Aunty Donna Podcast - Mr Worldwide Mark & Mrs Worldwide Mark feat. Alex Hines

Episode Date: October 7, 2025

Unfortunately Mark died and/or was double booked so we’ve replaced him with Mr Worldwide Mark (Alex Hines).  LINKS  Follow Alex on Instagram @alex.hines___ Buy tickets to our DREM World Tour https://tour.auntydonna.com/ Follow @theauntydonnagallery on Instagram https://bit.ly/auntydonna-ig  Become a Patreon supporter at http://auntydonnaclub.com/  Join The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/auntydonnaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode is brought to you by us and our new sketch comedy hour, DREM, heading stages globally now. Book at tour dot auntie Donna.com. A listener production. Hello everybody, very special episode of the podcast is this week. Alex Hines is in. If you don't know Alex Hines, get ready for a crazy episode. If you do know Alex Hines, this is going to be fucked. Hello and welcome to the Auntie Donna podcast, the greatest fucking

podcast in the world. If you are watching the podcast, maybe you're seeing the visual version. Maybe we've uploaded a clip on Instagram. Maybe you're watching on Patreon or the Auntie Donner Club powered by Patreon you're watching the visual version. You'll see that I'm wearing sunglasses. I want you to know to everyone watching

and to the listener. That's not going to affect my personality at all. I'm not going to be a cool dude or anything like that. I'm just wearing the sunglasses. Now, as you know, sometimes Mark can't make it. Sometimes it's because he's dead. Sometimes it's because he double books. himself.

This is one of those days. Where? Which one? The double book. He's never died, actually. It's never been a death. Sometimes we say it's death because it's funny to imply that we've, you know, we will die. But I think if one of us died, we wouldn't just replace us very quickly.

I think we'd process it. Maybe we'd take a break from the podcast. Would we? You'd jump. Well, I suppose actually we'd have time to process it because we record head. Yeah, I think we'd have, yeah, I'd only need a couple of weeks. All right, we're back at it.

Anyway, Mark isn't here, so we have replaced Mark, yet again, with a new Mark, trying out for the role of Mark. This is Mr. Worldwide Mark. Welcome. Darlay. Um, I was going to put on this ball patch and glasses to be like pit bull, but. Well, do you want to know why we have a ball cap and sunglasses? Does it say ball patch?

Yeah, yeah, ball cap. sunglasses of white. Do you want to know why? Yeah. Because they came in a bag together with a little goat, little, uh... Bipel kit. And it was a pit bull to promote pit bull. Have we got it? I think Mark.

We turned them into eyebrows for Mark. Okay. Anyway. Mr. Worldwide Mark, thank you for being here. Brodom, would you like to wear these? Yeah. I'm going to get their mum, Brodom, while you talk to Mr. Worldwide. Tell us about yourself, Mr. Worldwide, Mark.

Well, I'm from all over the world. I'll be from, um, Deep South. You'll be from. Yeah, I'll be from deep south. And then I'm coming up on here. Like, I don't know, in British, I love these eyebrows. I just couldn't decide on where to be because I've only had one coffee today.

Mr. Worldwide is a character who jumps around the world, is from everywhere, is from nowhere. Already we've seen them as being from London. We've seen them as being from the South. Tell us about yourself, worldwide Michael. Well, that's it. I'm like the one in X-Men that's blue. I'll just be whatever I want to be. No character choice.

Except when you got played by, who played her in the second version? Jennifer Lawrence. And then as Jennifer Lawrence's star rose, she more and more used the disguise of Jennifer Lawrence. Yes. Now, and I will be becoming Jennifer Lawrence at some point. today as well. Wow.

Because that's what I do. Oh, wow. Mr. Worldwide, Mark, I've noticed when you have moments of sincerity, whether it's talking about Jennifer Lawrence. Now, don't you dare say I go into my normal speaking voice because that's all part of it. Oh. I'm dipping in and out of my Jennifer Lawrence. I've literally run out of countries.

I've done British and deep down. Where else is there? Where else is there other than England that I'm allowed to do? France. Oh, yeah. Yeas. Yeah. Do you flee.

Forget. No. Fisch. Actually, I was watching that. Oh, no. Submersibles. Docos. So we were talking about submersibles that imploded before we went on air.

Oh, no. Sorry. Go on. You were doing a. French accent, it reminded you of Ocean Gate. Go on. Yes. Because one of the ladies, her father, was once in the, where am I?

Where am I literally geographically here? There's her lady, one of the... Yeah, the daughter of a one of the people. Would you like to do the French accent? Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, bonnet. Ah, yeah, bonapete.

Oh, yeah, bonnet, uh, Miss Cousy. Ah, where, where, where. That's from Euro trip. Fosci. That's my duo. I can only say, I can't actually say more than three words at a time. Jean-Mabelle.

