Bachelor Happy Hour - Andrew S. Talks Family Ties to Bachelor Nation and Apologizes for Past Tweets

Episode Date: August 3, 2021

“The Bachelorette” Season 17 fan favorite Andrew S. speaks in depth about tweets that resurfaced from his past and his difficulty adjusting to public scrutiny on social media. Andrew also opens up about his involvement in the drama on the show and shares why he didn’t want to involve Katie. Plus, Andrew explains the note he left Katie after their breakup and reveals whether he would ever be interested in becoming the Bachelor.  Then, Becca and Tayshia discuss Katie and Greg’s gut-wrenching breakup.  “Bachelor Happy Hour” has exclusive interviews every week. Watch “The Bachelorette” on ABC and listen to “Bachelor Happy Hour the next morning.   Don’t forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly, and now I'm seriously suspicious. Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, luckily, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast, so we'll find out soon. This person writes, my boyfriend's been hanging out with his young professor a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone.

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I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. avoidance is easier, ignoring is easier, denial is easier, complex problem solving, takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back, Happy Hour listeners. Thank you for joining us another week. And thank you to my incredible co-host, Tisha, for joining me again, girl. Of course. And we have so much to talk about today because this last episode was, a doozy.

I like there wasn't even that much to talk about other than Greg though. Here's the thing like a lot went down but it was really only with one person which I will say is unfortunate because it's hometowns and we obviously met several families who were incredible but a lot of the episode and the drama and the conversation was centric around Greg which we will get into but before that i just want to announce that we have a great guest coming on today somebody that you have all asked for for a while now and that is mr andrew s who will be joining us very shortly um butatia yes let's get into last night because uh you know you were there you were part of this hometown week which was a little bit different than usual because

instead of meeting four families, we only met three. And most of the first two seemed pretty straightforward, correct? How was she feeling this week? You know, this week she was pretty nervous. And I think that we had that conversation right before her going into hometowns. And it's just because it's no longer just you and the guy. It's also involving their families now. And so it just kind of really puts things into perspective and makes it more of a reality.

like, okay, if we do walk away together, this is going to be my potential new family. So at that point, I think she was really nervous and she just wanted to make the right decision and have the right guys there. After having Blake and Justin's hometown, I think she thought it went great. I think she was very excited to meet Greg's family.

And I'm not going to lie. Being there, the reason why I say it was such a doozy, though, but being there this week was very, very heavy. Katie was coming off of a lot of breakups and she was starting to get nervous like if this is really going to work for her. She had some great guys left, but it was just like, okay, what if somebody else leaves or what if I don't feel it once I meet their family or you know what I mean? There was so much going

through her mind. So it was just, it was really tough. It was really tough for her. Well, it's so much more heightened. This week is when, as you said, shit gets really, really real because you start to realize. okay it's not just going to be me and this one person at the end of this. It's going to be families that are going to one day be combined. And when you ultimately get married, you don't just marry that one person you marry into the families. And so I think she took it so seriously. And it just adds this added layer of pressure because once you meet the family and you see how much they love their sons, it's like no one wants to hurt any of the sons, but that's what's about to happen. And so

it's a lot let me ask you this because i just want to get into the gregg stuff because he always since night one he got the first impression rose he was always a front runner he was always somebody that i think we all could see would be there till the end yeah and we have to just get into this conversation between the two of them after she met his you know had that conversation with his mom and he sat down with her and he really opened up a lot about how he has never been this vulnerable. He's never felt this way like he's falling in love. Then we see a switch and it seems like I'm missing something like that first initial conversation that they had that something seems to be off because what we see is Greg being so open and Katie at least for me

as a viewer, this seems like the first time really that she was at a loss for words where she really didn't have. Yeah. Like she usually she has incredible responses that are very present with the men. You know, she's able to read the room and read the vibe with anyone she's interacting with. And this was the first time where I as a viewer felt like, Katie, what's going on? Like knock, knock, knock what's happening? And that's where I'm wondering and, you know, obviously I'm sure that conversation went much longer than what we saw but the moment where Greg finishes opening up to her and her response was I like looking at you I was like oh shit this is going to not go well after this um it just I and and here's the thing like Katie

it did not seem like katie and that's and he noticed that obviously he addressed that and called her out on that the next day when he went to go talk with her but it's interesting to see it because we've all been well not we've all tasha you and i have been kind of where he is um as a contestant dating the lead and we have so many emotions and feelings and we really want to get to this next level with the person we're dating but then we can understand it from katie's point of view as the bachelorette and coming from a former lead who i said i'm not going to tell any guy that i love them or that i'm falling in love with them until the last day when it's just one man standing i could kind of relate to her too where i think in her mind she had so much more she wanted to say but she was really really holding back

because i think in her mind she's like just be patient with me like just give me two more weeks Greg like we will get there like I feel so confident in us she didn't obviously say that which maybe she should have and maybe things would have gone a little bit differently but it was such a strange conversation and I feel like we missed so much and I'm just sitting there like Katie I know say anything give him anything I think this is where you know she had that cardinal rule like I'm not going to tell anybody I love them until the final day and it's just because she doesn't want anyone to feel but why couldn't she tell him that this is the thing i don't know and i think that obviously it took a lot for gregg to be vulnerable and i think that like you had just

said as a viewer kitty has been so you know meaningful with all of her words her responses are amazing and the validation that she gives and and she always has the right thing to say because it's heartfelt and it's real however in this moment i think he was actually searching for that i don't know if he was necessarily searching for I love you or I'm falling in love with you as well. But I think he was searching for anything. Katie's words. You know what I mean? He was waiting for that response and he didn't get that. And that's even what he said. He's like, I'm not looking for you to tell me you love me right now. I'm just looking for anything that's not robotic. And so it was, I mean, I can see both sides so I can feel for both of them. Absolutely. And I understand, again, like, I,

