Bachelor Happy Hour - Demi Burnett: Sometimes You Have to Kill the Vibe | Golden Hour

Episode Date: May 8, 2026

Today on “Golden Hour,” we’re back for part two with Demi, where we dive into some of your questions all about dating. Between navigating dating as a bisexual to unlearning your toxic attachment styles, dating is tough and sometimes you have to kill the vibe. Demi is helping you learn how to set boundaries and advocate for yourself. We also play a round of “Am I the Problem?” where we give Demi real dating prompts and she helps us assess who the problem is. We’re diving in deep and getting real about today’s dating culture, so tune in now and be sure to subscribe! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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and they want to be an actor or whatever. My first thing is always, can you think of anything else that you can do rather be to support. do that. David O'Yelloo. I love this podcast, whether it's therapy or relationships or religion or sex or addiction or you just go straight for the guts. Dennis Leary, Gaten Moderato from Stranger Things,

Tena Mongeau, Camilla Morone, Carrie Kenny Silver, and more. Listen to these episodes of Dear Chelsea on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everybody. We're back for part two with Demi. Let's get right into it. So every week, Demi, we do some bachelor, we do some questions from our listeners. And we give them some expert golden advice. You are not a golden, but we would love you to join in. I'm a golden head. Yeah, okay. So are you ready to join in when we give these questions? Sure. All right. Go for it, Susan. All right. Here's the first one. Hi, Kathy and Susan and Demi. I love your podcast so much.

Anyway, I'm bisexual, and I've noticed when I date men, they sometimes treat it like a fantasy or don't take it seriously. It makes me feel misunderstood. How do I set boundaries around that without it killing the vibe early on? And her name is Candice, and she's from Vermont. Kansas, my, Kansas, Candice, my love, Candice, my love. I think you, like, you can say, like, set your boundary, like, hey, this isn't a fantasy, and I don't like that.

And if it kills the vibe, okay, who cares? You're going to kill the vibe in life sometimes. It happens. And if the person, though, doesn't respond to that well, then see ya, Bucco, see ya. The boundary is, if you don't respect this, then I leave. There is no me trying to convince you because you cannot convince someone. Like, no. You have the respect, the self-respect comes from like walking away when someone else is not

respecting you after you've asked. And you know what I love about what you just said, Demi, that extends beyond bisexual, polyamorous. It doesn't matter what we're talking about. Mutual respect. Everything you just said, appropriate boundaries, mutual respect. that's in any relationship and hit the road bucko for any of those reasons not just bisexual so yay you i love that hell yeah all right canis let us know we want to hear what happens on apologetically authentically

authentically yourself there you go all right here's the next one my girls and now you're one of us demi i feel like i'm stuck in this cycle of almost relationships i'll meet someone we hit it off immediately. We're texting all day, going on dates, sleeping over. It feels like a relationship in every way, except the title. And then around the two to three month mark, they pull back or say they're not ready. It's happened three times in a row now. I can't tell if I'm picking the wrong people or if I'm doing something that makes them not want to commit. At what point do you stop giving someone the benefit of the doubt and just walk away. And this is from Chelsea in Los Angeles.

So what do you think, Demi? What do you say for Chelsea? Chelsea, you immediately give up giving them the benefit of the doubt. Immediately out of there. Benefit of the doubt, gone. Every man should be proving to you how he isn't like the others. Because he should know that how they are all acting right now. And it's like that.

They're so sketchy and they don't give you clear answers. and it's all them just trying to do this with multiple women, and it's gross, and it's confusing for us. So men should be aware of that and be like, okay, I'm going to show her how I'm not like that because she, you know, the second a woman shows like a sign of an insecurity or something, it's like, oh, yeah, I understand why you think that because every guy out here is a dirt bag treating you like you aren't really a human

and you're just like there for his pleasure. But I'm not, like here's how I don't want to do that. Go ahead. Okay, wait, I want to be. You should ask a question. Are we in a relationship? Like when do you, she's guessing until the end? Like I didn't get that.

