Bachelor Happy Hour - Serena Kerrigan Is Getting Rachel Recchia a Boyfriend | Happy Hour

Episode Date: September 22, 2026

Today on “Happy Hour,” Rachel is joined by author and social media icon Serena Kerrigan! Serena is here to give us the rundown on her new book, “Let’s F💋cking Date,” and is giving all the single women a crash course on dating. Serena is telling us everything that’s wrong with dating and how women can remember they are the prize. What advice does she have for the next women to be on “The Bachelor”? What advice does she have for Rachel in her single era? Serena is telling and she is not holding back! Tune in now and be sure to subscribe.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Ready for your next adventure? Etihad's global sale is here. Witness Nairobi's living traditions. Set sail on Phuket's pristine waters. Or let wonder be your guide in Kuala Lumpur. Book by Thursday and take off to over 50 destinations on sale.

Travel from October 26 to March 27. Book now at etihad.com. Etihad. Beyond Borders Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches There's a lot of suspense Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pasto survive the first bite?

Will the lunchbox come home empty, half full, or come home at all? And will you finish episode 8 before you're done slicing the cucumbers? Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Craved Netflix and Disney Plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet

with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.com for details and to check availability. Bill. Connection is everything. Hey, everyone. It's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rudd, Michael Bublay, Seth Myers. And making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters, like Alex and Ashton Earl. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone that's too.

Okay, well, control is a harsh word. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voicemails and giving advice. Listen to Hey Jonas on America's number one podcast network, IHeart. Follow Hey Jonas and start listening on the free IHeart Radio app today. Hey Jonas is sponsored by edible arrangements. Order yours today at edible.com. Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast.

It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Youanu. We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa Di Giulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. Now in my 30s, being the founder of new shoes, good taste is my business. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman.

Angel Geratana. Jeremy Colhain. Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast. The improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up?

He winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone. I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hour. I am Rachel, and today we are here with social media icon author and woman behind doing it for the plot. Serena Kerrigan, welcome to Bachelor Happy Hour.

Thank you so much for having me. You know, I once wanted to be on The Bachelor. So this is very full circle. I was going to ask, because you kind of were the Bachelorette during COVID. You had your own season virtually. It's called That's Fucking Date. I used to work at Refron 29, which is this women's media company in 2016. And girls would leave post-its on my desk being like, when are you going on The Bachelor?

Like, I just remember that was such a thing. And then COVID happened before I could even like consider applying, I guess. And I was like, I don't want to go on The Bachelor because I want to be, like, I don't want to fight over man like they have to fight over me so that's why i created my own version on instagram live and i didn't end up with anyone in the end but it was really really fun and for the plot i wanted to ask because this kind of you're all for the roster right which we'll get into and for those listening i'm halfway through her book i'm a student of this book at the point she was annotating highlighting i really am and i saw that you said it's a good thing to have a roster and while you were the virtual

a bachelor's, you're dating multiple people. What did that teach you about dating and did any ideas for this book happen from that? Absolutely. I was someone who I would fall in love at first make out. So, if a man, it was giving me attention, I would be so obsessed and created these stories in my head because it crushes the lack of information. And so the best way that made me feel in control was when I had options. Like, that really was it. Because that's what dating is. You're dating until you were not, right you are single until you are not so it's important to test the water see what else is out there compare and contrast like you might be talking to a guy and thinking you like him or do you like the attention that he's giving you do you like the fact that he's texting you that he makes a plan

like that that's great but maybe that that's not actually because you like him but you like that he's doing you know bare minimum effort so the way to feel more control feel empowered and feel like you have options is really to have options and so I always say like it doesn't have to be like a full-fledged relationship at a time, obviously. It's like you have a date with a guy on a Tuesday. You might have another one on Thursday and you're also texting this guy that you met at a bar. You're asking your friend to set you up. You're just energetically going on dates. And I think that we know we're empowered women. We have careers. We sometimes are at work and then we don't want to go on a date. Like we don't want to give up that time. And I think you,

if you want to find a partner, you have to date. Oh, and I hate that part. I wish he was just show up at my house. Right. So he's not going to. Which is why I'm reading this book. And I know I'm jumping around. Serena is the author of Let's Fucking Date. Where did the idea and when did you decide that this book needs to come to fruition? Honestly, after I started dating my boyfriend for we're now on three years. And I feel like that's when I was like, okay, all my advice was right. Because before I would give advice and then people were like, okay, your advice is great, but like you're still single. So how good is it? And I was like, good point. But I was, but I was like, okay, well, those can't do teach.

So maybe like that's why I'm really good at teaching. And then eventually I did me by person. And I was like, okay, all my advice was right. I'm not going to put into a book. Because I think that social media to some degree, there's not enough nuance. It's like you're getting people's attention with 15 second clips. Like it was great to write something that really served to function a woman who's dating. And not.

