Bachelor Happy Hour - Fan Favorite Riley Is Here

Episode Date: December 15, 2020

Riley opens up about his emotional exit from “The Bachelorette” and why he really needed to talk to Tayshia at “Men Tell All” in order to get closure and move on. Riley also reveals how the show helped him open up and evolve.   Plus, Rachel and Becca share their thoughts on last night’s emotional episode and “Men Tell All.” “Bachelor Happy Hour” will be back with another all-new podcast tomorrow! Don’t forget to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeartRadio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. Welcome back. That's our Happy Hour listeners. We had, Becca, an interesting episode last night, dare I say it. I'll give it interesting because I personally feel cheated. I don't know about you.

I feel cheated because half the episode was a regular episode. and half the episode was Men Tell All. If I want to watch two hours of anything, it's Men Tell All. And we didn't get that. We did not. It's like on par with everything else this season and this year, it was cut short. It was choppy. I mean, I do like the fact, though.

One thing I did like about Mental All is that there was less men, but it was like the really, like, standout men that we've seen from this season. And it felt very, very much like a real housewives reunion. And of course, we love a real housewife. So I appreciated that fact. But yeah, I wanted to get into it a lot more. And they're just, when I say choppy, I felt like we would get into a conversation or the drama. And then it would pivot to something else. And then pivot.

And it was like kind of all over the place. You know, I think we should just get into it. We are, of course, going to have one of our favorites from this season, who we did see have an amazing. presence and mental all and that is riley um so we're going to have him on later today and we'll get the tea from him and we'll pick his brain on all things from the season from the switcheroo for mental all um but let's just get into it from the beginning because like you said it was only half of a regular episode when chris harrison walked in i'm really bothered we only had half for mental the whole season's been dragging on and then you cheat us of mentel all i'm telling you i know you guys

are upset just like us i mean so okay blake we said on the last episode that blake Blake, we were like, how in the world is he still here? And then it gets a one-on-one. There wasn't one person sitting in that room of men that thought Blake was coming back. It was on their faces. If you forgot, go rewind and watch the first five minutes. Everyone was looking like, this man. They helped him pack his bags probably before that.

They knew he was set up to go home. By this point, like, there has been barely any interaction that we've seen between him and Tasha. And so it was bound to happen. Yeah, he knew it, Tasha knew it, the shaman knew it. She probably said it. But the interesting part about Blake leaving wasn't the fact that he left. It's that it kind of then triggered this reaction in Tasia where we then see her go into the house again with all the men and pull Riley aside. And it was like this domino effect of having to send guys home not at the Rose ceremony.

So I actually want to touch on this briefly because like I said, Riley's been one of my. favorites. He was one of the guys that I met on the date that I hosted who really stuck out to me. He was a complete gentleman. How did you feel about the way she sent Riley home instead of bringing him to a proper row ceremony? I'm torn on this because when you get to this point in the season where you're having to eliminate multiple men because you're separating them from the ones you're going to meet their families, it's really hard. Because no matter who's, left, no matter what the romantic connection is, you definitely feel something for them, even if it's on a friendship level. And it is devastating that you're going to break their hearts because

they don't know what you know. And I remember how emotional this week was for me on my season, Matt Monson, people could not, he was like a Blake, not like Blake as a person, but just Blake is, you didn't see a lot of them and you didn't understand why he was still there. But I felt so connected to Matt. And I broke down like I did at the end when I sent Matt home. So I understood Tasha's emotion because it is hard. And I know that she was probably forced. Like she probably wanted to be like, oh, can I wait here? And it's like, no, you've got to, you can't keep dragging it along, Tasha. Like, you've got to let these men go. I know that's how it is. So I felt bad for Tasia that she was put in that position. But I don't like what she said to Riley when she was sending him

home. And I do want to talk to him about that. Yeah. Yeah. One thing that kind of stuck out to me, well, two things. I, as much as it sucks being, I'm sure being Riley and having to be pulled out in front of all of the men, I can appreciate the fact that she wanted to have a longer conversation with him and try to give him a bit more insight than just, I'm not going to give you a rose. I feel like because he was so vulnerable with her in their last conversation, she really wanted to allow him that extra time. Now, did it help? I don't know.

I think it quite honestly made him a little bit more confused. But what I appreciated, I keep saying the word appreciate, but what I liked about that conversation is that he kind of challenged her and still questioned her. Usually when any lead sends a guy home, they kind of just take it for what it is and they understand, okay, you know, like, it's not me, goodbye. And it's obviously sad for a lot of them. But I think for him, he was so confused and was like, well, why am I still here? Are you like, is this really what you want to do and the why behind it?

Where we haven't seen most men do that with her, which I found intriguing as a viewer. Yeah. I mean, you could tell Riley was in complete shock when he was going home. And I just felt for him. And I felt like he was asking for more, but he wasn't getting more from her. And I think that's what, if you're going to take the time to pull him to the side and give him more of an explanation, then you don't put it on him as to why he's going home. Just talk about why you are sending him home and, you know, how this process is and where

he compares to the other men. I don't know. I just felt really bad for him. And obviously, I felt bad for my guy. But we did see more of him, which I'm sure you were happy about for a short little bit. Can we talk about Zach C's rude response to Bennett when he tried to merely reach out. a hand and touch him and just say, you know, good to be

back in a nice southern friendly gesture. And Zach was repulsed. He was like, oh, he like looked down at his hand as if like, I don't know, he spit on him. I, I, I, Zach, that, I didn't like it.

I don't know. I love the fact, though, when Bennett came back in, he not only was like, oh, it looks like you guys have seen a ghost. Well, obviously, but like he, I felt like he took it upon himself to be the and was like, let's have a seat, gentlemen, and let's sit down and talk about this.

You know Bennett love that moment more than anyone. He loved the attention of it. Look, this is the thing. I can love Bennett, but I can also recognize Bennett for who he is. Everything I say is all in fun. Obviously, I say he's charming and he's condescending. That moment for Bennett was everything to come back and have the men rattled and be in control of the situation.

He eats it out. Okay, Bennett totally just has like a cauldron in the back, like stirring it, waiting for the moment, for the producers, be like, okay, now you can, you're cute, now you can walk in Benet. You know, he said, move over. I'm stirring the pot tonight. That's exactly what he said. Have you, okay, have you said this about Bennett? Have you called him like the gift that keeps on giving? Mm-mm, mm-mm. I don't know why that just popped into my head, but he truly is, especially in this episode. He is. I thought it was, I thought it was poetic and smart. on the producer side that because of the way she sit home, Blake and Riley, it came down to Noah and Bennett, not getting the rose. So it was like, yeah, walked out. I liked that. I liked that.

