Aunty Donna Podcast - Podcast Ep 178 - Pudmas Part 2 (Best of 2019)

Episode Date: December 9, 2019

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This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit Planet Broadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates. And welcome to the second week of Puttness. Yeah. Puttings stacked on the shelf, puttings, putting, putting, putting. Oh, you got some brandy cream with that? Ha, ha. You got some custard? Merry Puttness boys.

And I'm saying Puttnessus and Pudimus. I'm saying Pudimus now because it is religionless. It is... It is. Raceless. You can love Pud. Sure it has links to Christianity. Mm-hmm.

But that is only by tradition. And you can get a vegan Pud? You can be an atheist, you can be an agnostic, you can be a Jew, you can be a Muslim, you can be a Christian, you can be anything in the world and still celebrate puttumus. Yeah, and still enjoy your puttum. Everyone loves puttumus. Putt of course our video from last year that did pretty good on Facebook. We are celebrating puttumus or the month of puttumus over on social media every day we're posting about put counting down To put this I mean we're counting down our top 10 by you the fan the fan voted episodes

And you guys have done a great job so far the top the last three were fucking unbelievable unbelievable Fucking phenomenal man. Yeah, if you have a listen blew me away listen to 1098 now in go away. Yeah really fucking blew me away. Listen to 10, 9 and 8. Go away. Yeah fuck away. Go away. Skip back. Listen to that.

Have you listened to the last weeks yet? This is perfect listening for you and your fucked partner driving to a Christmas lunch. Yes. Driving. You can go. As you drive. Oh. Oh.

I remember. I remember, I remember that podcast. Now, number seven is a very special one. This one hacks back to an origin for all of us, something that we find very core funny. Ah. You know, sometimes we do podcasts and we go, I don't think people are gonna understand this. And we say, no, we can't think people are gonna understand this and we say no

We can't do that because we we are a premium podcast that I think puts out good content Yes, and we choose not to do them. This is one that we call Find very funny. I'm very intrigued. I really don't know I reckon I know take a guess Can I I don't want to guess because if I'm wrong? Why? whole thing Wow guys it's put miss It is put in the sorry Wow. Guys, it's Pudmas. It is Pudmas. Sorry, sometimes I forget that it's Pudmas.

And I understand that we are playing Christmas music on Pudmas. That is just a choice. They are not... Because Pudmas songs don't exist yet. If you want to make one... We should make a Pudmas album! Oh, that would be... That's... We should do a Pudmas album. Oh, he's so... We absolutely should mark.

Puttumus is not what happened there. It was slipping. It's been slipping for the whole podcast. I know, it's been slipping. You haven't said puttumus. No, I haven't said it in quite a while. Puttumus. What's number seven, Broden Callie?

This number seven episode voted by you, the fan, is called the tin roof. Oh, yes. I knew it. Without the light full guest, on a wolf. There was a pause there. Why? I was going to say, I like on a the wolf or something like that. On a the wolf. But then I was like to say, I like, on a The Wolf or something like that. On a The Wolf.

But then I was like, no, just say her name. Yeah, it's no your piece of shit about it. First time guest on a wolf, we all went to the same university. University of Belarus, Academy of New York, called Federation University. Oh, it's good. We still played off the three, that fucking cunt. Uh, where we just did a play.

We made up a play. We made up a play. We made up a play. Yeah, and we performed it. We just did it. We did every trope that we remember from school. University plays are a bit fucked because it's 20-year-olds. Trying to be older people really hard, you know, trying to be really groundbreaking with their acting. Acting schools are a bit fucked. And you go there every day you know, trying to be really groundbreaking with their acting. Acting schools are a bit fucked. And you go there every day and you're trying to be a great actor

and it's sometimes it's a bit weird. My favorite thing about acting school is you will know the three of us as goofballs, we're absolute goofballs, right? And we love to fuck around, we love to take the piss out of things. When you're at uni and when you're at acting school, you don't. When you're 20? When you're 20 and you're like, I want to be an actor, and all three of us,

all actually five of us here at this table, took acting... You should say as well that Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson are at this table as well. That's true, right, yeah, Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson here, and they both studied at the University of Belorat, Arts Academy. God, they love to have a drink at Heider afterwards, didn't they? Heider. Heider bar. Ah, heider. God. But we all took that school in those classes so fucking seriously.