She just could be focusing on herself or she's already in a relationship where like I wanted that if you were ever feeling anxious, there would be someone. a.k. me there for you in the pages to give you a hug and a slap in the face. This book is a book about confidence. It is about dating, but it really helps women to realize that they're the prize. Why is it that so many of us now want to be chosen and we forget that we're actually the prize? I feel like it's scarcity mentality. I feel like on social media, like we're constantly. I know you know this. It's like everyone's getting fucking engaged every five seconds and then the babies. and it feels like your algorithm is like, you know, and it's like, it's suffocating.

And, you know, back then we weren't, didn't have that much information. We weren't paying attention to what other people were doing. So because of that, it almost feels like we're being left behind. And then there's not enough good men out there. And then, okay, this one guy, he, he liked me on a dating app. I'm going to go on a date with him. Okay, I think he's it. Like, so we constantly want the validation that we were, we have someone because we think

that there's no one else left out there. is there are eight billion people on this planet everyone finds their person and you have to believe that if you don't believe it it's not going to come true it is funny that you are on the bachelor podcast because the premise I guess of the show is to chase one person I know and to be chosen it's against everything I stand for it's against it how could you maintain I guess that mindset for the people who are on the show oh 100% because at the end of the day your person is going to choose you And I think the bachelor's great in the sense of like you are dating. You're getting to know someone.

Obviously the ratio is a little off. But like the person that is meant for you is going to be there for you. Nothing you can do can mess it up. I really believe that. And I think that like I used to get really anxious about like how many whys should I put on the end of this hay or like how much time should I win? Yeah. Oh my God.

Is it every text to my friends? Every single one until I met my boyfriend and I never did. Because I think that when you're with the right person, you feel safe to be yourself and you're not performing, you're not editing, you're not overwhelmed on like how, what should I, will I do something that will mess this up because it won't? So when you're on The Bachelor, you have to just be yourself and whether you're the Bachelor in real life, not real life, on TV, just have to be yourself and trust that your person is going to like you for you because they will.

You talked about in your book, the three piece. Yeah. Can you tell us a little bit about that and how you came up with this strategy? I think it's brilliant. I feel like there's no such thing as a shitty date. in the sense of like you go on a first date and the only thing you should be thinking about is is there potential for a second date not potential for marriage not potential to win the bachelor just a second date right and so that's step one so okay that's the first p potential

then let's say you get on the date and you realize okay there isn't really potential for a second date like I'm okay with never seeing this person again not because anything is wrong just like it's not my I don't like them right that happens all the time you go on dates of people you don't like that is what I call practice because what do you know that the stakes are low and you're probably never going to see them again suddenly you're more relaxed you may tell a funny story like you just might feel good in your skin you're more feeling like the prize because you're just like this isn't for me right and then of course so that is the second p practice and then the third p is plot let's say the date is a motherfucking disaster that's my favorite one right like so bad you're going to

tell it on a podcast you're going to tell it to a friend you're going to tell it to your kids you're going to tell it your memoir. So regardless, every experience is just pushing you further on your journey of being the main character and also knowing what you want out of a relationship, what you know you want in a partner. So it's a win, win, win. Every day it's a win, win, win. I love that. On The Bachelor, and actually I feel like a lot of dating shows, something that we always hear is, I just need some more time. What's your take on building a relationship with someone? Can it grow? Do you need to go on three dates to actually? see if you like that person or what's your idea with like that I think time is so great and I

think we tend to rush things I'm one of my biggest rules is two drinks and ditch I think that we sometimes think if the date is going really well we want to do a marathon date I love a marathon date I was so guilty when I read that we're done I'm trying yes the two dates and ditch where did you come up with that theory because anytime I'd stay longer than three drinks babe I was nothing ever good happened I never saw them again I never saw them again. I've never heard of someone saying I've been, and great day, there's always exceptions to the rule.

And the internet loves to be like, but me, but, no. Okay. In general, I've never heard of a marathon date ending in a really serious, strong relationship. I think it's better. It's about you, it's not because if you stay later, they're not going to like you. Please, let's remove that. Remember, it's all about you can't mess this up. It's more just like for you, you start, your perception of them, I think, is blurred.

