Bachelor Happy Hour - Becca & Thomas Return to ‘Paradise’

Episode Date: November 16, 2022

This week on “Bachelor Happy Hour,” Becca is joined by her fiancé Thomas to recap this week’s episodes of “Paradise” and to share some fun stories from their appearance on the beach! Plus, they chat about their recent life changes, including their home renovation, and, of course, Thomas’ adorable proposal to Becca. Don’t forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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What's up, Happy Hour listeners? I'm your host, Becca Kufrin. And this week is looking a little different because Michelle, unfortunately, cannot be here. So I brought in the one and only reinforcer himself. We got Thomas here. Welcome back to Happy Hour, hon. I thought I was going to impersonate Michelle and try to, like, skate. that one by everyone. Do you want to pretend to be? Hey, everyone. It's Michelle Young here. Welcome to another

week of Bachelor Happy Hour. You know, I feel like you, it's not going to work. You couldn't fool anyone with this mustache that you have going on. Yeah, you're right. That was first and foremost, I apologize for the disrespect to that one, Michelle. That one's not going to buy anybody. But yeah, I'm glad to be back. This is going to be fun. Yeah. So for those of you who may or may not remember, The last time Thomas was on Happy Hour, well, it was months ago now, but at that point, he also had a mustache. He once again brought the mustache back, not just for Happy Hour, but for Movember. We've gotten a lot of people DMing us and commenting on our photos on social about why he has the mustache. So that is the reason why.

And for those who weren't familiar with Movember, it's Men's Prostate Cancer Awareness Month. men's prostate cancer is one of the leading causes and then one of the leading actual forms of cancer that men have. So it's just for awareness, men. Got to support. If I could grow a mustache, I would in November. But we're not here to talk about facial hair as exciting as it is. We obviously have to get into everything that happened in Paradise this week because we, of course, were there. We made a very quick appearance down there to kick off the Sadie Hawkins' 90s-themed.

dance, which we'll get into because that was so much fun. But Tommy, before that, let's just chat with people. A lot of you wrote in some different questions that we'll get around to answering later, but we've had some big life changes since the last time you were on. Obviously, we were in the house and it is complete demolition in there. Still going through this renovation, but if anyone missed it, Thomas recently proposed to me, even though we were already engaged, he popped the question. Real first full circle moment there. Yeah. So now, oh my God, this is so funny and think about it. So now I've been engaged. Does it count as four times now since I proposed to you? All I know is I made a joke to Becca the other day that she's one ring away from

becoming Thanos. And she still doesn't understand the reference. I've never seen Marvel, so I don't get it. I thought it was like the Elizabeth Holmes blood company or whatever. But whatever it is, all I know is it feels good. And I'm glad we got to celebrate that and I'm glad I was able to put a ring on it yes exactly is how you're going to say I put a ring on it I put a ring on it he did yes so obviously on the show you saw us explained to my proposal to Thomas but he did something really really wonderful to when he proposed to me it was so cute I kind of saw it coming I'm not going to lie I wasn't a hundred percent surprised, but what really got me, what was super special this time around, is he actually

had the ring for a while. I don't even know how long you can tell everyone for how long you had it. I had the ring for about three months before I did it. And it's one of those things that would have done it a lot sooner if you didn't want it so bad. Oh, shut up. You made, you put that in your mind that I wanted the ring so bad. But it was actually really cute because he took a ton of photos behind the scenes behind my, literally behind my back when I was taking naps or cooking or just preoccupied and put this whole photo compilation together of this ring. It's been everywhere. He took it to Minnesota. It's been to different towns. When she says preoccupied, that might be a little bit of a generous statement. It's more so when she

just had no idea that I possibly would have a ring on me. I mean, we were in very public situations like standing on baseball fields and at restaurants. He just had no idea. And it was it was a game to me. almost at the end and it was that's probably why you wanted to keep it and not put it on the finger for so long is this little challenge to yourself there was one point where I kept trying to see how far I could push that envelope and I was convinced I was an end of proposing just on that one instance you turn around and you catch me trying to take a funny picture well I did almost see it once there was one time where I was picking up the dog poop at a park and Thomas Thomas was holding a cup of coffee and it was behind the cup of coffee on his thumb and I thought I saw something sparkly

and I was like what is that but it was like seven in the morning again I was picking up dog poop I was like he's not going to pair pose over dog poop actually you probably would I wouldn't be surprised but that was the only time I mean I did see it not knowing what it was it was a funny picture yeah I had to go for it really added to that compilation yeah it was great I think it carried its weight yeah so we like like you just said we've come full circle so it's been really special Fun to finally share it with the world and be able to wear this baby on my finger. It was getting a little lonely. So that's our life right now.

Things are good. And excitingly, she hasn't hit me with that ring yet, seeing that the house isn't done yet. Well, I did actually punch you in the face when we were sleeping. You said that was an accident. It was. Wink, wink, no, it was. But this is a great time. I think let's just get into paradise.

because that's where we met. That's where we fell in love. We wouldn't be engaged today without those beaches of paradise. So a lot went down and we saw the aftermath of Rodney leaving. Let's let me just ask you this. What were like some top moments that stuck out to you besides our moments like when we were down there of this week? I would say my biggest takeaway immediately. was the strength of Brandon's words of affirmation towards Serene.