Yeah. How does she, should you have a conversation about are we in a committed relationship? No. No. So when do you? He's not doing that. If he's not doing that, then just stop immediately. Immediately stop all communication.

And he'll probably start crawling on his hands and knees begging for you back if you all of a sudden like cold ghost him. but chances are he might actually if you're in L.A., he's got another vagina. He's planning on a lot more than later. Okay, but wait, Demi, God, do you love how much she loves men? I can't get, I just, it is seeping through every comment you make, your love of all things male. But here's my question. If, if, I'm just going to play devil's advocate like I do with Susan a lot.

If Chelsea, is that her name, Chelsea, if Chelsea is quote unquote, sleeping with the guy, texting, cooking for him, going on dates. I hate to be the old golden here. You know, why should he buy the cow when he's getting the milk for free? Like, if she's doing all that, she's giving him everything he wants with nothing in return. So, well, yeah, but that's, but I think Susan's right. She needs to either slow her role and not be, you know, so eager to please or have the conversation.

Look, we're going on dates. We're sleeping together. spend a lot of time at each other's places. Are we in a committed relationship? I think you have to have that conversation. I think the guy, if the guy has that in mind, he's going to say it to you. He's going to bring it up without you ever having to question it. Like I really do.

Have you met the men today, Demi? Well, I'm talking about the last relationship I was in. He loved bombed the shit out of me. But, but, um, I mean, I never, I never questioned ever what we were, how he felt about me, anything like that. And it was because he really wanted me and he wanted me to feel secure and wanted me, probably because he wanted me to make him feel that way. Oh, God, you're so smart, damn. You're so smart. You spend a lot of time by yourself, you know, getting to know what's wrong with you or

like what's going on in your brain. And it helps you not only like understand yourself, but like I said, others and have a lot of compassion. It's like you understand why people are in a bad mood. You know, you're not just like, wow, that person's a jerk. You're like, this has nothing to do with me. Yeah. Most things don't. At the current question, though, at what point do you stop giving someone the benefit of the doubt and walk away?

When you feel it's time. I think that the second you're wondering if you need to give them the benefit of the doubt or not is when you need to back it up. You need to back it up. Then you start questioning yourself, just like you said earlier. When you're starting to question, excuse me, like you said about Taylor, maybe that's why she took all those roses back. When she starts getting in her own head, why is that person making me feel this way?

Yeah. You know, I'm feeling a certain way because of, then exactly. Yeah, because I know that feeling. And I, if the second I get that feeling, I'm out. I'm out. We got, Chelsea, you got to let us know if Demi, if you took our advice and you're out, like Demi said. I think let us know, Chelsea. And Chelsea, no more cooking for people unless they have seriously committed to you.

Like a ring on it. You go like, I love to call for people. And I'd be like, listen, I don't do this for anybody. So let's sit down and have a conversation. And Demi's in my case, we don't do it. Even if the guy puts a 10-carat ring on our hand. That just means I'm going to make more reservations than I did before. That means he can afford a private chef for us.

Damn right. I'm with you, Demi, all the way. Okay. The next one is from Anna from San Francisco. Hey, my golden queens. I've noticed that I tend to lose. interest right after someone starts showing real interest in me. In the beginning, I'm excited and invest it. But the second it becomes clear that they like me back, something in me shuts off.

It's like I only want what feels uncertain. I know that's probably not healthy, but I don't know how to change it. Where do you even start with something like that? Oh, baby, let me tell you. I have the next one. It's called avoidant attachment style. Right. Look into it. Look into avoidant attachment style. It'll help you.

She's got the textbook answer. Absolutely. 100 percent. I was thinking waiting for you to answer to her going, this check isn't avoidant. That's what she is. I'm an avoidant. So I gave it. Is that like emotionally unavailable?