Ah, where, where? So you were talking about Ocean Gate? Oh, she's French, is where I was going about. You know, Mr. Worldwide can be from all over the world, and he doesn't have to do an accent. He can just have your own voice. What a lovely way of saying. stop.

No, no, you can pick one. You can jump around. Yeah, it might, when it comes, it'll come and I'll just do it. Yeah. In terms of character building, I'd say that it's pretty weak. But it is, it's like a shadow, you know, I exist when I exist. And sometimes I'm not there. How are the sunglasses making you feel missed the worldwide mark?

Because I'm wearing sunglasses. Oh, yeah, let me put them on and see what happens. Yeah, see what happens. Bro, do you have, we don't have sunglasses for you, but we do have your angry eyebrows. Maybe I need this. They look great, by the way. I'll take a little photo. Mr. Worldwide, Mark, what can you offer this podcast?

This is a job interview, by the way. Oh, okay, sorry. Grab a seat. Right. So, okay. I was like, show me, but I'm looking at the photo. Yeah, it's me with angry. In real time.

What can I offer this podcast? Right. So, yeah, I'm offering the podcast. bottomless creativity. Give me an example. Porridge. Porridge. And what would we do with porridge?

That's it. I'm giving you a jumping off point. Wow. Yeah, this is a lot you could do with two for one deals. It's mainly like restaurant foods. Yeah, you just. Well, that's where I'm starting, but my dexies will kick in at any moment and then it's going to be, you know, I'm offering a jumping off point, a platform.

I've actually forgot my own. voice um you know platform discussion i can you know guys and seriously and just as you know i and this is real i know a lot of people know this about me for real that i do have a psych degree really i actually do have a psych degree isn't that funny you heard it here first mr worldwide mark has a psych degree yeah and and and what do you think a psych degree can do for the auntie done a podcast well i think that people people can i be sincere for a moment Oh, absolutely. We like to get into the nuts and bolts here. I love that. I think that people really connect with you, you know, beneath the silliness, beneath

the sketch. It's a real sense of community and that's what the world needs right now is community and connection. And I think that I mean, I would argue that some of the biggest issues in the world right now are because of a bit too much of a sense of community. Yeah, that's polarising community, Zach. And that's where you've got the silo effect. And what I'm looking to do with my psych degree that I haven't used. in six, seven years and didn't get my honours in, is to just get rid of those silos, to break them down and foster a sense of community.

I'll give medical advice, is what I'm saying. So you think, you believe that our comedy podcast could break down the silos of division that are creating the problems we have in the world right now. I absolutely do. Well, that would be different for us Because we mainly do the, like, Sam characters or we do, like, you know, land party characters. Goofs and gags.

We're pretty weird. The porridge was more on it. Yeah. Like, we're not for everyone. Okay. It's part of the issue. Yeah, that is an issue for me. I am famously for everyone.

What about... Yeah, I get that. Channel 7's knocking at your door. Channel 7? Do you know I have been on Channel 7? I was on today, tonight when I was a chart, recommended Christmas toys. So don't tell me about Channel 7. Recommending Christmas toys,

my babysitter was a journalist at the time. So there's a video of me smashing bugs like this. This feels really like I feel disconnected with these glasses on. I like it. You look cool. I mean, what's cooler than being disconnected? Can I be, Zach, could you take a photo of me so I can see myself because I think that will give me character?

I'll be honest with the listeners. I'm embarrassed about my lack of character. I actually studied. Worldwide Mark has put the bald cap and sunglasses on for clarity, everyone. Oh my God. You look great. You look like a star.

I look incredible. Sorry, to get us back on track, you're on Channel 7 and you're smashing bugs. Yeah, smashing bugs and my brother had a watch that was like talking to him. And then they cut to, there's a video of us smashing bugs and then it cuts to the RSPCA and they're like, we think this is a disgrace. They shouldn't have it on the shelves for Christmas. I was like eight years old at the time. What?

Yeah. You were smashing these, like toy bugs that you fill with gel and you smash them. Like, and then that was on today tonight as a hot toy. Yeah. And what was the issue with the bugs? Well, the IRS PCA was like, it's cruel. Cruel to bugs. Cruel to bugs for kids to be like smashing.

There was a shot of my brother, my sister and I just smashing these bugs. Fake bugs? Yeah, fake bugs. But it gets in kids' heads, you should be smashing bugs. But once you get a taste for it, it's like a shark with human blood. It's like the serial killer starting with pets. Yeah. It's a gateway to real bugs.

First bugs, then real bugs, then pets, then people. So this is all the response to Zach saying that potentially Channel 7 might not be looking for your... Yeah, and the second time they interviewed me on the street. Really? Yeah. On today, tonight again? Yeah. Wow.

You've been on today tonight twice. Actually, that was the current affair, so that's nine. So every network wants me, I guess. Wow. What were you on current affair for? They were talking about medical insurance or like Medicare and how it's so expensive. and I just moved from Brisbane to Melbourne. I don't know why I'm telling you this story.