I was in Katie's position, I was the one who was like, I can't say those words until it's one man left. So I completely understand that. But I think in that moment, because he's gone through a little bit more and I think has shared a little bit more about his background and his story and where he's at, you know, especially with his father passing away and kind of how that's changed him as a man. I think she could have given him more validation than she did. And without saying I love you or I'm falling in love with you, but even just to explain things more of like, look, like anything, whatever it would have been, but I think it would have been okay for her to be like, I have all of these feelings for you right now and I don't want to have

word vomit and say anything that is disrespectful to anyone else and that's too much. And I'm waiting to reserve these words or the sentiment for one man at the end. And I just hope that you can respect that but yeah it just i felt it was kind i i felt torn watching it and then god the moment though that got me is this is the next day when grig goes back and talks to her this is the first time where we really see him question her where he really which i appreciated he kind of held her feet to the fire and didn't just let it go and didn't just say okay you know i feel confident in us and he actually got to this point place, I think, in his head where he's like, if you can't give me what I'm asking for right now

in this moment, I have to remove myself. God, in the moment when she went and ran after him and found him, I don't even know how she found him. He was, he was hiding. But the moment where they were kind of going back and forth and, I don't want to say yelling at each other, but like having this heated conversation. And then when he just left her on the cold ground and walks away, I was just like, oh shit. Yeah, shit just hit the fans. This is, well, this is what we've seen in the teasers where she's like, I'm done. I want a plane ticket home and I've been waiting for, I was like, what causes her to get to

this point? Like, what is it going to be in it? It was great. There are so many twists and turns and Katie doesn't even know what the hell is, like, around the next corner. It is insane. Yeah, there's a lot that we, I hope, have left to see. I mean, at the end of the day, it ends.

Caitlin goes to the bathroom. has this chat with her and she says that she wants an airplane ticket home. So does Katie get that airplane ticket and go home or does she continue to find love? We will have to wait to find out. And I'm telling you, I am at the edge of my seat right now because I truly have no idea about what is to happen. So, um, Tisha, we just have to bring on our guests right now. The man of the hour, again, we didn't see him go home this week, but somebody that we've been wanting to chat with for a while. So without further ado, please welcome Andrew S, everybody.

Welcome to Bachelor Happy Hour. You've been somebody we would want to talk to you for quite some time. I was kind of getting scared that no one wanted to talk to. They were actually like, we'll pay you guys extra if you interview Andrew because. I just kept seeing

everyone get to go on. I was like, what's going on? Is something wrong with me? I didn't know what's going on. No, nothing. Well, hopefully nothing's wrong with you. But we're excited to have you. You've been somebody that all of our followers and listeners have been wanting us in chat with so thank you for joining us today um so before we started recording you mentioned that you literally just got off of a flight from austria correct yeah i did uh 10 hours

um so it's been brutal uh and then i came straight into um hanging out with everyone else i've been gone since february um and i went to the show so i was just like i have no family contact no friend contact so um i'm on i'm like limbs right now just try to stay awake and you around everyone okay well well this will be fun we won't keep you for too too long because we know that you're busy and obviously we would want you to catch up with your friends and your family which we will get into very shortly because we have a lot to cover with the family um but before we start today I'm just going to address the elephant in the room obviously I'm sure hopefully it's something that you want to address as well and just kind of nip it in the bud

here but there were some tweets from years ago that had recently resurfaced that you obviously they had typed out and posted. So I'm going to leave the floor for you briefly to address that to say anything that you want to say and then we'll get into the rest of the interview. Yeah, you know, like I'm super sad and then, you know, embarrassed that those tweets came up. You know, definitely not the person who I am today. It was like a young, childish, immature. And that's exactly what those tweets were just super immature.

And, you know, I've lived overseas the last three years, you know, obviously I've seen different things and been around different cultures and people. So I'm a different person completely. And, you know, I just, I just want to make sure that everyone knows that in my heart, I don't really ever go out to try to, you know, make someone feel bad. And, you know, I've grown so much and, you know, and I've always been super positive. You know, I just got caught, caught up in a moment trying to, you know, have some attention, create some laughs, I think.

