Aunty Donna Podcast - Podcast EP 18 Feat. JESS PERKINS

Episode Date: November 16, 2016

Get around Jess:facebook.com/JessPerkinsComedy/Twitter: @ jess_perkinsInsty: @ jessperkinsJess's Podcast "Do Go On": https://itunes.apple.com/au/podcast/do-go-on/id1057458646?mt=2Support us on Patreon if you want to: www.patreon.com/auntydonnaJoin The Aunty Donna Club: https://www.patreon.com/auntydonnaSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A list-nuff production. You listen to the only ton of podcasts The greatest fucking book I've seen a while Buried my Kentucky sometimes and guessed We hope you enjoy the part of a fucking podcast Hello, hello, is there anything you'd like to say? Hello, hello, hello, sorry I was chewing gum Hello, not chuked

Just checking the microphone's smart, hello, hello Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, sorry, I was chewing gum. Hello, not just checking the microphone's mark. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. One two three. Hello. Is there anything you want to talk about on this like you want to talk about any charities? You want to talk about all right cool? Well, let's do a bit of research. Yeah, I know. Do go on. Please about zero. Bit of a joke to introduce us to our guest for this week's podcast. Brody Kelly. No. Pleasure to be here.

No. Every week, even though I've tried to be like, can we not get broken on just for one episode. And then you imagine the ratings though. I prepared that would skyrocket into the ground. Yeah, they go here. Yeah, I prepared a little thing. Zachary, we're doing something here.

Yeah, we're doing a bit. Yeah, but no, no, when a bit is being done. No, when a bit is being bit. That's rule number one. Well, I'm so sorry, but I just, that's sorry, Jess. Wait, just the middle of something. No, I'm not exactly. You've not made a prepare the Jess introduction,

and now you're doing a bit. Yeah, there's an introduction to shutting out. Zach, they're doing a bit. Jess, we're doing introduction to shutting out. Zach, they're doing a bit. Jess, we're doing a bit. They're doing a bit. Jess, they're doing a bit with Zach now. Sorry, Jess, this is a bit with me now. Yeah.

Sorry. You can't just come in on a bit when, you know, Broden, I've started a bit, Zach's joined in on the bit. We've let him know that we're a bit. Actually, Mark, I was just doing a bit with Jess just then. Just now. It just then when I was saying we were doing a bit. Well, how am I supposed to know

unless you tell me you're doing a bit? you just interrupt I didn't interrupt at all I was about a burden I was just doing a bit with Zach thank you very much excuse me oh Zach and I were doing a bit about when to know someone's doing a bit or not yeah but I was doing my bit from earlier on excuse me I'll tell you what I just round and round in search. I just want to do this for 30 minutes. Zack, the... Mark, I would do a bit... Um, uh, you... Can you not be so rude, Zack? Could you drop a bit, start to drop the...

Sorry, sorry, Jess. With your giggling. Jess, we're... Now we're trying to do a bit where they were telling me off and then you interrupt with your giggling. I'd really appreciate if you didn't do that anymore. Is this interrupt? Is that okay to say?

Yeah, I'm really sorry, though. Jess, I was just doing a bit with Jess. Thank you very much. Can you not come in over the top of that? Do you understand how this works? I don't I don't understand at all because I guessed for this week's podcast is away. No, no, no, it's not you. I'm so sorry. I was just doing a bit with Jess. Oh You're basically my bitch. Excuse me. Two balls and Willie. Oh, God. That is, that's really blue for me. That's, that's really blue, man. Can I please do my introduction for Jess?

I've prepared it and everything. Four, five, six, seven, eight. Dr. Tappet, but but tap, but but tap. All right. I can't do that. I can't do that. What are you doing? Are we doing like a music bit now or something?

I was doing jigsaw falling in the place by radio headquarters because Broden actually started the beat from that song of In Rainbows. Well, my idea was that you are we do the beat and you would just talk normally. Okay, go and be a juxtaposition of ideals. I didn't want to interrupt your bit. What, excuse of ideals. I didn't want to interrupt your bit. What, excuse me? I just didn't want to interrupt your bit. I said you fucked. You fucked before. You fucked. You're a person who fucked. 5, 6, 7, 8.

