Aunty Donna Podcast - Our day with Bob Saget

Episode Date: January 11, 2022

This week we're taking a moment to remember our friend, Bob Saget.Join The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/auntydonnaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello everyone, it's Broding Kelly here. I'm recording from an echoey space on the fly, so excuse that. A bit of a different episode this week. We just run the office today, Monday the 10th of January. And that's an awful news through the wireless that a friend of ours, Bob Sagitt passed away. So we thought we'd just released this week, one of our episodes that we did with him a few years ago. I'm gonna say 2017 and tell you a little story. So we were at the time trying to do live shows in the US and trying to get into America and do,

and start doing shows over there. And when we put the show on sale, we had an audience that we're willing to come, but then also a lot of people didn't know who we are. And we were trying all these different ways to try and get people to come and see us or at least hear about us. And through a friend over there, we got word that Bob Sager was willing to come on to this podcast from these people who we had no idea who they were and help us promote our tour by just coming on and being funny and lovely. And we were all kind of shocked by that. This is an international comic superstar, famous in America, one of the biggest comic names

in America, really a household name. And he was willing to come and do our stupid podcast, just to help us out because he heard that there was some boys from Australia who needed some help. And we were very moved by that. And then when he came in, he was generous and funny and lovely. And we thought that was going to be the end of it, but it actually started a long-term support from him,

constantly sharing our tours, sharing his, you know, sharing us through him and his audience. You hear it a fair bit about him. He was genuinely one of the nicest guys. I think we've come across in what we do in the last 10 years. So we thought we'd put this on because he's a bit out of his depth as we try and do improv at him and he's it sort of showcases how generous a guy he was. So Thank you again Bob for coming on. We're going to miss you. And thanks for everything. And we hope you enjoy this week back to regular

programming next week. But thanks everyone. Enjoy the pod. Mark, what's up? How are you feeling? Good. We've got to pitch this movie, guys. I know. I know. And thankfully we've brought our friend along. Yeah. Bob, second, are you ready to pitch? Yeah. I know I know and thankfully we've brought our friend along. Yeah Bob second Are you ready to pitch? Yeah hell I'm the bitch of pitching you guys Who's our who we pitching to we're pitching to and a streaming service a Streaming service, but I don't know they would tell us but I don't I think I'm always pitching a movie too Strip because that means that so we make we make the movie and then it's just a streaming service No, no, no, no, no, pay for it. They go to pay for it, Bob. They have to spend money

So it's not we're not talking a big one like HBO streaming or I don't know that you don't care No, they haven't told my concern is it's it says on the thing that it's a soda stream service. Okay Well, we'll find it is the stream What if it's just a river? Yeah, well, we'll find it. What is this? The stream? What if it's just a river? Yeah. Well, we are out in the in the Hollywood wilderness. Well, it is scary up here. And the stream. Why do we do this at midnight? I don't know, but the Hollywood sign lights up and all that bum your own looks like a stream. You know, we could also, there are other ways to get it seen. Have you thought of View Master?

What's that? That's a little thing where you just click and you see another slide. I wanna put the movie on View Master. Or how about CD-ROM? Are you familiar? Yes, yes, Bob. Are you serious about CD-ROM?

Three by five floppy. I don't know who technology that well. We brought you in here as a big why are you yelling at me i want to help you take a pill we can all you all take a pill and it looks like you took a pill well thank you very much looks like a certain world leader i could think of that i hear is a dictator that are all but i won't say who it is it could be anybody

just in true time no he's calm he's a young no yeah he's on he only takes a positive to his now to humble yeah i don't i he's uh... fifty points on words with friends uh... what about what about you can you want to be the movie has to have a concept what what is the concept well that's a word are we about the pitch is moved right now this one told you for three weeks now We've been trying to get a movie pitch where he and those three week when they felt like a half hour to me

I just went by quick I apologize You're on a roll you're on a ride. I'm not it's Lexa Prok so I can focus We all let's just just let's just get one thing straight here, right? We're pitching a movie. Of course. We have a concept. You know the concept. Yes So it's my own private Idaho. It's just us out on the road and hit men pick us up in trucks and do stuff to our bodies. No, we never agreed to that.