He has an ability to turn any scenario into a way to just profess his love to her. And it's beautiful. Like it's to the point when everyone's beaten up, Rodney's gone, everyone's just hurting. He just looks her in the face. He's just like, this is why I'm so blessed to have you. This is why I love you so much. This is why it's so special. To me, I'm picturing they're sitting there having breakfast and he gets an omelet or something.

and it's like these ingredients in here they just mix together perfectly this is amazing it reminds me of us i'm so lucky to have you you know who you know who brandy rants me of who you i'll take that man is ready to get engaged that man is ready to find love to live love and he deserves it oh yeah i'll take that as a compliment no but he really truly like ever since seen him not even on michel's season but seen him at the beginning of paradise he actually did remind me of you and i agree i think that they obviously they're the strongest couple on that beach right now I mean we sat firsthand but I think that in that moment that was like the first time we saw brand didn't really break down obviously he was in tears for Rodney leaving but the fact that serene was there to comfort him and they just like

had this moment where they were like I don't want to be with everyone else who want to be away and just like lean on each other I think that helped their relationship because they haven't really I mean they haven't themselves really been tested but I think it was a good strengthening moment for them. Let me ask you a question on that. You said they haven't been tested yet, but to me it's almost like they haven't even had a reason to be tested yet because they're just so set forth on loving each other. Would you say that's almost a test in itself, that nothing coming to that beach can deter them? Well, I think, I mean, when you're living on that beach there's not really tests unless they're like dramatic show planted tests right like they'll

be tested in the real world i'm sure if they're sold together in this moment in time like they're probably being tested outside of the show but they have i mean they they it's not like they've had to go through seeing each other go on dates with other people like since day one since like our one they were so into each other and like adamant for one another that they haven't like had to haven't had other forces come in to test them. Does that make sense? And that's why like Rodney leaving it wasn't even drama for them and their relationship, but it was just a hard moment that Brandon had to get through that Serene was there for. Does that make sense? That makes complete sense. Okay. She has his back. Maybe we're not making any sense and our listeners are

going to hear us be like, what the hell are they talking about? But yeah, that was a cute moment. And I want to get into Logan and Kate's relationship because I know you have your thoughts on it and your opinions watching it. I heard the comments. We have talked at length about their relationship on this podcast a few times. And I feel like each week it just keeps kind of, what's the word, like snowballing in a bad way? they just, I don't think, are ever going to be on the same page. There's a couple things going on.

Their love languages are completely different. One of them is that Kate's love language is she wants Logan to get a laptop, log into Indeed.com and start applying for better jobs immediately. And two, it's just, they don't see eye to eye. No, I think they're just, I think they just want different things in life. They're at different places. But I don't think the way that they communicate about. about those things is ever it never makes sense they're never on the same page then and

i i quite honestly feel like logan is getting the short end of the stick on paradise i felt so bad for logan in these two episodes on multiple fronts yeah one the conversations he has on with kate it just sort of pin him against the wall with nothing to do and then two when gabby and rachel came down i come from almost a biased perspective on this because i know if we were in a situation on that beach and the lead from my season came down, that would not be anywhere close to an accurate representation of who I am. Right. And that Logan was in that exact scenario.

And although history sort of repeated himself from his season with Gabby and Rachel to his time switching between partners in Paradise. But he wasn't really like, would you say he was switching between partners? because he never really established anything substantial, besides maybe with Cheney, but Cheney was also going on other dates with people. That's exactly my point, because although it's not that substantial in paradise, in that scenario with Kate and she's hearing those things from Gabby and Rachel, that almost has Kate even go further out against Logan.

Yeah. Yeah, I definitely felt bad for Logan in that moment, especially when Rachel was talking about him, because Rachel has one experience with him. and that she can have her own takeaways from her season and what he did and that's fine but ultimately i feel like it was getting close to like really bashing logan for something that didn't need to be that extreme like it made i think if i was kate i would have been like oh my gosh like logan now seems like this terrible guy i don't know what who to believe or what to think which in reality like wasn't even that big of a deal i don't think so i just felt yeah and then

we saw like this small glimmer of hope for him when Lindsay came down and I thought he was going to say yes to going on that date with her and part of me was like do it bro just go on that day just like see because you could tell that they were both intrigued and interested but I think only out of respect for Kate and not having not wanting to potentially deal with the wrath of Kate exactly yes your words but I think that's that's the reason why he said no to Lindsay I think had Kate, had he not had a conversation with Cater, had she not just been like, no, don't do this, I think he would have explored it. Absolutely. Because when Mara came in and she asked him directly about that, he said, no, well, I think it's too late in the game to consider these dates. Yeah. All of a sudden, Lindsay goes, oh, what's up? Yeah. Yeah. I think they were both interested. I, you know, at this point in time, I don't know what happens to Logan and Kate after this. Like, we'll find it at the reunion. But. I wonder if now, if there's a world where Lindsay and Logan could work out. Potentially. If that hasn't happened yet, you know, maybe you guys need to slip into each other's DMs. We'll see what, keep us posted because I would be interested in this.

I would like to see where that could maybe go. Absolutely. What else stood out to you this episode? It's going down there, obviously. Which actually is a good segue to get into Giacenia. and and Andrew and N.C. But there was one thing I wanted to say overall before we get into that. And our time down there is this show, and maybe it's just been more apparent in these.

