Back Side - 11: Facing Our BIGGEST Fears LIVE & Tom's Water Slide Incident & The Man Who Teleported…

Episode Date: June 27, 2024

The lads face the ultimate bravery test as some surprise visitors enter the studio. Tom reveals his near death experience and Lewis has his worst fact ever.If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to see more Backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram, where all you have to do is search Backside. Let's get into it. Who's ranked the bravest? I'd say I'm the bravest. Definitely not.

I don't like it! Oh! No, no, no, yeah! He's right on his hands. Oh, I can't back up. There's a scorpion on my leg. No, you've got... Oh, no! You're such a babby!

I said he was the bravest! Is banana the worst food you can open your mouth whilst eating? Probably, actually. You know what I mean? I got a DM today. Did you? I got a DM saying, hey, D-doid Malfoy Baker.

D-doid? What's that? Scroll. This guy's some absolute well and nutcase. Well, well. Is it Joe? Let's fake it out. Scroll down your own IG feed until you reach August 2017

and find the photo of you knocking out Weller. Obviously, I didn't actually knock him out. We faked the photo. Take a look at which Ballon d'Or winner used to be a big fan of yours. So what did I do? You went on the photo. I went on the photo. This is the photo right here.

They actually have to be good at football, though. It can't just be like a... Well, yeah. Here's the photo. 2017. Yeah. Screenshot. at football though. It can't just be like a... Well, yeah. Here's the photo. 2017. Yeah. Screenshot. There you go.

Went on to likes. I was like, oh, who could it be? This is exciting. I think I'll weed that. If someone's went back and looked at his old likes. Right, can we guess

who it is? Pretty cool. I'm guessing Anthony Joshua. What, future Ballon d'Or winner? What, future Ballon d'Or winner? Wrong sport there, son. Oh, Bellingham liked it. Who's your guess?

It would have been Bellingham. He would have been young in that age, wouldn't he? Future Ballon d'Or, English Bellingham. Seven years ago, eight years ago? Into his footy. Probably just liked weather and was like, yeah, he's all right, the sidekick. Phil Fowler, then.

It's Jude Bellingham. Jude Bellingham. He was 13 then, right? Yeah, 13 years old, the sidekick. Phil Fowlton. It's Jude Bellingham. Jude Bellingham. He was 13 then, right? Yeah, 13 years old. That makes sense. Does he follow you? No. Wait, Jude Bellingham DM'd you saying,

Hello, Dean Jordan. I've also seen a message which I put in the group chat met Tom on the way to the studio at Houston's someone commented on a pitch side video met Tom on the way to a studio at Houston's station earlier today such a weird line

tapped him on the shoulder he didn't seem happy probably shouldn't have you just have a go at someone No I can imagine you'd tap him And he'd be like Oh fuck

Don't touch me It didn't happen Oh it didn't actually happen No Oh okay Oh I thought this was sort of I thought they lied about What so you're telling me

This guy has tapped a random guy On the shoulder Or the same people who comment Going sure you're crying in hell But this one's sort of It seems real That has just reminded me Right

So I was walking obviously i went home for the past week or so uh because of family circumstances so i spent the time back in my ends basically where i know everyone right so i've walked past this guy at the bus stop and i go oh this this guy like i know like he's one of my mates i'm gonna go up to him and i'm gonna go i'm like scare up to him and i'm gonna go i'm like scaring me surprised no all i had was his side profile right he's waiting for the bus he's in a bus shot so i could i'm seeing him through like a glazed window so obviously i'm like okay that's the side profile call so but he can't see me because it's slightly glazed so there's no way that he can see me coming. So I walk past him and I go,

pow. It's just not the person who I thought it was. I've never seen the guy before in his life. And he goes, bearing in mind, there's this old woman next to him, sat in the bus show. You've given a heart attack too?

Yeah, probably. And she was just like, looking at me like, you might have some of the most crazy disabilities I've ever seen. And then I walked off and I went, oh. Well, you did not holster it first.

I kind of just folded the gun out of embarrassment. Wait, did you say anything? No. No, you have to explain what embarrassment. Wait, did you say anything? No. No, you have to explain what you were doing. Did you say anything? I went, oh, you're not who I thought you were. It was that embarrassing that I was like, I actually just, I don't know what to do.

It felt so weirded out. I was like, that might be the worst moment of my life. If it was like a Truman Show kind of vibe and people saw that,. I was like, that might be the worst moment of my life. If it was like, if it was like a, you know, like a Truman show kind of vibe and people saw that, I'd be like, that is the most embarrassing thing I've ever-

Also, you couldn't have just scared them. You went, pow. I thought you were. Yeah, yeah. I told you this yesterday,

so you've heard it, but I can't get over how weird it was. Oh, it is? I was in Five Guys. It wasn't that weird. It's another story related to- You were exaggerating the story at all.

No, it is a bit- It didn't land, so he's gone. No, but I was weirded out by it. Someone's another story you were exaggerating this no it didn't land so he's gone he's gone no but i was weirded out by it because i'm saying why you sat alone yeah it's not that weird is there an anecdote that you've recalled like isn't associated with food no i think your food i think your food memory is like the strongest part of your brain it actually is like right now all i'm thinking about is that cross on you be like where where uh where were you blah blah blah well you know when this event happened or you know like when when the when the it actually is like right now all I'm thinking about is that cross on you where were you

blah blah blah when this event happened or you know like when the king was crowned or what not and he's like no I had a really good fucking chicken salad

on that day when the queen died I was like chips come down with me eating oh my god yeah exactly no but there's some guy

came up to me and was like hi bumped into you again did he go pow that bus stop and then he just kept going on he was so confused Some guy came up to me and was like, hi, bumped into you again. Did he go, pal? Like a bus stop.

And then he just kept going, I was just so confused while I was eating on my own. I was like, I think we should make it common to eat on your own. I think it's quite nice. Do you think Theo eats on his own often because like he's eating outside of normal dinner times?

So like we'd have a meal together and he goes and has an extra meal like an hour later. They'll never know. I actually was eating on my own. He's secretly, you know, telling you he's... I woke up this morning, thank God. And I went...