But you and we do it real. We do it for real. And we don't film it. No, we don't film it. I think that's a good idea, because that's kind of an undressed rehearsal. Yeah, yeah, and we'll just figure it out. I say we sell it to Amazon,

not the not the service, but the river. The river. Yeah, and then back we're back to streaming. Then you're streaming on the Amazon river where people watch their babies and their buttholes and their dishes and their clothes. All in the same strength. It's beautiful. And predator is there. Yep. Let's now we've got the exec is about to walk in. The Amazon's never. Well why don't we, why don't we actually say Amazon maybe if it's Amazon with two clicks you could buy the lotion that you could masturbate with if the meeting doesn't go well. Which I need which you know every time a meeting doesn't go well I'm straight into the bar and get that one. It's a hard to do that not. It's just cut through a bust of

that. Right. Focus. If Amazon don't like it could we go to Hulu Not the streaming place. I think we should go to Uber Uber They're looking for 10 I saw an Uber stuck in his stream once and it was horrible the driver couldn't get out He really was just caught in a Netflix stream of fuller house They Netflixed into the fuller house into the river and And it's stream dream bred to his windshield And he's lucky to be alive fuller has a great shine. I think everyone should watch it

But not while you're driving and uber no, that's true and why do you sing the theme to the Jetsons at the end there? With now I want a girl named uber Sit ubu sit that's not, I said Uba. Normally, I don't know what you're talking about. Do they have lift? What? I think people are beating the hell out of each other. We just thought it would be fun.

We're not in, yeah, yeah. But I don't know if anyone would have been able to hear that through these microphones. Okay, you may come. No, I don't worry about it, but I'm scared about going in, but I'm ready to go in if you're ready Yeah, I'm ready to go in I feel really prepared Do you think we just walk into the room without really discussing what the show is?

Well, someone has to let us in yeah, that's right. Yeah, hello. Oh Hello, the big executive at um at the episode of the Commonwealth. Thank you so much quite large Is that a you move? Yeah, it's my big moomoo. You're about the size of 10 normal people stuck together. A very tall, very large boy. Are you on a balloon basket? You see him off the ground. I don't, yeah, I'm a bird.

You're not walking, your son is just floating. I'm floating around. Well, you know, ever since they brought me on to Amazon last year, I've been so excited to get some hot new tent into the river, so. Guys, guys, quick meeting, quick meeting between us. I'm gonna think this is an executive at all. I think it's 10 kids dressed up as a balloon basket.

Like a big bag of bones. Yeah. Guys, guys, that's the big bag of this. I'll be the judge of this. I'll be the judge of this. Sir, to prove you're not a bunch of kids in a balloon basket, Yeah, yeah I'll be the judge of this. I'll be the To prove you're not a bunch of kids in a balloon basket show me your penis No, what do you mean no? I'm not gonna do that. This is holy wait wait a second though I think in today's new culture. It's probably impolite to say show me your penis

I'm just gonna reach inside this basket polite to say show me your penis. I'm just gonna reach inside this basket here. Oh my god, that's a baby's arm. What do you have? What do you have in here? You've got hundreds of babies inside a giant balloon pants. No, that's not a baby's arm. That's my penis. Oh, he's got one of them hot new Hollywood baby arm penises. I've heard so much. So what do you date younger people? I mean, what answer? I'm a big fat Hollywood executive with the babies arm for a penis. I like your hustle. We're gonna pitch a show to you Yeah, okay. All right, you must be very successful. What's the last movie you've made? You must be very successful. What's the last movie you've made? The last movie on my it was it was three boys were in hats. Three boys were in hats. Sounds like the three amigas. Yes, but they were just normal hats. Were they

rising kids in a house in San Francisco? No, that would not do in that. They were the kids. Were they close? They were right, they were close. Okay, because what's inside of that basket is scaring me. Because that's really a basket and a basket. I mean, to have a baby's hand and arm as a penis. Yeah. How do you go to the bathroom out of that? How do I go to the bathroom?

That's a great question. I've really sent myself up with some difficult improv answers here. It's very simple. That's a great question. I've really sent myself up with some difficult improv answers here It's very simple. It comes out of the palm. Oh, I see like spider-man Understand my this out. Sorry when I said baby. I meant Toby Maguire my penis is Toby Maguire's oh I think we're sickness entirely to No, well, because that would be a very big penis. Yeah. Is your, how your penis connected to the film, Seabiscuit? It is.

My penis was once the arm of Toby McGuire and he was in Seabiscuit. Now, I read something in who weekly, confirm or deny. Are the fingers just for Ticklelin? Are the fingers out for Ticklelin and they're also way to close up if I don't want to do the spider-mean-wing. Like a Venus flytrap. Yeah, absolutely. Oh, scratch your own balls. Does it have a knuckle in it? And they're also a way to close up if I don't want to do the spider-meaning way. Like Venus flytrap. Absolutely. Oh, scratch your own balls.