Boom, boom, boom. Jessica Marie Alba is an American actress, model, and business woman. She has won various awards for her active, including the Teen Choice Award, and the Sad Award for Best Actress on Television and a Golden Globe nomination for her lead role in the television series Dark Angel. We're very lucky to have Jessica Albert in the studio today. Zach, hmm, sorry.

Do you want to tell everyone? Alright. No, I'm really happy to be here. Thank you for having me. Oh wow. Alright, I'm the only one who sees this. It's been worse. It's been Jessica Simpson for the first time.

I'm just sorry, I feel like I'm not, maybe I'm not buying into a joke here, maybe I should just say yes and move on, but I'm not going to say it. This is not Jessica Alba. This is Kieran Perkins. He won a gold medal at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics. Yeah. He'll the record with the 50 million. Got him.

Got him. Got him. Got him. Yeah. Helder record. The fifth name is from London. Got a name on some milk. Pure light stuff. Very good. Sorry, I want to talk today. You've had a very illustrious career, Jessica. You've done a lot of things. You've done the raw. You did raw.

You did very well in raw. Jessica Albert did raw. The raw national finals. This is Jess Perkins. I was doing a bit. It's not Jess Perkins. You did very well in Raw. Jessica Albert in Raw. Raw national finals. Now this is Jess Perkins, I was doing a bit. It's not Jess Perkins. You're a kid. You did very well in the pool.

You've also got a podcast with Matt Stewart. Kick of the pool in the pool. Sorry. A bit of a... But I'm... You really enjoyed that, didn't you? But I'm here to talk to you about a work. It's a Jess Perkins.

I'm here to talk to you about Into the Blue. LAUGHTER So Jess Perkins, I'm here to talk to you about Into the Blue. Oh, he's dead now. He's dead. He was... Is that a surfing film? Yeah, it was You Wouldn't Pull Walker, I believe. Yeah, he's dead now. He's dead.

He's dead. He was... Is that Jessica Alba? Was she in there? Yes, she was. Oh, wow. I remember, a performance. A performance I was always going to remember that.

I remember. I liked you in a walk to remember. Oh, that was Mandy Moore. Oh wow, um 15 year old Zach performance always gonna remember that I like you in a walk to remember Ah, that was Mandy more. Oh, sorry. Oh, wait. Oh, here's you absolute nonce you Many many more like candy. Yeah, yeah, yeah You're thinking of Jess Perkins I've not done any of those things. The Melbourne comedian, podcast. Mandy Moore's now a fantastic four rise up to the store for self. And Mandy Moore was in. I really enjoyed that Jess Perkins here. Yeah.

Thanks God it was an interesting energy today. I'm enjoying it. It's really relaxed and so tested. Yeah, I like it. He's like a late night talk back. No. You would do a lot of late night talk back. He's been your favorite.

Who's a zero and who's a hero? In terms of the late night house, you got Kim, or you got Fallon, you got Letterman, you got Conan. Rove. You got Rove McManus. Well, you got Conan, you got Roe, you got Roe, McManus, well I mean, you got Jimmy Card. So we've just come back, you probably heard the start of Mark's riffing and then it stopped about halfway through, that's because he made a disparaging remark about a person who

was nearby. I imagine. But who is your favorite? Who's my favorite? Late Night nearby. I imagine. But who was your favorite? Who's my favorite late night host? I did love Rove. What the, I believe love that, I'm not that sweet. What the, when I was about 11, I was like on a holiday with my parents.

What was that a week ago? I'm very young. I don't know, I'm 26. I'm 26, yeah. I'm 26, I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, I, how many lackluster bounces there are? But clearly she's not so close. I get it to quite in realise you with that. Oh, you don't look a day over 25. Oh, you, thank you very much. You're very good.

You don't look a day over, a day over. Oh, look a day over. No, stop it. I'm blushing. And for any of our international listeners, Rove, Australia only ever had one talk show. There was a row of him. There was a row of him.

He's internationally known. Yeah, but Rove, Australia's only ever had one late night talk show for a span of like, what, five, six years or something. Might be long. It was a bit longer than that. Started in 99. I don't think it went till I was in year 12. It got closed. Did it?