Great story, that. And I went on the scales. So I thought, oh, this last... This last week... I've been on holiday. I've been on holiday and I've been eating, guys. I've been eating. You're always eating eating there's no difference

back me up here not too hard he's not going to I can't I'm afraid I like to dalvoge yeah but normally especially midweek

I'm actually quite he means indulge yeah anyways I said I feel I feel a bit podgy this morning I feel a bit fat

I said wonder if it represents on the scales in one week I've put on two kg. That's not actually that much. Yes, it is. With water weight. No, every time I weigh myself,

it's always at my lightest in the morning when I've done a massive shit. I got some questions from people who've been listening. About you? Not just about general things that they wanted us to touch on,

so I thought we could rattle through. You look like an inspector. Inspectors wear pitch-high bucket hats. You actually look like you're ready for the summer. I am high bucket hats You actually look Like you're ready For the summer I am ready for the summer

And if you're ready For the summer Subscribe to Backside Am I right? But we're almost on 30,000 subs on Backside So we should say Please subscribe

Keep subscribing guys Come on Because if you don't I will end my life And also if you don't Subscribe by the way We'll actually lose this set Yeah it's slow

We've already lost the lights We'll lose the chair It took Lewis like 12 hours To reassemble what we're can do sort of the video you can comment abuse just subscribe so we have one here um your near-death experiences sorry so anyone's got any near-death experiences i've got a couple well yeah i feel like you're a couple by the way before he says anything yeah definitely i stood on a pebble no it'd be like an asthma attack or something shortly wouldn't it Sideman game no I'm asking

it would be wouldn't it I've never actually had a full blown asthma attack I only have two but one was more in my head you got you were in a K-hole the thoughts in your head

oh sorry well obviously I had a really bad car crash then the other one I was on holiday when I was about 10 and I went down on the water slide

and I wasn't heavy enough to... No, I wasn't heavy enough to get down, so I got stuck in the middle of it. Oh, shit. And honestly, I've never felt... Since then, I've had really bad claustrophobia, but then my dad just had to come down on his knees and bash me out.

Not bash me out. That's not how you finish a water slide That's not how you finish a walk. Tom in the little fucking enclosed thing. Daddy, stop. Stop, daddy, stop. Just need to bash you out, son. And then we'll get you out. This is how we get you out.

We need some lubricant. No, he had to come down. Did he sit on your face? He had to come down. And now we're both stuck in his little arm neck, son. Tom, take control of the arm No basically He had to

I don't know what you were on about It's just an innuendo that doesn't work I meant to say I meant to say grab my arm Everyone was still Take control of the arm Tom take control of the arm I meant to say grab my arm. Everyone was still in one. Take control of the arm. He goes, Tom, take control of the arm. I'd rather say grab my arm as we're going past the digging.

You're like, ah, daddy, stop, stop. And he just goes, bash, and you die. Bash. Your imagination is very interesting. Take control of the arm. At the time, it was a black one as well, the slide. What song is that? So it's completely pitch black.

Sorry. It's completely, it's like the black slide of death. So it's completely. Yeah, so you can't see as you're going through it. You can't see it. Imagine shit. What part of pitch black don't you understand? That must be horrifying.

Yeah, so imagine being 10. And then the man's just bashing you off. Yeah, you're like, dad? Yeah. It's on our trip. You're going with your dad. And obviously because you've gone with your dad, he's made you wear a stony as well. Yeah, so imagine being 10 And then the man's just bashing you off Dad? Yeah And obviously because you've gone with your dad He's made you wear a stony as well Which is even worse Are you sure he's your dad or is he just going

I'm your daddy Yeah, it's flag tunnel I'm here now son I'm your daddy You don't sound like daddy Call me daddy I'm just screaming in this daddy stop daddy stop so then my dad had to come down in his dinghy or whatever and and hit me with

and to get me out why didn't he just put you on your his dinghy. Sorry? Are you, what are you imagining here? It's a pitch black water slide. Yeah. I'm stuck in the middle of it. Yeah. What, what, what do you expect?

You want him to slide down slowly. You shoot down really fast. He like, yes, that's the whole point. That's how he got me out.

Did that not hurt? No, because I'm in a dinghy. Oh, you're in a dinghy as well. Jesus. It'd be a bit thingy definitely near

death if he was just sat there I thought it was like dad coming towards like ahhh no I didn't know he was coming

I didn't know he was on his way down because it's pitch black you are infuriatingly thick I've got one I can't see

anything I stood really close to the speakers at a Chasing Status concert once that was a near-death experience I had one

this one probably you don't even get the joke yeah because you're almost deaf I just didn't like it yeah it wasn't good it's great not one of your best ones

thanks man this one probably won't surprise you but like when when my mum was giving birth to us, I came out and the umbilical cord was

tied around my neck. So like, when it's ended or just then, explains a lot. So like I came out with it. I was like,

that's why you had your brain don't work properly. There's no air properly. That's why you're a mouth breather. Yeah.

They have to like rush me out and like fucking like try and why don't they just cut the umbilical cord around your neck no i don't know like they rush you when something like that happens they just rush you out they don't see out to you like your mom and that and they just fucking wheel you out like well and i'm just there and you're like hey man this is mad i can't fucking breathe like is that how you came out one. This is off the back of the zombies thing

where you said you're quite brave. Who's ranked the bravest in order? I'd say I'm the bravest. You're definitely not. I actually, I would because I'm a bit... I would like to, on braveness, I would like to take us back to the Tottenham vlog. Yeah, Tom is not the bravest.

Tom facing his fear of heights, threatening to attack you and refuse to go down and walk down when little six-year-olds are doing it. I was terrified. I immediately went down looking like a bit of a bitch, but I did it. Yeah. I don't think you're brave.

And you lost at bogeys. Same thing. Who don't play at bogeys? He's not brave, like, yeah, I suppose. Courage. You did, yeah. In the face of danger. You did, when five-year-olds were going down, you walked down the stairs. When it comes to heights, yeah, I'm. Courage. You did, yeah. In the face of danger.

When five-year-olds are going down, you walk down the stairs. When it comes to heights, yeah, I'm not brave at all. Let's see. But when it comes to confrontation, I think you are. Yeah. That's different. No, if I say I had to walk down that to save my life, I'd do it. No, but that doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be life or death stick.

Braveness is just being brave enough to face your fear and do it. But isn't there like, there's braveness in this stupidity. I think you're pretty brave, Lou, because you turn up in clothes like that. I think you're quite brave. I think Theo's a bit right with stupidity as well. Yeah, it's like there's bravery borderline like dumb.

That's what I mean. That's not courage though. That's not bravery. That's ignorance, isn't it? Yeah, I think you're ignorant. I'm not ignorant. I think that's what i mean that's not courage though that's not bravery that's ignorance isn't it yeah i think you're ignorant you're not ignorant i think that's really my mind to be fair when a camera's there i'll do pretty much anything because anything for content really would you actually do you know what i put you first i actually would the only the only person out of the four of us that would be willing to step in a ring is Lewis.

Well, I have. No, you didn't. You've also... People have offered new fights to you and you've gone, oh, no, I don't really like boxing. I'm not really a fighter. Yeah, I've done it. I've done it more than you. What?

