Bachelor Happy Hour - Exclusive: One on One with Gerry the Golden Bachelor

Episode Date: July 19, 2023

Bachelor Nation, meet your Golden Bachelor! On this special edition of “Bachelor Happy Hour,” Joe and Serena chat with Gerry all about his upcoming journey and get the exclusive on everything he��s excited for and nervous about as the first ever Golden Bachelor.  They discuss the qualities he’s looking for in a partner, how he’s been getting ready, and what his family and friends really think about all of this. Plus, Gerry gets a quick education on Bachelor Nation and jokes that he isn’t sure what he’s gotten himself into. Listen now!   Be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the psychology podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials easier.

Complex problem solving takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the. iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the latest episode of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, I sat down with Jasmine Crockett, Democratic Representative of Texas. She's holding out the fork for her party in one of the most conservative states in the Union. I think that ultimately, who will become the Democratic nominee for president will be someone

that has been out there and has shown that they won't allow themselves to be punched and just say thank you. Like, they will punch back. Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Why are TSA rules so confusing?

You got a hood of you. I'm take it off. I'm Manny. I'm Noah. This is Devin. And we're best friends and journalists with a new podcast called No Such Thing, where we get to the bottom of questions like that. Why are you screaming? I can't expect what to do. Now, if the rule was the same, go off on me.

I deserve it. You know, lock him up. Listen to No Such Thing on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. No such thing. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hour. We have an extremely special episode for you right now. We have the man himself, the Golden Bachelor.

Gary is here. Gary, how the hell are you? I'm doing better now than I was. this morning. There was a little bit of panic early on, but much better now. Thanks for asking. What do you do when you start panicking? Do you have any breathing techniques? Well, after I run out as peanut butter M&Ms, I'll just pretty much go to anything. I'll nervous eat. You're a snacker. You're a nervous snacker. Yeah, I am. Yeah, I am. I'll tell you what, I've done a decent amount of interviews on this podcast and the prior one before. And I'm, I'm nervous for

that's why not. I don't know. You know, this is, this is a big, this is a big thing. It's new territory. You know, we've had Bachelor, Bachelorette, Bachelor in Paradise, but you're the first ever golden bachelor ever to exist and for us to interview. So this is super exciting for us as well. Well, well, thanks for that. That's pretty sweet of you. So I'm excited for it as well. This is one of the rare times I've ever been on a podcast. No wait, I've never been on a podcast. This is your first one? Oh, yeah. This is it.

This is the first one. Well, welcome. We're just going to have a great chat today. We want to get to know you better. We want our listeners to get to know you better. And we just want to show everyone why they should be so excited to watch your season, which is coming up. Yes. And before we jump into it, I'm Joe and this is Serena.

And we met on Bachelor in Paradise. So how familiar are you with the Bachelor franchise and all the shows? shows. Well, I do remember the two of you from your episode. I probably wasn't as religious a watcher back then. But I've become more and more, more and more of a routine to watch. I'm pretty hooked now. Well, yeah, now you got to be. Are you from Indiana? I'm not from Indiana. I spent most of my life in Iowa. along the Mississippi River, and when my wife and I were talking about retiring, we wanted a house on a lake to be the interesting destination for our kids to come back to. So that's what brought us to Indiana, plus my dad lives in Fort Wayne so I can still look over him a little bit.

Okay. I'm from Chicago. You go often? Ever been? Oh, yeah. My career took me there a number of times. My oldest daughter lives in Yorkville, which is west of Chicago. So, yeah. And what was your career? What did you do? Early on, I was a restaurant owner and operator, and it was nothing glamorous. It was fast food.

And then I sold my business and spent the rest of my career in food distribution. And that's what took me to Chicago a number of times. I worked with salesmen and did sales training and so forth. Nice, nice. And how old were you when you and your wife got together? When we first met, I think we were a sophomore in high school. Wow. We didn't start hanging out or dating until I was a senior in high school.

But yeah, it goes back to 1969, 1967. a long time ago. So you don't have much experience in dating, do you? I have very little experience in dating. And, you know, it's not something you can do on the run. You need a little bit of a primer with it. And it's been, you know, a tough process for me. I got to admit.

Yeah. Yeah. So is that what led you to decide to be the Golden Bachelor? You're like, this is a little too tough. So let's just do all 30 women at once. and then we'll just fast track the process to finding a wife. And we'll do it on TV, too. Yeah, yeah.

