Aunty Donna Podcast - Jeopardy!

Episode Date: September 8, 2026

We parody Jeopardy! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a Grouse House podcast. How exciting. Tonight's guest, Mark Bonano from... Turn off, turn off. Again. Tonight's guest, a little Sicilian man from Hopper's Crossing. It's Mark. What happened?

Right, it's faded out before the vocal that's baked into the... I think we had a little more time. All right, go again. I'll do it quicker. All right. But let me know when that's coming. I can't tell. All right, well, we'll just, I'll just roll through.

And I'm not, Zach. Give me a character name. Tonight's first guest from Hoppers Crossing. It's Mark Bonato. What's up? And from the Hills of Essendon, Australia, it's Crazy Pete. I'm pretty up, though. Let it finish.

Let it finish. That's it. That's the end of the whole thing. Yeah, it's just a rip-off. I have a real episode, I think. Yeah, let that roll for a sec. But it ended. Did the video end?

Yeah, it ended. Oh. That's how it ends. Ken Jennings. Do you want to talk about hot, like a hot cut of meat? No. Just bring up like a juicy piece of fourth battery.

Tonight's guest, first contestant Mark Bonanno from Hoppers Crossing. And Crazy Pete from Essendon Hills. And it's here host Ken Jennings. At the Gilquarty. Hello and welcome to, hello. and welcome to Jeopardy. An exciting night. What was my name again?

Crazy Pete. Crazy Pete. Here's our first bring up the tiles on the board. Boop, boop, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo. Our first one. Is this, is the show called Jeopardy or D? Jeopardy with an exclamation mark. Right.

Jeopardy. The first thing. So the questions aren't about, huh? The questions aren't about whether the answer's jeep or D. We'll see. We'll have to see. Exciting ape. Know your math.

Is it Jep or Jeopardy? Jepp or D? Jeep or D? Or is it? Or is it? Hail Caesar or Caesar Hale? Can you say them again? Read them out real quick.

They just did pride of you, so just read it out real quick, Bobby. Exciting apes. Know your math. Is it Jep or D? Is it Jep or Jeopardy? Is it Jep or D? Famous. Oh, another one.

Or Hail Caesar or Caesar, or Caesar Hail. And then how many, what are the numbers? The first round is 1,800, 600, 600 and 200. I'm Ken Jennings. And I'm Crazy Pete. And I'm Mark Samuel Bonano. Correct. Sure.

Let's play Jeopardy. Frank, I'll take, is it Jep or D for $1,000? This known person is the host of this show. Buzz in? Buzz in? No, I don't buzz. The thinking music plays. No, that's the last round.

No, no, don't play the thinking music. Buzz. Buzz. Mark. What is JEP? Correct. Mark again. Choose your tile.

I'll take, is it Jep or D for $2,000? The thousand's the most you can do. What? A thousand is the, he was reading backwards for some reason. I'll, for a fucking 100 bucks. $200? 200. $200 is the lowest you can do.

All right. Then just tell me. Tell me. 200 then. So say, I'll take. Jepp or D for $200. You might have this when you're having a steak for lunch. Crazy Pete. Is it Dijon mustard?

No. Mark. What is? Actually, you have to let me finish the question before you buzz. I didn't finish the question. D, I thought that was quite clever. Dijon mustard. Yeah, okay, you could have it then.

Thank you. Jesus. Crazy Pete. What was the movie one? Famous Cinema. I'll go Famous Cinema 200. This actor died playing the Joker. Ooh, Mark.

What is Jep? No. What is? Okay, I've got one. And I think you're going to really... The time ran out, unfortunately. No, what can I just... Can I just...

Heath Ledger? Correct. But can I have, can I do my one? Just can I do my? No, not yet, Tom. You don't have to think yet? I just can't remember his name. Who played him after he played Ja?

Jared Leto. I imagine what is Jared Leto's career? So you're minus 400 now, crazy Pete. That's minus 400. That's, that's halfway through the point. You have to pay. You have to pay. You have to be on the show if you lose.

You buzzed too much. You lost the point. You're losing money. You're losing money. It's not how old. Yes, it is. You're hemorrhaging. I buzzed one.