Maybe it's been more apparent in this season because I feel like there's several toxic relationships. But I feel like. Like what? Who's displaying any sort of toxic relationship? Okay. obviously elephant in the room Genevieve and Aaron

also Kate and Logan I feel like every time we see Aaron and Jen have a conversation and it doesn't go as planned and it turns into a fight and she packs her bags and she leaves and she's ready to get in the car

down the jungle like they have this moment where like he seeks her out they talk about it which they really they never really get anywhere they like put a bandit on it for five minutes make out

Yeah, I agree that we both can agree, watching their relationship unfold is both itchy and painful. It's painfully itchy. Painfully itchy. God. So let's jump back and sort of look at what's going on with another couple, like you were saying, Jusenia, Andrew, NC. What's going on there? Well, I thought after just sending and Andrews conversation at the end of episode one, after he went on the date with NC, I thought that was like I thought the book was closed the chapter was over it seemed to me

that Jesenia understood now you know Andrew might not be into her he's seeking someone else like okay we have the closure we need that's why then the next episode especially like when we were down there I was surprised that it was still an ongoing issue between them I was shocked because when we got down there I didn't even know Andrew had any sort of history which you said yeah it seemed like he was with nc and that was going on when we initially walked down yeah yes yeah and let's get into that too okay so when thomas and i were first asked to go down to paradise honestly we had no idea what we were going to do until we were in mexico um we were just like hell yeah get us back down on that beach we want to like make new good memories there where

we you know we met there but we didn't leave there together last year so so we were at all for we were so excited just to get back to the place where we met and equally as sweaty as we were the first time of the round so sweaty but it was so fun we had a blast it was really cute to see thomas to like take everything in now like from this point of view where it was it was so much more relaxing we we knew like once we got there that we're going to be kicking off a date but we were like we don't have to be part of the drama we don't have you know we don't have to like figure out our relationship we know where we are it was just way more relaxing we're like we're not part of these stories like we can just kind of have fun and give advice and

mess around get the tea whatever but um it was so special to be back we definitely had some highlights we ate way too many chicken nuggets and french fries i'm still working those off that is that was the one thing we're like if we're coming to mexico can we please have the resort make us chicken nuggets because that is what everyone used to eat every night before roast ceremonies, well, actually every day. And so, yeah. Everyone wants to know what, like, the paradise diet is. What do you do for a paradise bod?

Nuggets. Nuggets, French fries, and a hot take, you ask for a side of honey and you dip those in them. Yeah, that was a you. That was not a me thing. It's amazing. Yeah. So we get there and we were kind of, I would say, not heaven. hesitant but like a little nervous walking in because we didn't know what we were walking into

first of all and we didn't know who was still going to be there we didn't really know who would be dating who and um we walk in and of course everyone's like always on guard i feel like when new people walk in they're like what girls or guys are coming in to like steal our people and so i think once they saw us they're like oh we're good we're safe like these people are already basically married and like to go to bed at 8 p.m so we're set um but who was most who were you who were you who most excited to see. Well, walking down those steps, I was hoping to see Rodney. So that one really hurt.

Yeah. Shameless plug, Rodney for Bachelor. Yeah. He's been wanting to say that for a while. So say it one more time louder into the mic. Rodney for freaking Bachelor. That man deserves the world. He does.

He really does. Yeah, we were bummed. He wasn't there. And then secondly, I was looking forward to see, see all my guys. I mean, Andrew, he's always delight to see. Michael. You were excited to see Michael. Michael literally jumped in my arms and he baby co-walled me and it just felt right.

I was excited to see Aaron. I know. Were you? Aaron to me is one of the funniest people who I've been around on the show or just in life general. He's hysterical. I'm going to go ahead and say it. Aaron is nectar personality-wise. Would I want my daughter to date Aaron?

Absolutely not. Oh, I would put a chastity belt on him. Yeah. Would I get beers from? Absolutely. No. I'm not going to put a chassis belt on it. But I was excited to see everybody. It was a little disappointing to see a lot of the people I cared about in some pretty tough situations. Yeah. Yeah. We, I mean, I was hoping to see Rodney. I still wanted to see Justin too. Those were some guys on tour with me that I got super close with. So I was bummed that they weren't there. And it was interesting. It was actually some of the couples I would say we expected. Like, definitely branded and serene. I just, like, had a feeling going in that they would have hit it off.

And I wasn't surprised to see that. But almost all the other couples, I was shocked by. Who shocks you the most when we walk down those steps? All of them. All of them. Johnny and Victoria Fuller, I think, was the biggest shock. Yes, that one was interesting. Definitely.

I'm trying to think of it. who else and that was the thing because I feel like okay let me think of who else was coupled up so we had Michael and Danielle I was not shocked by that that one made sense to me that makes a lot of sense they are cute together and one of my favorite things Danielle's actually said that made me verbally say all like that was not a willing thing it just came out of my body but when Danielle was saying that she wants to be there both for Michael oh yeah and James yeah like my my freaking heart Are you kidding me? That was amazing.

So I'm glad to see they're going well. We had Cheney and Joey. Sheney and Joey, yep. I didn't expect that one. I didn't even, I had no idea who the twins. I, like, kind of, well, when we went down there, we didn't know who the twins were. Because Michelle and Gap, or, whoa, Gabby and Rachel's season hadn't aired yet. So we were shocked by them.