Does it have a knuckle in it? A knuckle? Or an elbow? My balls, my shoulders. Like a shoulders for balls. This is not a good pitch. So let's get, yeah, it's not polite to ask your buyer. Yeah, I'm sorry, sir.

If we offended you, we want to be. Really, I bought Toby McGuire's arm to become my penis for the, it's a great conversation. But there's a newer Spider-Man. There's two new ones. And so the newest, have you watched the newer ones? I have, I mean, I didn't, I didn't have anything to do with it being the Amazon River, but I did watch it, yeah. It's so interesting that we're pitching up the Amazon River here. I'm extremely platformed. It's really, it's just streaming and you're not on a platform because you live on the river So you're floating above the ground. Yeah, which is is that helium? How do you stay high off the ground three four feet like that? Off the river. It's a little bit of helium.

Yeah, I buy my helium. Sorry. It could be a Harry Potter prisoner of ascaband situation where maybe you've said something about Harry Potter's mother. Maybe you called her a bitch. And then he's gotten so mad that he's then filled you with some sort of magical helium. Maybe he possibly take his wand

and wiggle it at your regular penis and then it became Tony McGuay Toby McGuayers arm Yeah, it was that Oh, it's that It's a forgotten, you know the pub Is it? How did you know?

Is it the first rule of improv a bitch? Yes, it is Yes, it is So it is Oh, it's so cut through So we have an idea for a movie for Antidana Yes, it's always. Oh, it's so cut through. So we have an idea for a movie for Antidona. It's great. And they're gonna sell it to you.

Yeah, so Bob's come along. He's a big fan of us. Have you heard of Antidona before? No, I've not, but I've heard of Bob's second. So great move to bring him into the pitch. Have you heard of Nurse Salty? I've heard of Nurse Salty. I love all nine of the Nurse Salty. We were the tenth Nurse Salty and then we changed our name. Very good.

But we're the biggest anti-donna. Okay. Bob said the same. Where are we? We are in a tent with a bunch of middle-aged women. Yes. And one man who's going through a transformation to become a woman. Okay, yeah. Because a transformation to become a woman,

because they want to become the best, strongest army of women ever to bring justice to the whole world. There's kind of the oceans' eight, but they're more like the Avengers. Yeah. So it's just, and that makes the Simpsons. Yes, and so it has animation in it. Okay, but it's not a cartoon. We know. We have very adamant that it's not a cartoon.

It would never be a cartoon. Unless you want it to be a cartoon, but we're gonna, we're standing on our ground that it's not a cartoon. Unless you want it. Unless you want it. We love cartoons here at Amazon Ritzker. It would be a cartoon.

We could have just the one transgender person be a cartoon. A cartoon? That way it maybe will be lower budget as the transformation takes place throughout the year because the movie is full-frontal nudity. Are you good with that? Yeah, I'm fine with that. When you say an army of women, that sounds like Amazon, Amazon Army and what about Amazon? Which is what we thought of that.

We were inspired of that because of your company the streaming company Literally streaming. It's the story. It's the story of a superhero One of these Amazon women is a superhero and she goes to earth All right, yeah, and and beats the shit out of all the Nazis and it's 1984 Oh, yeah, and so she's got a Georgia or wellie and field to her. Yes, and he lives inside of her. Yes Like in fact, she's a larger woman to the all the women live inside of her She's more of like a mortal engines type city on wheels. She's kind of like a beehive Yes, and all the women live inside the family. Well, she's not fat

It's okay. She's this bigger normal, normal, healthy size. Just giant. But giant and they are the best and they're very moral. And their goal is to stop all of the men and women who treat people badly and who hurt women on this planet. So they will go to a house where they see an altercation where maybe a man is not treating his wife properly

and they just beat the fuck out of him. Yeah, they kill him. They kill him. They kill one man accidentally. Yeah, that's right, that's an accident. But the animated transgender person is also a brilliant surgeon and brings him back to life. So he is so thankful that he was brought back to life

that he decides to leave his wife and falls in love with the transgender person who then we have a brief moment where the transgender person goes off and has the full surgery. And then they spend their lives together and they find true love. And this is animated. So it's all of what we've just said, but it's also just a sketch show.