I don't think that's true. I think me and you would. I would have. Not now. Yeah, true. I wouldn't now, but... But as it stands, I think... So...

I'll go you first. I'll go you, Reeve, me, Theo. Yeah, I think that's fair. What? It's definitely you, l first. I'll go you, Reeve, me, Theo. Yeah, I think that's fair. What? It's definitely you, lads. I'm definitely more brave than... People like to take the piss at me, but I do more shit than any of you.

Well, I have got a great way to find this out today. So, I have arranged for someone to come in and test our fortitude and braveness. Now? Oh, no, if it's spiders. If it's spiders, I'm not doing it. I'm not telling you anything about what anything is. What's in the hat?

What's in the hat? Nothing's in the hat. I'm not worried. If you listen to this, I have a hat with, I'm not doing it. I'm not telling you anything about what anything is. What's in the hat? What's in the hat? Nothing's in the hat. I'm not worried. If you listen to this, I have a hat with an assortment of notes. Please, everyone, take one note from the hat.

Just remember, we put you first. Don't look at it. Don't look at it. Don't look at it. Remember, I got put last in the bravery test.

Everyone, don't look at it. If I get anything to do with spiders, I'm out. I actually don't need to fucking do a spider. But isn't spiders

not actually bravery, though, is it? Yeah, it's fear. Right. So. Also, could I point out immediately. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Because they are bricking it over.

Instantly. This is why I asked this. Why is there a camera now pointing at us? Already, already, already I can put me and Lewis first and second because you are worried about a piece of paper old talk as soon as we're faced with something

so much but there's a difference between bravery and spite so what we have is a man next door with an assortment

of animals and insects oh no that's okay that's okay I'm not doing it written on one of these notes everyone has to do it written on one of these notes

is a different animal. No, I swear to God. Yes, come on. We all will need to hold the animal that we have here. Okay, that's fine. Spider, spider. How long for? He's the twist, he's the twist.

I need a wig. This is unreal. Nice. He's the twist. So we can look at our paper, but we can't tell anyone what our animal is. And if you want, you can try and persuade someone to exchange you with it. Can we look at our paper, but we can't tell anyone what our animal is And if you want you can try persuade someone to exchange you with them Can we look at it now?

There's- not yet. There's terrible animals and there's less terrible animals that are nice But surely that's subjective? Yeah, it's subjective So a snake wouldn't bother me, but it probably would bother him So let me emphasize when you try to convince you can't say it, you can't give any clues I don't- no one ruin it. Just say it. All right. No adjectives describing it. I won't, I know. This is good.

So everyone, have a look secretly at what you've pulled. Oh, interesting. Interesting. How long do we have to spend time in it? Everyone's had a look. So would anyone like to try

and convince someone to swap with you? How long do we have to spend time with this? I don't really know what mine is. Mine's fine. So if someone wants mine. Mine's not great. I'll swap with you if you want. I don't know if mine's good or not.

I can't lie. I think mine's the worst. If you genuinely think that, I'll swap with you. But I don't believe you Well if you If you think yours is the worst And ours are better No because

There is one worse than mine That for me That doesn't make any sense then No like Objectively mine's the worst Okay But for me It's not the worst

Well I'll take it then If you want Well what have you got That's fine Well you said they were good And less good I'm not going to lie They're all shit But some are less shit Oh right good and less good. I'm not going to lie.

They're all shit, but some are less shit. All right, well. Now, this one's... I'm not... No one's getting a rabbit. Let's say it that way. Okay, okay. You know what I mean? That's fine.

No, I've got a really bad one. I don't know how bad mine is. So I don't know whether to swap. That's my favourite thing ever. If you want to swap, you can. It's completely up to you. No, no, no. Swear on your life.

No, swear on my life, yeah. It's all right. all right yeah well for me it would be no what is it yeah the thing is with spider it's only you and tommy was scared of them that's true so like that's true that's why i think he might have spider for anyone that's mine's fucking awful the opportunity here to swap is that here mine's so bad swap it then swap it swap is the here. Mine's so bad. Swap it then. Swap it. Swap it with me and I'll swap with that.

There's no, once you swap once, there's no re-swap. For me, this outgoes, okay? Worst would be Spider Tarantula, okay? Second worst is this. So then you haven't got the worst?

Lads, no, but I also don't want to go Spider. So I'm sort of like, I'm safe betting this. Oh, I can't even think about what I'm about to do. I'll swap, I'll swap.

You'll swap it with Theo. Okay. No, no, no. You swear on your mum's life that you don't have spider. I swear, well I swear, yeah. I don't have spider. You can't, there's none of this mum's life stuff. You can't get any clues.

It's about bluff and trust, man. Are you happy with yours? I, well, I have the advantage. I organise this. So you know everything. Yeah. And it's about bluff and trust, man. Are you happy with yours? I have the advantage. I organise this. So you know everything. Yeah. And there's basically seven in total. And there's one that I didn't want desperately.

And I don't have that one. Are you just going to make a swap? Or are you going to stick? I am not up for sale. I promise you, this is not that bad. I'm not up for sale. Have it out of the hat. You just said it was the worst and promised you it's not that bad.

Well, I'm going to have to lock it off. No, no, no. Go swap, please. I ain't swapping. Swap out the hat, then. off up sale you just said it was the worst and promise you it's not that bad well i could have to lock it off no no no go swap please i ain't swapping swap out the hat then no because someone should do this one i just said i'll swap no i don't trust you all right fine because you've got that dodgy smirk on your face here we go so there's no changing we're not all going to reveal we'll reveal one at a time as we're coming in. I'll reveal mine first. My heart's racing. I can't lie. My heart is racing. So the animal that I have is a giant rat.

That's fine. That's fine. That's basically you. I know it's a less bad. I'm quite happy. I don't know how giant this is. How did you get your mum down here? I've seen...

Well, mine's a giant as well. I've got a giant millipede. Oh! Oh, no! That is the one I didn't want. That's fine. We weren't going to reveal this. Wait, I thought you said we weren't fucking revealing.

I literally said don't reveal it. They're not that bad. That is the grimest thing you'll ever see in your life. See if yours. That is awful. No, that is horrendous. Don't you see what yours is? Tom, that is, if you don't like spiders,

you will not like this. That is the one I desperately didn't fucking want. Oh, well, we'll find out. Oh, Tom. We'll find out. Right. I don't know. They've just got loads of legs.

Nah. Nah. Nah, wait until you see it. How big are they? It's an alien. It's not real. It's an alien. Hello. Hi.