Yeah, yeah. They moved to Sundays. Yeah, I remember they moved to Sundays. And then it sort of slowly transitioned into the project. What year? They went and carried big more and then they slowly just turned into a problem. What year did the strokes first impression of earth come in? Oh, that would have been like 2006. 2006. Because I know they played juice box on there. I remember watching that. I remember Lady Gaga performance. Oh wow. She had cool video sunglasses. Was she wearing meat? No this is she wearing that gal likes the wear meat. Have you met her? She goes into a butcher's, she's like on the whole shop. I've got to do. I've got to go on a big fashion, dude.

Have you guys met Carrie Bickmore's alter ego? It's this guy who, a karate guy who loves to do karate. Have you heard about this? I thought you were talking about Carrie Bickmore's ready for the best podcast joke you've ever heard, Cunz. Have you heard about this Carrie Bickmore's alter ego? He's a karate expert his name's Barry kick more Pretty good

Do you understand this convention? Why don't you answer the phone delicate sensibilities kind of handle the notion So delicate sensibilities can't handle the notion we have You are the same with that sound I'm pretty on top of it. Yeah. Oh my goodness. What I don't know what background I don't know if she's from it. I've heard of phones you're fucking Oh, and I've heard of matters. Oh My oh my You really hurt bro. It's feelings there. Hey, bro, are you okay? You're out there?

I just meant, you know, like, what you said. Hey. Oh, just a little hug. The phone was ringing. Oh yeah, I made the offer for just answering. I'm amazed that it hasn't, that it hasn't rang out, but it's still going. Hang on, hang on, shut up, Broden, I'm getting the phone. Hello?

Alright, get out. Hello, how are you? That's me, Barry Kickamor. Oh, Barry, we I'm getting the phone. Hello. All right, get out. Hello, how are you? That's me, Barry Kickmore. Oh, Barry, we were just talking about you. Yeah, we were. Yeah. What were you saying? Just that your name sounds a bit like Carrie Bick,

or people told you that. No, no, I've never heard that in my life. Oh, that's funny. Focusing on my karate and doing more of it. What belt are you? I'm a yellow belt. Oh, okay. And what way? Wait, what?

That's second. There's like white. And then how many, do you have any stripes? I've only been doing karate for like a couple of months. Did you, you're obsessed with it? I love it. I love karate. Right, so it's sort of like a period.

I like it. Yeah, yeah. You're a bit, you, you, you You go to karate. You're just assuming because my name is Barry Kickmore that I wasn't born into kicking a lot. Yeah, I would have this year. I was going to change your name. You would have heard Carrie Big Moise in my name is Barry, Barry Kickmore. I can be a karate girl. I'm more than just a pun name on a man. I've got feelings. I don't, I'm so confused right now. What's your role on the project?

I write the jokes, but they don't have to use any of the jokes. I'll just write them, just so they have that as like a safety net. Sure. What's your favourite karate move? I love kickin'. I love to kick. I love to kick. More or less than other things. That's my favourite. Kickin'. I love to kick. More or less than other things.

That's my favourite. Kick him. I love to kick lots. I love to kick more than the normal man. Oh, I love a kick. Are you married, Barry? Am I married? You were married, Barry?

Yeah, I'm married to a genetic. Genet? Will, consider, she kept her name. She kept her name. She didn't want to go with kick more? No, no, no, no, no interest. Is she like kicking? Yeah, I guess she doesn't have the same interest in She really loves Richard Wilkins Wilkins more. Yes, I look me hey, we're hey Jess. This is a true story. You're ready for this? I'm ready. We went to the no activity to season two launch party at a while ago. La di da. Guess you'll never guess it was there. Richard Wilkins. No. Awesome. No. For all our fans,girly for all our international listeners Richard Wilkins is a massive

douchebag He might he might be listening So he's not listening For sure he goes from a hot celeb Australian party to hot celeb Australian party hasn't got time for podcasts What do you think he does in the back of the limo? I agree. Just sit there and twiddles with you. Every woman ever reaches Wokey married with a son. Richard Wilkins for all our international attendees.

Good looking son. Richard Wilkins, what? Richard Wilkins' wife understands that what she don't, no, don't hurt. This is Wokey. So, sorry, for our international listeners, just for clarity. Richard Wilkins is sort of like an angel of bishop.

Type character. Like a male angel of bishop type character Like a male angel of bitch. Yeah, like a male Australian angel of bitch Richard Wilkins gets off the caretaker. He's all right girls line up on Richard Wilkins And then it goes to sleep. We saw him having a chopped off no bullshit. No, what flavor? Did you know either salted caramel? Oh? I think it was peppermint's chip. I was pretty cut at this point. There was free wine flowing so I was cut.

