Bachelor Happy Hour - Friendsgiving: Part 2

Episode Date: November 27, 2019

The first-ever Bachelor Happy Hour Friendsgiving continues with more stories from “The Bachelor” and a game of Never Have I Ever! Joining hosts Rachel and Bryan Abasolo are Kendall Long, Joe Amabile, Katie Morton, Eric Bigger and Tayshia Adams. Plus, don’t miss a surprise call-in from new Bachelor Peter.Be sure to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Hey, guys, we are back with part two of our Bachelor Happy Hour Friendsgiving. Everybody welcome Brian, Joe, Kendall, Eric, Tasha, and Katie. We're going to flip this around a little bit. We're going to talk about the legendary Bachelor feuds. So we're going to start off with the most recent season Luke P. versus basically everyone in the house. What side are you on, guys?

I mean, is anybody Luke P? I'm just confused how he has so much power in that house that I feel like he had all the power amongst all the guys. Definitely emotional power. I didn't understand that. I was there the first night, and I mean, barely there, but he was captivating. I thought he was going to take it to the end,

so I can see how it was immediate threat type of power. Because when I saw him with Hannah, I was even shocked, and I feel like I have a pretty good intuition about people. And I was like, yeah, he's going to the end immediately. Their connection was just like a no-brainer. So maybe that's how, I don't know. Also, remember like five guys met Hannah ahead of time? And you could totally see that there was like something there between Luke P and Hannah.

100%. The second I saw that, I was like, he's going to the end. Oh, he was a catch. I hadn't even watched the season, obviously, the season hadn't started yet. But, yeah. So maybe, like, everyone had seen that prior to even going to the show, and so they knew that there was already a little connection. I didn't know he was one of the guys that met her before.

Yeah, I didn't know. He, like, came up and, like, went, like, this to Chris Harrison, like, right in between, and, like, oh, no. I think, I think he was an easy target. Yes. Basically. I think he just, he was, you know, it was easy to mess with him. And I think he would wear his emotions on his sleeve, and everyone knew it. And eventually, it just.

snowballed and it just became he was... He took it so seriously and he put all of himself into it and I think in that way I think he really loved her I think even when he said it

at the beginning I'm like this guy's crazy but I actually believe him I really think he was into her you believe him Joe you didn't believe Tasia a few weeks ago Tasha

Tisha's tall a ghost The air conditioning was on 65 I believe Tasia Thank you. I believe you, Joe.

I'm in Tadja. I think that there's not a lot to talk about when you're in the Bachelor bubble. So that is why he was such of like polarizing. Well, he is a polarizing figure, but there's just like, what else you're going to talk about? You're talking about Hannah. You're talking about your feelings. And you're talking about Luke P. Because he was just so much drama.

Like that is, what else are going to talk about? He was very bold basically saying like, this is my woman. Yeah. Right? So I feel like she's going to believe it. I think there's a different way. Like when you, he got the first impression rose, correct? So I got the first impression rose, but I think there's a different way to handle it.

I was very low-key. I was humble. I wasn't boasting about getting the first impression rose or anything to the other guys in the house. I think. So the fact that he got the first impression rose, he was a target, and then you add on that he's basically going to let you know about it. Yeah. That is, oh, sorry. I think that is what rubbed people the wrong way.

Yeah, he almost expected a little bit more after getting that first impression rose. I think that he went into one of her interview rooms or something. He was expecting her to give her, like, even more attention. He was like, well, I'm entitled to this now because I know I'm at the top. And I think that started really rubbing people the wrong way. And then so they started nitpicking because all you've got to do is guy chats in that house. So you're going to guy chat about Luke P. 100%. You have nothing else to talk about.

Well, I do believe just to feed off of Joe because he went home when. Well, went home when came back. But I think he was like final two He was like final three Yeah he was final four But if he was like final two I believe A final three he probably would have Me too

Because she was convinced Yeah I was like wow I think if he would have been separated From the guys How Final Four is It The attention would no longer be on him

And he would have just Taking it to the top Absolutely So are you team Luke P or everyone else I'm no team It's hard because he was definitely ostracized and because of that

I think everyone jumped on the bandwagon I mean it's a defense mechanism to try to be a part of a group because we find safety in groups. I feel like it was he was unjustifiably ganged up on at the same time He did not react to the best way to that right right, but how do you react when you're backed into a corner? It's like the fight or flight either you're gonna back down or you're gonna puff up your chest and you're gonna you know Show them for the man that you believe you are yeah A completely new environment with all these people you don't even know and he's trying to prove yourself like it's a lot He would be judged in a different way so there really was no winning for him

I feel like we missed out on some scenes. I feel like there was more, because the guys were so passionate about their feelings towards him. I'm like, we're missing something here, right? Like, there's some stuff. She has one from that season here. And Hannah was so passionate about him that we're missing some of the good. That's right.

But she said it. Yeah, she came out and said, we're missing some of the, you know, like I saw, I know my relationship with him. I'm privy to things that you guys aren't. So it goes both ways. Hannah's not stupid. She wouldn't have kept him around if it was only. that exactly and I think she wanted it to be him at the end for so long and he kept on

disappointing her and she's like stop it just be cool yeah stay cool yeah stay cool calm down I see her just like doing side eye just like you stop it right now I will say that remember when he went she took him on the date in um was it Santorini mm-hmm that they went to did I make that it's Greece they were in Greece yeah and she took him on the date and they flew I think they did it they flew to Santorini I don't know if I'm making that up but Okay, they flew to Santorini. The way he was with her, like, when they were walking around town, I was like, wow, maybe this is what she sees that we don't.

