Aunty Donna Podcast - Podcast Ep 145 - Gordon Ramsay's Podcast Nightmares

Episode Date: April 23, 2019

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This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit Planet Broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. And welcome to the Anti-Donna podcast, a weekly, I guess, a serial, high-zac. Hi, Broden. And we do funny little things, which is the podcast. We have sort of 80 listeners a week. Improvised, we do improvisation, but without any of the tools and structures that make improvisation flow. Yes, and a bull. Do you have any zany characters for this week?

I was thinking fluffy hair, boy. Yeah, sort of, I don't know if that's enough for a half of it, but we could start and then just see where it goes. Right, I'm Gordon Ramsay. Usually people get me to come in to fix their kitchens, but today I'm helping two fucking bastards fix their podcasts. This is podcast nightmares. Hello boys. Hello.

I'm Gordon Ramsay. Now, I've heard that your podcast is going downhill. Why are you fucking there? Why are you fucks doing wrong? Let's find out Okay, um, where's my first things first when I come into a podcast first thing I got to do usually where the problem is is Taste the food okay? We don't have any food. I would love to order the lobster roll I'll order the garlic prawns. Is this a fucking safer Okay, I will listen mr. Ramsey and I'll have a baked chicken

All right, I'm listening. This is a this is a comedy podcast We do characters. I can show you some of the characters We do characters I can show you some of the characters Let's talk her stuff see what's really going on inside Zach how long you've been working here for? Antidana or the podcast on to your Paddy How long you been working for Broden Well, I don't work for Broden, we sort of all, we're all in a share. Right, so we got a co-owner dealership going on.

What sort of thing do you do at A isn't doing? Well, where's the number one problem with the pub cars? Is it food? Is it kitchen? Is it produce fucking slack ass attitude? There I've known it was from the moment I walked you know He's not slack. He's we just do different things. He's sort of share responsibility Right, so I'm getting two different stories Brodans saying it's Zaxfoll Zax saying it's Brodans fault

Let's find out what the real problem is but talking to Tom Tom you know what's going on in the podcast better than anyone You want outside perspectives? What is the problem between Bogum and Swack um they both dogcants oh the chicken is bland we didn't give you any chicken and dry we didn't give you any chicken man oh have you seen these garlic prawns? It's raw! Oh, I heard from the show. It's raw!

I see that's the meaning What is that saying? Right, so if there's a problem with the food usually there's a problem with the kitchen Let's go in and talk to head chef Broden. If they even did that shit Broden why is going on in this kitchen? That food you serve. Alright why are you right for our 10? 1 to 10? Where do you see it Sitten and you've trained with Michelin Chef hats? Here's a thing, Zack's always talk, talk, talk, talk, and I'm making the kitchen. I've had had enough Right, so here's where the problem is Broden fig Zach has had enough and he's always talking But Zach's never in the kitchen doing his job. Let's find out from Zach exactly what he thinks of Broden Kelly

I you know I talk to him about maybe simplifying the menu, but he just doesn't listen to me You've stopped fucking care in I just I mean I talked to him about simplifying the menu but he just doesn't listen to me. You've stopped fucking carein'. I just, I mean I talked to him about simplifying the menu. No you're it fucking denial! The menu isn't the fucking problem you daft biscuit! Brodens the one who's clearly the biggest pretzel in this cog factory. We're gonna talk to Tom about what he thinks the problem with the menu really is. Er, too much seafood when we're in a desert.

Huh, the biggest question is, can I keep this up for another 20 minutes? Now, Broden. Yeah. Problem with the kitchen? You know that always means what? It means problem in the fridge. Let's check out your cool room I'm not the problem. You're the problem Gordon. I've been running this. I work my ass off every day

I work 12 hours shifts. What is that is there a lady to you here a lady occasionally whispering something? No, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about if you're bringing up again. I'm gonna rip out your fucking Jotula, can't Jesus Christ Now this is a fucking podcast. Why do you have raw product next to cook product in your cool room? You don't talk to me that way in my kitchen. I'm outta here. You're outta here? Yeah, that's it.