Hi. And it's very funny to come out of it. I think one of the reasons we all connected was because there weren't many people that took it seriously but also saw how fucking stupid it was and how funny it was that we were taking it seriously. Like, we all cared but also thought it was dumb at the same time. And on a on a wolf and Patrick are two other two other people who if they were in our year levels They probably would have ended up in anti-donna because they have that same

Understanding where they're really good actors. They're incredible performers, but they also see how fucking dumb that shit They are just for clarity. They are two halves of a comedy group called the hot department And that previously or at they are a part of the very good looking initiative production company but the Hot Department comedy group you should check them out if you liked this podcast it's very much what they do. Yes. Here it is the Tin Roof Shed. I remember the Tin roof shed. It was just for the left of the back. I remember the tin roof shed when I first came. I remember the tin roof shed.

I walked to the tin roof. It's my favorite thing. I've ever been. And when I was a see what was on it, looking at the window, three men standing on top of a tin roof. Anything to me. Who are these men? Dad, get out of here. You're Daniel. It's time to get up. Who are these men? You're gonna be late. And where did he come from?

Get out of here, boy. Good morning. Is this the new restaurant? You've got a good attitude if you think this new restaurant will be open by now. I'm a young guy from in the city, moved out here, excited to start a new job. Where do I put my bag? We don't have places for bags around here, city boy with these expectations. Yo, Marjorie, what do we think we're going to do with this boy here?

David, who's that? Marjorie was a tall slender woman with fingernails as long as the eye could see. She'd seen a few things back in her day, but now was worn by the times. Ha, I remember Marjorie. Oh, hello, cities, liquor. What are you doing here with your clean shoes in your top-shaped head, your piece of pig? Get in here and I'll give you a tiny dinkle.

That's what we call sandwich. Marjorie, you always know how to make the city slickers feel welcome. Here, give us a high five. It was an exchange of culture, an exchange of ideals, a wordless interface moving through space like the very moment that we met. In that moment it was not a high five but two people entwined. Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher. Mr. Fisher. Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr.

Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher, Mr. Fisher. There's boys there on the river, they've lost their bikes! I can smell your cunt! I can smell your cunt! Mr Fischer, I want to suck your cock! I want to suck your cock, Mr Fischer! Fadre, go to the doctor's, I've got gonorrhea. Ah, this small country town, something very exciting and different from Russia where I come from. These people at first were not welcoming, but they soon understood that their love of beer was like my love of vodka. Their love of sausages was like my love of Krensky's sausage.

I'm a Russian, man! But I am also an Australian, and I soon realized that. Ah! L'I'AM to life! How are we today? Oh, hey there, Russian boy! Why don't you come in here? I'll give you a smack. Nity you do not understand I wait for my Russian wife to come to Australia from Russia That is if she wasn't killed in the explosion at Chernobyl Petrov

Grab me. I am caught in the Chernobyl fire the memories of my wife come to me Fires of Chernobyl fire! The memories of my wife come to me. The fires of Chernobyl. Oh, Pedro! Help! Oh, my tiny finger! It's caught on the winkle! No Russian words! So hard to explain!

I could not be further from Chernobyl, but right now the burning fires. The cries of my wife. Pedro! Petro! Petro! It is not my wife, but rather Marjorie. Hello Marjorie. Why don't you come here and I'll give you a smack.

I can smell your cunt from here. Hot pies! Chips and sauce! Hot pies! Chips and sauce! Hey, you selling pies chips and sauce? Hey mate, yes. I'm selling hot pies chips and sauce. It's, yes. I'm Salon hot pies chips and sauce. It's a bloody bugger out here trying to make a living, make your way, especially with my dead wife down at the docks. She's dead.

Solder for 10 pies and a chip. Well I'll have a pies chips and sauce please. Hot pies chips and sauce. I'd played footies since I was a young boy. Rough and tumble. Getting my knees dirty was my favorite thing to do. I jump on the back of the old utility car and drive in a town. The boys would be there.

Old rough and gango. They were the coolest kids I'd ever met. Barry, Barry, come, we need someone to play full forward. I'll play full forward tonight, but only if you fill in next week. Of course I'll fill in, but there's something else I wouldn't mind filling in. We were both sexually ambiguous. Because it was a country town, and we're all struggling with that. The crow's symbolized freedom.

Gah! The pigeon symbolized. Gah! Gah! Gah! Gah! Gah! Gah!

Gah! My pie! Chips and sauce. Hot pies! Chips and sauce! I've got your chickens! It's gold chicken! It was a market.

Gah! Gah! Gah! Gah! Gah! It's gold chicken. It was a market It was a Fresh ice cream fresh ice cream made from real cream come get them down to the old pickle house The market reminded me of home Pedro help I am dying the Chernobyl fire was burning bright in my mind No, my little baby

Also died in Chernobyl. This is a bit full of now I don't know if I should be here at the disco... Oh, theater black, saying just black clothing, track suit pants for the boys, a long dress, a long dress, always. Black teas for everyone. And I remember,

sort of little, little hard shoes. I remember David Vatucio's played the, the, the mirror ball, just with his body. He managed to do this body and a broomstick and a stick of cheese.