Hemorrhaging cash. And I lose $600. You're bleeding chips. You're bleeding chips. I did 200. And we'll be right back right after the break. And then we come back and we go, now welcome back to Jeffity. How much did I lose?

Why do I lose four? You lose it. Every time you buzz, you get it wrong, you're losing money. But why did I lose $400 on a $200? Because you lose double. You lose double? Do you lose double? No, I just, okay, so you lost.

That's the only thing that makes sense. You lost, you lost, you lost, you're, you're, back to zero. What? I'm back to zero. Nice. Now Mark, you went to acting school. No.

Well, I don't know. You didn't go to acting school? Not wrong person. Why did you go to university for? I never went to university. I'm a bum. I went to acting school. Maybe thinking of me.

I'll get to you, crazy Pete. Now, Mark, what did you, tell me something about you? I refuse your question. Well, how bad luck? Because you told me you're a bum. Well, how long you've been a bum? I'm going to bum since the day I was born, brother. That's fascinating.

I just bum about the main streets looking for a lube to get all greasy. For his bum. Because I'll have to grease up. I just need a sentence answer. And I love to slip and slide around the streets of Melbourne. I use the pavement like a summer boy uses a bunch of plastic garbage bags taped together and a hose on the grass. ass. Well, thanks for coming on Jeopardy. Once I used a slip and slide and I hurt my tummy so much that I took the next day off

school and everyone called me a pussy. Is that real? Yeah. You hurt your tummy? Yeah, I think like the ligaments and stuff. Like that? Or more like, I was just doing it so much. I was like, I couldn't bend over and I was having trouble breathing.

That's a crazy story. Now, Crazy Pete, you went to acting school. No? you got we're getting all your information he's just said on camera frank he just said on camera i didn't say that yes you fucking i never said that this isn't blocking if you get if you've got your information wrong this isn't blocking that's just trying to help you i i never went to i want to i would why would i say that it's not true what's something fun about yourself i'm crazy why why you're mentally ill or no just crazy what do you do what do you some crazy things you've done

he's nuts oh yeah just generally crazy I haven't done any I'm just a crazy guy What How are you crazy? He's nuts about peanuts I'm nuts about peanuts Love my peanuts

There is no Have you ever met someone who's nuts about And I know peanuts aren't technically a nut And I can I be really clear here Can I be really clear here I don't get just the peanuts I get the mixed nuts But I love the peanuts in the mixed nuts

Yeah Yeah and he's dating a woman called Hazel He's nuts about Hazel even though I wish I was dating a girl named P yeah because I love peanuts because he's nuts about peanuts I don't mind hazelnuts he's nuts about hazel nuts he's not he's not love hazel nuts you know I love peanut

salted peanut a roast a roast of oh nut teller no I quite like yeah and what's in what's in what's in what's that that's made out of hazelnats you love peanuts and he's nut huh he's nuts It's about Tala.

Oh yeah, he loves pen. You love peanuts. He love, this is crazy. This is actually fucking crazy about him. To talk. But I read your biography in preparation for this. I mean, it's my turn to talk. You know, you got to talk and you fucked it with your bum stuff.

But it's true. Fucked it with your bum stuff. Oh, I fucked it because I lute myself up. It's my opportunity. So this could be on SNL. This is a really strong jeopardy. Farity. So it's my opportunity.

It's just not, it's not quite long enough. Not yet, not yet. Yeah. But you're asking me a question. What did you say? You love peanuts. No. No.

All right. Well, let's play. Mark, the board is with you. He's nuts about teller. Four? Out of pen and teller, and he loves Nutella. I just wanted to make that clear. That's true.

Pick from the board. I'll pick Star Wars characters for $1,000. True. This nut is not a nut. Mark What is Salacious Crum No

Where is those weird Those Chinese dudes In the first one It's real full on No the answer is peanuts Ah What sales that that was This

Nick pick from the board Mark What I'll be back I just did the ad break though I did the ad break Yeah He put it in the parrot.

No, now's the real. So that was the ad break in the pretend show. We're doing now's the real ad break for the podcast. What is going up? So we're just doing an outbreak for the podcast. But not a real one. Not a real one. Not a real one.

Pick from the board. I'll pick me, him. I'll pick, uh, lube-up bums for $200. This lubed up bum walked around Hoppers Crossing and hurt. No, you've got to wait till the fish sentence. No, I don't think I do can't. No, I don't think I do. It takes a risk I'm taking.