It's great. And I was walking down Burke Street. And this reporter asked me my opinion on Medicare. And I was like, well, I think it's a joke that dental isn't subsidised. Why would the government have teeth? Like, teeth is, like, they're making it a class issue. Like, teeth is a class issue. Like, it's beyond.

Right on, Mr. Worldwide Mark. I didn't know Mr. Worldwide Mark was for the people, for the working men. Darlay. And, yeah, I just, well, yeah, I said that dental not being covered by Medicare as a joke and that ambulance insurance in Melbourne's weird, because we don't have that in Brisbane. So, you're going to pay for ambulance insurance. Yeah, anyway, that was the second time I was on primetime television and now I'll go into character. Well, they're going to call you up.

They're going to call you up and they say, hey, we saw you on a current affair and now we want you on. Probably have you been paying attention. Which is on Channel 10. You'd be great at that. That would be great. I famously can't pay attention, but I'd be good at the show. No, I don't think in the first 10 minutes of that that you've given any indication of that. Let's go back to porridge.

I feel like it had legs. Yeah, let's work through porridge. Let's work through porridge as a pitch because you've now, you've come back to it a few times. I was happy to let it go, but you're really insisting that porridge is good for the Auntie Donna podcast. No, I think I need to turn into it. I think I need to, I think I need to turn into it this moment, you know? So you'd like to turn into a little pile of porridge. As in like, literally, I'd like to turn in my seat around into this moment to figure out who this Mr. Worldwide Mark is.

Okay, so you're going to turn around. Me and Broden are going to fill. And then when Mr. Worldwide Mark returns, there'll be some clarity on the character. Hi, welcome back. Welcome. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the Auntie Donald podcast. Mark's dead in his place is Mr. Worldwide Mark.

Hi. Hi, Mr. Worldwide, Mark. How are you? Boys. Wow. Yeah, wow. Hi. It's a pleasure to be here tonight, today.

Yeah, wow. So far we know this is a southern character again. Sort of in that realm. Tell us, Mr. Worldwide, Mark, what do you like to do on a Saturday night? Well, the thing is, Zach, that I'd like to do in a number of things, sit under. bridges, rattle off riddles, and get in the way of people's thoroughfare onto the other side of the embankment, so that's a Monday. Well, excuse me, sorry, Mr. Well, Mark, you look like a cool dude, maybe from the Miami area,

but when you describe your activities, you sound like a goblin. Well, that's all a part of it Of being a goblin But it'll look like pit bull That's it I'm gonna, do you mind Braden if I'm gonna put this on? I hate this one Okay

Well, I was gonna join you as the character We're gonna see if they work as a double bill We're gonna have Mrs. Worldwide Mark coming on Soon, Zach, can I ask? Is this still a job interview? I didn't, and I just want to say I didn't know it was a job interview until we were already in a

I would be much better prepared. Ah, yeah, no, I didn't either. I was riffing. I'm going to turn around now. And when I come... I'm also going to... I know, I'm staying the same time. Well, you can change character as well.

No, no, I'll stay. It's a dog wheel. Zach, just be careful of your headphones. That's all I'll say. Yeah. So, Zach's turned... Zach is swiveling around to to become...

I don't even know what he's becoming, but he swoopled around to become a character, which is a conceit we haven't had for 400 plus episodes. Hi, who are you? Well, hi there. It's me. Oh, Mrs. Worldwide Mark. Okay, so we've got Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide Mark. Why, yes. This is my beautiful husband, Mr. Worldwide Marr. Don't look at her too long, but look at her. Look at her. Don't look at her too long. Oh, honey, you can look at me all you live. I just see two people dressed in a bald cap with aviators on. and you are Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide Mark.

Oh, honey, you're such a jealous type. You know I'm just playing. Yeah, I know. But you gave me so hot and heavy. I only got eyes for you, Mr. Worldwide, Mark. But let me tell you, this little piece of sugar ain't bad, too. Yeah. Okay.

Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide, Mark, thank you for being here. Yeah. Let's rank. You may have seen recently. J is doing a hottest Australian 100. Well, I'll tell you, when it gets hot, I make it a little bit of lemonade for all the boys. Yeah, she ties up her shirt nice and high,

just under her big tetties like that, showing off her navel and her big titties at the same time, which I love when she squeezes them lemons like that. You know, Mr. Worldwide Mark, he works so hard down that oil refinery, paying for our beautiful big house. Getting slicked up down there. in the dark.

Love that. He manages a team of hundreds. And then when he comes home, he just wants to have a nice glass lemonade with his wife, Mrs. Worldwide Marl. That's right. Nice, cool glass lemonade. You know how I like it.