Well yeah. Yeah, Zach and I had a big conversation with Dan Wiley. We got real drunk with Dan Wiley. It was great. Dan Wiley. Well we're great. We're so cool. We're so cool and you'll never understand, Jess.

You always be in the bottom tier. Yeah. It's not funny? Where's so cool and you'll never understand Jess you always be in the bottom tier Yeah, it's not funny if it's true Speak the true stories Richie Wilkins comes and goes hey come here. He gestures for me I can probably this is all true Yeah, you guys you haven't been my dickies Yeah, I was like no tell me Richard What did he say? It's this, and then he just sort of gestured with his hands like, oh my God.

That's funny, he said to me, he went to me, he went, he went, I don't want to know how big my dick is. I was, yeah, anyway, all right, come with me. And then he took me out to the party, and we had to go for a bit of a walk down the street because where we were, where we were was all underground power. We had to find a power pole. One of those wooden power poles. He just pointed that one, that but without the shit sticking out of it up. He did. This is true. This is true.

It's funny because he said to me, he said, hey, Zach, I said, yeah, I said, I'm Richard Wilkins. And I said, yeah, good. I said,, you want to know how big my dick is? And I said, is it about five and a half to six inches? He said, yep. Which is just above average. Why did he say that to you? And then something different to market on? That's weird. He speaks truth.

He speaks truth to me. He speaks truth to me. I'm going to find out who the mole is here. I feel like one of us is telling Porkey pies. Who knows how big Richard Wilkins peen asus? Yeah, right in on the text line. Yeah, text line. Which one of us is telling the truth about a rich person?

You've got to guess, because one of the stories is true. One of these stories is absolutely true. The guy from the, what's the channel nine? What today? With Carl's, definitely. So, what are the two other stories of pork Porcupines what is a delicious truth pasty? Well I think it's for the record though before you guess it's not how big is Richard Wilkins dick. It's who how big did Richard Wilkins say his dick was?

Yeah yeah yeah yeah. Well and that's what I was thinking and so therefore it's quite obvious that Mark is telling the truth, that they went on an old, because I feel like Richard Wilkins is a type that would take you on an elaborate journey to point out something kind of obsolete, because he's a little bit obsolete in a way, isn't he?

Well, I think he's the most relevant Australian personality with that. Yeah. He, he, he. No, I'll say it. You said it. You said it. Perkins, but the truth. Yeah. Okay. Personality with He he no, I'll say it You said it's Perkins but the truth yeah Okay, so I'm gonna just say the lyrics to a song first person to work out what the song is buzzing Okay, is this a name Z buzzers?

Is this a game segment that you started? I just thought I was feeling the butt the game speaks and specs now What are we doing? All right, so I've got no no joke in mind I just thought this could be a good launching pad. It's all right we cut it. I've had a little bit too much much. That's um all of Lady Gaga let's dance. Lady close. No. I've had a little bit too much. That's less dance Lady Gaga. Not let's dance but dance. Just dance. Woo! I knew the song. So that's a half point. Let's dance lady go go not let's dance but dance just dance

I knew the song So that's a half quick. I knew that half point for Broden For knowing the song and then I was changing the words. I'm sorry. What to the correct one all right I'm getting a call from the judge Ring ring. Hello judge judge Ryan hold not well. Excuse Judge, your voice is a lot like Broden Kelly's. No, it's not. Oh, okay, hello. How you doing? Sorry, there's another Judge talking over you.

No, no, this is just one Judge, and my name is... Judge Ryan Hold. Okay. Look, I'm a master of impressions. I do one. Do you want me to hear me do Broden? Ah, wow, yeah sure. Broden. Broden. That's really good. Mark Bonanno from Antidona. Yeah, good. Go do it.

Oh, hi, my name is Mark. And I'm on 27 years old, 28 years old, and I love to dance. I also do a really great Jessica Alba. Yeah, cool. Do I hear it? Yeah. Hi. There you go. Wow.

For anybody that's just tuning in right now, all three, all three of the other things. It's just when you would just click on radio stations. Pretend you love it at the same time. We love it at the same time sometimes. All right. Do you have three heads? We can radio stations. Pretend we love it at the same time. We can be one point. All right. Do you have three heads?