That makes perfect sense, doesn't it? Yeah. I think it was about three years ago, and I wasn't dating anyone. And at that time, I hadn't developed the good circle of friends that I have now. And I have a really good group of friends now. But we were kind of watching The Bachelor, Bachelorette, and by we, I mean my daughters. And we text back and forth. and, you know, we'd Mac on somebody and so forth.

And the ad for the senior bachelor came on, and I looked at it, and my girl said, well, give it a try. And like I said, it was like, I had nothing going socially, kind of probably feeling sorry for myself a little bit. And I answered it, and, you know, I got a call back. I had a few Zoom calls and so forth. And, of course, then it died because of COVID. so okay so yeah i guess this has been going on did you so once covid hit and it kind of just like died down did you think that was it i did um in fact i i recall you know kind of waiting and waiting and and i had a phone number for one of the producers at that time and i finally uh sent him one last

message and i and i included a picture and i said who wants to be the first senior bachelor this guy and um they i think the message back was something like um okay we've all been released from responsibility it doesn't look like the project is going to happen now and and and that was it so then fast forward two plus years to february of this year when i get a call and i mean that one was out of the blue yeah but anyway i get the call are you still interested and at first I said no as I'm over it I'm good to go I'm fine and the conversation kind of quite honestly I didn't want to hang up I wanted to see you know how the conversation would develop and evolve and and lo and behold I probably was pretty easy to be talked into it and you know so that was the slippery slopes first step so you got

produced it's a once in a lifetime incredibly unique opportunity so if you're an experiential person it's understandable that you're like okay you know i'm kind of over this but at the same time like tell me more oh that's exactly what it was um and and then you know i recall hanging the phone up i mean i remember exactly in the house where i was and and so forth and i hang the phone up and i go, what did I just do? And then with literally with every passing moment, I got more and more excited about the possibility. And then, of course, as things happened, you know, phone calls and interviews and Zoom calls and everything, I mean, it's just really, it's ramped up day by day by day. Oh, yeah, because you're investing more and more time into it and it starts to become

more and more real and you're like, wow, maybe I will be the Golden Bachelor and here you are. Yes, yes. I think the time between that phone call and subsequent meetings and so forth to the time that I actually got the news officially from Jesse Palmer and it was Memorial Day morning, that was the most difficult period of this whole thing because you don't know, is it a yes, is it a no? Should I just give up hope? Should I keep hanging on? The emotions are just all over the place. that couple of months. So how are you, well, I have so many questions for you. Like, first all, you look, you look fantastic. What are you doing? Are you, are you going to the gym? Are you doing like cold depths? Like, what's your routine? Yeah, no, I drink a lot of beer. I eat peanuts. I stay up late. I don't, no, I'm just kidding. I was like, all right. I was like, wow, that's a secret. Okay. I think the real secret is genetics.

But I was a marathon runner, you know, high school, college athlete. I try to eat well, but I fail a lot at that, you know. But I think it's just in general trying to stay healthy. I probably spend 10 hours a week playing pickleball. So that burns off a lot of energy. You're definitely going to get some social media. deals for pickleball for sure that's that's that is definitely coming your way okay so how how are you prepping to date 30 women wow that you know that's a really good question and I have given it

a lot of thought I mean it's almost you can't get away from it but I think the the thing that I spend a lot of time doing is trying to figure out what are the good questions to ask that will reveal character and reveal whether or not someone is genuinely a high-energy competitive person or, you know, really important is how close are they to family? You know, I've dated a few women along the way, and it's very revealing when someone doesn't have good, friendly ties with their children. it's like it really it manifests in a number of negative ways so I'm dr. Scott Barry Kaufman host of the psychology podcast here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about exploring

human potential I was going to schools to try to teach kids these skills and I get eye rolling from teachers or I get students who would be like it's easier to punch someone in the face when you think about emotion regulation, like you're not going to choose an adapted strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome as a result of it if it's going to be beneficial to you. Because it's easy to say like go you, go blank yourself, right? It's easy. It's easy to just drink the extra beer. It's easy to ignore to suppress seeing a colleague who's bothering you and just like walk the other way. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials is easier. Drinking is easier. Yelling, screaming is easy.

complex problem solving, meditating, you know, takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the IHartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I think Democrats have, for a very long time, allow Republicans to play them. So essentially, Republicans came up with a narrative, and Democrats decided to play into that. And that only hurt the Democrats. I'm Kitty Couric. Jasmine Crockett, Democratic Representative of Texas, is not known for holding back. And our recent chat on Next Question is no exception. But when you hear how she got to where she is, her intensity makes perfect sense.