Because he was really nice and really sweet. And I thought, okay, he's different with her than he is with everyone else. 100%. Not a good characteristic, but, yeah. So I guess no team, because I can't really truly judge the situation because, like, I watched the edit. I mean, we all did, I guess. What about, did anyone's, Do you want to watch my season?

Yeah, that's what I want to say. I'm just curious about Kerman and Taylor. What happened? Emotional intelligence happened. I remember that night. So we are in Wisconsin and it's freezing cold and we're outside and it would have been beautiful. We could have enjoyed it if it hadn't been so cold. So anyways, it was that night that Taylor decided to confront Corinne and she brought up this emotional intelligence.

And Corinne was like, what is that? I have that. I didn't know what that meant at that time. And I think there was a line. I kept saying, what the fuck is emotional intelligence? We were like so out of it that night. But that's what triggered it.

But I guess there really was no basis. There were people who, and I think you just have to be one or two ways in that. There were people who allowed certain people's actions to affect them. Rather than, to quote, Hannah, staying in your own lane and just being you, like the way Brian, you said you were on the season, people would allow someone else's behavior to affect their behavior. And so that is what Taylor allowed Corinne to do. I really think Taylor could have gone a lot farther in the season if she had not let Corinne get to her.

And then it ultimately ended up being her demise and going home. I honestly, at the time, was Team Corinne because I was really close with Corinne. It's just a relationship you just didn't see on camera. I understood her, I felt like, better. than most people and I also took the time people would have girl chats about Corinne and she wouldn't even be there you know and I was just like I'm not participating in this mass this is ridiculous but I just think that at the time just Taylor just let her and she let her win and I think Corinne knew that she

had a hold on Taylor and so she would poke a little bit when it would come to her and you know it worked it ended up getting her sent home yeah well I have a real question before we go to the next few did when you guys were on the show did you see it as a competition because I was always asked are you and I was like I don't I see it as a competition. No, because when it comes to the real world, like real world when you're dating, it's not so much, the person's going to like whoever they want to like. There's nothing you can say or do or manipulate that's going to get them to choose you over some other person.

So the way I saw it is like if this is the person that I'm actually meant to be with, they're not going to let what other people say affect their relationship with me. It was more so like a test for me. When I did like the whole two-on-one with Crystal, I was like either what she says is going to affect you and you're not the kind of person I want to be with or it's not and we're going to you know move on with our relationship yeah yeah go ahead go there you go yeah like I'll in my head I always thought Rachel's going to choose the best man for her yes and I if it wasn't me I didn't think it was an indictment on me I just thought you know what

my person is out there and it's not her and it is what it is like I gave my all to the process and she didn't pick me so it is what it is like yeah I would have been heartbroken but at the same time I knew that I gave it my all so eventually time would have healed that so I think speaking on like a person like Corinne and not to say Demi's like Karen she would kill me if she heard me say that but like Demi was very similar character in our house yeah I think like kind of like demi and Tracy it was like a similar situation like Demi knew she could poke at Tracy in that moment and she wouldn't have done it if Tracy didn't allow her or didn't feel so affected by it in that moment So, like, Demi was like, yeah, let's keep going.

She's, like, that type of person. I think Corinne had the same attitude. I think I commented on that. I was, like, whatever I was saying, I was like, that, how old is Demi? She's, like, that 23-year-old has that 30-year-old crying in a closet. Yeah. I remember. I was like, she really has a hold on her. 24.

Demi's 24. A more recent feud, and I'd really like to get you guys opinion on this one, especially those who know them, Nicole and Clay. What's going on? Yes. What happened? I know we're all right. I'm not going to speak all this.

I didn't even know there was a few. You're close. Yeah, I didn't know there was a feud either. But also at the same time, I even told Nicole, like, I'm saying out of this. Like, in my eyes, y'all are being petty, so I'm just going to bow out. Doesn't she have a man? No. I thought the room at the reunion, right?

Okay, so she did have. She never had a boyfriend. Okay. She was, like, talking to a guy that was in Miami, yes. Okay, so we can clear that up. I thought she had a man, and this whole time I was like, no. What is her man saying about this? Okay, no.

Well, what's, is, I don't even know. What's the issue? Yeah, because I'm paranoid. Who are they? Yeah. Well, I mean, I know what they are, but I know, I know towards the end, they broke up. They broke up. So it should be done and over with, say, that's what I mean.

Right. Now they're in this social media feud and I'm paraphrasing here, so correct me if I'm wrong, but basically they're just going at each other. I guess he's made some slight comments about her because the issue was that he wasn't ready to take their relationship to that level and so he's made comments that play into that and then she's made comments about him and his career

and yeah and now all the comments are stemming from places of her and like it's people are starting to take low blows yeah like what's the point? I don't get it just talking shit basically on social media yeah get on the phone guys just talking shit in front of everybody

a phone call I mean real conversation drama it's a fire that's only fed if you if you like feed it like fuel, right? I always talk about this when it comes to drama. Either you feed into it and you stoke the flame or you just kind of don't react and it sizzles out like it's such a refresh, like in the social media world, everything's so refreshed and lost. On to the next topic. So quickly it's like, you know, if you want it to keep going and you want there to be people talking about you, keep going with it. And in certain ways, not that I have a lot of knowledge about the topic,

it seems like maybe it's something that people are maybe holding on to. Yeah. And I think that even if they don't want it to be drama, there's a sense of pride in both of them. And, like, one person has to win. Yeah, it's like, you don't want to back down because now you made a huge point or a huge statement, both of them have made large statements. It's like, you don't want the other person to seem like they won over you, per se. So, yeah. Someone has to be the bigger person.