That was wild. That was wild. What he did with that cheese, it shocked me. And I was a first year student. I was new to the drama school. So seeing the second and third years create this beautiful image, a disco scene using David Vittusius, a block of cheese, jewels, voice, voice, voice, body, architecture. Yeah, architecture and body.

Light and shade. My dad, and this is a true story, I remember my tear up, um, my dad came and saw us do a, a re-imagining of a, of a Dickens play, and um, he said, I loved that you got real horses

in your play today. Wow. Wow. And he said, Dad, there was no real horses. That was amazing. That was a linear third of us. Two women in character skirts being lifted up. Wow.

And he saw the horses that they would put on. He literally saw a horse. Two horses. Wow. Do you know my favorite time is the tech? Because in that moment, the tech rehearsal, the tech rehearsal, when you sound, lighting in the people on stage,

getting that all organized, yeah. You forget about the world, and it's just the cast, the crew, and the lady yelling at you. And you just become one with the theater, yes. Do you know what I mean? You know what, you know, it's my become one with the theatre. Yes, you know what I mean when I do that? You know what's my favourite moment in the tech? Looking out the lights down on you and seeing the dust in the air and that lady yelling

at you. Yes, lady, my favourite memories of doing tech is just looking over into the corner and seeing someone like a Liam Mudge playing games on his computer rather than doing the work that was required of him. Actually, I had a similar arm corner experience. It was on the stage. It's at university. At university. You had a similar, I had a similar arm corner experience. It was on stage. It's an university. At university.

You had a corner experience. I did. That's amazing. I thought I was the only one. Yeah, no, no, no. I've definitely, I've had a, I've had a, I've had a, because of the darkest places. So, yeah, you don't, you don't.

Yeah, you don't. It's where you find who you really are. Exactly. And there was a mirror in the corner, actually. Oh, wow. Yeah, so I turned to the mirror. And I saw this goblin screaming at me. This goblin screaming at my face saying, get out, get out. You don't need to be here anymore.

You have graduated drama school. And it was a young lady yelling at me? Her name was Cassandra Finkel. Yeah, wow. The famous Cassandra Finkel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She said, you are going to perform with my theater company right now. But was it your reflection? Was that you? No, was it a mirror? What was it?

It was Cassandra Finkel. Wow. It was Cassandra. No, listen. No, it's like that. Listen between the letters. Listen. No, listen. It's like that. Listen between the letters. Listen.

Peace. Finkle. Should we jump back into the hot pies? I just want to say another very quick memory of university. Yeah, okay. You jumped in, but I wasn't ready. Yeah, I've got that.

Sorry. You got to jump in though. Yeah, yeah, but I wasn't ready. Yeah, see, it's just like you got to, like it's my chance now to speak. I remember being in 30 in uni. Stronger at drama school and racking up a hextet. And I remember looking out at my ensemble, which is what we call your class mates at drama school.

Because drama school, unlike law or medicine, is very important. And I looked at my ensemble and I said I looked at them all and said you're all going to be stars. Every one of you is talented, bold and I can't wait to see where you go. I was looking I looked at one person I saw Cape Lenship. Yeah. What Cape Lenship was in your ensemble? No, I was looking. The next Cape Landship. The next Cape Landship. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was looking at the mom's strong. Not everyone is an actor in that ensemble. So you might look out and you go, okay, not everyone here is a Cape Landship, but there's a few Simon stones. Yeah. There's a couple of Andrew Uptons. There's a couple of people who will probably work in retail. It's just a couple Yeah, but that's why they're learning learning about

Characters and people and people one time this is another true story a bunch of people needed to learn what poor people were like So a group of ensemble went down to Centrelink So a group of ensemble went down to Centrelink, sat there and watched the people come through. This is true. You're not me. A group of people from my university days, they watched the people come in and get their Centrelink. And then I'm representative from Centrelink came up to them and said, please leave your being disrespectful.

Absolutely. But what that person from Centrelink doesn't understand is the world is a state. Anything can be a state. Entrances, exits, people. Audience can't be. Stages. Well, unless... Oh, no, I've actually seen some shows where I'm sitting in the audience. They actually get some audience onto the stage as well. What?

