Aunty Donna Podcast - WE'RE BACK!!!

Episode Date: May 26, 2026

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This is a Grouse House podcast. Hello, welcome to the Auntie Donna podcast. I am, sorry, actually, this music doesn't quite work anymore. Sorry, everyone. Hello. Do not adjust your television sets. It's me, Zach Rewain, with a little bit of Jack Duane in me still. Got to shake that.

I'm Zach Rewain. I'm joined by Broden Kelly. Hi, Zach. How are you? And Mark Bonano. What's up? Obviously, as you know, we did retire permanently from the Auntie Donna podcast a few months ago, weeks ago, depending on who you're talking about. But last week, this is hard for me to talk about because they were all friends about.

Take your time. Take your time. Last week, the new hosts of the Auntie Donna podcast, Jack Dwayne, Grand Designs, Batman, And of course, Angelina passed away on air. That was a very shocking turn of events for all of us. And if you experienced any, if it was traumatizing few listening, of course, we can't predict these things, but sincere apologies to you. And if you had young people in the car listening, kids in the car, going to school,

who heard three people pass away. I mean, of natural causes. It's tough. She was my brother's. Great grandma, I think. Like Kelly Holiday? No, no, Kelly Holiday is not my brother. But he's, her kid was...

Her kid. Something like that. Scott Banana. Yeah. Oh, yeah, right. So he's torn up about it. Yeah, it was shocking. I mean, obviously, it's...

Sudden. It's sent... Sudden. It's sent shockwaves through the entire grasshouse, haven't you done well, Auntie Donna family. Mm. We were still a part of the podcast. but behind the scenes we're still.

I was more of a casual listener. Yeah. I caught two or three Epps and just checked in on it. But I mean, we were all part of the board for having you done well. We were focusing more on the business. But obviously with such a shocking turn of events, we don't know what to do with the podcast yet. We are looking for new hosts.

In the interim, we have agreed to step in on a, on a short-term basis to host the podcast, keep it afloat until we find those new hosts. And the other days of the week, we'll be other great comedians, so Ronnie's going to keep doing Wednesdays. Ronnie's doing Wednesdays. You know, we're going to keep that kind of going.

Ron and Ching. Oh, not Dangerfield. No, he passed away as well. It can happen so quickly, and I think that's the lesson that I learned from watching and listening just as a casual viewer is that death can happen so suddenly. Ronnie Dangerful died 22 years ago.

Too soon. Before podcasting was really a thing. But have you heard rapping Ronnie his rap album? Yeah. I highly recommend it. But that's a lesson I learned is that death is at the door. It can come for you at any moment. So don't take any risks.

Don't leave the house. Don't leave the house. Don't do much of anything. You only live once. Exactly. So don't risk that being a short life by doing fun and adventurous things. Every time you cross the street, you are taking that one life that you have into your own hands. So don't cross that.

Don't cross that street. I just want to apologize in advance. We're all a little rusty. We haven't been, I mean, I haven't done the podcast. I left months ago, yeah? I left months ago. So I haven't done this podcast for a long, time. I've been focusing on the business. I talk a little differently now. I say things like

focusing. I've got a slightly British accent now because I've been working. I've been working and expanding. We've been trying to expand into Singapore. I've been working with a lot of British business partners there. So I, I, I'm a little rusty on the comedy. I'm crushing it. So I don't know if that's. Oh, that's great. Yeah, yeah. It's really good to see. I'm killing it. But we're here. We're going to keep it afloat. I feel like I'm not missing a goddamn beat. And I just threw to something.

I thought this week could be a game. Yes, that's right. We remembered we had a quick meeting. That's right. When Tom asked us, hello Tom. How are you, mate? When Tom asked us to come back, fill in for a short time,

while we found that the search is happening, I believe. Yes. The search is happening for new hosts. Yes. It's going to be a worldwide talent search. Wow. It's going to be a competition. So is they're going to be, so are we looking at relocating people if they're the right?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Wow. We have to. I mean, you really, we really want the best. The best of the best for this show. It's like a Simon Cowell Netflix documentary situation. That's great synergy. Have you talked to Lee about that?

No. Talk to Lee or talk to Mon. I think we should try for the networks. We need to cut through against old me. I was watching Al Jazeera the other day alongside Global. CNN and they were talking about cutting through on a global scale. It's absolutely important. It's vital, I think.