I just don't understand how people feel so big and bad by fighting with people over social media. I agree. Like, how, how, like, so you send an angry tweet or Instagram message or whatever, and you're like, ha-ha, I told them. And no one would ever say it to your face. Exactly. Like, that's like, like, come at me. You know what I mean? I just, I just don't understand the principle of arguing over social media.

I really don't. So I hope they stop. I hope they figure it out. And they just separate. There's a reason it didn't work out. Now we're seeing it all play on social media. and I just hope that they can, like, you know, find their peace. Talk without an audience because I feel like when you are talking in front of an audience,

there's a need to perform and to showcase, like, your strength and also to protect your ego. And if you don't perform, quote unquote, in front of an audience, then you can become real people. Yeah, 100%. It is something if they've ever spoken. Like, they haven't spoken since. Not truly, because they did at their reunion in front of cameras. And it's like, that's not real. They haven't like, why didn't we say that?

They would just talk, it would be one thing. I think Nicole's hurt. I think Clay has his own feelings. And I just feel like if they just were to like pick up the phone, just figure it out. Yeah. What a hard concept. They weren't aired on the radio. No, they weren't aired on the radio.

But I think maybe because of that, because the audience didn't have like a button to end it, maybe they feel like they can't end it. They have to end it in front of an audience. Go get a drink and talk about it. Drink some wine. I feel that. Talk it out. Because you feel like you'd approve everything.

You feel like you have to almost prove yourself and prove your story. to everyone who has an opinion about your story, right? So, like, if there's things that you, maybe if you solve argument with someone and it's all figured out, then the audience has, that fans haven't seen you figure it, see, blah, ha, that, haven't seen you figure it out,

so you almost feel like you owe it to them. To them to, like, put this thing to bed. Yeah. And you will never win that game. No. Or maybe you just want attention, so you talk about it on social media. That too.

You know, but I was, I was in a, I was in a feud with Vanessa and it wasn't aired and but then it like kind of became when I was on next season and then it kind of became known as certain people from the season would talk about it but neither one of us ever went on social media and went at each other and actually she messaged me like after time had passed and I had done the Bachelorette she messaged me we got on the phone and we didn't even hash out we didn't even hash out what had happened because we're so many years past that we just picked up where we were and had a conversation about it and wished each other the best and we're totally friendly

and cool now and I mean like what a concept you know the different maturity level exactly yeah but time had to pass we had to separate it had to be the right time for us to be able to come to each other and work that out um I just thought about something okay so that I'm I'm switching I'm moving on from the unless anybody else wants to talk about a fine okay I just thought about something so one of the things I was told we get a lot of questions from people, you know, who watch the show and are super fans. And one of them is always, how do we know

each other? How do we all meet? Because we always say this Bachelor Nation world is small. And I remember, as I was going to be a contestant on next season, a producer saying to me, and maybe it was after I had film, be careful. People, past contestants will slide in your DMs

and talk to you. So if anybody's feeling a little frisky, I want to know, one, did pass contestants from the office of sex, slide in your DMs, and if so, who was it? Yeah. But I don't know if I was so far.

Yeah, that would be Katie. Katie, you're up. Katie, you're up. Who slid into those DMs? I mean, come on, it's fun. Oh, my God, I feel bad. You don't feel bad. They said, but they slid me.

Oh, no, it was just like really nice. I got 40, Alex. Alex, yes. He's great. Yeah. Yeah, he was so cool. But, yeah, he was like, hopefully I see you in paradise.

And I was like, yeah, same. I don't know you. All right. Anybody else? Any takers? Tasha. I don't think. I don't think.

I don't know what that was. I think at the time I was like, is he with Caroline? This is weird. Anyway. Okay, well, can you just say this? Do people slide in your DMs? Yeah. I'll slide right in, eh.

Well, Eric slid in your DMs about an event. But that's also how we meet a lot of these people, right? Yeah. That's how we met Tasia, right? Yeah. I'm really upset Nobody wanted to talk about who slid in my DMs

I'm trying to think I honestly don't remember they were contestants who didn't make it as far but I remember when it happened and I was like they were right it's almost as if they

Cam Well it's easier Because you said that in the mic Cam didn't slide it What happened was When Joe and I did Strayhand and Sarah And we were talking about ABC

Always Be Cam his thing I said ABC stood for another bad comb over. Remember that? Yeah, I remember that. And I went, ooh. So credit to Cam, he actually took that really well. And he wrote me and he said, you know, like, another bad comb over and like showed himself in front of the TV and laughed about it. And I was like, way to be a good sport and realized it's all in fun and it's nothing personal. So it wasn't like that. I think people are, at this point, people are afraid to slide in my DNA because they're afraid, not just because I'm married because I don't know. They think maybe I'll use it as content on

the podcast or something, like I just did. Sorry, Alex, Morty, I feel that. I think there is like you feel like you are connected to the people who are on previous seasons, and if you've gone through it and you see other people go through it, then you, I mean, there's a need or a want to, like, reach

out and to be like, it's going to be okay. So, yeah. It's easier to flirt. Okay, that's what it is. It's easier to flirt because, honestly, if you slide into somebody's DMs that's been on the same show as you, the odds are, they're probably going to back to you, opposed to if you just slide

on some random person's DMs. So that's really what it is. It's just an easier way to say hello. The ice is broken. Yeah, the ice is right. Exactly. I saw you kiss someone on TV. Yeah. On what you said, though, about

you know, you see these people coming to the show they, I guess, have had your experience. Do you feel that, because we're about to have a whole new crop of girls, so I'm talking to the ladies in the room right now, a whole new crop of girls come in with Peter's season. Do you feel like you need to reach out to them? No. I mean, no. I feel like I usually don't, I'm the kind of person that unless I meet you in person, I, it's hard for me to kind of like open up and to speak on messages and stuff like that.