Is it the same? It's, it's, um, when people, start to become too much and I I'm like ah like I just I want to run away and I I just it's like my freedom they value their freedom very very much um I think for me it's like it's like my autonomy I all of a sudden may get scared that I'm like going to be emotionally responsible for someone and I'm like I don't want to have to do that or like just I can make up any excuse it's just like closeness makes me want to run yeah what's your suggestion to help her what she if you become aware of it it helps a lot just knowing that like why you're doing it and then you can explain

it to other people as well. Like if you're in a relationship of someone and you do think this is a good person for you or you're like starting to get in a relationship, but you feel that feeling. You can maybe explain, hey, I'm an avoidant attachment style. Like it's not you. I promise this is not personal. But like here's maybe how you can help me. Like give me some space for the next few days.

You know, maybe make me miss you. You know, like work with me on it. Right. Yeah. I think Demi, you are 100% right on the money. So Anna, find out what an avoidant is, and you might get the answers to your question. IHeart Radio is throwing it back. 20s, the decade.

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There's the worst singer in the group. The worst? Yeah. Me. Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, you only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The yard birds, right? That's the name.

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You for me, I need some jokes to make me seem funny. Jacob Kingston grew up in an isolated polygamous sect. We were God's chosen kingdom on earth. He felt destined for greatness. So when a swaggering Armenian businessman catapults Jacob into an extraordinary world, he doesn't look back. Ferraris and Lamborghinis, private jets, meeting the president of Turkey. I'm Michelle McPhee, and this is one of the most.

shocking criminal conspiracies I've ever come across. When Jacob met Levan, this went to a billion dollar fraud. But with two kings from entirely different worlds, just how long can their empire survive? The largest tax investigation in American history. You need to tell me what you know. Is somebody coming after me? Jacob told Levan, you're ruining my life.

Listen to Kingdom of Fraud, starting on May 12th, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. We share stories and scientific insights to help us all better.

navigate these periods of turbulence and transformation. There is one finding that is consistent, and that is that our resilience rests on our relationships. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your husband is not who you think he is. Your body is not what you saw it was. Your identity is formed by a secret history. I'm Danny Shapiro, and these are just a few of the stunning stories I'll be exploring on the 14th season of Family Secrets. And just then, we felt the plain turn in the air, so much so that the bags that were under people's seats just kind of flew into

the aisle. Each week, we dive head first into the complex power of secretes. how it shapes our identities and relationships, and how it ultimately can reveal to us our truest selves. My daughter, she's pretending she doesn't know, but is trying to cook and feed me and keep me alive because I wasn't eating anything, and me pretending like everything was fine. He kind of shoved me out of the way and said, move.

And he went out the front door and he jumped in a car and drove off, and that was the last time I saw him. Listen to season 14 of Family Secrets on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your problem. podcasts. Let's move on. The last one is from Maxi in Arizona. Hi, Kathy and Susan and Demi. I'm 34 and I swear dating used to feel fun, but now every date feels like a job interview. Within 10 minutes, I'm thinking about long-term compatibility, values, kids, timelines, and I can feel myself getting anxious instead of just enjoying the person in front of me. I don't want to waste time, but I also feel like I'm

running the experience for myself. How do you balance being intentional without putting so much pressure on every single day? I'll answer first. Go ahead. I don't know. For me, it was quite the opposite. I never thought about future. I was always in the moment. And a lot of times, I should have thought further because it didn't work out. But it's quite the opposite of what she's doing. Well, I think this dummy is called anxious attachment. Yeah. And there is one. You know, she gets anxious. So the minute she meets somebody, she's, she's glomming on to them. Maxie, I think, you know what's happening to me? My avoidant attachment style is being triggered. And I'm literally like going into shock. I was like, I don't know what's going on with her. I don't like it at all.

Yeah, I mean, she's, this is my guess. She's 34. She, she, she feels like it's a job interview because I think what she's not saying is, for her it is a job interview. She's looking for the guy to mate, to have kids, to build a life with, and she's feeling the time pressure, being 34, maybe to have kids. And so that's the anxious attachment. I got to do this. I got to do it now. If I don't do it now, it's not going to work out.