Fucking give up. You doth fucking cup of tea. You don't call me a doth cup of tea Gordon Ramsay. You, you're a asshole Let's find out with Zach if the problem with the podcast is this groups inability to plan anything or if they're just terrible fucking improvisers so Now that Brodyn's gone. I don't know what we're gonna do for opening night next week I mean I I've been taking the tips from all of the employees

and I've been collecting them for myself to save up for a new caravan. Mark, I'm back. I mean, Gordon, I'm back. I'm sorry that I apologize. I want to make this work. We want to make this work. But first, I've got to see what your dinner service is like. The number one problem with most podcasts is that they can't come together as a team during dinner service. There it is again. What? That lady saying... Damn it, dude.

No, it's just, it's Bacquill, it's just epic promo reality TV competition music by Pink Zebra. By Pink Zebra. On YouTube. Yes, on YouTube. Reality TV it's on YouTube reality TV show backwards I'm the chef of this podcast and I want to make it work all right So dinner service gets off to a rocky star. We got 30 guests in here. You just desperate for a podcast Can you just you know like chuck the money at this restaurant? No, yeah, no, no, I got to do that We do that around about 25 minute mark. Okay. Before that we got to do, we got to check it. Yeah, go to the dinner service.

How much we talking about, like, just, you know, I did just, sorry, before you came in, I did just say that I'm taking all of the staff's tips. You love that shit normally. Do you want to address that? Okay, yeah, let's go back and we, uh, go back that point. So I'm taking everybody's tips and I don't understand, I'm trying to... What the fuck is your problem? Well if those are your fucking tips, mate. Those tips belong to the staff. They're working their asses off.

No wonder Broden feels unappreciated. Every time he out in that restaurant, he's working off his little guts and he's got nothing in return They're not they're not delivering that's my problem But also the thing about Australia is we have a higher Minimum wage and hospitality the hospitality union Sort of made it so that everyone's paid quite well, so fair cop I can understand when I'm wrong I can address when I've made a blunder.

Zack, you keep those tips. You buy yourself that caravan. Your staff are dirty rotten bucket of oysters. We don't really have staff. We're sort of a, we're a group of people, comedy makers. Once again, there's no food. Food has been coming back at an exceptional rate during this podcast. Why are you doing about it?

Do you not have any fucking pride in your work anymore mate? Of course I have pride. They're fucking showing to me. I'm showing you. You lost your passion mate. I have not. You've lost your passion. You don't care anymore.

All you do is go around and yell at Americans and their hotels. That's not true, okay? Where you've lost the passion for finding come stains on mattresses. Hey, I've lost the passion. Was the last time you looked in a big jar of mayonnaise and said it's all moldy? A week ago. A week ago. Okay. That is that fairly recent? Yeah, I get, oh, burpees. Sorry, I got a bit of digestion problem. Like, from that fucking lobster roll! Tom, what is the number one problem with dinner service in this podcast? Er, there is none.

What? There is none. What you mean there is none? There's no dinner service in the world. You called me here for a restaurant. I'm not here because some blighter on the street brought me in your direction. You contacted me.

You said there was a problem with your family. And I'm here. I'm not fucking always more talk. Gordon, Gordon, sorry, we never called you in. This is, I mean, we've never called you in. Of Camilla, uninvited as someone that was not expected to walk in today But that's not gonna stop me from doing the best job I can Gordon listen, I understand I'm whatever you want Absolutely, let's chuck that money at the podcast I reckon I've got an idea

You two have lost a passion for your work. You don't want to be in a podcast anymore. We're brothers We used to be friends and now we hate each other from the business and also there is I didn't hear nothing What is she saying? Wait, can you just go back a little bit? I just want to hear what she's saying on This weird music or I'll play your game. I'll play your game. All right. It's so aggressive. I haven't heard one thing Oh fucking night all of her it is one and the wind Jim I'm sorry for the warning fucking Now you're making fun of my accent. That's racial racial