Hello, mate. Do we have a giant rat? Yes. Do we have a giant rat? Yes. Can we grab a giant rat please? No, it's not in there. You haven't got it in there have you? John, mate. Oh my god, no I don't like this actually. Move very slowly. What do I do? If they bite, they can't damage themselves. Oh, that's cute. That's not that bad.

That's nothing. Oh! That's cute. Oh, you're scratchy! Stop making loud noises. Now, put your hands out. Are you going to hold it? Yeah.

Oh, that's cute. Oh, he's actually quite nice. Yeah, that's fine. Oh, look. Can you give a poo on you? Oh. Hello. Yeah. Oh, that's cute. Oh, he's actually quite nice. Yeah, that's fine. Oh, look. He'll give a poo on you. Hello. Oh, that tail, though. Oh, you quite...

Oh, I got the nice one. He's a sensei. Oh, hello. Do you want to talk to the mic? Are you all out of here? No, no, no. No, no, no. Oh, my God.

Careful. Good catch, good catch. I don't know how to hold rats. Can it use its tail as a weapon? No. Look at him. He's quite lovely oh i def by the way i'm so if you listen to this i have definitely got the best one by far by far the rest on this list were awful yeah he's lovely yeah he's lovely him look at him i thought he

was going to be like no he's not it's been handled He's a very, very funny guy. He's done lots of films and movies. Is he the one out of Harry Potter? Not the original one. Oh, he's shouting at me. Oh! That is real lucky. Oh, he shouts at me. I am the bravest.

Yeah, that's me. I'll have a leg in. Oh! Yeah, that's me confirmed as top boys! Thank you very much. Next up, can we have a giant millipede, please? I thought they would be bigger. That's fine. It's him.

It was like a toothbrush. Who's going? It's me. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. It's him. So if you're listening to this, it has a million legs.

If you're listening to this. 87 pairs of legs. 87 pairs of legs. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Right, 30 seconds starts now. Oh, fuck off. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Look at his pincers. Is it poisonous? Well, yes, they are. But you must wash your hands off. Go on, Tom. Because they give off a form of sun. Oh, my God.

Look at the way its legs move. It's like a wave. Yeah, that's pretty cool. Can you get it down my arm please? I don't like it there. Get your shit down my arm. Oh Jesus. Oh my god, it's got shit on you. It's got shit on you. Go shit.

Shall I go wash my hands? Go wash your hands. Alright, thanks. Reeve, what animal do you have? I have a tarantula. Hard luck. What? You've got a tarantula. Oh! Oh! Oh, hard luck. What? You got a tarantula. Wait, is that the worst?

No, I think mine's the worst. See that, mate? Look at you, look at Theo. That wasn't that bad. I'm gonna get away from you for this one. No, I'm gonna put it here. No, no, no, Reeve, it's not funny. No, no, no, Theo.

No, you've got to sit here. Theo, be brave. Theo, no, no, no, you have to sit there. We've all done that. You have to sit there. You have to. You have to. I'm not gonna move No, no, no, you have to sit there, man. You have to sit there. We've all done that. You have to sit there. You have to. You have to. You have to.

I'm not gonna move it, am I? What you gonna do? Throw it on ya. Fucking no, you big babby. No, no, no, legit, I don't want, no. Remember when- No, can you stop, Ollie? Please.

Do you admit you're not the bravest? Yeah, I admit it. Fine, whatever. He walks away, he's like, no, no, ho, ho, I'm the bravest. I run marathons, I'm brave. I have physical challenges. No, look at him.

There's nothing brave about running a marathon. Oh, no. marathons, I'm brave. I have physical challenges. Now look at him. There's nothing brave about running a marathon. Oh no. Oh my God. Stare, Stare, Theo stare. You have to stare. Ollie, can you not be a dick? So if you're listening,

they are bringing in the tarantula now. I'm slightly scared of this. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. It's him. Can you hold the box? No, no, we kind of, do I have to? Can I be bitten by one?

Fucking hell. No, no, you have to steer. You have to steer. I'm a little bit nervous. You have to steer. No, no, Theo, oh wait, man. It's the video. Get in.

Theo, you're not in by your mate. Are you serious? No, he's joking, you idiot. I just opened that big. Look at the side of the new fangs. Oh, oh. Go on, Reeve. Good lad. It's not even that big. Look at the side of the new fangs. Oh. Oh. Oh. Go on, Reeve.

Good lad. Good lad. He's a five-star fella. Good lad, Reeve. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It is right on his hand and his fucking...

Do you mean it's not too bad? You do it. Fuck that. Go on. Oh, it's sticking to my... Go on, Tom. Go on. No.

No. I don't want to see him. Thank you so much. I fucking hate spoilers. Oh, my God. Everyone's passed so far. You guys are really brave. Theo, who have you got?

I've got a koala bear. I think I know. It's called koala. Oh, God. That fucking tarantula stinks. Oh, look at that. It's called koala. Oh, God. The fucking tarantula stinks. Oh, look at that. It says a dog. What is it really?

Snake. Oh! No, can you... So I've done this before. I actually was really scared. Oh, shut up. Oh, shut up. I can't smell the box.

No, they're the... Ah, fuck. Is snake the worst? Oh, he's not that bad. Oh, shut up! I can't smell the box. No, they're the... Ah, fuck. Is the spider... Is Snake the worst? Aw, he's not that bad. No, he's cool. Oh, he looks horrendous.

I don't know, he's cool. If you're listening, it's a bright red snake. Oh my god. This is called a milk snake. Okay, just one second. No, I won't... Excuse me, being on your mind. Look how scared he is.

You be a tree. Be the tree. It's not venomous, Jay. Be the tree. Be the tree, Theo. Mate, if it's not venomous, it, Theo. Look at the way it's like... Be the tree. Be the tree.

Be the tree, man. It's the end of the thing. I can't touch it. I can't touch it. You have to. I'll hold him. No, no, no, Theo, you have to. You've got this. I'm really panicking. No, no, I believe. Hang on. I'll do it.

Let someone else do it first. I'll hold him. Don't let it go. There you are. Look, it's fine. Hang on. I'll do it. Let someone else do it first. I'll hold him. Don't let it go. I've got a little surprise. There you are. Look, it's fine. It's fine, Theo. Look.

What surprise? Oh, that's insane. Can I do that? That's a surprise. No, no, no, no, no. Okay, I'll do the snake. Get fucked. He's got a fucking scorpion out.

He's just got a scorpion out. I'll do the snake. I won't do that. Okay, I'll do it. Do you want the snake then? I'll hold the snake. I'll do the- You didn't do the scorpion. I ain't doing the scorpion. I'll do the snake, I won't do that. Okay, I'll do the snake then. I'll hold the snake. You can do the scorpion. I ain't doing the scorpion. I'll do that, I'll do it like Harry's doing.