Brittany and Tyler, Brittany and Tyler seemed good together. They were really cute together. and C and Andrew So that was the thing Like when we saw them They seemed great together They were holding hands As they were walking away

So to Thomas and I right away We're like Oh they've It seemed like they had been together For a while A lot longer than the two days That we'd later found out Yeah

Yeah And we And like from what we gather Just from talking with everyone The whole Gessania Andrew relationship Didn't really seem like a relationship It didn't seem strong

just kind of seemed like, you know, they had given each other their roses, but it was very noncommittal, not serious. And so we thought him and NC were, fast forward to the end of the night, though, we had some conversations separately. And I could tell. We both could tell, I think, Andrew was not over Teddy. Absolutely. Like, he was still bringing up Teddy, even though Teddy wasn't there and, like, had left three, what, three or four weeks earlier prior to that. And I was like, why are you still talking about Teddy if she's been gone? this long so it makes sense in hindsight of like why he finally removed himself and went home because he needed that closure from her absolutely and it's in his body language i mean look at when he's

talking to the girls up until nc he's not even making eye contact he's sort of laying in the middle of dog piles of other couples and he's somewhat isolated he wasn't living smiley face on the big toe andrew he was he was sad face on the big toe andrew okay let me ask you this then because we both know Andrew and let me just preface this to all of our listeners who don't know Andrew. He was on tour with me for the first week, but he was actually there with me longer because we had rehearsals because he was our first bachelor when I was on tour with him. And he was the kind of guy that he would be talking to everyone. He would be in the office with the crew laughing and joking. And I would be like down the hall working and I would just

hear Andrew laughing so hard. He was like, what's the word, magnanimous, like with everyone. He just infectious, so charismatic, so fun loving, can kick it with anyone, just have a good time. So knowing that about him, do you think if, I mean, obviously the premise of paradise is to find a partner, hopefully fall in love, hopefully get engaged or break up and then get engaged later on, you know, who's to say? But, but do you think had. he'd just been on that beach like without the pressure of having to date anyone like without like having the pressure of like am I going to give my rose and get my rose from jacenia and that I felt like he could have lived on that beach and had the best time and had such a better

experience if it was how do I want to say it like does that make sense like if it was more relaxing and like not not like he felt forced to be with somebody I felt for Andrew one of the things that really led to his need for clarity with Teddy as well was not only his own anticipation, but just the external anticipation around it. I mean, even in his conversation with NC, he mentioned, oh, yeah, I kind of know who you are. And let's call a spade a spade. These contestants, they know who each other are. Yeah. They are looking at each other's Instagrams and they have an idea. And not only that, there's a lot of people in the world who have ideas for the people going on that beach. There was so much pressure leading into the star

of the season for Teddy and Andrew to be a thing, both on Andrew himself and just the world around them, I feel like that's such a hard, almost burden to walk into. It's hard enough to be on that beach. So are you saying because of that, because of social media and I don't want to say researching people, but knowing about them beforehand, like that kind of set him up for failure? I would say the expectation that people can create on others through their perspective of what they were on a short sample on screen can really mess someone up if that person in reality doesn't match up to what they created in their mind. Yeah.

And for Andrew, I think that's exactly what happened and why things went so sideways and he needs that clarity so badly because it will rock your world down there. And Andrews, like you said, he's magnanimous. He's just this bigger than life personality and to see him down like that, that really hurt him yeah and again he just didn't have that closure because even when we talked to him and he had brought up what happened between him and teddy and how she just kind of left like he even said that like when they were together things were great and it was like certain times when the cameras were around like you know when certain conversations like were being filmed he's like that was

kind of weird like I could tell she was maybe a little bit more uncomfortable and not used to that and didn't necessarily like the cameras but he's like when they weren't around and it was just the two of them. He made it seem like the relationship was great. And I think he really was completely shocked that she just up and left and didn't really. I mean, I know that they kind of had a conversation, but I don't think at that point she was like, I'm leaving goodbye. Like she just kind of left him in the dust and he was still reeling from that weeks later.

Well, it just shows how difficult it is to actually put yourself out there and be vulnerable and go down onto that beach. I mean, a lot of the guys who we know bigger than life off the cameras, it's hard. And I just want people to really realize that these people are opening their hearts out and they're doing it in a very, very public way. And it is hard. Yeah. And we definitely know, like out of the guys that were closest to that it was, I think just what you said, it was harder than they expected. I think they went down and being like, it's going to be such a fun summer. we will be with our friends we'll meet some beautiful smart fun women we'll have drinks flowing

we'll get tan we'll go swimming and it was so much more than that that i think it really rocked them well that's one of the beauties about paradise because you have you get rocked well not necessarily that but you have these core group of guys who had such an amazing experience on their seasons of the bachelorets and then when they go to paradise it's a new it's an entirely new ball game And then you have people like me who I hated my experience on The Bachelorette. It was one of the worst six-month windows I think I personally had to live through, filming it, not knowing what's going on, and having to wade through those waters after the fact. And when I got to paradise, and I told you this when we're on that beach, I would have lived through that a million times over if it meant that I was able to live the life we are to. day. And that's why I think it's it's it's watching these back and being down on that beach and

just living in our dynamic and also vicariously through the people that we know close on that beach. It really just solidified things just the way that I feel and how much I applaud everyone who opens themselves up down there because it's not easy. It is so hard. Yeah. I mean, something that I always want are listeners and the viewers of the show to keep in mind. It's like you see, we say this over and over, you see two hours, well, in this case, four hours, once a week of things that are being filmed 24-7. It's so much more. No one, unless you're there, will ever be able to understand. But it really, really, really is as fun as it is, too, and as worthwhile as it can be. It's hard. It's the transition off the show back into the real

world too is difficult it's just it's a lot so I'm feeling for a lot of these people right now but let's get into the fun stuff because it wasn't all tears when we were there there was a lot of laughs and dancing and 90s goodness to come from some of this week um we Thomas and I were there we filmed all day yeah we filmed all day and we didn't even say for the whole thing We left early. We fell asleep downstairs by Wells because it was just everything was just going on so much longer. I think a lot of it had to do with the conversation between Giacenia and Andrew and then Andrew and C. So we just tapped out.

