Bachelor Happy Hour - He Said WHAT?! | Golden Hour

Episode Date: December 3, 2025

Today, we’re diving into all things finances and parenting! You’ve sent us so many questions about money, relationships, and raising kids, so we’re giving you a crash course on all of it. Kathy and Susan have had quite the journey when it comes to dating and making major life decisions with men, you won’t believe some of the things they’ve had to navigate. They’ve learned a lot along the way, and today they’re sharing those lessons with you.We kick things off with the holidays and reminisce about those early years of celebrating with young children, then, we get into the big stuff: money. What does talking about finances look like in a relationship? What should you know before getting married? We’re covering the essentials. And, of course, we wrap up with parenting advice — from parenting teens to bringing home a newborn and what comes next, we're here to get into it all! Tune in now for all this and more and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Can we get a Thanksgiving first? I'm hungry. What's up, y'all? It's Kadeen. And DeVal, the host of the Ellis Ever After podcast. This holiday season, tune out the noise and tune in to Ellis Ever After. On Ellis Ever After, we get real with our crew about family, love and marriage,

and everything else in between. Listen to Ellis Ever After on America's number one. Podcast Network, IHeart. Follow Elizabeth Rafter and start listening on the free IHeart Radio app today. I'm Robert Smith, and this is Jacob Goldstein, and we used to host a show called Planet Money. And now we're back making this new podcast called Business History about the best ideas and people and businesses in history. And some of the worst people, horrible ideas and destructive companies in the history of business. First episode, how Southwest Airlines use cheap seats and free whiskey to fight its way into the airline is.

Most Texas story ever. Listen to business history on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Thanksgiving isn't just about food. It's a day for us to show up for one another. It's okay not to be okay sometimes and be able to build strength and love within each other. I'm Eli Akani, host of the podcast Family Therapy, a series where real families come together to heal and find hope. I've always wanted us to have therapy, so this is such a beautiful opportunity. Listen to Season 2 of Family Therapy every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network,

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. Thanks for joining us today. We are so excited to be back. How are you doing today, Susan? I am here. I am happy still. I mean, I'm getting a little crazy with the holiday sneaking up.

I'm Mrs. Claus. Are you organized? Yeah, I'm going to say for me, I'm really organized. I've got most of my Christmas shopping done. Done? Yes. Yeah, because you bought your son floors for his house. I mean, that's a no-brainer.

You don't have to wrap it. You didn't have to go look for it. They look mighty nice, I might add. I bet they all. No, let me just say to you, when you have older children, Like we all do, it's easy because you know what they love that five-letter word, money. Money. Or four-letter word cash. They love it. But I always try to get something. I can't say my surprises because, you know, God forbid my kids, listen to this. But I've got a couple of good surprises

for my kids. Grandkids, I don't know about you, but I ask my children. Oh. They send me lists, the older grandkids, me this, this, this. I meant for the younger ones. Oh, they're so cute. That's my problem. I can't stop buying for the little ones. Oh, see, I've got piles like this. Oh, they don't ask. So my kids tell me what their kids want.

And so. What they need, yeah. What they need, what they want. And that's what I do. Well, the baby's too small. Your two and a half year old is not going to know. Do you remember looking through like the Sears catalog or the Toys R Us pamphlets and they would circle what they wanted? Yes.

I know. My seven-year-old, though, she's definitely old enough. And I asked her the other day, I said, Linley, what do you want for Christmas? And actually, I loved her answer. She goes, I don't know, Kiki. I don't need anything. And I just thought, oh, my God, you're going to get the world from me.

I mean, I loved that answer. She's just, for me, it's time spent. I'm taking Lindley with my daughter-in-law to see the Nutcracker this year. That, my grandmother used to take me. me and we're going to go out for dinner afterwards. You know, she might fall asleep watching it, but that I much prefer to give my grandkids and frankly my children too, memories, experiences, because that's what they're going to remember. That's what's going to change how they grow, how they think.

And so I prefer to do that. And making traditions, if you will, that's something that you do special. We go looking at Christmas lights every year. It's like a whole night out with the hot chocolate. A whole bit, you freeze your ass off. Not in Texas, honey. You're wearing shorts and a t-shirts. Can I just say, just for laughs and giggles,

what's the temperature where you are today? The high. It's chilly today. It's probably in the 50s. Okay, the high is going to be in the 50s? Yeah. Our high today is going to be 85. Of course it is.