Right, Theo, if you do this, I'll do the scorpion. Theo, if you do it, I'll do the scorpion. You might just keep your arms still. He's just licked it. Oh, oh my God, oh my God. Yeah, you're doing it, Theo. It's done, it's done, it's done. No, you're doing it, Theo.

30 seconds. Where's he going? No, that does not count, Theo, it's 30 seconds. It's 30 seconds it's done, it's done. No, you're doing it. No, Theo, where's he going? No, that does not count, Theo. It's 30 seconds. It's 30 seconds. Give me that. That's insane. Mate, he's making you look a right knobby. He's got it around his face.

Oh wow, I'm feeling soft. Oh, hang on, he's falling a bit. Don't put your dog around that. Two minutes, come on. Oh, whoa. Keep it still, mate. You're like a tree, right? Bearing in mind, you're like a tree. Like going on my hand. Feel that, how weird's that? Shut up. Oh, it. Come on. Oh, whoa. Keep it still, mate. You're like a tree, right? Bear in mind, you're like a tree.

Feel that? How weird is that? Oh, it's slimy. Why are you slimy? Oh, he's licking me. Is that how they smell? That's easy. Theo, this one's fun, like. I've definitely got to take a photo of that, mate. I'll do the scorpion if Theo does the snake for 30 seconds.

Yeah, do the snake properly. No, you haven't take a photo of that, mate. I'll do the scorpion if Theo does the snake for 30 seconds. Yeah, do the snake properly. I've done the snake for 30 seconds. No, you haven't, mate. Come on, it's about being brave. You haven't done it properly, man. Tom, it's about this. We've all done ours. I'll tell you what, round the neck.

Go on, round the neck. Go on. Go on, he'll do the scorpion, he said. Round the neck. Yeah, good. If I take it off of you, get it off, then. I also will. Yeah, but it's got to be at least five seconds.

Oh, wait, you have to make it last a bit. It's not even moving. It's not even moving. It's not even moving. It's not even moving. You're such a babby. Who said he was the brave? Who thought he was the brave? He thinks the scorpion's gonna-

He's by far and away the least brave here. I don't really want- Theo, you've got this. Theo, no, you've got this, man. Theo, it's fine. Theo, you have it. You've got this, you've got this. Yeah, you've got this.

Yeah, no, you're good, you're good. Wow, it's a- Yeah, it's there there. It's there there. Oh no, oh no. He's going- Okay, you got this. Yeah, no, you're good. You're good. You're good. Oh, yeah. Stay there. Oh no. He's going. Okay, Lewis.

Excuse me. Can I get off please? He's going for the neck. There's a scorpion on my leg. There's a scorpion on my leg. Come on, man. Actually, there's a scorpion on my leg. Oh, mate.

That's not. Oh no. That was the craziest shit I've ever done. That around the neck was weird. Wasn't that crazy? Put it around the neck then. All right, yeah. Yeah, I'll go around the neck. We're just leaving this here then.

One of the only creatures that enjoy being handled, John Warmblood is his elbow. Oh. And you can have the scorpion in your hand, can't you? Go on, Lou. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is he sting though? No, but if he does, you won't hurt him, so put your hands flat.

They won't. No, they won't do it. I know, I know. He's not strong enough to do it. Oh, my God. He's connected to me. Oh, he's connected. That's it.

Oh, that is... Oh, God. It's going quite a fucking way, isn't it? Lads, I'm holding a scorpion. That is sick. Where's he going? Right, okay. Well done.

Well done. I don't think I'll ever be able to do I'm a celebrity. Get me out of here. I don't think you'll be invited able to do I'm a celebrity. Get me out of here. I don't think you'll be invited. Yeah, I don't think you'll be asked, mate. I don't think you're on that list, mate. Brilliant. That was brilliant.

That was amazing. Thank you so much. What was the other animal we didn't get to see? Or was that we'd seen? A penguin. Oh, a green blue tongue. What's that?

What's that? Yeah, bring the blue tongue. How many did you hold in the end? The rat and the scorpion and the snake. Three. I held three. Nice. I did the snake, which was the worst.

No, it wasn't. The snake was by far the best. No, the rat and the snake were the best. I locked my hands up. I fucking hate this shit. The snake was cool, man. Yeah, the snake was cool. It was, and it kind of slid.

Round my neck, I was like, that scared me going a bit. What's a blue tongue? What's that? We're about to find out, man. Why are you nervous? I didn't like it. Why are you more nervous? I scared me going a bit. What's a blue tongue? What's that? We're about to find out, man. Why are you nervous? Why are you more nervous? I'm not an arm song.

Did you just touch your cock? No, I was just... Oh, that's sick. Oh, wicked. We have some dinosaurs in the studio, people. We have lizards. Oh, wow. Who's going to hold a bearded?

Yeah, how do you do it? I'll hold the bearded. This is cold. Mate, it's like fucking armour. It's like armor. Like the snake, but bigger. Yeah. I wanna feel him.

Right, do you wanna pass this along? I'm right. I'll hold that. No, come on, Theo. You hold this one, it's fine. Honestly, it's fine. Mate, that's a really cool feeling. Stop telling me, honestly.

That's a really cool feeling. Oh, yeah. You want one now, don't you? Can we give this one to Theo? No, no, it's okay. Theo, you're fine. No, no, no, honestly, it's fine. Please.

Oh, he's fucking sick. Yeah, it's cool, isn't it? Can I have a go of him? The top skin is unreal. Can I have a go of the bearded one? Yeah, you can do, yeah. He's just... Yeah, chuck him over.

Thanks, mate. Everyone's just having a go if you're listening to this. And Theo is... Whoa! How sick is that? What's the meaning of this guy's life? What's the meaning of your life's life? What's the meaning

of your life? Like, what does he do? He eats stuff. What do you do? Thank you very much. That was brilliant. Thank you. I'll bring one up.

A black panther. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I imagine one of them was a panther. Yeah, man. Thanks, bro. Thank you.

You know what? I feel like if it's like a big cat, I'd be less scared. No, you wouldn't. No, you're so... If he brought a... Oh, no, he's giving it the ticket.

If he brought a fucking lion... As soon as he unlocks the room, he's like... No, no, if he brought a lion in, I'd be more terrified than anything we just saw. A hundred percent. It's a fucking lion. So, lads... It's fucking handy.