So I'm actually looking at the audience looking at the way they're doing. Are you talking about theatre? Talking about theatre in the reverse. I'm talking about theatre in the reverse. I'm talking about theatre in the reverse. I'm talking about theatre in the reverse. I saw an excellent piece of theatre in the Traverse once and a man on the opposite side was so fascinating because I could see the play but I could see the audience across from me and a man in the other side of the audience had a heart attack and the player to stop and the actors went,

this man, this is a true story, I was on a date, this man is having a heart attack and they removed him from the theater and then the players continued to play, like nothing. The show must go on. The show must go on. And I don't know to this day whether that man lived or died

and that's theater and you see enough theater you're going I've also experienced someone having to be taken out yeah it's theater on theater I've actually like where is the show where is it where does it end when did what is it begin I had a man follow me out of the theater yelling at me. He tried to get to my car. Oh my God. And I drove home. Yeah, wow. And he was there.

Really? And he performed, I screamed at him and he said, wait, listen. Wow, right. Anything can be a stage. Wow. And he performed the most beautiful hamlet. Wow. I have seen to this day and that man had a heart attack.

Wow. So he followed you home and performed hamlet at you. That's theatre. And that's when she realised that's theatre. That's theatre. Can I rewind here? Can I rewind here? It's worried for a second man.

Can I rewind? I just want to talk about those students that were kicked out, that were just kicked out of the Centrelink. So funny because it's a true story. Yeah, absolutely. And it's so funny that that Centrelink, that Centrelink person came up to them and kicked them out because you're saying, you're not doing anything useful.

I'm sorry, but those students right there, they were a window. Exactly. And they were going to bring their experiences, and they were going to expose a broad theater-going audience to the struggles of the working or lower class. And a window is a stage. And that's really important, you know, because that's where the conversation that's right. If the window has a window sill that's big enough to support an ensemble of 10 to 20 people, then that window was a stage. Yeah, so I didn't mean a literal window mark. I actually meant a window into a conversation.

Yeah, right. It's separate. No, I got that. I'm saying separate point. Yeah, if there was a window. I just wish got that I'm saying separate point. Yeah, if there was a window I just wish you'd let me finish my point before you start talking about window This is my favorite thing about theater the the the rough and well, we're just this a grind. This is not a fight This is just a we're just having a healthy discussion about how Zach's spoke about how I said a window is a stage Yeah, if the sill is sort of the size of a stage. Like a black box.

And that's a great point, Mark. But the point I'm making is that, you know, where does change happen? It happens in the lobby. I'll be after a show. Yeah, which would be through the window if that window was a door to the lobby. I just want to talk for a moment.

Does that make sense? We're saying the same thing. Not just in a different way. No, saying the same thing just in a different way. And that's that beauty about theater is that it can be interpreted. One person can see a Shakespeare. Okay. And laugh. Okay. Another person can see the same Shakespeare and cry. Now explain that to me. There it was. Wow. So fun. No, not put, not put in a seat. But funny. Provocative.

Put, put, put, Productive. Productive. Product, Productive. Productive. Productive. Product,

Productive. Product, Productive. Productive. Productive. Productive. Productive. Productive. Productive. Wow. productive productive. Love. Put Wow Wow everyone at the table

Wow, we except for you hmm you Interesting I think there'd be people that don't like put I love it I would I would say the only people who don't like put the only people would struggle with put a probably people with tummy issues Some people don't like dried fruit, you know. Some people don't, it's got a... Is there one I'll realize? I'll realize. We're gonna get in a provocateur.

Someone who doesn't like... Put the Christopher Hitchens of our generation. It is sampling them, Sam. What do you think of put? I don't really like put. Why? Why? I'm not really a fan of dried fruit. I don't think you've had a good put.? I'm not really a fan of dried fruit. I don't think you've had a good Pood.

No, he's not a fan of dried fruit. I resent that. You can, hey, I resent that notion. Why? Why? Because the Poods that I've had in my life have been made by either my life partner Rosie and her mother. Uh-huh. Or my grandma. Right, so that doesn't, so that doesn't automatically mean that you've had a good Pood.

It absolutely does. So my whole life I'd only had curries made by my mom, and they were shit curries. Okay, so grandma and her friends used to sell puts. That was their fundraising for the hall. They would make them all December. They would sell them all over Victoria. They stopped because there was too many orders. I were too good at making put.

I don't want to upset you here. That was Sam Lingham there saying that three of the most important women in his life make dog shit poods. So, but also you don't like pizza. I love pizza. You know like pizza. You said you don't care for pizza.

I'm not a pizza fanatic, but I love pizza. That know like pizza. You said you don't care for pizza. I'm not a pizza fanatic, but I love pizza. That is insulting to me. Pizza is unquestionably. I think my favorite food. Well, let's not go crazy. I think food. I think food is crazy. I think food is put.

You just said like hot fruit full stock. He doesn't like hot fruit full stock. Sam, you don't like hot fruit, you don't have a peach pie. I don't like a peach pie. You've never had a cherry pie. You've never had a cherry pie. You've never had a tart apple pie. This last is sharp cheddar cheese on the top. I am. What?