I liked that it came down to those two. And it was like, nope, you guys, this is how it's going to end for you. You're going to walk out together. You and your job. Side by side. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, that's basically the episode that we saw, the proper episode in a nutshell, obviously, we now get into the Mental All, which we're going to have Riley on, which he was there. He can give us way more insight to what we saw. I mean, basically, two main things in Mental All. The drama between Noah and Bennett, the feud is still ongoing, but I don't think that there was like anything new or shocking that was said between the two.

I mean, they basically said, we're not going to be friends, you know? Yeah. It is what it is, which I don't think comes as a shock to anyone. Joseph. Why? I mean, I get why Yosef was there, but also why was Yosef there? He just, oh man, he just

dug his grave deeper and deeper and deeper. It was just an incomplete reunion. If we're going to dig back into Claire's season and pull out the drama, how are you not going to have the men talk about Dale? And everything that went down with them, there was a way I feel like to do it without criticizing Claire and Del's relationship,

but just talking about how they felt and what it was like, and especially having Jason there, who obviously chose not to be a part of Tasha's season because of how he was affected by Claire's decision. I mean, I would have really wanted to know from the man what it felt like those days in between, the unknown of having Tasha. I mean, you're welcome, guys.

The only insight you've gotten on that is by the guests we've had come on this podcast. That's the only way you've heard. at this point. So to me, it's like, we wait all season, just like Real Housewives. We wait all season for that damn reunion. And Andy Cohen has been gracious to give it to us over three weeks. We get three weeks of it, three hours. And we got one hour, maybe, of this reunion. And these were men who were, there was a lot of drama. So I just felt like they missed so much, so much. Yeah. You could have. Definitely. And to your point it's I understand obviously we needed tation there yes but it was strange that that we didn't

have claire there I mean I understand that her and dale had like their sit down moment with chris weeks ago um but yeah if you're going to have yoseph if you're going to have jason if you're going to have still some of these guys who started this journey thinking it was going to be clear the entire time and just still include her in the bloopers it just felt it just felt off um yeah i definitely i definitely wanted it to be more. I wanted it to be longer. But overall, I mean, Tasha looked stunning. I have to comment on that. And it seems

like all of the guys still hold her in such a high regard. Obviously, the relationships didn't work out between her and these men that we saw on stage, but they still have so much respect and admiration for her, which I think, I would hope they would for any lead. Yeah. But it just goes to show, like, the level

of woman that she is and how she treated these men. Why was Chasing not there? I mean, like, if you're going to bring Ed to talk about his drama with Chasin, where's Chasin? God knows he wanted that 15 minutes. No, Rachel, the more important question was, where was baby Carlos?

Where was, thank you. Becca, thank you. Where was baby Carlos? Where was Spencer? I mean, that was our first impression rolls. We've never seen a first impression rose fall off like this. I need to understand. I'm not shocked that he wasn't

there. Well, at least, like, you got the first impression rolls. Like, what happened, Spencer? We didn't see any of you. I mean, something like it just I it could have been I mean I appreciate there wasn't so much like yelling yelling yelling like we normally do but we were robbed we were robbed hopefully they will take note for next season on the women tell all and we want more of the juiciness between all of the cast but as action packed as the episode was why I should say I shouldn't even say action packed but going from all of that the weird half episode. episode to the mental all. There's only one person who really truly shined on that stage. And that was indeed Riley. So he, I'm going to keep saying this. He's one of my favorites. But I'm sure Rachel, he's been one of your favorites sort of the season, a little bit more reserved, a little bit more patient, quiet, but still somebody who holds weight and power when he speaks. And so we have

been patiently waiting for the opportunity to have him on. So without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, we have Riley. Well, welcome. Have you, is this your first podcast you've ever done? Um, like my first one ever or like for the show. Well, obviously for the show, but ever. No, it's not my first one ever. No, um, I was like to a journalism major, so they had me doing these in like college and stuff sometimes. Oh, nice. Wait, how old are you? I am, how old are you? I'm 31. They had you doing podcast and stuff in college. Wow. Yeah. Um, I did mad years at college. I feel like I did, I did five and a half years, I think it took me to graduate. You had a good time.

You had a good time. Where'd you go? I did. I was transferring a lot, you know. I was bouncing around, so. Trying to figure it up. Where did you graduate? I graduated from Finley in Ohio, the University of Philly.

Small school. Okay. Okay. Yeah. And where are you now? Are you in New York? Yeah, I'm in New York City. Okay.

Okay. What type of law do you practice? I practice medical malpractice. Medical malpractice defense. Yeah. Med maldefense. Oh, no, listen. You're right. Listen, back in the day, I used to practice. And, you know, we set tort reform law, my firm in Texas. Yeah, it turned, it wasn't a good look. Okay, because in Texas, you're not going to get anything. We're on the defense side as well, as well. So that's pretty cool. Your law firm lets you come on the show. Yeah, you know what? Like, I mean, they're actually, they're actually big fans of the show. I called, uh,

I remember when I first got cast and I called the main partner in the firm. I gave him a call and I'm like, hey, I got this request. You know, I just got casted for the show. I don't know if you heard of it. You know, it's the Bachelorette. And he's like, well, and I was like, oh, well, I think I want to take the opportunity and go. I wanted to ask you, could I go? And he's like, well, first, Riley, I got to tell you, this is the most bizarre request I've ever heard.

And I was like, all right, you know, I can imagine it is. just like, okay, you know, let me talk to the other partners and see. And then before I got off the phone with him, he goes, but hey, before you go, can you send me a headshot? I want to show it to my daughter. She loves this show. And I'm like, all right, so it's probably a good chance that, you know, they'll let me go. And they end up letting me go and they've been cool with it. And every day, you know, or every time an episode, you know, airs, I get emails and texts from. So it's cool. That's awesome. He's going to ask for a signed headshot now.

that's why the next question. Did you watch the show before coming on or how did you get started in it? So no, I didn't watch the show, right? What happened was I was recommended by a friend of mine who saw me in court. Her name was Flo. She saw me in court and I just happened to be like in playing clothes that day because I didn't have to do anything. I was just like picking up something from the courthouse. And she's like, yo, you should be on the show. And I look at her. I'm like, shut up, Flo. Like, what are you talking about? And she's like, no, like, I'm serious. Like, let me, like, get your picture and, like, sign you up and all this type of stuff.