Yeah, that's the most important thing is we know sketch. We've done our 10,000 hours. We know we love sketch, right? Oh yeah. The three-man characters, you know. Bob Sagitt. Bob Sagitt. Bob Sagitt.

I'm going to be in it. I spend the home movie eating at a mommy. Okay. It's crazy how much Edamame this man can eat. It's fucking unbelievable. You've never seen this before. People are gonna be like, people are gonna be like, I've never seen Bob Sagitt ate Edamame. Not much Edamame.

Well actually what's strange, what I should explain is, I don't understand the concept, my character of me as I'm playing myself. Yeah, he plays Becky Bob Sagitt. Because he's dead. Yeah. I'm deady Bob Saga. It's right. Yeah I'm dead. We're dead in the afterlife. Yes. Yes, and he's wacky Bob Saga and it's kind of wacky So that keeps gives the movie energy. Yeah, but I'm also cannibalistic but I don't know that I am

Actually at a mommy. I actually add my mommy At a mommy I actually add my mommy He's mommy Mommy's not the twist in the That's the twist Find out I'm a cannibal You look down there's all these These skins of at a mommy you've been We've been seeing them pans up

He's on no pans down his mom It's a mom It's got ten and a half months But she's not deceased yet And the transgender animated couple Yes Come and rescue her Yeah, and they're able to, such a great surgeon, the man that became a woman,

and it's probably the noblest of all the characters and shows up my mother. And we can actually get my mother who passed away three years ago to play the part. And then just move her head up and down and stuff like that Just like Christ now. I know you think I know you think it resurrecting her for the film But it's also but we're fox a pain for that Fox studios assigned a Fox a Fox a Fox studios It's just a Fox in the studio. They're signed on now. No, I quit here my question

Are you gonna be shooting on the Amazon River because we'd like to have a degree of oversight on this film. Yeah, it's all set on the water. Shoot me told it's down to be fuck. Well, for you, like, well, you shot here. Well, yeah, just we would love for you to shoot it here on the Amazon River just because we'd love some oversight because this sounds like a pretty cooked idea. No, no, no, listen, listen, I know, but here's the thing that grounds it, right? There's not one Bob Saga.itt this Tim. That's why it's called multiplicity to Bob's I get wacky Bob Sagitt wacky Bob Sagitt who's 10 of you. Yeah, it's 10 of me What's called multiplicity to that's a one and they all like this like this like this like this and they and they're always going

Hey Michelle. Hey Michelle. Hey Michelle. Hey Michelle. So every the we've only written about 10 pages Yeah, and then it's just you wrote extra 10 But I ran out of toilet paper. Yeah, it's all written lost 10 Listen, listen, I get needed to shit accidentally pooped on the script and but I tell you the last act will have it was amazing It was the best I had to flush it Act will have it was amazing. It was the best. I had to flush it Because it was a very I was so excited about the project. I crap my pants You know what you know what wacky Bob's second?

Well, you know what crazy puppy-bagging eat my mom I eat Bob's second Mommy to and mommy and then the two people that are animated the transgender That aren't me the two the females. Yeah, they become real they become Not animated anymore and I become animated. Oh yeah, and I become more than 10. I become a hundred That's what it's for some people either the biggest nightmare of all time A lot of Bob's sake. It's probably time or a lot of Bob's sake.

It's probably, it is a lot of Bob's sake. We're gonna, we're open with that. This is a lot of Bob's sake. If it's too many, we could kill some of them in the river. We could have them fall and die in the Amazon. Overbaptize them. I'm getting real, I'm getting real sort of like, sort of, I'm getting the vibes of the Michael Jordan

basketball, looney-tune-tune-tune. Yeah, absolutely. Get real space jam, it's Fist-Draldo, right? I had some space jam. I was at NASA and I was masturbating in a simulator. And I got some, oh, it's just GMI. Oh, was it a space simulator?

Was it a space simulator? Was it a masturbation simulator? It was a stimulator, I didn't know. A stimulator, I messed up. I got really excited. You get, when I get weightless I have to I think come out of me fluids. Yeah, but you know as NASA doesn't stand for national air and space Thing no, no natural anus

Shit all over. Yeah, that's how The sound is Where all the proceeds from this movie will go. We want to help Nassau. That's right. And men with testicular cancer, it's also for November. It's called November multiplicity, too. But it's pro-testicular cancer.