I remember living in Texas. I know. It's crazy. All right. We are going to dive in today. We're doing a whole other kind of topic today. Yes, and we're so excited to talk to all of you about it. Okay, so today, today, we're going to start off talking about all things, finances, or finances, depending on how you pronounce it.

Oh, boy, I mean, I don't even know what to say because everyone says that what breaks up marriage is the most difficult topic is money and children. Money can't buy happiness. Yeah, all those things. You know, you've got to get on the same page. So what does, go ahead. I was going to say to you, what does talking about finances look like in a relationship and what questions should you be asking at all stages of relationships or marriage? So again, it's very different.

When I got married, I couldn't wait to open a joint checking account and savings account. No, seriously, I paid all the bills. We combined, you know, he had 10 cents and I had a nickel, and we combined that when we got married. Today's young couples, I don't know. I know my kids do it differently. Some of them have their own accounts. Some of them join for, you know, join their accounts. What's right?

It's what works for the couple. I think when you're younger, again, you're saving for homes. You're saving for vacations. you're saving for kids college education so all of those conversations have to be had at our age it's a whole different conversation totally different story but what it's a question would you be asking well i how do you want to do the money right do you want to make us a private account a joint account yet we each have our own and we both put in x amount of dollars into that account to pay the bills, the mortgage, that da-da-da-da-da.

So what I'd like or what I do, what I would like is the man to say, Kathy, you keep all your money to give to your children. We don't need it. I'll take care of you. I dream about that. But in reality, I think I like your idea, which is combining money for utilities, for trips, for everything. Let's talk about Golden's only since that's who we are.

getting into a relationship. Now there are questions. Okay. What's your first question? I'm asking you because you're the finance girl here. You did it way smarter than I did. I wish I paid more attention. Well, wait, let me just say, I had a husband out on Harvard MBA. That helps. Okay. I learned from a master. But let me say the first, again, if I'm in a relationship, not dating, But if I'm in a relationship with someone and we're talking about a future, about moving in together or perhaps getting married. Or monogamous relationship where we spend five days and we together, whatever it is. I don't care we maintain our own homes.

I'm saying if I am in that serious of a committed relationship, the first question I'm going to ask is how are we going to manage our financial? going forward. Are we going to live separate but equal lives? Are you going, you know, those are the questions I want the, that is the question I want the answer to, because I'm not to contribute to his home, if you will, if it's not my home. Does that make sense? If you're living in it, even? Not if he owns it. No, no. I mean, at this stage of the game, you would think that the home is paid off. I know many people

have mortgage. Mortgage is not because they need to, but because it's a financial decision for tax purposes or whatever. My point, and you know this story too. I dated a guy, believe or not, it's the same guy with the dog who, this was

doomed from the beginning. But very nice, generous guy. And then we had talked about me moving in, and we talked about what I would pay for and what he would pay for. And he said, I want to do some revisions, some remodeling to the house, like make the closet bigger, change the flooring, just, and I said, you know, I'll pay for that because I'm going

to be enjoying it and you own the home. And he said, that seemed fair. And about a month later, we're talking about, are we ever going to move in, you know, what are we going to do kind of thing. And he said, well, you know, I think you should pay the money. real estate taxes on the house because you're living here for free. Yeah, the face you just made was the face I made. I said, I don't own this home. You're getting the appreciation of the improvements I'm making on the home and I don't own a home anymore. Really? And then if we're going down

this road, the absolute last dagger to the heart was when he said, oh, by the way, if something happens to me, to him, you need to move out right away because the house will be going immediately to my daughter. I was like, we are so done. Yeah, wait, let me pay the taxes, they have the utilities, and then if you drop dead, I'm done. I'm homeless. But even though you and are cutting up about this, these are the questions that people, I think, sometimes at our age, jump in too quickly because they say the kids are gone, you know, we're retired. We just move in together. Well, guess what? When you move in with someone at any age, you have to have the conversations about who's going to pay for what? How are you going to divide the utilities? All those

things. When I had lived with a gentleman for just one year, and I had said that on the way in, what do you expect of me? I mean, how can we do this? It's his home. And he said, no, I don't want a penny from you. You could buy food. You could do things. So I ended up buying a stove. I bought a refrigerator. I did the food shopping and I started to add it in my head thinking it might be cheaper for me to go and get a new condo. That was before I decided to come back to the house that I owned, but I had somebody living in it at the time. But you're right, it's very important. And when he said that, I thought, oh good, I could save some money. And I did. I mean, but you know, refrigerators almost three grand. Like, okay, how much