So she, you know, signed me up for the show. And before you know it, I got somebody, you know, one of the producers reached out to me. And the rest, I guess, is history. I didn't make that, like, the first casting, I guess. But then after COVID, you know, I got a, they reached back out to me again. It was like, hey, you're still entering. I'm like, hell yeah. Like, let's do it.

You know, I still need a wife. I'm still single. What's up? I think you're a great addition to the show. Like, you were one of my favorites. And we, a bachelor, happy, I favorite, both of us. You were one of our favorites. And I mean, if you weren't, I wouldn't say it.

I appreciate that. She wouldn't. This is a compliment, Riley. Take it. Keep it real. I like it. I like that. I like you, Riley.

I'm very partial to attorneys, obviously. I'm also partial to black folks. I'm not mad. Hey, listen. But the third thing is, You were about your business on the show. And I think a lot of the guys were, but I don't know. I felt like you weren't, nothing was an act with you.

You were very much so yourself. You got along with the men in the house, but you were also very serious about pursuing Tasia. And at first I thought you were like really intense. And then I was like, you know what? No, he's focused on his relationship with Tasia. So, oh, no, go ahead. Go ahead. You're going to say, I was just going to say, I mean, yeah, I'm, listen, I'm,

I'm just, I'm about my business. I like to keep it real. And I knew, like, coming in this situation, like, time is of the essence. So I'm like, all right, let me, I got to kind of get to the point. All of this other nonsense, you know, people want to go back and forth and they want to argue about, you know, petty bullshit drama. I was like, you know, you know, save it for the next person. Let me just get in there.

Let me talk to Tation when she came in after the whole clear thing. And that's what I tried to do. and I thought I made the most of it, you know. I want to, so when Rachel says you're one of our favorites, I can attest to that because I obviously, you know, met you on the date that I hosted in the middle of the season. And I need to tell all of our listeners this right now because you were one of the guys that stuck out the most to me

because you were such a gentleman on that date. Like, you know, you're filming so much and there's so many people around doing there's so much going on, but you were one to kind of, I think you were the first one to greet both Sydney and myself and you were the one to say goodbye. You're like, nope, we're not leaving. We have to hug these girls goodbye. We have to thank them for this date. So for all the listeners out there, Riley, you are such a gentleman. And so since that date, you have been like one of my favorites since the beginning because I was saying about it started airing. So I do have to say that. And then, you know,

unfortunately we saw you go home last night and I will say this you gave one of the best exit interviews that I have ever seen on the show and I've been watching for a few seasons watching before my season and you were so heartfelt but you and I feel like this entire season when you spoke as Rachel said you weren't outrageous you weren't dramatic you weren't in all of the BS petty drama. But when you spoke, you spoke with so much conviction and so much power and weight behind it that I feel like the men really listened to you and took what you had to say to heart. And as did Tasia. And so going into the sad goodbye that we saw last night, because it was emotional, how has it been, how is it in that moment and how has it been since then watching it back? And, you know,

kind of having to relive those feelings. Oh, goodness. Okay. So in that moment when you You mean in the moment when I was talking to Tasha or in the exit interview? Both. Okay, so I'll take them one step at the time. Because I will say this. It felt like you said a lot in your exit interview that Tasia did not hear, probably until watching it back. Right. That's exactly.

Yeah. Okay, yeah, for sure. I didn't. I had trouble, I had more trouble expressing myself when I was talking to Tasia in that final moment, I guess. I think for me that was still the very next time I'm trying to put it

so that night when I saw Tasha and she was letting me go that was the first time I had seen her since I had talked to her about my family and stuff like that so in my mind I was still feeling I was still feeling pretty vulnerable and like my biggest

fear with opening up to people is, I even said it, you know, on the show is that I don't want people to think any less of me after I tell them. And so when I spoke to Tasha and she was letting me go directly after that, I was like, oh my goodness, like yeah, now she thinks a whole lot less than me. I must have been too emotional or just something, whatever it is I did. And I remember that entire day even before, you know, talking to Tatea that night, I woke up that morning like, I hope I did the right thing. Like, what did I just do? I don't know. So, yeah, it was very, very difficult for me to look her in the eye and, you know, have to talk

to her and knowing that I was on my way out when I really wanted to stay and I felt like I was making a connection with her and I had such strong feelings, excuse me. And then, yeah, when I went into the exit interview, I just kind of let it all flow out at least as much as I could without breaking down. I didn't want to have another crying scene like I had just the day before. I mean, not that it's something wrong with, you know, shedding tears, but just the way I felt, I was like, well, if I was too emotional before, I don't want to keep, you know, just, I don't know, it was just a bad sense.

I didn't feel well. Sorry. I thought it was really great to see your emotion because there are a lot of, I'm going to touch into stereotypes. Like, so one, being an attorney, you know, you don't show weakness, you know, like you don't show emotion. You're very, you read things in black and white. And then two, being a black man, like there's a lot of, you don't show emotion. You're supposed to be a certain way.

So to me, when I saw you be so vulnerable and so open, I thought it was extremely refreshing. And I thought it was great for the audience to see that. I'm sure it was hard for you. I know it was hard for you. you said it but I loved that you did it and you gave us that and you showed us another side of you and I think Tasha which she does say felt the same way and then you see her reassure you that the reason that you went home is not because you were open with her because I thought oh my gosh please don't I don't want I don't want this man to go back into a a hole where he feels like he can't

express himself because he did it and then this happened so I was so glad that she gave you that and kind of like gave you that freedom to say it's okay for you to be yourself i'll just tell you now women love that rightly we do we do that's good to know um i mean there's a lot actually to unpack there um because now that you you mention it um just about just the way i grew up right um and in my neighborhood and um just the community and a black community in general where you from we have i'm from Detroit Detroit okay okay yeah um so yeah i was born and raised on the Eastside Detroit. And in that community, I mean, we're just taught not to show that much emotion. And I mean, that's just the way that I got it. I got it from, you know, my father. I got it

from my uncles. We're just built to be more macho. For whatever reason, I don't know why. And so whenever you do show those type of emotions or you do cry, it's like, oh, you're being soft. You're not supposed to do something like that. And for me, it's like I'm learning. that the real strength is being able to, you know, be vulnerable and express yourself because otherwise, I mean, if, first of all, everybody has emotion, right? We try to act like, we try to act like we don't, but that's not the case. And if you just hold it all in, it comes out in this big rage all at the end. And that is really what I grew up on. It was just a bunch of, you know, men and like my father, he was a very troubled guy.

and he would hold all of his anger in and then when a very, very minor thing ticked him off, he's just, you know, losing it. Yeah. And I was just kind of like, you know, that's not that's not the type of man, I want to be. So, you know, in that situation,

when it was time for me to actually open up and talk to Tisha, I was very hesitant. It was very, very difficult for me, but I was like, hometown's the next week, you know, at the end of the day. She, I wanted to be able to meet my family, but we have to talk about some things beforehand. I don't think it's fair to her or myself not to bring these type of things up.