No. We? Do. Wow, you have three heads. Yes. We? Love. Do.

Do. Stop. I was about to be mad at you guys. We love to Stop I was about to be mad at you guys Turn it guys being the gendered neutral guys I was about to be mad at you folks for For, um, taking this out. Armish now. I'm in the Bajar Armish folks. Well, just a couple of bad Joe guys. Into neutral. Into Bajar guys.

No, no, no, no. Let's folks over here. We love to dance a little. Do you know we are at my old hospitality job? Um, at the movies. At the movies. Signed a form that said I wouldn't say exactly what. Really?

Yeah, there's a social media clause in our casual contract. Wow, I went to the MCG, they said, don't ever talk to the press. Do you have the casual job, Jess? What do you do? I do have a casual job. I'm going to call center because I'm living in that dream.

What do you do? I just talk about. I probably can, I don't really give a shit. So I probably can talk about it. I work at the call center for the good guys. Oh, that sounds like a good job. Is that like people calling up to complain about? It's more like the fine guys.

It's the fine guys. Well, that's the thing, right? Because people will call to make complaints. And they'll be like, you're not the good guys. You're the, you're the bad. No, that's the thing. They don't go with that. You're the bad. No, that's the thing. They don't go with that. You're the, you're the assholes.

And I was so disappointed in him for missing the obvious job. But you're the worst dudes ever. Yeah, you're the little bit shit we got one time in the name now. You're the little bit shit guys. It's like, what the fuck? You've got to understand that they're waiting on their front loader. Yeah, mad. You do a lot of deliveries or is it a lot of, I thought it was a lot of a...

What is the call centre for? Like the people order white goods. Yeah, which is the correct term over the phone? No, we can't put through any orders. We can't make any changes to their web orders. We basically look at which store it's been allocated to and then transfer them to the store. Like we can do nothing. Oh wow well that's pretty good at least it's not a lot of pressure. No it's so good. That's fine. Are you allowed to be on your phone at work?

No. Do you have a computer with the internet? Yes but limited. And you went on a lot of pens and paper either so I can't even do that. Limited'm limited to porn. Yeah, it's limited, you can only, because I sometimes look in porn. Sometimes I just want to read the news. I just want to find out what's happening, but I have to watch porn at work.

You should watch the porn on news. Yeah, that's true. Where does the porn on news? They used to be naked news. I remember that. Just the news delivered by a smoking hot babe. I was jealous of all my friends. With their memory glands exposed. news delivered by a smoking hot babe. I was jealous of all my friends.

I was jealous of all my friends with cable television because they could watch the naked news. Ring ring ring. Hello. Hello. This is British Bill. Hello. From Britain. All right. Just a second guys, I need to take this call. What the fuck are you doing calling me, British Bill? British Bill, I'm British Bill, listen here, Zach. I know you're covered in love the next year potentially. Yes.

I just wanted to make sure you were to go out to a pretzeman show. Hello, it's British Bill still on the line. What the fuck up? It's British Bill. I can't hear him, you've walked out of the studio. Mark. You're not here right now. You went for a walk to talk to British Bill privately.

Oh, okay. And I'm still in the podcast studio. I know you stepped out to talk to me, or even to talk to you. Well, I haven't yet, but... Pfft. Pfft. Zach, what the fuck is going on with British Bill?

Why are you in the podcast studio? I've left Jess alone in the podcast studio. God knows what she's saying. It's British God knows what she's saying. Where they all go? I don't know why she screamed like that ahead. How can you even hear her British Bill? We're not in, we are not how clear do we have to make this? I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm omnipresent. I'm everywhere. I know we're at the same time. Oh my god. British Bill. Brothers is taking yes and to the next level. Right? So I certainly have

and I'm going to do it. Dates. I British Bill. I'm British Bill. Your couple stows have London. You're like one of those dads that wears a t-shirt that says, if you date my princess here, the rules, rule number one, I am everywhere because you turn up in my bowl of pasta. I'm everywhere. So be careful when you're fucking my daughter and then I'm just trying to drink some milk. And then we're gonna just bill. My girlfriend's dad just turns up in the milk and he says

British Bill That what you want to be said Yeah, I made it I just threw it to you and that was a great I probably wouldn't show up in a big bowl of pasta I think I'll probably show up in some bangers of Yeah, all right, I'm at the pub. I'm with my girl She's British all can Britain British pub probably yeah British pub. I'm with my girl. She's British All could Britain British pub probably yeah British pub. I'm just trying to enjoy a warm Laga Just a warm Laga I put my I gotta I gotta have a crisp I gotta have a bloody crisp and I come over in a glass

I say don't fuck with British. I'm, I fuck British people, you are everywhere. I'm never gonna get a chance to bone your daughter. Yeah, bone my daughter. Why don't you bone a chicken? Are you a butcher? No, no, and I am not one. No, right. Interesting take.