rent is that a month and a half, but you know what I'm saying? No, I know exactly what you're saying, and that's why people say conversations about money are ugly. That may well be. It's uncomfortable, I think. It may be uncomfortable, it may be ugly, but they are conversations that

have to be had if you're going to have a good, healthy relationship at any age. Absolutely. Unless he's, you know, Rockefeller and doesn't care, then you don't think, okay, no problem. Well, that's back to guy that I was hoping would say. I'm Stefan Curry

and this is Gentleman's Cut. I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit gentlemen's cutbuburn.com or your nearest total wines or Bevmo.

This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon. please visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com. Please enjoy responsibly. On the latest episode of next question with me, Katie Couric,

my guest, Senator John Federman of Pennsylvania opens up about his 22 stroke, his battle with depression, and his remarkable recovery. Stay in the game and keep it as simple as you can because the lie of depression is that the best solution is to take yourself out. And that is the awful choice you can't.

ever come back from. But since there's no such thing as a slow newsday, we also talked about the end of the government shutdown, a resolution he helped facilitate, and one that has elicited a lot of anger from his constituents. To put 42 million Americans at food insecurity and not pay our military, that is absolutely the wrong approach to fight for health insurance. Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You know the shade is always Shadiest right here.

Season 6 of the podcast Reasonably Shady with Giselle Bryan and Robin Dixon is here dropping every Monday. As two of the founding members of the Real Housewives Potomac were giving you all the laughs, drama, and reality news you can handle. And you know we don't hold back. So come be reasonable or shady with us each and every Monday. I was going through a walk in my neighborhood. Out of the blue, I see this huge sign next to somebody's house. The sign says, my neighbor is a Karen. Oh, no way.

I died laughing. I'm like, I have to know. You are lying. Humongous, y'all. They had some time on their hands. Listen to Reasonably Shady from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Lama is a spirit.

It's not just a city. I didn't really have an interest of being on air. I kind of was up there to just try and infiltrate the building. It's where Crunk was born in a club in the West End. Four World Star, it was 559. Where a tiny bar birthed a generation of rap stars. where preachers go viral and students at the HBCU

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They want to look in the eye. Where the future is nostalgia. Talk to the chat, GPT. She's like, you really did first lady to have a gayfew girl's tape in Atlanta, Georgia. Like, that's what separates you from a lot of people. And I'm like, oh what?

You're right. Atlanta doesn't wait for it. permission, it builds its own spotlight. Um, Big Rube, let us guide you through the stories behind Atlanta's most iconic moments. Listen to Atlanta is on the I-Hard Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Jingle bells, jingle, jingle all the way. Yo, yo, yo, can we get Thanksgiving first? I'm hungry.

Hey, y'all, it's Kadeen. And Deval. The hosts of Ellis Ever After podcast. This holiday season, whether you're cooking for the family, out buying gifts for the kids or crowded in holiday traffic tune out the noise and tune in to Ellis Ever After on Ellis Ever After we get rid with our crew about family if you feeling like you feeling that's probably because you're a good parent friendship be careful what you put in your body move your body and love it the way you love them cars that house them clothes and clothes

them shoes them brunches love yourself them brunches love in marriage you know what's become attractive to me and it's because I've self-corrected and I guess I detoxified myself, accountability. It has become so attractive so attractive to me and everything else in between. I've told my most embarrassing moment on this podcast before, which was me taking

a shit in a zip lock bag. So listen to Ellis Ever After on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. All right. one for you. What does the jump to a second career look like? And what does it take to stick the landing, if you will? What happens if, let's see, I'm past that too. Like, this is a second career. Right. Maybe my third. I don't know. I've done a lot. Yeah. I think for you and me,

and we've talked about this, when you and I went on the Golden Bachelor, we went on, we went on to find love. You and I didn't know what an influencer was. We were clueless about anything else. We didn't know what a brand deal was. We went on to find love. You and I found each other and some other great girlfriends. We did not find romantic love. Having said that, I would say the answer to this question is luck. You and I have been very lucky. And I am so grateful that you and I have this podcast and we get to talk to people and we get to go to events and meet people and see, hear them talk about us changing their lives and how happy they are. All of that. But I think what it takes to stick the landing. What if it was your spouse or your boyfriend or your living, whoever you want