Gordon sorry, hello, why you miss it again? That was me a jungle audio jungle No, that's a little bit of promo for who we're still in the music promise. I was saying I know I wasn't saying it was me and I said all derves No good girl I say all derves no good all we're not doing all steovers. God didn't do you want to get back into it? What we're gonna say to us as brothers What I want to do is make you guys reignite your passion. Great. Realize that

you've actually lost your art. Sorry. Your art. Oh, okay. Yeah. It's business. Art. So I love painting. You love painting? No, your art. He's hard. I don't even say heart or art. I don't even say art. Ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. You're right, I've lost my passion. Listen, Gordon has a three Michelin star restaurant? Yes, because I've spent eight years next to you. So I've heard that,

ah, you know it, because you watch Gordon, you love Gordon. I'm sorry, it's Hot Ones. It's Hot Ones, your Hot Ones was very funny. Thank you very much. I love Hot Ones. You hate it. Ah, the Hot Ones was very funny. Thank you very much. I love hot one Oh, you hate it. Oh the hot one is very funny. It's the worst you can't eat spicy food No, I can't but that doesn't stop me from a little bit of chili to my famous Grisparic order is what is it that you want us to do? I want you boys to come with me on an overnight trip

To sunny Las Vegas. Great. Come on boys, you boys have lost the, you just need to connect with one another. Should we bring all the podcast equipment with us or do you want to leave it? Leave it! Forget about for one night in your life and let's go to Vegas to where they make all the best podcasts. But my concern is if we leave the podcast, the podcast will stop and then we'll just come back in

and it'll be over, like we would have just done it and it's a lot of good content. I think his film crew are gonna come? No, no, it's just gonna be us, we're just gonna go away for about five to, you know, like, you know, six, seven hour flight. And then... But don't you think it'll be a funny place for a podcast like Vegas?

No, no, no, you're missing the fucking point. Oh, I'm blind me bastard. Blimey bastard. What I'm saying. Nobody calls me a blind me bastard. I said I said I didn't say I said blind me Bastard. Oh, I'm so sorry I just heard what I got to get you to do is is is real high where the problem is and it's in your arm so you saying heart what are you saying heart right now yeah like Kevin ah yeah right go on go on let's find that passion. Okay. Yeah, let's bring it together. Yeah, I don't want fucking record it I guess no one can fucking don't give a fuck about that All right, it's about us. You stay so trim me. Yeah, you're eating every day

You like how do you eat beautiful food lovely? Gubbly? Okay? Here we are in sunny Las Vegas. Hey, but the podcast equipment's here. What? You said you didn't want any of that. It's your coincidence, mate. It's not my fault. I didn't ask for this. Right, that's the point.

Let's go play some cards. Wow, I thought I was so mad at Broden. I was so mad at Broden, but reconnecting with him, watching Cirque du Soleil, I thought I was so mad at Broden. I was so mad at Broden, but, you know, reconnecting with him, watching Cirque du Soleil, I realized that maybe we were stressing so much about work and stealing tips that we didn't focus on while it was most important, which was just hanging out.

It feels so good to be out of the kitchen for a night. I've been slavering away over that hot stove for years now, and to be here in Vegas with Gordon Ramsay and Zach, my brother has been great. Dude boys, oh, you're kissing. Well that's what I'm talking about. Find the nut passion. Make him out with your brother. Are you Jason Statham or Gordon Ramsay? I haven't figured it out. Do you boys want to catch a show while we're here?

Yeah, you're right. You're gonna chuck money at the podcast as well, aren't you? Yeah, some point. It's pretty spurious. Yeah, she got a show in Vegas. Seeing Britney reminded me of... I had so much fun. Can you not... Sorry. Britney stopped once.

Can you not talk to her and shut up? I'm just doing the interviews. Well, yeah we'll do talking ads after this is just us. No one's recording this. Okay, well Gordon's just there's a film crew here. There's a podcast equipment. Zach can't get past the fact that he thinks there's podcasts recording equipment here. But I know I'm fucking recording. He got to get his head in the game.