And also I don't really look at the hidden DMs. Yeah. Yeah. Because, you know, and I wait to follow people until like I get to know them a little bit more. So in that regard, I don't feel like, I do feel like maybe some of the girls would reach out to people that they saw had similar circumstances, you know. Well, and the hidden DMs, there could be some business opportunities, by the way. I didn't look at my DMs for a year. I didn't even know they existed. I know. It took me a good one.

It took me a good one. It took me a while. And that's after the show. So I'm like, I probably missed that on a ton of opportunities because I didn't know about that. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. And I realize that later as well.

It's interesting. It's hard for me because when I, when I, when, contestants that are coming up do reach out it's it's weird it's like I want to give advice but at the same time I think and Joe and I talked about this on a previous episode people are so quick to throw the word friend around yeah it's like I get nervous it's like not saying we're best friends but you know I'm here to give you advice or reach out and then because if you don't people think you're not friend I don't know it's just it's like a weird place because this show's been on for 17 years and I imagine it's going to be on for at least another 17 years

So it's like, are you supposed to be best friends with every single person that comes on this show? There's no way you can be. Yeah. acquaintances maybe. Yeah, but I mean, if somebody on the show asks for your advice. I give it.

And you see it, yeah, same. A couple first-nighters ask for Joe's advice. Yeah, a few people do. I ask them that. How do I have your path? Yes, exactly. Ever going to happen again at a time. Phenomenal.

They only make one Joe. It's all I got to say. Honestly, stay out of my lane, right? I don't have to do it Let's just leave it at that Eric, I'll ask you this question Why do you think The Bachelorette seasons have been

More Successful than the Bachelor And even, I'll even throw, since we have Paradise at the table, why do you think The Paradise Relationships are successful? Because those have been just as, if not more. So when you say successful, you mean in the sense of couples staying together? Staying together, yeah.

They don't have to be married Because you guys are a strong couple. I've been watching No, no, no, the way he talked about you on the podcast, no, no, no, no, I know. Yeah, I had her listen to that too. Did you? A couple times.

I need to remind you. Did you hear that shit? Joe and I are too close. In a good way. Any argument, Joe just starts playing the podcast. Oh, he is so funny. Whenever Joe's on any sort of interview a podcast, he like, I'll see him like listening to it again

and then we'll listen to it and we'll listen to it a few times. It's cute. That's not true. I don't listen to all the podcasts. In the beginning. the beginning yeah in the beginning it was even worse because I used to give some bad interviews yeah well I think in general I love you too I think men in general we it takes us time to emotionally mature and some guys that get in that

space their life changes and you have all these opportunities and you have distractions and if you're not emotionally mature mentally mature and you don't understand life or relationships, you might not be in it for what it is because in the moment, let's be clear. We're in a fantasy world of dating on the show, even though we're in love or we're, but when you get outside of that, you've got to look at real life and what's real and what's not. Was this because I was in this state of love? This is why I fell in love?

Or is this something I really want? Because you don't know until you know. And I think most men were just not emotionally mature at what, 24. 25, 26, 28, maybe 32, 33, maybe some younger, depending on how they were raised. But it takes time. I got, you know, you guys, Brian and Rachel, like, I grew on the show. Like, I grew up my beard and everything.

My life changed, but I learned so much about myself and just opening up and being vulnerable. I think the date right before hometowns, I was so afraid to tell her where I grew up, I was like, she's not going to like, I was all in my head. And then she was like, oh, fine. I was like, wow. And so it's third.

those parts of a man and being vulnerable and opening up that we're insecure about because we don't know. And women like, just tell me everything. I get it, that's okay. And you're like, really? We are like that. And so men just need more time to develop, I believe. And when you put on a big stage like that, it's hard.

So to the guys that's, you know, the recent bachelor is about, you know, hopefully you guys, if you're still in relationship, you stay. But if not, you know, it's got work to do. And to the bachelor at being more successful. you were saying I think it's tough I think like kind of piggybacking

on what you were saying Eric is that people men come out of their shell and egos I think for men lower tremendously on the bachelorette because they're not guys are not used to having to like kind of fight for that attention they're like what bounce but on the bachelorette you're forced to do that

and I feel like girls in some sense kind of feel like they're in a constant state of that I don't know sometimes I feel like, and maybe not for every bachelor. Sometimes I feel like the bachelor gets a bigger ego because he's got all these girls chasing after him. They did. I feel like with a bachelorette, it's like such an opposite experience

because all these guys lower their egos and have to like put that completely aside and go for this woman and respect her and now be vulnerable. And they grow so tremendously. As for the girls, they're almost like, and not to say this was every bachelor, but almost like chasing someone who is,

their ego is growing. Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead, Joe. Well, I think for women, we talked about this before, but for women, they look at it like, I kind of lost my train of thought. Women are amazing, they're phenomenal, jokes. Women look at it like, can this work in the real world? Yeah. Where guys look at it like, who's the hottest?