to be, he was changing careers. It's, it's, again, it's a conversation. Here's the bigger question for me. I do, and I've said this out loud, I do not want to date a man who is working full time. Not now. Not in my golden years. So many people have second careers. You and I do right now. But that's not the issue. It's how do you stick it? How do you stay with it? It takes a lot of planning, a lot of thought. If you're with a partner, it takes a lot of consideration of what their needs are. With our Cs, communicate, talk about it. And it's not always going to work out exactly like you thought or how you talked about it. Right.

But at least the conversation happens. But I think that more and more people, you know, 70s, the new 50, all of that, people are not retiring at 60, 62, 65. They're working in careers or starting new careers, which I think is great. Right. That's great. But for me, if the guy is going to put the career ahead of our relationship, that's not going to work for me. It's not. I want a man who can give me the time and attention that I want and I want to be able to give him the time and attention.

So if he'd rather be at the stage, so that's what you want. That's what it's about. Right. Well, but I'm saying if someone that you and I are in a relationship with, if they tell you I'm starting a new restaurant or I'm starting to new, whatever it is, what picks something. That's a big one, for instance, a restaurant, they're never home. Either you've got to go in with him and be a part of that because you don't have a private life anymore. Yeah, but here's the thing. A lot of, and I've known people my age who start in a relationship with someone who's retired

and then the person changes their mind, one or the other changes their mind. And that is a complete lifestyle change. So you have to be really aware of what it is you want. And again, I'm sounding like beating a dead horse here. But at our age, we have lived enough life that we know some of the pitfalls in a second or third, this end of life relationship. Are we willing to deal with this? You know, because you know what could happen.

Like, oh, gosh, do I even want to go there? And once again, having that conversation and being honest with your partner saying, I don't know if I could do it. So let me ask you, I was asked this on another podcast I was on, would you support your partner financially? If I financially had enough for both of us plus my children, yes, depending on what he was doing too. If he was like to stay-at-home dads, I know people. No, no, no, at our age, not stay-at-home dad, at our age.

To take from my kids to a certain degree, I wouldn't just carry somebody now. Yeah, see, when I was asked, it was an emphatic no. And they asked me why. And I said because I worked very hard raising my family, my husband worked very hard outside of the home, earning that money. And my money is going to my children. And if he doesn't have the money,

it typically means we're not going to have similar lifestyles. So for me, you know, that's probably not going to work. But I think it's, do you think it's important at this age to date someone that's in your same ballpark yes and that's something i never even bothered to notice yeah you know because i i wasn't going on an interview when i start dating somebody what do you have for retirement you know but when do you ask that question you start learning that as you go into the first year and you start learning things and then you go oh god you know and i would have a conversation about it it might not end well yeah that conversation because

because they might feel a certain way. I don't know. But how do your finances change after you get married? Well, again, it depends whether you're... Younger. At the top of the hour, we talked about that. If you're going to combine your total wealth, which I never will do,

I'm not sure young couples do that much anymore. I think when we were younger, we did. But I think that... To me, it was exciting. when you got married young and we put both our money together. We had so much more. Well, we didn't, but I mean, I put my husband, listen, I worked a full-time job, 35 hours a week and went to school, university, because I finished college after I was married.

I took 15 hours and worked a 35-hour-a-week job while my husband was in grad school. Literally, I went to work. I worked three and a half days a week, got the 35 hours in, and planned my course load around that. And so I would come home. We would eat dinner. We would both go in the other room that had two desks, and we would sit and study for four hours, go to bed, get up and do it all over again. That was smart. So I have to say, I don't have a lot of sympathy.

But you paid your dues. You paid your dues. When I was a lot younger. But now, I don't know, does that make me sound hard, Susan, because I don't want to date someone. And let me finish before you answer. I don't want to date to someone who is not in my financial realm in the similar situation because I think for me that bleeds over into other areas of our life, our values. I don't know.

Do you agree with that or not? I don't know if it's just the values, but I understand because if you have more, would they expect you to carry things or something like this? Yeah. Or being used for your money or, you know, it could be any of these things. And that happens. But I think it's difficult to meet somebody and decide whether enough he does have it or not. Is he prepared for retirement or not without a conversation?