It's like, are you drunk or do you like them? was that you just spent a lot of time with them and you've invested so much time and you maybe got to work late so now do like them you know what I mean it's like it's like it's better to if it's leave on a high leave before the roller coaster's going down and let them pursue you if they want to see you so badly they'll ask you on another date that's another thing I read in your book about going on a date and not performing because I feel like so many of us go on a date in a way performing just to make sure that they like us to then see if I like them did you catch yourself? doing that at all day. All the time. Literally all the time. Like I'd be at a date with a guy,

not a first date because we don't do dinner for a first date. Just two drinks and ditch. I've been stuck in that and I realize it's actually horrific. No, horrible because then you're stuck first course, second course. Oh, you want dessert? No, I don't fucking want dessert. I want to leave, but you can't because then you feel bad because they're paying, right? Two drinks and and ditch always. It doesn't even have to be alcoholic, whatever works for you, but just it needs to be two glasses of whatever it is, okay? And then you're out of there. You have Pilates in the morning. I don't care. But I remember I would go on dates and for dinner dates. I would, I know that I would perform when like we'd look at the menu and, you know, he ordered a burger and I was like,

I'll just order the salad. It's like, why? Like, why aren't you ordering what you want to order? Like, why are you screenshoting text to your friends being like, what should I respond? Like, that is what, like, whenever someone is like, I don't know what to say at the sky or like, how do I stop myself from being obsessed with him? I'm like, this is a senior person. Because you will feel so safe, so calm, so peace and so, you won't be. You won't be. You won't be. You won't thinking about performing there's not even a question of that it's going to feel so natural and you're just going to be yourself and so until you feel that way never settle what's your thought on instant chemistry and butterflies because I feel like that's what

everyone is chasing right is it a bad thing when you get those butterflies that you're nervous you're obsessed right away it's terrible really yes I feel like we're all chasing the butterflies and I think that that's what Hollywood I don't know what what writer was convincing us? Totally. I think that that is a lot of what we're told to chase literally as we're growing up. What I realized was actually like you want the opposite of that. You want literal like stillness, softness, like peace, just stability like this, a straight line. It doesn't mean that you're not excited. It doesn't mean that you're bored. It's just you feel really at ease. That's what we want to look for. And of course you can like get excited and like

have little butterflies. But is that butterfly? Are they anxiety? Is it obsession? Is it, if he doesn't call him and start sobbing, not your person. Because he's going to call if he's your person, right? So that's why you feel at ease. I also loved, I mean, I'm like quoting her book. No, I'm obsessed.

I love this so much. Because I was reading last night, you said if they don't text you within 24 hours, they're not the one. Do you stand by that? Ten toes down. 24 hours. If they, like, if it was two days. So you went on a date and you had a great time.

They had the privilege. of being across from you for two hours and then you left and the next day they want to date you they're not going to text you bullshit what immediately what if they text you like you got home had a great time but then they take two days to follow up on another plan cut off done i say i think i don't love it i think you can do it but they want to lock that shit in why are they waiting two days. They better have a fucking amazing excuse. Like I was waiting on my work schedule. But they'll

want to make some kind of, okay, the actual plan doesn't have to happen within 24 hours, but it has to be like, I want to see you again. Can I see you this week? Something like that. Ready for your next adventure? Etihad's global sale is here. Witness Nairobi's living traditions.

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Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches, there's a lot of suspense. Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pasto survive the first bite? Will the lunchbox come home empty, half full, or come home at all? And will you finish episode 8 before you're done slicing the cucumbers? Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave

Netflix and Disney Plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.com.com. Connection is everything. Hey, everyone. It's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas Podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rudd, Michael Boubley, Seth Myers. And making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters, like Alex and Ashton Earl.

She likes to control everyone and tell everyone that to do. Okay, well control is a harsh word. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voicemails and giving advice. Listen to Hey Jonas on America's number one podcast network, IHeart. Follow Hey Jonas and start listening on the free IHeart Radio app today. Hey Jonas is sponsored by Edible Arrangements. Order yours today at edible.com. Lisa? We should tell them about our new show.

Oh my God, Lexi. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Ewanio. We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa Di Giulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. I'm not going to get anyone fighting.

That is wild. I learned that about you today. Now in my 30s, being the founder of new shoes, good taste is my business, and I've always got something to say. If men were just honest about this, there would be so much more peace in the world. We're going to talk about dating, relationships, beauty, getting older, and a little wiser. We're best friends, but we don't always agree. Because you told us how accommodating you are. Obviously, I would do what I think I could do to fight the fight,

but there's only so much fight I can fight. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Liar. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.

I don't really care. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman. Angel Geratana. Jeremy Colhane, Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists, on artist podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast where each week

a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know. Have you guys heard of faux journaling?

Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading. So we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay. A panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No!

I've been dying too. I'm so sorry. I'm seeing a reading of Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audra McDonald's at the Wonderland Bookstore on 14th. That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark 30. No way. You have to come to the last bookstore though. Kim Cottrell is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween. He gets right up next to the microphone.

I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the IHeard radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's the biggest mistake you see people like me making? Clearly like that. Everything she's like clearly you do not know what you're doing. No, it's just more like what is the love you believe you deserve. I always grew up wanting the like Hollywood like just like all the I didn't grow up.

My parents are divorced. They didn't get remarried. So I didn't grow up. I don't have siblings. So I didn't grow up with like that relationship and that falling in love and that like healthy relationship. So I wanted that really badly. And I realized that a lot of me, the way that I was going to get that is putting boundaries when that wasn't happening. But we don't do that.