Dog and heat. And that's just the truth. Like, you're like, who am I the most attracted to? And I think that's why the women of the show, the Bachelorette, seems to be more successful, in my opinion. I agree with you. Or let's, you know, correct me if I'm wrong, I don't want to, you know, if age is a factor having kids at a certain age, I feel like women have a timeline where I want to get married

by this time, I want to have kids, because if I don't have kids at before 35 or whatever, then I can't have them. I don't know. Men, we're like, I can get married at 35, 45, 40, so it's no rush to get into that. Yeah, women, we're fighting the clock right now. We're like, hey, we got to go, we got to go because it's going to be a year until marriage, And we've got to have a year of like the honeymoon phase. Then we got to have the baby.

And then we're like, clock's a ticking, man. If you could do this all over again, would you? No. I love these experiences. What do you mean? If you could do, like, yeah, if you could, from where you started on this bachelor journey, if you could go all over again or do it all over again, would you have done it? Would you audition?

Would you go through casting? Would you go on the show? Absolutely. 100% yeah I feel like you better say that right yeah I think it changed ever I mean I think for most people even if you are the villain on a season it changed your life for the better maybe you self-reflected in different ways you know I found a man so in that way and it also like I feel like a good man new amazing man I think it I think it allowed me to have more of a long-term relationship because I would usually end relationships around the eight to 10 month mark when and I would kind of give you a give up on relationships and not want to put a lot of work into it and with Joe it was such a different relationship because I was a different person and I think he grew in a lot of ways too because I'm like your first girlfriend pretty much in a lot of ways yeah so I mean you change you change oh yeah definitely changed I definitely grew up and also the one thing that I really

like about the show is I feel like everyone is afraid to say I want marriage I want something serious I want that and the show applauds that and celebrates people wanting commitment and wanting long-term relationships and in the real world you feel like if you want that it's too vulnerable or it ends up being like too much too soon and the show's like you should be in love the next day you know what I mean so you're not afraid to put yourself out there you almost feel like there's something wrong with you if you're not there right and I think like I don't know if we I can ask this question but asking Eric in the dating world now I am trying to imagine it because it must be, how do I say this?

It must be tough in the dating world because on the show, you're so likely to ask these hard questions. And I feel like whenever I would ask hard questions on like a second date scares people away. But those types of questions are like the questions were like, I don't know why you didn't ask that already on the show. So in the dating world now, do you find that you're now more readily available to open up?

I think for me, women are even shocked. They're intimidated because I, I'm so emotionally available and so available, just to listen, the talk. I'm like, I'll tell you whatever you want to know. Yeah. I'm spiritual. So since I've been young, it's always been, you're different. I'm like, okay.

What does that mean? You're different. So that's been a struggle, but I think most of them are not used to a emotionally available guy. Yeah. Who care about you, that thinks about you, that calls you, like, you okay, you need anything? Like, I'm on it. You're ready to have those conversations too. So it's, like, too much, too soon.

or like oh hold on pump the brakes brother yeah they're used to the person not checking on no no yeah motivating them in the morning not caring about i mean does that help you like weed them out because maybe they're just not ready for what you're ready for and you're looking for somebody that is well yeah but you could say next but i think also the challenge is if you do like someone like i was telling you off off mic that you know i fell hard for someone they just wasn't really ready but i was willing to you know pace it out and see what what i realize it's just not going to work right And so many girls think they're ready. And what they're ready for is a guy to text them back, not a guy to ask them the hard questions.

And that was the conversation. I said, do you really think you want to be in a relationship? And she was like, I really don't know when I think about it. And I said, that's okay. Because I felt you running. I can feel your energy. But I still care about you. I love you.

Like, it's okay. So we're still friends, but it's like I think Brian, you said off Mike when it's time is time. So for me, it's all about timing. And not forcing it. Yeah, and I think the show helped me. Yeah, absolutely. 100% To be open to that conversation or opportunity.

And there's times when I'm running as well. True doubt. So. But that's what makes you different though, quote unquote. Different. That's a good thing. Yeah, yeah, I know, but I'm just saying like it's been that since I was young. I wish more guys were like that.

So self-aware now. But I think they say that and then they get it. It's like, whoa. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 100%. You get that and you're like, whoa, you are everything I want, but I don't think I want that.

Right. it can be too much so it's just it's been different but it's been good I've learned a lot and sometimes in general people have all the checkboxes on paper and it's still not what you want and it's just because there's something that doesn't click and that's okay yeah I mean I I can speak on it you can't oh sorry go ahead no go ahead no I'm thinking well I think the reason why Joe's over here putting a head

forever band on his head I've been here for a while I'm a mature man that was actually so funny because I was watching him and he was like blowing bubbles I forgot what I was said Joe has a rubber band on his head

anyway I feel like there's the fear of putting too much and committing to someone that you feel like doesn't want those same things so I think the reason why it didn't work out for Joe and I

at least on the show, is because there was the fear that maybe it wouldn't be reciprocated, you know, in the same way. And I would say guys coming off the show, maybe you have a completely different experience than girls coming off the show. And so maybe for a guy, it's like, oh, I can, like, you know, go around, date and everything. And then for a girl, it's like, oh, man, like, I've just learned all this about myself and I want to put it into, like, one person. I'm not trying to generalize women and men, but it's a fear.

It's a fear to think, like, when you get off of this, and it's a female-based audience. So when girls come off, it's more so, like, celebrating relationships. When guys come off, it's like, oh, there's such a field of, like, options. And so that is also something that's contributed to different experiences. And I also think it's a fear to change your mind about how you feel. Yes. Because, like, we've done this for so long. How can you not be?