But it's pro-testicular cancer. So it's that. For the assholes. That should happen. And I want to get it. Yeah. We're trying. We're're kicking Bob and balls every day I and I go to a special doctor that in the movie

Injects my testicles with cancer and we're just hoping it take this is real we shot this last week I'm gonna say the movie already shot finished we got I was in the can when we were shooting We just ate we lost the third act. I go say this is probably one of the strongest pictures I've ever heard I'm gonna send it up the totem pole which is a literal totem pole over next to the river And I'm gonna find out from my boss and we're gonna I think we've got a real shot How much do you need for this film? Oh, well how much do you have? Yeah, what you got what you got baby we got 23 bucks bucks and I think we've got some quarters in that well if you come up with another I think we need a guys. I'm sorry to say this but I'm from LA and we have high standards and I'm thinking an extra million

Mm on top of those 23 dollars in a one million dollars You add one million and 23. Yeah, I don't want to put down the 23 that you have. I mean, I realize you live on the Amazon rivers are probably money as far as, but you must have due own property. I, I, I, I, I've got a little place up in the Hollywood Hills, but even though you're on the Amazon. Yeah, I just, you know, you bought it online.

But yeah, I was there in the summer, but I put a little place in the Hollywood Hills. My partner lives there. She just flies out when I'm working. Yeah. That's nice. And then the rest of the time you're in this balloon with Tommy McGuire for a penis. Yeah, it's just it's Amazon thing. Just so you know, we got a meeting with Netflix after this. Oh, no. Yeah, but that's the other thing is that when we're pitching up the Netflix, it's set in the net that gets flicked around a bit. Yeah, it's actually me. Yeah.

That's Bob Sagitt. In leggings and a onesie. And I'm in a net and everybody just comes over and flicks at me. Is this, can we have this in the movie if we should? Sure. You can come up with the million twenty three. $2,23 is a lot of money but even by L.A.

it's not for a movie but here on the Amazon aren't there people that can be sold that that that you could sell I mean you know there are some places that still buy people yeah the alligator people

but I'm not really I'm not really like a lot of people. I'm not really an Amazon person I'm a Hollywood person. I just have my little badge here on Amazon. We're a Might as a nice badge. We love this box. Beautiful. It's like a beautiful serving tray During the holidays. Yeah, it's a big badge Million 23 that's our final offer. All right And the other thing it's magic about it that we might be able to save money is it is only a two-act movie.

Yes, it is a third act, which means it doesn't get resolved, which leaves open the sequel. Where are you getting my borrow some money from my dad? I reckon I could get you $47. Who's your father? My dad is Jeff Bezos, the CEO of the real Amazon. That's your father? Yeah, and then I was sort of broke out of my own company called Amazon River.

It's Amazon River, it's a different thing. Where are you asked to leave because you look different than other people? Because my penis would talk much better. And you're levitating off the river. Yeah, and the basket. And put people off in the Amazon office, they're like, what is this giant temple

tole floating bag of balloons? Do you ever get out of this setup or this is it? I mean, do you change clothes? Yeah, like I got a couple of t-shirts. I got a couple of t-shirts. What about the bathroom? How do you go about that? With the arms?

Well, the arms quite long, so. No, I'm not, well, I didn't mean that? Um, with the, um, well the arm's quite long, so... No, I'm not, well I didn't mean that you're, you're Toby McGuire. I'm saying that. I meant you're, you're the number two. Bob, I'm number two. Oh, this is not smart. Be very careful. Oh, it's here. I'm here, man.

He doesn't like being asked about how he does a shit. Oh. Because he's got the Tobigwai McKean-us. He's probably calling him. I'm so sorry, your highness. Oh. Oh. The topic why I'm a machinist. We're probably calling him a machinist. I'm so sorry, your highness. Oh, no. You're a highness. He's a machinist.

He's a machinist. Careful. Bob. I will. I'll bring it up again. I'll take it. Would you like some modium? I have a whole box here.

Yeah, right. That'll close up your butt hole. So you won't maybe even have to poo anymore. Oh, this is good. I love it. Because we put a lot of that have to poo anymore. Oh, this is good. I love it. Yeah. Because we put a lot of that energy into our film. Yeah. Which you love. And we're off to Netflix in just minutes.

How much is Netflix gonna off eat your eggs? Well, we can't really. Well, I would say $2,000,000. $2,000,000,000. $2,000,000,000. $2,000,000,000. $2,000,000,000. $2,000,000,000.