I guess you're all butchers and none of the same dogs. And I could could I created racism Oh, as a concept in the early 400s Okay, no, this is good. This is How many children have you killed I've killed nine kids there we go. I've killed But they were bad kids. Where they yes, they were stealing things and they would talk back to their That's up to you, Phil. Yeah, no, like, oh, this is your podcast. And I don't want to be here. I think we've had fun. You know, I've had fun with this, Phil.

I think the point we get back to the podcast studio, because Jess is just sitting there alone. God knows what she's saying. Just having a big ol' waaaaang. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Are you saying that or are you doing that both? I don't know I we can't hear I can't hear it We're not only president my god. How this concept is so easy to understand He was calling British bill was calling it you walked out the talk to exact walked out the point to it now You're going for clarity when did up your pointing and saying you when did Barry kick more leave by the way Oh, he hung up

Oh, did he hang up? Did he I think he just sort of left I think he just kind of wandered off I think he put the phone down and wandered off Yeah, he was done. Oh, I like character. Yeah, we Richard Wilkins went on it was sort of he He dropped the Wilkins bomb. Yeah, and then he stepped back as he knew that He knew that once Donna got started on richy Wilkins when you mentioned Wilkins bomb and then he stepped back as he knew that he knew that once Donna got started on richy Wilkins when you mention Wilkins when you mentioned Wilkins you've done your time is done. Do you have you ever heard of a red telephone box So we have in London you heard it. Oh well there are great attraction next time you'll lala make sure you have a big Guinness pie

A pie a log Okay, is it a red telephone box? What are some other sites people should see in Lama? Yeah, we're here in Lama. Are you sure you go high? Have you seen Harry Potter and the Wizards of Oz part one and whatever it's called? First time, you're the first time.

Well, I've seen that a lot of them much, but I saw Harry Potter go to their shops. I said, I said, hey, come here. Is the fictional character? Yes, I'm very sorry. He's old now. He's 48, and he works for Virgin. I said, Arri Vot in a fish. Why are you coming?

He works for our Virgin as in a mystical virgin queen or the aeronautical transport company, Virgin. 38-year-old man who's never had sex, because his eyes are funny. Ring, ring, ring, ring. Hello, hello, you're on the air. Oh no, don't watch. Oh, don't watch.

Hello. Hi, who's this? It's me, English Evan. I'm applying for the part of the British person on this podcast. Oh, did you? Oh, Jesse. Oh, we're low, we're low. Well, no. I'm sorry, just all oh, well, oh, well, oh, well, sorry just always

That's my catchphrase. Yeah, I don't really don't do just do you want to do you want to tell him? Or should I tell no I can't wait to be a part of this podcast? No, he seems so excited. I'm English heaven. I went to eaten. Oh, he sounds like I love You love eating them your big cut. I love eating He's a miser. You love eating them, you're big cunt. I love eating. I love eating them. I'm not going to confrontations.

All right, all right. English heaven. Oh, I can't wait. I just simply cannot wait to be a part of this podcast. There's just been a slight mix up. Yeah, here's right. Basically, before you speak, I wanted to say something. Could I say something?

Please, I'd be say something. Could I say something? Please, you have a flaw. Please, as long as it's not just ignore that other British way. Yes, I'm not really hearing him. I can't hear him. I have a sake of dramatic irony. Oh, right. I'm so sorry. You're allowed to speak. I'm sorry, but...

We all have a voice. I just wanted to say... I just wanted to say... How wonderful excited I am to be a part of this podcast. And I wanted to thank you for having me be a part of this. Okay. What did you have to say? Oh, and I love you.

English Heaven. Yes. Look, basically something's happened. Yes. You're washed, but killed in a car accident. Well, I was getting to that. I'm so sorry. It's all right.