He got to watch his Britney Spears show without saying a fucking word before I cut his cock off. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft.

Pfft. Can't you see? I'm fucking there. I love Britney so much. She's talking. What? Shut the fuck up. I was just talking to my comrades about how much I'm enjoying so much. You're talking. What? Shut the fuck up. Hey, I was just talking to my comrades about how much I'm enjoying the show.

Talking about a show is fine. Hey. I love this part as well. Oh, what? Just pause Britney for a second. Britney, stop. Do you mind if we take a quick interval? Not at all.

Wow, that was a great interval? Not at all. Wow, that was a great interval for potentially ad space. Shall we go back to watching Britney or do you wanna go get married in Vegas or go back and fix our podcast restaurant? Let's go. That's a fucking sick idea for a business, but what? A podcast restaurant.

It's like I'm mad at me. I know. Sorry, I'm on restaurant. It's like a madly me. I'm on board. We're like brothers. No. So you go, it's like a B.M.B.L. restaurant or like hard rock cafe. N.B.L. Not N.B.L.

N.B.N. No, what's the American word? That's a fucking sick like the old restaurant. There was an NBA restaurant at Universal City Mall. The N.B.L. restaurant is the City Hall. The NBA All-Restorys. You know, Restorys. You're in Crown Casino. No, it's fine to me. Sorry, I'm so unbored with this.

Tom just coughed, and I don't want to get into it, but... What? Tom? We're going to need an apology. Oh my fucking god. Now we've found the real problem of the fucking podcast. Tom Armstrong, who has a very Chessy Coffright now and he better not make me sick has been coughing during our fucking Vegas trips Tom what is going on?

I'm just coming out of a 10 day sickness boys at a really nasty sinusitis at my grains and now it's sort of moved into me chest. I'm a lot better, but I've got an hasty cough. I think if I'm like by this, don't maybe don't cough it into the mic. By this point, I think the virus is gone. He can't get sick of him now. Oh, I got ill sick, but that was like five days ago. Right. Yeah. I hope not. Because I've got a go-go restaurant to run and a business to fix. Now comes the part where we completely revamp your podcast.

I just want to go back Gordon and say, how a podcast restaurant would work. Oh yeah, I do want to hear about that because it sounds like a darkened idea to me. Can I can say that? Because I think it's wonderful. So I think it would be like the NBA restaurant at Universal City Walk or Hard Rock Cafe or Planet Hollywood, but instead of merch, you might have like Karl Chandler's hat. Declan Faye.

Declan Faye, you might have like Joe Rogan's arm. Something from cereal. Something from you know the cereal by the way. Guys we fucked. A picture of the ladies from Guys, we fucked. And you, and like, there's big speakers everywhere. Right, where you can listen to your favorite podcast. Boys.

You get burgers and nachos. Well, the best thing for me is the burger. Best thing for me to do is taste the food. So, at this podcast restaurant run by Broden and Zach, I'm here to find out what the real problem is. Okay, Zach, I will have the double cheese burger without curly fries. I wouldn't recommend the curly fries. Really? What is that?

They're just like it's stale. Well, why the curly fries stale? Let's find out, but I go into the kitchen. Broden, why the curly fry stale? Let's find out but go into the kitchen Broden what the fuck is going on when your own staff ain't recommending the curly fry? Yeah, who fucking dropped you on the air as a little baby? Was it your mom? Was it your dad or was it your three star? But it was neither my mom or dead it was um you get racial

It was neither my mum or dead. It was um you get racial You get racial the reason the curly fries are stale Gordon It's because when they're fried I leave them out for a week. Are they frozen? Are you getting these boys in frozen? Yeah, I they're frozen and then once I've cooked them I leave them for a week before I give them to the customer. It's fucking raw leave them for a week before I give them to the customer. It's fucking raw! No, it's not raw. You've got a cook product next to raw product in your cool room. God, are you okay?

