Bachelor Happy Hour - Becca Speaks Out on Pieper & Brendan Drama; Alana Clears Up Her Relationship with Chris C.

Episode Date: September 8, 2021

This season of “Bachelor in Paradise” might be the most dramatic one in the show’s history, and this week host Becca Kufrin is sharing her thoughts on all the happenings at the beach. Becca spills on Joe and Kendall, why she asked Thomas on a date, and what she thinks about Brendan and Pieper coming to “Paradise” in a relationship. Plus, she shows some love for her bestie Natasha. Alana also joins to share her side of the story about her prior friendship with Chris C. and why she headed to the beaches of “Paradise.” “Bachelor Happy Hour” has exclusive interviews every week. Watch “Bachelor in Paradise” on ABC and listen to “Bachelor Happy Hour” the next morning. Don’t forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Hold up. Isn't that against school policy? That seems inappropriate. Maybe find out how it ends by listening to the OK Storytime podcast and the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials is easier.

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Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. Welcome back, Batcha Happy Hour listeners. I am so excited to be here again after another crazy week with you all.

Thank you for tuning in. And before we begin, I have to just say, unfortunately, Tia, who obviously has been my incredible sidekick throughout Paradise, cannot be joining today. She had some stuff up at home come up. So just send her some of your love, her way. And we will hopefully have her back on next week to do a fun recap. So in lieu of that, why not rope in all of you? Because I know that all of our listeners have some burning questions that you have been dying to ask us.

You write in each and every week. And so we've compiled a bit of those to kind of tie into this recap and get into some of the craziness that we sag go down in the past two nights because it was a lot. And before we begin, I have to say we have a guest coming on today who will hopefully be able to clear some things up. A huge narrative throughout this entire week was people being in relationships prior to coming on to the beaches of paradise. So we have Atlanta coming on very shortly to give her side of things, to say her piece, because we did not see that take place on the beach this week. So before we bring her on, we're going to get into the first question here, which is submitted by Jewel, who asked, someone said Joe and Kendall had been engaged at one point,

but were they? Now, this is something that Joe cleared up on last week's clickbait podcast. So if you haven't already tuned into that one, please go back and listen. But Joe and Kendall were not engaged. They obviously started their relationship on the last season of Paradise. They lived together for I would say a little over a year, close to two years and had a very, very serious relationship, but they were never engaged. No rings were given out. And yeah. So the next question. Let's see here. All right. This one has to actually deal with me and my one-on-one date with Thomas, because I obviously picked him, which I know watching it back seemed like it was. was very much out of the blue. So I want to clear the air here. Thomas and I actually,

we were at the VIP party the night before our actual date. And there was so much drama going on that night. And I'm just not a drama person that him and I just sat and talked for like 30 minutes in the corner. We drank champagne. We ate pizza. We formed some sort of connection conversation, whatever it might be that night. So it wasn't just out of the blue. I know that there's also speculation out there that I picked him simply because him and Aaron had some beef and that it would stir the pot. That was not the case. I will say Aaron and I did get into a little bit of an argument at that same party and I was just kind of over it. And so that's why I ended up picking topics for the date. Just, you know, if nothing else, I feel like it would have been a fun,

good lighthearted conversation yeah so you'll just have to see what takes place in the in the weeks to come people another question which I mean this the question of all questions obviously has to deal with the whole Piper

and Brandon and Natasha love triangle that we saw go down for two nights now I have to get into this because there are so many questions regarding logistics about Brendan and Piper regarding Natasha and if she was aware of what was going on prior to Paradise. She will, I know, speak very much into this, into the detail on her side of things on

clickbait this week. And for anyone listening who isn't aware, Natasha is my girl. She is one of my dear, dear friends. And she is just an incredible woman. So I have to first say, all of the love and support that we've seen flood for her is just incredible. I know that she's been struggling lately, just having to kind of relive this now wrecked relationship has been hard on her. And so keep supporting our girl. She is just, she's somebody who came onto the beach with such an open heart and really thinking she could find somebody, find a partner that would last. She was just so excited for it. And unfortunately, we saw that kind of ripped out from under her with all all of this Brennan and Piper drama.

Um, so again, she will get into this much more. And it's, it's her place to speak her piece and give her side of things. Uh, but one thing I need to get into because it really, really rubbed me the wrong way as a woman, as a friend was the way Brendan talked to and about Natasha in certain conversations. Um, the one that I want to touch on that I'm not okay with that never sat well with me after watching it was basically saying Natasha since day one didn't have any prospects on that beach which is not true Natasha like I said was so open to coming down onto that beach to meeting people to establishing a real connection that she could see last outside of paradise um she talked to many guys she was

