, it's, you know,

we realize that with a recule, you know, because at the base, the young that are, like, I'm going to

get a family, no, you do you just, you'll be like like the grand, you know, you've been to do, you're

going to, you're still that you're sometimes you're, you're, you're, it's,

it's, it's, in your unconscious. Yeah, it's a whole. I mean,

with the identity that I had, the idea that I had used to be in a view of the

city of I'm not to do you and I'm pretty much, yeah, I'm just going to

the country, not the group criminalized. It was something that's a turnoyed

in the head? Yeah, I'm tornoyed in the time, I'd be pretty,

hey, you'd do you do, and I existe and then, and I got to

a colus, you know, the... Camcel adrenaline, I said, listen, I'm I'm wondering if there's a guy

that I know that's quite in fact of, he's not quite there's not, so he's not gonna not get in the gym, of this milieu, no more,

so it's, you know, that's the world that's that you guys, that's not, it's not been hard, but there's it's been forced and then,

and then it's for that I said today, the forces army me have saved. You know, I would say, yes, the groups

criminalized, it would be a another family, but the forces armes are to come to my new gang. There are the gang of the

gang has been the army, my gang, it's we're talking about if we're talking about the group criminalized

the most known at the world especially in Quebec, and the other, the Ayes and Jals, it's been at the base

it were the guys who were coming of the army, they're made together, they've created a bit the fraternity that

they had, they've had been after the war, so it's like that it's like, if I'm

if I'm trombe not, even it's it's a, it's an, it's an unity, of the army, the El's in the

day, so it's so. So, so, so, so, and then

you've understood, you know, it's a place? Yeah, it was like, when I

had to not, it was what I had been to learn also, and at

and at the end of that, wow, I'm like, wow, I'm that, it was a

structure, a rigidity that me made, even it made, it was a more

And I would say, well, we've started the co-de-recru at St. Jean. I think that's the day, a year, I had 25 years. I was the second plus year. And, well,

it's so. I had worked with work with a apartment and all that, and there were and there were and it's correct also, you know,

and after a week he'd be parted, I'd say, oh, man, I, I think, I think, I'm there's a deal and I say,

I think I'm I'm going to end to come to come back, you know, you know, he said, when you he says,

when you think, The relative, a little to do, we're doing what to do, we're doing, we're doing, you know, you know,

I'm doing, I'm doing, I'm doing that's, the same way to see that, you know, you know, and you're doing a

cut, and it's part of, you know, but it's correct. Well, Matt, you, I think, a young of 18-year,

let's, let's see, that's a life, you know, that's the first time that he views something of,

to, drastic, of rough, you're, you're there, and you're there, and do drastic,

and do rough, you know, you've been to have v. You've been to have every hour after and had to have had had been to have a mal on muscle and he's and had been suffoled

and fatigued. Contraryment, it's fecal for you. Yeah, I mean, I respect everyone with his parkour also. No, no, no,

but, in you know, for you, it's probably for sure. I thought not that's too that. It's a good

to gym, so, you know, the gym, because, you know, we've talked to we've talked to we've talked to the steroid,

but, you know, what the people perhaps know, know, no-know-to-know-to-that-injected these steroids, if you do

nothing, it's not, it's not, I mean, you know, I'm saying, you know, it's not, you know, it's not,

it's a lot of work, absolutely, so, so, you, it's an , it's, there's a, it's a number of

the nutrition, so, so, so, if you , if you're talking, if you've done, you've done, especially,

if you've done, certainly, you've done, it's enormously the discipline, and the person against who you're,

it's like a combat to box you have to box someone you box with you know there's there's a guy on stage

but at the first person against who you to be on your fight, you're back on your fatig you're talking to

you're on your your own party in competition so so the discipline you look yeah

uh live these affairs rough there's there's so for you I'm

so for you I'm for you I'm I'm trying you're you're a you're a

part of you're a sportive I mean, I would say, when I'm in-trained, and it's still so at a gym, I like to have to have a lot. You can certainly... Oh, yeah, well, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the co-the, I think it's a millioner today, because, you know, we're talking to a 30thene of about, to that, you know, today, I think that's not the same, but, you know, oh, you're an nasty vidange, you know,

it'd be more so at the time to be able to be glad, to be, you know, like, you know, like, you know, like, you know, in the film, to be, you know,

it had already been a lot more rough. Oh, no, no, that's excellent. I don't know. I've never received so rough than that's a whole of course.

I never received a coup of that way, I've said a couple of times, hey, my, my estate not bad at the morning, and it's correct,

and we had in the time when we had made some gaffed when we've fucked up, and it's, it's a lot, you know,

it's a lot, and I'm, I'm just, I mean, that you're trying, I'd get to, really, I'm, I'm trying to, I'm,

I'm, I'm, you know, it's, young, I mean, it's a lot time, I mean, I was always told, you know, I said, hey,

in the period of the case I went to get in the army, we said, you know, I'm doing that, you know what I'm going to be able to and I'm trying to to do you, but I'm

going to get a real idea that, you say, I mean, I said, I'm saying something, I'm going to move to a monsieur who will me say something, it's sure

that you know, you're trying to to try to in the face and I'm going to be like. It's been for for you, but it's clear,

today, today, I'm, today, I know that it would have not been for me, you know, but, you know, you have really tried your place? Is it in this moment, like, the alcohol has already

in a while in your life with your life? Is it something that's something that would come? You know, I'd be... Prone it to be a bit of time with some friends. But regular, that, it was not... But, you know, it's not really that's so that that's a lot, you know, and a few, you know, and a while, you know, and then-a-you-per-a-oh,

yeah, yeah, we're not a competition of velour, whatever, that's a pint of summer. We're, we'll be able to find the alcohol and we've done and we're doing, you know, it's not a becky at this moment. No, it's not a becky, never that. The becky, he's been a little

little bit more later when I think, what's the one of the thing that's my father was born,

my wife, it's a turn of a bit different different a little bit. But your journey in the army,

it's almost to, you get to rent, well, I imagine, I'm not, I mean, not,

I remember, I'm not, it seemed, at the time, it was something like, two months to say,

I'm saying, there, there a thing, a TV, there, a two-year-old, I think it was that, I think it was a lot, and he'd

saw, there's a boy, there's a lot, you know, there's a lot, you know, we're gonna, we're 15, you know, we're 15, you know, because it's a pure job at because you know,

because you're kind of made solid, I think, for far, you know, it's a question to test your world, you want, you want to know who, he's entrainable,

he's not trainable, he's not trainable. So, so, so, so, it's, it's, it's past well, it's all, it's been

with the recrue, and then we're We were in the quarter to do a co of infantry, who, it was probably four months at the time, something like... But you're all right. You've been...

Yeah, a employee of the Army Canadian. The Army Canadian, I've been a functioner for the defense. Is it a specialise, you're in a base, or you're a soldier? How do you call that? Fantassin.

Fantassin. It's so. Fantasin for the Royal 22nd Regiment. I'm very fared to all. Lowskama Balloon has come a little petted. I would have wanted to go, because you had three battalion to Royal Vendezer Regiment, and each had, like,

plus a little bit of its responsibilities. And at the time, as the commandos-a-airoparted, the first commando, the second-comando had been dismantled, it was the company A of 3rd Battalion who had been the company aeropartair, Airborne, finally. And I'm, it's there I, I'd like to go.

Because the 2nd Battalion, they were like more in charge, the Guard in Ruge, in Quebec, the grand casas-de-poil with the veston-ruth. it would be more that. For me,

I'd didn't get in the forces of for that. So, it's a part of the

responsibility that we have that's not that I'm that I'm that's a that I'm that's a

whole of the course of the I've had the case of the course that's a time. Wait a

wait. Ah, that's that's that's been too, that's it's,

but I think I repents to do you I'm having you've got you've got that's not the

force of It's not going to be in a bit photo to you and in a bi-dreight. It's sharp. It's sharp. Like, my competition, I have a beautiful in my bureau on the scene, it's made.

Chris, I'd return never there. No, you're not there. But it's been, you know, you're quite a, you're trying to have to do you know, to the way, it's in the force of army and the Royal 22nd Regiment,

and it's still, and at all at the time, it's, it's a matter of, you know, all the thing, I'm still what, I'm still today, I'm still, I'm still all what is protocolaire, and the ceremonies, and all that,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's a lot of, so it's a part of course, it's a lot of,

in fact, it's a lot of, every year, that's a whole, that's, so, so, so,

so, so it's, so, so, it's, a certain reputation, so, so, so, so,

I've been, two, et, I, I can't say that I, I've been, being, all the time,

and it's, then, and, why I'm, why I'm, to find, finally, with the Force Special, Ottawa, it's like one of the

summer, there's a caporale who's been in me to see a face-a-moe, the cuisine of the Citadel of Quebec, and we practiced

just the show that we were in trying to get the show for the garage and all, so we had practiced a drill,

and then he came to come to see, hey, Gimm, he'd say, why you'd why you'd

say, why, I've got no idea of what he'd of what he said, the GTIF, GTF,

pardon, 2, it's the commando of the army, Astor, if you want, the force special. He said, before, you know, before, T'U.O. And then, after that, it's the time, it's the GTF who's occupied to say, ah, yeah, he said, well, he said, you, you know, he said, you're a guy minded, you're a guy disciplined, you're trying, and, you know, and I said, oh, yeah, it's all right, it's a lot, in fact, I'm doing.

It's all right, so, I'm doing, so, I'm going to, my research, you're a bit on FOUI, 2, there's not quite more secure. So I've reached to point in a couple of of soldiers, or the caporo more used to get a little in the

agrenage for to be able to do the other to do the force special. And finally, well, as a, I've reached

to be accepted to go to me to try the first week, the week, that we can be compared, I think,

I think, I can't be quite a little comparable as the Force Special American do, We have the notes. And that's a

week of selection that you do you're in the two first time you have made, the one who's the

people who are it's a bit of a bit of that's a way? Yeah, we go going to be in the extreme.

It's the extreme. I mean, I don't know, I think that the force of necessarily of what are more difficult

offer, the more challenging maybe search and rescue Sartek, and it's trying to try to find out

so, so I'm trying to there, there's what there's what you I mean, I feel like in a time where I'm going to I'm going to get

I'm in trying to get I'm in trying to I'm just like push constantly to get back to and I'm trying to and I'm trying to where I'm just where I'm

just where I'm going I don't know I'm just where who's going to I'm going to do you know, I'm I'm an impression that's the

little guy who 's going to be a man you're overpruciance or you want to do something that's what you're what you're trying

with the gym you've always who've also wanted to become gross, strong, powerful, quick, quick,

quick, quick, quick, dangerous, because it's it's been in a, you're in

an arm, that, so, so, so, I'm, I'm a two-and-mere

, you know, well, it's, it's, but, you know, with all, the people,

that's, I'm gonna, you know, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,

I'm not, I'm, I'm, I'm, I think, I'm, I'm, I'm,

who's who's playing in this moment at the television. Because, now you say GTF, we're often the name GTF size in the arms. I don't know if you've got to look at it. I've heard you. I don't know. You're going to inspire a little bit of this of JTF, but they can't let me get up.