But then you're not going to have a conversation until you're past the fifth thing. and you slept together. Well, another reason to not sleep with them until, you know, a month of Sundays have gone by. But I find it hard because I always let my heart lead. I swear to God, I'm going to beat that out of you. I'm so going to beat that out of you. Maybe in my next life, Kathy, I don't know. No, in the next life, I would have seen you coming.

I'm going to turn around and go the other way. But, you know, when you do have the conversation and then you feel like you're getting ugly, like when money comes into it. And I've experienced this and mentioned some things like your work ethics aren't up to par for me. Like, shouldn't you be hustling right now? Susan, but wait, for everyone who's listening, Susan's idea of hustling is like Susan's idea of a house being clean. You can eat off the floors. Her idea of hustling is working five jobs and getting two hours of sleep.

Because that's who I am. I not understand. But that's exactly my point. Is that your expectation that someone. else have that same work out there. I think it is. If I want something, I'm going to work even harder because I want to get it. I spoil myself, so I'm going to work for it. Now, I don't expect anybody else to buy it for me. Whereas people that don't work as hard and don't have as much of an income and their lifestyle is different than Mayan, they're, you know, and that works for

them but when the two of you meet that becomes a little bit i don't want to call it an issue or a problem but it's a concern yeah well you know this guy that i uh who shall go nameless we call call him east coast guy um he was a very wealthy man and you remember me telling you that was a bit of a concern for me because well you said you didn't need any of his money i well not only that men that are really wealthy, real power, I think, sometimes with their money. And I didn't want to be caught under that, you know, I didn't want to feel like he would spoil me with anything and give me, but with that, you would have to do what he wants. Right. Yeah. And I, and I, and I want to, at this age, I want a partnership. I don't want to walk ahead of someone. I don't want to walk

behind someone. I want to walk with them. And I make jokes. But when I say, you know, when, if we go to Europe on a trip. I want us both to be able to fly business class. You know, I'll pay for my ticket. That's expensive. I know, but I just looked into it for Bella and I and I go, I could do one, but I can't leave her in the back of the plane. Yeah, well, you could actually. She's 13. I would

never do that. Would you do that? Taking your granddaughter for powers. Okay, I was going to say, now we're going to talk you and I. No, I would not. I would rob the bank and fly us both business class. But I'm just saying, I think that to sum this topic up, I think finances or finances look very different when you're young and when you're golden. But you know what?

The issues around finances are huge, whether it is our age or a 30-something. The issue is real, and you better figure out how you're going to manage your finances because it is a real problem that can develop in a marriage or a relationship. I know my son and daughter-in-law came into some money for a legal matter, and I don't want to overstep, but I became actually annoying to my son because I keep telling them, I hope, Christopher, you put some money away to invest. You are fortunate that this happened. They're living grand.

they redid their house and I see thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars and they're so happy and I get it but make sure because when it's going it's gone so are they saving some have you condemned them you know mom don't worry about it I got something put away but when I heard the amount compared to what they have yeah I was not thrilled and I had a step back it's his life it's it's his life and her life you know speaking of our children's lives we've done some talk about parenting, but let's, you just, you, you touching on the question, I, it's a great segue. Okay. How do your responsibilities obligations to your child change or children as they get older, exactly what you just said. When your son, if he'd gotten that money was younger,

hey, sunny boy, you know, a 10th is going to the church, you're going to go, it's going to go in the bank, you can have 10 cents to spend. I'll give you a thousand dollars, go buy yourself something, of the rest of history. Exactly. So, so it, it does totally change as our children get older. And our obligations, we don't have as many obligations. However, when they're both working hard and this has happened too, oh my God, Mom, I just can't take it anymore. I can't catch a break. My refrigerator just went or my washer and dryer. I'm in the position where, no, don't worry about it. So you and I have both. done that. We've both helped our kids. But not all parents can. But that's not an obligation

to help our children. I think that is the difference. We have the resources that we can help our children, but we are not responsible for them. We are not obligated to help them. My, my, one of my sons, you don't, you know, you think we are obligated. I don't think I'm responsible, but I feel obligated to help my children because I can. And if they have something happen, although I have lent money to my kids and said, you have to pay it back. Have they?

Yes. They didn't used to. But yes, they have. I have not lent my children money. I think that as I look back on my own life, I think sometimes we are handicapping our children when we do too much for them. We are.