attracted to a lot of the men out there and vice versa she's an incredible woman she's beautiful She's articulate. She's funny. She's charismatic. She's just like the whole package I would say. And I'm not just saying that because she's one of my best friends. But she really is incredible. And so for him to say she didn't have any other prospects and he was kind of the only one willing to give her a rose is complete bullshit. That's not the case. It's just it just so happened that they both formed a connection with one another, which he even said was stronger than a connection that he formed with Piper. If we all recall, he mentioned that several. times in conversations that he had. So let's not forget that. Another question that we got was just in terms of people think everything that went down that we saw between the conversations between Brennan and Piper were solely editing, which isn't the case. I mean, you see Brendan at one point playing with his microphone and trying to muffle up

certain conversations. I don't think they fully realized that there's can. cameras everywhere, whether one of the crewmen is holding a camera right in your face or we have Pelco cameras all throughout the beach. We're always miced up. And let's be honest, the technology for the show is impeccable. It's been a show for decades that has lasted for so long. You have to invest the best money in this technology. So everything that we as contestants say or do on that beach is us. Like, no one is forming our sentences for us. No one is there telling us what to say or what to do or when to do it or when to say it. Now, I understand to make a show you have to have

certain storylines, which I would assume Brendan and Piper aren't thrilled with their storyline at this point. But at the end of the day, they were the ones to have those conversations to say certain things to bring up, you know, news outlets from different articles and follower numbers and all of that, which, you know, people say there are people who come on the show for the wrong reasons. And I mean, not to call out the obvious, but Exhibit A is what we saw go down. One thing, too, when I have this in my notes, that was tough for me as not only a contestant who has done the show a number of times and has fallen in love and really invested my time in certain relationships. But I think something that was said from Piper really downplays the entire

experience for everyone who steps foot on the beach or on the bachelor or bachelorette. And basically it was something along the lines of playing a game. Like thank you for playing the game here, which I think for viewers might take it as, okay, this is this is only a competition. This is only a game. People only stick around to get more TV time, to get more followers, to be here for the club, whatever it might be. But for some people on this beach who are genuinely falling in love and really forming relationships here, like Riley and Marissa and Joe and Serena and Abigail and Noah, like, those are real feelings. Those are real relationships. People are like truly, truly falling in love. And it just is sad that,

that was even a sentiment said on the show and that it's sad that I think some viewers will take it and run with it and be like oh this is all scripted it's all fake it's not real um that was something just for me because I've done this several times and it's worked for me in the past and it can be a beautiful experience if you truly truly soak it in definitely rubbed me the wrong way um one other question and this is actually just something that gets brought up quite a big and that it's something that I've talked about with Tia, with Rachel when we used to do recaps. With any season, there's so much that goes down.

There's so much that is said, whether it's in other interviews or in conversations with other people, when you're living, you know, when you're filming, it's real life. You see what happens right in front of you. You don't always see what is being said behind the scenes with other people in interviews and ITMs. And so somebody asked, what is your thought on actually being on the beach, living on the beach, and then witnessing everything and now seeing different conversations? It's always interesting. That's one thing, whether you are a lead or just a contestant on the show that you will never get used to. There is so much that you think you know the full story to everything

when you're living in it and then you watch it back and you get a completely different idea or picture. And that, I think, is for all of us who are now watching all of the drama with Brendan and Piper and Natasha unfold. Again, I'm very close with Natasha. So I knew her side of things. I kind of knew the general picture of what was happening in that triangle on the beach. But now watching it back, I am seeing a much larger landscape that's being painted. and so again, I mean, my support for Natasha is tenfold after seeing some of the main things that were said about her to her. Don't sit well with me. It's tough at times to watch what other people say because I was friends with Brennan and Piper. I roomed with Piper on the

beach and she was so sweet. We really, I would say we formed a friendship. So it's interesting to see how conversations take place when you're not actually witnessing them or part of them. It's like I'm learning with all of the viewers and all of the listeners at this point. So it's very insightful. It's very eye-opening. It's not always easy. It's not always fun. It's really difficult at times, which I'm sure any contestant on the show has experienced.

So those are some of the main ones. And I could keep going because so many of you wrote in good questions, funny questions, random questions. So please keep writing in because hopefully one day, Tia and I can get to more of those. But in the meantime, we saw a lot of this woman go down.

She was part of a lot of the drama this week, but unfortunately, her side of the story wasn't fully able to be told. So we had to bring Alanna on to give her take on everything that happened between her and Chris, and maybe even part to the

arrival of her on to Paradise. So without further ado, Bachelor Happy Hour listeners, please welcome Alana to the podcast. Welcome to Bachelor Happy Hour, Elena. How are you doing? I'm doing fine. Thanks for having me. Of course. Well, this is the first time we've had you because on your past season, you know, you left a little bit early, I would say. So now is the time that we can get to know you and your story a little bit more, which is why we wanted to have you on, because as we saw this, week. There was so much drama happening with so many different people. You were obviously in the midst of some of that in your relationship with Chris and whatever was going on with him

and just Sennia. So this is why we wanted to have you on to say your side of things, to give your take on everything that went down. So, you know, I'm sure watching it back was a little bit triggering. It was probably crazy to see how everything is a little piece together in the storylines um before we get into all of that how are you doing in your personal life watching it all back are you good are you happy like overall are you glad that you ended up coming down to paradise um i actually haven't not been watching the season okay that's probably for the best yeah that probably kind of lets you know how i feel about paradise right now um i didn't have a very good experience there i have you know high hopes

I tried not to have crazy expectations, but clearly it didn't go at all how I could have imagined. Right. I personally, I'm doing fine. You know, it's been a while since then. I've kind of gotten over it. Having an airing right now is a bit triggering because it's bringing those emotions back that I was feeling a few months ago. But for the most part, I'm doing really well. Yeah.