That's a risky tag. You can't press the button until I finish the same. Well, then you need to talk to your tech team because I'm able to press the button and it makes a noise. You can press it, but you both lose 400 points. You hear me? If we both lose, that's fine. Isn't that usually a third person playing? Yeah, but they died this morning in 9-11.

All right, so I'll finish your question. Pick from the boron. Wait. Who is Mark Banana? That question's gone. Can I pick from the board now? No, yeah, pick from the board. Famous movies for $800.

George Clooney features in this Cohen Brothers movie. Mark. What is Where Brother Are Out There? No. What is O Brother where out there? No. Yeah. What is Cohn Brothers?

No. What is that one that we? romantic comedy that they wrote but weren't intending on directing starring Catherine Zeta Jones you know that one that was from like 2005 and they wrote it but they were like we're not going to direct it because it's not really a common brother's style of movie and I think Hank Azari is in it. Oh no what is Troy? No.

No. Yes. What is? Oh no he wasn't in the nut. Hail Caesar. Hail Caesar. Do you remember that one with Catherine Zeta Jones? I don't know what that is.

I don't know what that is. He is in O'Brother where out there, though. Oh, yeah. And he is in that one. What's that one? Mark, the board's with you. I'll pick hazelnuts for $1,000. George Clooney would have you having a shot from this pod company.

Too early. Zach? Crazy Pete. Crazy Pete. Crazy Pete. Crazy Pete. What is Nescafay? No.

Mark. What is an espresso? Mark got the board. Board is with you. Oh. Yep. What is Mark Bananao? That is correct.

Yes. Boards with you, Zach. I will take Zach for $200. Okay. This. And I'm not Zach. I'm crazy Pete. Yeah.

This. Terry Fellow is in a comedy group in Australia known for eating pudd. Buzz too early. Mark. Mark. Who is Zach Rwain? Yes. The board is with you, Mark.

All right. All right. I'll take, is it Jep or D for $500? That's not an option. Why? $600. This is a name. Just round it up.

Okay, to what? To 600, if that's what you have. Okay, 600. Jepper or D for 600. Is it a 500? This is a letter in the alphabet. Mark. What is D?

Yes. Mark, the board is with you. Does I have to be? Yeah. Okay. I'll take what I had for dinner last night for $1,000. This pizza has all the meat. If you love it.

Mark. is meat lovers. Yes. Crazy, Pete, you really got to pick up your game. If you fucking say that to me again, I will cut your fucking throat. That's why he's crazy. That is the board done. We're at the final one.

We'll be back after this ad break where the question will be famous authors. Famous authors. We're back after the break. Welcome back. Rob Bell. This is not a buzz. This is the one where you draw. I have to draw the picture.

Oh, you're right out. You've got to write out the author. So the question is. this author wrote The Day My Bum Went Psycho Hit that music Tom Tom hit the music

Yeah hit that Hit that thing I'm writing it And you got a wager You got a wager like how much you're willing to How much do I have? You go like two grand Can I wager more than I own?

No How much do I have? You go like five grand Yeah All right There we go Okay, let's see. Oh, we are, we still thinking?

No, no, no, no, that's the end of it. Okay, Mark, what was your answer? I wrote, who is Andy Griffith's, and I waged $0. Okay, Andy Griffiths is correct? Great. And, well, let's see. Risk nothing with nothing. You've got the lead.

Let's see, what did you say, Zach? I mean, Crazy Pete. Is it any, I wrote Andy Griffiths as well. Yeah, and what did you wager? Two grand. So you get 4,000. And our winner and carryover champ is Mark. I still win.

That's why I wager nothing. That's Jeopardy. I knew that there wasn't a fucking chance you could beat me. If I just waged nothing, even if you bet everything you had and won, that you would still not beat me. And it was not worth. This is the fucking worth risking my victory. I'm going to snap now. You had no chance.

I'm going to snap now because of you. And it wasn't going to give you. fucking chance. This is the fucking bit in Joker where he snaps. I'm going to, this is the bit in fucking falling down where he snaps. Oh, what's the question?

Crazy Pete. What is a dead man? That's my question. That's my answer. I'm going to fucking kill you and then dance to some fucking violin in a dirty little toilet. What is, who is all talking?