We're talking about getting married, okay? And that's what I'm about. I want to be open and honest and transparent. And so I just kind of let it flow as best I could and just get through it. I didn't know that I would break down like I did, but it happens, I guess. Did you, and I wanted to phrase this in the right way,

so it seems like, When Tasia did say goodbye to you and you left, did you, like, was this in the back of your mind the entire time until you saw her again on stage at Mental All when she's like, you know, it wasn't because you were vulnerable and you shared this story with me of why it ended. Did you carry that weight and like the what ifs and the wise until you saw her again? Or were you, once you came back home and were able to be with your friends and family, you know, back to your normal life and routine, did that help you in any way? Or did you need that? that closure from her at mental all to have her, you know, basically reassure you face to face that it wasn't because of the story that you shared, you know, of why you parted ways. Right. I needed that closure 100%. I was back in my apartment in New York and it was really on my mind. I mean, I was kind of, I don't want to have going crazy, but it was really just bugging me. And I'm like, man, I don't seem to be able to get this right. And I know I had these things in my mind, I know I need to talk to, you know, my potential spouse about

these type of things, but am I doing it the wrong way? I mean, I am still single. Something obviously is not working. I've been in relationships and not panning out. So what is it that I'm doing wrong? And I'm like, all right, maybe, and I was thinking, okay, well, maybe if I didn't tell her, maybe she would have thought something else of me and then maybe I would have made it to hometowns and, you know, whatever. And I'm just like, okay, So when we got to the mental, oh, that was one of the things like I wanted to talk to her about. And I mean, even if she would have told me like, hey, yeah, that was it. At least it would have been an honest answer.

And then I can go back and I can work on myself and just try to get that together. But then when she told me like, no, that's not the case at all. Like she appreciated me sharing and stuff like that. I was like, okay, that's great. So I did do something right. We just didn't work out. And that's fine. You know, she can find, like, because we didn't work out, I know that, you know, she went on and she was connecting with a lot of other.

guys in the house I saw it back on the show and I was like damn it I really wanted to connect more but I mean it's um because you didn't have a one-on-one right no I didn't yeah so here I'll say it I didn't like what she said to you when she sent you home because I felt like and I understand the confusion because I felt like she flipped it on you and she said to you I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable about me meeting your family. And I thought, oh, my God, that's so unfair. Like, let him make that decision. That's not fair for you to use that as an excuse as to why you're sending him home. I would have preferred it like, hey, I have a deeper connection with other people. We just, we just didn't get there. You haven't had a one-on-one, blah, blah, blah.

So, like, I felt bad for you in that moment because, and I could see your frustration and you even question her, like, why did you bring me this far? Then why did this happen? And you seemed very confused so one I want to know did you really think that you know like you were going far and like prior to watching the show now that you are watching the show does it make more sense to you why you went home wait so I'm trying to understand you the first question was did you did you feel like yeah prior to watching the show like when you were in the moment did you feel You were really going far on the show, even without the one-on-one, even hearing how she ended things.

Did you really in that moment think I have a chance to be the one at the end? And then the second part is, now that you are watching the show, does it all make sense to you? Okay. So that's a, that's difficult for me to answer because I don't know at what point, like, during the show, you're asking me, like, did I think I could go far? Was it like when I first saw her? Was it at the end?

At the end. At the end. when she came into the room and she had just sent Blake M. Hall and then she calls you. Okay, in that moment that I think I could still make it to hometowns. Wow.

Yes, because I was still there and I was part of my confusion. I was like, well, I haven't had a one-on-one, and I've heard that, you know, people who at this point, if you're going to be at the home visits, you've more than likely had a one-on-one already. But I was like, there has to be a reason why she still has me here.

So I'm still hopeful. And I know the feelings that I have Tatia. So I'm like, all right, I'm going to just run with that and try to stay positive and just keep going. So yeah, in that moment, I guess I did, you know, still think I had a shot. But now that you're watching the show, what do you think about the relationship that you have with Tasia versus other people? Oh, yes. Now here comes the good answer. I mean

To be honest I was getting my ass kicked Like listen I saw When I first saw I think The first episode when she got there I think it might have been

You know Brendan he had his one-on-one And I saw how Romantic it was And then I'm watching Ben His one-on-one And I'm watching Zach And I am like

Yo I am light years behind These men right now What's going on So no to be like I didn't think I was going to make it to hometowns based on all of that stuff that I saw until like at the very end I guess we I started to come alive a little bit so there was like okay there's a little glimmer you know of hope but I think it was just too late I think she had built a solid foundation you know Ivan and all those guys well before I had my well I guess I had

opportunity to open up but well before I actually did open it. It's such a weird concept like I think for any season as a lead or even as a contestant you think you know what's going on you think you're you know you're living with the guys you hear and and see enough but it's really not until you watch the season back and it's airing week by week where you start to pick up on so much that you actually didn't know what was going on you see these other relationships unfold like I remember watching my season back being like oh my there was so much I missed with all of these guys that I had no idea what was going on

so it's just it's a really weird thing because you're living in it like this is your daily life for two months basically when you're in this bubble dating somebody and then you see these other relationships where you do then notice that they are either progressing a lot faster or a lot slower than you so it's

just it's very trippy um what was it about Tisha that made you fall so hard for her? Oh yeah um like beyond the obvious you know right yeah no i got you i got you um for me it was i'm a guy i like i like when a woman can like take control show some initiative um and i mean i i don't mind being the the dominant figure or something like that however you want to put it

I guess. But when I see a woman in charge of her situation, which she was throughout the season. And then, you know, she was actually very caring and very thoughtful. And she listened to everybody too. That's one of the big things that I'm about. I just wanted somebody that was extremely nice and kind. And she was about that. She would, you know, listen to everything that we said and take the time to get to know every single person.