Just trying to get through this right now. It'll go by quick. And what we always say in the world of bachelor nation is, you know, you might seem like you're in the thick of things and things are so difficult and everyone's, you know, throwing their comments and their reactions and their own feelings onto you or the situation. But somebody will always do something far more stupid or worse in a day and the pressure will be off of you. So you will get through this, I promise. One question that I wanted to ask you just fresh out the gate, because we saw you enter in. during the night of the party. You obviously came in with three other women. Um, and basically the way that it was introduced to all of us was that we'll be meeting four of you and two of you will stay.

So knowing that, were you aware of that coming in that only two of you would be coming down onto the beach the next day? Or did you think all four of you would be joining? Um, I was told that if I did not make a connection at the party, it would not be coming to the beach. so I was just under the impression you have to make a connection tonight or you're going home and this has all been for nothing. Yeah. Well, and I mean, not to mention, everyone has to be in quarantine obviously before you can come onto the beach. And so you had probably been in quarantine for quite some time, not exactly knowing. So I can only imagine that pressure and feeling like, oh shit, I have just a couple hours, you know, to meet somebody. Most of the people are already

coupled up and in some sort of relationship. Did you have a feeling Chris would already be there? Were you hoping to see him when you walked through those doors? I knew he would be there. I knew just any would be there. I mean, we'd all met before the show. I knew they'd probably be together because I knew that she was pretty sad on him going into paradise. But I was excited to see him still. I figured, you know, I was hoping to come in earlier, but we three is still not quite the end and relationships can still form at that point that can go somewhere. So I was still excited, but you know, my options were open. Chris wasn't the only guy on my list and I was just excited to see what would happen. Who else were you hoping to see there?

Well, a lot of guys from Katie season that ended up not coming at all. Okay. Because I just, you know, I was in quarantine like from the beginning. So I didn't really know who would show up. But I thought Thomas was super attractive. I was excited to see him. He's just really nice guy from a little bit that I talked to him. I thought Aaron was cute, but

he wasn't very talkative that night. Aaron was going through a lot that night. Yeah, he was going through a lot. I will say I maybe had something to do with that because him and I got into a little argument that evening. Who were you hoping? Was there anyone there

that you were like, oh, shit, I wish you wouldn't be here right now? Honestly, no. I mean, I tried to look at it from the perspective of like, I'm just going to go and, you know, roll with what happens and, you know, make it my experience. I thought Jesnia and I were on better terms coming in. So I was a bit taken back by how she greeted me. But I feel like she, you know, she knew I was coming in. So I can imagine that she was tense about that.

Can we get into that? Because so there was mentioned that you had all hung out in San Diego, obviously prior to everyone leaving to go on to Paradise. So I'm assuming you all at that point. Actually, let's back it up. Okay, so you all hung out in San Diego. What was that? Was it just a group of friends getting together?

Did you all know some of you would be going onto the beaches? How did, like, what did that look like? So Katie had just wrapped filming her season of Bachelorette and she just invited everyone that she was friends with to kind of hang out for a week in San Diego because she was planning on moving there and wanted to get us all together. I feel like a lot of us knew, you know, people talk,

like we kind of knew who to expect to be seeing on the beach shortly after that trip. But everything from the most part, from what I know, was kept strictly platonic between everyone. You know, I've heard some things from people since the show of stuff that happened in San Diego, but that's not my place to talk about. Like between Chris and Jesenia prior to that? Nothing having to do with me.

And I feel like, you know, I understand the nature of all of this and it's, you know, reality TV and we want to gossip about each other, but I'd rather. you know, let other people reveal their own business on their terms, then do that for them. Right. Okay. So we get to paradise. Obviously, we were friends or cordial or acquaintances before that. When you got there, obviously, we see you and Chris sit down.

You have a conversation. He mentions Gisania. Was he totally transparent about how into each other they were? or what their relationship was, because for me being there, you know, for already a few days and seeing them interact, like, they were one of the strongest couples on the beach. Like, I thought they were a done deal. I was like, it is Chris and Jacenia going all the way. It seemed like such a strong connection. Obviously, that got flipped upside down when you showed up. So was he totally transparent about how far along or serious they were? I feel like he told me, you know, I mean,

he obviously told me that they had been together since he got there um but he told me that you know me walking in was giving him second thoughts and you know he was i don't know he was having a hard time he didn't really describe to me the complete nature of their relationship though so we did see you at one point while christian just honey were having a conversation you go up and and pull him and chat with him did you at any point in the night um want to talk to just Senia or just see where she was at. Did you have any sort of conversation with her that evening? We did speak, but unfortunately didn't really go anywhere. Okay. And honestly, it's kind of up to Chris, because at that point, he was the one in the relationship with her. You weren't, which I understand.