It's just hard to imagine a world where you don't have enough people that care to do right by people. And so that same passion that carried me through as a public defender, that led me to want to change laws and thinking about the harm that will happen not just to my constituents, but just generally, like, I carry that weight with me because you've seen it up close. Yeah.

Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect.

And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. So that's kind of in terms of people's character, It's important to you. Do you have like a type in terms of physical appearance or something specific that you're looking for other than like strong family values? I guess I kind of do. I would want someone that in their own way is fit. If they're tall or short, you know, that those kind of things don't matter.

It's are they using the most or getting the most out of their physical attributes? Are they pushing themselves? Are they refusing to give up? If your wife's looking down on you now, what do you think she would say? I think she would be very pleased. I have a picture of her in my walk-in closet. So every night I'm in there and I see her picture. It's the only one now that I have in the house.

and in the mornings I see her picture and you know we talk you know I'll make a brief comment or you know sometimes that talk is silent but here lately in the last couple of months you know my question for her is always so what do you think of this am I doing the right thing and I I really have strong positive feelings about it I think she would be very happy um I think she's probably seen me fail at a number of attempted relationships in dating. And I really think she would be approve of this. It's positive. It's energetic. It's a way of communicating and finding the connection with a number of people, but specifically one special person. I'm pretty confident. Nice. She would want you to find your pickleball partner.

Yeah, yeah, that would be great. I love that. And I think that's such a healthy, a healthy outlook. And, I mean, I think you're going to, I think you're going to find your person. How about friends? Now, I know you've got to have some 70-year-old guy friends who are like, I think you're the luckiest man in the world right now. Yeah, there's a few.

Any bad advice. I want to hear some bad advice from those friends. What are they saying? Oh, you know, some of that bad advice I can't put on the air, it's so bad. That's fair. Yeah, that's fair. It is a family show to an extent. Let's go, let's go daughters then. How about your daughters and grandkids? What are they saying? Oh, they are over the top supportive of this. The experience of having them in Los Angeles with me a couple of weeks ago when I was doing the promotions and so forth. I mean, we'd laugh and we'd cry, and it was just an amazing, amazing experience.

And today, you know, I have two daughters, one is our granddaughters. One is 21, 116, and they're very adept at finding comments and the things online. And so they're firing these stuff nonstop about the things that are being said. And it's hilarious, but they are loving it. And, you know, my two daughters then, of course, they're. a little bit older, you know, I've one that's 40 and 46, and, you know, they're sort of in between. So they're getting some of the online stuff, but an awful lot of feedback from their personal friends. So that is genuinely part of the fun of this experience, is seeing all the

people that are my close circle having so much fun with it. I'm pleasantly surprised that there's been almost no jealousy about it. No one's saying I wish it was me and mentally wishing, you know, that I wasn't in that spot. Everybody is so positive and supportive. That's great. That's great. That's something that people don't talk about that much going on the show and it has been something that I experienced, I know you experienced, is it really just brings people together, like your circle of friends and family really surround around you and they get excited about it and they want to be involved. and it is really fun for not just you and your journey, but all the people in your life to get to enjoy and celebrate as well.

There's a little story that I think really epitomizes, you know, what we're talking about here. But I have a neighbor whose husband passed away last November. And we were outside last Saturday. They were having a memorial for him. she's 80 years old and was feeling kind of bad and literally it was six years ago on that Saturday that I took my wife to the hospital when she never came home and we had a good cry you know hugged it out a little bit had a good cry about three hours later she calls and she goes

my daughter is here my daughter-in-law is here can can we come over and have our picture taken with you and so we're doing selfies it I wish I could show you the sequence of three because there's three women in me in the first picture, kind of normal. And then in between that picture and the next, I turn to her and I say, just give me a little kiss right here. And as she does, I turn. And so we kissed. And then the last picture, her face is lit up and busting out with laughter.

And it was really a great experience to watch her have a bad morning and then a great morning because of, basically because of the Golden Bachelor experience. So it was fun. That's amazing. It's bringing people together in your life. It's going to bring people together on the show to hopefully find a second chance of love. So there's lots to be excited about. Also, you better, you better stop kissing women right now.

Yeah, no more kissing your neighbors. You got a lot of women getting. I'm going to reread my contract because I don't think that's in there. You're right. Can you tell us, like, what is an ideal date for you right now? Oh, I think an ideal date is focused heavily on conversation, because I'm kind of thinking we're talking an early date, a first date, something like that, where, you know, we can talk about priorities, we can talk about whether or not the person is interested in being married.