Yeah, that's an imagined. I can't imagine. I want to like, I can't, I get it that you don't like dried fruit. And it makes sense that then you wouldn't like food. No, pull, got dry fruit. That's all I'm going to say. Well, most food has dried fruit. Most, most, you have to dry out like food. No, put got dry fruit. That's all I'm gonna say. Most food has dried fruit. Most, most. You have to dry out a put. That's the part of the process. But then you put it out. You literally

don't look. I don't really like put. So I agree with you here. All I'm saying is that maybe you just haven't had a good put. That's all I'm trying to say. I am not a fan of put. That's sort of preferences of that. What's number six, bro? Number six is a funny episode. Sometimes, well, that we try for that. There's a spectrum of, that's our goal. If it's not a funny episode, then what the fuck are we doing?

Is this, all right. All right. You were saying this puts on the spectrum. The spectrum here? Yeah. Um, that I'm talking about here. Where, of preparation for our podcast. Oh right, a lot. Sometimes we might bring in a character. Sometimes we bring in nothing.

This is one of those episodes where, and you'll probably hear it in the playback of this, where we came in with some dog shit idea. Probably similar to the Pudz that Sam's loved ones make. And, and, and you can hear us going, oh no, we don't have enough here for a whole episode. Sometimes we'll be doing a bit and then we'll ask Tom how much time's left and he'll say something like 30 minutes and we'll go, oh no.

Now what happened here is all of us at one exact moment decided to go with something because what was going on before it was not working. Yeah. Tom coughed and we decided to make 25 minutes about tom apologizing for coughing. This is a good one. This is very fun. What was the idea?

I don't remember. That's funny. Do you should turn on your mic as we get a higher in the put votes? Because you know these, you've listened back to them, Tom. Do you know what we were talking about before the apology? No, I don't remember. Sick, man.

A family that was a way of apology was... Yeah, fuck it. The apology was very funny. It was very funny, yeah. It was a fun one. And there was a... You guys were playing with that idea of we live in a culture now where people called out for their actions and, and apologies are quite an art form

that people have had to become good at. And we were playing with that notion of how you do a good apology. Mm. Which is, you know, we're quite political sometimes. We're pretty political. We're pretty equal. We'll go there, we're not afraid to do it.

We're sort of like, and comedians are who you look to in these times Here it is number six A lot of people have been asking us They've been sending us the DMs They've been hitting up the reddit They've been shooting us the tweets. Yeah, they've been tagging us on the gram. They've been contacting us. They've been talking to us in person.

And they've been saying, yo, I just got the comedy festival guide in the Harold Sun. Melbourne International Comedy Festival. I just got the Melbourne International Comedy Festival guide in the Harold Sun. I just got the Sydney International Comedy Festival. It's got the Melbourne International Comedy Festival guide in the Harold Sun. I just got the Sydney International Comedy Festival guide at the factory theater, and I'm not seeing your name in it. Why, where's, I've gone to A.

I've gone to A-U. A-U? Yeah, I've gone to A-U-N. Mm-hmm. Got the A-U-N-T. Yeah. And there's no aunt. If you were looking for us, that's how you would look for us. You tea? Yeah. And there's no aunt.

If you were looking for us, that's how you would look for us. You would. Yeah. You'd say, let's go. Tom, no coughing. No coughing. Oh, come on, mate. Come on, mate.

Sorry, dogs. That's all right. But we're just trying to... We're on a riff, when we're on a bit. And if you cough, that breaks that rhythm and then we need to reassess sort of where we are. I think this podcast lives on the strengths of its riffs. Yeah.

You know, so when we're on a good riff, I think the most iconic moments of this podcast are great riffs. That could have been a great riff. And so when you fucking disrespect us like that, and you fucking disrespect the process, that fucks me off to a point where I'm like I could be baiting gators But instead I'm here getting fucked off So we'll never know now we can't restart that Reef yes that roof so keep your fucking coughs in your fucking pocket. Sorry

Thank you for what was that? I'll just apologize. What are you apologizing for? For coughing in the podcast. Are you gonna do it again? And doing what? And the result? The resulting cough during the podcast did what, Tom? Fuck the riff.