So fast forward to the next day. Obviously, you walk in, you have a day card, you look fabulous. Titus Burgess greets you. And then you come into what I can only imagine, because we've all been there is one of the most intimidating moments when you walk up everyone is sitting there there's so many of us uh some people are excited to see new faces some people aren't it's a lot to take in but you walk in looking wonderful with the date card uh you pull chris for the date uh how did it feel first off walking in knowing that you have the power in your hands um and were you excited to go with chris or were you still maybe wanting to keep your options open and pull somebody else?

So thinking back to the party at a certain point, I mean, Chris had pulled me so often that it became a date for me. And I'm like, well, this is great because I'm making up for a lost time. And I figured my date card could just be a continuation of that the next day with Chris. I also thought it would be a bit disrespectful to take someone else and not focus on that, given how much stress it had caused the previous night. and you know people did come up to me and say hey if you're feeling this go for it so I did and I was excited to take him I was a little nervous about what his mood was going to be given everything that was going on but it was very intimidating walking in a little bit of a hostile crowd yeah I didn't really enjoy that very much yeah but no I was excited to take Chris I just you know know, I figured that that made the most sense. Right. At that point. I mean, you know, hindsight is

always 2020 now looking back, is there any part of you that wishes you would have maybe pulled somebody else in hopes that the entire paradise experience for you would have turned out a bit differently? Um, yes and no, because I, like I say, I don't want to have regrets. And I already said I regretted going on the show. But I feel like had I pulled someone else, people would have still been mad about what happened the night before. I feel like, you know, it was kind of at a point where the damage was done because no one really got to experience our date with us. So everything that was already going to lead to what happened later that night had happened already. Were you kind of shocked or blindsided, I guess, by how extreme everyone was already feeling

about you and Chris and just the way I think Chris was handling the entire situation between you and Jacenia? So, I mean, the way he handled it was never really, and I'm sure for people watching, it's like such an obvious thing. But for me in the moment, I had just come out of all this time in quarantine. And, you know, I was just ready and excited. and I really didn't notice much wrong with what was going on at the party, aside from, you know, a few things that I regretted doing there.

But I feel like it was, in my opinion, an overreaction on everyone's part. I am not a very confrontational person. And if I'm in a position where I need someone to explain themselves, I will offer them the floor and allow them to do so. And no one kind of gave me any grace. I was just flumped in with, you know, what had been being talked about all day, which honestly just strikes me more as a retaliation based off of being disappointed versus being based off of fact.

We'll get into that. We'll get into the evening after your date with Chris. But I want to first get to the date part because we see you and him go off. you go ziplining through the jungle. You obviously then have time to sit down, have a conversation. I think the funniest part for me watching you and Chris in that interaction was the kissing because at one point you were kind of like teaching him how to kiss and how to, you know, like place his body and how to sit and what to do with his hands, which I was dying because it was,

he looked so awkward like this was his first kiss um what like yeah what i was going to say it it just looked awkward so like once you got into it was their passion like did you feel like oh i could see myself dating this guy or were you just like we're already here we've already gone through some drama i asked him on the date obviously there's tension back at the resort with him like what was going through your mind in that moment? I was just trying to make the most of it. I think that, you know, we had some awkward positioning problems sitting there. Kidding sitting next to each other on a couch was not easy for us.

But no, it was good. It was just awkward positioning and neck angles. I don't know. No, at one point, too, I think like he kind of then sat up and pushed you back, push your head off the couch. And you were like, Chris, no, you have to keep my head up. And I was just like, oh, Lord, somebody needs to teach this man how to use his body with the woman that he's into. Yeah. I think he was having a bad day. Yeah. He was having a rough go. Yeah. But he, okay, at the end of the day, even if you have a rough go, if you're still into somebody

and, you know, trying to make out with somebody that you want to date and be with, like, put that aside um did you feel then leaving that date and walking back you know down the steps entering back onto the beach with everyone down there did you feel confident in what you and him had established um i mean aside from the awkward part we did have good kissing standing up so good just for the record the kissing standing was great it was just the sitting Sitting would work. But I think that, you know, I was interested in him before Paradise because he was just always so kind to me and like very respectful. And that's the kind of person that I could see myself with because I've been with a lot of guys who are the exact opposite of that. And so I was looking forward to seeing where it could go at that point. You know, I wasn't 100% set on him. You know, I'd still wanted to possibly explore things with other guys at the beach. There were guys that hadn't shown up yet that I was maybe looking forward to seeing.