And that's, but, you know, we're going to try and be funny. We're going to try and remember who we were. But as we were talking, we had a brief meeting. Sort of we just, we, we, we, we. Just a refresher. I couldn't talk too much. We agreed to this two days ago. And Lucy had, had us on for a 15 minute meeting,

catch us up on where the podcast is at. I got, I got Pritig and Courtney to get on the Patreon. which is one of our... That's right. We thought we'd do a game. One of our revenue streams. He used to do a game. And I said to say that you were Broden

and to put out to our audience, what some questions we could posit... I could pitch to Zach and Mark, Mark, about the Auntie Donna Cannon, which is so loved by Australians and people abroad. I have to take this. You're taking a call? I have to take this.

It's from Singapore. It's late. Watch your headphones. Zach's wearing civic video hat. I thought I could do a quiz for the people at home. Yes. And for you, Mark, Mark and Zach. Well, I don't care.

You close the goddamn deal. You close it. You hear me? Zach's closing a deal. He's become a lot more business-focused over the last... Listen to me. If you don't close this deal, I'll eat you for supper.

Wow. Seems like he's really closing that deal. Eating a lot of people for supper. Closing those deals. You've got to eat people for supper. But we're still the cool young guys, you know, from Frog Man and stuff like that. But that's why I've got this. And the man beasts.

And the man beasts. And Italian men eating his own. Kunatu shit or whatever. Yeah. Sort of thing. All right. What should the prize be for who? I want you to keep.

I want you to keep tab tom. So what's happening? I'm so sorry, you'll have to catch me up. It's a quiz question. Yep. Quiz questionnaire. Have you indulged in the Beast Games? I must, I must implore you to watch on the Beast Games.

I know he's a very savvy businessman. Yes. And the prize that he offers is $5 million. So maybe something along those lines. Oh, sure. I know James. Just to raise the stakes. I know James and I think he's the way he's utilized those platforms and I think he's an amazing businessman.

He's cash poor. He is cash poor. Did you know this? He's not particularly liquid. He's cash poor. So what are you proposing? I'm going to read to some quiz questions. Before you do, I do think Mark decided to put a bit of a wage on it.

I think that's quite a fun idea. What are you proposing, Mark? I'm thinking that the winner has to be. buried alive and wins a million to five million dollars. Well, I think I'd be happy to put up a million dollars. I'd put up a million dollars. So the winner of this competition has to pay the other a million dollars. The loser is buried alive.

And I say let's make this a little more interesting. Yes. Perhaps the winner is also buried alive. Very good. We're just going to throw to an ad now from our sponsors here, a wonderful place to travel with the family, Dubai. What? And we're back. Now, boys, here's some questions about the Auntie Donna world from our fan base on the patron.

First one is, which two major historical figures did Zach interview in podcast episode 141? And who's keeping tabs of the scores? Tom. I want to make sure there's no and maybe cheating. Buzz in with your name. No Tom foolery,

even though Tom is the one who's keeping score. I think we make this a little more interesting. Okay, what do you propose? I propose that whoever wins this gets to... I can finish it if you don't have a thought. Zach, you stop talking. I have a lot of thoughts. I just don't want to say it on podcast.

How about we make this a little more interesting? The winner, gets to take their prize cow, or bovine, up the stairs of the other person's apartment. Very good, very good. And the loser has to get that cow down the stairs. Oh, I love that. I think that's great. Good luck is all I'll say.

Very good. I think my house manager will be a little disappointed. Yeah, I think the body corporate, I think I have to talk to the body corporate of mine just to get approval if I lose. Wait, are we talking about our house or the investment apartment building? Well, whichever one has stairs. I think it has to be your house and I think it's your building manager.

I don't think we should be doing investment apartments. No, but I'm on the board of the body corporate in my... No, the cow goes to your house. And it's yours? Fantastic. We're not going to any apartments for this. The cow goes to the house, the main house. Aye, aye, aye.

Which to major historical figures did Zach interview in podcast 141? Was it Peter Jackson? No, incorrect. If you ever get the chance to go to New Zealand, you have to go. He has a theatre in his house. And that's where he watches his edits. I think I know this. Arnold Palmer.

No. Stalin and Mussolini. So no points there. It was a wonderful episode. Do you remember that? Yes. No, no. I couldn't imagine going that.

I wouldn't want to upset the Eastern European demographic. Why does Martin Scorsese not use IMDB? Because he is. No, Buzz. No, my answer was Buzz. Oh, sure. Is that not incorrect? No.

That's a shame. That is my dear friend Alexi Toliopoulos played Martin Scorsese in that episode. But I had to betray him in order to secure a deal. And that's the thing. So we don't talk anymore. But Alexi, I believe he said he was DB. Correct, Zach. That's one point.