So, as soon as he leaves... Yeah, I just fucking punch a lion, mate. As soon as he leaves with the fucking reptiles, he goes, I'd prefer a polar bear so the reason I got us to rank us beforehand let's re-rank

after that experience I'd stay with that ranking I'd move myself down really I pussied out the tarantula millipede oh I didn't do the tarantula but I'll go first then

I got you first thanks mate if you did the tarantula I would put you but also there's no way that he could be above you based on the reactions

before we even started. He didn't even know what was going on. He went, oh, come on. So I guess it goes, Reeve, me, Tom. Yeah, definitely. Other flaws.

Me and you were like that. Yeah, yeah. I'll really enjoy that. I'm shaking. Are you actually? Yeah, I'm shaking after that. You fucking held a snake. I don't like it.

You only held one animal out of that entire thing. You were such a... I didn't wrap it around my neck. Hold your hand up and say, I am Theo Baker. I am a bitch. I don't like it. You only held one animal out of that entire thing. You are so cute. I had it wrapped around my neck. Hold your hand up and say, I am Theo Baker. I am a bitch. Yeah, yeah. Straight into the camera, man.

I am Theo Baker, and I had the snake almost kill me around my neck. I literally had the snake longer around my neck as well. He's added that to his near-death experiences now, hasn't he? Yeah, legit. Mate, I don't like that. Had a snake around his neck for 10 seconds. He went, I can't breathe. Honestly, it's's fine It's fine

Not honestly Anyone losing it? I might rather do that Tottenham jump thing Ten times than that again Yeah the Tottenham jump This is exactly what we just said When you weren't in the room

As soon as the actual fear Is out of place Yeah no Fuck you I'm a big boy again When there's fear involved You see Straight back to giving it

The big one And then nothing happens as if he wasn't hiding behind his chair I didn't want to hold any of them animals really I don't like that

yeah no he liked it no fucking no this is the whole point that's by definition the point of why he organised it this is the whole point of bravery and fear

nobody do you think I wanted to hold a snake no but I did it to see it he looked like he did what I did want to hold I've never held a snake before it's okay I've to hold a snake? No, but I did it to see it. He looked like he did. What?

I did want to hold it. I've never held a snake before. It's okay. I've never held a snake before and that was a fucking awesome feeling. Did no one hold the scorpion? Other than you, no. I feel like he was more nervous about the scorpion. He had it on my hand

and it was there five seconds and then it started going weird. Do you notice how on your leg after about five seconds pulled it off? Yeah, on my hand it was there and then I seen him moving down he was like right that's enough

do you see his cuts all over his hand yeah that'd be from all the animals he handles well but I'm glad that he passed the scorpion over to

you yeah I think like out of everyone that you know there's least value in dying we'll give it to them yeah so please subscribe if you

enjoyed that and if you want us to bring something weirder back so Theo can face off a panther. Do you know what? Please subscribe and we'll do it. I guarantee you now there's zero chance there's anything else that he brings in.

He wouldn't even hold a rat. I can't listen to him anymore. Nah, yeah. Honestly, I hate that every minute. I've lost a little bit of respect for the boy. Have you though? A little bit. I think it's hilarious how quick he went to give it in.

Only because prior you were like, how can I be the least brainy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How is that fucking possible? Do you know how many marathons I ran? It's a good job we had it on vlog because if we were using these cameras, you wouldn't be in any of the shots.

That's why we had to be. I have to hold that right now. And I will. All right boys, good work for us. Yeah, good work. Yeah, good work. I'll learn from this. As if you didn't hold the rat.

He was so nice. The rat was the cutest. He was on my shoulders sniffing me. He was like, he's so nice. I don't get people who hate rats. I think they're quite cute. I don't mind them, but.

Oh, oh my God. Oh, he's eating a kid. What do you know? Right, so Lewis, I want some facts, please. Well, sing us in, Theo, if your voice isn't quivering. Lewis, I had some weird facts today. Not a single one he's got right since we started that jingle. Come on, then.

I want the most mental. I think I've got a stress headache. I want the most mental that you believe. This one. This one, because the thing is, I actually have proper fucking knowledge on this, because I'm a space time travel nerd. So man invents time travel.

Say that again. Man invents time travel. So time travel exists. Yeah, you're not seeing Dark Matter? That's not time travel. That's space travel. Go on. It's like universe travel, isn't it?

So let me take you back to the year 1995. The year before I was born. The 1995. Is that like a new band? Yeah. It's peaceful, it's nice. People go to the arcades, chilling. It's a time for scientific progress.

You know, you're making tellies and that. Was the internet out then? I think tellies have been out 30 years, but yeah, go on. Either way, they're making progress and stuff. Oasis were the biggest band in the world. Anyone else smell rat poo? Someone's got cyanide on his hand. Yeah, that is pretty bad.

I can smell human poo coming from... And there's a guy called Mike McCrum. Mike McCrum? Mike McCrum is a bit of a... What can I say? A genius. He's ahead of his time. Like you. Yeah. And he's ahead of his time like you and he yeah

yeah and he's saying things that people would have said yeah you crazy and he yeah you crazy you're crazy man you know mike down the block always doing crazy stuff much like bob lazar when he was making his yeah true yeah and we all know what happened with him yeah i don't know he went to ask us he went to space he didn't go to space. He went to Area 51 and exposed it. I'll tell you about it one day. Okay, thank you. And he invented something called the Jacob's Ladder.

Now, I know what you're thinking. Why did he call it a chick? No, Mike McCrum. He invented the Jacob's Ladder, and I know what you're thinking. I don't know why he called it the Jacob's one if he's the inventor. It should be the Mike ladder, which we shall refer to as.

He found it. At least fucked it. Oh, never mind. Okay, so he made this thing, right? So essentially, if he threw something through it, it would disappear and appear somewhere else. A wormhole. So it was like some sort of wormhole teleportation thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was like, okay, this is teleportation yeah yeah yeah and he was like okay this is fucking mental almost like a water slide where at the bottom you come out on a dinghy

but like 200 metres down yeah wait so has he has he like has anyone else seen him do it or has he just said no this is just

a low scale stuff he's doing and now he's so now he well I know but I've got a question where is the exit point of the wormhole

at the beach no it's actually the beach of things no but also lewis lewis no no no no so he's in his house and he throws something for a hole and then everything he throws for a hole ends up on the beach down the road if his house his house is on the beach and he's just throwing it through the hole something like that which explains all the rubbish you find on the beaches. That is true.

That is true. Has he, like, any of his mates seen him do it or is he just all saying it? It's a law skills thing. He's like, sort of a bit of a lawner guy. Oh, so he's made it up?

No, no, no. Don't be sceptical about Lewis's facts. We've established that every single one is true so far. This is well-researched facts. But you could just say,

like, guys, by the way, yesterday I... No, no, no. Think about it. If you invented teleportation, you're not going to tell... Exactly, yeah.