I think that was one of the differences when Tasha actually. actually got on the show. Not that I didn't have you know adequate time with Claire. I mean, I did but you could just tell it was a completely different feel once the Tasia got there. So I love that about it. All you guys

had a different different reaction. The energy was way, way, way, way. We love Claire here too, but it was just so funny like the reaction was so different. So let's get into the Mintel all. First of all, you had the best seat in the house. That was next to

Bennett. Oh my God. I'm a Bennett fan. Okay. I feel like, really? Yes. You didn't know Riley. So I,

we got to talk now. Yes. If you check my social, there's a eulogy that we did for Bennett for him going on and coming back. I like, here's the thing. Do I think he's great for Tasia? Absolutely not.

Do I think he is great for me? as a viewer, 100%. He's charming and condescending. And I love it. I love the, he's a character. But I'll reserve my benefit question.

I know people are sick of me talking about him. So I am curious on your thoughts about him, but I want to talk about you and Yosef. Because I, first of all, I was mad they brought him back. And then I was mad they brought him back, knowing that he was going to react that way. you the camera was on you a lot so like you are fidgeting you are clearly uncomfortable but uncomfortable

not because he makes you uncomfortable you look uncomfortable because you're like i want to get at him and if there weren't cameras here i would handle this situation a completely different way i actually said that on my season and they couldn't and they couldn't hear and it's cameras weren't here we can't do this a completely different way about one of the females in the house but i felt like that's how you were, I mean, you showed so much restraint because he was, he could completely be an asshole, but everybody else kind of had to be in line. So I just want to know, what were your, your emotions and your thoughts that you felt as you were sitting there watching him still be, if not even more, the disrespectful demon that he is? Now, see, for me, with Yosef, he's, I can't stand

at Yosef, okay, I'm just keep it bro, I can't stand a guy like Yose. um guys like him they think they can move and talk and behave any way that they want to you know um and nothing's going to happen to him um and i don't really know where they get that mentality from but what bothered me was the way he behaved towards claire i mean you have a situation where yeah you may not have agreed with um you know the strip dodgeball date a date that you didn't even go on, here you are again, speaking on behalf of the group, which is something that you're not supposed to be doing. Nobody wants you talking on their behalf. You know what I'm saying? Put you on this pedestal. You know, who made you the representative of this, of the bastards on the show? But when I see a man yelling at a woman like that, all I see is abuse. That's all I'm, that's the first thing that comes in my mind. You need to be raising your voice and screaming and hollering and calling somebody names like that. I just,

just know, and I know that's just from my childhood. I grew up and I saw a lot of it. Men, um, treating women, uh, poorly and making them feel bad just because it makes them feel good and it makes them feel superior. And that's exactly what I saw with him. And I'm like, what are you doing? You can talk to her and you can tell her that you disagree, but you don't have to yell at her and scream at her and get in her face and tell her that she would be a bad mother. Whatever he was telling classes. I'm like, okay, what's wrong with you? Somebody needs to put you in your place. All you need is one good ass with me. You know what I mean? I mean, y'all might, y'all might have to cut that out. But I'm just saying, all the take is one. All the take is one. But I chill. Like, listen, I'm

like, all right, let me chill. I mean, I'm not the guy. I'm going to talk to you. And, you know, I can't save the entire world. I can't save a bunch of guys like yo. So there are people out there like him who believe, you know, in his message and his rhetoric. And, you know, I got some of those people commenting at me, you know, on social media and stuff like that. And that's fine or whatever, do whatever you got to do, but I just, I just don't like people like that. Do you know that he's posed on social media in his own boxers shirtless while he was out there talking about other people? There are pictures of him in his boxers shirtless. Yes, shout out. I cannot, I do not know who showed that to me. Have we not talked about this in the

podcast? Really? Is he the one that you called lunch meet? No, that was Spencer. We can talk about him too. Oh, that was Spencer. Oh, my God. I was going to say, if it was Yosef, I wish that you would have just brought out some like deli meat during mental law and just hand it to him. Missed opportunity. Who were you cool with in the house? Who's I cool with in the house? Like who you closest with?

See, we're shifting gears. I feel like it was something else I was going to say about Yosef. Oh no, go ahead. I mean, we could talk about Yosef. Did you see how tight Yosef's button was on his shirt? I said, even his buttons don't want to be a part of this situation. They're like, give us free. Let me go.

Yo, that man was O.D. he's wilding um nah but you know actually i've given him enough enough attention um so yeah i will move on to the next thing who's like cool in the house um i was cool with quite a few guys to be honest um i was cool with i was cool with demar demar demar's my guy i was cool with easy uh Ivan um Jason uh uh Jordan C i actually really really connected with him a lot he's his glasses right Yeah, he's glasses. Yeah, yeah, the guy that kind of looks like Shemar Moore, but not really.

He's the brooch. Not really. He's got, he's the brooch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was cute. I mean, don't, don't, don't gas him up, okay? He wasn't Shamar. He wasn't Shamar, but he was, I mean, but he was, he was, he was,

you all, the men, y'all were attractive and had careers. That is not a normal combination we see. I mean, people are giving your, your group, the group of men, the title of, the best cast we've ever seen. I mean, there weren't fake jobs. You guys, like, you're sitting in your office right now. You know what I mean? Like, you're still at work.

I am. Oh, go ahead. Oh, no, no, no, no, keep going, sorry. I was just going to say, no, I appreciate that. You know, I appreciate the love that we got and people saying that, you know, we were the best group of guys and the, I don't know, classiest, whatever you want to call us and we were professional. Yeah, I like to be a part of something like that.

glad that, you know, we could represent Bachelor Nation in that way. I'm glad I was a part of this first class of exceptional guys or whatever people are calling us. I don't know. I'm glad I could just be a part of it. I do take, you know, my profession seriously. But then I also, I'm like, I'm like, why too? Let me get out here and have some fun and let me do my thing. I'm not just all business. I know it seemed like I was all business on the show, but I had a lot of fun on the show too, okay? I smiled a lot. I cracked a lot of jokes. You know what I mean? Like, you just didn't get to see that side of me, which is cool. Obviously, I was just going to say, obviously, that there are more conversations, you know, that take place. It's only a two-hour

show. So how good was it to be able to experience the Bachelorette? And obviously it was a much different experience this season because you couldn't travel. You were stuck at La Kinta. but how good was it to be able to get out of work and this normal life and this sad, scary, uncertain pandemic and quarantine and be able to say, like, I'm going to live at this beautiful resort in Palm Springs for hopefully two months, meet a bunch of hopefully cool dudes, and just be able to take place in something as unique as the Bachelorette. Listen, I was hype about the experience. As soon as I found out, you know, I could go. just to be able to be unplugged, you know, from the world, my email's not going off, my phone's not going on. I was like, yeah, you can keep all of that. I don't want any of that.