That, you know, it was a little bit too much. at the top. And, you know, I apologize for that. But at the end of the day, you know, you know, I own it and, you know, I'm not going to shy away from it. And, you know, that's just who I am. It's a part of me, part of my past. And I just look, I'm looking forward to moving forward. I stay in the present. And like I said, I wanted to stay positive as possible. A lot of people were kind of worried why I haven't said anything about this piece. And I don't like to dwell on negative, negative moments, negative things in my life so I'm positively just keep moving forward and hopefully nothing like this ever comes up again

and I hope that people know my character by seeing me talk and being around me because that's really important I take it really to heart you know see who the man I've become and the way I act and you know our interactions secondly I've been getting like this hate or not loving you know black people are self-love, black women. That's false. I love black women. I've been actively dating black women since I can remember. And I just want to shut that down because that's ridiculous. And that's very hurtful to me because, you know, I do take a lot of pride in you know, my community and just, you know, my upbringing. And I said black women in general, you know, I'm raised from a single black woman, my sisters, my cousins, and, you know,

You know, I've seen how black women may be treated differently in the eye of, you know, America. And that's definitely not something I, you know, choose to shy away from. I definitely want to support black women in me and everything. And I'm definitely looking for black love as well. So I'm not like some guy that just only dates one person. I've dated multiple different races, especially living overseas, you know. So I just wanted to clear there on that. And that's pretty much all that.

let me ask you this because i'm sure being in the position that you are in um not only being on this show and having the platform now but you obviously you know you're an athlete and i'm sure you have many younger kids especially male male younger men um looking up to you and is there anything going through all of this now and having all of these tweets resurface and having people you know think one way about you any advice that you could give to the younger generation that perhaps look up to you or that you know find so much value within social media anything that you've learned that you could give advice to them about i mean obviously now be conscious of what you tweet um even though uh you might not think anyone's watching there's always

someone's going to someone's watching it's always going to affect the future but at the same time don't compromise who you are like i'm not going to compromise myself because people who are wanting me to do this, I want to do that. Like, I'm, I'm apologizing because I feel like it's necessary and in a way that I still get to be myself. I don't want anyone to feel like they're forcing me to do something. Like, I don't need to apologize. Like, I want to.

And I just want to make sure that everyone just stays themselves and, you know, don't get into their heads about it. You know, I think talking with some of the guys, like, it's really tough for them, dealing with the social media and people coming after them. and you know just it's really tough to just you know just remain yourself because you want to you want to please everybody but at the same time you can't please everyone so that's just been the main thing for me let me ask you this because there's one tweet in particular that you stated something about wanting to be the bachelor so when all of the stuff in the house is going around with the guys and thomas about being bachelor was there any part of you that was like shit i hope no one finds out about this shocked to see that tweet I definitely think I was just some young 18-year-old who saw the show the guy with 30 girls and was like, oh, I want to be the bachelor.

I don't think there's any logic behind any of that besides just me being, you know, an arrogant, you know, dumb, dumb kid. I think it's hilarious that that even is a thing. That was not any of my intentions going on in the show at all. But I think that was really funny that that was one of the tweets that problem. I mean, look, here's the thing. I'm Tasha and I've talked about this. It's something that crosses people's minds, I think, more often than anyone's willing to admit. And so...

I don't think we thought, and I can vouch for all the guys in the house. I don't think anyone really wants to be the bachelor. I would say more so they just want to be a part of the show and be a part of the experience. Oh, wait. people want to be the bachelor and people want to be the bachelorette i promise i don't know about that i wouldn't say i want it to be i would say i live a life where i like to get i like to do different things and experience different things so for me going on the show it's like oh i get the experience this and not a lot of people can say that they have and on top of that like i've always wanted to

you know find a girl whatever so why not take you know you already know right off the jump that they're going to give you a really good girl So at the end of the day, if I figure it out and try to be the best off and try to win her. And also just show myself, someone viewing can be like, oh, dang, I want that guy. And then that's, you know, it's just, it's bigger than that. I don't think anyone was just really thinking about becoming the bachelor. I know I wasn't. That's for sure.

Okay. Well, Andrew, if it was ever offered to you, what would you say? After, like, knowing all the stuff that comes with it, Probably no. You heard it from him first, ladies and jens. Wow. I just, you know, I would love the chance to find, you know, a girl through that process. I love that.

But I don't, I hate everything that comes with it. Like, I hate, you know, people deep diving into my life. You know, I made a mistake when I was younger. And I got like a DUI or whatever. And the first thing that hits the tip of papers is that. And I have like a 10-year-old nephew and she got her. And he's, like, loving, you know, the fame. Like, oh, my uncle's famous, whatever.

And he goes and Googles me every once in a while. And then he Googled me, and he sends him the tax and it's like, hey, uncle, were you ever arrested? Like, where's this coming from? And I didn't know that that someone posted that already. And, you know, that's really tough for me to explain to my 10-year-old nephew that, you know, I was an idiot at some point. And, you know, like, and then they had to learn that way without me at least giving a lesson or, like, you know, me talking to him personally. And so I hate that aspect of it. I hate.