$2,000,000. Yeah. That's how I'd money. That 24 dollars. Yeah, that's money. That would actually dollar we're gonna. Here's the thing, Amazon just bought the Lord of the Rings. Okay, the big Amazon. Is that real? And we want something that's gonna compete

with the Lord of the Rings television series. Oh, yeah. All right. We think that your large Amazon woman with 50 Amazon's living inside her idea of real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real, a long woman with 50 Amazon's living inside her idea of real or something. Really quick and paid, but we really need to get it in under $70. Well that's not enough money.

That's not even enough to buy the rings. No, no. You know, all right, well maybe this will sell it for you. You know the scene of multiplicity where Michael Keating is shaving his tongue, the dumb one is shaving his tongue. Yeah. That's this whole movie is just that shot on loop. I reckon I can come up that would be that would be a 90 minute piece of film

Of of maybe we could get Michael Keaton if we could pay him maybe 10 million maybe 10 million 10 million 10 million to get Michael Keaton shaving his tongue You're moving now 90 minutes 90 minutes and What do you need on top of the 10 million? $24 24 dollars a million 24 to shoot that movie take a cut of profits instead You could do the we could give you the back end. Yeah, yeah, oh don't bring that up. I forgot bring that up I forgot. Don't bring it back in. Oh, Bob!

Oh, no. When you want to move around, when you're, I'm changing the subject. I want to move around in, because I'm trying to sell. Yeah, and Bob, don't tell us what you're doing, you just do it. Oh, I see, okay, but I'm nervous about it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no from here to there because you're levitating over the river what would you do just just fart and then it could

you know I brought up his body oh he's getting mad he's turning all he's turning red he's turning into it all he exploded tomato he's a tomato juice man with an alligator swimming inside it. Hey guys, it's a BZAC. Oh, it's ZAC. I'm going with Amazon girl. Okay. This is Bob Sack.

Hey Bob, nice to meet you. Pleasure. Nice to meet you. This is Zack from Arne Donner. Bob Sack, it's just recently shot the film Benjamin. He's got a new stand up special command, 060. Now's probably a good time to. Yeah, we would like to make a movie. Well, it's about these women that are enabled.

We're pitching it to Zach. Yeah. Well, I don't need to, I'm still doing the voice. I don't need to have this pitch to me. I just, where's the CEO of Amazon River? Did he explode? Yeah, he's, yes. You see this little piece of red, that little piece of, of like a side of a raspberry that kind of was moldy?

Yeah, that's him. Let me just talk you through what's just happened. Is the man exploded? He had the, his penis was the arm of Toby McGuire. Yeah, make sure. He exploded and died in front of us. And you walked out of the bushes, popped to here,

and then Bob say, get immediately started pitching a show to you. None of this. Because I'm grieving so much over what happened He's my was my fault and I can't really take the blame because it'll be in all the press and I can't afford to have that kind of press That he blew up because I can't bringing up his anus and and his bowel movement and you can't do that No, so he exploded this toby McGuire still have an arm is there now three toby McGuire? I think I don't know. Oh my god. What over there? What is it? Hey Toby. Hey, you know, it's evidently is penis blew off and it's

Toby McGuire back in action. Well, they just came back. Hey guys, it's me Toby McGuire. Is that a good accent, Bob? I think it's fantastic. Thank you so much, Bob. What's going on? Ptspts. How long have you been a swim? Yeah, I look at me shooting webtsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptsptspts were an entire penis. I was in my Amazon streaming in the air. That's right. Balloon thing. And I was like, I need to do a trap. Were you trapped in some kind of other, did he like in prison? You was he like a, yeah. Kind of mystic. Big time. So you were attached by the feet. And he used you as a penis. How do you know all this dude? Well, he mentioned something,

surfer Toby McGuire. I mean, how did, were you used as a urination vessel? People would pee into me, people would pee onto me. Oh, I like this. What do you like? The accent, the character's good.

Well, what do you find a say, Broden? No, that's only I wouldn't do it. You're quite self-deprecating about you just saying quite surprised. Yeah, because you are so you say that you don't do good characters. I never said that. I never said that about myself. Listen to one of this is the hundreds podcast. This is your hundred. What did you do? Say this is your hundred five.