So we're going to remeber restaurant by changing all the decor. I know. That's a little bit just shit. Finally. But unfortunately, this is a podcast and it's not actually And they're not can change because it's sort of like an audio file. You would listen in your RSS feed Audio jungle now would you find do you find with all the American restaurants that Gordon Ramsay? I mean you goes to it Is how many fucking restaurants are tiled? You're a tiled floors? Gross. Or is easier to uh, easier to clean. I went to a restaurant in Seattle and um, all right,

Frazier. Or you fucking dumb Frazier can't. Or would you get scrambled eggs and salad that was tossed together with a little bit of balsamic vinegar. Yeah, idiot. Are you fucking idiot? tossed together with a little bit of balsamic vinegar. Yeah, idiot. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Are you fucking idiot?

You are fucking sea-at-all, seal, flopping around, taking fucking nothing but mung beans and tofu. And I got a ram-view, some things you can- You know, I got a ram-view, some things you can- Gordon, you- sometimes you can be a little mean. How many ads do I got on? What? How many ads do I got on?

Three, none. Three Michelin ads. Uh. How many ads do I got on? What? How many ads do I got on? Three...None. Three Michelin ads. Three, I'm wearing three fucking ads, you know what that means? What? More restaurants serve fucking things in very small portions. But you haven't been the head chef in a long time. Have you ever seen a main meal that cost $50 served this fucking tiny?

Well, I think you do Degas stations. What the fuck did you call me? What? What the fuck did you call me? I just think this attitude's a little much Army and a find out what's really going on with this podcast restaurant? I've talked into Broden Tom Tom Yeah I've talking to Broden Tom. Tom? Yeah. What's going on with the curly fries? I told you. They cook it. I live on the bench for a fact and week, alright?

Sorry. Oi. Sometimes it's a two-fold problem. No, I'm 100% responsible for the problem. Broden, Tom might have just a different perspective. Alright, right. I think you're in denial In some respects most like you better you better you better you're saying you're swimming to the shore

Yeah, you better swim to the shore you fucking dark. Well, you've been eating scramble eggs toss with a bit of salad Hey, now listen that's uncalled for I need an apology That's uncalled for I need an apology I'm Gordon fucking Ramsey only apologize to three people my mum Megabla and my lovely Jablie. I think that's a Jamie Oliver the Jablie stuff. No, okay So I've been stealing all the tips you've been stealing all the eggs know the tips What tips I've been stealing tips what better eggs are the eggs safe. I've been stealing eggs from this business I can't figure out what's worth but oh I'm not going to get a couple of bloody

Not going to get a curly mo curly mo bloody not going to get that you're not bloody get where they the Stooget I have a couple of stoooges here. I lost stooog number one they the stooget I have bloody cover stooges here I lost stoog number one bloody stooget number two I mean I've stoooged number three over here Tom curly Joe and Tom I'm a bang your bloody eds together You don't get your shit straight Now you are quite full on did you know that? Very disrespectful the way

But you get the job done I constantly have an ed ache you have no idea Um I love can I just say I love the new nautical theme you've given the whole place. Well that was the thing that we wanted to do. You should find a happy reality TV music now, you know, because the podcast is taking that turn bit, you know? Oh you mean the shows that I got into the point where it's like? Yeah, in the stand.

So look what I've done here I have turned your ram shackle in to something you can be proud of wow all right I've done you a new menu is this even my restaurant yeah I'm gonna give you a look at the wall try this mashroom try this try this mashbread. Wow, it's so fancy and difficult. This is a problem we'll never pull this off. That's fresh mushrooms there. This is incredible. Got on straight from the garden out of bag, right?