And so I feel like I was excited, but I wasn't like set completely. Like all in. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. I mean, it's one date, so it's kind of hard to be. Well, and that's what Paradise is all about is dating and getting to know multiple people to see who you have the best connection.

with so i mean yeah we've seen it with multiple couples already where they go off on other dates just to explore what's out there um so i don't think you know anyone would fault you for that by any means when you got back to the beach were you at all caught off guard when joe pulled chris to talk to him i was a bit oblivious at that point um i didn't know that that had been being talked about while we were gone. I thought people were just upset because of the night before. I didn't realize that the narrative had been created that we had already been a couple outside of the show. So that was shocking to me to find out to turn around and just see kind of Chris just getting ripped apart. I mean, I don't know how else to describe it. It wasn't fun for me. I just had a

really good day with him for the most part aside from the couch kissing but uh yeah it was hard it was emotional you know i hadn't slept and mm-hmm oh i know yeah it's a lot it's a lot to take in especially in those circumstances i mean well like when everyone kind of started going at chris and the argument started getting pretty heated i would say what was going through your mind at that point. I just heard so many things that weren't true being said. And all I could think was, I need to say something. I need should say something, but I'm not confrontational at all. And it just seemed like such intense energy happening over there that I don't know. I feel like I waited for a minute. And then I just asked, like, does anyone want to hear what I have to say? And no one did.

which I will say so I wasn't there that night I actually left for a date so I was gone the entire evening when you and Chris came back and so I was getting filled in the next day about what we missed what went down on the beach and they everyone had mentioned at one point you know you guys came back it got superheated everyone kind of started to call out Chris for his behavior and you know what they thought he had planned, I guess, during his time on Paradise. But when I, I will say this, when I heard that you had jumped in and been like, hey, does anyone want to hear what I have to say? And everyone was like, no. I was like, let the girl speak. Like, to me, that seemed like bullshit if you wanted to get like the full story. Like, regardless of if they liked Chris or if

they believed Chris or not, you still had, I would say, an opportunity to give your side of things and to shut rumors down to be like, we weren't in a relationship. Sure, we were friends, we were acquaintances, whatever it was. But I think it's terrible when people just totally shut someone down and don't even hear their side of things. Like, I don't think that was fair. And I think it maybe would have allowed for you potentially to have stuck around a little bit longer. You know, whether Chris wanted to stay or not, I think it would have allowed you, your voice to be heard to put the rumors to bed. So say, you were allowed to have the floor and they let you speak what would you have said in that moment

do you think i probably would have just that none of what you're saying is true and just said everything i've said to you here today you know chris and i were friends as far as i'm concerned there was no plan here um you know i i don't know i just would have asked everyone if they could relax a little it just it seemed so intense and so aggressive and angry and that's not how I handled myself at all. I really just wanted the opportunity to say this was not planned. I'm sorry that you guys don't like the way that it's being handled. I empathize with that. If the roles were reversed, I would feel the same way. You know, it's not, I don't think that he made all the right decisions. I'm not going to say that he did. But it would have been nice to

just say, look, I didn't plan to come here and have a relationship with Chris and the fact that you don't even care to acknowledge that. You know, we don't always have to believe people when they tell us something, but you kind of just have to hear them out and then be okay with it. Do you think had you had that moment to say your piece and to say, you know, we didn't have anything planned, we weren't dating prior to this? Had you had that moment, had Chris still decided to leave, do you think you would have stuck around? Would you have wanted to stay, knowing that, you know, you said your side of things. Chris is a grown man. He can make his own decisions. He made his bed now. He has to lie in it. Would you have wanted to stay longer?

I think it would have depended on the reception from what I said, because at that point, it felt just really toxic and uncomfortable. And I felt like everyone hated me, to be honest. So, you know, if they had been nice and warm, possibly. But I just, at that point, if things had continued to stay the way they were, and I felt so much hostility from other people, I probably would have left. Mm-hmm. Okay. So fast forward then to, we see you and Chris having a conversation on one of the couches

after all of the drama with him went down. And he explains that he wants to. leave. He doesn't think this is the place for him anymore. What was going through your mind? Because this was the interesting part. Before you stepped down onto the beach before everyone went after him, you guys, it seemed like you both felt confident. And again, I know you're saying you maybe wanted to stay to explore anything else, but I think he, on his end, still felt like I have this connection with you. He wants to stay and explore that. And regardless of if he stayed or not, like it seemed interesting that even though yes there was so much combative energy coming at him

like if he's truly feeling what he's saying to you i thought he would have still wanted to give that a go and see where it could go like if he really wanted to pursue a relationship and be with you he would have so when i saw him just get up and walk away i was like what the hell are you doing man it didn't it something wasn't lining up um and that's where it goes back to you know things weren't going his way maybe he wasn't going to be portrayed all that well and that's when he kind of had this like fight or flight response to just leave um so were you confused by that by what he was just telling you about 10 minutes ago versus when he's like I'm done I'm out by and just walks away from you it was definitely confusing all around I mean I expected to walk down

from the date and, you know, maybe not everyone was happy to see us, but I didn't expect that. So I felt super overwhelmed in that moment and nothing really made sense. So it was just like one more thing, add it to the list of everything that's going wrong today. Now you're leaving. When he asked me to leave with him, do you want to talk about that? Yeah. Oh, of course. Yes, please do. I mean, I did feel confident in Chris. you know, at that point, but the whole point of paradise, which I felt like was missed entirely, you know, for my brief time on this show, was that the point is to date other people, you know, you come into this environment and you, you want to end up with someone

that you truly want to be with and you have to explore different things during that process. And so I did want to have a chance to continue to do that. I mean, it doesn't mean that I wasn't happy with how our date went, but it would have been nice if all of that angst hadn't come along with it so that I could have had that opportunity. Where do you stand now? Because we saw, this was another part that got me, because we saw you both leave.