Let me just unplug for a second. No clients, no bosses, none of that. Let's just go, and I can focus on finding the family. I mean, that's, I love that, everything about that. And, yeah, that's really it. That's good. So this then leads me into my next question, because, you know, every year we have a good old thing called Paradise

happening. Would you ever grace us with your presence on the beaches of paradise? Listen, I like the beach, okay? Don't get it twisted. I like the beach. It's just something I would consider. You know, why not? I'm still single. I still need a wife. Still want, you know, my two daughters. And I ain't going to get them by myself. So the beach is open. Last week we can start talking about that, you know? I think it'd be a good chance for you to show the other side because it's it's not as heavy and as intense it's more and i like becca and i we've never been to paradise in that way but it's like for my friends who've gone and then have been successful in their own relationships thereafter they talk about the ease that there is in paradise

of course there's always the drama but you seem to do so well in avoiding drama with everything that was going on from clare season into tautious season how is it that you were able to stay out of all the drama Um, because I knew what I wanted, to be honest, at the end of the day, I'm just, I'm only here to find a wife. I mean, all of these other nonsense that you want to go back and forth with, that's fine. I only like to speak, you know, if I only need to speak if I have something of value, value to say. Otherwise, I can shut the hell up because what's the point in me talking to y'all? And I'm not here for y'all. Yeah. I don't care about that. But, you know, when Tasha comes in in the room, okay, now it's time for me to talk. Now it's time for me to open up or, you know, make her laugh or do whatever I got to do. bring her, you know, one week anniversary cake or something like that, like whatever. But yeah, with the rest of the drama, you know, giving people mustache socks and all that. I'm like, I don't care about that. It seems like such a simple concept, but somehow every season, some sucker falls for all of this.

It happens. Well, so I want to piggyback off of Rachel's question because obviously we did see you stay out of the drama. But when you did insert yourself, you just seemed to carry yourself with. with such grace and elegance. And you, this is more of a selfish question for me, too, because I could take some notes from you. But you just remained so calm and eloquent, even in these very emotionally charged, intense, heated situation.

So how did you find that balance? And how did you know, okay, like, now it's my time to speak up, but I don't want to cross a line where I become, you know, maybe more of a Bennett or I don't even want to compare you, Yosef, because I don't even think that's possible. But how did you still stay so, calm and have just such this like kind even demeanor through it all even when you were still having to address the men and some of this drama um i think that is something that i've just learned

throughout the course of my life um i've seen people be in situations and they start arguing they want to yell for whatever reason they want to yell and scream and that's how they think they get their point across. And actually, it's the opposite. When you start to yell, people stop listening to you. They can only hear you screaming. And sometimes it only instills fear any other person. And they may do what you say only because they're scared. Not because they want to in the moment, they get away from you. They're going to do the opposite. And so for me, I was just like, all right, I have to be able to have conversations and arguments with people in a very calm matter. I can be stern, but do it calmly

so they understand and they take in the things that you actually say and that was what I wanted to get across when I was on the show and sometimes I had to get a little bit more stern than what I would have liked to but

some of those guys deserve it. I was like, you know, Yosef to hell with that guy. Listen, I had to let him know. It was appropriate. At one point you're like, you don't speak for me. Oh, that's exactly what I would have said. It was very appropriate. appropriate.

Riley, why don't you care for Bennett? All right. See, okay, let me put it this way. To say I don't care for a minute. I mean, listen, I'm not just, it's not that I don't have anything against the man. But, yo, I mean, you saw, America saw it. You see, you can see, you know, his, the way he talks down to people. I mean, he can be very condescending.

Now, actually, Bennett, he may have a situation where he actually doesn't know that the way he talks to people is offensive. He may actually truly believe that it's perfectly fine and talks to people that way. And he doesn't realize, like, the impact that I can have on, you know, other people, even though to him, it seems fine. he's just not there is no I don't there's no empathy there and that's my thing I'm like if you don't

you don't have empathy I can't I can't deal with you like you just seem like an ass and that's well rightly there was a point in the in the mental law where he says

I would challenge anybody to say that I spoke to them in a condescending way and nobody raised their hand but Damar could let's see this is where I've been it I'm like give me an example example.

Bennett was making the example. And DeMarle was like, well, you speak about younger people and I'm one of the younger guys. You didn't speak to me directly, but you talk about younger people. So I tell you why I didn't raise my hand. Yes. Because Bennett didn't come to me with that. He knew better. You knew better.

That's what you're saying. Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying. All right. So listen. You know, my father didn't give a bunch of great advice, but he was right about this. He was like, listen, people know who to mess with. That's so true. You come into a room and you see a bunch of people and, like, I can pick on this guy.

I can pick on this guy. Nope, I'm going to leave that guy alone. I'm going to this guy. Like, this is what you do. And in those situations, you know, not that I'm trying to just act like, you know, I'm big buffing bad or something like that. No. But I think I carried myself in a way where Bennett was like, I'd rather not.

And I was like, yeah, I think that was probably a wise call. And he just didn't come at me with it. So I didn't raise my hand. But, you know, I did have things to say to Bennett, you know, at the mental all about, you know, the way he behaved himself. And I'm not scared. And I even said on the show, you know, yeah, he's condescending. But he just never came at me. So, that's why I didn't raise my hand.

So very honest answer. And I understand that. Yeah, I'm not one to go out looking for the smoke. But if you want to smoke, listen, we can do this. That's all. So is it safe to say we're never going to see you. Bennett like going to brunch in New York together anytime soon. Yeah, you are both in New York.