I think it is. I think this is our one hundredth podcast. And so so It's beautiful that you've done it with such respect You you you stayed in you stayed as Toby McGuire's Penis that became Toby McGuire. Yeah, not to have a guy screen is but he was a penis He was a penis and now he's back as he was back as surfer He was a penis. He was a penis. And now he's back as, he was back as surfer to McGuire, but for some reason, because of timing, the bottom just had to fall out of it so that we could get back to the reality

of what's happening, which is that you're 100th something like podcast. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's at 100th. Number one, and I'm honored to have been on it and asked by you guys. That's a pleasure. Because you're going to do something very great together. You're going to all get plenty of from asked by you guys because you're gonna do something very great together You're gonna all get Climidia from the same woman. Thank you, and it's all koala or koala koala have Climidia Two things koalas have two thumbs and Climidia with our four thumbs four thumbs all out when they had up

Two thumbs on each hand. Yeah, is that they have four they have four thumbs and imagine what you can do Imagine what you could do with that you could hitchhike Everywhere or you would never be short of a ride No, you wouldn't because what direction are you going and they're vicious aren't they? Oh, yeah the other koalas Yeah, I can't have sex with them. Well, it's that as a hat you can't has that ever stopped someone right? Is there any animal you think that people have not had sex with? Hmm. No.

Maybe in a kid now? Maybe in sex. In in sex. Yeah. But if you had a very, very tiny, tiny penis, you could have sex with a fly, for example. Well, what if you were to get a fly? Which is ironic, because you'd open your fly to get your penis in. To get the fly.

To have sex with. How are our mores? Oh, is this? What if you were to get you ironic because you'd open your flight and get your penis to fly to have more Oh, is this I'm Andrew gaff the The CEO of Channel 9. Oh, I feel like censorship is coming up. Uh-oh. No, not at all Bob Shaggart Listen, I'm Andrew gaff. How many battles have you been in? I've been in several battles across the hills of Malcalok. Right. The great Australian television channel wars.

Channel nine is still the one who's been, and I love your show, who, what animals haven't we had sex with? And I would love to fund it? You know my god not the show we were pitching no, but I used to do that back in the day on the video show I'd be honored so it would be we had you know in Australia we had Australia's funniest home videos and it was hosted by Shelley Kraft oh Beth Taylor go there they're great. And you were on too. Occasionally you would

be on late at night. Yes, they would run it. Yes. And then, but more people in Australia knew me from full house. Yes. And now fuller house. But back to what you were saying. Yes. I want to give you when you were in Gallipoli, what was it? Was it rough on the beaches? We dropped us there the British, and we lived there for years, trawling the Turkish hill. As you turned into Sean Connery. Yes, as I was taught, I turned into Sean Connery. I loved the hill, and then we walked home. Oh my God, look at that. Wow.

That's a very clean and A billion and $23. Yes! Yes! That's fantastic and we have Sean Connery in it now. Sean Connery's signed the retirement. I'm gonna play Gandalf because he was so upset that he turned down the role of Gandalf in the original Lord of the Rings. He's coming back to the end of the year.

Sean Connery? And Morpheus. Morpheus. He's actually at the age now. He's gonna be agent 140 yes, it's a no Seven is what I'd love to do for the show all right. Yes sir with network note I'm Andrew Gaff and I would love you with what's your name again? Andrew Gaff. It's a ninth time. You've said it

What's your name again? Andrew Gaff. That's the ninth time you've said it. Gaff? Well, but it's a joke for me and Tom, because he is an applying an A.F.L. for the West Coast Eagles. What? Anyway, it's just a little side joke. Is it a real person?

It's a football player in Australia, who nobody knows. Thank you. That's not the voice. But his name is Gaff. The voice of Peter Harley. Yes. And he's the CEO of Channel No. Yes, he's a midfielder. Anyway, I'm a gaff. That's a rough name. Andrew Gaff. It's almost like laugh, but a gaff is also a

nice thing. You hook something. Oh, yes. Anyway, I want I want it to be let's find animals to have sex with, but then occasionally, just go, now let's look at these funny home videos. And then we throw you Showing videos Are you dying? Before Let me get the fribrillator Peter Peter love me

Back as Peter huh. Yes hello, I'm Peter. Oh, no right Australian Back as Peter huh. Yes, hello. I'm Peter Right Australian I really want to apologize for my Toby McGuire the character wasn't very And I tried to do that shit. Oh, I'm really sorry. No, it was great. No, you were really good. Thanks Bob. No, you're wonderful Thanks Bob. It's like playing around and and and yet you believe in it. You had a character yet. No, I haven't. Do you want to we want to close it out on a character? Sure. What can you like tell us all about all your projects? Yeah. Some wacky Australian Tim. You're going to be Australian Tim? Yeah, you be Aussie Tim.