Yeah, I just, that's just not me. That's not who I am. I'm always been a positive person. And I feel like in this light now, a day and age with the show is people are starting to look for the negative stuff and not really focusing on the positive things that people are doing. And like, to me, like, that's just, you know, it's like a turnoff to me. Yeah, a lot comes with, you know, the quote unquote fame or, um,

the spotlight for a minute. It's something we've all gone through and it's definitely not fun. Yeah. And I think like to play off of Andrew what you were saying when you first I'm sure signed up or were approached, however you got on to be on the show, you looked at it in the way

of like, this is going to be fun. I have this experience that you know 25 to 30 people get to do each year and you know in the past we were able to travel. There was so much positive incentive to it where you know you're going to date somebody great you're probably going to form a lot of friendships from it like you look at the bright side of

things and i don't think people who now go on the show realize like how heavy and deep and dark you can actually be like people going into your paths and it's super dark it's a lot harder and i think the best thing is like you guys we always talk about the bromance but literally if it wasn't for the guys and talking every single day after shows and seen tweets you know what i can i can 100% say i don't know how like I would be you know mentally because right you know you see everything you know people post you'll pop up you know it's like you can't just not see it so I think you know us just banding together and having each other's back um is great and then you guys you know being the leads I don't know who you really lead on lean on for that you know what I mean so like it's super

hard to really just because not everyone knows what you're going through and you know I don't know how Katie did it. I feel like she gets a lot of flag. And, you know, just making sure, I just, I just hope she's doing well and has someone to, you know, lean on when people are saying these things and whatever. So yeah, I mean, it's definitely tough. I love everything about the, like, I love the Bachelor process. I just, I think the fans are killing me a little bit right now. They can be a little too much at times. Like, it's nice. It's definitely the support is amazing however when every single move is criticized it's just like they always say that you know we have an unrealistic viewpoint for love or whatever but the unrealistic like they put on us

expectations it's crazy yeah yeah it is it's definitely much harder I think coming out of any season than people realize and that's why I think we always say like and I hate to use this phrase but give people grace. Like, we're all humans at the end of the day. Like, there's not really a rule book for this process and for being on a TV show to go from, you know, a random nobody. Not even a nobody, but just, you know, like your typical person to go and then being thrust.

The next thing you know is it's all coming in. You got to love, taking a love. And then obviously there's going to be negative comments. That's fine. But like some of the negative comments are just like, it's next level. And people are like, when you signed up for this? And you're like, okay, I did.

But not that. You can't expect it. Because, you know, I get this, you know, platform or this, you know, ability to have this kind of fame, if you want to call it. Doesn't even the ability to just kind of shun. The level of criticism is outrageous. Yeah. I sign up for love not to be criticized.

Yes. I'm not a politician. Like, you know, I didn't sign up to like. That's what you sign up for. If not is different. For love. The good thing that, you know, not that it's easy, but somebody is always doing something in a day or a week to take the pressure off of you. There's always something going on in Bustra Nation.

So I know it probably seems hard right now. I promise you, it will get easier. And you just kind of ride the way of a bit. I love the interactions with people. And obviously, Mike P just had an interaction that was amazing. And so like there's really good stuff that comes with being a bachelor or being on a bachelor or whatever. Mike P.

Oh, yeah. So someone reached out to him. She was struggling with cancer and she wanted to talk to Mike P. Mike P. talked to her. And it was a really beautiful moment. He posted it on his Instagram and I got to briefly talk to her, a little shared a message with her. So honestly, like there's just so much beauty that comes out of it. but I don't want to focus on the negatives

because that's just like I said, that's the stuff that I love. Right. Well, okay, we'll get away from the heavy stuff right now. We want to get into the more fun, exciting because obviously we saw you night one come out of the limo, which I will say this.

I'm kind of bummed that you didn't come on the podcast like you did night one with the accent. I've been getting a lot of flack. People say I use it too much. Really? Honestly. I liked it. Really?

This is where you do. need to stop listening to people. I promise you. He's doing it again. I'm like, oh, God. They're just jealous because they can't do it and they don't do it as well as you do. You were there, Tasha. Yeah. I'm disappointed that they didn't play my proposal.

Yeah, that's the one. I thought that was my best right there. It was next level. I was like, I'm sorry. Caitlin and I were looking at each other like, the hell? Guys better learn how to have an accent tomorrow.

It just hits in a totally different way. Okay, so I don't know how long you've been doing the accent for, but obviously you, okay, do you currently, I know that you did in the past, but do you currently live in Vienna? Yes. Okay. So the last three years, I've spent half my time in Vienna and half my time in the States. Gotcha. So I originally was trying to come out and speak German. German is just not the sexiest language in the world.

So I had to switch You would be like, are you yelling at me? What is going on? I mean, like, I have like one of these tournaments like, do Oshuna Allegan? And that means like you have beautiful eyes that I was going to do. And they're just like,

there's not really anything that I'm sorry, what? So I was just like, you know what? I can do a British accent and that went way better. Was it moving to Austria a huge culture shock for you? I mean, I don't even know. anyone that lives out there aside from you which I just met you

so it's not very often that I meet someone that's in Austria you know and my family we just never really went anywhere because of a box so it's like you know your cousins who live maybe in South Carolina and you just go back like that was

our vacation I was like all right fine and then now I go to start flying over the world and like my family's like well now I want to travel So, but it was definitely a culture shock, you know, obviously walking around and people don't speak English, trying to figure it out. That's actually one of my favorite things, though. And my phone's always dead. So like walking around, you just kind of have to figure it out and just kind of ask questions. And you get to interact with people. So that's when I started to love being there when my phone would die and just be able to, you know, figure it out. Just being in a different country. it was super cool and wait one last thing you're with team members right or were you by yourself when you first moved um you have one other import so there's like okay and the rest are just all austrian so you just really just learn language pretty good english uh there's just a time when they just