You know, there's many women of my age that look at marriage and say, you know, it's kind of a complication. Do we need to be married to be committed to each other? And it's an interesting thought. I would want that day to include some activities so that I would know that we could engage together. It'd be nice if there was an activity where I would know how well we would work. work as a unit. A pickleball date or a golf date would be great. I think those kind of things are pretty revealing of people's character.

I got to come out to Indiana and play you in a little pickleball. I'm pretty good myself. I don't want to mislead you. I'm not sure we're good. We're just all about the same level. So we have a heck of a good time being competitive with each other. Joe is hyping himself up, Larry. You can definitely beat that at pickleball.

So going into this process, what are you the most excited about? What are you the most nervous for? I'm really most excited for that first night when I get to see all of the women and get a first impression. That is really a moment that I think sort of sets the tone mentally for me. And then what I'm most nervous about, you know, people have asked me so many times, are you nervous that, and I've said, no, I'm really not, that I'm beginning to think I'm super naive and I need to be more nervous. But I'm more nervous about stepping on a rake and breaking my nose here at home than I am

anything about the show. It doesn't make me nervous. It makes me excited. I feel energized. I can't wait. of course, but I'm not feeling too nervous about it. I feel like that's a good thing because as much as you know, maybe you just don't know what you don't know, like I'm sure there's things that are going to come up that make you nervous that you just couldn't expect.

It definitely just means you're going to go into it with like an open mind, an open heart, enthusiasm. I feel like that's the best way to go into it, whereas you're not overthinking it too much. You know, I feel like people get really nervous when they really overthinking it. At the end of the day, you're just trying to find love. And that should be fun. Yes. I kind of want life to slow down. I want to enjoy every moment.

I want to be able to make a mental note or write in a logbook at night some of the high points of the day and remember those moments. And if I can do that, it'll be pretty fun. That's great. You're not going to get nervous. You're a confident man and you've got enough experience. So I'm not worried about you. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the psychology podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about exploring human potential.

I was going to schools to try to teach kids these skills and I get eye rolling from teachers or I get students who would be like, it's easier to punch someone in the face. When you think about emotion regulation, like you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. result of it if it's going to be beneficial to you because it's easy to say like like go you go blank yourself right it's easy it's easy to just drink the extra beer it's easy to ignore to suppress seeing a colleague who's bothering you and just like walk the other way avoidance is easier ignoring is easier denial is easier drinking is easier yelling screaming is easy

complex problem solving meditating you know takes effort listen to the psychology podcast on the iHeart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. I think Democrats have for a very long time allow Republicans to play them. So essentially, Republicans came up with a narrative and Democrats decided to play into that and that only hurt the Democrats.

I'm Kitty Couric. Jasmine Crockett, Democratic Representative of Texas, is not known for holding back. And our recent chat on next question is no exception. But when you hear how she got to where she's, is. Her intensity makes perfect sense. It's just hard to imagine a world where you don't have enough people that care to do right by people. And so that same passion that carried me through as a public defender that led me to want to change laws and thinking about the harm that will happen,

not just to my constituents, but just generally, like, I carry that weight with me because Because you've seen it up close. Yeah. Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine that you're on an airplane and all of a sudden you hear this. Attention passengers. The pilot is having an emergency and we need someone, anyone, to land this plane.

Think you could do it? It turns out that nearly 50% of men think that they could land the plane with the help of air traffic control and they're saying like okay pull this and so this pull that turn this it's just i can do my eyes close i'm manny i'm noah this is devon and on our new show no such thing we get to the bottom of questions like these join us as we talk to the leading expert on overconfidence those who lack expertise lack the expertise they need to recognize that they lack expertise and then as we try the whole thing out for real wait what oh that's the runway i'm looking at at this thing.

Listen to no such thing on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We're going to jump in. Gary, we're going to play a game. Before we do, do you have any questions for us

because we did fall in love on the show? We did. We're married now. We've been together just over two years. We got engaged just over two years ago and then we got married in the fall and we have our wedding coming up in September.

How long after the show did you realize you were the right people for each other? That's a good question. So my answer to that would be, I mean, obviously we left the show believing we were the right people

for each other, we got engaged on it, but you know, you hit the real world and there's still new tests and experiences to go through. And I went and stayed with Joe for 10 days and we were, we had to hide because no one can know

we were together. So I was basically stuck in his apartment with him for 10 days straight. And when- You got caught the first day. Yeah, that's a whole other story. And when I left after the 10 days to go back home, I was so sad to be leaving. We'd had the best time. I, like, couldn't get enough of him. And that's what I knew. I was like, yeah, I've made the right decision. You know, this works just as well in the Bachelor world as it does in the real world. that's awesome I'm so glad to hear that Joe what how would you answer the question I wouldn't answer no I well you know I feel like I knew on the show but then you know you obviously you have to test it once you step into the real world and it was in that 10 day period where I was like okay this is going to work or I believe this has a really good chance and all my feelings that I felt on the show