You got into your van ready to pull out. and Chris tries to hop into your van with his backpack and luggage and you're like, Chris, this is mine. So we see him then move into his own van and you guys pull away. Where did you leave it?

Have you talked since then? Are you in a relationship with him now? Where do you both stand? I mean, I in that moment was so mad at him because I was just like, how could you have done this to me? And I was kind of blaming him for you know everything that was happening i feel like he was just really in over his head and he

you know i have like i hate to say this i'm sorry men are really stupid sometimes and like they don't handle things well all the time they really and they don't you know they don't think things through they don't think logically they just kind of do whatever they want when they want without thinking about it. And I feel like he was so overwhelmed that night that he wasn't making any good decisions. And my reaction to him reflected that. I mean, I didn't want to go anywhere with him in that moment.

I didn't want to talk to him, nothing. After the show, you know, he was super apologetic. He felt terrible. And it took me like a while to reciprocate reaching out to him because I was just so disappointed. you know I'd you prepare a lot to go to paradise you know you you go through a lot and I was freaking worked out nonstop and then I didn't even wear a swimsuit and I know that that's like the point is to find love but it's also like you know you want to enjoy the full experience you

want to hang out with people and make new friends and you know really have that experience and so I was just angry with him for taking it away from me and I feel like I got to a point after the show where I remembered the Chris that I was friends with before and I'm like, this is a nice person. You know, I don't think that he's a bad guy. I feel like he, again, handled himself incredibly poorly.

So, you know, he is in my life and I've forgiven him. Like, we're okay with each other. You know, I've seen him a few times. I don't have any... problem with him now because of the show you know i've let a lot of that go um i like to let things go it's kind of hard to see people talking about me now and saying things that are upsetting and having not had them apologize for them that's hard for me to let go but he was so apologetic and just you know

he's been a really big support system for me because not a lot of the people from the show have been so you say you've talked and he's still in your life is that strictly platonic, like no relationship after that other than just a friendship? Um, no. I mean, it, it's, we've, he's taking me on a bunch of day. It's like, oh, so we're dating, huh?

Uh, I'm so, I'm, I'm, I have to be honest, like I'm very scared to talk about it because I feel like it'll, it'll look a certain way and, you know, but the, the fact is that we weren't dating before and that's, that's really like the truth that I have to share yeah and I don't think it would look a certain way I mean like look at the end of the day people and viewers are going to take them a run with whatever they decide to right like if you guys you know weren't in a relationship before paradise you know really had your first proper date I would say on the show and obviously

you left apart but you still can now explore a relationship Like the show bonds people in such a weird way that I don't think anyone who doesn't go through it will understand. And if he was there for you after it and all of this craziness and when things are really heightened right now, I don't think that's a bad thing. I actually think like I commend you for, you know, accepting the apology and moving forward from that because it can really like make or break people. It can make or break friendships, relationships. Like it's a it's a hard thing to deal with that no one, viewers won't understand and that's okay. And I think it's, it's okay to own the truth and say that. And if you don't feel comfortable sharing details of whatever you are right now, I'm not going to pry. I won't pry too much. So if I ever make you uncomfortable, just tell me to shut the F up. But yeah, I mean, look, if you guys are happy and exploring whatever this could be,

I say go for it at the end of the day. Love is love is love and you can't help who you fall for. So not to say that you're in love or anything. as you were speaking earlier though about you know how when when you left you were just so disappointed and how he reacted to the criticism on the beach and how he just kind of you know brushed his hands and walked away had he gone through all of that and still said like yeah that sucks and I hate being attacked like that but I have your back and I want to pursue this if he would have just stood up a little bit more and recognized maybe you

or position to and just been like fuck everyone else let's just do this and see where this could go would you have like how would you have i think um process all that would you have been attracted to that and be like okay you know like it's going to be tougher a little bit but let's see this through and that's hot that you're standing up for me and that you have my back yeah no it definitely would have been nice to have it go down that way um you know and i think that had that happened and i had been able to stay, he had stayed, I think people would have realized they were maybe kind of projecting from other things going on at the beach onto us, you know, and everything going on with Brendan and Piper had just been so fresh that I feel like that was already in people's minds and maybe