start going off in german you're just like figure out what they're saying that's so cool i've downloaded dual lingo so i mean i i do a little bit of german speaking but it's not very good um okay before we get into this season so you obviously just mentioned family you know they want to start traveling more with you but there is something that we can't miss because you have a connection in bachelor nation in the family and so which i feel like we're coming full circle now because it was a guy for my season so one of my ex-boyfriends is Andrew's cousin to all of our listeners if you don't remember mr clay harbor who was on my season, did he kind of get your foot in the door with this show? Or how did, like, did he

give you advice? Like, give me all the background between the two of you. Yeah. Um, you know, he likes to take credit for everything. Of course he does. Of course he does. We really did nothing. I mean, him and a group of his friends, um, that are also on The Bachelor, I got to, you know, know them. I started living with Clay when, um, I'd come back from Austin Street. I was like, hey, yeah, for a while. Like, him and a lot. Like, getting my own place, like, can I stay with you? And then we became, like, best friend. And then I started hanging out with, like, Joe and Dustin.

So it's honestly, like, a group effort. Those guys are like, you need to be on the show. And I was like, I don't know. And then, like, they put my name in. And then I got a call. And it's like, did you want to be in the show? I was like, oh, this is really. This is real.

And I was like, yeah, we'll go through the process. I know the fact that you're friends with Joe. I love it. Yeah, I saw that you and Joe were together. I'm like, oh, Joe, he's just the best. I'm glad that it's nice, though, that you have people from this world that have already gone through with that are close to you, that you already have some sort of friendship with before that you can lean on because, yeah. Yeah, like going back to what we were saying earlier, it's a scary, crazy world that you just really can't plan for. So I'm glad that you have them all there.

Getting into the season, night one, you come out of the limo, you have the accent. Did you feel an instant connection with Katie fresh out of the gate? Well, I mean, I knew from like, why. watching, you know, watching back or watching whatever thing was that we were going to head it off. I felt like she had a very exuberant, you know, personality, and that's who I am. I come with energy, and that's just, that's just like, you know, at the end of the day, if, you know, I don't say something right or, you know, make the right moves, as long as I'm smiling and bring good energy, we're going to, we're going to be okay.

So, like, that's kind of what it was. I'm super nervous that night, though. I'm not going to lie to you. And it was really cold. So I was really nervous about how my execution was going to go with my Bruce accent. But, you know, I knew right away that, you know, we would connect on a, you know, a very good level. You were on a bunch of, yeah, I think, well, that, didn't you say, I don't know, you, like, held her hands when you were up there with her. And I remember her saying, like, you guys, like, connected in that moment.

Yeah, I just probably stayed there. It was, uh, I don't know. I feel like every single time we're with each other, it felt just like us. Like, you know what I mean? You know, obviously you kind of become like a little bit different just to, you know, kind of eat yourself into people. I don't think we ever had to do that. We were just, you know, 100% us the whole time.

So it was that she made it easier for me. And I feel like, you know, I kind of made it easier for her. You seemed more comfortable with each other than it felt like she was with some guys. And maybe that's because you were charming. you were kind of funny with the accent and then you stopped the accent she's like wait what who's this man but it was a good icebreaker

we didn't see you get a one-on-one date for a while we obviously saw you go through a few group dates before that coveted one-on-one out of all those group dates what one was your favorite out of the group dates I don't know oh the painting one for sure

way in the end painting one was hilarious. I think that was probably one of the funnest days. Obviously, Blake's comments to self-portrait, probably still one of the funniest things. I don't know, like I said, coming on the show, I just wanted to experience everything and do everything 100% full.

And obviously, you know, when Katie came out and doubled down on it, she was like, take this seriously, do this. Like, I went to every group date, like, having fun. You know, and I knew, like, at the end of the day, like, if I'm going to be dating this girl, like, we're going to have to be around other people. We got to be able to, you know, interact with other people and, you know, still kind of have affection with each other as well. Because, you know, I have a lot of friends that I love to be around and I want, you know, my girl to be around me as well with my friends. So I took, I was having a ball. Like every, every, every, every date that we went to, you know, I was just having so much fun and I just was just present.

and that's i think that i think she noticed that a little bit as well um like i wasn't really just like super sad that she was talking to someone else you know um okay going into the group dates there was one moment where it probably wasn't ideal for you where it wasn't all fun and laughs and that is when you and trey kind of went head to head and had differing views and opinions on how everything with katy should be approached looking back now are you glad that you you stood firm. Do you wish you would have handled things differently? Wait, before you answer this question, I have to say this, like, argument was probably the first one that I've actually seen on, I don't know, on the show where I was like, I can actually see both

sides. And I don't know what's best, which one I would appreciate more. Like, as the lead, I really Oh, Tisha and I have had this conversation. And we know. And I can, I can, I can break it down right now. I mean, I need it because, like, I feel like I can go both ways. So, please. Looking at it from my point of view, I didn't see anything that was, you know, important enough for her to be told. Obviously, with the Thomas thing, like, he literally cleared the air in front of everyone. He told her the red flags.