You've made me fucking snap. This person is all talk no bar. I've had enough. Who is crazy Pete? I've had enough. I'm existing in this, in this society without enough mental health care, without enough fucking money for me.

I got a. I'm sick of the pressure. I've snapped. I'm going to fucking kill you. This person is more full of shit than a hessian bag, full of manure. Who is crazy fucking Pete? That's my fucking... Go fuck yourself.

Go fuck yourself. You're fucking lucky I'm not going to snap. I was just fucking threatening you, but you're fucking lucky. You're fucking lucky I had snap because I'll fucking kill you. I would kill you with one arm behind my back. My good arm behind my back, I'd still fucking kill you. I would. I would fucking, I would fuck.

And I fuck you, man. What goes snack, snap, crackle and pop. My answer is fucking who is crazy paid after I beat the shit out of it. I'm going to fuck your mum. That's what I'm going to fucking know. She's going to fucking like it. Not what is fucking rice bubbles. You got fucking cunt.

You fucking, oh, who's fucking, you get $5,000 fucking dollars. Because you fucking, because you're not, you're not ready to fucking buzz. I got a grand more than you. Yeah, but you're not ready to fucking. What's $5,000 thousand dollars? You're going to get two more. As soon as you're up against a real fucking person, you can fucking lose. I could buy a bigger guy.

I will fucking. I will fuck your mom or your fucking dad watches and he'll say thank you. Thank you for showing me how to fuck. This person is impotent and couldn't fuck my mum if they'd go it. Who is crazy Pete? Who gives a shit? Who is crazy Pete? That's my fucking answer, mate.

She'll fucking like it anyway. She'll fucking say thank you so much. This person needs a strap on to fuck your mum because of their limp fucking dick. Who gives a shit if I'm going to crazy Pete for $1,000? I'm going to fucking kill you. Up to six grand. I'm going to fucking snap. I'm going to come back.

I'm going to make so much money. I'm going to buy the fucking restaurant that you go to every day. I'm going to fucking buy it and then you're going to fucking regret it. But I've got investments in all fucking companies. It's for coming on Jeopardy. I'm going to fucking buy the restaurant you going to every day. I'm going to fucking ban you. Who is liable for threatening one of the other.

Oh, that's awesome. That's not even going to cover the flight. That's my answer. Well, how long has this episode got left? Another 10. So, welcome to the, welcome to the, welcome to the, welcome to the back rooms. Oh no.

Put some spooky music on Tom. Have we been in a liminal space this entire time? I didn't realize. No, no, it's just the shops weren't busy yet. Oh. Oh, thank God. I thought it was in back rooms. No, no, no, just the shops weren't busy yet.

Well, I'd love to hear the music, Tom got. Welcome to Welcome to Investigative journalism. Yeah. For the last 15 years, it's a shot of me driving. For the last 15, for the last five or so years, how many years have we been doing the Auntie Donna podcast? Ten.

For the last, Jesus. For the last 10 years, Auntie Donna have been doing podcasts. But one day, earlier today, Broan Kelly pitched an idea. I walked into the office and I simply said, I've been watching a lot of jeopardy. Why don't we do a parody of jeopardy? A simple idea and a fun one. Jeopardy has been used across the world as a setup for comedic ideas,

most famously on SNL, some of their best and most famous sketches. I have employed the Jeopardy structure. Little did Broda know that he was going to be dealing with two of the most obnoxious root boys that ever he's dealt with. I didn't know what to make the Jeopardy idea until we started getting into it, and I knew at that point that if I didn't bring it, my A-game to try and lift this concept up, bring something new and fresh to it, that the podcast would fail. And honestly, at the end of the day, I really don't know if I did enough.

But what they didn't have it in store was the fact they had a psychopath in their mix. So we've been following Crazy Pete for over seven years now. We've known that he's been involved with a number of gangs and cartels. He worked for a number of years At the Melbourne airport Sorry, I'm not stopping this bit I'm not stopping this bit Tom just pulled up a big block of chocolate

Well And none for us Tom is that Tony's Chocoloni All for you No I was thinking of just having a little bit of it You can have some if you want Oh come on mate It's not

Bring it over You can't have a big block of chocolate Not share it with everyone No other Tony Chocoloni all on your own Unless we get money from Tony Chocoloni, Tom, can you beep every time we say Tony Chocoloni and blur it out? And there's something. There's also something that needs to be said about Tony Chocoloni. One of the mistakes I've made in the past is saying, oh yeah, can I have a piece of your Tony Chocolon?