I want you to, yeah, you remember those curly fries? Yeah, I'll try this. Sweet potato, criss-cross fries, cooked fresh with a bit of salt and vinegar. Get that in your ghoubley. It's good. Yeah, isn't that better than any of that fucking filthy shit you were selling. Gordon, can I just say I'm a little bit worried that people come to us for a trashy big serve.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's like 20 restaurants on this street that do better quality food than us imitating what you've taught us. Yeah. So do you think maybe you're actually setting us up for failure right now? Absolutely not. This has a 29% non-closure rate. So over 70% of restaurants do close after our visit.

Right? But... Have the podcasts though. This is the first one, so we'll see. Mmm. But look at this beautiful new menu I've done. Now, I've written you a brand new menu of about 30, 40 dishes, and I expect you to learn all of those,

and cook all of those in an afternoon and serve them tonight. Okay, that is my gift to you. Look, I'm a changed man. At the start of this, I was aggressive, but now that this camera's here I'm no longer aggressive. Oh, why is old ghost me. I'm still stealing tips We never dealt with that of renamed your podcast restaurant now. I was gonna listen that I don't podcast But people will listen to the little dumb dumb club. That's right. You guys have now been renamed the little dumb dumb club I

Mean all right fucking go already trust me. I've been a podcast the tour for over 30 fucking years I'm wearing free hats There's some there's customers out the door already well let's check that dinner service. Oh, this is so hard I'm struggling with the new You're playing two things at once. Yes, because it's a fake Stressful stressful stressful stressful. Oh, come on. I'll have a We got all this pulling up. I'm starting to revert. I'm starting to revert to my old ways Don't refer you all ways come on your ways come on pull me out your back

Let's have a chat. Oh I'm stressed. I'm just worried about the mushroom crepes. Don't worry about a mushroom crepe Oh, I don't know. It's like no one's listening in the office I got broken back on track. It took a little bit, but he was up here on needing him to get up here Zack's out of front, serving customers, like a champ, he's being personable, he's being poor. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, me, they're saying, I serve, I wait, I was all right, but he did this fucking little laugh

and made my jolly's go all gubbly. Okay, I won't do it anymore. That lady loves her, craves her. I wanna play the ladies reviewing the food, can I do that? Yes, now, we've talked summer customers, summer ladies, lovely ladies, who were in here. Here's what I said when they first

is at the restaurant two weeks ago. Oh, it's cold and big. Here's what I said, I've been visiting the restaurant with a new Gordon Ramsay menu. Oh, we had the mushroom crab, and it was at the perfect size, and we had some of the sweet potato, crisp fries on the side, and it was just delicious.

There was a slight delay on the mushroom crab. Fucking wall. But once we got that, we were so happy. It was during the drama that you were dealing with that you dealt with. Oh, cool. That's a good thing to do though. You should be like, meanwhile, there's a table

that's been waiting 30 minutes, and then you have them like go where's our meal? Meanwhile, there's a table that's been waiting 30 minutes We've been waiting for so long Meal what's going on back there? I had to go back talk about and get him back together Get me the order. I'm so strict about it. We got piles. We are orders line and I got piles on the line. Zach, I'm gonna get you to start working behind the line. First time I got piles was in Edinburgh. Can I sell it up? A pile is another name for a hemorrhoid. Get out of

this. Brodan, I'm gonna come here. Can I help with the salad or anything? Yes, let's communicate well. I want to go back and talk about Brodan's hemorrho now Broden You mentioned you had emeroids when you were in our Edinburgh Edden bruh out of that effect your cooking ability. Why didn't want to move my ass so What hurt to move my ass? I didn't want to move you may move your ass like get up out of a chair But that's a move in your you don't actually move your ass. What I discovered with hemorrhoids is how much your asshole clenches in day to day life

when you sneeze, when you cough, when you lift up your body, you tense your core. Oh right, so. Every time you tense your core, that was pushing the muscles around the head. Yeah, so you mean the asshole, puckering up. Yeah, puckering up. Yeah, so when your asshole puckered, you were trying to avoid puckerin your asshole.