You're not going to ask you. My question, because it's like, at how old is that it has no longer sense, you know? I could not say. I've never seen what. I'd ask you to put it back question, because we're not saying,

but, you know, it's something, when we're going to, the Liga, it's an intra-Can Canadian, with the Russians, but it's it's a fiction, you know, but I'm curious to have the language who, what I'm saying, what I'm made, they're making these researchers

on the fact of, they've been, I'm trying to, I suppose, that's quite, I'm not, I'm not, I'm curious, but you're not, you're not, you're not, I'm not sure, so, so, so, you're trying, so, you're accepting, I imagine, it's, it's a, it's a couple of,

because, 2001, I, I'm, my first selection, as a soldier. And there I'm with Caporo, Caporo to Chief, I'm really nervous

and I'm like, you know, it's like, it's a matter, I'm going to make a pressure, it's a ridiculous. And it's so,

so the week of the selection you're going to you're trying to do you because of all they want to know who's

on the other before to invests on a soldier for them for being for a force special, it's not it's not

great, it's it's not the investment of time but monetary also. At the time, we've heard heard of

we've asked some of the few, and there's not a lot of other than in 2000, 2002, we were talking about

a quarter of million to form a operator of the force special. It's a part of the salary.

It's a post-COVID that's probably that's been to continue to continue to get, you know, but it's

so, so I'm I'm back for my first week of selection, and I'm termine, I'm finished,

I'm finished, I'm sure that's possible, I've been to come to to meet to meet a of the

and if for me it would be not that I'm on going to be in mission in Bosnney with the

battleion. Okay. I was interested to my going to be in Bosne and I'm in Bosne

there's a lot of it's been there's a okay, it's not the fact to go to get to a lot of

Boseney. Yeah, it was been a GTIF that I wanted that's so that's a

priority. That's rarely rarely when you're rarely when you're not quite because even

the even the even the even the it's because he There will have a lot of training of simulation

all the time also to keep to get up to date. Oh, it's true. Yeah, it's true. It's so. So, so that you're in mission

or not in mission, it's all the time, it's all the time something. And it's what it's a certain level of performance because you're, I mean,

I compare that a little bit to a, I guess, the club, the Canadian, and their gross team. The pro.

The, so I mean, it's that, and I think, and I dengue not to the army conventional, we're not

our need the 22, the francophone, even all the people who are going to be in Afghanistan, they're made

made up to get a lot of their own in a lot of operation. So, the guys, I'm just, I'm going to

get a job as much, it's not more than I just that I'm doing that and I'm going to say,

100% so. So, you're still to get in Bosnia? I'm I'm in

Bosnne, so the year, the year, the year in the year, it's a

a beautiful country. I've adored the experience. It's just that I'd have to be a little more active. I mean, you know, I'd have to be a rocket on the and then, and I'd have to be all the time more. And then, it was all the big defyce, for me, it was so. At the month of 2002, my father had died, and there was no, there was a great. There's a bit of and then. And you're not there. No, I'm not here. And I'm not viewed up until. And at the point, it was a little bit of my parents. I knew that my father had had a few different, you know, and it's a bit of rough, you know,

and it's a bit of rough, you know, and it's always, you know, it's other, you know, so. So, so, so I'm a night, I'm at our Mesa, at our Boston, pardon, and it's the Caparral Andevoire who came to buy, and he said, there's a person who would say, we'd have the door to two beer, per soar, so on the time, so, so, so, I'm so, so, so, so, so, I'm trying to, so, I'm trying,

to, and I'm trying, and, you're in, to have been, to talk, and, you're, I'm, at 8-hour, 9-hour, the night, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, can't see, I'm to see, I'm going to see, I'm going, and I'm I finish that, I go to go. And it's a little, it's to be rest.

He me and he's like, all right. All right. I don't, I'm doing my beer, and I'm going to go to work

to get to work, and I'm trying to watch the TV, and I see the padry who is sitting there. So, I'm like, the padrae

a priest, yeah, the Padre, the homonier military, so, so, so I'm,

maybe not someone who you have to have been in the of them, there's, there's, some people,

it's, it's It's not... It's not right. I see more the captain, the military avant's,

he's not he's abbey in... He's abbey in military, so, so... I look at and I'm... He said,

Mr. Guimot, it's an anglophone. And then, I'm like... The reflex that I'm came to... What's...

I'm... ...that I'm I'm not... ...that I'm I'm not... I'm... I'm... I'm...

I'm... I'm... I'm... I... ...I... ... ...I... We'll go out, and he said, we're going to talk a little. We're going to say, okay.

I feel the pop, in total, I said, what's it that what's what? What's it going to be? So, we're going to sit on a bar, and he says, it's not easy to say. And then, then, I've got a flash. And I said, oh, no. I said, I don't. I said, I said, I'm going to. He said, yeah, he's been a crisis of heart, and he said, he's not, he has not

passed out of the travel. I said, what? It's, you know, I'm not. Because you're, you're trying to person, that's, it's not. It's not. What's what you said, I'm not in the good film, you know, so I'm like, okay, so

now I've got, okay, so, like, I've got, all the soul, me patting in front of face, and I'm saying, yeah, I'm, then I'm, my commandant of section

at the time, Mingo, good, man, a good chame at me now, and, he said, hey, gay, me, he'd say,

that's, you feel like, that's, he's correct, he, you know, when you're, it's not a, yeah, well,

I, I, yeah, I, I said, I'm correct, I, I said, he'd just, he came to me to say that my father is more, I said, I point that to do that, hey, he made remorse the growle, and all the and all the time, and I found the seraph because I was

too, I was very long, you know, and it was difficult to to talk to the world, but in the same time, I was a good place because my gang was there. I've felt as support the Brotherhood, you know, and then, and I found out, it really, it's not easy, it, it's not easy, that. What you were to go to search at the base, perhaps, without the know,

you know, you know, you're doing, it's a there's a thing, and then the guy, they're in the

little chandel, that was brought to my door to a time, there, there's two by that, and I was like, wow,

it's so, well nice. You know, the, the, the chaleure that, it's a

thing, it's a moment that, and it's, it's, it's been very rough and,

but at the , you know, is that, you've been a permission to return to the ,

so, so it's, it's, They've not to work during this time that, he's going to to do you know,

you're going to do you know, you're in a little bit of a way, so I'm saying, oh, boys, I said, when you're doing you're able to

to be able to something, and then I had some the pellul to do that, so it's a day of anastasy that I was trying

to do you know, because I'd be able to, I'd beck, I'd beck, I'm going to me to try, a bill of time?

You'd be able to, do you, did you, do you, to talk to them? I've talked, the morning, I mean, I've heard of my frere, and in the case, I've talked to to my mother also, and I said,

I said, did, tell me that's not true, that's, that's a mover-a-reveve? There's a guy who, there's a guy who are you? No, it's been that that's been to arrive, and, so. So, it's been a couple of years, and, finally, I'm, that's, I'm returning to the country for,

for the ceremonies, and it's super well passed, and I'm going to, and I'm going to, finish the mission in Bosnene. And, and then, and then, I had already to have to start the

day to try to to get on the machine, because you're doing to try to have to be after one of the thing, you know,

it's going to be you know, you know, you know, you're exactly, but when I had received my memo, pardon,

on the battalion, it said, the note of service that said, at this time, the soldier, Guimon, we have not

been selected to go to the course, but we're not encouraged strongly to represent the year of the

year, I'm, I'm just what I'm the word, the part the word, the word,

let's go, we're parted. So I was in the Minesette that we're finished the mission in Bosnney. I've made my

tests physical there to prove to prove to I'm still in form. I've had had a

good support because Patrick Cote who, an ancient UFC who had made an animator at the

TV. Oh, yeah, yeah, we're in the same in the same company.

Okay. And he was there on the same in the same in the tests physical for

Morris, hey, he's to do you have to do with me, and me motivate, like, hey, the gross, and push, push, push, and that, it's rest, there. The Brotherhood?

Exactly, the Brotherhood, again one way, he did not oblige to do that, to go ahead and be able to be able to do with me, and he was like, wow, the Brotherhood, the rest, it all the good, and then,

so, I'd rather than, I'd say, yeah, the machine was part, we'd be on the country, we'd, we'd, we'd finish the mission, pardon, and, and, um, gross, gross,

decision, difficult, the problem is one of the more difficult that I've had to learn to my life. I'd train in a course. I had a room at Citadel before to part of mission in Bosnia, and I said, mask, you'd like, that'd ever be remanage in the family, I'd go to bring a room, and I said, like, we'll be able to support a little bit in the deign.

My mother had turned to soul, my brother at Montreal. So, I've had made it so, I'd have been entraned. That's the night, it's a piece of cyclable on the board of the flood of St. Laurent, in the event of Quebec. You could not have a better place to go ahead. And I'd be able to get, and I'm And I'm going to go where? I'm going to go, but I said, I go for what?

What I said, what I said, what I'm doing? I abandon the demarch for this year, or I rest in the house, we'll have done with a day, my mother and me, and we, and we're supporting, and I said, I've asked me, and I said, and say, let me a sign, invite me a response, something, like, something that's what I've been. The sole response that made me have been,

is finished what you come out. When you said, I came to ask, a question? To my father, perhaps. Okay. To do you're not... I'm not... I'm just...

I'm spiritual. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not... It's not. It's not... In the universe... Yeah.

Don't me a response because there, I'm in there. I'm going to go to go ahead with that. You're going to... Yeah. I continue to

to be in trying to me and to make pay because you have to you have to be at there. I'm entrained to two years

to the course of the weights, of the escalate, the natation, of the box. So, you're all right. Okay,

I continue to do that. The response that's coming is, you're finished what you know, if it's due to work,

it's not not going to work if it's not not a year, you'd rather than that's not that's not. So, you know,

that's what I'm coming up as the answer, so I've started to go ahead, I've been continued my entrain of mar,

and the then the day, then, the day, to go, to go, to go, my second selection.

And then, and then, and then, I think, it was the last year, that's in 2002,

it's at in the month of November. And then, you know, I've made the week of the selection also. I've finished more magane this time.

I was a little bit more pleasant. I'm a little bit a little bit of what's in front of also, you know, especially, more more nervous.

At the time, it was like, there's like something that that's, that's, that's, you know, a more than,

a more, in the ignorance, too, you've already did you know, to see, a bit to see, a bit of what,

you know, at the time, at least, you know, at a per , you know, I was going to say, what, the volley, you know, who it's that came, you know, and I'd say, and I'd say,

don't what you'll have done, and then and it would have, you know, before, I'd have to control the outcome of all, no, no, no, it's just to work, you know, but it's limited what you control, and all that, you know, a bit, you said that with the death, you know, a little lessor-a-all-a-lossed

a-price that's... A little bit of... The life is fragile, so, so, you're also bad to say, to the opportunities that the life that's easy. That's it. So, that's it, so I've had,

this week of this time that's a little cut on the car, on the mental and I'm finished and I'm going to this year,

I'm going to do with the call that the time. Today, I think it's more than a year, and we're going to come

to get a Sauter with the GTF January 2003, excuse. I'm going to have been a lot of things to talk.