Fantastic line. Next one. What did Mark call Don Man? to his face. Do, correct? That's a point to Mark. How could I forget? When I looked at a very rich man in the eyes and referred to him as Doe,

which is part of the product of the company that he was CEO for. It works on so many of those. Yes, it does. I think Don has a bit of a sense of humour, knowing him better now. I think he would appreciate that joke. Yes, I think he would have appreciated. And thank you for, I'm sure you're listening, Don. Ah, Don.

In Auntie Don's first D&D game, which 2000s says Dungeons and Dragons? Which 2000s TV star did Sam base his character on? Television star. Yeah. I try to watch television and I try to watch internet content. You know, I say, you know, a lot of people think you must just watch operas now. But now I do try to watch internet television. television and and Mel Blunk no no a television star James Van Derby no was Tony

Shalube Tony Shaloobe Tony Shaloobe Tony Shalooleud Tony of course um of course which pizza topping did Mark pitch to Don May mushrooms no no no I was it Vongaleigh clams with a with a white sauce A Bianca base. A Bianca base. I'll give you the points for that. A vongolay with white sauce. Clams with white sauce.

From dominant. How do you fucking shit. Hey, let's ask not, you don't know where they'll get their clams from. I did the hot honey one the other day. Pretty good. Oh, it's the hot honey. Hot honey clams? Hot honey pepperoni.

Hot honey pepperoni. Very nice. Hot honey pepperoni. We do a score check, Tom. Mark is on two. Zach is on one. Wow. Wow, it's close race.

Let's make this a little more interesting. Okay. Whoever wins gets to take Tom's wife as their own. Tom, do you agree? One night for one night. No, I don't know. And I'll give you $5 million. Okay, done.

And the loser takes Tom as their wife for one night only. I think of people as play things now. The good thing about this deal is that win all do's, you're a winner. The money, the getting's good in the comedy online industry. Yes, it is. The getting's good. Yes. In the real estate agent's video, in what suburb of Melbourne was the house being shown off in the video?

That was a sort of a lovely suburb, a sort of green suburb. Rippon Lee. Ripon Lee. No Was it Warren died Warren died Correct Tom That's a point

Tom's in the game now Tom you're in the game now Yeah Tom The game Tom And what a wager if Tom But wins I'm prepared to

If you're willing to put a million Into the pile I think we can make this A little more interesting Yeah okay I risk it And we'll put the car in your house If Tom wins He has to

Get into the driver's seat Of a Tesla dressed as a crash test dummy and at 120 kilometers an hour run directly into a brick wall. Yeah, that's fun. Yeah, okay. If he wins.

Yes, I like that. What can melt men smell from 100 meters away? Pork. Pigs. A bit more detail, please. Bowvine, sausages. What kind of pig? Wet pigs.

A moist. Hog. A moist hog, correct? A moist hog. And one day we hope to make a film of Meltman. Unironically. Do you mind if I'd just take a quick call? We can edit it out.

Oh, please. Sure. Kim, how are you? Listen, I know you don't deal with the news department. You like to keep a degree of separation. But that piece about our company was unacceptable. And I'd like you to talk to Hugh. This is Kim Beasley.

Keep what he's talking. Thank you. Who was that? Sorry, that was Kim Williams, the chairman of the ABC board. From the Auntie Don of the album, how does Professor Wiskers die? He's put down by Ben.

No, he's... Correct. He's run over by car, by Sammy Jay. Shot by Sammy Jay, yeah. The vet took out his revolver and fired one shot. Not Sammy J by you. You're the vet. That's right, I'm the vet.

That's a point each, I think. I don't mind. No, no. I think zero's only. I think we answered that one in collaboration. Ben was the owner. Look, it's a million dollars. It's not pass out straws.

What's the phrase? It's not argue over spilt. It's not like we're... You know what? I say we make this a little more interesting. No. Here's a good question. Oh, yes, here's a question.

When you boys did your album tour, stop in Hobart. Yeah. Zach came on stage singing about what he did that day in Hobart. What did Zach do? I think I went to Mona. And what did you get there?

A sausage roll? No. You get some sort of candy in the shape of a labia? No, you got a boner at Mona. Ha! That's why you need to keep notes. I could have put that in the podcast. That was one show.

I said boner at Mona. That's fantastic. Boner at Mona. Clearly resonated. It's years later. I don't mind a little bit of dominoes from time to time. Oh, it's lovely. I think it's a bit of fun.