But I guess it's what Australian songs are you voting for in that Triple J hottest 100 Australian songs? Oh, sure, yeah, sure. Yeah, no, please. I don't know a lot of... Yeah, well, yeah, who we got? We got, I love that.

Angels brought me here. Guy Sebastian. Oh, yeah. I love that song. I love, I love, uh, um, got to say, I love, uh, Nashville star. I didn't even know he was Australian. Keith, Keith Urban. Oh, I thought you're going to say Ed Shearing because we were so a fan of Ed Shearing, Nashville star, Ed Sheareran. Oh, we do like, we do like Ed Shearing. Um, we're just simple folk, though. We don't, you know, we don't listen to too much music. We just put on the radio, play what's playing. I'll make a glass

the lemonade for all the boys down the pool. And I ask a question to you both. Sure. What's with the bald caps and the sunglasses? Well, I let Mr. Wirwai take that one. Yeah, well, on account of the fact that I started up, before I was managing hundreds, I was down to mine myself. And this is before, you got to understand,

before we had canary birds doing all the squawking. So I was, basically, my hair was the original canary bird. So if I was down there for too long and too much hair fell out, Then we knew it was dangerous, I got to get out of there. And so that's how I lost my hair. But you're still some coming out of the back of your head. Well, that's right, because that's how stress out of the piece of works. So the carbon dioxide.

Oh, that carbon dioxide. It only takes it off the top. Yeah. And what's your story? Oh, I just wear a bald cap out of solidarity for my husband, Mr. Worldwide. Yeah. I've actually got a big blonde buffoon under here. Oh, sort of like a Dolly Parton situation.

Oh, sure. I love Dolly Parton. And I see in your eyes now you're imagining that, and I prefer you didn't do that for me. Oh, honey, you're so jealous. He's okay. Hey, why don't you come around to our pool party? I'll make you a big glass of lemonade.

Yeah, I don't like these people. Oh, sure, yeah. Well, we're a simple spin away from getting out of them. No, don't spin anywhere. Yeah, we can just slowly spin it. Anytime you want, Cowboys, we'd be anybody you need. Okay, go for a spin. Sure, here we go.

Any suggestions on who you are? No, I've got no suggestions. We've got the two performers here spinning around. Cords getting tangled up and broken into everything they're doing. And here they are. Hi, who are you? Well, hello there. I'm Mrs. Worldwide.

Oh. And this is my husband, Mr. Worldwide. Hello? It's me. Mr. Worldwide. Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide. Hello. Nice to meet you both.

It is marriage of convenience. It is marriage. It is marriage of convenience. Yeah. It's a marriage of convenience. But let me tell you, my mother didn't approve of me marrying an American. And a divorcee at that. Yeah, mom's a bitch.

You're still Southern. Emma. Hold on. Oh, no. It's like swiveling around. He's swiveling again. Okay, I've got it. I'm going to be

Wait Zach is choking himself on his cord This is This is exactly how I expected this to go Irish accent Are you right there Yeah All right there

Hello there How you're doing How are you? How are you? How are you? This is with the Worldwide Mr and Mrs. Worldwide I'm to Mr. Worldwide This time

And it's my Mrs. Worldwide At top of the morning to you How you doing there Broughton? Good thank you You're right there You're right there Do I get your fry up?

No, I'm going to get your fry up. We'd do some sausages, we'd do some potatoes, we'd do some beans, some toast. Fry it up, get that for you. You like that? Mr. Oh, sure, I'll take that. Can I say something? Your eyebrows, you're making it, you look quite angry, like.

Yeah, well, right there. You're right there. He does look like you're angry. You don't need to be angry. You know, what's got you like, so cross? Yeah, we're people. that could be angry. We could be an angry people. We've had hard times

and we are angry all the time. Why angry though? But also you're lucky. We're in the lucky country and you do your best. You do your best. You know? You make it work. I got a little, I pray to Lord Jesus but I don't follow the church anymore. Wow. Yeah, I don't

do the church anymore. No, you know, they let her stand. Which is that point of difference because I'm at the church. She's at the church every Sunday. And she says she goes, I'm going to the church. I say, I respect that, but I can't support him no more. And I say as you go like, it's fine. That's right there, you know? And I, you know, she'll go to London.

I say, I can't support that. And I say, I've got to. I'm a model for Rimmel. She's a model for Rimmel. You understand? Get the London look. She has that London look. She's got the London look.

And it's not until she speaks that you're real life. You understand she's got the London look. I got a wife. I got a most beautiful wife. You're so good at this. You're so good at this Irish accent. No, I'm using half years. Your like is great. I got the most beautiful wife.

And I just think she's gorgeous. And then someone comes from England and he goes, she's got the London look. I say, that's the worst thing you can have. I don't know if you're a Schlaas. It's a shame. London look. We hate London.