You're doing a guy GTF? Yes, sir. Well, June. July or this year? The second,

the second, the second, the second, I finished. I finished, It's been long, it's been rough. We've got started, I think, it's a ten of 30th on the course

for about between 120 candidates that's saved in each annes in these years. And it's a tour of a success there's a lot of

there's been a lot there's not person who has been to be a total to passage of maybe 20% because at a man also,

it's that it's a very, very, you know, you can't be a, you know, I mean, you can't,

you know, it's not, you know, it's so, you know, it's not, it's not, It's not even It's not even It's not

It's not It's not It's not Like in the police The SWAT You know, I'm talking to

I'm talking to I'm a I'm a It's ironic But yeah I'm just I'm not It's always

It's not always It's a case But today I'm a new He's had Yeah, He's got He's at

So, he's He's just He said, And I'm And I'm And I'm It's so, It's so, it's

It's so, it's It's so, it's It's so, it's It's a It's actually It's actually who can't pass,

I mean, it's a elite, and it's like in a lot of because you're in being not a boxer, you know,

you have to have to get a genetic, you know, to be able to that's the same thing. Yeah. So, with

all that, it's a new step that comes in your life, it's a part of a great fearty also, you

go to search. Very great fearty. The journey that we'd make, our badge assoulter,

it was tagged on the chess, I'd like, I'd say, thank you, then, And I was a guy emotional. I had the eyes

that were in the water and I was like, my God, we're doing, we're doing, finally, you know, I was going to,

it's going to do, it's not much for me, that I mean, I just also, a little bit that I've not said, I've had been

back to the force, and I readed not intelligently at all, it's all the time to find, the adrenaline,

the deline, the delis of fut, the etiquette, it's, it's a messy my life, you know, I'm going,

where with that? And, and in the Like I was in a new time I said, I was I found a family, and then graduating, finally, I was like, wow, I had an impression that I had piqued my mountaine to me.

And then, you know, that's the view there. When is your past you're rattrape? Ah, the pastor retrap? Because I understand that the death of your father is an element of clancher

with medication for dorm, the alcohol. But all of what you mean after that, for you're entrain, to do that. I'm in the cover. It's not too

engraged in your life because you can't if you can't fail to have to get in the time, it's impossible to be in the alcohol and to

get to get to get to get to get to with all the but it's a bit like your you let get to be

on the back to the it's there you're at the topy but it's the door is over

it's there I'm not I'm not I don't I'm not I'm not I'm saying I'm I'm still

I'm trying to say you to say there to there to to re-to-re-re-to-re, but it's not the case. I'm a marky the grand end of the processus. I'm totally fixed at Target

GTF, GTF, GTF, GTF, T, I'm privy. Well, it's, you know, I'm saying, and I'm not surprised that we're talking to, and your consumption, because, you know, it's because, you know, it's often, the people who are a past, who have a vehicle, they're tombe in the intensity, even what you know, it's, you know, that's for so that we're in the intensity of the consumption.

One, we'll gel some of the soul of, you know, and I'm, and I'm, you know, I'm, you know, the word gulet is important,

and I say, you know, the alcohol has the same effect the drugs, we're in general, we're in a way, you know,

it's, so. So, it's, so it, so, it's, it, it's, it's a, I'd say,

I'd say, I'm wondering, what's it's January 2009, in preparation for a great,

gross, operation. I'm Revenue of my third tour in Afghanistan Separation. Okay, right.

Seven-year, you're in the GTF, you're doing 10 years? 10 years. 10 years. 10 years after

with the GIF, Afghanistan, all that you, because it's cool that we're as cool that we're talking that we're doing

to other things. It's probably not, it's probably not, it's just I'm going to and I'm going to I'm going to

I think we could make three hour and a half podcast, without problem, but is is that

these missions not necessarily not necessarily in detail of these missions but you know you're going to you go to

get to get in the F it's not like in Bosnie or it's more tranquil if you're if you're

if you're in Bosnian in Afghanistan it's for these missions precise these missions dangerous

I don't at what you have the right to talk to talk to I imagine that even

I'm in the word to be in what I do you do not because I don't know

to talk because I don't know the technique, the tactics. But is you're you're

you're you impact in the life or you're at your place, you're in

your stint, you're serene, is that today you're doing to do PTSD

to get to the events that that who often will pop

very long after but at the moment present is these

missions during these 10 that for you you're

a point in the in the there have there

have up and down you I I love that. I mean, I feel like, wow, okay, I've had a life of a drive.

For me, I'm a little like a rock star in the forces of the army, but always in the humility. That's, for me, it's very important, to not flashed with that. And it, and it's, I'm retraped also, you know, it's, it's a go-go-go-go. I mean, with my conjointe of the time,

we're just at a moment of the same, she said, she, she, she, when you're not part of all this, she said, even when you're not part of mission, you're part nine months per year. It's that, it's such, it's a, it's a lot reality, my reality. So it's not, it's a couple of these

of the effort. It's a lot of it, it's a bit of a price. So, I mean, it was a retrapet in 2009, but it was a event that that was arrived in 2005, an operation very precise, for me that was rough.

I mean, I've found, finally, to be dropped all in a mountain. It's, an operation that we did an operation that we did in Afghanistan, and it was very precise what we had to do that,

and it was braced. At this epoch, all, all the force special was under the commandment American. And then I worked with the, I've worked with the , the few

teams of the Navy SEAL, American, and then it's a marvelous, sacrifice. We've got volled with the major pilots that the Army American can offer

with other tier one that we call, the operators of the Force Special. But this operation that, this day, and it was not

well that we would be that I'd be in tabarnoche, it's because we were a gang in an alicaptor, we had a point

very precise when we were to be able to but we were in front, and I, when, when you came

my tour to have been to the helicopter to get to get to be in the elevator to be in a lot of

I'm in I'm in front I'm in front after the final way to I'm in a helicopter of commandment

the major was there and I'm going to get to I'm at a time and I'm oh, this baby

she'll go to be able to be able to see, I'm not that's my gang is and I'm and I'm

in the car, I'm I'm in front, I'm in the operation, I'm with my gang. F'clock

in the ender, we're in a place, we'll get in a position, we're on our tour, so I'm going to do you, I'm trying to try on a position, and we say, ah, it's good, we're going to be there, we're going to be there, so, we're going to be, I'm going to person, no, no, it's not right,

I'm at 300 m'clock, at least, a day of my detachment, of my section. So, they me depose there, and I'm just all, I'm just trying to start to, I'm trying to, I justire on, I justire, and the other, the black-cock, the helicopters of course, with the helicopters of combatants,

a patch, that's a real machine of car. And I'm like, okay, who I go, me, in this bottle, you know, but that's my perception at the time. And I've got to be that's probably not so dangerous than that.

And I'm not that I'm going to be to be on the same. But, tabernac, I'm sorry, you, you're in a helicopter that you're taking to, you see, to do you, see, so you're in the world? You're in front of, it's dangerous to be.

You're cranky. So, so. I'm part of this course, that I've you've made, this journey that, because when I saw, up at the I'm still in

my way, I'm going to move to my foot, I'm going to I'm not quite I'm not quite, I'm going to be able to

play, I'm going to say, you know, I'm going to get to go to an altitude, perhaps, I know, 10,000, feet, so you

see, you're feeling, and it's, you , it's, it's not quite, the people me brewed, but it's...

Like, in a rive, when you want to to save, you're going to go, but you're not, you know, you're going,

of a few people, I see, I see, I'm saying, all the helicopters in and then, I'm saying, I'm saying, I don't know how it's the system of visor, I don't know how it's a man, that's a Canadian who's a man who is trying to gore and it's not, it's not a Afghan or a Taliban who is trying to save, and they tell the alum, you, you know, and I say, well, what's what I do you do you say, I'm trying to, you know, I'm trying, so, go, go, what's your pace, it, it's far as current,

and, you'll suffraiseries not. Not long, and, and, and, uh, this course, I'll be able to, I'd say, when you know, when you say, when you say, when you say, when I think, it's a few, when I repens, I see, I'll see this field there. It's like, rest of this coat, you know, you have some chance to get in the mountain, it's, it's finished.

All you know, all the people that you've met, all the people that are talking about, it will have been, it's all right? Ready to die? That, I'd have done before to part of an operation. I had my little ritual, my little prayer that I did, and then you, you're doing, you? I'm ready to

Is you ready? Is it when operation and the line and then? So, so, so, but I'm trying

to prepare and to be in to be there? I'm trying. But you do you do you do you do you do?

You do you make the way? I'm doing it to say, my mother, you know, we're talking about to me and

some bit of the post-traumatic and I and I've creused also. I've seen for me, it's been like

the enemy when I'm going to be to have to my niece. I'll know what's to learn

to learn my enemy and I'm going to and I consider today that I've gone to. But at this moment that,

I'm a animal there's a little cerebral reptilian that's alumed that's alimed at a cot. I don't know that I'm

not that of that's to be able to die. I'm sorry. I'm not to die. I'm not too.

Rended there, it's a rush would have moved, I think, I'd have moredue

to... At the moment where you're there, in the mission, you're there, pret to be, Before you part, you prepare to, I do my prayer.

And when you're not in the field of the action, is that, to see that, ready to die? Oh, it's, you know, it's... I'm not... I don't know. You know, you're in the army, you say, well, yeah, yeah, but,

there's a thing, to be, you know, to be ready, to say, it's a bit, but... Yeah. But, you know, when we say, when we say, And I said, I said to ask you to demand a moment of a day, how many kill that's?

Well, the famous kill. In fact, my question, you don't know how many kill? My question that would have you have you tried? I used to use the force lethal. Okay. Some of kill that I've got, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.