I've got to do it. That's anxious attachment. When you go on a date, though, you want to see if you're compatible, right? You want to see if you're having fun. But that's what she's saying. Within 10 minutes, Susan, she's thinking about those things, which to me is she's jumping the gun because she needs that attachment. she's looking for that guy to attach to.

And as opposed to an avoidant, she's the exact opposite. She's running to the altar. And he may run because of it. Maybe suggestion, could, if you could be a lesbian, it would be great because they are too hot.

That is, lesbians love that shit. There you go, Maxie. You could be anything you ought to be. I know. I know. But really just like, slow down. Enjoy the moment. And just go into all of it,

knowing like, hey, this might be a bust, but who cares, it's a free meal. You know, let's just think about that. This might, this might be a bust. Like, expect nothing, low expectations. Then all blows off the water. I love it. I love. All right, Maxie, let us know how it goes.

We really hope that, you know, you find the guy and that job interview turns into something else. Yeah. Okay. All right. You can submit your burning questions to us by all you have to do is go to battleination. dot com slash golden hour come back each week we love answering your questions and um who knows we may answer your question absolutely okay you're ready am i the problem this week demi is going to help us play a game called am i the problem we're going to give you some dating situations and she has to tell us whether

that person is the problem or not Are you with us? Yeah, I love it. I'm excited. Okay. I stopped texting back because they didn't double text. First of all, wait, what is a double text? You write a text, they don't answer.

You send another text. That's a double text. Instead of waiting for them to respond, you send multiple texts. So I stopped texting back. In other words, Susan, you write a guy a text and you say, hey, how are you doing today? He doesn't answer back. then you say, are you busy today?

That's double texting. And so the woman stops texting because he's not responding. I think that he double, she's upset that he didn't double text her. Right. Right. I gave the opposite example, but yes. He didn't do what she wanted.

Yes, yes. Right. Yes. Yes. Who's the problem? I mean, she's the problem. There you go. But I'm also like,

maybe no one's a problem because what happened? Like did no one end up ever texting again? Because maybe maybe then she did the right thing because now she saved them both from an incompatible relationship. There you got? All right. Here's the next one. I like that.

I like that dummy. Okay. I've been on. So is this person the problem or not? I've been on three dates with this person and they're great on paper. But I don't feel a spark. So I keep picking fights to see if there's passion. Picking fights?

That's toxic. She's the problem. Yeah. Absolutely. Well, we don't know. It could be a guy. Whoever you are person, you are the problem. Knock it off.

Raise your hand if we agree. Everyone's hands going up here. Okay. I check their Instagram. I check their Instagram following before agreeing to the date. Really? Here's the thing. I kind of think, though, that.

I respect a detective, a detective, you know, like someone doing their detective work. Like, I mean, I, okay. So if they have a huge following, you'll go on the date. But if they don't, you're like, oh, he's nobody. Oh, I thought that they meant that they meant that they looked at their following. Oh. So say I'm going on a date with a guy and I'm going to go look at his following to make sure he's not following Donald Trump before I go on a date. That's what I'm like, well, this is smart.

This is actually, could be very smart, not the problem at all. Actually, I like it. All right. How about the next one? I told them I hate games, but I definitely play them to keep things interesting. You're nasty. Stop that. You're the problem.

Yes, I agree. Debbie, I love you. I love you. I complain that I can't find a good partner, but I only swipe right on emotionally unavailable people. Am I the problem? Well, yes. How does she know they're emotionally unavailable? Well, I think-

They're emotionally unavailable. That's the thing, all right? Any man above a seven, forget about it. Forget about it. They are. Wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Explain Debbie.

No, no, no, no, wait. Explain what that means any man above a seven. They have the world handed to them at this point. Okay. If you're like an attractive male man, it is a rare commodity. All right. Us women, we are so beautiful. All of us are beautiful.