We're like guys fucking suck. But we don't do. We don't put in the work to cut off those men when they don't treat us well. Right? Absolutely. It should be really easy in the beginning. So when it's not easy, when you're in your head, when you're questioning if you likes you, let it go because there's always going to be another guy. There is.

We always have people in this exact chair that sit down and they say dating in Los Angeles is impossible. Actually, we just had someone here who said that before you. I hope you fucking mute them. What is your take? Because I genuinely believe it's hard to date in Los Angeles. I wrote an entire chapter called dispelling the worst city to date in myth lie

it is bullshit it pisses me off what about someone in bum fuck middle of nowhere like I'm thinking somewhere like completely deserted whatever that I understand okay it's difficult you are in a major city and I think it's all perspective the reason why you have to be really careful

about how you speak about dating in general is that your words will become reality if you say LA is the worst place to date or any city is the worst place to date in it will become the worst place to do it. That is how you're going to look at it. So that's one. Perspective is everything.

You could say that. I think L.A. is great because, you know, people are happy here. It's a really great quality of life. They're healthy here. Let's just say, right? Generally speaking, they're creative here. Those are all really great plusses

that you might not have in another city, right? In New York, people love to say it's a terrible state. What do you mean? There's so many people. You can walk everywhere, so that means you can have more spontaneity, right? You could always look at it from a glass half full or a glass half empty.

But I really believe that the thing that you can't control a lot about dating. You're right. You can't control about the men you date in your city. But you can control as yourself, which is your mentality and putting yourself out there, which is going on dates and having a good fucking attitude about it and having fun. Like, there are men here. So, therefore, that makes it a good place to date.

What do you have to say to the people who are like, I'm going out? I'm not seeing the men out. Where should they meet men in public, I guess, in the wild? Great question. What you're going to do is you're not going to go on in Google like hottest places to meet men in L.A. On TikTok? Best place. I've literally looked up that on TikTok and I'm not kidding. And by the way, any of I've ever done that? Never mind. They weren't there. Ever. So what you're going to do is you're going to go outside your comfort zone. Like, when is the last time you went to a coffee shop that you've never been to before?

Couldn't tell you. When I'm on vacation. When I'm on vacation. Okay. There you got. I want you to get into that vacation mentality, which is also in the book. where when we go on vacation, we are adventurous, we are magnetic because we have no stakes. We like end up flirting with that guy at the hotel bar because we're going to leave. Like we're tan, we're viving. Like, I want that energy. Bring that the fuck back home. Exactly. I love that you said that when you're traveling.

Why aren't you going to a new coffee shop? You might meet someone there. You might meet a woman who is an amazing brother who's going to be the love of your life. When's the last time you went to a different workout class? When's the last time you got went to a different grocery store? When is the last time you really went out of your bubble? Like I even me like in New York I am pretty stationary, you know like I realize I'm like I haven't challenged myself and it's not just about meeting a guy. It's just about being alive and honestly squeezing the juice out of what life has to offer because at the end of the day you're going to meet someone not when you're Googling or TikTok and where are they. It's really going to happen when you don't expect it, which is very annoying. But to get to those places where you don't expect it is when you are doing things that you enjoy and that surprise you and that push you outside of. your comfort. Speaking of vacation mentality, you met your boyfriend when you were about to move.

Yes. Talk about that. How did you meet your boyfriend? And do you think it was the mindset that attracted him to you in that way? A hundred percent. So I grew up in New York my entire life. I only left for college, came right back. I was 29 and I was like, I'm really fed up. Like it's cooked. Like I maybe I need to step outside of my comfort zone. I was like, I need to live somewhere else. Okay, I'm moving to L.A. You know, I can't drive. I barely have a license. since like I'm just going to go and step outside my comfort zone. And so I ended my lease. I told all my friends, no one believed me. But I was like, no, I'm serious. Like I'm doing this. So I had the whole summer to kind of figure out what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it.

But because I had that mentality of I'm leaving New York, I'm moving somewhere else. There was no stakes because I was going to leave. I started saying yes to so many different things. I was saying yes to dates with guys I would never consider. I was saying yes to podcast, which is where I ended up meeting my boyfriend. I was a guest on his podcast. I was just like, I'm going to say yes to everything because I'm leaving. And like I want to suck everything up the same way we do when we go to Paris or any place, right? Miami. We're always just saying yes, yes, yes, yes. How do we start saying yes more? So I went on his podcast. I literally didn't even have mascaraa. Like I look so much better for you than I did on his. Duh, girl power. But I went on that and not any idea. And I sat down and it was

just like fireworks. Were you attracted to him immediately? Yes, but it was more just like I felt felt so seen, so safe. So, yeah, I was obviously attracted him, but it was just very, it took me totally by surprise. I started immediately talking about my dating life on the podcast. Great it. I had a background in dating, obviously. That was like my whole fucking brand. But like immediately I was like, okay.