British Bill's just come in and told you. What's that? Oh. British Bill. Hello. I'm from England. What? Your wife's dead.

I don't know why I've stayed, but she died like two hours ago. Yeah, yeah. We're quick over in England. We love being on a tube. We like things quick. I just, I don't, yeah, we are very quick. Is that right, British? That's right.

You're listening to the English radio shows. That's right, BBC 4. We've got Jess Albert in the room. Jess. That's right, people in C4. We got Jess Albert in the room. Jess, what's your favourite thing about putting it in here? Are you having a strike? Yes, someone by leg to have so working. I've had two medis, I've had two medis, spotted dick puns.

I've just got to say, I'm a little bit disappointed that you let this Australian boy in a get lost mark get lost Oh If only mark was still in the studio UK Uranium You had a good 20 minutes I got a thinkable name starting. You had a good 20 minutes. I couldn't think of a word. You were right.

I'm starting with you or another thing to call Britain. Another thing in England. It's lovely to make you UK, your radio. It's an absolute humour. I'm just a staunch UK woman who loves to put things in a band bag. I'm mixing up with some Worcestershire sauce. Very good. I get sure I've put them in there.

I put it in a whole bottle of Worcestershire sauce. And then I sell them on the street. And I help those men. And then I laugh at them, and they hit them. And vomit. They vomit all over their skin. Can we all talk about how much we love for Chichi Chichi sauce and I do love all Chichi's to try. I'm you okay you ready I'm making

a homeless man vomit on the skin with Worcestershire sauce. That's full of tourists! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was very silly boy, but his question was quite a bit. What are you having with Harvings? What about Harvings? Oh my god! What are you having? What was your day? I was having Harvings, but he was just being bloody hell in his face. He was being a hell in his face! What was that?

How you gonna repeat it, you're just a jerk. What are you doing? What are you doing? I'm a... Uma! I'm UK Uma. I'm a suspect of him. I'm a man with a UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I'm UK, I don't even know what I'd like to put the head on them. That's a little grouper. Oh, for a pirate ship.

I love a pub-backed chap-captain Jack Pearl. If anyone would like a ride on Puffing Billy, I'd get discount tickets on the weekend because my uncle drives it. Puffing Billy in a stream, yeah? Yes. Oh, oh, oh. What, why, why? And that in Pollywood's, Pollywood pillion, it's fair. Yes! Oh, wow. What, why, why?

And that in pulley woods, pulley, pulley wood side, pulley wood side, pulley wood side. Come on, boy, you're on the ship, pulley wood side, you're on the ship, it's the pulley wood side team. You're on the ship, get they were while it works off pirate ship Yeah, you are compoer. She's home You're listening to she sorry what no no, I was just saying you're listening to the I'm being told to wrap it up by this sound band But Tom Tom Tom is his name Tom. I don't know I'm from England. You're seeing I think you call him Thomas. I think you'd call him Thomas. I think we'd call him Thomas.

We'd have some port for dessert. For I'm from Italy. Oh, like the tank engine. Anyway. Your bloody Thomas, the tank engine is the joke there. You'll listen. I love to see. You'll listen to the British hour on BBC.

We've just had the wonderful guest Jessica Elba. Jessica Elba, if you wanted to promote any Melbourne comedians that you're a fan of, please feel free. I've had good things about Danielle Walker. I think she is. Just go in places. She's going places. You know what a plug just perkins at all. No. Any podcast. Any place. I'm going. I love to go. Luddling and he could never sell for a big. Oh but darling can live there. What a silly

duffer you are. You're there. You're there. You're there. You're there. You're making sure you bring up Bella because it's so rey Thank you and good night You go watch this to the doo co-op podcast about a a David chase The elephant of that place. It's real funny. Oh god, please. They do Please, they do Please, please sir. Can you listen to my podcast? And if you do get the chance do check out

Fantastic Four Rise of the Civil Surfer. I thought it was just a lot of fun and and really didn't deserve the the backlash at God if you're here Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Hey, I'll gay a soul for civil coffee for a coffee shop Absolutely and and from you. What was your name now? You're okay. You're right, you're both over now. You're okay, you're anymore. UK Uma, you can call me.

What have you like? I'm just a stalled British bitch. Good night. You've been listening to the Aunty Donna Podcast. Thanks for joining us for another rip-episode brought to you by Aunty Donna Club.com. See you next week!