Okay? All of us are considered. a 10 in this room, all right? We can all be a 10. But a man, oh, we're lucky if we're getting a six. You know what I mean? Like the Bachelorette group of guys, there's like maybe one, nine in there every now and then, but like they're all pretty mid.

Like there aren't, but the Bachelor ladies, the most beautiful women you've ever seen in your life. That's true. I can tell you the golden men are mid. I mean, Susan, we weren't rolling over for that. Men are mid. Men are mid. So when there is an attractive man, like one who I'm like, oh, wow, he's so hot.

Oh, I know he is nothing but trouble because every woman is feeling that way and is just going to, I mean, my legs open. Give it to me. Like pathetic. You know what I mean? You are the problem and you better go for a seven or under, says then. Yeah. Yeah. You might have better luck.

Oh, God. Okay. This one is too good. because I don't know, the only zodiac sign I know is my own. I lost interest after finding out their zodiac sign. Problems? I mean, yeah, probably. Yeah, you're the problem.

Sorry, I was just thinking about it. I was like, what zodiac sign am I disgusted by enough that it would turn me off? And I couldn't think of one. So, yeah, they're the problem. Demi's going through month by month. Yep, nope, yep. I'm thinking, I'm like, would any of those really turn me off? You know, the one I kind of got a little caught up on Capricorn, but that was only because the

corn was in it. And then I was like, and I love Capricorns. I know so many that I love. Or you're thinking like maybe your ex was a certain sign and you find out this one's the same sign. That's the only what I wouldn't even think about that. Yeah. So I think you're the problem. I've had so many different experiences with people that are the same signs that it's like,

it has more to just do with that zodiac sign. You know, you got to look at the big three. What's the rising? Where's the moon? Okay. That's why I don't do it. You hear what she said? The moon, the rising, the seventh sun.

I'm like, it's too complicated. Just tell me when you're birthday, and I'll send you a card. That's all. We're done. Okay. I say it's fine when it's not fine. Gotta be direct. You're the problem.

You got to be direct because people are not mind readers. You cannot expect people to know what you're thinking and to do what you are expecting them to do because you would do that. Like you have to tell them. Isn't that one of our laws to be true to ourselves? Yeah. How do you expect to find happiness if you're not true to yourself, true to your word? Well, I think a lot of people here, I agree with you, Demi, what you said, but I think a lot,

and I hate to say it, it's mostly women, they're insecure and they say, it's fine, I'm good, it's fine, when really they're so pissed off, so disappointed, so angry, whatever the emotion is. trained to not be a problem. Women have been trained to solve problems, to fix everything, to manage the house, like to be the fixer. And it's not to ever disrupt things and to cause problems. We're trained to stay in line. And like, I mean, it's very, it's not obvious, but it's ingrained in our culture and our society. Yeah. We are pretty amazing, aren't we though? We do fix problems. We can do it all. We are more amazing than man in every way. Like, You're right.

I compare everyone I date to my ex. Yeah, you're the problem. Yes. Agreed. Go ahead, Kathy. Okay. I told them, oh, this is me. I told them I loved spontaneous plan.

Oh, no, I don't get annoyed. Okay, let me start over here. I told them I loved spontaneous plans. But every time they make one, I get annoyed because they already had a routine. Am I the problem? Hell yeah, you are. Because you don't like spontaneous plans. That's exactly right.

Yeah. Stop saying you like it. You don't. I love spontaneous plants. Yeah, exactly. To get surprised to do something like, yes. Yeah. I love it.

Spontaneous and routine are polar opposites. Absolutely. It does not like spontaneous. I expect them to plan every date. Show me a woman that expects that. Me because that's why we're single because they won't and I and I'm not settling for less. All right. You better have something.

I like to plan them because then you do something I want to do. I tell them what I want to do. I say I want to do something fun like a physical activity like we can go to pup pie where you go to amusement park. We can do anything like that or go painting or like something. Don't I can't sit there at the restaurant with you please. So I expect them to plan every date. Is she the problem? No.