Did you experience any blood when wiping? No. Excuse me, we're still waiting up. Oh, fuck that mushroom. We gotta get that mushroom flatbread happening. And go to the door. Oh, is it, hang on, is it Craypa flatbread? It's a fucking look at the fucking

man. It's raw. Now we spoke to some of the customer, well what a six, all right, wait, what a second. That was the most successful dinner service I have ever seen. You can really pull it again. When our first came in here, you guys were so mad at one another. You could barely even look each other in the arm. Your improv skills were down.

You couldn't get... You weren't able to... You lost the last one, you weren't... You weren't... You weren't able to stick to one fucking idea for more than 10 minutes before judging it and then changing. And your beef burgers were raw on the inside. I learned that it's okay to steal tips in Australia. Well, that's not we haven't fully agreed on that. Well, that's what you

guys said to me. I think we might have actually. Yeah. Well, I've never worked in Hospo, but isn't it that like- You never working in Hospo? Isn't everyone chucked in tips and some restaurants spread them between all their waders, so it's only a big table. I've worked quite a bit in Hospo. Of course you have your own restaurants in Staten.

Yeah, no, I'm just Mark. I've worked. I've worked. I've been, what? I've been slacking off. Well, we just had Gordon on the help to help us, he made our podcast better. Really? We said that the restaurant crepes. Did he yell it? I've heard slacking off. Well, we just had Gordon on the help to, he made our podcast better. Really?

We said mushroom crepes. Did he yell? I've heard he's quite yelling. He's a bit rude. Like unnecessarily so sometimes. I think he plays to the camera's a little much. Yeah, right. Because if you've watched the first season of UK Kitchen Nightingale,

He's less yelling, yeah. It's much calmer. He just genuinely does that. You worked it. I'm curious about tips. Tips has worked differently in different places I've been at. The best way I've always found it, so one place I work,

which is shut down now, C and F bar on Chapel Street. Yeah, I saw that. Yeah, close down recently. That was the best tipping system I saw, which was you worked two shifts, you've ever worked breakfast lunch, or you've worked lunch dinner. And if you worked two shifts, you ever worked breakfast lunch or you worked lunch dinner and If you worked breakfast lunch at the end of your shift whoever was working all the tips got taken and we divided equally

amongst the weight stuff and the Perista or the bartender so and it was usually three or four people you'd usually walk away with 80 bucks in tips after a shift thank God because you only got paid $12 an hour. And other places it's personal. So if you get tipped, you keep the money. Yeah, which I don't think is like when you've got a solid minimum wage and you're not relying on the tip, I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing because you've done a good, particularly good job. Yeah, it's like if you want to make tips,

then you really put yourself out there and whatever you earn is yours. So give us a call. Have you worked in hospitality? Let us know. Well, there's one more. There's one more way. There's one place that I worked which was awful.

This was in Ballarat, the boat shed in Ballarat. Took everyone's tips and put it towards the end of year Christmas party dogs really rotten especially because I only worked there for a couple of months so I was getting paid very badly and then all my tips went towards I've heard of a few places where they take where they take the tips my fidget shop was like that Mark can you bring my Gordon and turn off your notification I'm so sorry, I got Facebook open. Yeah, just close.

What a fuck is going on here? I've been slacking off, I've got slacked on Yoko over here. We got Molly from a free stooge as over here. Gordon, Mark, as his laptop plugged in and he was, look, he had Facebook open. Is that a professional podcast? Mark is one of the artist's workers I've ever fucking seen in this podcast is the only one pulling his way if you slag him off Oh slag you off you daf bastard. Hello Gordon Ramsey. Oh

The fuck are you I'm your arch-nemesis my name is Jamie Oliver Oliver what is your name? What is your name? What is your name? Just, I'm the Naked Chiff. Oh no. I'm the Naked Chiff. Oh, I've got a fucking bone of pick with you.