were as real as they are now like and it's you know you just have to be like just you're an honest guy just be yourself and I believe you will find your match in the person that's also being honest and that's really all you need you just need two people that are being themselves and that will click yeah because when we left the show there was no surprises on like finding out he wasn't who he said he was or wasn't acting how he usually acts because we're on a TV show and that was that is what made it so easy to fall in love with each other on the show and then just have our love grow and get even better off the show. The comments you've just made, I will hold close and certainly remember as I go forward.

Good, good. And also another comment I'm going to make, and this is important, download Instagram because you will get some pickleball deals. Okay. Before we let you go, we're going to play a quick game, rapid fire. First thing that comes to your head. Okay. You ready? There's nothing tough here. It's all just fun. Fun questions.

Yeah. Okay. What is the first thing you do when you wake up? Brush my teeth. How do you like your pizza? Thick crust Detroit style. Interesting. Best dating advice you ever received.

This dating advice that you've received. Go slow. What is your go-to cocktail? Vodka and Cranberry Who is one person living or not That you would like to have dinner with Sandra Bullock Oh, why Sandra Bullock?

Well, I think she's hilarious She emotes that she has good character And good values And she's reasonably age appropriate Well, maybe she'll make a guest appearance On your show Is she your celebrity crush? Um, no, she's probably not.

She's like the more sincere person that, that I would like to speak with or be with on a date or something like that. Who's your celebrity crush? Penelope Cruz. Nice. That's a nice one. She's a good celebrity crush. There you go. All right.

What is one word or phrase that your friends use to describe you? Good listener. Do you have any bad habits? Oh, yeah, I'm sure I do. Let me think, bad habits. Yeah, I think about eating sweets way too much at bedtime, and I do it. Do you? Oh, yeah.

I'd love to eliminate that. But I start thinking about dessert the minute I have my first bite of dinner. Joe's a very big frozen yogurt fan, so he can relate to that because the minute we start dinner, he's like, I wonder if I'll order Pinkberry tonight. Yeah. See, if the property next door was available, I would promote putting a dairy queen right there, and I'd be there every day. Oh, my gosh, that would be dangerous.

Love that. What is your go-to karaoke song? Ooh, I've never done karaoke. I need to get a karaoke song. I don't have one. Well, the show just got a great date idea. There you go. Get ready.

You definitely have a karaoke date now. ready. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go? Anywhere in the world, I think it would be Iceland. Rijavik, Iceland.

Why Iceland? I probably don't have a good reason. I just think that would be a great place to go. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. What's your favorite place in the world you've been? That I've been. I think I enjoyed Hawaii more than anywhere else. I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, and we almost were going to go there on our huddy move, but we're not, but it's still on my like bucket list.

I have to go. Yeah. Well, that's great. Gary, we are honestly, I cannot wait to watch you. I cannot wait to watch this show. We're so happy for you. Thanks, you guys. This was a real pleasure to meet the two of you.

No, it was our pleasure. This was amazing. I can't wait. You're such a star. You're definitely going to find love. I know it. I feel it. I'm so excited for you.

I hope that's the case because that's the whole point of all of this is to find the right person for me. Yes. You know, I had such a wonderful wedding or marriage that I want to find the next right person for me. You know, being in the fourth quarter of life, you don't want to give up. Yeah. So hopefully it happens. I'm very optimistic. I'm optimistic for you.

It's going to be great. Just don't treat these women like their flavors at Dairy Queen, Gary. But enjoy yourself. You're going to have so many beautiful women. Enjoy yourself. Bachelor Nation, thank you guys so much for tuning in. And make sure to tune in this fall to watch Gary's journey. Yes.

And as always, you can catch new episodes of Bachelor Happy Hour dropping this week. Gary, thank you so much. and everyone, thanks for listening. Bye, everyone. Goodbye, everybody, and thank you so much. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use

unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials easier. Complex problem solving takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the latest episode of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, I sat down with Jasmine Crockett, Democratic Representative of Texas. She's holding out the fork for her party in one of the most conservative states in the union. I think that ultimately, who will become the Democratic nominee for president will be someone that has been out there and has shown that they won't allow themselves to be punched and just say thank you. Like, they will punch back. Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, my name is Enya Yumanzoor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect. And want to hear people with mental illness, psychobabble. Yes, yes.

Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeart Radio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. This is an IHeart podcast.