Or he, it could be a male leader. If it's he, yes. If it's she, no. Oh, God, you kids. There's no double standards with Demi. Let me just say, I find it very attractive if a man plans dates. But what I find irritating, and this has happened to me many times, men, you know, they say one thing and do another, right? Oh, I love to do spontaneous dates.

I love to do hike and I love to play golf. And you're dating them and they're like, no, they really don't. They just, you know, they don't really want to go play golf or hike because, you know, their feet hurt. Their golf clubs are rusty. You know, they got 100 excuses. I don't know. That's been my experience. Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite.

Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman, help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an Acapella band with They're between songs banter. There's the worst singer in the group. The worst? Yeah. Me.

Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, you only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right? That's the name. The Harvard yard, but they're open. Do you have a name suggestion? We're open.

Since you guys are middle aged. One erection. Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends. on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Cuba me. I need some jokes to make me seem funny. Jacob Kingston grew up in an isolated polygamous sect. We were God's chosen, kingdom on earth.

He felt destined for greatness. So when a swaggering Armenian businessman catapults Jacob into an extraordinary world, he doesn't look back. Ferraris and Lamborghinis, private jets, meeting the president of Turkey. I'm Michelle McPhee, and this is one of the most shocking criminal conspiracies I've ever come across.

When Jacob met Levan, this went to a billion dollar fraud. But with two kings from entirely different worlds, just how long can their empire survive? The largest tax investigation in American history. You need to tell me what you know. Is somebody coming after me? Jacob told Levan, you're ruining my. my life. Listen to Kingdom of Fraud starting on May 12th on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and host of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. We share stories and scientific insights to help us all better navigate these periods of turbulence and transformation. There is one finding that is consistent,

and that is that our resilience rests on our relationships. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. Listen to a slight change of plans on the I-Heartner. Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your husband is not who you think he is. Your body is not what you saw it was.

Your identity is formed by a secret history. I'm Danny Shapiro, and these are just a few of the stunning stories I'll be exploring on the 14th season of Family Secrets. And just then, we felt the plain turn in the air, so much so that the bags that were under people's seats just kind of flew into the aisle. Each week, we dive headfirst into the complex power of secrecy, how it shapes our identities and relationships, and how it ultimately can reveal to us our truest selves. My daughter, she's pretending she doesn't know, but is trying to cook and feed me and keep me alive because I wasn't eating anything, and me pretending like everything was fine. He kind of shoved me out of the way and said, move, and he went out the front door and he jumped in a car and drove off, and that was the last time I saw him.

Listen to Season 14 of Family Secrets on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and your 20s, they can feel like a lot. On the psychology of your 20s podcast, we unpack the anxiety, the overthinking, the heartbreak, the identity crisis, all of it that comes with being in your 20s. Because if you've ever thought, is anybody else feeling this way, they definitely are. I feel like my 20s was a process of checking off everything that I was not good at to get to what I was good at. Oftentimes we take everything a little bit too seriously and we get lost in things that we later on decide weren't even important to us to begin when. There was a large chunk of my 20s that I was just so wanting to be out of that phase out of my skin. And I just like really regret not living in the present more.

Each week we break down the science behind what you're going through. give you real tools to navigate it. Your 20s aren't about having it all figured out. They're about understanding yourself just a little bit better. Listen to the psychology of your 20s on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last but not least, I ghost it because the vibe fell off. But I can't explain why. I mean, you don't ghost.

I mean, but, but I did ghost someone recently because not recently. It was a few years ago, a few years ago. Okay. But I found out one of my friends sent me a tweet of like something about him doing something like hooking up with some girl on another show. Okay. So you couldn't cancel it? You just ghosts?

Have you ever been ghosted? Actually, I said, I said I read some unsavory things about you online. Okay. So I'm not interested in hanging out today. That's not ghosting then. Ghosting is not showing up, right? Well, then he doesn't reply to any messages after that. I think it depends how long.