Our children, you know, can, in my case, I have a child who could work more hours during the day to earn more money. And the other day, we had this phone conversation, and I can't, it was one of those, I can't cut a break deals. Can't catch a break. Can't catch a break. You know, tires went out on the car and then came downstairs and there was a hole in the windshield on the car and had, you know, a $500 deductible. And what I heard out of the mouth of this child. child was of my child, I can't believe all the bad things that are happening to me. And I said, no, actually, this is called life. Everyone has, it's called saving for a rainy day. It's called

this is what happens on the way to retirement. Life happens. And you have to save for those rainy days. You have to save for the tires that go out, the air conditioner that blows. I mean, so many different things, expenses. Did you ever get the text in all caps? F.M.L. Yes. I looked at that. I didn't know what it meant. I do. And when I finally realized, well, my daughter frequents that message. I go, what happened now? Again, I, you know, everyone has to do for their children. And in retrospect, you know, anyone who's interested in Kathy's opinion, I think it's very difficult. It was for me to sit back and watch my children suffer by not being able to make ends meet and having to find another way

or do without to make ends meet. Say this again. I'll ask you. I'm saying that as a parent, do as I say, not as I did. I sat back and helped my children more than perhaps I should have. Letting your children suffer a little bit, the consequences. of their actions. Letting them figure a way out of the corner that they've backed their way into is a great learning and maturing event for them. And I don't want to rob my kids of that

because that's what makes them strong, intelligent, successful adults. You know, it's not, Susan, our successes that define us. It is our failures that define us and make us stronger, better humans. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is Gentleman's Cut. I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest total wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older.

Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit Gentleman's Cut Bourbon.com. Please enjoy responsibly. On the latest episode of Next Question with me, Katie Couric, my guest, Senator John Federman of Pennsylvania, opens up about his 22 stroke, his battle with depression, and his remarkable recovery. Stay in the game and keep it as simple as you can

because the lie of depression is that the best solution is to take yourself out. And that is the awful choice you can't ever come back from. But since there's no problem, No such thing is a slow news day. We also talked about the end of the government shutdown, a resolution he helped facilitate and one that has elicited a lot of anger from his constituents. To put 42 million Americans at food insecurity and not pay our military, that is absolutely the wrong approach to fight for health insurance.

Listen to next question with me, Katie Couric on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jingle bells, jingle all the way Yo, yo, can we get Thanksgiving first? I'm hungry. Hey y'all, it's Kadeen. And DeVal.

The hosts of Ellis Ever After podcast. This holiday season, whether you're cooking for the family, out buying gifts for the kids, or crowded in holiday traffic, tune out the noise, and tune in to Ellis Ever After. On Ellis Ever After,

we get real with our crew about family. If you feeling like you feeling, that's probably because you're a good parent. Friendship. Be careful what you put in your body. Move your body and love it the way you love them cars that house them, them clothes, them shoes.

Them brunches. Love and marriage. You know what's become attractive to me? And it's because I've self-corrected and I guess I detoxified myself. Accountability. Oh, yeah. That is bad attractive. So attractive to me and everything else in between. I've told my most embarrassing moment on this podcast before, which was me taking a

So listen to Ellis Ever After on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. It's okay not to be okay sometimes and be able to build strength and love within each other. Thanksgiving isn't just about food. It's a day for us to show up for one another. I'm Elliot Connie, host of the podcast Family Therapy, a series where real families come together to heal and find hope. What would be a clue that would be like? Lots of tech messages from him. This one's from a little bit better of a version of him.

Because he's feeding himself well. It's always a concern. Like, are you eating well? He's actually an amazing cook. There was this one time where we had neighbors and I saved their dog and I ended up inviting them over for food and that was like one of my proudest moments.

This is Family Therapy. Real families, real stories on a journey to heal together. Listen to season two of Family Therapy every Wednesday on the Black Effect podcast, Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro, host of the hit podcast Family Secrets. We were in the car, like a Rolling Stone came on, and he said, there's a line in there about

your mother. And I said, what? What I would do if I didn't feel like I was being accepted is choose an identity that other people can't have. I knew something had happened to me in the middle of the night, but I couldn't hold on to what had happened. These are just a few of the moving and important stories I'll be holding space for on my upcoming 13th season of Family Secrets. Whether you've been on this journey with me from season one or just joining the Family Secrets family, we're so happy to have you with us. I'll dive deep into the incredible power of secrets, the ones that shape our identities, test our relationships, and ultimately reveal who we truly are. Listen to Family Secrets on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you could give your old self-advice about parenting teenagers specifically, what would you say?