Fuck the riff. Fuck the riff. Okay, at least you fucking understand the way you fucked this up. So we're taking a year off, not even a year off. We're not touring at the top of the year like we have for the last seven years. I just want to say so. I'm still a bit peeved. Okay. Tom, if you could spend just get your phone out and write down an apology

just in detail. We'll get at the end of the podcast. I would like you to read that to our audience. Okay. Okay. Just a big clear apology. If it doesn't go For 45 seconds minimum minimum I'm gonna be fucked off what I need to hear from you Tom. I need to hear a clear apology to us to your fans Okay, yeah, I need to hear your story your side of the story, but I do not want to hear excuses and I want to hear your story, your side of the story, but I do not wanna hear excuses. And I wanna hear a fucking understanding of not only what you did, but the result that it caused

and an understanding of your continuing pattern of rudeness. I also want to hear what actions you will be taking to not cough in the future. And this isn't just, I'm going to have a glass of water, Tom. I've heard I'm going to have a glass of water before. I need to hear concrete actions. Mention the glass of water, that's important. Yeah. But I need to hear concrete actions to encourage me. And you know what, we might not forgive you right off the bat. No, it might take several podcasts.

And we may revisit this for the next 10 to 20 podcasts. I don't know. I don't know how mad I am until I've had time to digest what's happened. Here's a question for you guys. What's the best kind of an apology? One that's heartfelt, one that's changed action. Yeah, that's right because how much stronger is doing than saying. That being said, we wanna hear the apology. I wanna hear the apology.

But then I wanna see change take place in you. And it may even be that the microphones didn't pick up you coughing off microphone. Okay, right? What the fuck? Okay, okay. What the fuck? Alright so, I just want to say sorry to everyone listening, believe it or not, I know there's

a lot of, we play around, we riff a lot. Believe it or not, we had a pretty cool podcast planned for you today. Broden had developed a great character, we will be bringing him in. Maybe, maybe we'll get to it in a couple weeks who knows but Turns out that you're you're not gonna get the podcast. We wanted to deliver to you I Want you to know that that's not just pissing you off. That's pissing me off too. So you're sitting there. You're listening I know that you're mad, but I want you to know

however mad you're feeling right now, it's palpable. It was like, if you're just tuning in now, here's what's happened. We were, if you just got any car, you've turned this on and for some reason, the podcast is skipped forward, nine minutes and 41 seconds. Firstly, welcome, you're listening

to the Anti-Donna podcast. It's so great to have you here. Thank you for tuning in. Weekly Improv Comedy Podcast. Yes. It's a Melbourne-based comedian. Yes, so you know we've got a YouTube channel. We tour around.

We do live shows. We're just releasing a new web series at the moment, but we've got a plethora of videos and content. We release a podcast you might not have heard of every week on a Tuesday. It's a podcast. Sorry. Podcast heard of every week on a Tuesday. It's a podcast, sorry, podcast is a lot like a radio. It's not like talkback radio. You're not like talkback radio,

or radio where they take the songs out and they package it up and you can download it at any time. But there's no gatekeepers. That's the thing. Anyone can make a podcast. Anyone, you, you, you, you can, so many people get together with their grand watch movies, talk about books.

Ricky DeVase from the office has a podcast. Super popular one. There's Joe, Joe Rogan, I believe has a podcast. There's one called this American Life. You should check that out. That was originally radio, but they also upload that as well as a podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So this a part. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So this, so, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So Tom, Tom, how's that going? Good, I'm gonna write you an apology. Can we hear what you've got so far? Yes. Listen here, you dog can't know. I have to stop, I need you to stop.

I need you to stop. So what I was expecting, what I was expecting was a, dear boys or like a dearest friends, something like that, something a little, something sincere, we mentioned the word sincere before in terms of apologies. Yeah, when you said, when you when you started with

dear dog cunts I thought this I was like buzz that's not the best buzz sound I'm gonna find it like a internet like a a.l Internet sort of connection when I'm finding his YouTube's not the best place for sound boards So can I just ask everyone a question here? Genuinely in all seriousness, we can cut this if this is... Is this a joke? Is this some sort of riff? Or because I don't know if Tom is entirely clear

on how serious we are right now. It's very serious. Well, you do this dog-cut line. Yeah. And it makes me think you think we're riffing. And believe it or not, Tom, we can't riff right now because of your attitude. And I want to know, Tom.

I want to know, Tom. Yeah, that's a good buzz. When Broden asked you to read out what you had written and what you had written, you'd known in your head that you'd written, hello dog cunt. So I'm not sure if that was the exact wording of it, but something'm sorry, sorry. I want dog cunt to say no. Apologies for the language here. We will put a beeped version of this on the podcast, on the website in case you're listening with kids. That's worth saying because you mentioned the podcast,

but it is worth saying that yeah, you can get our podcast on Spotify. You can get it on Apple, Macface. But you can also, there's also on podcast on Spotify, you can get it on Apple, Facebook, Facebook. But you can also, there's also on the Christian platform, we do a Christian version of this podcast. Yes. So it's for all our Christian listeners. Well, it's where we're sponsored by Hillsong because we love our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ

and we like to show that appreciation to them through the magic of song. That's just a side note, please. That is the place Tom you fucking can't what you say. So I want to know what you thought Tom was going to happen. What sort of reaction? Does it sound like a joke? It does sound like you're not taking it seriously. Yeah, yeah.