But I'm not, I don't get dominoes when I'm in the mood for pizza. No, I get dominoes when I'm in the mood for dominoes and when I'm depressed. The year 12, penguins mum got a lot of help from what organization to make ends meet. What's this now? The Year 12 Penguins' mum. Who's the Year 12 penguin? Do you want help? I can tell you with this. That was a character you played

Zach on the Antedon podcast. A penguin who helped you helped students with the year 12. The National Institute of Circus Arts. Not Nica. No, not NICA. The Year 12 Penguin's mum got a lot of help from what

organisation? help ends meet. Goodness, a Salvation Army. Close. Oh. St. Vincent's DePaul? Close. Think more.

The Catholic. The Christian. The church. The church. Goodness. That's a point to each, I think. Yeah, I'm happy to. No, I feel like together we got to the bottom of this.

Who is Rango? He's a God type figure. He's a animator. lizard. We are all Ranga. Oh, that's a point to each. Because together we together we want to. That's what matters. Why don't we make this a little more interesting? What do you propose? I propose that whoever wins this round, whoever wins this round

has to organise the entertainment at the next party. And now about making it a little more interesting. If you win this round and the next, the loser has to spend the summer on the other person's yacht. No, I don't think I'd mind that. Your yacht is delightful. As is yours. I'm putting it in there in the hopes I lose. Yes.

At the start, at the video sketch, that's what you get, in brackets, talking behind a friend's back. What game are Broden and Mark playing the start at the game? Playing robots. Yeah, correct. That's a point to Mark. Let's make this interesting. What do you propose? I propose we get some of the, a good menagerie of early 2000s comedians based in Las Vegas.

We tell them there is a locked locker at a train station. In a rural sort of cowboy ghost town. And we make them race like rats for it. I think it's a wonderful idea. I think it's an absolutely wonderful idea. We could base some of the challenges or some of the casting on the film Rat Rays. What was Zach's character based on

during the pod episode an Arctic Circle RPG featuring Matthew Jackson? I believe it was the actress, the one from SAFE and Magnolia, Julianne Moore. Correct, that's a point of that. Fantastic actress. A good to score update, Tom. Mark on four, Zach on two, Tom on one.

Wow. As I'm happy with that. Tell me. Yes. Are you going to opening night of the new MTC player? Well, I have been invited, but I have many affairs that night to deal with. So I'll have to see if I can squeeze it in. I might just come for the drinks, I think.

Yes. In the sketch, masturbating in a tent. Mm. Which Australian golf player gives Mark the horn? Australian golf player Andrew Gays Oh I'd have to say Goodness what's his name

Blonde fellow Greg Norman Greg Norman Correct Tom to point to Tom Greg the shark Norman Well I help Yeah I've got to love you I think I should

I think that's a point to each I think that's a point to each Sure sure sure You got to get you got to the bottom of it together Greg I think A good man But I I just wish he'd stay off of the media a little bit.

Who was the first guest on the Antidropoc. I got that. Well, Tom, go ahead. Speak up, Tom. I think it was Ben Russel and I think he was just there. Correct, yes. We must have him on again. An extra point for just saying he was just there.

I think Tom deserves. For that little bit of tell tale. Yeah. when Auntie Donner first performed on Just for Last Canada Eight years ago Yeah What was the sketch we did Too easy

Come on guys Oh it was it Oh everything's a drum Of course By the way Zach I have a sketch I have a check From our lawyer

For 140 odd dollars Oh wonderful How did you get that? They just sent it to me Oh Can I cash it and have it No I'd like that check please I think it's um

You know obviously that's not a terribly high amount of money But I think um You don't get to where we got to By um Disregarding such amounts Yeah that's very nice Got to watch every penny Did you see my garden

Last time you came over No no I didn't I just think there's something off about it I don't know What I don't know. I think I'm going to change gardeners. Nothing I can place exactly, but I just, oh, something strange.

I just don't like the way they cut the mazes or something. Something's a little off. Who married Broden's first girlfriend, Ella Corley? I know as well, I'd be winning this quiz if I'm out. You're playing, Tom. You're playing, Tom. Man, sir. Goodness, it's not like we're playing for any real money.

Was it Jerry Maguire? It was a Tyson. First size of Balasso. Well, Tom, then that's for you. You get that point. Goodness me. And I knew everything's a drum too, but I didn't want to jump on. And the last question, what are Andrew W.K.'s parents' names?

Canonically, not really. I couldn't tell you. They were Irish, aren't they? They were Protestant and Catholic. We did a bit of that. I'm afraid I have no idea for this one, Broden. I can't remember that. This one is worth 900 points.

Oh, shit. Can I have a hint at least? The way we're talking is appropriate. Yes, I remember it was that sort of chance. Like Sir Livingston. Say some first names. Charles. Charles.