We're like, mom and dad are too old for this. We cannot. It is past May night. I need to go to bed. But in context, that made Andrew saying, dude and bro so much to NC in that breakup. So much more relatable. He's like, dude. And then insert, it's 4 a.m.

I got to get out of you. Dude, I can't do it. I'm broken. I'm tired. I need to go to bed. At that point, he was like, these relationships are done. There's less than a week left of paradise. Let me get some sleep and just tap out early.

I totally understand. He was emotionally, physically, everything just drained, exhausted. Yeah. Which is so sad because we spent a good chunk of the night with him and he was so upbeat. They were having a great time until just sending you pulled him. It was such a good time. It's celebrating the music's great. people are having fun there's different events

it was so fun to relive the 90s nostalgia too because we had just celebrated your 30th birthday which was 90s themed and the night I swear it was the best decade we could go on and on about

our love for the 90s I think half the people there didn't even live through half of the 90s which is unfortunate Michael went to his first Sadie's Hawkins in 1998 yeah good for him we it was so fun and it was being with Wells, too. Like, it was, it was cool. We've, we've obviously seen Wells like in his bartending role down there and, like, the guy that we could go to for advice and jokes and just

to talk, but seeing him, and there was a lot that got cut out. I think just either we were terrible at hosting or just due to timing. I'm going to just chalk it up to the timing with all the drama. But, like, we actually kicked off the night. And Wells is like such a pro at the one liners, at the welcomes like it was cool to see him in that element too that was something we hadn't necessarily really seen before i guess yeah wells does a lot more than bartend that is yeah very apparent he's a he's a trooper he stayed through the end he did not tab out early so poor went out for wells because he puts up with a lot what were some of the highlights you saw during the 90s party like what was the coolest thing to you i think just for me personally it was seen how

especially the girls, but the guys, too, were going to style themselves and accessorize because I wish everyone would have known that this was coming because I feel like we could have gone all out. You know, it's like everyone kind of made do with what they had in the moment. But it was cool to kind of see old school styles come back. That's what I liked. And then just the music and like the phrases that we used back in the day.

The dance moves. The dance moves. the dance off. The men killed that. I'm giving it to the men. I will say, if you all saw that in real life, the men crushed it. They had a moment where Tyler jumped back and was cradle in everyone's

arms and they threw him 10 feet in the air and he landed like a superhero. They crushed it. It was so good. I liked the character. I really wish we would have gotten our character how do you say? Character. Characatures. Carricature. Our drawing. My ears are big enough in

real life. I don't need that. that hit to the you have nice ears your ears aren't that big let's do a caricature and let's see what you say you're going to look at me differently forever

okay we'll get one done yeah we wanted to do one there we just ran at the time you were able though to spend more time with the guys and just have your man chats if you will

who did you that you didn't know that you met that night really surprised you that you liked well I spent a lot of my time talking to the people that I know the majority of my conversations were with Michael, Andrew, and Aaron. And I just wish we could have known that's what they were arguing about the day before.

Because when I'm talking to Aaron, first thing I say, I'm like, bro, you're talking to girls this time around. I'm so proud of you. I'm happy for you. And then he tells me he's in love and Michael's rolling his eyes and he's laughing. I'm like, all right, what's going on? Michael Spillots him. And he goes, he is in the most dysfunctional relationship I have ever seen in my life. And then everyone starts laughing, Aaron included.

That was the consensus of what everyone was telling us, though. We had no, someone could tell you something, and until you see it, there is no grasping the depths of that non-nector. They, yeah, when we went down there, I will say we weren't shocked to see them together, obviously because of what happened at the tell-all with, when Cheney called out Genevieve for, like, what was it, like, hooking up with Aaron? Allegedly. Allegedly.

But, so we weren't shocked. I was like, of course they're going to be together after that storyline. Like, that would be such a missed opportunity if they weren't. So we weren't shocked by that. But they looks, they physically look good together. They have almost two similar personalities. And it's like, what happens when you put dynamite in a barrel with some more dynamite? You get Genevieve Van Aaron.

Painfully. Painfully it's, that was, that was the consensus. Painfully it's. Yeah, it was. But yeah, everyone that we had talked to, they're like, their relationship, man. We don't know if they're together. when they're not together, if they're happy, if they're not happy. It just, I think we left being like,

I don't think they're going to work out in the real world. It was not a thought. It was, there is no way in heck. That also is a good transition to conversation with Michael and Danielle. It's more than just a relationship with a significant other. It's bringing someone else in to be a potential mother figure to his son. Yes. And I was asking him about that.

And he was, he was all in on Danielle. However, he's very reserved to the point where he's only said, I love you to one person on this planet. And that is his wife, Laura, up until that point. Really? Have he said that before? Has he said that he's only told one other person he's loved them? That's what he told me. When we're sitting there.