What is the London look? The Rimmel. Rimmel. What's Rimmel? Gath London look. It's like a little bit of a gap in the front teeth. It's the Rimmel London look. Yeah, it's like Kate Moss, but like a little bit like not so cute.

Not so much cocaine since. Yeah, Cape Moss. So he was from Rimmel and he said, that's the London look. And I say, that's a great shame to my family. That's why I've got to wear these glasses now because he doesn't have vision.

He went straight into the kitchen and forked out his eyes. It showed a farke in both of my eyes. You don't have thought. I couldn't have a missus that had the London look, you understand. They're not a good people, England. Right.

So he just got one. And she said, I can make it look more Irish. I can go more Irish. I said, is not you got a London look? Broden, you look confused. She goes to London twice a week. Does photoshoots for Rimmel because she got the London look.

And ankles are just easy for me. I just go one, two, three. Ancles that are easy for you. Angles, Broden. Okay, so Zach is spinning. There is a, we're saying goodbye to these characters. I think I turned and unplugged my headphones. Maybe a microphone?

Maybe I'm not. No, actually, not guilty, Your Honor. It was deathly Zach. Just, what the fuck is happening here? Well, I did... Okay, I'm back. Hi. You're back?

Hello? I can't hear. I can't hear. They're just checking. I'm sitting near the microphone. This is the problem with spinning in the fucking... These characters keep spinning the chair. I was going to say...

Oh, I can't hear through my headphones. I was going to say this is a good offer, the spinning. I don't like the spinning. You don't like the spinning? The problem with the spinning is... No, these two characters... Alex Hines... I can't hear.

And Zachrawe. By doing characters. Yeah. You keep spinning the chairs and it's literally fucking up things. Sorry, I got to spin though. Okay, can you guys, I can't hear anything through my headphone, so I'm to take them off. Yeah, okay. But I do think, and I'd hate to.

Hi, who are you people? Oh, God. Right, me just out there. These spinning characters, I don't know if I'm here for them. I don't, well, I'm traumatized. Hey there, California. Hello. Hello.

Oh, yeah. Mr. Worldwide. Wait, California. California. Hey, yeah. Okay. It's us, Mr. M.S. Worldwide.

Are you about to put some respect on our names? Because we're here. And that's Mr. We're in Mrs. Worldwide. Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide from America. Yeah. We're in California. From California.

We don't really identify as Americans. We identify as Colorado. California. You know, we got the, like, Yeah, you look at our GDP, it's like seventh of the world, even without the rest of America. Okay. I can hear through my headphones still.

Because you keep fucking spitting. It did actually happen before I spun. Get a little wiggle. What's this? Don't worry about the microphone. Okay, I thought that was a handshake. I thought we were doing a handshake, but you were just trying to say to wiggle my headphones.

She's so funny. Crazy like that. Wait till I go up. You know, I'm coming down right now. But when I go up, it's really crazy. Her dad, her dad owns all of California. Property developers. My dad doesn't.

My mom, though. She owns all of California. So your mom owns all of California. Your dad owns all of California. No, he develops it. His mom owns it. My dad develops it. And my mom owns all of the water like,

Reznik. Yeah, so my mom, she goes to her dad. I didn't even know they knew each other. We met in Caltech. We met in Caltechs, the petrol station. Yeah, we met in Caltech. The petrol, we were buying some petrol for our cars. Yeah. And I said, uh, I said, bitch, who are you? I was like there with the pump like glug, glug, glug, glug, glug. And I was like to my friend. I said to my boyfriend at the time. My favorite Mario car. I said to my boyfriend at the time I said, who the fuck is that bitch glugging over there? And I was like, clag, glug, glug, glug. I said, glug, bitch. What's your name? So you're at the bouncer and you've noticed

this person, you said, I don't care for him. No, no, I was like, this bitch. Yeah. I liked her a lot. Oh, I'm so sorry. I was like, who the fuck is this glug bitch? And like, can I just ask, like, Broden, who would you vote for in this

Australian hottest 100? Oh. Is this like the hot? Like, what's hot, what's not? So, like, Australia's doing this thing where they're like, remember how we have artists as well. And then, so they're like, so of our artist, who's their favorite. Who's hot, who's not? Who's hot, who's not.

I gotta go with, like, all the Hamsworths. Totally. And I got to go with. And the Baldwin brothers as well. Oh, I love the Baldwin. You've seen the Baldwin's. They're each more handsome than the last. I love when brothers get into it.

Have you seen the movie? the accountant. Stephen Baldwin underrated. Alec Baldwin underrated, unbelievably. I'll say something. I was watching Alec Baldwin's documentary, you know, the reality TV show. Sure, sure, sure.

This is like a hot take. I'm sorry if you're listening, Alec, he's a family friend. But like, I watch this show of this man in this apartment with like 24 kids. And I'm like, damn, this guy actually, he wants to go to prison. Oh, sure.