It's a dangerous thing. You keep that to yourself. Yeah. If I tell you that, what's going to happen? Because I'd want to jump through it and then I'd risk my own life at that point

and you just don't want to do that. Could it not be like, you know, like the Grinch? He's got that, like, slide that goes from the top of the mountain down to...

Flatland? I did explore Here's a question which you're probably like the Grinch. He's got that, like, slide that goes from the top of the mountain down to... Flatland? I did explore that possibility. Here's a question, which you're probably going to get onto. What kind of items does he throw in through this wormhole? Huh? What kind of items does he throw in through it? Rocks, and then as you're throwing through the wormhole, they go out the window and then onto the beach.

Like coins. Like paper aeroplanes. Coins and all sorts of things. Well, the thing is, it does have quite a good... It's based in money. It does have, like, a practical use, if you think about it. It's like, you have rubbish, rubbish Like you just want to throw it out Yeah yeah yeah

So it goes on the beach Yeah yeah Well people are doing it anyway That's what I'm saying Well that's what I'm saying So he's using So he's using the wormholes To flight it

Yeah yeah So he's established That he's basically created Space and time travel And the first thing he's doing Is chucking away old rubbish Well you would do that As well as research Practical use Practical use I could change the face of the earth Now I'm going to flight it No he's doing is chucking away old rubbish. Well, you would do that as well as research, wouldn't you?

Practical use, practical use. I could change the face of the earth. No, I'm going to flight it. No, he's doing it all. I can't believe it. I've thrown a McDonald's wrapper through this wormhole, went to the beach the other day. It's there! But you would do that.

You'd be doing research and then see you had a wank and you have a tissue. You just throw it through, get it out of the way. What the f- Anyways, erm- You spunk into the wormhole and it lands in the field. What the fuck? Suncream, innit? So he starts coming up with a prototype to make a bigger one,

because Mike decides, I want to go through the wormhole. Yeah. I want to see what I can do with it. It only gets to the beach, though. Well, yeah, but then if you can control it, where else can you go? Yeah, true. So he decides he wants to make a bigger one

that he could go through but whispers start going about the neighbourhood as you see he must have told a few of his mates yeah had a few beers

and like a bit of rubbish turned up on the beach what's going on you're at the pub with your mate and he goes yeah man

just invented fucking space travel yeah his mates come around and go fucking hell mate we've seen all of your brown letters on the beach

what's going on here yeah addressed to Mike McCrum I thought you I thought you were to be evicted last week i've just seen it on the beach yeah oh no who's that the egyptians are back the egyptians fbi secret service at the door gets arrested brought in for questioning for what what's he up to what is he up to? There's loads of noise out in the garden.

Neighbours are complaining that he's making this big construction. You know, things are disappearing. No, but they're not disappearing because you said they're going on a video.

Well, when neighbours are watching, he's throwing things through and they just disappear. Oh, yeah, of course. What's Barry down the road doing? A mic down the road doing? Yeah, what's his mic? So he was interviewed

and one of the questions he was asked when he was explaining what he's doing is like of doing he's like right if you if you would teleport what would you bring with you anyways and he says well my cell phone you had cell phones back then not phones um anyways he got released there's not really much that they can arrest him for you wait were there cell phones in yeah like the bricks they came in yeah so you can't really arrest him for, you know, creating teleportation.

There's not really a law on that. So he gets released, right? And then a month later, he's missing. No one has any idea where Mike is. He's jumped through the thing, hasn't he?

And he's never been found. But he would have landed at the beach. At the beach, there's a massive steel pipe, a massive steel pipe, and inside, a thorn, right?

And that's all was ever found, and that's the last ever seen of him. So you're suggesting that, like... He did it. Like, human matter tissue can't be transported. No, I'm saying, where did he go? Oh, he's... What? He did.

So with this, when they transfer, they don't necessarily go to the beach. They might go somewhere else and then go to the beach. If you go through a wormhole, and then you can spout over there. So Mike has went through it. This has went over there and he might have been taken elsewhere. Okay, if I was holding the phone. So why is his phone?

Yeah, why is his phone there and he's not? That's all that they found of him, but he did it. So who told this story, Lewis? Just some research. No, no, no, no, no, no. Who told this story? So you're suggesting so you're suggesting because obviously uh wormhole is still probably open if it's not he's gone through it and

patched it up as he's going through it cut off he no i think he's got he's closed the door behind him he might have he might have figured out how to decide where he's gone like that was a prototype at the beach he might have found out how to go and before we start laughing about time travel time travel is a proven thing that works inside you can only go forward i can explain time travel to you right now this is how it works you can only go forward you can't go backwards not necessarily you can go backwards if you can travel speed alike so this is for forward right okay so imagine every second that ticks i'm doing this i'm like wanking off a big cock if you're listening okay and then time travel time travel is, imagine I'm doing this,

but I'm on a wheelie chair and you're pushing me left to right. So it starts looking like that. Yeah. Now that is a longer, that wave is a longer distance than just that. Although they're both a second. So if you're watching me go left to right, I'm actually moving slower, but I'm actually moving at the same time. Nice.

So that's how time travel works going forward. So like me doing that, I will age like a third of the time of you. But how do you- Looking from the outside of that. No, that's how it works. Lewis, practically, how would it work in a practical sense though?

So that's how it works in Interstellar. I want to know how this wormhole has not been discovered. And who's told the story? Yeah, yeah. If he's... Where's Mike? How does anyone know about Mike if he's gone missing? Got a picture of him?

I'll tell you what's happening. Are you about to bring him in now? Who wants to hold him? No, he's real. Is this a film you watched? No, this is a real guy. He had long hair down here. They found like sketches of like the construction. Wait, he had long hair down here they found like sketches of

like the construction wait lewis had long hair like crazy glasses yeah it couldn't have just been he went down to the beach he pissed fell in the sea and drowned there's there's a lot more to life than you just know by the way if you just believe in everything like the government hide stuff area 51 they have alien spaceships like there's happening that we don't know about i know but my point is who's telling this story well where's mike so in depth where's mike who knows all there's records of him going to the police station mike mccrum searching more maybe they actually have you ever thought actually maybe he didn't just disappear for the wormhole the fbi took him in and now he works for the fbi well this is exactly this this is what happened with

bob lazar so bob lazar was building rocket ships on his fucking garden and they hired him at area took him in and now he works for the FBI well this is exactly this is what happened with Bob Lazar so Bob Lazar was building rocket ships on his fucking garden and they hired him at area 51 and then he started grassing about

element 51 and then the 55 and then they got rid of him and he has a little secret stash of this element

which is space ship fuel you should watch it's quite an interesting how do you know Bob Lazar he said oh he's not dead no no he's making around he gets hushed all the time like that people he gets harassed by like the officers and police he is this probably the strongest guy

for any alien stuff but it's like is he either the world's greatest liar well his story's never changed once yeah i don't believe this so much because people say that, but it probably has changed a bit. But elements of what he was saying in the 70s have been proven true now though, right? So on what? They've admitted to the aircrafts and that. No, they don't. And the little alien.