I'm like, I just don't feel that anymore. And I think people are afraid, and so people stay in it because it is comfortable and it is right. Why would I get out of it? Look at our life, but that's not always icing on a cake. It looks good, but it doesn't feel good. What's interesting, too, is that you can tell the difference of change in people from the people that left in the first three weeks and the people that stayed on after that. Yeah.

Or like the people that traveled together or whatever the case may be. at one point it's like a cutoff in the learning and how much people grew you can kind of see even in the conversations after the show I guess you'll talk to people from like week two or three and you're like whoa there's just a disconnect yeah yeah

speaking of the people in like week one two and three and you're talking about relationships with those people and beyond after the show do y'all conclude them in the group chat because there is the group chat the infamous group chat yeah we've stopped the group chat heard about your group chat.

I think there's some. We don't have a group chat. We stopped the group chat a long time ago. For Paradise? Oh, well, no. There was a Bachelor group chat too. I was in it and I was a week one guy. But I never participated.

I think there was a week one people. So there might still be a group chat. You're just not in it. Oh, no, I'm in it now. I have to be in it. Yeah, there was, I think it was selective kind of. With Bachelor, I actually asked, I didn't want to be on the group chat. So I didn't, I'm not in that.

But Paradise, I was in that one. it's just like too much sometimes you know yeah it is too much and it's usually the people except you joe it's usually the people who did not make it longer who are like clinging on to you know ready to what happened and i have a lot of opinions so you know we're all we all come from the same world and we talk about questions that people ask us and i know one of the questions i get all the time is what do you do in the mansion all day what do you do and i'm like we do interviews we eat we tan we lay out we work out like it's pretty much much like a eat, sleep, shit type thing, right?

Like, it's like everything that you do. But one of the things you do is play games. I don't know if you guys played games. We play drinking games, and those were some of the most wild nights, wild. But one of the games we would play is Never Have I Ever. So I want to play The Bachelor Edition, Never Have I Ever, with you guys. Everybody's played this game before, right? Yes.

So we all know the rules. I don't know the rules. Yeah, I don't know the rules either. Are we doing that? Oh, thank you, Joe. Thank you. Thank you. I'm going to ask a question.

Never have I ever, you know, had a threesome. Yeah. Okay. We played this on my season. I just realized that. Oh, so you just answered the truth. No. Did you play that?

Remember when we did the boat party in South Korea? In Hillman? Oh, yeah. If you have done the never have I ever, you have to take a sip of your drink. And you are empty, so you need to feel. fill up. Joe. So if you have done it, you drink. Joe. If you have. Got it. Okay. So we're going to get real close

and learn a lot about each other really quickly. So here we go. Oh, right in line. We've already talked about this. Never have I ever slid into another member of Bachelor Nation's DMs. In general, did you know them before? Because I've, DMTHA Katie, I feel like you're trying to rationalize

it, drink. And just for all of you out there, those who are drinking are Eric. Katie. Oh, Katie's drinking water. Brian, I'm looking at you real quick to make sure you're not drinking on this one. Never have I ever hit in the bathroom to avoid being filmed.

Really? Wow. Everybody drink except Eric. Look at you. What I'm hiding from? You'll love the camera. I'm here. We were all in the song.

What was y'all hiding from? I was tired of talking. Oh, yeah. Okay, never have I ever cried on camera. Everyone saw me with Wills. Take a sip, Katie. I didn't cry one song. Brian, you never cried on camera?

No. Oh, okay. I cried off. Everybody, so everybody took a sip except for Brian. I didn't take a sip yet. Wow, Brian's, oh, excuse me. And Joe. Whoa, what?

I don't know why, but I thought you cried in paradise for some reason with Kendall. Wrong guy. Maybe he wanted. I stepped away from the camera. Does that count? Really? You never cried on camera. I remember it was in Spain and we were doing B-roll and it was

down to the last two and just the thought of losing her or not having her moving forward I got a little teary-eyed and I just stepped away I was actually about to round a corner where they were going to be filming me and I was like give me two minutes which is actually because Brian is emotional so like and he's like very in touch of his emotion so I'm actually shocked you didn't cry on camera oh and I cried on camera my producer was crying so everybody was crying it was a crying party Good one. Never have I ever hooked up in paradise. Wait, let me read this.

Never have I ever hooked up in the paradise boom boom room. Katie's taking a sin. How do you think I got a fiance? No, I made it, I, Joe and I made it a point not to go in the boom boom room. Maybe it was more so my decision not to go in the room. Yeah, Joe's like, speak for yourself. Well, yeah, I was like, I'm not going to pressure you, but if you want to, I'm not going to. I just felt, I'm not going to say.

First of all, I knew that if I was alone in a room with Joe, it was going down, and I did not want it to be where cameras were present. But are cameras in the boom-boos? Yes. Oh, yeah. So I just didn't trust myself. Alone with Joe. But they don't air that.

Like, I don't ever remember. They show, like, sheets and stuff, like, rustling. Did they air with you? What's going on down there? No, no, they aired me crying by myself in that bed. Yeah. No, they aired other people on our, on our side. season.

Yeah, well, that was an intense boom-bo-room situation. What happened? No, they had a lot of passion for each other. Yeah, there was a couple of shots. Yeah, it was cute. It was cute. I mean, you feel, I mean, you're dating for a while and you have, like, that sexual tension building up, and I believe me, I wanted to.