Yeah. All right. Listen, I don't, I don't dislike Bennett, all right? I think, I think actually it would be a good idea if we went and had brunch or something like that to talk because I actually want to find some common ground with people. I think me and Bennett come from two totally different ends of the spectrum. We're talking about where we come from and how we come from. and how we grew up

and our backgrounds and stuff like that. It would be great to be able to discuss with Bennett just cultural things and life things. So when we do get in those situations, he'll know that you can't tell another grown man that they don't have three of the four

whatever of emotional intelligence or something like that. And I mean, even though you might actually believe they need to improve in those areas, nobody asked you for that. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's just one of those things. Like, if somebody offers that, like, hey, can you help me? All right, cool, but nobody asked you for that. And you didn't think about how Noah would take that and like how I would have took it. I would have been like, hey, hold on. Hold on, dog. That's not how I work. So. Yeah. Right. I'm sorry. This might be a little bit of a different demeanor than what I had, you know, on the cell. I'm sorry. No. That's what's beautiful about podcasting. So do we. That's a, it's a more freeing space to just be. you and that's what our listeners want

like they want to get to know Riley they want to see the other side of you they want you to give us the inside scoop of what was going down in the house and who you were cool with and I mean do you feel like you missed out on not being able to travel because we went both Becca and I I didn't meet

you but both Becca and I were at the Lakinta and six days there was enough for us let's just say that yeah it was hot out it was to 20 degrees some nights. Mm-hmm. But do I feel like I missed out on traveling?

Yeah. Not that. See, I didn't watch the show before. So I didn't really know about all of the traveling and stuff like that. But not everybody's been talking to me about it. I'm like, hell yeah, I missed out. I want to go to, I don't know, Paris or wherever they would have taken us. Wait, so you don't know me and Becca.

You don't know us. No. Yeah, you never. So you don't know where formal. bachelor's. You don't know anything about us. We could have been whoever we wanted to be on this, Becca. This is true. Well, no. I didn't watch the, I didn't watch the show. Well, I did, but I mean, I met Becca when I was there. So I knew she was a former badgeret because Tasha said it. And then I didn't know that you were a former bassorette because it was crazy big news when they were like,

this is the first black woman vassarette. And I mean, how wouldn't I know about that? I was like paying attention to that. So, yeah, I knew who you were and all that type of stuff. And actually, I was excited to meet you today because I mean, because I have friends like, yo, you met Rachel? Have you met now? No, I haven't. Do I know? Do I know? I was like, yo, that's what I'm saying. Circles are small. I feel like I'm two degrees of separation from everybody. I'm sure we have mutual friends. Yeah, I'm sure we probably do. I don't think they know you though. But they were just like, yo, they were like, yo, if you meet a, tell what's up? So I'm like, all right.

So speaking of your friends, how has it been for them? Do you watch the show back with them with any friends or family? And how is it, do the Riley that they know, like, how do they feel watching you on the big screen? Oh, my God. So I do watch it with some friends in mine. But it's funny because I got a call from one of my close cousins. He was like, it's just insane watching you back. because for one, like, I mean, I know, like, you like to have a good time and all this other type of stuff,

but I've never seen you, you know, interact with a woman before, which they find hilarious. They knew I was a stern guy, but they didn't know, I guess they kind of knew I was kind of up in your face a little bit. Like, I could be that way. But they were just, they knew I was reserved. And so to see me on television, they're like, that is completely out of your character. There's no way in hell that you go on a television show like this and start to open up and express yourself and really say anything at all because that's not what you do. So it was a pretty big shock to them, but they loved it. They laughed.

I remember when I got the Rose, I think, from Claire, and they just had a ball with that. They were like, look at you. What are you talking about boys and men? You're too young for that anyway. And I'm like, I mean, I like boys of men. And then, you know, with Tasia, the whole thing, they was just like, for one day absolutely love tation

but just the way like you know I carried myself in that and opened up to her and talked about my family they were like it took you I haven't told you know

a lot of people about you know my name change and stuff like that and the people that do know they're like it took you years to tell me that you know what I'm saying

so the fact that you were able to overcome whatever you overcame and tell it to For one, it must mean that you had strong feelings for. And two, we can tell, like, they gave me compliments on how I was growing as a person. And I'm just like, I appreciate, that's what I appreciated about the show. It allowed me, you know, to see a side of myself that I did not expect, you know, to be able to reach, especially in such a short period of time, it was just a few months.

but I mean it was I mean it's great we always joke about this that like you it really is therapeutic to you're because you're always in ITMs and you're talking about your feelings and you're just in a way that you never have before and it's really is a beautiful thing and then the show is and you got all these feelings and you're like who do I talk to and your friends at home don't understand you're like let's just talk about it and so you see a lot of people get into relationships after the show because they're just so open and read to like meet someone and talk about how they feel I mean you'll see it you'll start seeing it happen with the men and I will say it's very it's it's obviously difficult and very uncomfortable at first I don't think anyone's used to opening up that quickly to a partner let alone all of all of America if you will but but I will say this it will only set you up for success and success oh my God what did I just say making it up words we'll only set you up for success for future relationships wherever that may be if you find it on your own walking down the street or in paradise who knows um but riley we have one more question but it's been such a pleasure

to watch you and to have you on and and to just pick your brain a little bit more to get a whole new side of riley that that america should should be listening to um so before you had uh we asked all of our guests this what was your rose and thorn of the season so yeah my high point actually would be the fact that I was able to open up and express myself and Tasha was she allowed me to do that. I develop, you know, strong enough connection with her. And she made me feel comfortable enough to open up and tell her to things. That was definitely, you know, the roles. But then also the great guys you meet, you know, there too. And the fun that you have with them, like I said earlier, it's a two-hour show, you know. So you don't really get

to see the conversations that you get to have, you know, with some of the guys. And I'm actually, you know, I didn't say this earlier because I asked me who I'm cool with. I got to say, as much as you like Bennett, Noah is my God. No, it's my God. No one's my God. Really, thank you so much for joining us on the show. It's been so great to get to know. No, it was on last week and he was delightful, I will say.

And I felt like I was. He did win Rachel over a little bit. he's a good dude he is he got caught up in bad situation you know um but we had a lot of the mustache yeah we can blame the mustache i actually have to ask you this let's let's put this question somewhere in okay so obviously before you came on like i'm creeping or we can call it research on your your socials and stuff um one you have a baltimore accident has anybody ever told you that? You have a Baltimore accent.

The way you say two, it's a very Baltimore. We'd say two. Two, two. He's got to say it in a sentence. He's got to say, Eric Bigger has a Baltimore accident. I keep saying,

accident. I'm going to the store. If I say, I'm going to the store, is that it? No, no, it's not there. It's what you can't, when you're comfortable talking. Okay, so in doing research,

you follow on Instagram one of the girls that's going to be on Matt James' season. Oh, shit. How do you know Chelsea? How do I know Chelsea? How do I know Chelsea?

How the hell do I know Chelsea? New York is small. New York is small. Did you date her? No, I didn't date her. How? Now I need a good. What one?