At that point, I was like, well, she knows everything she needs to know. That's her decision to make. And they were, like, talking about their relationship. with Thomas about how, you know, he went back on a lie. I'm like, he doesn't have to tell you anything. Like, he could lie to you all he wants. He's not here for you. You know what I mean? And I was like, and I'm such a non-drama guy when it comes to us. I hate it. Like, I hate that kind of crap and I hate like having to talk about it. Right. Like in person, I was just like, can we be done? Like, and you know I'm from Chicago. So we don't, we don't talk about anyone else's

like personal. You stay in your own lane. And I was, uh, I was. getting a little frustrated with because, you know, people were losing time. And I was like, if I lose time, I'm going to be real pissed. And I'm like, she already made it clear that she's got like a no, she's got, she's not fucking around. So like she means business. And I was like, all right, well, why are we doing this knowing that she will shut it down? And like, we have a short amount of time, you know, to make this a real thing. And that's, that was the only thing I was on my mind. And I think the guys were, it kind of got to like a voting off the island thing. And I was just like not having that.

It didn't matter about me and Thomas' relationship. We weren't close. Like I never really even talked to him at all. But at this point, I was just like, if you go and, you know, tell on him, someone's going to lose time. And that can be going home. Like, and that's what I was trying to focus on. And they had other agendas.

Did it seem like when you and Trevor were having this conversation? because it was on the group date that the evening portion and other men were around you both. Did it seem like any of the guys were taking one side or over the other? Oh, it was? Oh, and I'm

I don't care. Like, I'm going to be me. I'm going to be 1,000% me. Like, I'm not going to compromise who I am to fit in this group or this click. You know what I mean? Like, I don't care. I was just like, hey, I know that someone's going to go home at the end of this. I don't want it to be me yet.

And I want to have every single second that I can to make an impact on this woman to maybe create something, you know, after the show or whatever. So I wasn't going to, you know, compromise that at all. Yeah. Well, at this point, if everyone is against you and saying like, oh, Katie deserves to know, they're all obviously going to go tell her.

So you could just kind of sit back and be like, she's going to know and I wouldn't enjoy my time with her. Exactly. And I know a lot of the guys who went home, We're pissed because they didn't get time. And it was like, this is what you guys asked for. And we even came up with a proposal for, you know, Thomas to go and talk to her in front of us, you know, like confess.

I'm like, that's way better. Like, all right, we're all in the same room. We got our time. Thomas confess, you know, we got you. There's nothing else you can do. Like, and then he goes and does this little thing. And now everything's messed up. So I was just like, are you?

usually this cool as a cucumber or is this advice Mr. Clay Harbor and Joe Amad? I was giving you. You got so much credit. I mean, I'm just trying to crack the coach. But you didn't have Clay and Joe on the season.

They weren't there. No, I know, but I'm just asking. I still talked in a lot. They went home the first two weeks. Damn. No, Joe went home after two hours, okay? I don't think they're right. You probably shouldn't take any advice from that.

I will say, though, Joe gives some of the best, most solid advice. You know, even though he was only around for 24 hours on my season, I would take Joe's advice over so many people. Do what you want to do. Just screw it. At the end of the day, who cares? I mean, what do you want? What do you want?

What do you want? You know, that guy. That guy. Yeah, this is my hands. I love Joe. I love him. Okay, I'm sorry. Moving on.

His head's going to get so big that we were talking about him. I hate it. Why are we talking about Joe so much on this podcast? He deserves it. Anyway. Okay, moving on from the drama that we saw between you and Trey that night. Finally, you get the one on one date and it was interesting going in because you were always somebody that again she seems

so comfortable with into but she did mention she needs more like it seemed like there was that friendship that was there but she needed more maybe passion if you will which we did see happen on that date obviously we saw you open up a lot more that evening um you guys had a really really great conversation how did you feel overall about that entire day with her I think it had a little bit of everything, and that's what I wanted to be able to show her, like, that's, that's every day dating me. Like, we're going to be having laughs, we're going to have serious conversations, we're going to have romance. And that's exactly what I wanted out of that date. You know, the conversations and the way she reacted to him, that was all her.

You know, it was just, I put it on the table, and she just ran away with it completely. So I think the answers to the discussions and, you know, the reactions is what really made the date goes so well. And I wouldn't take any credit for that as well. I think she really killed it. And, you know, I just was just there to see how she was going to react. You know, it's like dating. It's literally like going on a date and, you know, treating. Like I just created everything so real and so natural.

because that's how I wanted it to if we're going to get married after this like I want it to know this is what the life is going to be every day so you know I loved our one-on-one date and I definitely think it really took off from there for sure it was a fun

it was a cute date I actually loved that date the envelopes hanging from the trees was like the cutest thing and then the balloon The balloon room and the lovely lights. No, I think I won the date.

I was a little bit nervous because my date didn't start for a while. I was really nervous about that. But no, I think I had the best date out of all the guys, all the one of want. Maybe the doom buggy might have been the better one. I have a question. I have a question. One day, Andrew, you'll get the doom buggy. Okay, so it was so interesting because when you ended up going to,

home. I did not see that coming. I, okay, I'm going to, I will be honest, I thought you were top three for the longest time. And so when everything played out, I was like, wait, are you sure she meant to say Andrew, didn't say Andrews saying for that reason? Because I thought you were sticking around. And that goodbye was gut wrenching. The next day we see you go in and you have this extra time, this special moment with Katie, you decide to give her that letter. What originally drew you to do that for her. And first I want to defend Katie. I don't think you guys, most people

heard within like our sit down right before I left. She explains that she didn't want to, you know, meet my mother and my sister and, you know, knowing that she has stronger relationship with other people. Like, if you really think about it, I don't want to say anything against any other guy, but it's like, she already knew

that it wouldn't go that far. Like, why I put my family through that and myself through that? So I thought it was kind of like really, you know, shoulderist that she you know, would think of me that far ahead and, you know, kind of just like, hey, you know, I don't want to put you through even more, like drag you through this. But I know there's something there, but it's just, you know, I know there's other people with strong relationships.