So can I just, can we just hear where you're at just with the opening line? To my dearest friends, okay now that that fills me with a sense of Here comes a heartfelt apology from someone who understands the weight of the situation. Can I tell you something guys right now? I don't believe him I don't believe that he's genuine right now. He's throwing out that this dog-sea-word stuff. And then, and now he does exactly what we tell him to do. It doesn't seem genuine. I think it's PR. I think it's... I think it's BS. I'm starting. Yeah, I think it's BS. I think it's I be yes Which I know all about if you have any questions about IBS Just give it actually I'd like me to ask you to some questions later later. Yeah, which is all about later what

Try again with sincerity, okay? We'll wait we'll wait here. We time now. To my dearest friends. You think that's a sincere voice? Yes. Do you know what I heard then? To my dearest friend. Yeah. I mean, that's kind of on you. That year. Because you did it different to how he said it. Because I heard it. I heard it that way when you said it like that. When Tom said I heard it slightly different. Do you know what? I'm going to own up to that. I'm going to own up to the fact that I misrepresented what Tom said.

I misquoted him. There's no excuses for what I did. I was emotional. I was upset. Tom, firstly, I'm sorry. Yep, there's no excuses for what I did. Yep, I was emotional, I was upset. Tom, firstly, I'm sorry. No worries. I should have talked to you in person, I should have called you,

I shouldn't have done it in this public sphere. I should have talked to you 101. Yeah, I didn't do that. 101, 1 to 1. Yeah, mano, a mano. Mano, a mano, 100, because I'm gonna keep it 100 right now. I'm gonna keep it 100 right now,. I'm gonna keep it a hundred right now, okay? Tom, I let you down.

My second apology is to you too. Thank you. Now this is where, now this makes me think that Zach is sincere. I, listening Tom, let you think that Tom said something in a way that he didn't. I misrepresented the truth, and I made you culpable in something that was my choice, okay? Thirdly, I wanna apologize to you,

the anti-donna community. You don't deserve this from me. Now I know that you could hear Tom, you heard what he had to say. At the time, I thought you'd understand that I was doing a dramatic recreation of what he did, but I accept now that I did not do that. And just just four people who missed it. We're going to replay that segment now of Tom starting his line and then Zach repeating it just in case you missed it. You're only tuning in now. So this is a clip. Go. Yeah. This is a clip from from about 45 seconds ago.

If you're just tuning in now, you may miss this, so you're probably a little bit lost. But just sorry, I think it would be good just to get everyone up to speed. Yep, this is the first 15 seconds of the first anti-donna podcast episode one, just to get you up to this is how the podcast started, episode one, this is what it sounds like now.

Shhh. Tt-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t podcast started episode one. This is what it sounds like now. Alright, Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Dada Onto Donna podcast that brought to you by Strypsils and Anset. There you go. And then so that's context. That context for the fact that we I guess do a podcast And now we're just gonna play for anyone who's just coming in Tom doing the first line of his Before you that would be really nice This is a funny bit from when Bob's say get came on and this is just one of our favorite lines from what Bob's sag

It said just some context but Bob's sake of being of. And this is just one of our favorite lines from what Bob's Saga said. Just some context. Bob's Saga being, of course, a star of stage and screen from America. He's in full house and subsequently fuller house. So he's just, yes, about six and a half seconds of something funny Bob's Saga said on another podcast. Well, I saw an Uber stuck in his stream once

and it was horrible. The driver couldn't get out. He really was. He went, you went, You went, You went, You went, You went, You went,

You went, You went, You went, You went, You went, You went, You went, You went,

You went, You went, You went, You went, You went, He went, He went, He went, He went, He went, He went, He went, So you now play that 45 seconds ago. So let's play that clip of Tom doing the first line of his palette. Sorry, sorry. If you are just tuning in right now, we are about to play a clip.

For a little bit of context, we're just going to play a short audio clip of Mark explaining that we're going to play this short audio clip. So that's from about 45 seconds ago. This is a little clip of Mark initially setting up the idea of playing the clip. So here it is. Yeah.

And just just four people who missed it, we're going to replay that segment now of Tom starting his line and then Zach repeating it just in case you missed it, you're only tuning in now. So great. OK. So you're all up speed now. And unless, of course, you it just in case you missed it and you're only tuning in now. So, great. Okay, so you're all up to speed now, unless of course you've just tuned in, then how are you?