Like, he literally, like, I saw her in his eyes. He's like, I hope I'm guilty. Sorry, I blacked out for a minute. What were you talking about? What? There's all these old guys in Hollywood. They've all got, like, so my mom, she's, like, 20. Your mom's 20?

Yeah. It's like, 80. You got that? And I'm like, that's normal. Biohacking. And we're doing it over there. Oh, yeah, we are all biohacking. So she should be 60.

I'm 84. For example. Are you 84? Yeah. Technically. Like, road. Like biologically, I'm 84 and spiritually, I'm 1 million and 42. You understand?

We're not going to die. We're not going to die because we have blood. Broden fucking hates this. Like he's squirming and shit. Oh, no, they're swiveling again. They're swiveling again. And here they are. I'm going to say it.

It's me. I persisted past the spin because I'm that old spiritually. Broden, what would happen if you went for a spin? I think you should try it out. I think you should try a spin, Brodus. I'm going to spin, too. Who are you? My name is Mrs. Worldwide.

And this is my husband, Mr. Worldwide. Hello. Are she gone? Hello, Mr. Worldwide. Oh, hello, and it's pleasure to be here. Thank you so much, and I'm looking forward to this discourse. This is my beautiful husband. He's the most handsome man in all the land. And my wife?

a very talented neurosurgeon. Yes, I'm neurosurgeon. I learned how to be a neurosurgeon when I spent some time with the East Indies Company. Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide, thank you for being here. I discovered Polynesia.

Yes, and Polio. Yes, and Polio, oh, sad. You're a neurosurgeon who discovered Polynesia. And this is my husband. He says he keeps the hearth boiling and is a part of the house of lords. That's it, very much a house of lords kind of guy, me.

And, yes, while she's out discovering Polynesia and operating on brains, I like to keep her good home. Ha, ha, ha, ha, very good. Off to London, I go to say yes to this, no, to that must be jolly good friend of the house of lords. Not me, I'm just a simple lady of the house. Oh, and while she's a lady of the house, I'm with the lords. And Lord Voldemort's there. Lord Farkwood's there

Lord God and me That's the House of Lords That's the House of Lords There's four people at the House of Lords Lord Voldemort So you've got your Prime Minister Lord Voldemort from Harry Potter

Lord Farkod from Shrek Lord God Lord God Yeah Jesus Well that's technically three If you go with the Catholic tradition Holy Trinity And he does

And honestly Lord God's very proud of the work He did with the Catholic Church But there is a fourth And the fourth is me And your worldwide mark? Mr. Worldwide Mark. Lord, Mr. Worldwide Mark, in fact.

And I am lady, Mrs. Worldwide Mark. And you discovered Polynesia. I discovered Polynesia. What was it like to see those lands for the first time? Well, uh, we sent some, we sent some warning shots. Some kind people waved to us. We sent some warning shots at the children. And then they attacked us.

Yes. Friciously attacked our ship. Ah, you're sort of a Whilst being the wife of a lord You are also sort of a coloniser Yes, but she's not at home Didn't you get that from the East Indies company part Sorry, but the neurosurgeon element as well is

How do you work on these brands do you use What, what are you doing? Not of our robotics now A lot of robotic Yeah, there's a lot of remote control, robotics, pinhole surgery And what Lord, Lord Mark Lord Mr. Worldwide Mark and Mrs. Worldwide Mark.

Lady, Mrs. Worldwide Mark, I'll have you know. My marriage, my marriage. My marriage. I will say I came from good stock. I wouldn't see you marrying a middle-class woman. You wouldn't have had a chance if you didn't have from good stock. You wouldn't have had a chance if you didn't have from good stock. I was the most eligible lady of the West Coast of England.

We'll see. That's my girl. What year is it? What year is it? Now, right now. And you know what? I think there's a few Irish and English people listening to go, bloody right, they're still like this. You know, it's a bit of a comment.

Absolutely. You see? This is social commentary. You're commenting on yourself. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Satire and whatnot. I like to play cricket. But I don't like, do you know this fun fact about cricket?

Yes, go on the 90s. Up until the 1960s, there used to be a division between amateur and. And professional, you'd know this, bro. You're a sportsperson. Did you know this? Go on. There's amateur and professional. Professional was the lesser term

because professional meant you had to make a wage from your cricket. The amateurs were the more respectable cricketers because they were lords late, lords and whatnot that could afford to play cricket for free. And they were always the captains, but often the professionals were better so they would have like a proxy captain of the cricket team. And I'll say I was one of the captain.

of those teams. Yeah. Yikes. In a lady cricket team? How do you know that? I was reading about it once. Oh, right. You know, I'll just read sometimes.

Bragg. You read some. Sometimes I go, what's just cricket? You know, what does it go with that? And then I'll go down a little rabbit hole. Oh, oh no. Zach is swiveling. I can't.