Like, I feel like I'm too much for guys. And like my personality is too big and I'm too intimidating. And he was like, well, for the right guy, it'll be the perfect amount. I was like, are you hitting on me? Love him. I'm down. Love. So did he ask you out right away?

So after the podcast, I text him saying I had a really nice time. And ladies, you can absolutely text guys first. I was going to ask. So you reached out in a way first. I reached out first because it was authentic and genuine. I was like, I had a really good time on that podcast. Yeah, we were like playing footsy on the table. It was really fun.

But I would never say we should go out some time. No, no, no, no, no, no. So you want to get a drink tonight? Coffee. Absolutely not. That is on him. So he said, I would love to continue. without mics and cameras. Great. We're official three weeks later. What was it about him on that

first date that was different from your other dates? I mean, I think it's even, I would cut the podcast kind of as our first date unknowingly. And the fact that you guys have it on camera is psychotic. That's so plain at your wedding. Yes. Insane. Same, same, same. No, his mom, like, watched it. Like, the second she knew about us and she was taking notes, I can't, I can't. It's really cute. But I think it was that. It was, I think as women were constantly, like, especially being successful or having opinions being outspoken, then we're suddenly told like, well, you're going to be too intimidating for a man. But I thought you told me to like be empowered and like take up space.

No, no, no. But then it's like it's, it, I feel like the too much thing. I've never heard a man ever talk about his dating. And I can be like, I feel like I'm too much for a woman. I'm too much. Men don't fucking say that. It's only women who say that. So to have him immediately be like, no, wait, like you're not too much.

Like for the right person, you're going to be exactly the right amount. You don't have to change anything about yourself. you can be safe to be yourself that to me where I was like whoa I don't have to perform I don't have to edit I don't and I never screenshoted a single text to this day you like what should I say with you like ever right so that is one of you know that is when you know you're in a good place did he pursue dating you then with full intention you never had a question where he was at or was there a point where you're like where is this going with him never in a million years if they like you you'll know if not you'll be confused tattoo that onto your fucking brain onto my forehead literally what do you have to say then about situationships can they be made into relationships fuck no and i just put oh are you surprised women everywhere women everywhere heartbroken wait i'm so sorry what guys if they and i i recently posted this and i got a lot of like people are like well one time my friend got married exception not the damn rule if they are having sex with you if they're seeing you consistently why aren't you why aren't you guys dating that

What is it? If they wanted to date you, they would have by now. How long do they have until they should make it official? Three months. Maximum. I can't even believe it would have to take that long to get there, but that's where you have to say, like, hey, I'm enjoying seeing you. I'm not quite sure where your head is at, which, by the way, is a red fucking flag. Because if he liked you and he was your man, you would know, but whatever, I'm not really sure where your head is at.

But I'm looking for something serious and I want to pursue that with you. you how do you feel about that and it's a yes or no and if he says no i'm not ready great next but we don't even have that conversation because we're too afraid because we deep down we know the answer asking what are we is the bane in my existence because you know the answer already you just don't want to be rejected oh i feel so called out on this broadcast no but it's good because now after this you are going to be it's black and white for you it's like either you're pursuing me or you're not and you don't have time for the men that aren't pursuing you because when you stick around in the men that aren't pursuing you, but they're just like seeing you, casual, whatever, you're actually, they're taking

up too much space in your mental and you actually can't see the actually, the guy that might be right in front of you that wants to date you. What do you think is one piece of advice in this book that people will disagree with the most? It's probably a lot, honestly, or maybe like, the controversial take of a man having to pay on the first date. Ooh, what the fuck? Because your take is they should as well as mine. Of course. It's not even a question. I'm sorry. One, gender pay gap it's not equal to hair nails tan eyebrows clothes i watch my boyfriend get out of the shower 10 minutes he's ready i'm like fuck you i spend so we spend so much time on our appearance my foundation is 60 dollars like i can't even believe the prices genuinely and then but even all that aside

the way that a man shows interest is by pursuing you the way he shows the way he is pursuing you is through action it's through making a plan and if he makes he makes that plan, he should pay for that plan. So let the man be a man. Like, don't emasculate him and be like, I got it. I was just with someone. And they were like, but sometimes I just like, I feel bad. I want to take care of him.

You're not his mommy. Let him take care of you. And by the way, this doesn't have to be Nobu Malvo. This doesn't have to be like for Charles. He could be a fucking like taco stand for all I care. That's fine. As long as he's making the plan, he's picking the time and he's paying the bell. Great.

That to me is pursuing. Do you believe that when men are spending money or time on someone, I guess what's the right word to say that? Like they're putting something into you. Right. Investing. Investing. Do you think when men invest in women, it makes them want to pursue them more?