I would have done it totally different. I know. I got to say, I... You and I were different with raising kids. You were much more strict and... I remember you telling me the story about your son, and you said, oh, well, leave. You're out. Yeah.

I had, but that leads into the point I just made. My son, one of my sons, was, you know, he had to learn by the school of hard knocks. And when push came to shove, I said, this is my home. And if you don't like it, you can leave. And he did. He was adult, by the way. He was 21 back from college. And I said, if you don't like it, you can leave.

leave and he did and he today is a responsible unbelievable husband father and human being but i think it is because he had to suffer the consequences of his behavior and i think i don't understand i had three kids i have three children they all had summer jobs they all had chores run the house i was i i plead guilty i was a very strict parent they did their home work. We had study time. They didn't watch TV during the week. They were only allowed to game. That's why you have three great kids, yeah.

Well, but they had to earn their spending money for college. We were lucky enough to be able to afford their tuition, but I said, you have to earn all your own spending money, which they did. And yet, not all my kids are the same, you know, occasionally

I'll get this, you know, woe is me conversation. And I'm like, I don't You were so hard on us, mom. My kids I went hard on them and I totally was not. I was the cool mom. My boys, and Dickie and I would have arguments. They couldn't get summer jobs because they played baseball and they were athletes. Did they have jobs around the house?

To work. Oh, yeah. They had things they had to do here, yes. But they never had to earn any money. No. No, that baseball was going to be their life? They could have been major league baseball players. They did something stupid.

took a walk on the wild side and that cost heartache as well as finance like you could not believe and they got in trouble and I could go on for days over this. It was sad and heartbreaking, but we just prayed at the end of it they'd come out healthy. But there again, if I were to say, well, I'm not going to pay for a lawyer. We have to pay the bill for the lawyer. Like you, that's a tough call for a parent to say, no, you're on your own. No, no, no. I wasn't talking. talking about that. I always talk about things like, you know, I'm sorry that you missed your car payment because you were out partying with your friends. So, you know, I'm going to make the car payment. You're not going to see the car for a month. I mean, that kind of stuff I did. Exactly.

Okay, so we go from raising kids. We just got to go back real quickly before we end this segment to. Yes. Do you remember giving birth to your children and coming home with a new baby? I mean, they go from birth. They didn't come with a book of rules and book of things. Oh, my God. What the hell do I do now? I have to tell you, my neighbor next door, her mother was a foster mother. So she had, you know, slung 60, literally 65 babies. So when I had my first born and I came home and I thought, what the hell do I do I do with this thing? I mean, literally, I had no idea I was doing. I had, I was nursing. My breast got infected. You name by my epiziotomy got him. I mean, you don't want to know. I was like, no one, no one has a second child. No one. No one does.

after what I went through. And then come home with two babies at one time. With the toddler running around, you're like, what the actual... So I have to tell you, my chiropractor, who I love, who's taking care of my back right now, they just had their first baby. And I've been going twice a week because of my back. I was saying, how's it going? The baby's like, you know, 11 weeks old.

He said, we finally get some sleep. Sleep. Oh, my God. He said, his wife, tell me if this rings a bell to you. His wife is constantly checking this. baby breathing the baby's crib is in their room because especially if they slept for first time more than two hours something's wrong hold the mirror up to their nose to see if they're breathing he said he goes I don't know she called me the other day and said the baby's crying and he's like yeah

I mean can you remember those days do you remember did you have any colicky babies no oh kathie well I i Caitlin just screamed maybe that was caught my third child my first two I thought parenting was easy. They slept through the night at six weeks, literally slept through the night from 10 to 5 at 6 weeks. Caitlin and the other hand screamed from 7 to 11 every night. Things haven't really changed much either. But then she had one.

No, she's cutting. And you know what happened? I got really smart once she had a child. But I'm saying just real quickly, did things change for you and your husband and your whole? And I'm not talking just sex. What husband? He wasn't even involved.

I didn't even want to, like, do his laundry anymore. I'm like, come on, I got a baby. This is taking all of my time. Is it crazy how it just consumes you? Yes. Everything baby. And there's like, is no advice you can give to young ones. And I have said this.