Alex is swiveling. Because I stopped using headphones, I feel different. We're going to, we're meeting new characters. Hi, Worldwide Mark. Who are you? Oh, shit. She's spinning again. Hello.

Hi, who are you? I'm, I'm, I'm Mr. Worldwide Mark. And this is my wife, Mrs. Worldwide Mark. Hello, yes, I'm Mrs. Worldwide Mark. A voice so good it made Zach swiveled. No, that was your, that was my voice. What's happened? They're swiveling again.

Why are we so afraid to be ourselves, Zach? Wow, that's a great point. And that's the psych degree. Zach, Alex is swiveling again. Alex is swiveling again. The impulse would have been problematic. Oh, gee, Liz. Oh, wow.

Wow, we. Here he goes. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. We're both. We're Mr. Mr. and Mrs. Worldwide. We're twins and we're married. Yeah, but we're both a fanny little animal characters in an Australian kids cartoon.

That's right. We're married, but we're bilbies. Yeah. Oh, we're two bilbies. Mr. Worldwide Mark Bilbies. Yeah. Yeah. Wow.

We love Easter time. Do you know about the Easter bilby? Well, I know the Easter bunny. Well, yeah. But in Australia, we got the Easter Belby. That's right. You in our family, we go, we love to have the Easter bilby. But you've got a lot of homework to do this week.

That's right. Arismatic, spelling, handwriting, because I want to get my pen licence, and I've also got to paint all those eggs for Easter. And it's important to respect your parents. Yeah. Even if they yell at you, put you in your room and tell you, you can't come out.

You're like, please, Mom, I didn't do it, I didn't do it, I swear. And she's like, you know what, your little shit, you're staying in there. And I don't care if you scare the dark, you're not turning the light on, cut off the electricity of that room, and you'll be in the dark until I say come out. And then she forgets you there. Now, you need to understand my wife, Mrs. Bilby, Mrs. Bilby, Mrs. Mr. Worldwide Mark, the Bilby, she's had a tough childhood.

She's got a lot of trauma. What do you eat, bilbies? Ah, well, we. Well, one episode, we ate a little bit too much junk food at our friend's birthday, and it made us sick in our tummies, so now we like our vegetables. Yeah, and we respect the pyramid, don't we? Yeah, we respect the food pyramid. A little bit of treat, lots of veggies and meat.

And what's the biggest part of the pyramid? Well, let me tell you the song. Little bit of treat and lots of meat Little bit of treat Lots of meat Little bit of treat Lots of meat Them grain and rice

Don't forget to eat Little bit of veggies And a lot of meat And they've shriveled out The bilbies have left us And here we have the Potentially the last Potentially the last

the last, yes. Two, please. Oh, Lord. Oh, my Lord. I'm so tired. I'm so tired every day. I'm tired. Hi, I'm Broden.

Who are you both? Oh, Broden. Oh, Broden, Broden. Broden. Always talking. Talk, talk, talk, talk. Oh, Broden. Why don't you just tell us who you are for a change?

Oh, I'm Broden. I'm a performer guy from Melbourne. Oh, I love the theater. I go down. I go down to Broadway from time to time, watch the theatre. I love to dabble in Broadway. Oh, she's a beautiful singer, she is. And, Rodin, are you a multi-haffing it like all the others these days?

Oh, yeah, I sing, I dance, I act. Oh, fantastic. Zach swiveled. Zach has swiveled. Hi. Oh, hello there. Hello there, Broden. Oh, it's a New Zealander.

How are you, Braden? Wow, I'd love to join you on that, but... Oh, go on, you can have a go. Okay, I'll try. It's hard. I don't quite get it. Mr. Worldwide Mark Kiwi. Yes, Mr. Well, I'm Mrs. Worldwide Mark Kiwi.

And I'm Mr. Worldwide Kiwi. Yeah, good. Good. Yes, I mean, it's not going to sound good to our New Zealand listeners. Nor is the fact that I just got back from fucking a sheep. So that I say, Keora. That's what they say over there. That's the greeting.

And I guess we'll get up to saying the New Zealand people fuck sheep. I can't wait to go there a bit later this year And hi, who are these swiveled characters? Broden I'm just I got to reveal something to you Yeah, it's you It's like an Alex Hines, yeah

I think Let me just turn into it Because it's going to blow your mind Broden You didn't just meet dozens of people Which by the way felt like thousands Thousands of people, Brodyn. That was the whole time just two people with a very special career.

Actors. One I'll say has a career. One I'll say has a pipeline dream. Neither of us. I don't act that much. Broden, you just met two actors. What do you mean? Actor.

You're acting in a way? What do you mean? Trained actors. Actors can do anything. They can be anything. Go anywhere. And that's what we demonstrated for you today. How could I become an actor?

16th Street. You go to a school called 16th Street. Why don't you go ahead, look up Howard Fine Studios? Do a master class. Do a master's. Do a master's. Watch a master class. Ordered a master class.