Oh, okay. Michael, in his life to that point, when we're having that conversation, he had only said, I loved you to one other person on the planet. And the fact that when we're talking, he's saying you can see a future outside of there with Danielle and what that looks like, that made me have sore cheeks just from smiling because that's a powerful thing. So that was the conversation with Michael and I was elated to hear it. But he hadn't told Danielle he loved her. That's what I'm saying. The only person he has ever said he's loved. But that he was getting to that point with Daniel. He never used the word

love, but he was saying he was getting to a point where... Like getting close. Gotcha. Just close with her. Or just like on that trajectory. potentially yeah okay we'll have to see what because I don't know how that one ends but that was just cool to see as far as conversations that we had there okay gotcha and then Andrew he was just going through it yeah we've been over it sad big toe Andrew sad big toe he was happy big toe the first couple days on the beach and then sad big toe is that a is that a sane he literally drew a happy face on his toe he win literally one of the first days the image of Andrew's foot is unfortunately just seared into my brain now. I don't remember this at all. He drew a happy, a happy face on his

toe. Yeah. What did I miss? He had open, exposed feet to the world to see. Wow. Thank God you didn't do that because your feet are nasty. I have one ugly foot. Okay, fine. I'll wear. Yeah. Yeah. our experience just together down there because it was kind of like a walk through memory memory lane we we obviously walked everywhere on that beach we revisited some of our favorite places we had like one specific day bed where we would always have our little like conversations or mini dates and so we of course went to go lay there we laid on the big bubba bed where we used to take naps with everyone we got our favorite foods our favorite drinks we saw our favorite bartenders and chefs, what was, like, your highlight, your favorite thing that you saw or that you

really wanted to do when you were there? I just wanted to sit there and take it all in, and I had the chance to do that, and it was amazing. It was also nice sitting on the daybed than walking away, not crying, like when we left Paradise. That was a pretty good feeling, and I hope a lot more people this season get to experience that, though coming full circle and me dealing that with you. That was pretty cool. That was our test, honey. look at us now. Ooh, oh, ooh, we have to share the butterfly story. Oh, my gosh.

We have to share the butterfly story. And I'm going to let you tell it, but basically, Thomas is going to tell you his side of this story. And when we were there, the complete opposite now happened. And the fact that we were together to experience it as an engaged couple was, like, there are very few moments in life where you, like, get the chills and you're like, oh, my gosh. Like, there's something greater at work here. And I think that was one of those moments for us. So you just tell the people what you experienced last year and this year. So this is the final day heading into overnight.

Last year. Last year. Yeah. And we're separated. The men are in their areas. The women are in their quarters. And we're all just waiting to see what happens. For me, in my heart, in my mind, I'm like, I want to leave this beach with Beck.

And I want to make sure she knows that I know we're not ready for engagement. I know it's going to take time. But I just want to be able to have that time. And in my head and my heart, I know that's what's going to be. And while I'm sitting there just thinking about what I want to say to, or I look up and I see a butterfly, just fly into the room and land on the wall directly across from me. And the reason why that's important is in Latin culture. But it is a black butterfly. I'm getting there.

Oh, sorry. In Latin culture, there is an omen of a black butterfly of death. And if this butterfly lands on a house or within like a loved one or something of that nature, it means... On a loved one? Oh, you don't want that. But it represents imminent death is near. And for me, I'm already uncertain going into this conversation. I'm about to have with Becca.

And right when I see that black butterfly come in and just lands directly across from me, it completely just sunk into me. it completely just absorbed my bone. I was just like, oh, man, this is not going to be good. She's going to break up with me. Lo and behold, me, no. And you said that, like, weren't you talking to Joe or Kenny at that point? And I looked, yes. Oh, my gosh.

So this butterfly comes in. I have this revelation. I'm like, she's breaking up with me. I know what it is. The universe just told me. So I look over to Joe. And going back to his experience, I said, hey, Joe. Remember that time that you.

were down here and you and Kendall broke up. He was like, yeah. What, what, what? It's like, uh, what'd that look like when you guys got back together? What do you mean? Well, I think I'm about to get dumped and I want to do anything I can to make sure that this isn't goodbye. And then we went down.

I got dumped. And yeah. So going full circle a year later, what happens when we're leaving paradise this time? So as we're leaving paradise, that's the. Pacific Resort. We had spent the day there, talked to everyone, like had our special moments alone on that beach, and we're about to get into our car to take us away. And this, truly the biggest butterfly I've ever seen, flew by, but it was a white butterfly this time. Literally, we're hand in hand. About to leave. And we were already smiling, joking,

because we were like, we get to leave together this time, no more tears. And this butterfly. And this butterfly just comes and flies right on over us. And we, I think we got a video of it, maybe if we did all share it on Instagram. But it was such a crazy, cool moment. Like, and Thomas had obviously shared the butterfly, the black butterfly story to me months ago. Like, you know, when we first got back together after the big breakup. But yeah, like I said, just a moment that you truly feel like something bigger is at play in this universe. And that It was just the sign we needed. And so I think that was probably like the most cool, my favorite memory of when we were down there this time around.

That was amazing. That was probably one of the moments where it just hits you in the chest. You're like, wow. Yeah. Yeah, this is, this place is special. Yeah, it was. And I don't think too many people leave that beach, like regardless of how people's stories end, whether it's good or bad, I don't think. very many people leave and like want to come back and you are one of those people that are like,

I would stay at this resort. I love it here. It's so magical. And so yeah, to be able to go back and spend a few days there and a day with the cast was really exciting for us. So I don't need to do what Ashley and Jerry did and stay in the boom boom room. Like that's not for me anymore. But one day was good. Well, when we have kids, there's a chance we're going to be begging to go down there for a week. I was like, guys, please. Somebody take our kids, let us go. Yeah, I could be speaking too soon.