You know, I'm interested in other than, you know, I've heard of these stories of saying, ah, that sniper, there, an attempt, and all. I mean, I've got to do, I don't know. I mean, I've got to do it, you know, if it's been to do it, you know, by nests, persisted, not by, you know, I mean, I imagine, to try and enjoy a pleasure to enleve the

life? It's an analysis, and, and the way that we're in training, I mean, I mean, it's, there's, there's brainwashing. It's not a brainwasher, it's not a brainwasher, it's like, like the athletes professional. The players of hockey at stake in the glass, they're maybe no need over, they know, they're they're not even even no reason to have the puckusk of what it, and, you know, I'll see, I'm going to, me,

I mean, I see some of the clips passed on TikTok, you know, an UFC, let's on, let's see, the ref, en-lave the other guy, he's at a moatty of hockey, and the guy, he pung the ref, and he's a clea to ref, because he's in his mechanic, he, there, there, a bra there, a bra, a, he's fah, you know, he's not, if you're the, you're saying, so, so, so, so, so, so. So, so, so, so, so. And the way, it's so, that, we're in training, and, and before to part to our operation,

at each time, there, you know, a officer who came to me to watch, for just to pass with us with us with us with usheirs, because we're not not the deuterre, you know, it's, the rule of the best, it's, no, no, the regs of base,

it was, if you have these intentions hostile or some way, you know, and I'm the same that I've done the time that I've done, I mean,

I could say, I could explain why I'm trying, my life is in danger. There is in danger, my life, and I'm not, I'm not sure,

I'm not, I'm not, I'm sorry, if you're friendly, I'd watch you a guy, and I, I'd parted. Because at that

that's not, you don't the time to put the question because if it's not you who's not you that's not it's a lot

mindset, and in the time, to have been being, to have been, and it's that I've

understood also with the time, with the therapy, why it's I've been, my head, my spirit,

put, my mind, in the mountains in Afghanistan, to re-vo, to, at all the days, to,

I'm, to, I'm, to, I did, do you've done the good affair. If I had

had done that, what's the thing? It's a brinant, it's brilliant, and brilliant, and I was over

living it all the year and I'm saying, ah, I'm sorry, if I had to do do it, I think I'd reaffed the same thing,

to come to to come to to come to the good of the but I'm just, to say, like, no,

it was not, it was supposed to be like that and it's been used for me, because it has been to

my blessing of my blessing of the after after had been to have been the same when we

when you say when you're saying that's for that I'm that's for sure if I'm feces to see I'm like I'm

can't happen to hear of I'm at at that, at that at that at that that's the

I'm I'm at it's a turn but it but it's continue? You're doing to do you're

doing it's in 2005 and I think it's there's a few many years of mission and then this day I've got used

to join my gang and then the Appach had passed before. Clearly, it had been finished.

It's been for the Taliban, if you want, you know, there's been it's not nice. You've had you

have been some of the frere? No, no, in operation never. The advantage that we have,

I mean, we're doing, it's not the patroes, it's in offensive, so we have, we have the advantage,

the speed, all, in general, you know, you know, you're ready, you know, you're ready,

you know, exactly, exactly, it's so, it's not, it's not, it's not, We don't know what

it's going to You know when you're going to if you're going to you're going to you're used to you're used, you're

you're blinded on sure, we know what and who are people there's going to there's what, and there's the satellite

are there on the drone are there's there's a lot of the imagery that's made on live

there's the commandant know what know what there's still there's there's a there's so

that it's that's that's that's that's that's 2009 2009

2009 so I've I've made the three tours in Afghanistan, 2009. I'm coming to a country at 2008, in the autumn, November, in this corner. You separate? I'm separated. It's not bad.

I'm not bad. I'm the anxiety in the tapir. I'm, you know, I'm really not bad. I'm just a little bit of my mind. You're talking about? No, I'm not. I don't know. I'm not going to do with that.

You know, I'm a bit of anxiety. Yeah, I'm a question. Yeah, I'm a machine. Yeah, I'm not the door. You know, in the In the world, I englob that, but in what he's

made in a parenthesis, you're at the top of the malitude, you know, that's so, that's so, it's like, so, it's like, that's, but no, for me.

No, you know, I'm, you know, and I'm sorry, in that, I'm going to get a little more, to find a little bit more, to find out of

my own, I'd re-cheted the house, and I the radio, you're The TV, I show, the radio shows, I have the lavash that's all right, I'm in the same time, and I'm in this mindset,

I'm not going to hear the silence, I don't want to be able to see with my own. I'm going to. And I'm going to go ahead. And I'm going to go ahead. It's a bit. I've got to gore and a other farm per after

who's been the mother of our son. So, 2009, at the point, we had the Padgett, the Padgetton, it's like, oh, it's serious, I'm a month, Dead Commander.

We're going to come tomorrow, night. Tempete, not, tempete, not, tempete. There's this, that's what's going to be in that's going to be

to be a parachute free fall for year so it's urgent so okay it's not too does it's a patent to all the unity presson by the airport

of Ottawa and we're going to go to go to shoot in paris valley we're at free fall we'll let's go to get with

some scurinke there's there there not just in the army there's special that there's on there not been not the papuian

cranked that also the world of free fall the 5,000, 7,000 They're all right They're all right than the air than the air

than the So, so they're and they're and they're and they're soot, and the

it's not not bad. It's not bad. And a couple of times that's the vogue of

the vall the soil it's all and it's a little less and more than much and you're

doing it's you're in it's a time, it's then after that after that we're doing after that's

we're doing the airkeus it's the of the avion civil of Free Fall. It's the aviation and we're doing,

and we're going to see a static line. What that's just when you get to shoot up to shoot

free. You're not a chute-lib, what we're not a chute-il. No, you're at 5,000 feet to demelie

if your parachute it's not not bad and I don't have a great sort.

I'm not to get to get to the futue Hercul. All the what I'm on the end of

the rank and I'm say this I'm sorry, I'm the misery to the misery, is that I'm going to let's fall

by the way to it's a lot, because the vent to amaze, the feet of paris in the line of the parachute.

You can't jump pastel like that. No, no, it's a mess. I have the black out,

and it's the red, I was in trying to to descend, I said, what's what what's the what's going to

what's going to it's not, I'm like, eh, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, I'm still

carburel, there's that's not, it's not, it's not, my system me, He's saturated.

Saturied, and I was afraid. I was like, but what's it what's what I'm going to? And then, yeah, I'm afraid of, yeah, Jean-Bond, we're, pre-twe, you know, and then, and I was sat sat sat sat down, we're sitting, all right,

we were two groups to sautte, and we're sitting there, and we're all right, and then, I'm talking, and I'm trying, I think I'll have to, and I think I'll have, you, and just as time that the car, you know,

and then thezele, and I'm sorry, and I'm just, reflection this time this time. There's something that can't

that I can garroche in the motor of the car to get to get to have a lot of 24 to have done to

you know, I'm trying but I'm but I'm like it I feel like I'm, I'm,

and just at time that you a chum that's a very good chum again again, John Francho

and he he's coming to sit at to sit at the end of he passed and he's he's supposed to

he says, he's like he said, he's like, I'm I'm in trying to I said, no, man,

I said, it's not the chien, man I just say not what's the thing you know, and there, it's really

a great operation potentially the in Africa to go to get the diplomat and it's the only option to be

parachute and I'm like, I said, I said, I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm like,

all the boss are there, all the boss are there, all, and, and, all the people in the eyes

to get, I'm trying to crosser, I'm, I'm like, it's like, It's not, sacrament. He'd say, okay, what's what you want to do?

I just, what, do, do you, do it, do you? I said, do you guys, do you want to do. He said, oh, yeah, no, no, no, that's true. He'd have to talk, he said, ah, he came to talk, he says, I don't, I don't know what's going to do, I see. And, I see, and the babine me shake, you know, and I'm in a mess. And I'm like, ah, I'm in a mess.

He'd say, okay, he, so, he's, so he, he's going to talk to, he's been a little bit, on my case, and he said, he said, he said, he, he said, to be informed for you, he said, it's not long time that you've come to, you've got to separate, he said, as I'm saying,

in this moment, it's very demanding what we'd demand, you know, you're trying to, they're still at least as to do, they're doing, they do, it's just more, it's just more, I'm saying,

I'm saying, I'm a guy of image, I said, thank you, very, boss. And then, there's, someone who's trying to me explain to what, you know, so, so, so,

so, we're going, we're going to, we're going to, to try, you're going to to try to try, to try to come to get to work that's the first

that's the first time that's a first time that's got to a minute to get a question, but it's that's not that's going to

get to get in the time, so we're coming in the time, we're with a child of that, 2009? 2009, I'm super

good, mathematics, 40, 44, okay, 404, 44, perhaps, so we're,

so we're, we're, we're, we're long in the life of a man. Come on, yeah,

a bout of fact, that, you're a, it's a, And when we When we say, we're To be And then

And then And then You know, I'm You know, I mean, The soldier Yeah, The Zolde,

the GTF, I mean, I said, T'O., you know, the side Moll Alfa, we, we have a

Mourner to do to make a foot for a man, and I still,

I'm still, I'm still, I'm there's, we're there's there's often, there's much,

and I'm including, to find to face to our emotions, and to accept a

death, and to to put a genoa in time, but for your posture at this moment that, I imagine that it's, it's, it's, it's one of the things, the... The wrong.

The gross, haunt. And is that ramene the old old? The esteem personal, I'm of the marred, I'm not a pen,

I'm, how is what we call that, an imposter? I have no an affair here, you know, I've been a fraud, you know,

I've been made to think I'm all, and all this kind of, this kind of, this kind of, the discourse, that's all right, and we see, so, we're

to come in a town, and he, he's blessed physically, and I'm talking to, and I'm not, there's nothing to do that, and I'm saying, if I didn't have been blessed physically, at least, people have had a point of repair, you know, because, now, the world me demand, okay,

and, and, he'd, and, he'd, boyate, he had a job, a, , he had a gentleman, what, what, he'd, he'd, well, he, he'd, he'd, and, he'd say, and, and, you, he'd have done,

and, and, you'd have done, you'd face a moor. It's all what's It's all I'm saying Ah, okay I'm gonna

they're not to ask you So, so he So, yeah, he's gonna be able to

make a So he's Yeah, okay He said, he said, you know, to get the anxiety

and the And it's to come to the medication And I'm not, I'm not, I'm not,

I'm not, he said, he'd be curious to say, the world that's he said,

he'd say, he'd say, I'd say, I'd say, I'd say, I'd say, to say, to say,

to try to get the anxiety, and then I started to consult. He won't have been a super good psychologist at the time. I'm going to

have been a time that's made to about about about about about 10 months, there's on the time? In the time, is that's a

becky also there's a because there's not fiered to you, so that's got to the anxiety, and you're

to get it with the anxiety gluglou and then you have an estu step to to get you to a mart

I've left to get to a gluglou so it's but I'm I'm still in a certain way. Okay. It's not the alcohol

that's just a lot of morning it's a good day of training, it's a serious the job and then you're able to have a control? Yeah, it's so

so I'm, I'm going to a bit of time, the Esquadron continue with the with the conjoin? Ah, well,

that's it was, I've met a new conjointe, and then she, she was like, well, she's coming, and it's

great also for her, I mean, you know, the member of sports special, and all the I was all the time partied, and I tried to

start with all right-huh, right. So, she'll make her own, I'm very well-supporting, you know, with the connections that had. You see what's important, so, huh? Ah, it's a different, all that's. To have to be able to-do, and then. And it's for that I'm talking, just for let's say

that you're not alone in this moment. But, leave the mind, for example. We don't know if it's not going to say, if you know, leave the hand. Exactly. And the other-outre support. Look, I judge not. It's terrible.

You know, the blestineineineine. it's a real. It's present, it's something of true, it's something of that, you know, so... I rarely often related

to one of my inveter there's a there's a thing that's that you're quite with you. It's been very

to feel like a man, but you're not be supported and, you know, to not have been supported

for after that to have been supported by someone, you, it's there that you're at how point

to be well to be able to be able to who's entombed something extremely important. It's the hygiene that's necessary, I think.