they would have realized, you know, a few days later that, okay, we can't lump these two in with that because it is a different situation. Yeah. And I think, too, there was just so much happening on that beach. I think tensions were already so high with people assuming you and Chris, maybe were in a relationship or had some sort of packed before paradise. The same with Brendan and Piper. Like there was just a lot of this narrative of people already being in some sort of established relationship that I think, I mean, those couple of days, I will say, like the night of that party and the next couple days after that, things were so heightened. And that was like all, not all, but a huge majority of the conversation

was around that of people, you know, like, don't come to paradise if you're already talking to someone or already in a relationship. There was just so much talk about having conversations or being in some sort of relationship prior to paradise. And I will say, I think it was easy for people on the beach to kind of lump you and Chris in that situation into the same category as like the Piper and Brendan situation, which to me and from living on the beach, everyone was to completely different things. Like, yeah, you and Chris had hung out in a group setting were friends. You didn't have a plan or you weren't already dating. You did not already have an established relationship versus the Brennan and Piper where they were basically

in a relationship. They were already established. They did kind of have some sort of plan coming in where whoever gets their first will stick around until the other one comes and do what they have to do to play the game, as they've said. And so I don't want people to see your situation with Chris and see theirs and be like, oh, it's the same thing. Because it's not. It's vastly different. No, it's not. I mean, you know, like I said before, Chris and I had never been on a date before the show. We never hooked up. Nothing like that. You know, it was strictly a friendship, group settings. It's different. And I think the main thing that shows the difference is, that I came into it, excited to see Chris, but still wanting to explore things with other people.

And that was not how Brendan and Piper were going to carry through with the rest of their experience. I think that's what it comes down to is, like, people thought you and Chris had some sort of plan coming into Paradise. And talking to you, that was not the case. And I think with Brennan and Piper, the plan was very, very transparent, you know, certain things in the way that they were talked about, the way that their interactions were prior to Paradise, it was very apparent. You guys had no intention of coming down and being like, okay, you know, this week, this is what you have to do to solidify your spot here. And then once you're here, we're going to be all in. Like, there was none of that. And that's why, that's actually why I want to have you here is to say

your side of things to give your peace and to shut those rumors down because I know how that, and that's important. And if I was in your position, I wouldn't want people lumping me into the same category as Brennan and Piper and what they were doing because that's, that hurt people. Like, yes, I know I understand Gessania was hurt in this and I don't want to downplay that. But the way Brendan and Piper executed this plan that they had is vastly different from what happened with you and Chris. And so that's why I want you to clear the air and say your side here because now's the opportunity because you weren't allowed to on that beach. Yeah, no, I definitely wasn't allowed to say anything. Everyone made sure of that, but I had no plan with Chris. You know, we were friends.

That was it. There's a huge difference between Chris and I knowing each other already and Brendan Piper who were already dating. Yeah. Well, and yeah, you had said, you guys hung out twice in group settings. It wasn't, I'm assuming, romantic. it wasn't like you were going on dates you didn't see chris off right before he left for paradise there was none of that prior to it like we flirted we were attracted to each other but we nothing like that like a line was never crossed look nothing's wrong with a little healthy flirting we've all done that it's it's the you know hey what are we we like each other once we're both on the beach together we're all in we're going to like do what we have to do to get a rose each week to

to stick around, waiting for the next person to come. And yeah, exactly. That's not the point. And for you to still be open to seeing what the beach had to potentially offer if it didn't work out with Chris. And even the fact now that Chris has helped you through a really difficult time and you had to kind of reform this friendship and let it grow into something potentially stronger, I don't think you should feel ashamed of that. I don't think you should be worried about that. I mean, I get like wanting to keep your relationship close to you and private. I understand that part. But I don't think you should be ashamed of where you and him are at

at this point. Yeah. I think I've just learned personally that for me, you know, for other people, clearly it works. But for me, relationships and friendships are best formed off screen. Mm-hmm. You know, like not on camera, not in a controlled setting. And so I have kind of taken like a lot of time to think about this and I just know that for me like the ability to have privacy on certain things is important for me now because I did not stay on the show so I don't really owe that all that information to the public know what I mean like it's it's mine and I can share it when I want or I don't have to and I like that about this the fact that I have the ability to have privacy, whereas a lot of these people don't at this point.

Oh, I love that you just said that. Seriously, everyone needs to rewind for the past 40 seconds and listen to what Atlanta had to just say because I think it's so easy for viewers and listeners to think, oh, because you signed up for a show one time, everything in your world is open at any given time, and that's not the case. So I'm so happy that you just said that because that's true.

You know, you can choose to go on a TV show for one season and then choose to still keep your relationship private or keep any part of your life private. And that's okay. And that's what people listening need to remember. And it's just important to, you know, also realize that so many people met before Paradise that were there this season. You know, not I didn't just meet Chris. Hyper didn't just meet Brendan, but, you know, Justenia and Chris.

hung out before paradise. Mm-hmm. And it was no different than him and I hanging out before paradise. Right. People just want to fix it on the little details of, you know, what will cause some ruffles. And look like, I mean, I went on to the beach knowing probably three-fourths of the people because I've talked to them. I've had them on the podcast.