We might have kids in a couple years and need to go and stink up the boom boom room like they did. Done. Let me ask you this. So Thomas doesn't know too much about the spoilers. So who do you think will end up leaving together as a couple and who, what relationships do you think might not make it? Well, I'll say, I think they should have Brann and Serene get engaged

like two weeks ago and just let them have fantasy suites for the last month of paradise. They could have gotten in the boom boom room. All them, like they were, they should have just let That's one thing we learned. No one went to the boom boom room. And it is true. And when we were there on the beach, I feel like

so many couples were going to the boom boom room. Yeah. Yeah. It got, maybe the the springs were a little too used in. We don't want those. broken in. Okay, so, okay, see, definitely Brandon Serene. If, if they, if shoot, if they're not married, they'll probably get married the same time we do. You think? Yeah. They might already

be married. Who knows? There's a chance. I would, oh man. Yeah, that's a given. I, I will say, I don't, I hope Michael and Danielle are together. I hope they're able to figure something out just because I don't know much about Danielle. In fact, I don't know anything about Danielle. Yeah. But I know Michael's a type of person who really deserves that level of happiness. And I know James, he wants that for his family as well, which is an incredible thing. He's a little kid, and he's super aware. So I hope they work out. I hope Andrew gets whatever clarity he needs.

So that was tough. I hope Rodney's Bachelor. Yep, I agree. I'll second that. We can do two seasons in one year. We've done it before. We could do it again. I don't see the twins leaving in a relationship.

I can't picture. There's no way. Yeah, definitely not. We like Brittany and Tyler. I could see them leaving together. Definitely, Aaron and Genevieve will not last much longer. Kate Logan won't last either. Unfortunately, those two relations seem very short-lived to me.

Definitely. Okay. what is any advice that you would give people who well okay how about this that you would give to couples who are now still together like going through this they're about to be like public now their relationship will be all over who can finally like scream it from the rooftops what advice would you give to them this is advice that i hope isn't coming too late and i'm speaking from our own experience. The best advice I could give to a couple leaving that beach is in that time when you're not allowed to be out in the open and out in public and really putting yourself in that

relationship out there. Make sure you're doing everything you can to build that relationship on a pillar of stone and not sand. What I mean by that is when you're on that beach and you don't have a care in the world and life is not going to get better than that moment, it's really easy to not have those pivotal and important conversations about who we are, who do we want to be, who do we want to be together. And when you have that alone time off the beach and real life creeps in, make sure you're taking every opportunity you can to spend that quality time and have those conversations and have the intentionality to start shaping that life that you both agree on for us we spent the first four months in secrecy having small picnics and having super

in-depth intimate conversations and playing games and playing with the dogs and really when you look at our lives today it's so similar to those original early moments we had when we left the beach and to have that continuity off of the conversations off of the actions off of the ideals that's would allow us to be planning a marriage and planning for a future. I agree. We had the luxury and maybe and maybe it was like a little bit the fact that like you were so mature and ready to find somebody and like really be a partner. And maybe I had some understanding of like, because I had already gone through it a couple

times of like how everything was going to feel when it was publicized of like we really sat down and like were ourselves like this is who I am this is what I want this is what I'm hoping for but like we didn't really have to like lie about who we were because we at that point we're like if it doesn't work out it doesn't work out and no one's going to know and if it does that's going to be great but to just stay true to who you are as an individual and what you want in a partnership who you're looking for what qualities like align and so that I think is so so So important. One thing, too, that actually we should just share with anyone, whether you are just starting to date somebody or you've been dating for a while, there is a game that I don't remember who recommended it to me, but it's called we're not really strangers. And it is one of the best ways to get to know somebody. It's, what was there, like three different categories. And it's three different levels. Yeah, three different levels. And it's just really, really intense. intentional questions that help you get to know the person you're sitting across the table with.

And it was so beneficial for us. And so we would just spend like a couple nights. The interesting about that is we actually never got past the first level or finished even close to someone's of a round. No, we got to like two, didn't we? We would do like three to four cards. And then our conversation would naturally just take on its own form. That's true. Let's put him to the side. Yeah. Yeah. So it's such a great game i highly highly recommended this is not even like an ad i'm going to call you out right here name four questions from that because we pulled it out and it was a great concept we never used it i have one in my wallet i saved one special one yeah um it's called we're not really strangers again this is not an ad this is i'm not doing a promotion with them unless they want to pay me

in the future but it was such a good game so beneficial highly highly highly recommend um So for any couples in Paradise who are together now and still in hiding, pick up that game, take it for a spin one or two nights, and you will not be disappointed. But now, Tommy, it's the time because you are such a good supporter. And I know you listen to this podcast that we got to share the resources. So you know how this works. But to any listeners who are new to Happy Hour, we here think it's so important for every. everyone to stay informed and just be held accountable. So we are sharing resources on this podcast and then also on our Instagram accounts that anyone can go to and find and pull up and

either quickly listen to or watch or purchase as a book. So I will let you start this time, Tommy. Okay. Take it away. The resource that I want to talk about today, it is a book. The book is called The Color of Law. The Color of Law is by Richard Rothstein. And what is entails, it's a deep dive through why geographic boundaries happen. And what I mean by geographic boundaries is what Richard Rosson goes into is why do we have predominantly black communities? Why do we have a disparity between school systems? Why do we have a disparity in potential job opportunity? Why is it so much harder for the African-American community? in minority communities to surpass the obstacles in their way from where they live and what