What's that? What? I'm Jamie Oliver and I'm in. You want Mr. Cuff? Listen, I'm here to tell you one thing, mate. What? Young people need to be eating healthier. And that's what I'm dedicating my life to right

I'm gonna make sure lots of kids eat lots of fruit and visual. I If you're a bone pick with you. What's that mate? If you're naked shift I'll come over see your willy. Well, if you want to see more willy. Oh, yes, I do with ass mate. Here it is Oh, wow. What is this fucking hardcock? That is one of the hardest cocks I've ever seen. Well let me see your cock, got it Gordon Ramsay. All right. Yeah, look at this, Gordon Ramsay's cock. Oh hello there, that's me Ben Shurrie.

Oh Ben Shurrie, he's a guy who created Attica. One of the biggest restaurants in Australia, and what guess is that you know that because Zach doesn't stop talking about him. I've watched all those thefts table. Right. Sets table. I don't know who you are.

I'm a... You're fucking blip on my fucking radar. No, I think you would know who I am, Gordon. You'd be aware of me. I've got the 32nd best restaurant in the world. 32nd. And I'm the 5th of all worth. And I'm telling you, every kid needs to be eaten healthy.

Thanks so much for coming on here, Jamie, and talking to everyone. And thank you Gordon for the opportunity to have me on your podcast. You're welcome. This is Chef's Table Podcast, where we get go get a couple of crazy chefs talk about all the things that make us happy.

Food, family, lovely gubblies. Listen, I think it'd be a good idea to do this as sort of a two-be continued, and the three of us just have some conversations on the next podcast. Oh, love it. I have some reservations about that concept. I think your Jamie's very exciting.

Who knows? Can't wait to see more from him. Who knows if I can fucking, if this has any more legs, because I'm already sick of earing me, do this. I think if all three of us do it, the three most famous chefs in the world. I don't think many people know who you are.

I think they know who God ran through. I think they know who Jamie Oliver that they could chef his. But I don't think a lot of people know who bit the cheery. I've got no idea. Yeah, I had no fucking idea. I've got a restaurant just on the south-east and suburbs of Melbourne.

What just one? Yeah, that's right. It's quite good. It's a good restaurant. Can I show you in? I'm actually got one of the 30-second bus restaurants in the world. So you and me are probably better chefs than Jamie as I've heard. I'm in that. You got. We don't do hats, but I've got, well I do have three hats actually. You have three Michelin stars, you don't have hats. I've got them worse in this cabinet. Well those are three.

How do you explain all these at? Kips. Those are three kips. They're not kips. Those are three kips that you've bought from the shops. Yeah, but people came in the more restaurant, gave them to me. Yeah, but you've got three Michelin stars. It's a different system in the UK.

We get shifts at, heads in Australia. What you get? Where's not sunny in bloody England? Well, you get Michelin stars after the tyre. Anyway, thanks so much, Jamie, for coming. You're absolutely welcome. Absolutely pleasure, thanks for having me. Thank you so much, Gordon, for coming on. I absolutely love that. Nothing but I love talking about food,

life, health and the best way to look after your gut health. Thus has been the three most famous chefs in the world. Well, as a stretch. I'm Ben Shurrie. Ben Shurrie. Alright. Gordon, you'd know who I am. I'm Mark playing Gordon, and I don't know that. So Mark doesn't know who you are, but I think

I think Gordon would know who I was. I don't think so. He would read the top 50 best restaurant, he goes the white restaurant. Yeah, but he won't memorize the top 32. The fair chance, I think, that he would know who you are. He knows it like 10, he'd be fake. We've done the food community. Within the food community, I'm He knows it like 10, he'd be famous. With only for the food community.

With only for the food community, I'm probably in the top 10 most famous shifts in Australia. So it's from New Zealand, originally. Originally on Fugil. And in New Zealand, they call Woolworth Countdown. They do. So Jamie Oliver, God of Mersy, Binshury, the three most famous chefs in the world.

We'll be back next week. This has got to be real struggle for you. Yeah, it's not flippin' to English. It's a very hard accent to do at the best of times, particularly hard when you've got two people doing British. But so, next week, join me, Ben Shurrie, on the three most famous shifts podcast. Good night, Australia. Good night. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network.

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