Make sure you still keep a date night. Make sure you, you know. Well, not when the baby's first born. They, no, not first born. But with raising kids, it's so important. And I think it ruins. so many marriages. It does. You have to make time for your

partner. I will say that you're right. It can really, you know, the husband typically gets very jealous. At least that was my experience. My husband didn't. And they're not getting sex as often as they used to and you're like, really?

You know what kind of day I had? She was screaming. She puked all over the car seat. I had a clean. Now you want me to pull down my pants and have sex? I don't think so. All I can say is when my husband, when I can distinctly remember him coming at me the first time, I don't know how many weeks my son's like, I'm not ready. I know.

I said, you get away. Like, my eyes almost jumped out of my head. Like, get the hell away from me. And I remember thinking, I remember I said this thing that came out from the hospital with me, like who has the second one? Yeah, right. I distinctly remember when my son turned 14 months old saying to my husband, You know, I might consider having a second child, like, might.

And of course, you know, my oldest son was three years. No, he was three years, nine months before I had the second one. It was like, how do people do this 18 months apart stuff? I don't know. Children change your life in such wonderful ways. And then other people I know don't have children, they don't regret it. I think I would regret not having children. Well, that's because we wanted to be mothers.

There's people that don't want that. And I respect it. You know, they might not be good parents or something if they know that already. I used to say I have to have children who's going to take care of us when we get old, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen either. God forbid. But like you said earlier, these things that build us and things that happen in our life, that's how we're built.

That's how we become who we are. So we're really blessed to have gone through it. And that is the final answer to what we would do differently. You just said it. The things that we struggle with in life are the things that build our character and make us who we are. So if you're a parent of a teenager, don't feel badly. Stick to your guns. Absolutely.

Any of you out there that are relating with us and laughing right now with your cup of coffee, we get it. We get it. And if you have a better story, share it. One hell of a coffee talk. I'll say it. The difference is young parents sit and have coffee talks. You and I having this conversation at our stage in life, we're having wine talks.

Which I'm ready for. I'm going to go get a haircut, actually. And you know what? That does it for today's episode of Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. I've enjoyed this so much. And thanks to all of you for joining us. Be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour as we have new episodes coming out of every week you don't want to miss them if you are at all interested in susan's and my opinions about

life and we have many of them this is the place to hear about them and you know what to do if you want us to talk about what you want to talk about make sure to submit your questions to us and you can go to bachelornation.com slash golden hour or hit us up on social at bachelor happy hour we're always here for you we are listen to bachelor happy hours golden hour on the iHeart radio app or we're wherever you listen to your podcasts. Until next time, have a great week. Absolutely. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is Gentleman's Cut.

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Bourbon, please visit gentlemen'scutturbin.com. Please enjoy responsibly. I'm Robert Smith, and this is Jacob Goldstein, and we used to host a show called Planet Money. And now we're back making this new podcast called Business History, about the best ideas and people and businesses in history. And some of the worst people, horrible ideas, and destructive companies in the history of First episode, how Southwest Airlines use cheap seats and free whiskey to fight its way into the airline is. The most Texas story ever. Listen to business history on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Atlanta is a spirit.

It's not just a city. It's where Kronk was born in a club in the West End. A four world star, it was five, five, nine. Where preachers go viral, and students at the HPCU turned heartbreak into resurrection. Where Dream was brought Hollywood to the South. and hustlers bring their visions to create black wealth. Nobody's rushing into relationships with you. I'm Big Rube.

Listen to Atlanta is on the I Heart Radio app. Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcast. I knew it was a bomb the second that it exploded. I felt it ripped through me. In season two of Rip Current, we asked, who tried to kill Judy Berry and why? They were climbing trees and they were sabotaging equipment in the woods.

She received death threats before the bombing. She received more threats after the bombing. I think that this is a deliberate attempt to sabotage our movement. Episodes of Rip Current Season 2 are available now. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You know the shade is always Shadiest right here. Season 6 of the podcast Reasonably Shady with Jazele Bryan and Robin Dixon is here dropping every Monday. As two of the founding members of the Real Housewives Potomac were giving you all the laughs, drama, and reality news you can handle.

And you know we don't hold back. So come be reasonable or shady with us each and every Monday. Listen to reasonably shady from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.