We can't We're not. We're not. It's not all right. It's not. You know, we're not

the same. The human is an animal of mehut. The connection, absolutely. You know, if we go

at a base animal, we're an animal of meh so we can be able to be far, but we

have the right to have some of who have to be there's on to get to some to get to the

good pillier. it will have arrived a day, you know, we're doing from the tributes. So I imagine that when you start,

because, you know, when you want to because, you know, what you're what's the old old

you, you know, it's, you're in your, they're in, it's been in foe, there,

by the top of there, there, there's, there, there's a body armor, you know,

this bocal that, he's long, he's creu, the curate, you're, we're not, you know,

and it's an other thing that that's like that's in a lot of to be quite to be able to you're

adding to be yeah, so not only I'm sorry I'm a man who's a little bit of the officer in

so the big gun in there, there, there's a there's a there's a 2009, I'm playing,

I've done, I've had been replying these tests and some and she, and she said, well,

certain, with what you make this you're there, I'm sure, I'm not, there,

there's the signs of of the stress post-traumatic. I said, uh-da-de-de-h, we're not going to be that, I said, I said, I said,

I'll return with my gang in the Eskado. And it's there that's finished. So, so, so, for that I, I'm trying,

because I'm part of the GTF in 2012, I'm bushed, I've reached, I made all the efforts that I could

to try to to get to get, but, you know, but it's, it's a train that's a force special,

it's, you deback, and I, and I, I've not I've been not really at 100%. And during these three years,

our female is born in 2011, my conjoint who is implicated in the way possible to support it at around all of

all that. And there, it was I went with the I'd say, I'd descended, and what, it was

really shied, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, to ask you on my life. Oh, my, my skills,

my skills, descended, and it, and it, and it was, I'd like all the time of a brum,

and And, still, I've got a few years. I mean, I was going to be a rock star there. I think that I was more a plumbier. I've been working with these machines. You were not the top of GTF, but you were in a garage. Yeah, I'm a good gear in the grange. A plumbier.

I didn't want my run. It was not my place. I have some points far, I have some of the lacquene also. For me, all of what's the management, the gestion, and all of all, it's very difficult for me. So, it's not my place. But, you know, I think I've got to have been out of spayed. And, you know, I'm sorry, I'm not sure.

I was very Fierre at this name after the surname that's the same in the English

even the English I'm in a little in the Frenchie who had used to do you

know that there's a little that's a music that serve, I'm tawier my

place that that group that is not necessarily that's a simple that's a thing, it's a

thing, it's a thing, and during these three years, during these buched

I've been too, it's it's going to it's it's it's going to in the piece,

what we're called the house clearing or the CQB closed quarter battle, it's going to end up in fact

you're in front to view the point, you know what to see what you have to do you have to do you do it,

then it's part of to the rest of my capacity to analyze, to process and I'm saying what's what's what's what's

I'm, I'm, I'm just, I'm, then, no, it's just, but when you

when there's consumption of alcohol that's in the job, and you, it's, it's, it's not,

it's not, It's not when your When your When your It's not clear You can't It's impossible

It's impossible And I'm impossible And I'm Petted after that It's that It's got That's made The Borde of

The Vos I'm gonna I'm gonna On the cement And then it Yeah The head That time

It's a Aft Agenau In plus I'm put in Agenue in plus My mom My assette

Tepin Plus the Afto So, Just to A rendezvous to see With the doctor

Because during that time, when you're blessed, you're talking on these categories medical, you know, I'm saying, okay, I'm I'm doing, I'm doing,

I'm doing, I'm doing, I'm doing and then you have like a presentiment, also that's all that's a conversation

with the doc, that's, you know, that's a lot and I, and I'm in his bureau, and he's

and he's gonna, and I'm gonna, and I'm, and I'm, I feel like I'm done. I'm done. I'm done, I'm trying to

to try to try to try to try to I could be to change? There's, to the unity that I could I can't, I don't I don't know

I'm going to I'm going to see a question. Is that for the guy, for who's your life that's that's in

the same time come to become a dad also? I feel like I'm done. I'm done. I'm finished

for the army but is that it's finished, all you're finished? The life is finished?

Who? Who? Who I'm is going to do? Is the idea noir embark?

Yeah, Because when we say, you know, I'm in, you know, I'm in, you know, I'm in, you know, I've been, you know, I'm saying, you know what? I'm not saying, you know, I'm going to be here. Bye. I'm going to, who? I mean, after that, well, okay, he returned in the

house, and when I said, wow, is it really that that going to be really that going to be? It's the end of a life, it's the end of a career, it's the end of an identity. You know, I mean, so, where's it's going to be. The identity. And it's that that many veterans

live also, it's the famous crisis identity when you're in where my gang there's a expression that I

like I got your well, and I got your six, I got your back, because we're with an carderan an o'clock, 12 hour

being in front of your two, six hours at the right to three, nine. So, you know,

when you said, I got your six, I got your back. I got your back, brother. You know? And then,

and I was like, hey, I'd be, it's like, I'm trying a little to surveilling,

me, and who will surveyor the mere? I guess it's to get to be to get into and anyway, so I'm not

out of suite. The guy of adrenaline Ah, there, they're not back but with the time, I've got to me to serve as

to have been able to to be able to the problem at the problematic with the alcohol. So, a little bit later,

I'm returning in the house, I'm gonna be the big boss who me about, the end of

the adjudgeal chef who'd be able to be yeah, I mean, I'm on here. I don't know what he wants to say, but I can't say, but I'm going to say,

it's my speech to over the war that's what you're going to make. A year and a couple of time with in the bureau, very emotional and he finished by

saying, well, he said, he said, it's a week a week, it's been a minute of service of your posting, he said,

I let's start a one time to get. GTF. GTF. Not the army? No. I'll have to

posted in another unit of transition. So this week, I'm trying to see, all the equipment

that I had, that's why, the radio of medical, the gun, the NVG, all these things are,

we need, I think, even my vest, my genre, my genre, I'm doing, I'm not a rambot,

I'm not a tsuer, I'm not someone who was going to do you do that, but it

that's, it's like, it's like, it's like my identity, and it's like my second po, you know,

and I'm still, and I'm again, my vest, at the court's, all the equipment.

I said, I said, I'd do, do you, to do it? I imagine it's like a police

that's a bad, it's a bad, it's a terrible, it's a bit terrible. And I was, and I said,

oh, they'd say, we're doing, they're like, I'm gonna do you, no, she can't, no,

it's been with my gun, you know, I said, I'm not a of fuzzis today, I'm gonna

but I'm to get this gun, that, you know, to get, to get, to get her, to get her, to do you,

something for me, and that's, it's like these images that I said, oh, see, it's really at the time of trying to arrive, I'm trying to make it depoyed of my identity, if you know, you know, the last day, I'd remit my pass, to access, on the bar,

I'd say, I'd say, a minute, and he said, I'd say, I'd, I'd say, I'd, I'd, do, I'd, you're doing, look like, eh? Looks like it? Like, um, you're sort of this day, and I'm over at my

car, and then, I'm going to, we're going to, we're going to, well, we're so, we're sort of, my conjoin'at, my son, my son, You're there, my female, and all that, but it was a... And I was going to

and then you'd like, oh, okay, here's your dossier, what do you do you do with other things in the force? It'd be able to do do you do with

civil and all? And that, I thought, I thought it's a rough, because I think that I was one of these conditions in this setup

that, and they're not when you're with the force special, your coat, it's the top secret to secret.

My docket my dossier is sacred. So, they don't they start not they care They know not their capacities.

They know not your capacity. They know not their capacity. They know what they're going to. They're not going to see. But, you know, it's GTF. So, we know, we're having, we know what you're doing, but what you've done,

they've done. They don't know. They don't know. They don't know what I'm doing. And they don't know, and they say, well, at some point, we'd have to do you do what to do you

to do with me? There's been honest with you. You've been 15 years that you've done to do you to do? Yeah. That's you're going to

that's you've got to. And then, you know, I said, it's because we we know nothing on your you know, we're doing, we're going to not what I'm doing, I'm going to I'm going to, I'm going, I'm going to see, I'm going to have,

I'm going to Chris Lape. I'd go to buy down my garage. So, I've said, I said, you know, it's an uniform, I don't know, I'm going to be, you know, my number of telephone, here's my address, it's there that

I'm going to have. I don't know if I'm trying to see a sergeant, ben cool, at the time, you know, who said, okay, he's he's paravalin, you're going to do person's just me to have just

me to have to every time every time, like the time you do you do you know, like that's so, so,

so it's been even in a couple of years. So, it's like the chomach paid by the army, if you have been able to

you, it makes it up, no, it's there's been there's, you know, I'm, you know, that's, you're

saying, we're, would say, we'd say, we'd be there to be there to work with decadet, I'm looking, oh, okay,

we're just come up, now, now I'm done. I'm done. and I'm in the moment, so so it's a lot of time. So it's been a couple of years,

and after that, you've been to arrive at the sortie official of the Forces Army in 2014. So I imagine that to be chie-you- with your blonde and petter the face,

and it's sure that the bottle it's a round and there's nothing to see, you know, you know, you do see, some of, you

do you do something, because you have to be in the army, basically for, to continue to continue to continue to, you've got

no choice. You have not sure. You face your boot, you know, and I'm and I'm made. And is that at this moment

that you, we're in the next we're in the entire, we're just in the affairs of army? It's made

so it's made to reculon, in fact that I'm very conscious that they're, they're they're doing to part of the

base to today, they're parted of today, they're they're creused. So that I'm me

to know, I can have a property of cochin, I've never to stop to consider. And,

there's of what that was to put to not I'd have to continue, you know, I've got to continue, you know, I've got to continue, I've got to continue,

I imagine that I've never had never had a tabernoche for a while in tabernoge for a long time. You're quite? You're quite

in this moment that? Absent. Oh, yeah? I'm doing my but I'll I'll forget, I've got

through, I'll just, I'll believe these grand bouts of conversations, I'm in a big bit of a little berso, in the auto,

you know, it's not that, it's not so, And my blonde at this time, the pedal in double, she had a job. She had to be, she said, I said, she had two

children at the same. And she said, it's a lot of, so, she's, so, so, so, he's,

so, you know, I'm a man, you think, you think, that's a few, that's a life? Yeah,

it's a thing, when you think, she's, she's also mean to say, bye, she, she, she, she,

she, she, I, because, because, I, it's something of which I, I've thought,

I've been, And since I've ever frowned, it's not changed the spirit. It's changing the don't know. I'm saying, for me, I'm going to be in honest, I'm fute, car. The number of times that I've been in the night, I've been to have been to sleep,

cuched in my garage, when I'm in my dormant, I'm saying, I'd say, come to, my God. I'd say, my God. I'd say, but you'd be here to get me to get, that. I'm talking to come here. It's important, what you're saying to say,

because, because, that, the moment of the off, that we pass, and what we think, what we can't, we know what we'll see never what the year has never we're reserved.