Hello. Oh, good. Australian Tim. And I have very, very, very tiny balls. They're like, tiny balls. Tiny balls was my name when I was doing musical theater in the puppet pedophiles show. The puppet pedophiles show show which was not a very popular

No, because a lot of people and rightly so yeah, well the puppeteers were put their pinkies in our butts in order to operate Your puppet I am and zero to 60s Bob Sagitts special that is on Amazon Prime, not the river. And it's also on iTunes, which is where I tune. And also Bob Saggett is on full a house because the house wasn't full enough. So Netflix, where you get an internet and flick it, is also how I keep my tiny balls in kind of like a hand-net in a restaurant that a woman would use if she had a tiny little head and would put a tiny little net on it I have that on my tiny little balls. I love Australian Tim. Yes, Australian Tim simply talking about Bob Sagitt's projects.

And he has a movie, he has a movie named Benjamin, which is very good about a little boy you think is addicted to crystal milk. And that really is the plot, really. That really is the plot of the movie. I think he's addicted to crystal milk. But the people around him might have more of a problem than him, but we don't know. That's very for fail Australian. It's incredibly, it's an accent I've worked on for many years.

And Bob Cratchett taught me how to do it. Oh, Cratchett from Cratchett. Cratchett is from a Christmas story. Yeah, Dickens. Christmas Carol by Dickens. And there's nothing like Dickens Which is what the Mary Annette operator used to put inside my tiny little bottle Look you'll look I'm dead

This is the only character Bob Sagittas And thank goodness for that Bob Sagitt. Thank you so much for coming on the podcast Bob Sagitt, thank you so much for coming on the podcast. It's my pleasure. I'm incredibly, extremely thankful. Thank you for having me. I look forward to seeing you guys just kick it. And you guys are awesome. You know why?

Because you cut through. We cut through. We've had an original concept, original name. And no one can take this one, except Uncle Frank. Except Uncle Frank, but I would like to see him and Auntie Donna do it. Maybe that's your opening act. That'd be so hot.

But, but, I, but there haven't had anything like you in comedy for a while. And because the other people were put to death for doing, because I love the baldness of what you do I enjoy it and I'm a bit body, but I just do it because it seems like the right thing to do at times

Because it's funny. I just think it doesn't matter and it can be completely clean also. I enjoy that also So it's interesting that you're so talented. You're you're really going to do really well once you get rid of all this shitty technological problems. You'll talk about this years from now and go remember when we were sitting in front of a Cinderblock wall in Burbank and it was a hundred outside and we had an iPhone. They don't even have iPhones now, because it's the year 2030. And it was like grappled to a chair, like you would, a prisoner, and a war camp.

And you guys went off and did all these great things. Just don't split up, and one of you think you're better than the others. You all knew who the best is. And you left seven years ago. Well, he's a barista, I believe. No, I'm sorry, he's a banister. He actually is as you walk up the steps,

he's just a solid piece of wood that holds up those steps. He's doing great. He's doing very well. Oh, that's crazy. I'm trying to leave him. Thank you, Bob. The testicles are so small.

Oh, we know. We know. They're very small test important. Thank you, Bob. The testicles are so small. We know. We know. Very small testicles. Thank you guys. And safe travels on all your touring. You're going to break a leg is a nice expression, actually. It came up, I believe, because John Mox Booth who shot Lincoln fell and broke his leg. That's it.

I was playing a play called Hand of God, which to London but didn't do that well because it wasn't Performed the same way as this amazing Broadway cast and they were a good cast I understand a really good cast but the play didn't transfer because it was took place in the South in in the US So during a Luther and I was a Lutheran pastor when I filled in in the play and and it was in the booth theater Which was named after in the play and it was in the booth theater which was named after Edward Booth who was the brother of John Wilkes Booth who was more of a frustrated actor, so frustrated that he shot Abraham Lincoln. I had a joke about it and it had fun.

I don't know which theater I don't know but I had a joke which was true and no one ever laughed at it and I think it's good to go out with one of those. Okay, my mother was born February 12th Abraham Lincoln's birthday and to celebrate my dad took her to a play in shot her in the head And so that never has it really ever gotten alive Because it's offensive Saying my dad murdered my mother and he didn't they loved each other and on that beautiful night Thank you, Paul. Thank you.

Safe travels and I will see you back home in the Aussie lab. Yeah, please take care. See you, Paul. See you in Oz.