their surroundings are. And what Richard Rossin does is he goes into an actual empirical breakdown of different governing policies, different procedures, and different just community, I'm going to use the word mishaps that led to these minority-driven, just redlined areas. And to push that dialogue further, I'm actually going to give away four copies of the book. Anyone who is interested in learning more about the different plights that minorities, specifically African-American community, has faced when it comes to where they live in the communities that have essentially been created for them. Send me a picture with a drawn-on mustache. And we started, I have a mustache

on. I have to figure out who to give these books to somehow. And I'm going to send you a copy. You don't just want them to DM you and send you like a reason of why they would want to read it or like what they're hoping to learn from it or takeaways or who they could share it with. That's a lot better of an idea than what I came up with. But we're giving away four books. Yeah. Okay. Send me a message saying the color of law. What you want to learn. from it and who you would share that information with and we will choose for people to send those books to you could do a post on instagram make it easy sir i overcomplicated that yeah we got this okay well find them on instagram again this is not a famous plug but that's i like that i like

that you're continuing to pass it on and move it forward that's good we haven't had any anyone on the podcast that has done that so kudos you get extra brownie points tonight thomas i hope i get actual Brown. Okay. So the one I'm going to share this week, the resource I'm sharing is it's a movie that came out several years ago. And it's so good. I watched it with my mom. It was in the midst of COVID. It was when I was going through my breakup. And, you know, it was like in the middle of the Black Lives Matter movement. And the movie is called The Hate You Give. And it's, to be honest, I don't know if it's on Netflix or how you can find it. Just do a quick Google search. I will share it on my Instagram stories and try to find a link for everyone, but it's basically about the main character is this young woman growing up in high school, and she goes to a predominantly white, prestigious private school, but she lives in a mainly black community that's obviously less wealthy, less privilege, just a lot less means. And so it's kind of like her navigating through this life as a young woman.

You know, high school is not easy for anyone. And kind of bouncing between like her identity, like how, like when she feels like she assimilates more with the black community and the white community and trying to fit in at this like prestigious school. It's really, really powerful. It's really special. Have you watched it? I have not. You haven't? Well, shit.

Now I know what we can watch tonight for movie night. But it's called The Hate You Give. it will move you to tears it's so beautifully done I don't I don't remember who the director is I can find it really quick but that is the one again I will share it on my Instagram as well just like Tommy will do with his and that is the resource section for the podcast thanks Thomas and now

you my friend get to do your Rose and Thorn and you can do it I'll let you do it like either this whole season of paradise or of just this week, whatever you feel like. Okay, I will do this week. And my thorn would be the conversations the beach was having about the age difference between Mara, flow, and the twins. And the reason why that's a thorn to me is I look at, I'm going to use Joe and Serena again. There's an age difference there, and they've created such a beautiful life together. Why is it when a woman comes in who's older and she goes to take out these young strapping lads that now it's an issue?

Oh, are you saying like me? Yeah. And you're my young strapping lad? I will call. Yes, exactly. Okay. So to me, that wasn't a fair conversation to be had. I mean, Mara and Flo, they're out here doing everything they can to be open the relationships.

Yeah, they were in a tough spot. Yeah, they took out the youngest guys. So what? Mm-hmm. Good for them. Good for them. good for them and my rose love knows no age my rose is based in in a reality that i don't know is real but it's entertaining for me to believe that it's real and that is when eliza went to visit

justin and baltimore i was so just captivated by the cloth coverings justin had on his couches and the reason why i was really drawn to those is because justin is a painter and i am convinced he has those cloth couch it covers because he paints people people on those couches. Like a French girl? Just like a French girl. So my rose is... That is your rose?

My rose is the hypothetical paintings of people Justin has done on his cloth covered couches. Not even the butterfly. That is your rose? Not the chicken. Maybe I want Justin to paint me. I don't know. Oh, my.

Okay. Well, ladies and gents, you heard it from Thomas first. Justin, please let Thomas know where those couch cloth covers are because... I don't care about the couch cloth covers are. couch cloths. I care about the painting that happens on the couch cloths, the hypothetical painting. I need to see what these look like now. It's all I could stare at

the entire scene. This is such the difference between us. Thomas pays attention to the littlest of details and I don't see shit. The little details open up a world of possibilities like just in painting people on them. Wow. It's amazing.

We got to call him after this and see if he has painted portraits on that couch or if he has those clock covers for other reasons we will hopefully find out very soon that might have been the weirdest rose you've ever gotten here 1,000% of it's because I'm a sunflower guy I don't know what to tell you oh yeah okay well Thomas it was so much fun having you thank you my dear you're welcome back anytime I think I'll keep you um this is so funny everybody thank you so much Thomas it was a blast having you on but the biggest things goes out to all of our Bachelor Happy Hour listeners. You know, we couldn't be here every week without all of you. So thank you, thank you. Thank you. And please make sure to tune in next week for the season finale. Holy crap. It's already the finale of Bachelor in Paradise, both Monday and Tuesday on ABC or stream on Hulu. And make sure it is up on all social. You can follow us at Bachelor Happy Hour on Instagram. And from there, you'll find everything you need to know to follow us on Twitter and TikTok. And for the Prime members out there, you can listen to Badger Happy Hour ad free on Amazon.

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He doesn't think it's a problem, but I don't trust her. Now he's insisting we get to know each other, but I just want her gone. Hold up. Isn't that against school policy? That seems inappropriate. Maybe find out how it ends by listening to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, we're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome.

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