So I just not let's I'm just like my year 14 years 14 years he's he'd

be in between the three, four first years it's just these flashes. I'm absent,

I'm not I'm, I'm aggressive, I'm not, he went to save a couple of times, you know,

the cry of an man, even again even again, it's a cry, it's a

cry, it, it's a I'm like, ah, I see, it's an infant, I like, I love the children, I like, and it's like, and there's a couple of that's, and I'm

glitch, you know, and I'm in the bra, and I'm like, but what's it what's going to be? I mean, I want to have a full,

the same self, and I, I'd say, I'd say, ah, what the fuck? So, it's, it's,

it's, it's, it's, with my mind-sid with my son, and with my conjoin, you know, who,

who, The number of nisery that's like I said Tried, I'm saying a lot of prison because I got shot the gasket in a bar, and it's not a bad place. It was an 10-November. I'd go to the landmere at 11 November, I was there, you know, the energy was not good,

and then I'd have to be able to getchaque with someone, and it's degenerate my affair, you know. So I'm... You're going to cuvay in a cellul? It's solid. I'm re-revelled. I'm re-revelled. I'm surevening to me. I was re-revelled at my number of my number.

incul, and some of my, I'm going to have to have to have to have a few, I'm going to have been in operation, maybe, I don't know, I'm going to, so, so, so I'm like, wow, I'm running there, yeah, there's been, yeah, he's ended up, you, he was,

I was, I, you know, I'm in, six and a minute, my wife, at the night, with the little, she's where, I'm supposed to go, to the Surveen of the city, Ottawa, so, I'm like, so, I'm, like,

wow, it's, it's really of the mess, my affair, you know, and, and, you, and, before that, it, it was the last first time with the police, two-frey, the police is coming in the

house, because, how's what we call that, not violence conjugal, but the grubes. The house, it's a degenerate. You petted the plon. Yeah, petted,

they got, and you get to get the contact with the reality, and all that, and it's a part, and two times, the police at a house, a night,

he'd be, he'd have been to he'd have been to five in the house, you know, when it's a when it's a veteran in crisis,

there's, there's more than more than I've had more, there, so, there were two policiers, two ambulances, and a job at 3, 4 o'clock to the morning. Then, I was like,

again again, fuck. I'd say to be normal, but I don't, I'm going to be. T'all? And I've continued to buy, and then, and there, and there, de, dyesia to travel all that,

and it's, at the end of the 18th, my blonde was super-occuped with his work at the time, I'd try to support to do more that I'm at home, you know, And if it was there, my conjoint was not there,

and we'd be able to, and we'd be able to think more with the alcohol, you know, and there's not a, there's not a bottle that will give you a response. I've been lichy, de facto, even, even, de fatted in thinking that the genie had to start, and all that, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's gel, it, it's, it's, and just that a certain moment of the day, that I'm shoo-red. And I'm there and I'm afraid, and I'm

doing it, I'm doing a moment I'm at a minute, and I'm at least, I'm in a chair, and I'm trying, and I'm doing, I'm doing,

I've got to do. I'm going to do. I'm going to go to get to go ahead. I'm going to get to the night morning, what he made get to the

the rullet of the valise that that's on the car, you know, I'm saying, I'm just, I'm and the valise was made, you,

and she, she'd, she'd, she'd, she'd, she'd, she'd, at the house with my wife when she's all right okay we're already all right all right all right all that I was able to

to do this journey there and I think again today I said to Mary Pierre I said all that I said all I said I said I said that would be too to me but I said it was not to do you I don't want to it's not it's not to she platt that you had to be at round she said I've had a little bit of misery to

but she said okay it's I'm trying. It's important. And I continued to have to be, obviously, at a other moment

difficult, we're doing, we're doing, and he's reparty, and there, contacted one of my good friends who is Pompeyer

Agatino, who, he, also, had had used his defy with an look of a on a few,

she said, he's been to be in the day, and I'd go to get a in a day,

and I'm in the last time, the same, it's like, that's the last time, I'm due

to see, I'm just I'm still a to-i, I'm still a I'm still a lot. Yeah, but there's there's been there's been a lot. So,

so I've got to do you know, it's a lot of anxiety, the attacks of panic, it's, I think, I'm going to

get to die, so, so I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, you know, that's a chum that's,

and I'm sorry, you're at at a car phone, I said, I said, I'm at the place, it's all right, I'm going to be

going to be able to, I'm going to do, oh, no, man, I said, It's not much more than the total. The Stanley, the arm, the Gadzile, you know, it's a bit of a mess. You know, I said, okay, you know, you see, what you want?

It's what you want to do. Well, I said, I want to be in front of this liberty, that. I don't know what I'm going to do. I mean, I'm going to say, okay. So, the day, we're on back on the telephone, and then, finish by having to have, as a response that the mayor thing to do is to go to

to the hospital to get to get a very very well-treated we've got to have come to a certain in the

part of a other dimension and you know and a person who is very important for me today Karine, who

was just in a case in a time, I had reached to be able to contact at through this and I said

what's what is what you can do you do something for me, can't come to me to do you, and even come to

me to get me to at the hospital and And then I passed two days there, and then after that, she'll have found a place here in Montreal at new

depart, and it's like I'm going to a cur of a cur in a week. So, so it's like I was in front. I'm ready,

I'm ready. The timing was good for me. There are that we're doing 16, you know, but they're not

made, the 15 premieres, they've been not made for us. Yeah. You did it

did? I'm couldn't, for you. I'm pooh. I'm pooh. And I'd say again,

Eric, what's you want to do? I'm going to do. I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to save for me. Because, in plus,

you know, you're not conscious of all these traumas at that, I imagine, and again, and the army you've got

enfermated? In the sense that, but, you know, but when, you know, infermere,

you're in a bar, you're in a car, that's, so, you're not liberal, you know,

I'm not, you know, Not the card of, you know, it's like the prison, the army, but, you know, you're in in a car. If you're getting something, you're doing someone. It's in a other month.

It's a lot. So for you, it's, it's what, it's, it's, the famous poe. Yeah. And not too, you know, at some part, we're all a little fucky.

You, your PTSD has been the worst thing because it has made sure, but at the most time, the mayor of course, because it's, it has permitted to,

to, to, to, to, in the fucking bow, but for repair everything. Absolutely,

that's what I'm able to say what I'm I'm trying to the other time. I'm trying to count. I think I'm at 13, 14 years, that's 14 years, that's been 13, 14 years,

that I've worked on me, that's called there's a psychedelic, there's a different sort of therapy. But you've done to have a therapy firm this week, but there's a

year, there's years, and there's years of the ballet that have been passed to see before so, and the work, it's made

the recululon. So, we've got to work what's going to be with the forces army, the missions, where is that my head had to rest

the pre-privile. And then, okay, it's good, it's a function well, it's not to be able to

have any power of vigilance, you know, I'm not to snap it in the traffic and all, but there's

that's we're getting there. Now, I'd not, I'm just, I'd just, he's,

he's dead, I'd be in with that, I'd be able to I'm in all the time to be able to be able,

I'm just, I think, I think, 15 years more later, we have I I have to do with I, I have done to do with my day. So, we have done to work on,

I've done with my time, to, you know, to accept. Check, the father, we need to do. We need to do that. We needy that. So, yeah,

roll a bit there on on the top of it, and then, then, because we had to come out of the place, you know, that's what, you know, that's what you're

that's the preys, and I've been and I've been in large, it's all the , it's all the , you know? Before we're

just on world, the therapy to be termed of six weeks, Is it has been for you capable to to break the cycle of the consumption of alcohol

at this therapy I've never consumed it's not right I've been in these in these contexts in the context very precise

I'm the same I'm sure to go to Loo but I'm consuming like a drink a or two

or consumed for you to tart petted solid? No, a very there one there one

once when just after after having met Mark Andry Chabot for the book I was at the

writing during the time and the pandemic had started to get a beer, that I'd would have to be

to get in the face with it, a scratch ale that's almost to get to that's usually, that's that I was

I was doing one, I'm just pre one, and a couple that it's a end up and a couple,

it's a and it's a for me, the declick, it's not, it's, when you saw, the alcohol in

in-back, the state if I'm back, the state, if I'm back, before that, I'm correct. So I'm sarranged for

to have been to have been in a vres, and I got when I got, I got married, I got, fuck you, monastic on my haters.

I'm not afraid of to you, it's me who are saying, oh, but that's, and I'm with the fire, yeah,

I'm sorry, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, so I'm gonna and I've been never rebuished. We're gonna be like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, I'm gonna make my head, hey, you're colis, that tabarnack,

they just to make the t'clock, just to make the yole of a lion, it's acer, but if you're enerved with an steak before, so, you know,

so, you, that's, so, you, it's the, you're far, but it's the worst thing, but it's the thing,

they're doing, they're doing, they've been, but it's been, but the next one of, I'm gonna, I'm gonna be able to,

yeah, that's a, you're, you're, you're gonna get to, you're gonna, you know,

it's me, it's me, so, so, so, so, so, We were to have to be in the army, we're in a

napolee, we're in a, we're, at this time, well, I was, you know, we're doing, well, we were, you know, we've been to have to be able to see this beer that, the prete also, the prete also, it was next to, okay. Yeah, I'm going to start to get it, we're doing,

to do, you know, but what's it's weird, to say, that's just for that, but, when you're having at this moment there, there, there's something, and we're coming to discover, it's what, there's, there's there, there's still,

there, there's still, there, there's, there, There's still a lot of a lot that you're going that's it's a long when you're going to

you're going to there's clear there's clear all it's clear it's clear and she's to continue to work in therapy

and in individual by example the idea me is coming like that I said to my therapist at that I said

it's a couple of years that I think to say the idea me play to make to make a

to make a plan to and I said I'd don't to have a affair of the life of this man, but I said,

at some of the time, it's like I wanted to be valided. I wanted to so, so, so I, so I, I just put my,

my, my, my little change, I got to, I said, what's the thing, and what's how it's, how it's,

a bit of the position, so, after that's the great interview, filmed, that's durer, three-hour, three-hour,

three-hour, three-and-m, I'm out of, it's been, it's grueled, I'm just, it's a gala, and,

and, I mean, in my head, a coup that the interview with the police had been finished, and it would end up, because it was a crime of epoch, I mean, I said, I know the system judicier. I mean, it's, you know, it's going to die. Well, no, he was arrested. He was arrested with four chief of accusation, and that's just for me. I don't know if there were other victims.

I'm descended to Gatino for a lot of Pellate of Justice at Quebec for the at the beginning of the inquiry preliminear, and he was in the same piece than me. I had to ask her a man, the Fama

to have offered the Famaque, who had been being there, and they were being very all the team,

and she said, you're sure, you want, they're saying, you know, I said, you know, oh, go,

don't, we're don't, we're not, we're not, and he was there, you know, he'd be in back to see, and then you're

in a question that had been and I'm at the question that he's there, he's there, the tabarnack,

And then, it was like all the scenarios because I didn't have been able to see, I mean to get you don't know if I'm to pass it to

between the two hours, but I said, and the scenario that I've used, you're repensate to get, mental. You were enfooed,

but... Oh, yeah. One day, I'm saying, I was fantased a bit there to, you know, to check-allet,

to me, to be a week, to be a second to do with to check- his all-re- and, you,

you, And, listen, we're saying, huh, he'll have to have to have to be to say, it's a little it's not,

it's very, very complicated, to, you know, there's a bit something, there's a lot, there's a

thing that to not, to be able to be able to be a , to be a , right, thank you.