I definitely wanted to go with Joe, but I think I was just so worried about there being video evidence. I don't blame you. I started worrying about it after it already happened and I was like, well, well, well. Yeah, I mean, just in my head. Okay. Wait, Eric, Tasha, no boom boom, boom. Y'all never went in the boom boom room?

Or you just want to be quiet? No. Who I'm on the boom room? You are not a good liar. You are not a good liar. I mean, she's kind of fell for so on. I don't. You were, that doesn't mean, that you have to be in a relationship to go boom, boom. I mean, how are she going to boom boom, You do? Oh, I thought, I mean, I've never been to paradise.

I just assume everybody's wild and fris-I-on-the-beach. No. Technically be like, it's hot. Well, I've never, you had boom-am room. One of them was air-conditioned and I was like, yeah, got to go in there. Yeah. Yeah. When you get air conditioning, something happens.

Mm-hmm. Your mind and body things change. You're like, we're, this is life now. Wow. Amazing. Okay, never have I ever had to go to the hospital while filming. It's none of us, right? Oh, yes. Yeah.

Oh, I don't know if that'll happen again. Nice. Okay, never have I ever been in a hot tub in an obscure location. Oh, well. Wait. What do they mean about that? Oh, fuck. Oh, I have never.

I never have I done that either. I was like in a hallway and it was like a random hot tub. Pretty much, did everybody drink on that? Not Joe. Not Joe. It's going to be the whole thing. Everybody, not Joe. Group day rose.

Okay, never have I ever won a group date row. I've never won a group date. I've never won a group date rose. Take a drink, Katie Kendall. Well, no. Oh wait, oh wait, no. Because we really never heard. Oh, gosh, I keep drinking.

Oh, wait a minute, actually. If it's three and one, it's a group. You know, three and one counts, that's a group. It's totally a group. Is what? Yeah. That counts. It's a group before.

Okay. I'll take it. I'm going to skip around here. I'm going to skip around. Um, never have I ever kissed. have I ever kissed a celebrity. Well, Joe's a celebrity, son.

It's true. No, that bastard people don't count. Never have I ever kissed a celebrity. What's considered a celebrity? What is considered a celebrity? Like an age? Like, is it like a Instagram celebrity? Instagram celebrities don't count.

So an actual like an actor, actress who's popular. Yeah, somebody who's no. Or a musician. Okay. Wow. Who is it, Rachel? Still. I was going to say something and then I was like wait that's not don't worry it's not

anything you don't know Brian look at him he's like Rachel anybody else okay um never have I ever done it in a public place what's public oh is everybody drinking come on I know where I know we're all like A sip, right? Of course. Everybody took a slip, right? You have to take a risk. Never have I ever skinny dipped.

I have never. Oh, I'm sure when I was younger. We should go skinny-divism. I'm sure when I was younger. Joe goes, I'm sure when I was younger. Seven-year-old Joe just jumped in a pool. I'm not naked and just jumped in the water. You crazy kid, you Joe.

I'm sure like a summer in high school or something. Um, okay. Oh, this is a good one. never have I ever dined and dashed. Oh, never. Oh, my God, I was in the service industry. Where you eat, where you eat, where you eat and don't pay just run out of the restaurant. Joe, I've been so soon.

Joe, Joe, Joe, Drew. I grew up in Chicago. What is that? Where was it? Hold on. What restaurant? We did it at, we're, I think steak and shakes. Steak and shake.

Okay, okay, late nights, 4 a. I mean, it was a chain. It was corporate, so. Was it for kicks? Joe's trying to punish them Against the man Yeah I mean you know you were a kid It was like 6th 7th grade

And so like it was just for fun Yeah I was like let's get out of here Let's scram They come chasing after you Did they realize? Yeah but they can't catch you Have you ever? They don't do anything more

As you ran away I feel like I'm not condone Dyn and Dash on this podcast Yeah I mean you're talking about like 10 year olds Like I don't do that anymore Have you been back there since? I've actually, I spent way too much money on for me, to be honest with you. If you actually looked, I looked at my American Express card, what I spent this year and I'm sick.

No, I'm not going to. But, I mean, the restaurants, I made it up to them, trust me. Okay, here, this is, this is the last one, so this is a good one. Never have I ever had a one night stand. The only sex I knew for a while. And those that would be drinking are, The show, Eric, all the guys, Brian, Rachel, Katie. I'm a serial monogamous.

We are done with the game playing portion of the show. So can everybody put on their headphones? We have a special person joining us on the podcast for our Friendsgiving. Everybody have their headphones on? Yes. Hello? Hello, hello. Oh my God, is that Peter the Bachelor?

What's that Peter? What's going on, guys? What's up? Peter. We appreciate you joining our first. Friendsgiving. Thank you guys for having me. Nobody knew you were coming on.

This is a surprise. Has anybody in the room met Peter? Yes. I have. Yeah, okay, so Tasha's here. Okay, so you've got Rachel, my husband, Brian, Joe, grocery store Joe. What's up? Kendall, Eric, Tasia, and Katie.

Okay, yeah, very cool. How are you guys doing? Good, good. How are you doing? How are you doing? I am definitely enjoying life right now. It's pretty good. It's quite the journey so far.

Peter, you sound in love, if I must say. Yes. Happy enough. Is that so? I mean, there is love in this room, but I'm telling you, you really sound happy. I've been trying my absolute best to stay so open, not get to, you know, too, too invested in just one relationship and then close myself off a little too early. I remember talking about your season when we said, I was like, he's probably going to fall in love with five women. He's just such a lover.