And, you know, I really respected that. Like I said, Katie and I have just like a real, real connection. We can just be straightforward with each other all the time. But the note, yeah, that was, like I, like, I, like, I, like, Like her running down, barefooted, down the stairwell, like, probably one of the most breathtaking moments in my life. I had no idea that was happening. You know, when I wrote the letter or the note, I was definitely talking about after a show. So it's like, hey, you know, you don't find your man here.

I can definitely be open to, you know, trying this again, you know. It's already easy. You know, we know each other's heart. We know each other. It just makes sense. you know what i mean um then starting all the way over with someone else that you know what i mean like it'd be like a shortcut right so i was like i'd definitely be down for that um you know and a lot of people were a little bit confused by it but uh no that's 1,000% what i meant and you know

i just couldn't do the show you know i mean like go one more row ceremony like for what just gets sent home again like you know go to fantasy speech for what you know i i think of it a little bit more. Well, I'll tell you why the fantasy sweets. I didn't want to, you know, go through that. But, you know, I just, you know, I wanted to stay true myself as well and, you know, kind of respect my, you know, I wasn't chosen. And that's fine. Wait. Okay. I need to say this because you said something in that last moment that I loved. Why? And I don't want to botch exactly what you said. but it was along the lines of, well, you know, I want to be chosen.

And in this moment, I don't feel chosen. And so that's why I had to say no, which I thought was so beautiful. And I know, I will say this. I think a lot of the viewers were confused because they saw you give that note to her of, you know, in the future. But like, it really like chose me. You know what I mean? She was like, all right, let's leave. Let's leave.

Right. All right. You know what I mean? But that wasn't the case. It was come back on the show. I was like, you know, no, I can't do that. I was really done with New Mexico. I was ready to get out of there. I was ready to get out of there. I was like, get me home now to leave. You get in that black car and the tears are, I'm like, I need to go. Yeah, getting out of here. But I actually really liked how you handled it. Because I feel like it would have been so easy for almost anyone if the lead was running after them and saying like, do you want to stay? To be like, okay, yeah, like, let's just stick around and still see. And so I actually liked in that moment.

If I told you, I didn't go through that before, you know, I've been in that situation where I went back to that X, you know what I mean? And, you know, it just was like, oh, you know, we all have. We've all been there. You know what I mean? So I've had that kind of heartbreak and I understand like, all right, when the call quits, when it's done or you know what I mean, when you can read spark it. You know what I mean? So in that moment, it was not a good time for me. There was no way that, you know, without even.

thinking in the back of my head that, you know, you just sent me home that I was going to be, you know, capable to, you know, just kind of move past that on the show. And, you know, just knowing that her connection with Greg and, you know, and Blake was just so apparent. Yeah. So I knew that I, you know, I couldn't really, I couldn't win there. So I was just, you know, I was okay with it. And I'm okay. It's okay to not be chosen. You don't have, like, the world's not over, you know. It just means you're going to find the right one sooner. You know, that just wasn't a person for you at the time. So, you know, I've gotten really good with, you know,

breakups. I know how to end them on good notes. I'm not a, you know, crazy ex-boyfriend or anything by any measures. And I don't want to have a crazy ex-girlfriend. So I want to make sure that if that is one of the things that happens, that we're cool. Quote on the podcast, everyone. We'll make sure we're still cool.

Yeah. No, I appreciate that. So speaking of cool, we saw you at Mental All, you seemed great with all the guys. It seemed good with Katie. Obviously, Tasha was there to host it. And again, it did a phenomenal job, girl. Oh, thank you. How was it being back there? Don't take my compliment.

No, honestly, you guys killed it. You guys. I wasn't there, so don't say you guys off. I had nothing to do with that. Caitlin and Tatia, you guys did in a phenomenal job. I think you guys were hilarious the whole time and super light. I thought you guys, I think that's what the show needed. I think the Bachelorette needs women.

Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's 100%. I do so do I. It was good. No, it was, it was great. And I think that we were both, I think we also can relate to you guys, too, being in those seats and revisiting all those fields.

feelings and all that kind of stuff. So it was really fun to be able to interview guys and talk to you guys and have the hot seat. So thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, no problem. How was being back with all the guys guys? Because that was the first time, obviously, since you sent by to Katie, since filming. So what was that like? You know, it was, you know, it's like you'd never lost a step, you know, and you just come back and it's right back in the place with the same guys and with Katie. You know, it was a little bit different scene, Katie, obviously, you know. Like I said, to break up on nothing but good and, you know, on extreme highs, it's weird. Yeah. Why did we just stop out of nowhere? So that was something that was really tough, just seeing her up there and she's glowing. So my prediction, she's probably married or engaged. Oh, my gosh. I was super nervous.