I've either met them at, you know, it's just, yeah, it's such a small world, this bachelor nation world full of contestants. And again, it bonds people in such a weird way that, of course, like, everyone's kind of talking. And what I think people need to realize, too, is like, everyone's talking, but it's not always romantic. It's not always to see what kind of relationship could be. It's friendships. It's leaning on one another. It's supporting each other.

And so, and that's an okay thing. I think there's such a taboo of like, oh, my God, you cannot talk to anybody before you step foot on the beach, which isn't a case. You just, again, going back to a plan or, you know, having some sort of like, manipulative like scheme going into it that's where it's not okay that's not what paradise is about but exactly and i know that like i um i just ania at one point calls me out for you know being there for the wrong reasons not just having a plan but for like you know being like getting the fame out of it and you know that just was so funny to me to hear because it's like i sorry chris but like Like, if I was in it for that, why would I go for Chrissy, who the Pigeons?

In home, yeah, yeah. No, I mean, that's a good point. But I don't know. I just, I feel like, you know, and I feel like this is important to say because a lot of people talk about this. But, you know, obviously the first, like the main intention of going on one of these shows should be to find love. You know, it's, that's something we all want. We're all single people that are looking for our person. But it's kind of ridiculous to call people out for something that people themselves get benefits of.

You know, like the exposure that say Joe and Riley and Jocenia get, you know, they take, I don't know how to say this properly, but they get advantages from that. so then to come and say that two people who have never posted ads and aren't very active on social media are there for that reason and use that as a negative thing to say when they themselves do that. I just, I don't understand why that's a reason to talk poorly about people when they do it themselves. Listen, everyone who will be seen on the show at some point, it's going to have some sort of you know it's going to boost you in some way shape or form it's just the exposure the awareness of you so it's like it's impossible for anybody who steps foot on the

beach to not get a bump in Instagram followers or brands rich you know or whatever it might be like that's just the nature of the beast given our world and our social climate like that's just it is what it is um but yeah It's unfortunate to hear people like try and use that as a way to cut others down that are on the show when they take advantage of that I guess is what I'm trying to say.

One thing I want to ask you now though is because obviously as you mentioned going into Paradise you had all hung out in a group setting as friends. Where do you stand with Jessenia? Have you been able to have any sort of dialogue with her post filming Paradise

to kind of hash anything out or to explain anything or have you, you know, have you not connected with her whatsoever? I reached out to Justenia after the show. And, you know, I didn't really feel like I did anything wrong aside from being a section of it with Chris in front of her. That was my one regret of being on the show. I felt like that was wrong. I remember watching that happen with Blake and Dylan and Hannah and being like, oh my God, poor Dylan.

And like, I just felt so bad. So I realized how. wrong that was. And in that moment, I was, you know, just caught up in the moment and things happen. I apologize to her for that. And, you know, I just said it was sad that this narrative was created about Chris and I. And she didn't receive my apology very well and just kind of said that, you know, I got what I asked for, basically. So we haven't spoken since then. Okay. Well, Alana, it was so great to have you on before you hop off is there anything else that you want to share with any and all of our listeners i was going to say anyone all of our listeners um or any more

of your side of things that you want to make sure is out there for everyone to know from you um well thank you for having me i really appreciate you giving me the space to finally talk um and i just you know, just that, you know, I did not have a plan with Chris. I was excited to see him and that's really the extent of it. And I hope that people can see that and, you know, think for themselves amongst all the voices. And, you know, I really just like don't want any hard feelings between myself and anyone that's on the show. But like you said, you can't please everyone. So yeah, I just I'm happy that I got to share the truth. Yes, your side of things, which I think is important because, again, it should have been

allowed on that beach. It unfortunately wasn't, but that is why we had you here today. So what is next for you? Next for me. I don't know. I moved back to the States from Canada in January, and I'm just trying to figure out where I'm going to settle down and I'm starting a business. So I'm focusing on myself, right?

now. Good. I love to hear that. What business is it? It's a conscious clothing line. So it's just basic pieces that are multifunctional. So you can wear them, you know, to go out or to sleep in, basically. Oh my gosh, my type of clothing. I love this. That's so exciting. We'll stay in touch. We would love to follow along and see all of the incredible things to come. And who knows, maybe a skewed a paradise relationship came from all of the craziness that we saw from this past week. So thank you so much for joining. Take care. And stay in touch. Thank you. Bye, Becca. My boyfriend's professor is way too friendly. And now I'm seriously suspicious. Wait a minute, Sam. Maybe her boyfriend's just looking for extra credit. Well, Dakota, luckily,

it's back to school week on the OK Storytime podcast. So we'll find out soon. This person writes, my boyfriend's been hanging out with his young professor a lot. He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone. Hold up. Isn't that against school policy? That seems inappropriate. Maybe find out how it ends by listening to the OK Storytime podcast and the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you.

When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials easier. Complex problem solving takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, my name is Enya Humanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect.

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