Fuck, yeah. And when you're giving that shit for free and you're like, come over like, well, Netflix and chill and like, we'll just order it and I'll got it. Like, no, there's what are they pursuing? They have you right there. I love that you brought that up because you said no cooking at home. Yeah. within the first couple days. I am victim to let me cook for you. I love you so much. We've made a lot

of the same mistakes. It's okay. And it's always the third date and that's always where things go wrong. So why don't we wait to do that until we're in a relationship? When that is the right time for the cooking at home date? I think when we're in a relationship. So you cannot go to their house until it's locked down. No, no, you can go to their house. I don't think you need to cook for them. No, like they always say, I'll come over and cook for you or come over and I'll cook. I think he can cook for you but like I don't know I think that I think what okay let's take this back first two dates should be out in the world I think third date maybe it's like you do a fun activity or like you do dinner or when you start seeing them more consistently dates three or four do an activity there's

something about the activity in the home that I struggle with it feels a little like a secret fast pass past in the bedroom, right? Mm-hmm. Like, I was cooking pasta with this guy, but I wasn't, like, like, I bought all the ingredients and, like, he didn't bring anything. You did?

Yes. So he was, like, all cookie pasta at your house, but, like, I had to provide everything. And he, like, stirred, he, like, poured in the pasta. You couldn't even, like, door dash something? Right. So, like. Postmates?

And then we ended up fucking, and then I never saw him again. So I'm just saying. Mm-hmm. Okay. So we're going to put that on pause until we have it locked down. I'm, like, mental note of everything. I need updates for your dating. Like I feel you're going to do 180 and you're just going to like I'm telling you. I feel like next year you're literally

going to, you're going to be in a full blown, full blown fucking relationship. I can't wait. I'm going to message you. Ready for your next adventure? Etihad's global sale is here. Witness Nairobi's living traditions. Set sail on Pouquet's pristine waters or let wonder be your guide in Kuala Lumpur. Book by Thursday and take off to over 50. the destinations on sale. Travel from October 26 to March 27. Book now at Etihad.com. Etihad, Beyond Borders.

Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches, there's a lot of suspense. Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pastos survive the first bite? Will the lunchbox come home empty, half full, or come home at all? And will you finish episode 8 before you're done slicing the cucumbers? Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave Netflix and Disney.

plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for details and to check availability. Bell, connection is everything. Hey, everyone. It's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rudd, Michael Bublay, Seth Myers. And making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters,

like Alex and Ashton Earl. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone. Okay, well control is a harsh word. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voicemails and giving advice. Listen to Hey Jonas on America's number one podcast network, IHeart. Follow Hey Jonas and start listening on the free IHeart Radio app today. Hey Jonas is sponsored by Edible Arrangements. Order yours today at edible.com.

Lisa? We should tell them about our new show. Oh my God, Lexi. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Youan. We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa Di Giulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

I'm not going to get anyone fighting. That is wild. I learned that about you today. Now in my 30s, being the founder of new shoes, good taste is my business, and I've always got something to say. If men were just honest about this, there would be so much more peace in the world. We're going to talk about dating, relationships, beauty, getting older, and a little wiser. We're best friends, but we don't always agree. Because you told us how accommodating you are.

Obviously, I would do what I think I could do to fight the fight, but there's only so much fight I can fight. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Don't lie to me. Liar. Listen on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcast. I don't really care. I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast. The True Crime Comedy Podcasts. all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it. Each week, I bring on incredible guests like Conan O'Brien, Iowa Debris, Lamorne Morris, and Nicole Byer.

Ooh, I scammed them. What? I can talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And the scams run the gamut. I'm talking about scams from the 1800s all the way up to today. I also warn you and keep you safe against scammers.

Call your grandparents. Tell your parents to stop clicking. and on links, please. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. If there's a scam, I'm here to protect you. And I'm also here to laugh with you. So if you like fun, if you like comedy and you like learning and protecting yourself from criminals, start listening to scam goddess on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever

you get your podcast. If you could get this book into the hands of all 25 women who will be on the next season of The Bachelor, what would you want them to take from this book? First of all, is that an opportunity? I would love to. Can you make that happen? We like pass it all out. We literally, they're in the hotel room with your book.

Because I know, don't they only get like the Bible on there, right? Don't you guys only get the Bible? No, we get like, well, we're waiting. You can bring a book. Oh, you can bring a book. Yeah, I was reading Akitar. Yeah. I fully thought that you guys were only allowed to read the Bible.

You can't bring it like so once the cameras start rolling, no, no books. Just your mind. Just your mind. Your imagination gets really good. You just lay there and you just like start thinking about just the bachelor and you just close your eyes. A crush is just a lack of information. Damn.

I would be so bad on the voucher. It's really good. I think you'd be amazing, actually. Really? I actually think you'd be phenomenal. I don't know. I would get so obsessed. Like, so quick.