How much training does it take to become an actor? Well, I did three years and it got me nowhere, so. I'd say just just try and get out just try and get out Got you nowhere I just met a lady from

England A man from Ireland You're right A lady from the A man from The southern states of America You're right Got you nowhere

I was teleported transported Thank you You're a star Alex Never forget it Like what you saw Was Chubbick

It was Strasbourg It was Morris It was And we're not talking about the sandwich meat, mate. It was Strasbourg. Yeah, the sandwich meat. The sandwich meat was actually named after one of the greatest acting teachers of all time. Well, Zach and Mark, thank you for coming on.

Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Did you learn about how fun acting can be, bro? Did you get what I'll bring to this podcast, just to be clear? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Got a pretty clear idea. I want to be invited back for what I brought.

Where you're sitting, Alex, you're like, holy shit, I brought on this fucked energy. What have I done? You have no idea how coded you are to what already this show is. Can I tell you something so spooky? You're more this show. I love it. That's why I love you guys. The three of us.

I love you guys. Can I tell you something spooky? You brought the swivel. You brought the swivel? That's a game changer. That's going to change the fucking game. We're going to get Real Mark back in and we're going to go, so we do this thing called a swivel. And you've got to put the fucking hat on.

And by the way, anyone's mic could come out at any time. Go on. You were going to tell us something, Alex. I was listening to your episode with Jude Pearl, The Mayor-Mare. The Mayor-Mare. Do you remember this? Genuinely, we recorded that in 2019. So that's like six years ago.

Yeah, okay, wow. But after I listened to the Mare-Mare episode, I saw a picture of a mare, like a horse, dressed as a mayor. Do you see what I mean? No, online. Separately to the episode. But do you see what I mean in that you're more this show than us? Does that story in itself?

Sorry. I just thought it was so spooky. No, I wanted to show it on air. That's crazy. I just want to say listeners call in now. Have you seen the mayor mayor? And if you've seen the mayor mayor and if you have evidence that the mayor was created after 2019, we will be suing them.

Yeah, I definitely think. Like a horse that's a mayor? And it was a mare, a horse's a mare. It's in the new Zootopia move. The Zootopias? I'm suing Disney. God, I don't have my phone on me. I would...

Look at a Zootopia 2 mayor. I would sue the Mayor, but he will never be able to deliver the papers because he'll be faster than any man. Well, what's his horse speed? If we go get... You know how they have to deliver papers in America? Oh, yeah.

We need to put our court paper man on top of a faster horse than the mare. Yeah, but you just need to get the mayor while he's behind the podium. Because horse, human, whatever. I think it's a male horse, so I don't actually think they're a mare. It's Mayor Wind Dancer. Well, it's a mare that's a horse, Broden. But the Mayor... Mayor Wind Dancer.

Yeah, I'm like, that's the hottest... That's clearly a pun. He is... I think it's... He is a horse. Well, I'd say she is just Butch and she's amazing. Yeah, she's a butch queen, Broden. Yeah.

And if you don't understand that... Anyway, Disney... Good to be here. Thanks for having me. Hey, thank you so much for coming on. Where can people follow you? On the street, in the car park. No, don't invite that. No, don't.

Please don't do that. I'm so scared of the dark already. And that has nothing to do with my mum. That's not a callback to... Anyway, I am online. Wow. Internet. So if you've got a computer at home and it's connected to the internet,

type in www. I'm no, don't go to my website. I haven't updated it in so long. Go on Instagram. It's simply Alex. Hines, H-I-N-E-S. Wow, easy. Yeah, I'm on TikTok,

but only when I'm really unwell. That's where the good shit is, to be honest. Mostly my story is. I can't be bothered posting. Are you candid artful imagery? Who's that? That's Alexhines.com. No, I lost my domain because...

I think it's Alex. Alex... Oh, this site can't be reached. No, try Alex. No, it's not.com.com. You, baby, I'm international. Go, Alex... dash hinds.com.

Okay, Brodyn's looking at my website. I'm embarrassed because I haven't updated it in so long. It's okay. What's on it? Does it say anything about my show that's... When is this coming out? Not secure. Fucking hell.

You know, I sent an email the other day straight to trash. And it was from Gmail to Gmail. I've got trash energy. Why is that saying that? Okay, Broden's just tried to look at my website and it's saying back to safety. I don't know. Damn. Don't worry about it.

Anyway, I guess go on Instagram. I've got a show in July, but this might come out after that. And I'd really love you to come. Please come to that. I need this. It's one night only and I need you to come. Alex, they'll be there. I hope so.

I gave my heart and soul today. I think it is coming out after that, but they'll be there. We'll see you soon, everyone. Bye. You've been listening to the. Auntie Donner Podcast. Thanks for joining us for another rip episode brought to you by Auntie Donner Club.com.

See you next week.