Hello, welcome to the Anti-Donna podcast. A podcast is sort of like talkback radio, but without the songs. Without the gatekeepers, sort of anyone can do a podcast. Joe Rogan, Mark Moron. The guy from the office. Yes, they all have very popular podcasts, Lucy Lawless. If you're looking for something a little different,

I recommend checking out Making Oprah. All right, let's get back to this. Let's get back to this. So here is a clip of Tom reading the first line. Oh, God, if you missed it, Tom coughed, during the... Sorry. What was that? That was me replaying what you said to him.

No it wasn't Tom. Okay. No what that was was disrespect. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, okay.

Cool. Cool. Okay. What did you just say? Oh, I just said what he said three times But I didn't mean anything by it If it's just okay, I would have said okay, okay, okay But now now I realize What I've done Which is I've said a

I've said a group that has been listed by the Southern Poverty Law Centre as a hate group. I've said their name on our podcast, so I just want to apologize. Thank you. Firstly to all of our listeners who were upset by me saying the name of that organisation, I won't repeat it now. I want you to know that that's not what I meant. I meant to say essentially the abbreviation of OK three times. This is not an excuse, I'm just explaining that that's what I meant. Obviously, to a listener, a lot of listeners didn't hear that. That's not their fault.

I should have edited that out. I should have been more aware of How that would be perceived Tom, let me hear the apology up to now. Well, I have a request of my from for my brothers That's you guys by the way. I'm feeling very emotional So I was just wondering if anyone would be prepared to read a written statement on my behalf. I can do that for you. Yes, sure. Okay, so this is Zach reading Tom's apology.

Hopefully for coughing. Yeah, hopefully. Let's see what he has to say. Hi. My name is Zach Rewain. I'm a good friend, a brother to Tom Armstrong. He's sorry he couldn't be here today. He felt that he was a little too emotional. Is that true Tom?

Is that true Tom? This apology. That's true, yeah, for himself. So the following statement was written by Tom Armstrong. We have also sent that out to your publications in an email. So if you do need to check anything in particular, you can look over that. But here we go. This is from Tom Armstrong. He wrote this this morning at 10.37 a.m. To my dearest friends, Mark, Zach and Brandon.

I'm going to reserve. It's not a strong start. Listen here, you dog can't cut fucks. I'm sorry that you're a pack of dog cunts. I'm sorry that I couldn't give two squirts of dog come juice about coughing in the background of your stupid podcast. I'm sorry that I need to sit down every week and check that you haven't said anything naughty on the podcast. I'm sorry. I have to compress your audio channels to the fucking shit house because of your awful microphone techniques. I mean seriously, what is the point of giving you dog cums headphones?

I digress. I'm sorry, you have a problem with me sucking down gatorade saxophones before work, you cums. I'm sorry I smoked bongs till my lungs collapse under the sheer weight of my anxiety. Sorry for coughing. Lovingly, Thomas Armstrong. And there's Thomas... Thomas apologizing. And a good apology, Tom.

I was... What was special is you wrote that on the spot as well. I did. You wrote a very... He did too. He did a rude apology, and he did a very good apology. It was funny You're a funny boy Tom don't let anyone tell you You just gotta put lots of swears and you guys just love it. Yeah, we love it. We do We're dirty little boys You know it's unscivilized

But that was episode two we got two more to go we've got five more episodes you guys voted for How excited are you guys voted for. How excited are you guys? We're getting closer to that put in a stay. To be honest, I'm a little over it. Wow. Me, I can't wait to find out what fans thought. I can't wait to find out what fans thought. That's awesome.

Yeah. Mark, Zach, you were very negative there. I'm done. This better be one of those fucking this better be a Scrooge or a this better be like a your dark moment But then you have a re reawakening and find the true meaning of putmas moment Not this podcast tune in next week find out if I get brought back into the fold of the putmas America Just to get it on the record. what do you think of this whole thing? Over it, don't, don't, don't care.

Blah, blah, humbug. Okay, so that's an indication he's gonna come back when he said, blah, humbug, because that's something in a character who does, one of the who knows I might not? Scrooge. I might just be a scrooge the whole way through. There are some scrooges that don't change.

Okay, all right. So who knows, and if I can keep the bit going for two episodes, I'll do it. Yeah. Well, we'll see you next week to find out what episodes, four and five are, but also, if Zach stays with the bit, have a great puttmas, find a car park, a chat, some if you can.

Do it. Just so everyone knows as well, we're banking these. We are banking these little intros. We're banking them. We are doing them all in one day. So these are also being banks. So last time we were talking about banking, we're banking again.

We're banking. This is the second time we've done a bank. We're banking a lot these days. Merry Pudmas. Merry Pudmas, everyone. See what the banks. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates.

I mean, if you want. It's up to you.