I don't know if I'd be like the villain or I'd know. I'd be the bitch. I was like powering everyone up and like, and like, excited. It's a shame that we'll never know. It is a shame that we'll ever know. What is one thing you would want them to take from this book to implement during their time on the show?

I think that ultimately your person is going to be, this is even better. The love of your life is going to want to date you. And that's it. It's that simple. So if he doesn't want to date you, it's not the love of your life. Like, do not stop at anything. The love of your life wants to fucking date you. Like, how simple is that?

It's crazy because it's so simple. But every time, and I will give the girls credit because you always think, you're like, oh, well, he has this, this, this and this. and you start making excuses for yourself on why it's not working out. And it's never just as simple in your mind of he just doesn't want to, he's just not that into you. And that's okay. Because I think that you know why, because that is a tough pill to swallow. And sometimes that feels like rejection.

And rejection sucks. But the best way to get overrejection is to keep getting rejected. Legit like exposure therapy. Like if I was about to go on The Bachelor, I would go on dates constantly. That's a great way to prep for it. Because when you get rejected, then when you, let's say you go on the show and you get rejected, it doesn't hurt as much because you realize that like it just wasn't meant to be because the love of my life will want to date me. And so he's so he's not the love of my life. Simple.

Listen to this, guys. Should I go on the bathroom and like coach the girls? I feel like that'd be so good. We do a date with you. Oh, my God. I'm waiting for the call. We're plotting. You can host a date.

That'd be so fun. So fun. Okay. What's your final piece of advice for single woman who have truly lost hope and dating? Why are you losing home? Why? People are there But why?

Like, why are we losing hope? Okay, here, this is the best way to zero. Okay. Let's say, I'm your bestie. You're best. And let's say I was single. And I said to you, I'm never going to meet my person. What would you say to me?

My friends say that to me. But I'm like, no, we just have to leave L.A. That's dad. I'm dead. Okay, let's not say that. No, but your best friend, you truly are like, how could you not find someone? You are absolutely stunning and perfect. So then there you fucking go.

Like, you would say that to your best friend without it. questioning it. So you have to be able to say that to yourself. Why do you know it for her not for you? What makes you so special? I'm sorry, you're not that special, bitch. There are eight billion people on this planet. Like, there's going to be someone for you. There's no way there's not. It's so true. They're finding love in prison. Like, we have to, we have to. Even the most psycho deranged men are getting married in prison. You guys, I'm telling you, this book is changing my life. Like, truly. I'm like sitting here quoting it to her. I literally love it. Okay, let's play a spicy game. Okay, we are going to rapid fire some dating questions and you will give us your

spicy take. Great. Double text, confident or desperate. Desperado. You're busy. You out work to do. You're getting your nails done. You take a soul cycle class for all I fucking care. No. Never at all. Okay. If you wanted to, if you would. Sex on the first date, does it matter? So you can absolutely have sex on the first date. When I had sex on the first day, I would be a fucking mess the next day. I'd be obsessed, the oxytocusing rippling through my veins or just be like he's the love of my life. It really clouded my judgment. I don't think you having sex on the first date with a man is going to make him like you less. I don't. I don't think it's going to change anything because if it's your person, it's going to work out regardless. But I do

think it will affect you negatively. If you can fuck without feelings, good for you. I personally can't. So I would say wait. Also, you don't know them. First date is kind of crazy. It's like they're inside of you. That is a very intimate space. It's very close. It's spiritual. It's a little too close. We're forming a sole tie here. Right, exactly. What date would you say then to put that on the table? I think third is better.

But again, you have to go at your pace. Dating apps. Necessary evil or delete them immediately. Absolutely necessary. And could we stop saying they're evil? They're a tool. Stop saying anything. I want everyone to remove negative words rounding dating now.

No more. You're let to feel frustrated because feelings are temporary to go away. No more saying evil. No more saying bad, terrible, terrible place to date. No more. What's your favorite dating app for the women to be on nowadays? I was on Hinge. Hinge. I think so, too. Soft launch, tacky or cute?

I think it's cute. I do. Why not? I love a soft launch and a hard launch. I love a soft launch and a hard. Love. So excited. Love. What's the most underrated green flag? Laughter. Like, that has to be, like, that was to me. Like, number one was safety, feeling safety me myself. And number two is laughing. Like if I'm not laughing, I'm out of here. It's underrated. I don't think that we think about that, but it's so important. You don't, you want to be serious? I want to laugh. Oh, wait. Okay. We already is, if he wanted to actually true. Yes. Yes.