Oh, yeah, we've all been there. And then, oh, little do you know, it's not broken up into squares. It's not a grid in the way that your Cabridi-Dairy chocolate or your Whitaker's. chocolate is. Tony Chocoloni isn't that? No, it's in all sorts of crazy shapes and sizes. And so one piece, one piece could be a tiny little piece and then the king of Tony Chocoloni gets the rest of it to it. What type of Tony Chocoloni is this? A biscuit in it? It's very chewy. Oh, okay. It's got a chewy. It's got a chewy, it's got a chewy

biscuit in it? It's got a chewy biscuit in it. It's got a chewy biscuit in it. Zach, I'm sorry to stop the special investigative journalist bit. It felt really important. What is the name of the Tony Chocoloni? What is the name of the Tony Chocoloni? Chocolate caramel. Chocolate caramel. I thought there was something quite fun.

No, thank you. Because the last 730 report I watched was about drug cartels getting drugs in. Yeah, I think let's just jump back in. I just, I felt we needed to stop because Tom picked up a big block of Tony Chocoloni. Yeah. I mean, I'm having chocolate now. I think it's fine. I think we're not going to notice.

Keep going. Was this the same piece of music? No. Go back. I can't go back. What do you mean you can't go back, Tom? You're just going to have to make it work. Go, Zach.

It's not the same. What do you mean you can't go back? Is this the music? Yeah. No. But it works. It's not the same. I've got an investigating crime playlist.

This is fine. It says a blend of tracks to soundtrack a suspenseful crime documentary. Why can't you explain why you can't go back? Because I just clicked on something. I don't know what I clicked on. Take it away. No, it's just all the same.

There you go. There we go. Okay. The chocolate's not compromising your ability to... I've got to be honest. It is a little. Yeah. But just power through.

Yeah. Um, what would Tony Chocoloni do? Um, make some more of this delicious chocolate. Yeah, probably. Come up with another crazy flavor. Um, so, Tom, could I grab another piece of Tony Cuclone? Is that all right? You should be really clear and not being sponsored by Tony Chocoloni.

Tom was just habits of Tony Cuclone off camera. Wait, and there's a couple, I want to, there's a couple blocks of Tony Chocoloni in the room. Yeah. What happened? Maybe we can investigate that. Why was there multiple people in the room? No. No.

Mish wanted chocolate yesterday when we were recording the Mission Zach podcast. Did she? I thought was a Mish that went that? You were aware of the Tony, Zach. Chocoloni. Chocoli-chol-a-loki. Why would you assume I was aware? Because there's two names in the Mission Zach podcast.

One of them is Zach. And you, unless I'm wrong, unless your name's Tony, and your surname is Chocoloni I'm assuming that your name is Zach Chocoloni It's from You know where it's from You know where it's from

You know where it's from Amsterdam You can get Tony Chocoloni in Amsterdam I'm sorry that Jeopardy didn't go long enough I really I was shorter than most SNLs sketches where they do Jeopardy. And better.

Is that okay to say? Is that okay to say? Probably one of the best ever. Yes and Al's was a Jeopardy. I agree to disagree. Okay, do the investigative journalism bit though with the Eaterly of Chocoloni? Sure.

But I know the... Oh, I guess that would be the case. It was just a regular day on the Auntie Donner Puck dog taking some of us. That was for... Yeah. Crazy Pete. Crazy Pete. It was just a regular day.

regular day at the Auntie Donna podcast studio. Auntie Donna are a comedy group from Melbourne, Australia, best known, because this is 730 report, best known for their Netflix series and Auntie Donna's Coffee Cafe on ABC. Everything was going as normal until someone noticed something. I was enjoying the parody that the boys were doing on the podcast with a huge audience of diehard fans that listen every week, Wednesday morning in your inbox. the only donna podcast inbox of where you get new podcasts

if you went into new podcasts on whatever platform you use would say there's an auntie donna one up okay so I'll just stop you there Broden the question was can you just take us back to and remember to answer the question You're eating Choney's Tocalone? Oh yeah Chonies