Chelsea is a fashion model. The runway model. Oh, yeah. Right? Not IG, not catalog, not print. She likes her. Yeah, we like her. It could have been because when this was, I have no idea.

I'm just trying to figure out how small New York really is. You know, like I was hoping. New York is a small play, but some dating history there. No, not at all, not even a little bit. I don't even, it's probably just somebody I follow because I don't even think I know her like I mean I don't know her like nowhere nowhere I don't know because she'll be on Matt James

this season so I don't let me pull up a photo this is Chelsea can you see that okay yeah no yeah okay yeah not I've seen her on that same on that same lineup I've gone through like Matt's things I've seen her on that same line okay I'm just being messy for a second

I'm just being messy I don't know like that look at you trying to start something oh I do got a research that fact that you piece that together is crazy to me Because you know what's, when I look at who he follows, she's like one of the first people that pops up. So I was like, oh, I was like, she was familiar. She looks like, we just went through the girl's bios.

And I was like, oh, okay. Sorry. I was trying to make something. I was trying to get something popping. There wasn't. But you still have to give us your thorn. Oh, my thorn. Okay, what's my thorn?

And it can be, you know, when you had to give the orgasm sound for a minute in the loudspeaker, whatever. Actually, I like that. we didn't see that, but I was like, I was cool with that because mine was different. So, I was a whole lot different. I thought it was funny. That was one of, like, the fun things that I was able to do. You and type were a good team together. Yeah, yeah, it was dope.

But actually, I mean, it's probably something, probably something with Yosef, me having to get into it with Yosef and set him straight. You know what I'm saying? That was definitely not a high point for me. I didn't want to have to show that type of emotion, you know, get a little steamy like that with him real quick. he wanted to smoke he needed it so that's when we were Riley it has been such a pleasure having you on like I said you were one of our favorites from the very beginning so it's good to finally have you on you're in a safe comfortable space

obviously the listeners want to hear from you and your perspective and I also I'm going to be taking notes on how to be more cool comment collected from here and out after speaking with you oh you got this I appreciate you all having me it was good to see you again Beckett was very nice to meet you I can, you know, tell all my people back at home, like, yo, I finally met Rachel. She just don't, let's get it. Oh, of course.

I'm going to send them all to love. Please do. When all this is over with, we hope to meet you on the other side of it. Seriously. You're great. Rachel's just trying to get out to New York and brunch with you and Bennett, to be honest. But I come to New York on the regular, because of COVID, you know, like I haven't been able to come. It's all good.

Are you coming to L.A.? I can come to L.A., but, hey, there's no. There's no beef with me and Bennett, all right? I'm just going to throw that out there. There's no beef with me and Bennett. It's all good. We know, we know, we know. But thank you so much.

We're going to let you get back to work. You got a brief, a motion, something to do. Please don't remind me. What a sweetheart. You were right, Becca. You said it from the moment you met him. He was one of your favorites. I wasn't slow to get there, but I just was like, he didn't stand out, you know,

because the drama was standing out. But as the men started to go. way, it was like, man, I really liked this Riley. And I was going to compliment him on choosing the name Riley since he chose his name. I was like, good choice. I like the name, right? Yeah. Okay, so as we

had him on, the more I kept thinking, and he's talked about this with Tasha on the show, how he wants his two girls, he's going to make a phenomenal father. Hashtag girl dad. Yeah, like he's, he just, his demeanor, like he, I don't, there's just something about him. And

and I wanted to tell him this, and I didn't want it to seem like it's not a compliment because it is. But he's just not like TV, you know? And I kind of think it's refreshing that he went on and was like, yeah, I'm just going to give this a shot. I might not be the most outspoken, loud, crazy, dramatic in your face type of man. Yeah. But he overall, I think he was like the steadiness that I think any bachelorette probably could have used on a season. Yeah.

I wish he would have gone farther. I think there, I won't name. names, but I like him more than some of the men that are left for sure. And I think that he could be really good and challenged Tasha and also be like that rock for her and as using that calming force for her. And yeah, ladies, he's single. So make sure, you know, you slide up in those DMs. Yes. Or maybe we'll see him on the beaches of paradise. I don't want him to go to paradise. Make him The Bachelor. I don't want him to see it.

If he's on Paradise, please give him a good woman. Let him find a woman, first woman on the beach that he connects with, and leave them alone. Like, now I want to protect Riley. Leave Riley alone. Yeah, it's always great having all these guys on. I will say this

though, Rachel. Is it just me or does this season seem like it's just dragging on and on and like never ending? Never ending. Yes, Becca. I share your sentiments. I mean, like, one of the reasons I love Real Housewives is because it's only an hour I'd be willing to go to change.org

and start the petition to make The Bachelor one hour. Even if it was Monday and Tuesdays one hour each, just like, can we spread it out? You know? It's a lot. Yeah.

Speaking of ending, it has come for today, but only for today because we have back-to-back episode, so we will be back again tomorrow. Okay, you guys, we only have three more. more episodes this season, including one that airs tonight.

We also have a brand new episode of Bachelor Happy Hour out tomorrow morning, and you will not want to miss our guests. Exactly. It's a good one, so please tune in, and if you don't know where to find us on social by now, let me help you out. On Instagram, you can find us at Bachelor Happy Hour and then at Batch Happy Hour on both Facebook and Twitter. And last but not least, people, do not forget to subscribe to our podcasts on Apple Podcasts.

Spotify, the Wonderry app, or wherever you are listening to us right now. Yay! I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the Psychology Podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, you're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier.

Ignoring is easier. Denials is easier. Complex problem solving takes effort. Listen to the psychology podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's important that we just reassure people that they're not alone, and there is help out there. The Good Stuff podcast, Season 2, takes a deep look into One Tribe Foundation, a non-profit fighting suicide in the veteran community. September is National Suicide Prevention Month, so join host Jacob and Ashley Schick as they bring you to the front lines of One Tribe's mission. One Tribe saved my life twice.

Welcome to Season 2 of the Good Stuff. Listen to the Good Stuff podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, my name is Enya Umanzor. And I'm Drew Phillips. And we run a podcast called Emergency Intercom. If you're a crime junkie and you love crimes, we're not the podcast for you. But if you have unmedicated ADHD... Oh my God, perfect.

And want to hear people with mental illness. Psychobabble. Yes, yes. Then Emergency Intercom is the podcast for you. Open your free IHeart Radio app. Search Emergency Intercom and listen now. This is an IHeart podcast.