Should you ever go back to an ex? She has no idea what she's talking to here. I'm like, I'm the queen of going back to my exes. Please say yes. Have you gone to that chapter yet? No. Your ex is spoiled. your ex is spoiled milk okay tell me and you know what the thing about spoiled milk is when you put back in the fridge it doesn't get fresh again what about revisiting someone that you kind of were seeing things didn't work out you go back i think that tons of people get back together with their exes but i think that when they get back together with their exes they're coming as two new versions of themselves it's not like we had a toxic breakup and then like three months later he's like i went to one therapy session like I'm healed like they're coming back to each other like literally like

completely at a new place and because they wanted to change for themselves so yes it totally can work but what's what's the reason you know what I mean that's so true it's so true okay how long is too long without defining the relationship three months is way too long way too long but that's where I would might absolutely cut it off like typically and I talk to so many of my friends about it like Everyone who's in a really healthy relationship, like, you almost didn't even have to define it. Like, it just happens. Like, it's cute or like, but it's not something you're ever obsessing about because you're feeling so secure. The defining, the whole defining the relationship thing only happens when you're not feeling good.

And if you're not feeling good. The what are we basically? We should start calling it that. What are we? Yeah, that is no, bueno. Okay. If you don't know what you are, then. So true.

I feel like, I'm like, literally, I can't look at her. Is playing hard to get effective? I don't think you should play hard to get. I think you just are hard to get because you're batting and you're prized and you're you have a business. You have a job. You have hobbies, interests. You have friends.

You have a full life. So it's not that you're playing a game. You just happen to be hard to get. You're on your throne. Clip that. If you clip anything. What is one dating rule everyone should break? Okay.

So for me, I was really strict on never dating. younger because I was told you're too intimidating, you're going to be too intimidating for men that are your age and like younger, you have to go older, older, older. And my boyfriend ended up being six years younger than me. I'm really glad. I love a cougar moment. Love that. So we should date younger.

You're saying our boyfriend is just a couple years under. I think you should open up. What are the limitations that you're setting for yourself that you think are like keeping you safe or like preventing you from like whatever but are actually keeping you single? Like the height thing is a big one. Age is a big one. Maybe job. Like what are these like fake things that you're saying?

Well, I could never date a guy that is blue eyes. Why? Mm-hmm. If you want to fuck them, what's the issue? Because it makes me think too, this isn't on here. But even on Hinge, people are setting their age parameter and they're probably missing a bunch. Oh, honey. Think about how many men that I missed out on.

So many. I only set it to a year above me. So I was missing my year and every other year below. It's insane how many guys I was exing out and excluding completely because of this fake thing because maturity obviously in age or not necessarily completely defined. So we should we should expand that. Absolutely. Finish the sentence. You know you're the prize.

When? You treat herself like your best friend. Stop dating people. Did you hear me? Because I think that you need to do that to yourself. This is becoming my therapy session. Thank God she's here. Do you hear me when you treat yourself like a best friend?

Thank you. So if your best friend was fucking going back to her toxic shittiacs or a guy that goes to her, what would you say to her? Absolutely not. Why aren't you doing that to yourself? I would take her phone. So then do it to yourself. Drop it in the ocean. I will.

Okay. Do it for the plot unless. Do it for the plot unless it's going to hurt you in the long run. But do it for the plot. I love it. Serena, thank you so much for coming on Happy Hour. And thank you for giving me a therapy session. Girl, I want update.

DMing you all my questions and letting you know how it's going. Where can we follow you on social media? Serena Caragon on every platform. And you can buy my book, Let's Fucking Date, wherever you get your books. Everyone, go out and buy it, highlight it, annotate it, annotate it. You need to finish it because you got to get to the X chapters. I'm halfway. You got to get to the X's spoiled milk.

I need you to get there. Gosh, I don't want to get to that one. Okay, you guys, you can follow us on Bachelor. Happy Hour, Bachelor Nation, wherever you get your podcast. Make sure you rate review and subscribe, and we will see you next. time. Bye. Bye. Ready for your next adventure?

Etihad's global sale is here. Witness Nairobi's living traditions. Set sail on Phuket's pristine waters. Or let wonder be your guide in Kuala Lumpur. Book by Thursday and take off to over 50 destinations on sale. Travel from October 26 to March 27. Book now at etihad.com. Etihad, beyond borders.

Hey everyone, it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rudd, Michael Boubley, Seth Myers, and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters, like Alex and Asgen-Nerl. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone what to do. Okay, well control is a harsh word. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voicemails and giving advice. Listen to Hey Jonas on America's number one podcast network, IHeart.

Follow Hey Jonas and start listening on the free IHeart Radio app today. Hey, Jonas is sponsored by edible arrangements. Order yours today at edible.com. Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Youanu. We're two best friends,

22 years apart, but so close at heart. And I'm Lisa Di Giulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions, and at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all. Now in my 30s,

being the founder of new shoes, good taste is my business. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman. Angel Geratana. Jeremy Colhain.

Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcasts where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween.

He gets right up next to the microphone. I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast. The True Crime Comedy Podcasts all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it. Each week, I bring on an amazing guest. Ooh, I scammed them.

What? I can talk to you for an hour. You're a generational yapper, like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. Start listening to Scam Goddess on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.