It's, I didn't know how to react. I saw her come out and she looked great. I was just like, oh, all right? Here we are again. Wait, did any old feelings get stirred up? And when you're in that moment where you see her again, absolutely, you're just like, oh, I remember her. It's been a while, but I remember you. I definitely remember you.

That's literally how it is, though. Everything comes rushing back. I mean, I know it's been like a little bit longer from. you know the show when it's last aired um but no i was it's like it comes fluttering back really fast do you feel like you got the closure that you needed with her um in talking to her or do you feel like you had that before coming to mental i think i definitely got the closure i needed um you know just from when we first left um to you know obviously having the time to stew on it and um you know like that little conversation that we had, you know, I just, you know that mutual respect is

there. That's, that's all I needed to know. And, you know, she's a good person. And I'm sure our paths will cross at some point and we'll get to hang out. And, you know, if I'm allowed around. I mean, I would definitely, you know, be able to hang out with her. That's for sure. I think we're going to be good friends for a while. Good. What is one of the things that you learned most? about yourself going through the season um i'm a i'm super dramatic you are oh my like like within like lovey-dovey ways i was just like god like you're out you're crying i didn't know that you know like the show like brings uh you know a certain man out of you or certain like an emotional you know sensitive that's what that's the sensitive i realized i was way more

sensitive than I thought I was. It brings it out of you. I'm not mad at that came out. You know, I feel so much better knowing that I can just be able to express my feelings now without, you know, having to think I have to be tough or, you know, thinking I'm a simp or something like that. That's what the word kids are using these days. I don't really care about that, you know.

I was able to, you know, be myself 100%. And, you know, if I like someone, I'm going to treat them like I like them. I'm going to say the things that I want to say. Because, you know, that's how I feel. I feel like now in the team days, like, people are afraid to say what they say is they don't want to be too much or they like him too much. It's just the weirdest thing in the world with me. And I feel like, you know, being on a show, I definitely figured out very sensitive and, you know, very in tune with my feelings. And I didn't think I was.

Well, I don't want to speak for all women out there, but most of us like that. we find it in a in a man a very attractive quality so I'm glad that you were able to get to that point and hopefully in the future just feel more comfortable opening up and sharing more of the emotions and the feelings because you know we we as women need to hear

that shit sometimes yeah no I'm I love that answer overall we ask all of our guests this before we kick you off but overall throughout the entire season and it can be while filming or just why watching it back. What was your thorn and what was your rose? My lo was definitely just being sent

home. That was probably the worst part of everything. Just real life heartbreak. I had to go straight to my hotel room. Like, God, this sucks. And then you sit there and, you know, kind of contemplate everything and just like, I can't believe I just went through all of this. And, you know, it's all done. So I think that was my love. I think, you know, just being sent home and having to have hard break, like, that sucks. I think the best part was being able to, you know, have friendships, like my two best friends now are, like, Justin and Greg, love them the death. And, you know, meeting the other guys. And, you know, obviously, forming a romance with Katie.

Like that, those are things that I love. And I had an absolute, you know, great time being on the show because of that. already Andrew it was so great having you on thank you so much for being here today it was this was great this was super fun thanks Andrew bye bye I'm glad that we were able to have him on I'm glad that he was able to address obviously some things that he probably didn't want to talk about but having this platform to kind of say any apologies and make amends and to move forward I think is always great for anyone so he's um he seems like such he's so chill and like just a sweetheart he like he keeps it right here but like he obviously has fun but he's just not too much

and he's not too little he's like the right amount he actually reminds me a lot of clay he reminds me a lot of clay he does like they're just very even tempered and maybe it's the athlete in them where obviously they both play football and they're used to like things being so extreme and heightened that when they're just in their daily life they just kind of you know like Yeah, chill out, but it was fun to have him on. I know he was somebody that a lot of our listeners wanted to hear from. Would you say, though, because I mean, you obviously know all of the guys living in New Mexico. Was he, like the Andrew that we see here today that we just remember you'd, was he the same guy that you saw on Katie season?

Oh, hands down. In fact, I always loved when we were hosting a date and he was there just because he just brought so much levity. and the guys were always laughing and giggling around him and so it just kind of made it more fun because like you know like even you saw even Greg like just getting in his head in the group date

situations and sometimes it takes a little bit for people to come out of their shell but when everybody's like kind of just like laughing and having good time like it really helps the situation so Andrew was definitely that one person that kind of just lifted everybody's spirits and was just super super super kind and sweet

and the accent got me every damn time. I mean, it's good. It was good. Yeah, it was definitely a fun soul to be around. Yeah, he seemed like he was good morale for the house. So I'm glad that we were able to have him on today. So huge thanks to Andrew and an even bigger thanks to all of our Bachelor Happy Hour listeners. We love you guys. And we just want to thank you for hanging in with us each and every week and being so incredible. If you don't follow us on social media, you can do so at Bachelor Happy Hour on Instagram and at Batch Nation Pods on both Facebook and Twitter. And as always, please don't forget to subscribe to our podcasts.

You can do that on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, The Wondery App, or wherever you're listening to us right now. Have a good one, everyone. Bye. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly, and now I'm seriously suspicious. Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, luckily, it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast.

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Welcome to Season 2 of The Good Stuff. Listen to the Good Stuff podcast on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy

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