I will say, Susan, I have ghosted men, but it's only like we had one talk. And for me, one, you know, phone conversation, whatever. And to me, the vibe feels off. So I say, okay, you know, I've got to run. And then I block them. I'm out. I don't feel like I. I don't feel like I owe a man an explanation.

If not just from one No, but in a relationship If you feel the vibe is off and you're in a relationship Then you are the problem because you have not gone and told the person what the problem is what your problem is Why you feel Absolutely. Absolutely. I think being ghosted is the most uncomfortable feeling because you don't know why I'd rather it's so easy in today's world you send a text

You know, I just don't feel a spark or move along Right. Whatever. It's just too. easy to have someone question themselves like why would he do that to me or why would she do that to me i think that's mean well it is it is mean but like in dating culture it is everyone's very hardened to that like it's people just they think that that's normal and fine and okay so like everyone has already like been damaged and traumatized with going through that so many times everyone's just doing it to each

other. It's just, it's toxic. It's wrong. It is wrong. Ghosting is wrong. Ghosting is very wrong. Wait, can we do another podcast with you, Demi, about all the things that are wrong in today's dating culture? Because we could go on for two hours about. We should go live with Demi one night and just talking. I'm just saying, between what you have said, Demi, about your own dating experiences, what we have experienced, you know, these, these, am I the problem? prompts like the dating world is screwed up right now it is from 30 to all the way up I don't know how old of men you're willing to date but how do you fix it if they're above ground Demi they're they're breathing ambulatory I don't ask for much even you know just just I don't get they have

but how do you fix it we have to stop giving them access stop being so accessible to them. If you're, if you're not accessible to them, they interest immediately. Like they are just, they're easy creatures to figure out. But for me, I'm just really not attracted to any of them that haven't figured it out already. And none of them really have seemed to figure it out. They, because they are reaping the benefits of the dating pool because they, it works

for them. The dating pool's amazing for them right now. Wait, can I just say, Demi, you, you are so right. Well, this has been. So much fun, Debbie. You, I don't care what you think about men or women or dating. I think you really give some good advice. You're very insightful.

You're lovely. You're a really interesting person. And I have personally, have enjoyed getting to know you a little bit better. And if we do a show together, the three of us, I promise you, Susan and I will fight over who's bringing you food. Okay? You will not have to worry. Debbie, let me just tell you. I'll be bringing them.

both of your food. Okay, just don't believe that line. I can bring her food. What it involves cooking it. So you'll cook the food and she'll give it to me. There you go. I'll be the food runner. She's the runner.

This has been awesome. Thank you. We're just playing restaurant. But seriously, Kathy and I'll come live on you. Any time you want, if you want to talk about the dating thing, maybe we can get across to somebody. At least one person. If we touch one person that's doing something.

And you know what, Susan? Go ahead, Debbie. Well, whoa, it's helpful for women to see, to know that, like, you can be okay by yourself. And it's scared. But, like, it is so empowering. And it is actually the happiest you will ever be. Because when you are with a man, it is no longer about you. And that sucks.

Yeah, it should be, though. It should be. And some women, some women have their men trained right. And those women, they need more exposure. We need to get them on all the platforms. We need to see men acting right. And can I tell you how? You ask Susan, how do we get men?

You know how we do it? All you moms out there that are listening that are raising little boys, raise your boys to be respectful, kind, human beings and never say, oh, boys will be boys as they throw a snowball at a girl's head and, you know, maver for life. Exactly. You should be raising your boys to worship women. because women are everything to them. Not only did they birth them, but they are taking care of them. And like without them,

it would be, this world would be shit. Like there would be no world. There wouldn't be a world. They, they can't reproduce. Exactly, exactly.

But, but women have, we are so much kinder. Like we have, we're more, we're smarter. We are everything better. And they need to understand our value and respect us as such.