Like, it's just definitely going to get something out of him this season. And I know it's going to be a happy ending. So we're excited for you. Since we are doing Friendsgiving in the spirit of Thanksgiving, what are you most grateful for so far as The Bachelor? I mean, I'm just, just for this entire experience, I've been feeling just so grateful for the last couple months that for whatever reason, you know, I was chosen to have this amazing, you know, experience and opportunity to go find love in such a fun way, a once in a lifetime, you know, type of way. I feel so grateful for honestly, all the women that I've been able to meet on this journey. And literally, like,

you guys are going to see such an amazing group. I can just tell, like, for the most part, they're just all here, you know, for me and really giving this a shot. And I've just been so thankful for that. I will tell you from one lead to another, while you have a phone in your hand, run, Google something, take it away. I'm going to let you go right now. Thank you, Peter so much. All right, I'm on it. All right, bye, Peter.

Thanks so much. See you. Oh, you guys. How happy to Peter sounds. Who's mad him? You met him? Tasha's met him. Yeah, we met him.

Eric's met him. Paradise Reunion. Oh, that's right. Yeah. I met him like at Demies. I did. Paradise Reunion? I was like in the back.

Oh, yeah. He reminds me of Ben 100% I've seen pictures of him and he's in this sweater and I'm like, that is so did Ben Higgins have that sweater? Did he pass it down?

Is it like a good luck sweater? He totally looks like him. Yeah, he looks like him, he acts like him, he sounds like him. I felt like I was talking to him. I'm excited that it'll be this actually Ben Higgins is like secretly playing Peter.

I'm excited that it'll be a season where we, like I know he's going to get engaged. And so I'm excited that, like, that's what we're going to get to see at the end of this. Because it's, you know, we need a happy ending in the Bachelor franchise.

Exactly. There's been a lot of crazy endings recently. We're going to wrap this up. Before we let you go, I just want to ask everyone at the table, what is the one thing that you are most grateful for coming out of the Bachelor franchise? I'll start.

My lovely girlfriend. Oh. And my dance moves. Yes, I am also thankful for those dance moves. I would have to say I am most thankful for the ability to have a second chance with my relationship with Joe because there was a time when it was maybe not going to happen. And I feel like I would have been making an incredible mistake. Bad movie, drastic.

But, no, now, knowing where we are now, I'm so happy that I'm able to have the experience of our relationship and to celebrate that. I would say just perspective on relationships and dating and all the relationships built throughout this franchise, producers, castmates, and people at this table. I'm grateful for you guys, so thank you. I agree. I have to say the people. I mean, I probably would not have met any of you guys otherwise, and a lot of the friendships that I've built, there are friendships that I put effort into every day. I still talk to a lot of the girls, and I feel like I've grown so much because of the friendships. made so I'm really grateful for the people I've met yeah um I would say the people I've met and my like

learning about myself um I'm really thankful because I feel that I thought I was already self-aware and it putting the camera on you like you really learn to look inward and recognize where your faults are too and so just being able to do that and even find empathy with others has been something I've been really grateful for. Yeah, it's so hard to put it to one thing. Like, I truly am grateful for the entire experience because it's changed my life completely. Like, my life is a complete 180 in every single way. And coming into the show and being so skeptical to coming out of it with a marriage

is, it's still insane to me. So I'm just so grateful that I did it. I was open to it. And I'm just thankful for everything that it's brought me. Brian. Yeah, I think the people, not only on the show, but, you know, the people that this show has been able to put me in front of after the show, I think has been really great. The experience, of course, and the personal growth, I would say, I think everybody can relate to that. Just the personal growth, all the positive that comes from this.

And, of course, my lovely wife, so, yeah. Sorry, I didn't mention my fiancé, also grateful for you, Chris. I took to what you were saying, you were talking about him. Yeah, okay. But yes, give him that shout out for sure. And Bogowski. You guys, this has been so much fun. Thank you so much for being a part of the first ever Bachelor Happy Hour, Friendsgiving.

Could not have done this without you. And I'm so glad that we're in great places. Like, just going around the room and hearing the growth that every, has experienced because of this crazy bachelor experience you know you call it crazy but it is really a grow a growing and learning process so anyways everybody seems to be in such a great place we have to cheers to that right drink all our champagne as we used to say cheers to love but just cheers to life I was just about to say that cheers to life you guys

cheers oh happy Thanksgiving y'all happy Thanksgiving thank you all for our friends for coming on bachelor happy hour to do our first ever, Friendsgiving. Thank you for helping Brian and I host it today. And hopefully we can make this an annual thing. Love to have you back. Don't think just because you did one. You're done. You can come back, okay? And next week, we will be talking to Ari and Lauren. Can't wait to catch up with them and see how life is with Little Alessie. So tune in next week to Bachelor Happy Hour. In the meantime, you can get all the latest Bachelor Nation news on bachelornation.com right now. And if you have something that you want to tell us, good, bad, whatever, we're open to constructive

criticism. You can email us at happy hour at bachelornation.com or visit bachelornation.com and click podcast. Thank you so much, guys, for listening. I'm Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, host of the psychology podcast. Here's a clip from an upcoming conversation about how to be a better you. When you think about emotion regulation, we're not going to choose an adaptive strategy which is more effortful to use unless you think there's a good outcome. Avoidance is easier. Ignoring is easier. Denials is easier. Denials your complex problem solving takes effort listen to the psychology podcast on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts hi my name is enya umanzor and i'm drew phillips and we run a

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