And you're eating some Chonis Toccoloni producer Oh yeah Where did you get that Tony's Chocoloni? From Tom. Wow Isn't that what this Reports about Yeah where they got the Tony Chocoloni

Probably from a I know you can get at Coles Nick I was gonna say a bougie supermobile I was gonna say where I assume If I see someone with Tony Chocoloni Yeah I'm thinking they got it from an IGA Can I actually count to Tom's claims

Tom my memory of yesterday Unless you back me up here if I'm wrong Put the music from Michelle wanted Now my memory Go back to the other one What can't you just fucking play my memory of the day.

What's the fucking programming you're using? Before. Was that? My memory of the day before. Single music program in the fucking world. You can't go back. You fucking kidding me. What are you talking about?

I can't go back. Can I just say as well, I think the clip that you use for this week is it's called We Parity Jeopardy. And then it's just these two like saying they're going to fucking kill each other. Go on. That's a good clip. I'm a little peek behind the curtain there, guys. I remember the day before shooting.

Tom at the time claimed that it was Mish that wanted the chocolate. My memory was slightly different. My memory was that Mish wanted a soy latte, which you requested on pot. Oat latte, which you were placed in a hot. Get your facts right. My memory was that it was Tom and Lucy initially discussing the chocolate, talking about how we don't have chocolate in the office,

possibly even before Mish arrived. In fact, I believe the eating of the chocolate happened after Mish or around Mish. I definitely don't think Mish was the one that requested the chocolate, but I could be wrong. We asked Tom this question. He took a while to answer. He took a little while there. No, I think you're right, actually.

I think it was like... Tom answered in real time. I think Lucy was like, I'll grab some chocolate. I was like, yeah, grab her some chocolate. She was like, yeah, I'll get some. And Mitch was like, ooh, Chuckie, yes. And while you're out, can you get me an oat latte?

What? So, Mitch. Mish asked for an oat latte, which is mid podcast. Yeah, mid podcast. But that's two stops. Yeah. Because there's no, there's nowhere. I mean, you've got to find a special place that's selling Tony's chock alone.

She did then ask for it to be cuck. She asked mid podcast. She did then ask for it to be cut from the, Mission Zach podcast. But then she referenced it later. But yeah, I mean, she does that all the time. But now, now, I think even if we do cut it from the Mission Zach podcast, which gets a fraction of the listeners of the Auntie Donna podcast, now it is known on the Auntie

Donna podcast. Yeah, but nine, ten. That's like me saying, like someone going to go, I'm going to go get an oat latte, me saying, great, can you get some dried dog food? Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's been. Mark, Burby boy.

Because I was thinking about Tony's Chocolonis. Well, thanks everyone for. listening to this episode of Jeopardy, a parody of Jeopardy. We'll be back next week to do Jeopardy again, but with Zach or Mark hosting it. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. It's this season, this season of the hot meat. There's, because within the hot meat category, I'll be hosting Jeopardy next week.

You got your roast chooks, you got your Silver Side. They don't need to know. And you've got your hot pork. They do need to fucking know Broden. Tom, can you play some sexy? And you bet, I haven't even mentioned the fucking roast beef either that you can get sometimes. If you get there early in the morning and the, um, uh, the fucking,

uh, Sam Altman was like, Eroshe Chook and Jeopardy, now we've moved on to the, the, the silver side of the hot meat. He, he's, the enemy of the Fantastic Four. Silver side? Yeah. You're thinking of the silver surfer.

Who, um, I think is boiled in brine. We'll see you next week for Jeopardy part two. Posted by me, Zach Rowan, or by Crazy Pete. Intolerable cruelty This episode was brought to you Thank you Tom What

Tolerable cruelty starring George Clooney Uh Captain Zita Jones and Hank Cazaria I didn't notice that actually And we'll see And this episode brought to you by Cadbury

Top Deck Yeah This way Which might be an issue If you love a bit of White chocolate And normal chocolate Get yourself at Top Deck

Don't say normal chocolate That's racist Cartagena You've been listening to the Auntie Donna podcast. Thanks for joining us for another Ripper episode brought you by Auntie Donna Club.com. See you next week. Welcome to the future.