But it doesn't start, but, yeah, it doesn't start when they're 20 or 30. 30. That's what I'm saying. Moms pay attention. It starts with how you raise your sons. Yes. And I was just a lot of good, good, decent men out there. Where are they? They just happen to be taken. Exactly. I am friends with some, I'm friends with men. I know if you believe it or not. But I have some very good friends that are men. And they are my friends

husbands and stuff like that. Yeah, exactly. Wait, can I just tell you what someone just told me the other day when I was kvecheing about not having anyone to date they said kathy you are fabulous here's the problem really good men are either married or chasing younger women or dead well send them my way all right if you see a really good man chasing a younger woman and you think do you want an older guy if you want a 69 year old man if i could stomach him All three of us are very good on our own. We're very happy. I mean, I could not imagine sharing my space.

You know, that sounds like a nightmare to me. I mean, no, no, no. A wife, I'm very interested in a wife. That I would love. I would love nothing more than a wife. Because it's two women. You like the same kind of things. You keep house.

It's just, it goes. Exactly. Exactly. Boy, I want to note to me, are you looking? Are you looking for that? Right now or not? You said no. No, I'm on, I'm on Raya, but like my membership is just active. I don't like go scrolling on there.

But like every now and then, like I'll get a notification that someone liked me or something or me and my friends will go scrolling through and see. They didn't accept me. Me neither. I could send them recommendations. I think we're too old. The pool isn't big enough for us. I'm sure there's old men on there.

Oh, great. Don't you love it, Susan? We can get an old man. I'm talking about when they act like women are all equal here. No, we're not. You're letting in old men that are probably, who knows the age, you can go up really high on the age. I'm going to go in there and find me a super old man and I'm going to do something about it. I'm going to raise hell.

I'm going to say, why are you letting in this guy who's on the brink of death, but not Susan and Kathy? Hey, I say vote for Demi. That's what I say. Demi, you need to rule the world. Vote for Demi. I love it. Debbie for president. You know, there was a sign that said that.

Wait, and my bachelor, it was Women's Tell All. Someone had a sign that said, Debbie for president. I love it. How about Spencer? What the hell? What really? Political now?

Come more. Who's Spencer? Somebody from the show. Spencer from the Hill. Anyway, that's going to wrap it up for us. That's a whole new conversation. It's a whole other conversation. We're not setting Demi up today.

Yeah, eyes are rolled into the back of my head. We love you. I love you guys. You are fabulous. Okay, well, thank you again, Demi, for joining us on Bachelor Golden Hour. Thank you for having me. Make sure to rate us, review us, and subscribe wherever you listen to your podcast. And you can follow us on social media at Bachelor Happy Hour and at Bachelor Nation.

and look for us live on Demi's airtime. And look for us on the next reality TV show with Demi. We're going to be the three musketeers. But until that happens, we hope you have a great week. Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smigel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Side U.

help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform? We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter. Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and friends on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans.

I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This season on Dear Chelsea with me, Chelsea Handler, we have some fantastic guests like Amelia clerk. When like young people come up to me and they want to be an actor or whatever. And my first thing is always, can you think of anything else that you can do? Rather be disappointed in.

Do that. David O'Yelloo. I love this podcast, whether it's therapy or relationships or religion or sex or addiction or you just go straight for the guts. Dennis Leary, Gaten Moderato from Stranger Things. Tena Monsu. Camilla Morone. Carrie Kenny Silver and more. Listen to these episodes of Dear Chelsea on the Iheart Radio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Why are we all so obsessed with romance? On the Radio 831 podcast, join us, Sanjana Basker, and Tyler McCall, as we unpack all the trending tropes, fuzzy adaptations, book talk drama, and celebrity love stories with hot takes and sharp guests. Each episode digs into what these stories reveal about desire, fantasy, identity, and how we love now. Listen to the Radio 831 podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The story I've told myself can then shape my behavior, and that can lead me to sabotage the possibility of connection.

This Mental Health Awareness Month, tune into the podcast deeply well with Debbie Brown if you've been searching for a soft place to land while doing the work to become whole. This podcast is for you to hear more. Listen to deeply well with Debbie Brown from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.