And the little Mexican alien. No, no, no. They've admitted to... They don't know what they are. They don't say it's alien or anything. But well, that's what it is. If we don't know what it is, that's the definition of an alien. The thing for Bob Lazar is, back then, do you know you have fingerprints now? Yeah, exactly. Back are they don't say it's alien or anything but well that's what it is if you don't know what it is that's the definition of an alien

the thing for Bob Lazar is back then do you know you have fingerprints now yeah exactly back then you didn't have it they had these things where bone scanners yeah bone scanners

and that was unheard of technology and he referenced it way back then and now like we know that they had bone scanners at area 51 I think he probably

worked there in the cafeteria a bit and he just knew that info and then just got a bit yappy. Did you just say Bob Lazar was a dinner lady? I don't know how much

I believe him. He's been finishing his entire career. I'm quite a... This man is doubting someone else's story. I believe Mike McCrum over Bob Lazar.

You are fucking mental. Bob Lazar, what proof does he have? Quite a lot. What proof does Mike McCrum have other than leaving his cell phone at the beach? Other than his proof being he disappeared. Yeah.

Bob Lazar's still knocking about. Got on podcasts, made money off it. Yeah. What did Mike get out of it? He could have got a brand new job at the FBI. He could have just been... By the way, he didn't have to have went through. He might have just died

and been murdered by the Secret Service for doing too much stuff. Or his wormhole ended up right at the bottom of the Marinara Trench. Yeah. Because the Men in Black are real as well and stuff like that. And they used to take you away and kill you.

What? Men in Black, like the film, like those are based on real people. Yeah, but they're not... No, they used to cover up aliens. Yeah, they had like a monitor and it goes beep and then you forget everything. No, they used to turn up.

There's like pictures and videos of them I can teach you about that in the future if you want nah I'm alright yeah I do really

like when you teach us things of all these facts and like they're definitely true definitely true Mike McCrum

well the thing I said about how time travel works is right realistically who's the expert I know how time travel works

you don't that is true you've done me there what I said is true do you know what I can't wait for the comments they'll say low key know low-key what lewis also lewis is banned us from uh fact checking and cross-referencing anything he says in these episodes so we apologize if we come off really stupid just stops the flow and i like yeah you need to use

your knowledge to of wormholes and knowledge of a disappearing man i know how wormholes work as well so a black hole is a wormhole. And say you're going into a black hole. Is a black hole a wormhole? That's just like, it's antimatter, isn't it? It probably is. You don't know if that's true. You don't know if a black hole is a wormhole. Probably.

Because there's no evidence of it being. There's no end point. Yeah, exactly. This is a crazy thing. It's just matter imploding on itself. Not necessarily. You don't know for certain. Okay.

But you do. You can't see beyond the singularity do you know what the singularity is no you'll get all of this stuff from a fucking

Christopher Nolan film this is not this is not scientifically fully accurate the singularity is so imagine yeah you just end up

behind the bookshelf in your own library 10 years ago so the singularity do you know like it pulls in light and the way you see is light bounces off your eye so that's how you see your body be black so the singularity do you know like it pulls in light and the way you see is light bounces

off your arm so that's how you see your body to be black so the light obviously as you get closer to the black hole it's slowing down slowing down

slowing down before it eventually comes in so there's a point where the crossover is where the light just stands still that's the singularity

because you can't see beyond that point you're getting pulled in at such a rate that before you process that your body's been crushed to death but from watching from the outside that's why you can't see beyond that point. You're getting pulled in at such a rate that before you process that, your body's been crushed to death. No, but you say, but from watching from the outside,

that's why you can't see past the singularity. That's the gravity, isn't it? Because it's frozen. So if I was to watch you... That's what a black hole is. Have they put things in a black hole yet? No. How would we ever know what happens there?

It just disappears. Just keep far and shy. But if you were to go into... Do you know where the nearest black hole is? How far? You can't get near one, can you? Fucking billions of years away. No, miles away.

Miles away. If it was near us, we'd start getting fucking pulled into it. If we start sending shit to it now- That's why they've tried to recreate them, haven't they, and stuff? No, even if you sent shit to it now, it would never reach them.

Yeah, and also we'd have to- Very big. We'd have to hope that humans in like 100,000 years time would be able to account for the evidence we've just discovered. Say we started throwing like Chris rappers in and stuff while we threw Theo in.

Like we'd watch him get sucked in and then it would be a point where he'd just like freeze because that's where the light, the singularity is, where like the light of bouncing off him has frozen. So he'd just be there frozen in time from us watching from the outside. Meanwhile, do you know what? It's cold when you get sucked in.

If that's true, that's actually quite cold. It is. Do you know what? It's cold when you get sucked in. You get spaghettified, spaghettification. You turn into spaghetti. You jump in. I see.

He's saying it like, yeah, no, fair enough. Definite proven. I'll definitely go to Black Hole. I mean, Black Hole knowledge is good, man. Theo would try going to Black Hole. I'll definitely go to Black Hole. You'd probably eat yourself.

I knew that was coming. I knew that was coming. Oh, spaghetti. Oh, look at the spaghetti fingers. Right, so the- You could have that with the Maranara Trench. The story is probably 1% true. That's true.

The rest was kind of interesting. Yeah, of course. You've just been holding your breath for the last two minutes. Yeah, why did you go so red? I was so fucking red. Your eyes are like about to pop. Right. That was actually a good little segment there, Luke.

Well done. That was your best one yet. I challenged the comments to cross reference because it's true. All the space shit is good, but Mike McCrum I'm not. Mike McCrum? There's things that people have- Mike McCrum sounds like he's just been made up.

That's a football manager regent. Yeah. Nah, nah, nah. The name you get given on career mode. We already seen the time travellers. Mike McCrum. No, we haven't. Yes, we have.

People haven't time travelled. The guy who pulled them out the way of the car. You are joking. Fucking hell. You are joking. What about the woman at the JFK Kennedy who wanted a front seat? The JFK Kennedy. And then she went missing.

JFK Kennedy. John F. Kennedy. Ron Burgundy. Ron Burgundy. Please subscribe. Yep. Bye. You made it to the end.

Well done, you. If you haven to the end. Well done you. If you haven't already hit that follow button, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to catch more Backside, you can find us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram by typing in Backside.