Thank you. And so, that's a little victory also for me, because, you I'd have already made

so, so, I'd be so, you know, you're not, it'd be easy, you're not easy,

you guys are trained killers. I was the first time I was trained killers I've never seen I've never seen It's sure that it

can be part of the responsibilities according to the environment, the title of and I'm never perceived like that like a shooter to train me but that's

that I've fantased that's the past to be able to it's just arighted because there's there's a difference on to be on mission and

to be a murtrier and so yeah I'm not for me the time that the time that's it's part of my job um

I'm to government. You know, so, I'm going to see that, the deposition was made to have been

there, and after that, after the inquiry preliminar, he'll attend. You know, there's a process, and there

there was a date of process. And then I'm going to be that, it's going to be a questioner and again, and my mother

there was there, and I'm there, because he had been able to have to go to and her, she had been

a day, like, a week a week the police that's in charge of the dossier, he called, Mr. Guimaud, he said, oh, what you said, what's what you're doing? What, what's

what I said? I said, what's going to do. I said, I'm going to have an offer. Ah, my shty, you feel your old show, eh? So, they've wanted to negotiate. They've had no recourse, he's not had a process, and I've got got to be. My cause is it ententee, we'll let's say,

to make these chief of accusations, but not this, but not the one, that, but not the one, I said, that's what he's been made to get to get to the rest to get to

the rest of the but I'm in but it's that I'm in that's been that's been that's not because he

had to go to go and the aggression that's the age adult so he's he's evicted

probably label pedophil and no he said that I'm that I'm that's a

that's a question sexual sexual on a minor he's been he's been arrested for that and

he's probably for me he's probably So for me, I'm I doubted that it would be to bring up a certain

reconfort, but I'm excuse me, because you said, there were an inter-court because I'm against the

abocas, excuse. Okay, no, it's that, because it's a court, because I'm no,

no, because you're not, it's not, it's not, it's not process. Or,

process, in the point, so, in group, so, in group, yeah, he applied the

coupables, that's so. Excuse, my, no, no, no, no,

but, And then, you know, is you with, you know, is you the church that's for that I'm on all right. But no, because we're at all the criminal. In my head, it's like, it's like, it's not. Civil, criminal, and that's for that. Is that, is, is that the, I'm going to have two questions. The first, is, is it been tempted to go to civil,

justly. We've got to go to search a reparation at the level of the Church Catholic, and all that, something that's been made, very often, and... In this moment, my dossier, is with, There's a big recourse collective, what's going to do, also, is there in. Okay. It's not going to be able to go to me, but I'm not certain that I've got to

live all right. I'm not. I'm sure. My mother, I'm sorry. And then, after that, pay an avocas. I'll have this money, you know? Yeah, and then, and then, there's a lot, there's a lot. And then, there's a lot of people who are there.

So, my cure, me had in this moment, you're in a recos collective, make confidence, is what you wanted really? But I wanted to be, I'd be it. I'd be it, I'd be it's been able to, that you've given, that you've ever, what you have lived, it's that that's a

good at a point in, and that's that's a correct, it's a thing that's it's not

a good at a question, have you have you have you have to be by letter, by something

or just, you know, I imagine, the sentence not you not the does not that's

not quite normal, but you don't know, what you're going to do you want to do you're

to try to it's not in my head. Yeah, exactly. It's arrived,

and if if you, the fact that he pleads of the coupable, he comes confirmed. He came confirmed, and what I said, me, I was the time, you'd say,

me, he's too fragile? Is it too mo'emone? You know, I'd say, he'd say, he'd be able to say, so bad that, you know, I'd say, there's, there,

there's, there, there's, there, people, who've been, you know, we're not, we're not, we're not, we're trying to,

but, you know, so I'm trying to, you know, I mean, you know, I mean, I'm My mother But, yeah,

But there's 6 million of Jews who are In a It's true You know, You know, You know,

I mean, You know, I'm not Denegris What we've You know, And so, You know,

And I'm, You know, I mean, A person, You know, You know, You're, You know,

When you're You're in You're like, You're like, Hey, Well, Yeah, But, yeah,

But, But, you, He sniff a three-in-in- But, you're , I'm not a problem, me, that, you know, in

some of the I think not that's a good karma to want to do the life of someone in the affair, you know,

by example, I continued to work in therapy, I've done, the therapy of group, by the therapy of group

mixed also. I'm very thank the people who are to accept these arms in this group that.

And then during this day that, it was like a little a retrait of six hours. We had

a march in a cemetery that was a cemetery, and I'm I was coming in a cemetery, and I'm done, you know, I'm done with all that. You know, I've passed to other things. And then, and then, I'd have tried rough this journey, we'd say,

I'd say, like, I'm not in the bon suit, and I've got. And I've got to hear, that for me, what it meant to say tomiture, I'd have to enter this chapter that of my life. Finish, there. And finish, that. I'd feel that it'd be a good job. That's where I'm here that.

And then I've been to talk, and then, and then I've got to do it, and I'm going to do it, It's in the book. It's in my conference. I'm going to talk about to get to get ridgation sexual because there are

there's a lot of more than you don't have anything to get to get to all the aggressions and all this. It's terrible, but you're

there's a lot of people. I can't say, we're going to say, it's what the percentage? But, I'm, I think,

that's what all the men that are pasted, I think that more of the majority I think I'd probably even not of the women,

because there we're we're going to we're going to it's 50% almost so, but yeah, but yeah,

but yeah, there's a barna the people that I've got who I've seen who have to 15, of 25,

of 30 years, of penitentiary in the car, they're not they've made there are there's made victims,

but at the base, it's, it's, it's, there, there are victims of

plenty of things, a child of four-year-old that's a suicide, it's a victim. At a other level, but, you know, it's a rare that you do get,

what you do negatively when you've been there, I'll say, the psychopaths, it exists, but, you know, it's an leagre percentage,

it's like if I let's to do make a sense of mindset, to, always, to work in function, to me run

to some to my retablishment, I'm like, no, I'm, I'm, I'm,

I'm saying retably. You know, you know, you know, I've said, we're doing a little bit,

so, we don't know I, I'm not, I'm not, you know, I'm not, we're not, we're not,

we're in the month of the time, you're doing, the person with you, you're, um,

we're, we're, we're, we're not, we've been, we're not, we're not, you know,

it's sure that there'd have to be the word in the word, um, look, it's sure, we're all

I don't know a copy, and even when you me when you send me to me, I'll post it on the reason saying, hey, after the episode number, I don't know until the

title, you know, it's available this book, so if you want to get on some on saying, it's sure that we will have a

place of choice behind me. I'll have to have to be an copy in person. It's going to be an enormous pleasure.

It's, it's bizarre, in the way it's happening, because in my re-tablishment, I've I've met with you.

There were people who had who'd have to be there's a media there's a little bit of there's like there's like there's like

the famous force special that's that's true it's mysterious people who know it's what you're like a trend no, but I

think we could be talking about just of that's and she she said, she said

there's a point she I think there there'd there'd be there's interesting to to share

I'm at a bit, you know, I'm talking about I'm trying to I'm in in the anonymity, in Northseur, and I'm not to say, you're trying to me say to talk to all, but you're trying to be

talking to talk to that, but it's like if I reconnected a little with the Traveyor of Rue, you know, I've always responded to the same thing, if you think that it can't help, noosephed that's the same, that's

maybe to tear, it, a gashat, whatever, with her health mental, it's not, perfect, Jean-Back. You know, that, it would be a good rap-up, but I'm not rap, I don't know if I'm going to talk about I'm saying, but it's this project that, it's on the world, what you mean to say?

And it's weird because yesterday I sent a message, I had also a podcast, and she has posted a message that she has received, a girl who feels the pop, and she said, hey, I'm going to, hey, listen, I'm doing, and I'm doing, and he's made a lot of good, and she's, it's

it for sure to receive that. These messages, I, man, by 10, by month, and I'd say, if your your book and your your parkour can't get to have

to get a message that, it's not it's not it's not me, I'll know

to be able to people who say, that what I'm doing, that's their meeting, that's what

I'm that's a fact, they're not, the project because not my are my

invite, I'm I'm the place to do you and I don't know that I

think we I'm on lence many I'm a much to I'm to

they're to because it's not you it's you you're you other, but

that I'm in life. I'm going to last year I'm past, and my episode, I'm, so I'm, so I'm, I'm,

and I'm, if it's, if it's that's been years to make a year, and if it's,

and it's, it's worth a pain, it, it's a problem, you understand? I, you know, I,

this project, that was 10 episodes? That's it, it's my plan? You're at what? You're at what? 10,000.

We, we, we've deposed the sense, that, I don't know exactly. We're at almost two and a minute.

Wow. And then these messages that are that's made, okay, I think I'm that I'm

talking about, now. Today, I'm not janeed to say that I see that I live in the but I'm

not. But I'm playing it to continue. And I would say, I'm able, I mean,

I've been I've been I've been years without live to my podcast and I could live

of other other things also, you know, I mean for a good for a good, you know, in the

fond. So, and I, I'm sorry this message that, and even if you do it

not, because it's not that's not, but you see it, and just the fact to

to do it for this motive that, to all my respect at 100%. I have I'd have

been, we'd have been to, but I'd want to be to be the question is,

um, it's party, your blonde, with your Yeah, we're separated today Is she

Is she revened after that or this separation that's made that? The first that I was That's, that, that's, that,

that's, that, that's, that's, that's, we've got to a bit of time. Okay. She had part on voyage

with some and she and had and said, no, I think I'm still I'm still

I'm still and I'm to continue with you, and, I'm, I'm going to I'm going to I,

I'd be able to, I'm I didn't have We've got to We've got to And then, with the time I'm going to

say, the damage it's been a lot of pressure, it's been a lot of things in front of

and then it had been to the separation She had not, she has not had not the chance to

have the version Alin Guiried at 100%? If you it's not to know,

I don't know not be there not yet 90, 95, so I'm still, we're always

something to have always something to No, but what I'm in all of all, I mean, perhaps that her role to her, just to be supported to protect her during these years-a-law, because she's very solid, and very strong,

thank you very much, to have been there all this time. We have a wonderful woman and I think she had enough. She's a bucket, she'll have been in place on course. It's a person who will guard a place of choice in your life. Oh, yeah, I mean,

today, she, she'll have to be someone of another. Yeah, but I'm always, you know, I've always be, there. I have a monsieur in-in-thead, Lauren who he's

he's not he's not quite you know I'm going to have to find 30 years I'm not really

she's a person important even if I know she she's she's not she there's a

there's a person like that if you don't have been in my life my life would be

she'd be there so she she'd she'd so that in some she's

in some she's of the family also we're she she's she'll

she'll her she'd be she're she she's correct also to see, no,

and my guys are made. And your and her, she, she, she, she has access to Alan?