Charles. Andrew? No. Gerald? No. Thomas. No. Montgomery.

No. Shansonia. Goodness me. I don't know. I don't know. We give up? We must understand. We're very middle class.

Nigel and Genevieve Nigel and Genevieve I've never felt particularly comfortable in these sort of events and that sort of thing we're terribly middle time Well that's the quiz show

We go to the point Do you remember how we open The very first episode of the podcast brand No play it now Play the start of a podcast now To do do do do do do Do do do do

Play it I want to hear the first Ever episode I want to hear the first 15 seconds It's a terrible charming Yeah Look back on

Where we've come from. Blaspham Parish. It's very, very, very, very, it is, you know, it's terribly. I've gone to Antidonald of the Artist, not Antitonnell, the Podcasts. Oh, entirely different things. Yeah, here you go. Very much. Why is this?

Retroactively. Oh, we went back and added all this. This is me singing. Let's go. Let's go. Who's that boy? Auntie Donna podcast Brought to you by

Strepsils and Anset Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da It's a pizza See how much we've grown Yeah this is much while this is all this is more than it's more sophisticated, a little less all over the shop. I don't mind Trump. I just think

the tariffs are not of a terribly effective economic model. I was talking this morning to Holly about that, my wife, Holly. Holly Valiennes. Third wife. Holly Valens. And saying Holly Valens, my wife, don't throw him out entirely.

Oh no, she wouldn't. She loves him. Tell us about your hat. Oh, yes, I'm wearing a hat because I presumed that I'd be playing Jack Dane for the entire day of recording, of course. We are recording three. I think we can be open about that now. We're banking three today.

And sorry to ruin the... I know that's a bit of a running joke, but we can pretend. Let's imagine that we're recording three today. And I didn't put product in my hair because I presumed I'd be playing Jack. Did you put product of your hair? Well, I presumed I'd be playing Jack

or do I put product in my hair? Yes, I put a cream that's designed to add a little bit of curl and help with separation, and then just a touch of an oil, just to give it a bit of shine, and just get rid of that sort of awfully fluffy look. Now, I know it doesn't look like that very often. I'm not good at drying at that sort of thing. We shoot in the summer months. You're not good at drying it.

No, I just, you know, we shoot in the summer months, so it's often quite sweaty. But let me tell you. Let me tell you. I was quite nervous coming back here today. I was quite nervous. I was worried. I was worried, you know, I'd left some of my more comedic instincts behind.

But I think, you know what? I think we'll probably be here for a few more weeks at least before we were replaced by our next, by the new heist of the Auntie Donna podcast. But I think I've had a terribly wonderful time. It's been so lovely to reconnect with you both. I haven't seen you out of the office for years. Good to just shoot the shit.

Yes. If we want to be crass about it. I just did have a general discourse and conversation. He's having fun. I know, I know. It's all right. I need to loosen up. It's all right to talk about shooting the shit from time to time.

I remember when you used to talk about, coming across. So are we talking the gentlemen's club, the Melbourne Club? Yes. There's an ad birthday party for my 50th and a hundred men come. Yes, and we got those two boys to box. Yes, they were four. We bet on the boxes and it was good fun.

Well, that's another episode of the Antit-Donna podcast. Thank you for listening. Brought to you by Harrods. Consider your next tea event. And Harrods, Zachary, thank you for joining me for the quiz. Oh, no, and thank you for the idea of the quiz. I thought that was a wonderful. Did we discover who won?

Oh, no. Yeah, I won the quiz. Congratulations, Tom. You won the quiz. If you could talk. What were the scores? I got five. And I only joined halfway through too.

Mark got four and Zach got three. And he held his tongue at times. Oh, listen, you should talk to Stephanie. She'll arrange the transfer. You deserve it. Thank you. I'm going to order Dominoes to celebrate. And enjoy that night with your wife, Dawn.

We thank you so greatly for listening to this improvisational podcast. Produced by Tom Zaharillo and Lucy Bain for the BBC. Thank you to, it was produced by the team at Haven't You Dunwell Productions and Grasshouse. It's available online in the BBC app as well as on BBC online. It was nine produced by Patricia Cavalas and, Patricia Patricia Cavalas and is available

internationally through the BBC app Have a wonderful day At the top of the hour Good evening Mind the gap Mind the gap What's that

Causters upon Avon Oh yes Yes Thank you Yes thank you Gaps are just good to mind You are too much Auntie Donna

You've been listening To The Ante Thanks for joining us for another Ripper episode brought to you by Auntie Donna Club.com. See you next week. Welcome to the future.