Yeah. She has access to her father? My my best one my life. I'm trying.

I've been and I'm continued also. I've done more of therapy a little intense of a

way, now. But, but what continues to be to be to be

to be, I mean, you've been there's there's been during the pandemic, I've been

written two hundred twenty-ke page, and I top of the same, you know, it's not... We'll probably... We'll probably...

It's a lot of... Feree a lot of... Like, as I said I said, you know, I said, I've ever... You know, it's

the same as it has come back, with the Malin, Radio Canada. It's a genre of podcast on on their platform. And it's the name has been,

in the public, if you have... There's been... There's been... There's... ...you've been... ...re... ...and...

...the... ...the... ...and... ...theirir... in the house, and it's Pierre Rivler in return in Montreal, who he animated at the time, I'd like to have this guy on the show like, I'd like, I'd like, I'm going to say, I'm at least, oh, you're going to

start with his seat, you know, and he's a guy who makes up by the pole, and I look at, gross smile, you know, hello, Alain, super sympathetic, and it's Mark Andrey Chabot, who had to the realization on montage of two men in

art, and he's he who had written the park of a baton, the biography of Etienne Boulay. So, he me said, He said, I'd listen to talk, and he said,

Krem, he said, he'd say, if you ever it's a part to make a thing, he's about a word, I'm sorry,

I'm sorry, I'm doing this, I think it can't add just a person who's suffering in the moment, I've not

I've been to I've been to right, yeah, at 14- at 14-a- your daughter, is, is

that, is the discussion? Because, you know, you're in the podcast, live, and do you know,

is it, is some, is the discussion that's, with her with her, I think at 14, we're able to be as a lucid to understand

and as to who you are, who has been, what you've been, what you've ever said? I've been talking about necessarily in a detail, I know, I've seen, that's not been easy, that I've been with a gang a little special. And he's not been.

The past, also. I see that I've had my my defies with the alcohol. So I'm asser, today. I don't know to mount a prison around the cause of that, I was going to be eventually you're going to be

exposed to the alcohol I said I can't be able to be able to you can't you're not to be able to be there's a point in you know what I'm

saying you're not you're not obliged to to beatt at the face with your and then you know and I see also what I'm still there also

for a certain to try to get you know that at some moment of the time you're in in a situation where it's

that's a weird there's someone there's people there's never long. And so that's man,

away. That's, when you're when you're talking about to say, it's a little

telephone to get to be in anywhere to be in anywhere where, you know,

my my kids are they're, they're, they're going there and they're like,

never can, that's right. I'm at this hour that I'm that I'm

that I'm a father present, I'm a father over, I'm I'm today.

Before, I was quite I was farmed, you know, the Foss Pes Special, the gym, the party, and it's about

just that I'm about just that I'm because if it had not been to say, if I had not FACA more than

a person that I'm sure I'm not the FACC Oh, I'm FACA Yeah, there was a

triple platform. I'm not, you know, it's not a necessity to descend on down.

No, but you know, today, but the person, but the I think, I think,

I think, I think, I, you know, I respect, but I'm doing, it's a guy who has been a tabarnat and he's done to say that,

and it's not to be able to be able to say, because you know, because you've been to be able to say and I'm not-al-a-laise.

No, but it's correct. It's correct, I'm really, I'm a mal-alise with that. The important is that you're

to be al-aise with that. Yes, because I want to acced to do you to say, that sometimes we go

there's affairs, sometimes, in the people to be able to talk, and we're to do you, and we're

to know what this person that's a it's a other two missions that's a little bit of that's like, it's like, it's like I'm

saying to make sure, I'm gonna be I'm gonna be like that, you know, I'm gonna let's see, there's a minute, some of course, the S&S who

have made, the dismission there's, I'm there's a lot, that's gonna be that's gonna be about the army, I think, to

think, I think, I'd say, I think it's that's a experience human, and that we can reach through all this,

what I've achieved, is that we're able to go to be able to search, if the people are there, the victims of aggression sexual, the veterans, military, first-respondent, who are the famous

diagnostic of post-traumatic and depression, you know, that you're not all, the dependence, I said, I've been like a trough, it's a few, it's a part of the game. I mean, I want to end up to say, you, have talked of a judgment by the appearance, you know, and, you know, the judgment by the appearance

will come with someone. No, but, you know, it's, We're going to come with the sans-abry, the seal. But, you know, I'm going, where I'm going to, not because the guy he's grand, not because

the guy, he's great, not because the guy is colossal, the guy, he's burrow, that the guy, he is infaible. Exactly. You know, we're not, it's so, we'll not judge it.

You know, the example, and I'm talking, and I'm talking, there's a guy who can't, or in chases, or with a can, you know, a plough, to shoot, we're

to getroche, to you open the door, we have a point of repair. We know what's going to happen. Someone who comes up, when you're going to cry, we're going to be afraid of panic. We're going to be sick. No, he's not fool.

He's blessed in this moment. He's not malacres. He's blessed. But also the reason for the case, is that the guys who have of all the air of all, the guy who have to look of me and who have to this style

that, you know, you have the right. We have the right to not filet. You have the right to say, I feel the poor, you have the right to go to get a little bit, You have the right to make a genuine to doer. What's what I'm doing to do, when it's a few-of-a-half-a-old, and I'd be a little bit of a tru-toe,

I was just a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit of a lot. I was just on a talk of Therene Fleury. I'll see some of the Calgary at a retreat, Induracrui, a coup stannley, Hall of Fame, captain of the team, the group, the gross affair. And this guy, he finished his career. I think he'd lost in the league national. He's petted at the face.

He had jocued, he was used to intoxicated almost all the time. And he's finished in a moment of an end, with a gun in his mouth, he's ready to get to get in a moment, that's the time of his life, when he's he started to play hockey more young, the first

year that's been recruited by an team in his village in his village, it's made viola 250 times by his coach. That, for me, it's been the first that I could connect with

an other man. To relate to 100% Yeah, I'm like, I'm not too much, so today, because I've never conned a pot for to do whatever,

the leave, but come to come there and, and I've come to be, and I understand that I've had the view that I've had

to pass on the time to find the lesson that's to get to understand, to be in

simply. I think what's that's with all what you're to say, but it's not,

you can't ask, even if you're not, even if you have not, but I'm that,

but I'm saying to man, you know, you know, you're the you're the right to

get the to be able to get used, you know, no, no, we're not, there,

there, there, there, there, there, There's some people, it's not, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I've, I, I've,

but I've had, you know, the genetre, I'm just as well, and it's correct. And, you know, it's worth, and it's worth, and it's always, and you know, and it's always, I'm, because, I'm having, I,

just because I, I'm sorry, because I'd never, and then, it's someone who, who, who, is someone who, that's, I know, let's go, let's go, let's go. Let's go.

you know, so you know, be able to, being able to, like I'm saying, to be able to, but to be able to be able to be, you're going to be

an veteran of the Forces Army Canadian, I imagine that you're also with the VAC or not? Quebec,

without aid in the criminal Yeah, yeah, but is that is that is that is not,

but you're not an indemnization, there's not there's not there who's been to the level of financial

for a part of all, If the recoup collective go to the front, we're going to when you're a victim,

you know, in the case, maybe you know, I don't know at what I'm there's not there's really, it would have to

see, no, I think that he's probably because, no, because you're a victim

of act criminal. The Kavak had nothing for me, that, I've said, and they've got,

and they're not, we're not, they're not not really, and I'm not the same old I'm that's correct,

it's not that, so, that's a Retraithee, or outrothed, what's just going to to be done to see, leave, possibly conference, is all right? I've done to say, a coup,

at prison of Blinville, to staff, the prison of Blinville. At Blinville? St. Jerome? Okay, that's the same. You just, just, just, when you were to bring a new vote? Yeah, you know,

yeah, you know, so at the prison of St.Geron, where I had done a little conference, to staff, the prison, in the school, a couple of times, a couple of times, and I'm, and I'm open to do it, in fact, if my view

today, it's that it's that it's so that it does that offer to offer There's conferees that I call these partages, these talk. And to reach to try to

amassed their money, what I want to do do you have to make a foundation to be in trying to and what I'm trying to get some

that or these sous there for maybe eventually to open a center of a home of repis. We have a

we have a need to be so what you do you, it's using your vehicle, your car,

for don't know, for don't simply, pay forward. That's it. I'm don't serve not the

same for the same reason, I'm in doing the cout in when I'm in front of my voice,

I'm still in the way, I'm still because I'm very much to do you know, I'm like,

she's not that she's she's very desired this point of this point of because she is merited.

You've been to me to see, I've seen in many of things of situations in a

time for to camouflage that, that's, that, like, that's a moment

who's been really me to try to talk about when you have talked to talk about

to be a few, we're both a lot of podcasts that are challenging for me

but I appreciate because it as, as as 90 percent I'm at

70 more, so that's some, there are there sometimes we're

not pretty, but some like some that sometimes

me me, me me, I'm realize certain things and it's important

and it's it's a part of the reason for the reason for the project that so Alain, sincerely,

thank you know, thank you to your partage, a long podcast but really, really interesting sincerely.

Couping on a bit. Oh, zero in bar, man, it's there's a part when you at the

toilet, if there's there's that you're going to be it's you're not at the

television, I'm not a journalist, I'm, you know, I'm going to you're saying,

because I think it's one of the researchist who said, we'll have to we'll have to be, we'll have,

if you're going to if you're going to, you're doing, but if you're going, I'm saying, you know, I'm doing, I'm doing,

you know, more big than we're, in saying, one of my researchists, Catherine, who's,

so, so, no, but, but, we're going to see, the way, you know,

you say, ah, maybe, if he's, if you know, if you're not, I'm not, I'll be there,

I'll be there, I'd be there, I'd be able to, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Bravo, sincerely.

It's a pleasure. Bravo. For, for the parkour than for your service military. In fact, thank you for

your service military. Bravo for being to have been quite to be able to be able to

be able to be able to be itting. Thank you I. I think, I know. I know.

I know. I know. I know. to , and I also, because it's

the people are people who have been if you have this is that I'm

this this is you have at the person, at the person is what

the future reserve. If I had made fine, there there's

plenty of things that I have not made and as

you, I I'd like to remit the sea, whatever, or whatever, no point to that I'm not going to

my ideas. So, we know, never, never, what I'm in reserve. It's so,

it's a long, but... It's so my message also at some where it's in a fair in in this moment.

Arrette not to be just, just to be to get to get to the little , I,

just you're to put to get a time you, the life can't be able to be be able to even after.

We're to be talking about to your book, it's sure that I'm doing to do

the promotion with great pleasure. He's going to be in a place. It's going to be

really a place of a place of my place to show behind me. Thank you and thank

my auditors, to have to have to listen and and thank to understand

to who want to why I receive this kind of invite

who are essential and important. It's that, the podcast for

a part of there.